I could use some serious advice. I Just got a letter from from

>>16608719
Ignore it. There is nothing he can do to change what happened. And I highly doubt that he's really changed.

You can only move forward, op. Just keep looking forward.

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>>16608721
I'm trying but the memories just keep rushing into my head. Over and over, my entire childhood was my mom moving us from relative to relatives houses while going through the divorce and court to get him arrested. And then the vague memories of when and where he did it, I remember it fucking all now and it won't get out of my head.

>>16608734
Just take some time to collect yourself, anon. Don't do anything rash.

>>16608719
Don't take specific action advice from strangers on the internet about something so important, I advise you trust you better judgement and decide for yourself, given everything YOU know, what you should do.

What you feel is right, IS RIGHT.

>>16608742
I feel like I should meet him, I don't know why but, I can't think of any way that I'd present myself without putting on some kind of act. Like being angry would be a show and immature, but at the same time I can't possibly think to show him and civil respect. I just imagine myself being quiet the whole time and let him do the talking

>>16608719
Have you talked to a professional about this?

>>16608769
Do what you feel is correct for YOU.

I don't think you sound like you want to put on any act, but being emotional detached during is possible if you want to do that.

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>>16608771
When I was a kid I saw a shrink, did fuck all but not trust my mom when I realized everything I was telling her she was relating to my mother.
Completely understandable in hindsight but at the time really fucked with my head.

OP he would probably ask you for money. He must be alone and poor as fuck, so he will try to present himself as a new person (probably a man "who found Christ") or some shit. But he hasnt change.

Meet him if you feel like you should do. But dont get involved.

Was a pedophile? There is RARELY no such thing, I wouldn't go near him. If he molested and sexually abused your 4sisters , he is a sick fuck,and your better off without him.Really. Rely on your gut instinct. Talk to some one who has survived an incestuous rape by their father.

Write him back, tell him you love him because he is your father, but you are unable to forgive him for what he did to your sisters. Meeting him in person would be ill-advised.

>>16608719
He doesn't deserve to have you in his life. He failed in his duties as your father and therefore he no longer has claim to that title imo.

The ball is in your court, you don't owe him anything so really you'll just have to do some soul searching and figure out what it is you really want.

Everyone needs a second chance. My father was not abusive but left my mother when I was 1. Visited him every other year because I didn't give a fuck. Now I'm 30, he's 64, I met him again to have a drink, and he never stopped talking, and I was there, drink in hand, listening to him talking, trying to see my reflection in him. It was emotional, and left me with a smile.
tl;dr give him a chance, people change in the span of a couple years, let alone decades

>>16608719
Don't talk to him.
He's a pedophile that ruined your family.

crumple it up and throw it away or burn it.

What positivity are you seriously expecting to come from this?

Have you considered taking him up on the offer, taking the gifts, and just beating him senseless?

Don't trust him. Even if he's your father you can't trust him.

"you are in my prayers"
tell him he is too, but usually you pray to god to fuck him the way he fucked your family

>>16609684
Changing from a pedophile to a normal person is basically impossible. The best he could be doing at the moment is chemical castration, which is unlikely.

Can you imagine yourself going from gay to straight?

You don't change a sexual orientation. If you have the bad one (pedophilia), you're human trash and there's nothing you can do to fix it.

Everyone is talking about him being a pedophile, but I suppose he served his time in jail. It's a terrible thing but it's a mistake he made a lot of time ago, and he was punished for it. He's ready to be a member of society already, I think he deserves to see his son at least

>>16609729
Imagine if straight men went to jail for having sex with women.

Would serving your "debt" and realizing your mistake kill your desire for women?

Not bloody likely. The father deserves no contact.

the present is his dick in your butt.

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Taking advice from strangers on 4chan about this isn't really the best way to go, OP. This seems like a tricky situation and should probably be handled with professionals or other adults who understand your situation better than the internet.

Having said that, it probably took your dad a lot of guts to reach out to you, but at the same time - he's obviously a person with a mental and sexual disorder and is capable of doing things to others with little to no regard for THEIR feelings. (Do you think he was acting on your sister's best interest by diddling his fingers inside their panties? No. That was a move based purely on selfishness and self-gratification.)

Parents CAN be predators. Parents CAN be toxic. It's perfectly ok to not want people like that in your life. Even if they are related by blood.
You are allowed to decline his offer and to tell him to go away.

Based on the information you've given us - I would send the card back and maybe write a little note that says, "I'm not interested in having a relationship with incestuous pedophiles who've hurt my family members and possibly other children since then. I suggest seeking psychological help. All future attempts at contacting me will be refused or deleted. Goodbye."

I mean, let's pretend you grow up and decide to have kids of your own someday. Would you want him around them? (God forbid, he babysits them...)

>>16608719
Nice Bait.

>>16608721

This, it is what one of my friends does by recommendation of a therapist.

The pedo wants to see if he can again assert control over his victims. Giving him any sort of attention is what he wants.

I think it's a decision you have to make with no illusions that he's changed one bit, or that he has genuine remorse. Further, how would you family (sisters) feel about you making contact again?

Frankly my gut tells me you should have nothing to do with any paedophile or abuser. But im not the one who has to deal with having one for a father.

>>16609431
^This. And tell him not to contact you again, and that if he really wants to make amends, tell him to spend his weekends doing charity work or getting mental help or whatever to try and make some rights after all the wrongs he has done. Tell him that even though you never want to see him, that you'll be proud of him if he can do that and that although you'll have no future knowing each other at least you can each be proud of each other.

I've never been in a situation remotely similar to this but it's my gut reaction.

Seriously though don't contact him or try to make amends or anything. Nothing he can do will change what he did, and if you know anything about sexual predators, it's that they will NEVER stop being predators. It's part of their deepest identity man. It's ingrained in who they are.

>>16608719
He didn't molest you so who cares? Bros before hoes.

>>16609791
Yeah, what if the card is fake?