Girlfriend's grandma died today, what the fuck am I supposed to say, how do I help her out? How do I support her?
The usual shit you say to people doesn't seem appropriate when it's someone I deeply care about.
>>16493080
"I know this is a hard time for you right now, but I'm right here with you and I'm not going anywhere."
If you knew the grandma at all, add: "She was a wonderful lady."
>>16493080
>The usual shit you say to people doesn't seem appropriate when it's someone I deeply care about.
this is exactly how i feel, but let me tell you something
it's bullshit
you know what she wants to hear? the same generic bullshit you know you're supposed to say. you can lead with "i know this sounds cliche, but..." and then unload like a hallmark gift card.
trust me op.
>>16493085
>>16493086
I'll be sure to give it a shot, but I have no idea how to follow it up if it doesn't work out.
>>16493095
so say that. be honest.
"look, i know it sounds cliche, but i just wanted you to know that i'm here for you. we can talk about it, or not talk about it, but i'm here. and i don't really know what else to say, but i just wanted you to know that i'm sorry for you, and i'm here for you"
fucking retard
>>16493100
How would that in any way help her? It's not the point to show that I'm trying my hardest. It's not about me, no need to be a cunt.
>>16493095
Follow it up with a long hug man, there's no need for a 30 minute funerary speech.
>>16493104
>How would that in any way help her?
how would it help her to know that her boyfriend cared enough to support her following the death of a loved one, even if he didn't know exactly what to say?
wow you're right, i can't think of any reason
>B-B-B-BUT I WANNA BE ORIGINAL AND MEANINGFUL!
it's a fucking death, she doesn't need that right now, she just needs basic emotional support. you're just too much of a self-obsessed autist to see the forest for the trees.
better act fast, because it sounds like you're not going to keep her for long, anyway.
Everyone has given you solid advice here OP. You're trying to make this more complicated than it really is. Your girlfriend will appreciate your words of concern and support. You should cuddle with her, hold her gently, and let her cry in your arms while remembering her sweet grandma if that's what she needs as well. Some girls want that, other girls just want to be left alone so they can deal with it on their own. You should know your girlfriend well enough to know which one wants.
I for one oppose the others ideas. Everyone knows all this "oh what a tragedy" sermon is pure bullshit, and I don't think you'd want to give her false sympathy.
Just be honest, tell her you don't know how to handle this, tell her you don't want to give false sympathy, tell her you're there for her and that's perfectly sufficient.
Most people appreciate an outspoken honest person.
FFS OP, just say "I'm so sorry your grandma died, she was such a sweet lady. I'm here for you if you need anything, just let me know if you want to talk about it or if there's anything I can do to help."