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I'm an average looking guy but a bit chubby, I work and

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I'm an average looking guy but a bit chubby, I work and I'm not a NEET anymore. But I still dont know where to meet girls and talk to the. It's driving me insane. Everyone says they can't go a month without sex I've been a virgin my entire life. What can I do to change this?
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>>16460538
Friends, if you still have them, are pretty good (not trying to be offensive there, but that's the bluntest way I can put it) maybe get back in touch with some people you knew/know from school, try to get them to +1 you to parties or something. Socializing is really the only way to get into something quickly, asides from online dating apps and shit I guess.

Get some nice clothes, and go outside. If you go to conventions like ComiCon or whatever, you'll be sure to meet people with mutual interests (provided you're interested in that sort of shit).
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>>16460557
I don't have any friends that would go to parties, most of them are as neet as me or worse and still get supported by their parents. I don't have anyone to reconnect with from school so I guess I'm fucked. I tried dating apps but I either get no responses back or the conversations are really short. I went on a date with one girl but she stopped talking to me a bit after.
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>>16460538
You have a job; therefore money.

Hire a high-end escort, treat yourself, brother.
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>>16460571
I've actually wanted to try that but I dont know where to exactly handle that safely.
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>a bit chubby
Decide right now what weight you need to be at (in pounds), multiply by 11 and cut back your intake to that number. If you're miserable eating that little then swap some of the garbage food out for filling foods like veggies and leafy greens. It's too easy to not be chubby anymore.

>meet girls
At the bare minimum you need to go out in public. Just sit in a fucking coffee shop. At least you have a chance of seeing people. No one can see you at home. You don't meet people chilling in your living room. Your home serves four purposes which all start with an S:
>sleep
>shower
>shit (and preparing the food which comes out as shit)
>shed (as in, it's the place you keep your stuff)

That's it. If you aren't doing one of those things, get the fuck out of your home. Now ideally you should be spending your time more interestingly than "sit around in coffee shop." Do things. Do things which you've never done before as soon as you spot the opportunity to try them. Drive by a Vietnamese restaurant and never been there before? Pull over and have dinner.

Not only does this broaden your exposure, but it gives you a life. You need a life to share with others--both in words and in invitations--in order to develop relationships. The best dates aren't cliché bullshit like dinner-and-a-movie. They're you sharing with her the cool stuff you like to do and seeing whether she makes it better. Then she shares some of her cool stuff with you.

>virgin my entire life
It's a process. Let's be real about something. There are losers out there who have tons of sex. 90 IQ, ugly as sin, poor motherfuckers out there are...well, fucking mothers. The reason is that they have figured out with their tiny brains how to understand what those women want. You're probably very disconnected from women in general. It's hard for you to sit back and go "Yeah, I know some sorts of things that women are after." You have to start paying attention and getting to know some women. Learn.
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>>16460564
You're not necessarily fucked. Unless you were literally hated, and you went around doing stupid shit and provoked a bunch of people in your school, chances are the people (the semi-alright ones at least) will think you're an okay guy who's kind of weird. Go and talk to somebody who you know/think would go to a lot of parties, make friends with him and get him to +1 you, or explain your situation to him, if you think he'll care and you have the balls to do so. Remember, we're talking about chill guys here, not pricks - guys that you think are alright yourself, slightly on the fuckboi side of things but not in too deep, maybe stoners or whatever. Then, if you get in, which you probably will if you're as 'decent' as you claim to be, you just have to resist the urge to become a stoner yourself whilst being semi-interesting to socialize with.

