Should sexual history even matter? It's talked about a lot

In my experience, girls don't respect guys that have lower counts than them. Even if they lie about their number.

Of course they will deny this, but they deny all of their shitty hidden behaviors.

Take this as you will.

>>17079017
Probably going to get some flack for this one, but I don't really think it matters at the end of the day. There are shitty, predatory people out there who have had lots of sex, there are those who have had none, and there are plenty in between. What matters is that you are not getting fucked over or fucking the other person over.

It depends, if it's an ungodly number like 50 before they're out of high school then that won't sit well with me. If it's like 10 by the time they're 20, that's okay

not tht it shouldnt its that it doesnt matter

thats it thats all

>>17079036
But *why* do you hold that opinion.

I personally don't think it matters. Sex doesn't have to be held on some pedestal. Sometimes it is just a mechanical means for pleasure.

A lot of people don't understand how healthy relationships work. They date to force things to work with a person instead of to see if things work with a person.
From the beginning, the focus is on winning the relationship and having the upper hand. So any sign that their partner has a better score on anything than them is a RED FLAG, because the person probably has more self worth and can't be as easily manipulated.

Less talked about because it doesn't trigger as many people, but some men get uncomfortable if a woman makes more money than him too. He can't comprehend that she would ever respect him or want him when she has more money.

>>17079046
Do you seriously believe personality and character are totally unrelated to your sexual history? Do you seriously believe someone's past isn't a good indicator of who they are now?

*why* would someone have countless previous partners? *what* kind of character goes into that sort of behavior?

>>17079086
I see. This, combined with >>17079028
Makes a lot of sense.

Sex is no different than most other things in life - excellent in moderation, detrimental when taken to the extreme.

I'm not going to say that this is akin to a physical law - there are always plenty of exceptions - but generally speaking it does end up being the case.

>>17079048
Sex is an incredibly intimate experience you share with someone. Someone who just views sex as masturbation is a sad, hollow pathetic person who most people rightly do not want as a partner.

>>17079110
Is there a reason sex should be that way? Why couldn't it be glorified masturbation?

>>17079017
Most guys like myself that can't handle a large sexual history in a woman because having that much sex means you don't value the sanctity of sex. If you were to eat pizza everyday for a year you wouldn't really cherish anytime you have pizza. And if the woman has had sex with 20 guys it almost seems like just another guy. They have images they can recall from other guys, they have comparison to so many experiences. I was never abstinent but I figured sex is a pretty special thing you shouldn't give away to a lot of people. If the girl has trashed that idea, then it kind of ruins it for the guy and vice versa. Now that I've had sex thousands of time, I still believe in this, because they've all been with the same girl. How would my hypothetical next girlfriend feel if I say I've had sex thousands of time. Would our first time really be that special if I've already done it a thousand times.

>>17079129
Why does it have value to you? Why not just fuck for pleasure?

>>17079147
You may not understand, but some people have the radical notion that human beings are more than just animals blindly following their instincts and drives for "what feels good" and instead believe that discipline and a code of well-adjusted morals will lead to a more successful and fulfilling life.

>>17079272
I understand pursuing something more than your basic desires, but why does frequent sexual intercourse fall under the umbrella of degeneracy?
The driving idea behind this being that as a male, I'd say I'm not a virgin by choice.

>>17079286
Frequent pleasure seeking of any kind in excess is degeneracy
In Jewish/Christian beliefs, promiscuity is clearly defined as degenerate/destructive and some have religion as the basis of their morals.

Others use their own experiences to judge why it may be bad. I'd say most sexually loose people that I have encountered have all sorts of their own other issues and problems. The older friends of my parents who were quite sexually active with many people tend to be alone without children now, while those who had healthy relationships have healthy families. Sex is an important part of a relationship.

I'd say there is nothing wrong with frequent sexual intercourse, but having it with many different people is quite degenerate and can hurt both yourself and others in terms of building healthy relationships.

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>>17079017

>A lot of lonely guys here are worried about being taken advantage of as a "provider" later in life, but why does number of sexual partners matter?


Because the majority of men that troll this board are young and to young men the only thing important is pride and social standing.

They can't love a bad looking girl or else other men will call them inferior. They can't love a girl who had more than a few partners because other men will call him a cuck. He wants the hottest, purest girl he can find so he can hold her above his head as a trophy; his proof of manliness and superiority over all other men.

They can't rectify their feelings of inferiority with the fact that the woman they have feelings for has been sexually attracted to someone that wasn't them. To the frail, young, male hierarchy, loving a girl like that makes you inferior.

Granted, there are women out there who don't respect themselves and take unnecessary sexual risks but this isn't about character of the girl or a health issue, its about how many other men "used" your girl before you got to her.

Its a caveman thing, basically.

