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Hey /adv/ I'm 22, and from the age of 14 onward people

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Hey /adv/

I'm 22, and from the age of 14 onward people have been accusing me of being a drug addict.

The thing is, I've never touched illegal drugs. Actually, excluding one horrible experience, I don't even drink. I also don't smoke at all.

It's really frustrating. I've gotten a lot of shit over the years, from parents, teachers, and classmates. I've even been questioned by my doctor and some counsellors.

I want this to stop, but I have no idea why it's happening.

Has anybody else been in this situation?
Did you ever figure out why people suspected you were a user?
How did you put an end to the unfounded suspicions?
I feel like you're not giving us the full story.
It has to be something about you. Your cloths, attitude, friends? There is a reason they think this
Go punch them all in the face, and kick them in the nuts
I was diagnosed with depression at the age of 19, and told that I probably had it for years prior - based on how I couldn't recall feeling other than depressed.

I was an overachiever through most of school and university (so far, still completing Uni), but tended to have off semesters when I just suddenly dropped to barely passing for a month or so.

I've always pretty shy.

I was never social enough to have more than a few friend in school, but have more in uni.

I'm from an upper middle class family.
My dad works long hours, so I hardly saw him during the week as I grew up.
My mother had issues and beat me occasionally, and yelled a lot, which was stressful - but not totally crushing.

I'm not violent.
I don't have casual sex.
I'm not a party grill.

I'm a bit of a loner, I guess.

Music I particularly like: metal, industrial, and ballads.

I also like philosophy, anime, role play, single player games, and urban exploration.

I don't use any social media aside from Skype, so it's not like I've really crafted an image for people to sit back and critique.

Sorry for the long list of me-things.
I don't know which are relevant, but I've tried to include the things I have inklings about.
This sounds REALLY weird, if you're not sharing the full story, we can't give proper advice. Not saying you're hiding something, I'm only replying for your benefit, not my own.

What happened at 14 when it started?
What drugs do people accuse you of using? When you were younger it was probably just kids being stupid "you're different, I know it must be DRUGS! lel" Can't really imagine why adults would think so though.
Nothing screams drugs to me, cept maybe people saying it just to mess with you or to justify the way you are. So just say that when people cause you. "I suffer the occasional depression, family says I use drugs as an excuse because they can't accept they are the ones making me depressed"
have you asked why they think that?
what did they say?

>Has anybody else been in this situation?
Yes, people thought i was a stoner before I ever started. (i allways had an interest in it though)
I did pick up the habbit since and somehow people took me smoking weed regularly for being stoned all day every day.
>Did you ever figure out why people suspected you were a user?
because i had wild dirty hippie hair, tinfoilhat-tier political views and was kind of a stoner stereotype.
>How did you put an end to the unfounded suspicions?
grew up, took care of my appearance, actually started daily weed and occasional harddrugs, stopped talking about them so much. moved to bigger city where it's accepted.
I don't think anything strange happened when I was 14.

The only thing I can think of is that other people my age had much better social skills than me by then - so that's about when I probably started seeming weird.
But I don't know why weird was interpreted as on drugs. Maybe they were just being little shits.

As for older me... maybe there's some tinfoil tier political stuff, but I'm pretty quiet about it.

I also am not very materialistic, and try to look natural but neat (clean, modest, but not using makeup or doing hair fancy). I can't be bothered with the keeping up with the joneses mentality, especially when it comes to fashion.

When I was younger it was weed that people usually suggested, but now it's opiates.

I have asked why, a few times.
As a kid, yeah it was that I'm 'weird'.
But as I've gotten older, it's become 'well, you just seem a little... unusual. Are you ok?' and the other people then tend to look pretty embarrassed.

Maybe my social skills are most of the problem?
But I thought they were better, mostly, because I've actually got a stable partner and some solid friendships going.

I think taking better care of my appearance might help, but I also worry that it won't because I'm still the same awkward person under the gloss.
I would date you, only to be depressed together and watch it all fall apart.
"well, you just seem a little... unusual. Are you ok?"
My response to this would be to politely say yes thanks, and maybe subtly guilt them, stuff like "this is just the way I am doesn't mean I'm a druggy, people are allowed to be different", this is just off the top of my head there would be better ways, try not to cause arguments or be too defensive but make them feel a little guilty/bad for presuming you're scum when you seem like a nice normal person, pls be in london.
>"well, you just seem a little... unusual. Are you ok?"
probably you look tired with bags under eyes or something? sleep well, other than that, fuck them.

My response would be to make them uncomfortable by asking trough untill the rude nature of their comment becomes obvious enough for them to see.

you on heroin or something?
well, you just seem a little... unusual.
>unusual how?
ehm ehm ehm, like ehm tired or something
>why? bags under my eyes?
ehm ehm ehm yes
>do you think I don't know? does that make me a heroin addict?
ehm i didn't mean like that
>how did you mean it?
>do you think it's nice to say someone they look like a drug addict? or did you think I could hook you up or something?

perhaps when they start to spill spaghetti and obviously feel guilty relieve them by saying you haven't slept well or something.

do you happen to live in some redneck hell-hole?
Yes, I suppose I should come up with some subtle ways to guilt people for the suspicions.
Even if they mean well, it's a serious thing to imply and could hurt my reputation if they're off planning interventions with others.

I'll take two plans of attack from your advice, lovely anons.

1) Put more effort into maintaining a generically happy-normal facade in formal contexts. Much of this will come down to grooming practices.

2) Learn how to deflect suspicious and gently embarrass people into thinking harder before supposing drugs is the problem. Maybe be less gentle when the person is obviously rude and doesn't want to help at all.

I live in Melbourne, Australia.
It's a very arts and entertainment oriented city.
Bogans/rednecks aren't typically the ones giving me trouble.
It's usually either very polite people or stuck up kids with wealthy parents.

Well, it's about 3am here.
(Yes, I know I should be sleeping - but I was up studying and then ran through my day and came back to this annoying issue, so couldn't sleep when I eventually tried..)
I'm off.
I have work tomorrow.
I sure hope my eyes don't imply heroin use.

Thanks, really.
This is a complete shot in the dark, but do you spend an absurd amount of time behind the comp? It makes your skin go unhealthy-pale as well as the bags under your eyes and slightly weird behaviours, that mistaking a person for a drug addict is easy. When I had long hair, everyone thought I was an addict of some kind, though I never even touched weed (I avoid eating any drug, even antibiotics and such), all because of my comp obsessions...
perhaps you have some weird illness and you don't even see that something about you is not normal?
try going to a doctor?
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