Of course, if you aren't actually willing to reach out or don't know anybody like what I've described, then you probably are kind of fucked until you find an alternative. Good luck, I guess.
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>>16460579
>Decide right now what weight you need to be at (in pounds), multiply by 11 and cut back your intake to that number. If you're miserable eating that little then swap some of the garbage food out for filling foods like veggies and leafy greens. It's too easy to not be chubby anymore.
I've been going on a diet for 3 weeks I've seen some improvements but I dont think its going to help me in the long run with not being good with women.
> Now ideally you should be spending your time more interestingly than "sit around in coffee shop."
I don't really know what to do, I've tried going to random coffee shops and bars, random restaurants. All this did was waste money and not help.
>You have to start paying attention and getting to know some women.
It would help if I knew any.
>>16460583
> chances are the people (the semi-alright ones at least) will think you're an okay guy who's kind of weird.
I actually tried this, went out to eat with a few people but eventually they stopped talking to me even when I initiated.
>Then, if you get in, which you probably will if you're as 'decent' as you claim to be, you just have to resist the urge to become a stoner yourself whilst being semi-interesting to socialize with.
I'm not interesting at all this is probably the issue.
>are kind of fucked until you find an alternative.
If you have ideas for an alternative that would be cool. Thanks for taking time to reply.
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Tell me more about yourself. You seem okay enough.
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>>16460612
Well, try to develop some interesting interests, and pick better people to hang out with. And I mean parties, like parties.
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>>16460574
Backpage, followed by an escort review site. Choose the girl you like, and contact her; good reviews are helpful, obviously.

Explain that you are a virgin, and she will be very understanding. Just do your research, lol.
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>>16460634
What are some interesting interests I could get into? I also have no idea how to go to parties, I've never been to one in my life...
>>16460616
What would you like to know? I don't know whats applicable to say for this thread.
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>>16460571
This. Best decision ever made.
Granted I don't hire escorts, but I go in high end clubs, order shit and get drunk and fuck materialistic girls I'll never see again.

So OP, why the fuck don't you spend all of your money? If you're like me, you have nothing to live for and no motivation, so go crazy man. I literally have no close friends and no family and I spend thousands a month on just about anything. I also have absolutely no money put aside so whatever...

I swear you people are too afraid to leave your comfort zone.
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Find a way to make some friends.

Network and chill.
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>>16460644
>What would you like to know? I don't know whats applicable to say for this thread.
How old are you? Describe your personality. What are your hobbies and interests? Do you/have you studied past high school, and if so, what's your major? If you have a job, what do you do? What do you look for in a partner? etc.
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>>16460648
I'm guessing you're a bit more sociable than me, I tried going to a club a long time ago, I didn't really know what I was supposed to do, I was never in a party like situation like that. I ended up leaving after 45 min to an hour.
>>16460653
Well I'm kind of an introverted person but I'm open around my closer friends. I'm really into video games and older anime, but I haven't really had the time to play games recently so I've mostly just been playing stuff on my 3ds. I went to college for a year but ended up dropping out to pay my loans off. I worked in the oil industry for 2.5 years up until last month because I got injured, now I work in high schools around where I live. I guess what I look for in a partner is someone that will be able to put up with my lack of relationship experience and wants something long term. Hopefully that's a good enough description.
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>>16460683
No wonder women don't like you, you're a complete retard.
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>>16460683
Based on that description, you seem nice enough Anon. If you pushed yourself a little more socially, you'll be fine
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>>16460716
Do you have any ideas what I can do? I'm sorry to act clueless but I honestly will try something if you put something forward I haven't done.
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>>16460720
You say you're into video games, maybe see if there's some sort of roleplaying game shop/club in your town? Mine has a cafe that also has a bunch of RPGs and there's always people playing when I walk past. It's not exactly video games, but it's similar?
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OP, you really are kinda fucked and I'm not gonna lie.

If you're out of school / college and you have no lasting friendships or contacts, you're not going to build any anytime soon unless you work in a team-based industry in which you must work together with other people.
School aside, college is literally the last bastion of making any lasting friendships and building relations. Once you're out, you basically stick to what you got for a good portion of your life. Exceptions not included, but yeah. For the average Joe, that's the truth.
I really don't know what to tell you other than try making one friend. Even one, and that's usually the hardest part. Making that one friend.
Everything else comes after, when he introduces you to other people, then those other people to yet a few more others, and so on.
But for that to ever happen, you need that one friend, and unfortunately no one can ever teach anyone how to make one good friend. At best, following anon's advices, you'll only get a bunch of acquaintances, and we all know what we feel about acquaintances. Deep inside, we all kinda hate our acquaintances.

Since you're probably in the same hole as I am (based on what you said so far) you really have nothing to lose on a social level. You're literally a no one, am I right?
In this case, I dare you to tell the next girl that shows even the most basic attempt of attention, that you think she's pretty. Even if it's on the bus. Even if it's on the street and she just briefly gives you an appealing glance. No matter what, I dare you to do that. You have LITERALLY nothing to lose at all. You will most likely never see her again, and if you DO see her again, it'll only be in the form of a date.