>>17079017
I like people who have a low count because it demonstrates self control and reflects their opinion of sex.

For example, I have had dozens of oppertunities to hook up with guys. I restrain myself because I know that personally, sex is an emotional thing. I can't have sex with someone without feeling an emotional connection to them. I've had sex with two people, and they were both people that I dated for 3 years each.

I want someone who also views sex as an emotional thing, not just as a fun activity between two people.

People who have had a lot of sex with a lot of people get kind of desensitized to how meaningful it is, in my opinion. That's fine and I don't think having a different opinion on sex makes them bad people- I just couldn't have one of them as a sexual partner.

So two things are red flags to me- 1) a high number and 2) The presence of "one night stands"

>>17079017
>Should sexual history even matter?
Only if it bothers you
Would I care if she fucked a guy she was in a long term relationship with? no
Would I care if she had one night stands? possibly, I've got some conservative views
Would I care if she had an ex who was into feet and pissing on her? probably not
Would I care if she dated/fucked outside of her race? Deal breaker
Would I care if there are nudes of her floating around in my local town? Deal breaker
Would I care if she fucked multiple guys at once? Deal breaker
Would I care if she cheated in the past? Deal breaker
Would I care if she fucked a guy that had a life changing STD? Deal breaker
Would I care if she worked as a stripper/hooker/porn star? Deal breaker
Would I care if she was raped? Yes, because chances are she knew him, knew what he was like or got herself into a situation that could have been prevented

Sexual history as a whole doesn't bother me, but some specifics do, its usually better to get the main questions out of the way before you sleep together, granted most women will lie, but you have to accept that as you get older, women will have more and more history.

>>17079017
Being with someone just because you provide for them isn't healthy. And trust people when they say that there is more than one person in this world who thinks your a good/the best decision.

For me at least, it has to do with wanting a partner who shares similar values. Some people just like the concept of compatibility.

>>17079371
KEK
U
C
K

>Because the majority of men that troll this board are young and to young men the only thing important is pride and social standing.
The only men who compromise on pride are cucks, fuck social standing, but pride is one thing you should never compromise on
>They can't love a bad looking girl or else other men will call them inferior.
Rarely happens
>They can't love a girl who had more than a few partners because other men will call him a cuck.
Not true outside of 4chan
>He wants the hottest, purest girl he can find so he can hold her above his head as a trophy; his proof of manliness and superiority over all other men.
Well who really wants a woman who isn't fit to raise kids? (other than men who don't want to have a family)

>They can't rectify their feelings of inferiority with the fact that the woman they have feelings for has been sexually attracted to someone that wasn't them.
Not even part of the issue unless they actively find someone else attractive instead of them
>To the frail, young, male hierarchy, loving a girl like that makes you inferior.
Because it does make you inferior, nobody marries the town bike.

>Granted, there are women out there who don't respect themselves and take unnecessary sexual risks
You mean whores?
>but this isn't about character of the girl or a health issue, its about how many other men "used" your girl before you got to her.
And what her standards were for fucking them, a 30yo woman being in 6 separate 2 year (long term, probably reaching the stage of cohabiting) relationships since 18 is different to a 30yo woman who has had 6 one night stands since turning 18
>Its a caveman thing, basically.
Cavemen didn't care, we are a bit more civilised since then

Hookups and one night stands are a red flag for me

Ive had only one sexual partner
My ex gf of over 2 years

We had sex every day even more than once per day pretty often so you could say i had lots of sex
If a girl had lots of sex with a bf while they were together? Np
If a girl goes out and picks random dudes to fuck just for the sake of fucking no way im dating her

Would i care if a girl had group sex?
Yeah i dont really like that
Would i care if she fucked guys without protection? Yeah i dont want std's
Would i care if a girl was raped?
Not a red flag/dealbreaker vut yes i would like her to get comfortable with the notion of sex if she has problems with it because of everything
Would i care if she sent nudes to guys? Yeah especially if it was posted online but not a deal breaker if it wasnt a lot of different guys and shit

Something about values and stuff

>>17079017

>Should sexual history even matter?

I can't really say, but as a wizard, I can tell you it certainly does. It has stopped me from dating, since I'm going to be rejected for it being a huge dealbreaker

>>17079400
>Would I care if she was raped? Yes, because chances are she knew him, knew what he was like or got herself into a situation that could have been prevented

I don't think you understand what being raped is like. I was raped by someone I knew, but the whole point is that I didn't know he would do something like that.
If I had, I definetly would have avoided him at all costs. It'a not like I wanted to be raped, it literally ruined a large chunk of my life. The whole point is that you trust that person- they've earned your trust somehow.

