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Ok so trying to keep this short. I have been friends with a girl for almost 4 years now. We have been good friends, we are there for each other if the other needs advice or wants an opinion on what do. We would often eat together, she would invite me over and make food for the two of us. Things that friends do. Every 6 months or so we usually get into an argument and it takes a week or two before things are normal. Lately it's been different. Last summer we got into argument because she guy she was talking to was bad so she became angry at me for saying that and we didn't talk the whole summer and she blocked my number. I told her at the end of the summer that if she didn't stop then I was going to walk away and she started to talk to me again. After that we were good, we went to the movies together, made food for each other, hung out, talked to each other, all the normal stuff for about 7 months. Then in March she started to become distant again and I found out she got a boyfriend. She kept ditching plans we made so I told her that just because she has a boyfriend doesn't mean she has to ignore me. She got mad at me again and blocked my number again. She wouldn't even meet up to eat for her birthday. I don't what to do. She told me she was begin distant because we hung out too much and didn't like how I would react to certain things. I told her we should talk about it because that's what friends do and move on from our problems. She got mad and told me we were never friends, which is a total lie and I told you that until she stops acting this way and lying just to seem like she is in the right then we need time away from each other. That was 2 weeks ago. I don't want what I should say to her. Our college semester is over in 2 days and I really want to eat with her before summer break because i'll be busy with a job and won't be able to see her much.
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Drop her. She seems more trouble than she's worth.
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You are a potential threat to any boyfriend she has and she understands that. Good for her, I wish my ex had the sense that your friend does. You're secondary to the boyfriend and that's the way it is supposed to be with inter-gender friendships.
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>>17132984
A threat? How am I a threat? I just want to continue to hang out with her the way we would before she got a boyfriend.
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>>17132991
Have you ever fucked her? If not, why not?
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>>17132991
Because even if you haven't fucked her, that level of friendliness gives off the vibe that you've fucked her. And if you keep being that friendly with her, guys will keep thinking you're fucking her.
When she said "we weren't friends" I got the impression that she wanted you to be more than a friend and you just didn't get it.
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>>17132999
>>17133006
We never fucked. We never dated because I was afraid it would ruin our friendship. She isn't the type of girl to have sex outside of a relationship so the opportunity never came up. Fucking her isn't my intention, i'm just trying to save our relationship without making anything worse in the process.
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>>17133018
You sound like the Champion Defender of the Friendzone. You should abandon your silly notions of male/female friendship and realize sex is the most important thing between a male and female. Sex is the bridge on which true equality and harmony is built. Get it dog.
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>>17133028
How does that solve the situation at hand? Before anything else I need to fix our friendship.
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>believing the male-female friendship meme
everytiem
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>>17133018
>>17133030
You can't have it back as it was. Once you're adults you need to realize that there are no inter-gender friendships between straight people that allow for close proximity. That kind of intimacy is what relationships are for. You should have asked her out.
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>>17133038
So I have to come on to her? I can't do that. She has a boyfriend until he goes to Germany this weekend. If I try while she is dating someone then it will just make her hate me.
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>>17133041
Just tell her the truth. Say something like "I never realized it before but after almost losing our friendship, and asking for advice on 4chan, I know that we are meant to be together and I'd like to celebrate this discovery my thrusting my erect penis into your wet vagina."
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>>17133041
Right now you are the fall back guy. If she's out of a relationship she has you to lean on to make the lonely go away. If you're comfy with waiting for that position again, go ahead, but I read what you said in the OP as a sign that she wants you to assert yourself.
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>>17133052
assert myself in what way? I'm just becoming more confused the more I think about the situation.
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>>17133048
If I tell her the truth right now, when are friendship is not very well and she is in a relationship then it's almost guaranteed that the response from her will not be good.
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>>17133059
our* not are. I can't even spell right.
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>>17133059
Then chill out and wait until things are calm and then be honest with her. Maybe it will be better because the boyfriend will be gone.
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>>17133056
You're on your own there. Like I said, my ex lacked your "friend's" sense and decided to go on a 2-week vacation with her "friend," without me, and then dumped me afterward.
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>>17133074
Maybe that's why i'm screwed. I like her, never made a move, and now that she has a boyfriend I don't want to put a move on her but it seems like I can't be just friends without losing her.
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>>17133073
Probably my only option without making things worse.
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you stealth wanted to date her for a long time. you had too many opinions on people she dates. you didn't respect her right to disappear into boyfriend land when she starts dating other guys. you were intense enough that it got to the point where she blocked your number twice.
basically you handled this "friendship" all wrong the entire time. you're not a good friend either. just give up on being around this person and take this as a lesson of "how not to act around girls" in the future.
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>>17133101
Not happening.
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>>17133083
I can't comment on how you should make your move, but I assure you that you cannot stay just friends forever. Either move it forward or accept it fading.
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>>17132971
lol
the way you describe the friendship it sounds kind of shit. also that she has on multiple occasions felt the need to block your number and you had to ultimatum her to be friends with you again is just... gross OP
you might really want to eat with her or see her. i believe she's made her stance on the issue quite clear but if you want that all you can do is ask i guess
desu you seem like a complete fuck because even in your telling of events you sound like an overbearing weirdo
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>>17133161
I guess we can't all give good advice
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>>17133168
its crucial to identify when some people are asking for help with something that doesn't sound good for them.
OP's relationship with this girl sounds unhealthy as fuck for a variety of reasons. if he wants to beg her to acquiesce to go out to eat with him one last time before summer.... ok? gl?
pretty sure a nice long break from eachother is for the best, hopefully one or both of them grows the fuck up over the summer or something
Thread posts: 27
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