Hello adv, need a little help. I am a girl aged 20, and I am

Is visiting him instead an option?

>>16455118
What if maybe it helps for solve problems in your family? At least now, if they focus on being nice to your boyfriend or maybe just tryng to look like a good family, they maybe solve their problems.
Idk, in the worst case your family fights but your boyfriend still there with you, so its kinda nice to have someone to be there when you need it.
Also sorry for mistakes, english is not my main language

>>16455154
It is an option which I'm conflicted about, as I don't want to leave my family for christmas in this state.

>>16455156
You are perfectly understandable.

That's what I meant with "pressuring my family". When he comes over it might put a lot of straint on my family to act all well and cool when they're not.

>>16455160
Yeah, well, you shall decide if you would like a temporary solution with a possible opportunity of a recover or maybe just wait the divorce to see your boyfriend who also wanna see you, like you wanna see him (and he might helps to pass over the struggle).

Just because you parents relationship is broken doesn't mean you should put yours on hold. Besides if your boyfriend tells you he's ready and willing to deal with it trust him and allow him to prove himself, he'll appreciate it. If he truly loves you he won't judge you for the way your parents act. And your parents too should be trilled to see you moving forwards in life.

Just give it a chance.

OP here,

I actually wrote my previous post in my girlfriends perspective to see what advice you would give her. I'm actually the guy.

I find it hard to figure out what to do. I really think we shouldn't cancel it and let me be with her and meet her parents. I am planning on proposing that I'll come there for a few days at first, just so I can at least meet everybody. And then we'd see how things are, if it's too much I'd go home early.

What do you guys think of it? Are there any other options for me? If she still wants to cancel it, should I just let it be? I want to help her and meet her family, and have been looking forward to spending the two weeks with her. I feel like it's kind of necesary for us to do this for our relationship.

>>16455194
Still thinking you shall go and help your gf in one of her worst moments in her life (kinda)

>>16455253
This is what I really want, be there for her when she needs it. But it's really hard when she doesn't let me. I'll try to convince her, we're having a long talk today but I don't quite know what to say.

Does anyone else know of other options to propose to her? Is there anything I could say to her so she knows how important it is I do come over?

>>16455118
it's weird for a boy to stay with the girl and her parents, you should have organized it so you stay with him.

>>16455339
That's the least of our problems right now .

>>16455339
yeah if you're 13
Once you are adults it is only weird to not want to meet the parents.I mean they're the fucking people that made the person you're in love with. If a guy doesn't want to stay over with my parents it's a huge red flag. I had two exes like that, one wouldn't stay because he was a scared little boy in the body of a 32 year old (I was 20) and the other because he was extremely immature, couldn't imagine going a night or two without having sex.

My fiance, a real man immediately wanted to meet my parents (he's also 32, I'm now almost 22), understood that it would be respectful to abstain from intimacy since you can hear everything in their house, and still had a great time.

Definitely go for it OP, you can't wait for life to be ideal, you just have to live your life. It seems like it could be a refreshing distraction/change of focus on everyone in the house.

>>16455118
Thanks to him your parents could get together again. Ho knows

>>16455508
Thank you, really. This is the advice I was looking for. First hand experience. I do realise myself it's really important to meet her parents, but she might not want me to come.

How do I make her realise it's important and that we can't wait for life to be ideal?

>>16455583
Small chance

Update: talked with her about it a bit. She said she didn't want me to not come at all, but perhaps a bit shorter. I'd still go there the day we planned it.

Just get a hotel. it might be a little more expensive, but that way you two can both have your "alone" time. And you can bring them to meet the family, but it wont be as awkward because your not staying at the house and you can leave when ever you want and go back to the hotel