I do agree that you can be skeptical of a girl if she tells you that she was raped/ask about details to try to understand the situation more- but you shouldn't necessarily assume that she's lying or making excuses.
Do women lie about rape? Yes.
But does real, violent rape actually happen? Yes. And the women who are victims of that should not be treated as though they're lying or that it's their fault.

There's always something that could have been done. She COULD HAVE taken self defense classes. She COULD HAVE carried a gun on her. Women should be responsible to an extent- for example over drinking around people who you don't trust is irresponsible behavior. But the line on acccountability needs to be drawn somewhere.
Ultimately it is the fault of the rapist for raping the person. I understand that irresponsible behavior on the part of the victim may worsen your view of her situation which is fine. But I personally think it's a stretch to tell someone that they should have been able to tell that someone was going to rape them. Rapists arnt all creepy old men. Sometimes they're funny and smart and seem chill. If they seemed like rapists, then victims wouldn't stick around them.

as long as men are judged for not having a lot of experience/being virgins, women will be judged for being whores or sleeping around a lot.

As a women, I see a lot of my friends who sleep around a lot ALSO shaming men for NOT sleeping around a lot.
They want to not be judged for their sexual history while also judging others for theirs.
It's a selfish, hypocritical view and it delegitimizes the idea that sexual history shouldn't matter.

>>17079452
>I don't think you understand what being raped is like. I was raped by someone I knew, but the whole point is that I didn't know he would do something like that.
THIS JUST IN: women make poor decisions
>If I had, I definetly would have avoided him at all costs. It'a not like I wanted to be raped, it literally ruined a large chunk of my life. The whole point is that you trust that person- they've earned your trust somehow.
The exception doesn't make the rule
>I do agree that you can be skeptical of a girl if she tells you that she was raped/ask about details to try to understand the situation more- but you shouldn't necessarily assume that she's lying or making excuses.
I never said that, I just don't trust anyone who blindly trusts people
>Do women lie about rape? Yes.
Never even mentioned that
>But does real, violent rape actually happen? Yes. And the women who are victims of that should not be treated as though they're lying or that it's their fault.
Never mentioned or disputed that either
>There's always something that could have been done. She COULD HAVE taken self defense classes. She COULD HAVE carried a gun on her. Women should be responsible to an extent- for example over drinking around people who you don't trust is irresponsible behavior. But the line on acccountability needs to be drawn somewhere.
I never argued against that
>Ultimately it is the fault of the rapist for raping the person. I understand that irresponsible behavior on the part of the victim may worsen your view of her situation which is fine. But I personally think it's a stretch to tell someone that they should have been able to tell that someone was going to rape them.
There is always some responsibility by victims in any crime, no matter what
>Rapists arnt all creepy old men. Sometimes they're funny and smart and seem chill. If they seemed like rapists, then victims wouldn't stick around them.
Most people aren't that smart, women can be much less

I'll explain in part 2

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>>17079427

^^ This poster is a grand example of the your typical /r9k/-bred angry redpill edgelord. He literally proved every single one of my points with his pseudo-alpha bullshit.

Don't be like this guy, OP. Be selective, be proud of who you're with, just don't be this guy.

This is the guy that didn't do so great in high school and kind of missed the boat for getting to know women in his adolescence. He gets a little bit older, maybe goes to college and/or starts a well paying job and suddenly every time he sees an attractive woman getting something she wants he is reminded of every girl in high school that wouldn't touch him.

Suddenly he is the arbiter of sexual morality, ignoring his own inadequacies to instead become the judge, jury and executioner for everyone else's.

His réponse to every challenge to his manhood and/or believe system is to scream "KEK, KEK, KEK" and attempt to belittle anyone who doesn't view relationships as dominating the purest female in the village and putting babies in her.

This guy is a single-minded, short-sighted, sugarcoated bullshit excuse for a man.

The only thing you can do to be truly inferior is to be like this guy; the judge of all but master of nothing. The great love of his life will be a mutual symbiotic contract, they'll turn 45, have a couple kids, she'll realize what a cunt he is and then he'll be back here asking more /adv/ when his trophy wife leaves him for the first guy that actually shows her any true love and intimacy.

Please, OP. Don't be this guy.

>>17079479
It's not blind trust, the trust is accumulated over time. It's people who you think of as friends and who have "proven themselves trustworthy" in the past.

And that's fine- I'm not trying to say that you should believe a girl automatically if she tells you something like that- but the way you phrased it in your original post made it seem as though it was DEFINETLY a deal breaker, no exceptions, because of an assumption that you've made about all women who have been raped.