I dare you to do it, but we all know you won't, so why did I bother writing all this? I should probably go to sleep, I must wake up in about 5 hours god damn it.
I'll be checking this thread OP s please respond
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>>16460784
OP has friends. Are you trying to make yourself feel better about your shit life or something?
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>>16460784

What >>16460793 said.

Also, there's hundreds of ways to make lasting friendships if a person actually cares enough to try things beyond their normal routine of going to work and going home. It's just that most people don't care, or they're too afraid to try new things and put themselves in new situations.

The whole "your opportunity for a life ends after you graduate college and get a job" is a meme.
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>>16460644
Anime and games are interesting to the right people if you can apply the right knowledge in the right scenarios. I can't really give you specifics, and that might not seem helpful but if you really can't determine what people would find interesting from what you find interesting, and know that other people wouldn't, then you're going to have a reasonably bad time. Next time Supanova (if you have it where you live) or Comicon (if you have that too where you live) or something like that pops up, use your money or whatever to get to it, because I guarantee you will meet people who will be interested in the shit you have to say there, and possibly even somebody who is less/just as inexperienced than you, meaning they'd pretty much have to be tolerant to it.
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>>16460784
I don't think I've had an actual conversation with a woman in years. I mean if I had any female friends that I felt would want to be with me I'd definitely try to make a pass. I honestly haven't even tried since college and every time I failed.
>>16460812
I don't know if its a meme... I'm experiencing it right now and I'm struggling with it badly.
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>>16460784
Nobody's ever fucked permanently though. OP might be fucked atm, but they're making an effort to unfuck themselves and that's what counts. With enough effort, one day, I believe OP will succeed and, perhaps even get fucked.

in the good way
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>>16460823
Thank you, reading this makes me want to try harder.
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>>16460821
I'm also experiencing. It's not a meme because it can happen. For eample a friend just happened to have a work colleague who came at work ONCE with a Horde emblem t-shirt. He asked him if he played WoW and so they became fast friends.
But let's be real, it doesn't happen unless you work in a place with human contact, which I already said. If you're also some programmer or whatever and work in a bureau in front of a screen, I doubt shit like that is going to happen.

But whatever, I noticed that people with no such problems (no friends / girlfriend / contacts) are never capable of truly understanding the trouble. They might understand what it's about, but will never truly understand and live the whole ordeal.

My suggestion still stands, read >>16460784
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>>16460824
And rememeber OP, your life is only just beginning after you graduate from college and get a job.
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>>16460833
>>16460835
Well I never graduated from college I dropped out. I worked in the oil industry for years and I never made friends doing that. My current job I don't really get any normal human contact either. That's why I'm trying to find ways to improve outside of work and school.
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>>16460833
You're making excuses and fishing for pity. You don't have the mindset to improve, OP does. Leave him be, he's not fucked, though you are.
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>>16460849
Yeah because every other advice in the thread is awesome and totally cool.

OP, my suggestion still stands if you have the balls for it
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>>16460855
I do have a few friends, you just want me to approach random women and compliment them? That doesn't sound like it will work.
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>>16460865
then do whatever you want. When was the last time your friends introduced you to any woman?
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>>16460833
No, there are plenty of people who have lived a life of being completely alone and suddenly figured things out and finally got friends/girlfriend/contacts, whether they were in their 20's or their 30's or 40's and so on.

4chan and the internet just likes to pretend that certain things are "impossible" beyond a certain point, as a way to make themselves feel better for not trying harder, AKA this: >>16460849

It's best to quickly recognize this mindset, so you can steer yourself clear of it and keep trying new things.
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>>16460868
Never.
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>>16460538
dude I honestly wish I knee so I could help ya. Just realize its not all bad and things could always be worse.

I'm in my late twenties, went to college, got a 4 year degree at a university, work in the medical field at a hospital, average height, fit from lifting and running 3x week, etc., and I am a kissless virgin. Granted I had to work for what I got, and I've made improvements from where I started back whenever I was first interested in females, but you'd think someone who has been actively trying to meet people would eventually hit a flash of brilliance..

The fact that lifelong methhead needle sharing HIV+ poverty stricken guys can get married, have kids etc., and I can't even get a date makes me pretty depressed
Thread posts: 37
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