I really like a girl who happens to have a boyfriend. Is it possible

Bump because I'm in the same situation

>>16908899
Good luck!

"If she can be taken away by you, she can be taken away from you by somebody else."

Back off OP and move on.

>>16908924
This way of thinking is kinda retarded. Real life is not virgins and rainbows. If every couple met while they were all single, most of us would not be here.

If you was in the boyfriends position, you wouldn't like it if someone tried to take her away from you. Just leave her alone and find someone else.

>>16908924
False because I'm the best one for her.

>>16908941
I'm not and I don't care about that guy at all because I don't know him. If I were her boyfriend I'd be the best boyfriend she could possibly have. Besides my happyness is really important to me and so is hers, I want to be the one who makes her happy. No way of telling I wouldn't be a better boyfriend until I am.

>>16908943
If you are, then she'll realise that on her own.

>>16908953
BAM, OP... THIS

If you have to convince / persuade her into being with you, then you obviously aren't what she truly wants. If you manage to "steal her away" she'll ultimately still have feelings for the other fellow and resent you, and leave you.

>>16908969
>If you have to convince / persuade her into being
Are you saying that every succesful relationship is pure chemistry and nothing more? Because I'm sure people usually actually make an effort to get someone to like them back...

>>16908891
Everything can be broken, her relationship but your heart also. Take the risk if you want it is up to you.

>>16908977
Thanks. Well my heart is already a tiny bit broken now that I know some other guy is currently the luckiest guy in the world. But I may as well try if there's a chance she can like me more while she's with him. I wouldn't want to wait until they possibly break up because that may not happen.

>>16908986
I dont have experience with stealing someones girl, so only advice I can give you dont be or become a orbiter, but also dont rush it. Guess you'll have to find the perfect balance. And if it all fails keep in mind, the are more girls with the same intrests as you who can make you the luckiest guy in the world.

This is a joke, right?

>>16909025
Why?

>>16908891
Don't interfere with her relationship. You don't know her as well as her boyfriend does and you also don't know what he has to offer her. Have you considered that maybe you're just infatuated with your idea of her and maybe you're just putting her on a pedestal? Because believe it or not, she will have flaws and some of those flaws could me more than you could handle or expect.

Just don't interfere because of a silly crush. Sure you can still get to know her as a friend but don't try and steal her away. You should respect her relationship - she decided to be with that guy, she's not his property that he claimed.

>too lazy to look for another compatible person
>willing to break up a relationship for your own happiness

you sound like a winner

>>16909058
But the only reason she MAY be with that guy is because he met her first. That's hardly a good reason to me. I still have trouble understanding why 99% of the guys seem to have such a huge issue with someone trying to get a girl who already has a boyfriend. If I have to respect the guy so much it does sound like she's a property he claimed.
That's why my question was if it's possible for someone to fall out of love with her current boyfriend and in love with someone else or if that's the reason it's a lost cause.

>>16909075

Of course it's possible. It's happened before, many times, so it's always possible. Is it possible with you? We can't really know on our end, since you've provided no context on how you know her, what your relationship is, or if she's just some hot chick you see at the laundromat that you've never spoken a word to.

Yes, it would be a dick move to steal her from her boyfriend. You are doing something that is going to harm someone else, and you would also prefer that no one ever did this to you. However, that doesn't mean that people can just shut off their feelings, and if she really did like you, you and she shouldn't ignore that completely just because someone else got there first.

But, really sit and consider whether or not she's that special before you do something.

In the same boat but I know she is miserable with him...

>>16909095
Well I met her in some charity group last year that we both joined. We met quite a few times the first half of the year but I haven't seen her much during the second half and lately. We like the same music, we have the same views on religion and society and life. When she talks about most stuff she sounds almost like me. The times we've chatted we really seemed to be in sync and get along. To me she seemed sort of surprised in a good way to notice this too a few times.

>>16909130

I mean, good for you, but common interests doesn't mean you work for each other on a romantic/sexual level.

My last girlfriend and I had EVERYTHING in common and I dumped her faster than her head could spin because she was boring as shit at the end of the day. Every time we were going to do something, it was "whatever I wanted to do," so it got lame to have to drag her along all the time.

>>16909075
You completely misunderstood what I said - it's also HER decision to be with that guy since it is a joint decision. What makes you think she would even go out with you in the first place? The way you speak, you are already treating her as if she's property to be passed around. By trying to steal her away from a relationship she chose to be in, you're just showing her that you don't respect her and her choices. Women aren't objects to claim, mate.

Why are you so adamant to be with this girl? Is she really the only person you can see yourself with for the rest of your life? I think you're just letting your infatuation get the best of you.

Also just learn to accept life isn't fair. You can't always get what you want - just don't be so obsessive over this girl and what could've been if you met her before she met her bf. It'll do you more harm than good.

>>16908891

Then stay single. You cant' force anyone to have feelings for you.

>>16909192
I have no idea why you are saying I talk about her as an object. In that case you could say every single guy who wants a girl thinks of her as an object...
I don't get what's the big deal of respecting a relationship she has with a guy I'm not even friends with. If there's someone who maybe likes her more than the guy does and she also could potentially like this new person more than her current boyfriend, then what would be the problem of breaking the relationship?
I mean if you say I myself have to accept life isn't fair then it should go the same way for her current boyfriend.

>>16909209
That's not my question. You can certainly influence someone's feelings over you I assume. My question was if someone currently in a relationship could possibly develop feelings for someone else and if I can influence this or not (since for example I guess I can't ask her out on a date while she's dating someone else but maybe I can try something else). Which I guess it has sort of been answered in only one post above.

>>16908933
>Real life is not virgins and rainbows.
It's not sluts and drugs either. Want to know where I saw this kind of reasoning the most? Construction yards and trailer parks. It's the philosophy of human filth. "There's no one in this world purer than me, so if I'm nasty, so's everyone else."

Whoever the guy is, he will remember it, and God knows how many people it's going to piss off.
Your dick's thinking for you, son.

I've been in a similar situation as you.. Actually, its the same situation. I guess this is just how someone like me would handle it. This was my first relationship (if I can really call it that).

Primarily, I chased after her because I wanted to escape being a loner, even though I knew it was wrong, and that she had a boyfriend.

The thing about my situation though, is she's willing to go out with me. We've dated for a good 3 months or so (about as long as the college semester lasted, where we met.) and once, we even slept together.

The weird thing is though, that's all I did. No, I mean literally. We slept in the same bed together. Nothing sexual or touchy-feely or anything of that imagination happened.

At the time, I chose not to do anything to her because I believed I would be crossing a line that I wouldn't be able to back down from (It just felt wrong). I also thought at the time that if she was really willing to do something like this with me, and I really built my relationship with her ontop of this, I didn't think I would be able to trust her.

I never met her boyfriend, even though I asked her if it would be possible to meet the guy who I guess was competing for her affections for; of course, I didn't say this last bit out loud.

I never told her that I liked her, but I think she kinda knew herself that I did. I don't know if I actually know what its like to really like someone as opposed to a crush, but we've stopped talking to each other after I broke it off.

I don't know what I'm doing, or what to make sense of out of any of this.

>>16909211
You said you want to make her have feelings for you. Let the time do its thing. If you are the guy she should date, then she will notice you as her potential partner on her own.