Again I totally agree that you should ask questions and decide for yourself whether or not she is sufficiently accountable for what happened.
But I encourage you not to just assume "this is her fault" when you hear the statement "i was raped"

The context of the situation very much influences whether or not it should be a deal breaker, in my opinion

>>17079036
>10 by the time they're 20
Anymore than 3 on a girl at that age is a redflag

To answer your question OP it's the same reason why I wouldn't date someone who has ever done a hookup
I'm just not interested in those kind of people

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>>17079017
>implying I am a pointdexter chump who is willing to commit to the town bike

no woman with self respect would let her self be past around like a cum rag to every chad in town.

>>17079494
Tbh I'd rather be that guy than the cuck that ends up trying to tame the slut that cheats on him constantly

Your mentality is why weak numales exist

>>17079479
>>17079496
I'm well aware that not all women are directly responsible for being raped, however all women I've met who said "I was raped" had similar stories, like
>he seemed really nice
>we just flirted a lot
>I was leading him on
>I drank too much
>I can't remember anything

My ex was raped by the slimiest guy I'd ever met while we were dating, he was on her tennis team, I warned her that he was slimy, she couldn't help but fight his corner and say how funny he is and how he is a great friend, I just saw a slimy beta orbiter.
He would text her at stupid times during the night, when we went out he always tried pulling her away from the group to talk alone, he was always offering to take her out to places and drive her about.
One night she went out (with friends), then called me crying at 5am, I couldn't make any words out from it, she was pissed, I tried calming her down for 2 hours, she cried and slurred her words, then she apologised for calling me.
She had a few hours sleep and called apologising for waking me up, she refused to talk about it for a day, then she called me and told me that she was raped by... Slimy beta orbiter.
From what she claimed, he kept buying her drinks, she declined and went home, he went to "check that she was ok" and pushed into her flat and raped her.
I went straight to her flat, she didn't want to see anyone, she refused to go to the police until 3 days later, she had spent most of the day before sat in the shower, she had scrubbed her body, nothing under her finger nails, no evidence of assault, nothing.
The police couldn't find any evidence of force, he claimed it was consensual, didn't even make it to court.

In my town there are a lot of self defence classes, schools teach students to look after themselves, things like
>don't leave drinks unattended
>don't walk alone at unsociable hours
>don't walk alone in places away from the public eye e.g. woodland
>don't accept drinks that are not opened/poured in front of you

>>17079510

When you get older you'll realize how silly you're being. "Taming sluts" isn't the name of the game; its finding someone who is what you want them to be now.

When you get to be my age you'll come to realize that most women have had a party/wild phase. Same with guys. I just don't give a shit. If she's nice and respectful and funny and beautiful and I'm into her I could give less of a fuck what she did 15 years ago in college.

Right now the wounds are fresh for you. As soon as you grow older you'll realize cucks don't exist, alphas and betas and chads don't exist and its all a product of your mind.

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>>17079017
>Not wanting to know the mileage of a car you're going to buy

Come on, anon.

>>17079538
Keep telling yourself
I'll just keep laughing at the decline of marriage and broken families becoming the norm

You can deny reality and take this moral high ground where sex doesn't matter all day
It won't fix society or make it any better

>>17079496
>the way you phrased it in your original post made it seem as though it was DEFINETLY a deal breaker, no exceptions, because of an assumption that you've made about all women who have been raped.
I am a police officer, most rape victims know the rapist and had some idea that he was a bit "odd", most could have done something like not getting a lift from someone they don't trust, not blindly walking into someone's house or accepting a drink, EVERY TIME they ignore that niggling feeling that says "something isn't right" in case they offend whoever they are with, then they get raped.
EXAMPLE (we teach this in local schools)
If you are waiting for an elevator, the door opens and someone you see someone you don't like the look of in there alone, would you still get in it?
Would you really get into a metal box that has one door and is shut away from the rest of the world?
Would you get in because you didn't want the individual to think you don't trust them?
Most people after a few moments thought will say "I guess so"
In a town with plenty of self defence classes, with police visiting schools telling them not to trust everyone, people still make these stupid decisions, yes some women get kidnapped and raped, but the majority let social pressure get them into the situation.

more coming in another post

>>17079560
I don't date rape victims not because they might lie, but because they will try to absolve my future children of responsibility if they ever got harmed.
It isn't victim blaming, The issue is that you can't say "told you so" to anyone, you can't even offer advice to prevent it in the future otherwise their solicitors will try and sue the police for a lack of compassion.

People get mugged because they flash their cash in public
Houses get robbed because the owners announce their holiday to social media
People get raped because they presented an opportunity to attackers, be it through accepting a drink, a lift home or walking into a poorly lit alleyway

The difference between the rape and the first two examples? rape victims ignored that worry in the back of their head, the first two are due to modern social status norms (looking like you are rich or bragging about a holiday).

