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Crab asks you to save her's and Araragi's life. What

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Thread replies: 60
Thread images: 9

File: 000Crab.jpg (188KB, 1366x768px) Image search: [iqdb] [SauceNao] [Google]
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Crab asks you to save her's and Araragi's life. What do you charge her?
>>
>>114331177
anal
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>>114331177
Ask her to step on my dick and allow me to lick her shoe.
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>>114331177
Bathing with her and Hanekawa.
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>>114331177
I charge her nothing, because I know that will be what bothers her the most
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>>114331177
Can she sell Kanbaru's body to me, instead of her own?
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>>114331177
Kaiki's phone number, so I can try and fuck him.
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>>114331311
You need to establish yourself as bad in her eyes before that though.
>>
People in life threatening situations should not have to pay anything to be saved. such services should be rendered for free, and necessary expenses covered by the government. extorting those in imminent danger is morally repulsive.
>>
>>114331471
How much would it take for Kaiki to literally start whoring himself out?
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>>114331177
One hour of hand holding.
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Nothing because I'm not an asshole.
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>>114331620
While araragi-kun watches.
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>>114331607
That's... actually a really good question.
>>
>>114331177
She can be my golf caddy for a year.
>>
Hmm. Well it all depends on the kind of danger. I'd first recommend calling the police. If she can't do that then she should probably leave the city. I doubt Nadeko is going to follow her.
If she won't leave because Araragi won't leave his family behind and I have to physically deal to Nadeko then I would be following the Yozuru Kagenui school of thought since I don't think I can empathize with Nadeko well enough to convince her Kaiki-styles.
I'm presuming for this situation I have the required Onmyoji skills like Oshino, Yozuru and Gaen have.

I'd charge her a flat rate of 10, 000USD, plus expenses plus any hospital fees I incur attempting to exorcise Nadeko.

It's not a shit ton of money but meh
>>
>>114331607
>gloves
>wouldn't let nadeko hug him
>asked ononoki to move away from him
I don't think he likes touching people so he'd be an expensive as hell fuck.
>>
Her body
>>
>>114331177
Those glasses.
>>
>>114331177
SHe has to carry my firstbourne, and to acquire me a copy of half life 3
>>
>>114331784
He's probably not as bad as you think. He's probably the kind of guy who would fuck 10 girls for cheap, Oshino would be the kind of guy who fucks one chick for a lot of cash.

You see it all over the series.

Kaiki gives physical prices to each interaction he does. "I will consider stopping my business for 200k." "If you want a charm removed. That's 20k"

Whereas Oshino is always. "I'll remove your oddity for 100k. Unless you are Araragi, in which fuck it. Lets charge you way more."
>>
>>114331878
>not she has to bear a child every year until half life 3 comes out.
>>
>>114331177
Anal because it is not really sex.
>>
>>114331177
A night with Arararagi
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A one night stand with Phoenix.
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>>114331177
To tease and verbally abuse me and then laugh.
>>
Would crab of fucked Kaiki if thats what he asked for to save their lives? Serious.
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All she needs to do is to eat this bowl of raw eggs.
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She has to grow her hair back
>>
Hanekawa's love and affection.
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>>114333261
Yes, she would have. She's already been violated.
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>>114331177
Hold her hands
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Leave Araragi so Best Girl can finally win.
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>>114331177
I'd make her fuck Kaiki and tell Araragi.
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>>114333821
Incest is still wrong, even if you don't have a girlfriend.
>>
request to be turned into a vampire myself cuz that shit is rad
>>
>>114331177
I do it for free and then just leave, because I know I can't compete with Araragi (or even hope to compare myself to Kaiki).
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>>114334075
I'm sure she'll get you a Hot Pocket then.
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>>114333284
>>114333284
>>114333284
>>
She has to fuck Kaiki while Kanbaru and I hold hands.
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File: hitagi.jpg (22KB, 444x250px) Image search: [iqdb] [SauceNao] [Google]
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>>114331177
she's my waifu, so of course i'd make sweet sweet love to her. and not charge her a thing.
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>>114331699
Underrated post
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>>114334528
So her payment would be going along with your delusions.
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I'd request that she have a threesome with Karen and Kanbaru and allow me to record the events.
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>>114334075
>>
>>114331177
Fuck her a lot. That's the only thing she's good for.
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>>114331177
She's rich, right? I'd charge her like a hundred thousand dollars so I can pay off my tuition, get me a nice car and new computer, then store the rest in the bank.
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>>114335339
Did you even watch the series?
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>>114335339
>his tuition is less than a hundred grand
You lucky bastard.

Also, she isn't rich any more. It all got scammed away.
>>
>>114335433
I only watched up to Nise then I forgot it all really quickly anyways since the only thing I noticed was the tits and ass anyways. Like, how the hell do you expect me to follow the words when you give me a fucking slideshow of tits and ass? I don't remember one word in the show.
>>
>>114335339
Nigga she and her father are poor as fuck.
>>
>>114331177

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=W0m67tvx_C4
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>>114331545
What are you, some kind of SOCIALIST?
>>
I tell Senjougahara that she has to make a choice. If she wants me to save Araragi then she has to tell me why kids love the taste of cinnamon toast crunch and if she also wants to be saved then she has to tell me how many licks it takes to get to the center of a tootsie pop.
After all that, if she wants to save Shinobu then she has to tell me how much I can save on my insurance by switching to Geico.
If she's still opening her heart and wants Nadeko to be saved then she's going to have to get me a box of the breakfast of Champions.
>>
>>114331177
her insides
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she has to kiss araragi ON-SCREEN
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>>114331177
>What do you charge her?

I pull out my big black MP3 player, then put on Ice Cube's "Friday", and I ask her to perform her best attempt at crip-walking circles around me.

Afterwards, I get up, put my MP3 player back into my pants, tell her she was not good enough, and leave.
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>>114335944
mah nigga
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Several days of recording of her talking.
Some hours of sleep sounds.
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>>114331177
Her virginity. since she's not virgin anymore she can't pay, therefore I won't help her. Then she will try to ask the anon next to me. Fucking slut.
Thread posts: 60
Thread images: 9


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