How do I become less of a defeatist?
I met this qt that checks out literally everything I look for in a woman but I feel like she is way too good to be speaking to the likes of me, and I'm constantly running ideas in my head of how shes going to reject me, or how i'm reading this all wrong or anything else negative. I really dont like myself so I'm pretty sure thats a major factor in this, and this defeatism goes far beyond this girl, in that I always feel everything bad that has to do with me is automatically my fault and every time something good happens to me I cant accept that and find ways to diminish any good. I'm almost sure its because I'm so familiar with failure I'd rather fail since its something I'm accustomed to than succeeding because it'd be a strange experience. This isnt healthy and its really being detrimental to me right now.
>>16928697
>How do I become less of a defeatist?
You have to man up a little.
>>16928697
Start actually doing shit. Once you start actually succeeding anD getting rejected, you'll see success is worth the risk and rejection or failure isn't that bad.
Being terrified keeps you frozen. It's the worst possible thing to do. You don't get a win unless you play in the game, son.
>>16928697
Are you me?
>>16928777
Also not OP, but related question: I'm going to tell this girl I've been talking to that I have feelings for her, we talk nearly every day but we've only gone out once because she's busy with work or school a lot and our schedules conflict. I haven't seen her irl in nearly 3 weeks. How should I word it to not sound creepy or needy or desperate?