If a woman told me she was kidnapped and raped, I'd give her a chance, but the majority aren't, hopefully that explains why I seemed so definite about my view, but word counts are a bitch (which is also why I had to write so many posts)

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>>17079017
>Should sexual history even matter?
It depends
if you've fucked 600 HIV-positive niggers a partner would like to know
if you had a minor gay encounter with your cousin at the age of 15, keep that shit to yourself

>Is the idea that you're being chosen not because you're a good/the best choice but because you have resources the hangup?
That's part of it. It's kind of like the loser guy with no friends winning the lottery: they didn't want him around back then, but now they suddenly all want to hang out with him, flirt with him, etc? They treated him like shit and left him to face his darkest days alone, and now when he's at the top of the hill they suddenly all want to join him. Fair-weather friends.

There's also other factors. For example, i'm a medical student, and i'll probably stay a virgin until my late 20s. The sexual histories people post on here even at 5 years younger than me (eg "14 boyfriends, 80 ONSs, 30 FWBs, 20 fuckbuddies") is a powerful reminder that I pissed away the supposed prime of my life working night and day for 10 years while everyone else was out having fun and enjoying the pleasures of life. I've missed out on a lot, hopefully young love isn't one of them.

>>17079371
It's not a caveman thing, it's a human thing. Cavemen, apes, etc don't give a flying fuck about number of partners. They can't even count.

>>17079546

>You can deny reality and take this moral high ground where sex doesn't matter all day

Never said sex doesnt matter. You're straw-manning and I'm not biting, kid.

Its not moral high ground. Its years of age and experience that you lack. You're still a child so its not ridiculous to think you'd behave and think like one.

In the adult world, 90% of the things you're worried and conflicted about don't matter. We all have bigger things to worry about; things you can't fathom right now because your only concerning is making sure you get the freshest, purest woman of the batch and waving her around like proof of your manliness.

Its silly middle school bullshit. You'll see, hopefully. Maybe you won't mature at all. That's a possibility.

>I'll just keep laughing at the decline of marriage and broken families becoming the norm

The "decline" of marriage has nothing to do with what we're talking about.

>>17079494
1/2
Gotta reply to this strange instance of assuming things about me
>This poster is a grand example of the your typical /r9k/-bred angry redpill edgelord. He literally proved every single one of my points with his pseudo-alpha bullshit.
Nope, all experience
>Don't be like this guy, OP. Be selective, be proud of who you're with, just don't be this guy.
"OP you should date whores with 2 black kids"
>This is the guy that didn't do so great in high school
I got plenty of B's
>and kind of missed the boat for getting to know women in his adolescence.
I was on the rugby team, I knew plenty of women through senior school and university, I attended plenty of social events too
>He gets a little bit older, maybe goes to college and/or starts a well paying job and suddenly every time he sees an attractive woman getting something she wants he is reminded of every girl in high school that wouldn't touch him.
Women not wanting me wasn't an issue, I wasn't swimming in offers, but being on a sports team doesn't harm your chances

>>17079520
Okay. I can understand why your experiences this far have lead you to think the way you do.
And I can understand why you would hold your girlfriend accountable for something like that- especially since you had specifically warned her.

In a situation like that I don't blame her behavior for being a deal breaker.
But not all women who claim to have been raped were raped in such a way.
I think it's a good idea to take it on a case by case basis

>>17079612
2/2
>Suddenly he is the arbiter of sexual morality, ignoring his own inadequacies to instead become the judge, jury and executioner for everyone else's.
I offered my views to expand on OP's question
>His réponse to every challenge to his manhood and/or believe system is to scream "KEK, KEK, KEK" and attempt to belittle anyone who doesn't view relationships as dominating the purest female in the village and putting babies in her.
No, everyone can't have the pure virgin girls, I'm saying you shouldn't settle for the town bike
>This guy is a single-minded, short-sighted, sugarcoated bullshit excuse for a man.
A man with a job, mortgage and life experience
>The only thing you can do to be truly inferior is to be like this guy
I'm not dating whores, having standards is nothing to be ashamed of
> the judge of all but master of nothing. The great love of his life will be a mutual symbiotic contract, they'll turn 45, have a couple kids, she'll realize what a cunt he is
Detective in the police, knowing people is kind of my job, I've been in love with someone who was raped, I've interviewed victims and investigated rapists, I've been to domestics where someone cheated, I've been to assaults where someone found "the other guy", I've interviewed women who were so drunk they can't remember if they were raped, but they are bruised and bleeding.
I've seen plenty of bad relationships, the majority aren't involving people with conservative values, we are talking council estates, kids, teenage mothers.
>then he'll be back here asking more /adv/ when his trophy wife leaves him for the first guy that actually shows her any true love and intimacy.
I've never had ssues with love and intimacy, but at least now the theoretical wife is now a trophy one
>Please, OP. Don't be this guy.
Can I ask what your experience is outside of feelings?
OP wanted advice, I provided it, I don't have particularly bad relationships myself, I'm curious what qualifies you to judge me?

>>17079614
Its also worth noting that the gf who was raped is now my ex, the relationship went sour, she went out and fuck another guy, the story went from "I cheated" to "I was raped" to "I would rather be a whore than a victim" and changed every other day, the relationship was way too stressful to tolerate, I tried getting her help, she didn't want it, I ended up breaking up with her.

>I think it's a good idea to take it on a case by case basis
Me too, but the majority could have easily been avoided

Sorry if I seem cold about it, I have investigated a few rapes (they are scarily frequent, at least where I work), 99% are avoidable through slight situational awareness.
I hope that you got/get the help that you need, I'm glad that you could contribute to my posts and I wish you all the best with your recovery.

>>17079567
I understand your perspective- maybe my case specifically was just different.

I'm not a part of the feminist movement that insists that we should not have to take precautions because bad people should just not do bad things.

Bad people will always do bad things. it's our responsibility to do our best to avoid putting ourselves in situations where someone we don't trust could potentially take advantage of us.

What I'm saying is that it's more common than you probably think for the rapist to be a trusted friend of the victim. That's how it was in my case- i am typically very cautious to not show vulnerability to people until they've earned my trust. But when someone specifically deceives you, it's difficult to tell sometimes.
People get deceived all the time. When they find out their spouse cheated on them- when their best friend stabs them in the back- it's very common for people to misjudge in this way.
I happened to misjudge someone who turned out to be a rapist.

There were no signs of hostility or sexual interest, no flirting or drinking. He was dating a friend of mine at the time so I never saw him as anything but a platonic friend.

At any rate- you should probably know as a police officer that victims tend to blame themselves, and when they do that, they don't press charges and you can't catch the bad guy. The rapist then continues to take advantage of girls, and the cycle continues. The whole "it's not your fault" thing is more a way to get women to feel comfortable coming foreword than a reflection of reality.

>>17079639
Thank you.
You've been very mature and well spoken with your perspectives.
In the same way that my experiences have contributed to my perception on this issue, I understand that your experiences have done the same for you.
I also agree that people who tend to identify themselves as "victims" have somewhat of an attention-seeking personality. I havnt told anyone the detailes of my situation because I don't want the label "rape victim" to be incorporated into my identity. It's not how I see myself. I don't have a boyfriend right now but I assume that when I do get one I will have to tell him eventually. I guess that idea just makes me a little nervous- it's not something that I'd necessarily want to share with him but it's something that I feel like he deserves to know and decide whether or not it affects his opinion of me.

At any rate, I appreciate you sharing your opinion with me. I like hearing other people's thoughts on this even if it's kinda hard to talk about because I want to know what to expect in the future.

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>>17079017
>Should sexual history even matter?
yes

>A lot of lonely guys here are worried about being taken advantage of as a "provider" later in life, but why does number of sexual partners matter?
first of all that's exactly what it is. Having sex with many Chads then settling for a beta when you realize Chad doesn't commit.

More importantly, it's not just lonely guys bitter about missing out on sex. No guy prefers a girl with many partners over one with fewer. And more guys are waking up, look at marriage rates they're fucking plummeting. Here's a fun fact: men are creatures of logic. Like rats in cages, you can teach them to push a button when they get rewarded with cocaine upon doing so. You can also teach them to not commit but instead give zero fucks and treat women like sex toys if that is rewarded with sex, which is exactly what has been happening.

I still enter in LTRs occasionally when I'm very busy and need to relax for a while, but other than that my only interest in girls is as temporary entertainment or company (not just sex, general companionship also). In these days the price of commitment has become ever higher and the rewards negligible. So yeah it's cuck or get cucked. Be Chad or be beta. It's the grave you dug and you better make yourself comfortable.

>>17079086
>the person probably has more self worth and can't be as easily manipulated.

>sluts have more self worth and aren't easily manipulated

top kek stacy keep the bants coming

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>>17079546
>>17079427

What blows my mind is how people like this don't realize you're on the same level as those people on Trumblr that develop their own "safe spaces" and "Kin".

You've blamed society and developed a victim complex that you defend viciously. You can't control other peoples actions, people are gonna be dicks, they're gonna disagree with you, and they're gonna be sluts. You're gonna have to find a way to work with that in life or you're going to be unhappy.

>>17079017
Women having sex isn't an issue
Having casual sex without restraint and self control is

This leads to a web of lies by these women to men who value girls who value sex in committed relationships. That's literally it, and in this age nothing can discipline a women for doing this

Cucks and feminists attack the dude for having different values and feeling being fed a lie

>>17079660
>The whole "it's not your fault" thing is more a way to get women to feel comfortable coming foreword than a reflection of reality.
We don't tell victims that it is their fault, it is frustrating that you can't help stupid.
Cases like yours aren't all that common, yes people know their attacker but they don't have the no drinking/flirting/leading on thing.
>>17079681
>You've been very mature and well spoken with your perspectives
I don't get that much outside of work if I'm being honest!

Chances are that when you meet a guy the topic of rapes will come up at some point as rape is pretty common in modern media such as the news, TV, films, they even serve as plot devices (being raped is the new "parents murdered", but I can't see that being Batmans new origins story), granted some will be real cunts and ask the question "but was it rape" (lost count of how many relatives/partners of rapists and even victims ask that), some will call you "damaged goods", some might assume that you are stupid (I would fall into that category if I didn't know the details), some will be understanding, some will try to "fix" you themselves, genuinely believing that they can help more than a therapist with a degree (they end up pushing women to reenact the rapes to some extent or use details of it against them).
Having typed that, I feel a bit more shit about your situation, it won't be easy, I wish you all the best in dealing with it and I hope it doesn't impact your life much further.

>>17079110
AKA
>I`m a virgin

>>17079759
>You've blamed society
Society is to blame though.
When more teenage mothers exist, when more fathers walk out, when more divorces happen, when women are "free to do what they like with their bodies" and are absolved of blame, more kids are born to those people and the cycle repeats, usually with more than one child.
When X% of any degenerate group can push for laws or a political group can grab their votes to work in their favour, it becomes a social norm.

30 years ago in the UK living on welfare was a safety net, you applied for jobs for 6 hours a day when you were on it.
Now 9% (in 2013) of households (2 generations) have never worked, more and more people haven't bothered looking for work in years.
At least 13% of all taxes go straight towards welfare, this includes the disabled and elderly.
When one party says "we need to stop giving people an incentive not to work because welfare is too easy" and discuss cutting down how much money some get (some households can get £40k because they popped out a few kids and got so fat they can't work), the other parties denounce them and grab votes offering those on welfare a better deal, this tugs on heart strings (even those on welfare will have relatives who sympathise with them) and suddenly a large portion of voters will jump away from those in power, taxes increase, government jobs are cut and more people live on welfare.

It works the same with teen pregnancy and the rest, where I live small estates (a small housing estate has up to roughly 350 - 500 homes) were built so that those on welfare had somewhere to live, there is no longer a stigma around ruining your life in your teens, domestic violence is common and officers can be stuck dealing with an argument for 3 hours while kids are running around elsewhere smashing windows.
Encouraging or compensating those who make shitty decisions isn't what feminists do, I'm not asking for safe spaces, I want people to take some fucking responsibility.

>>17079834
Teenage birth rate is the lowest in England and Wales for over 70 years.

The Office for National Statistics said 25,977 women under 20 had babies in the two countries last year, the fewest since 1946.

Can't be bothered to read the rest of your rant but I'm sure there is plenty more miss-information you're spreading in it.

>>17079848
And you`re damn right. I read the rest and you can`t help but think that it`s a good thing such people are brave enough only to spew their opinions here.

>>17079017
Ive always assumed it was a few insecure boys believing in a meme.

>>17079848
I live near a town which is in the top 5 for teenage pregnancies, most houses I had to visit and that colleague has to visit were young couples on benefits.
Just because they are down overall doesn't mean hotspots are much better.

In the US if black on white crime was down, you wouldn't be more likely to walk in a ghetto.

To me it does, Im pretty afraid of being a provider type guy.

Finishing college soon, I plan on getting a decent job in tech. My parents have an income that puts them in the top 5% of America, not impressive by any means I have friends who's parents make over a million a year. So im afraid if i dated a girl and she saw that on top of my career job, $$$$$.

Im rather ugly though, no girl has ever approached me for a date or anything for that matter. The last time a girl spoke to me she needed help with a math problem.

So yeah i probably wont run into this issue but it would be first on my radar if a girl ever took a sexual interest in me.

>>17079017
If it's not a ridiculous amount like 100 no.

>>17079494
>This is the guy that didn't do so great in high school and kind of missed the boat for getting to know women in his adolescence. He gets a little bit older, maybe goes to college and/or starts a well paying job and suddenly every time he sees an attractive woman getting something she wants he is reminded of every girl in high school that wouldn't touch him.

that's me though ;_;
I'm actually really bitter but I'm trying not to be

>>17079890
I have never felt more sympathy than I have at this very moment. I'm sorry anon.

>>17079967
that sarcasm?

Yeah im rather lonely and would probably take it as some sort of joke if a girl ever expressed interest in me. Could always be worse, at least my parents took my to a bunch of cool places/countries and i got to stay at 4 and 5 star hotels :D Then my mom likes to remind me how i will end up like my great uncle rich and alone.

If a girl treats sex as something so undramatic that they don't mind having it with some guy they don't even know the name of in a bathroom stall or who sleeps with a random guy from tinder every week, she's devalued sex enough to actually care more about who to talk to in her lunchroom than who puts his genitals into her. She cares more about who's shaking her hand than who's putting his dick in her butt. It's become a meaningless act.
And if someone has devalued sex into something meaningless, what's to say that they care enough about it enough to be faithful? It's just sex!

Honestly for the right woman it won't matter a single thing. This is coming from a religious viewpoint at least because I'm Catholic just to mention. My fiancé is a virgin and has never had sex nor done any other sexual acts with any other man. I on the other hand have had sex with two people prior to her. To be honest I wish I could take back those two people and have her be my first just like I'll be hers. She never batted an eye and is happy that I am not super experienced. Any woman who really cares about you shouldn't care because 99% of the fun of sex is learning how to do it together, how to please one another, and being there experiencing that together.

>>17079046
Just because I personally hold sex to be a very intimate experience. Other people don't and that's fine but I think it is. I've never had sex with someone I didn't have strong feelings for

>>17079594
>never said sex doesn't matter
So the number of men a woman sleeps with does matter?

Youre making no sense and you seem to think I give a shit about female purity
Protip: I don't

It just doesn't take fucking classes and some bullshit moral high ground to see that modern women are trash

What even is the point your trying to make?
You think the betas of 4chan even chase after women? Are you that out of touch

>>17079759
What the fuck are you talking about

You don't even know me

I'm not crying about not having a pure waifu
I'm saying men who marry sluts is why our society is in the decline

No wonder this board regularly ranks at the bottom of lists
You people are a bunch of normalfag imbeciles

>>17079017
Of course not
Marry the slut you'll be happy

We're totally not living in a world where intimate relationships are deteriorating and people are willing to throw them away like used toilet paper

You want my advice? You fuck the sluts and you stay single because there is not any woman out there that won't fuck you over eventually
Relationships, marriage, all that shit is a scam if you can't smell it you're just gonna get fucked

>>17079990
I legitimately feel bead for you, honest

>>17079890
Anon I know your pain. My family's wealth puts them in the top % of America. Girls have never approached me with interest in dating for a long time. As I've gotten older girls very rarely show interest in me now but they never want to stick around long. Not only that but I've tried dating. Girls would rather be sluts then date a good honest guy.

As I get older and women realize they want to settle down and have kids I believe my luck will change. Unfortunately I'm jaded now. I refuse to provide for any women (even though I know they weren't the ones to blame) because I pursued girls and they just wanted to be hoes. I'm just going to abuse women when I'm older. I'll tell them I love them and how I'll be there for them and they'll think "He's rich and nice" and after I get what I want from them I'll just drop them.

Love isn't real.

>>17080140
>love isn't real
How long did it take you to realize this

Here's a fun fact most marriages weren't about love (at least the love that most people think of) for the majority of history
You can thank Hollywood for changing that :3

>>17079400
>Would I care if she was raped? Yes, because chances are she knew him, knew what he was like or got herself into a situation that could have been prevented

This is that moment where I wish I could reach through the screen and hit you on the nose with a rolled-up newspaper. Bad human. You know better than that.

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>>17080619

>>17079612
>>17079619

In this day and age having "standards" is a distorted excuse for treating women like garbage and holding them to standards that you yourself would never be able to achieve.

Protect your manliness. Defend it with your life because at the end of the day you'll find yourself alone with nothing but you pride to keep you company.

I've never said you should "settle" for a girl who doesn't respect herself and participates in risky sexual behavior, just don't use the number of guys she's had sex with as an excuse to impose your insecurities onto her.

If you like her and she treats you and she's a good person, well then her number doesn't matter. If we were all judged on our pasts for the rest of our lives none of you would be worthy of love or respect and you know it.

Imagine if every fucked up, degraded thing you did as a kid was held over your head for the rest of your life? Imagine if you got to fuck every hot girl you saw in college and for the rest of your days every girl looked at you with disgust and called you the "town bike"

You all pretend like sex is supposed to be this "sacred" thing shared exclusively in a loving relationship but if girls threw themselves at you you'd be crushing puss all day long and feeling GREAT about it. Its hypocritical denial at its best.

I just don't get you guys. I don't get you at all. Blame women for all of your inadequacies and ignore any of the telltale signs that you only have interactions with trash women because YOU YOURSELF are trash.

>>>17079997

Talk shit about how girls have "meaningless sex" all you want but if you were rich and a 10/10 movie star you would be having meaningless sex every second of the day. Fucking hypocrites and man-boys every last one of you. You don't give a shit about "meaningful" sex, you're just a goddamn sheep wishing you were a wolf.