Please help me summon literally anything. I want to study the paranormal and I just have no idea where else to start
You can summon an Imp : you need about a half gallon of bleach and a half gallon of ammonia. Make sure the room is secure, no open doors or Windows. Mix the two chemicals and a smoke will rise. . What you do now is focus on a shape, close your eyes and concentrate. Imagine the shape and say "imp I bind thee" three times then give it a name. The smoke will form into the shape and will last a few hours. It is a. Weak summon but good for starting
Why are you accusing me of things?
I do. Shall we discuss the price? It isn't a monetary one.
Because they sound accurate to me, nothing personal against you really, just the type of people who would believe someone like you.
You post in just about every thread and they are posts of no consequence. So I assume you are bored.
You are new, because you have that new guy energy. You act like you need to prove something.
You are a tripfaggot, this is undeniable.
Accusations are not inherently bad, and in this case they are correct.
Very well. It involves a semi-complex ritual and at least a level 5 knowledge of how the magickal principles operate. If, by any chance you aren't already initiated, (though I assume you are) do not under any circumstances attempt to perform any of the following parts of said ritual in the post below.
If you, by any chance, are uninitiated, and you do so chose to attempt the ritual, do at your own risk.
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I suppose I have no choice.
>at least a level 5 knowledge
lmao fuck right off
>If you, by any chance, are uninitiated, and you do so chose to attempt the ritual, do at your own risk.
This is actually hilarious. There is no institution that magically decides whether any ritual you perform will work.
Belief is a tool. Your only tool, actually. Believe it will work and your mind will do the rest. Just look into chaos magic and you'll be summoning local entities in no time.
1st - Entered Apprentice Degree
2nd - Fellowcraft Degree
3rd - Master Mason Degree
There are two more, but I am not allowed to say due to the majority of the uninitiated.
I'll met you at 4am (EST).
1. I think you're not a mason
2. Masons are always full of shit outside of the lodge. Especially when dealing with people who told the truth like >>17243095
Your secrets are on google.
When do you plan on doing the ritual? I had made the assumption that you plan to perform it shortly after I have instructed you. You will need to perform it at 5am for specific reasons.
Other days you will have to perform it at different hours as the planets are in different positions.
Dude it's practically a fucking charity do you really think this is some super secret club where we sit around ploting the downfall of humanity rubbing our hands in disdain ? Just fucking go to your local lodge and ask around or just get chummy with a member and they'll recommend you but before any of that spend a year volunteering at a soup kitchen or something and join a church.
This Mysteree Rite is not required for initiation, but it is offered by many POEE Priests to proselytes who desire a formal ceremony.
1) The Priests and four Brothers are arranged in a pentagon with the Initiate in the center facing the Priests. If possible, the Brothers on the immediate right and left of the Priest should be Deacons. The Initiate must be totally naked, to demonstrate that he is truly a human being and not something else in disguise like a cabbage or something.
Quiet, you. You're disrupting a special ceremony. We don't have time for your lies.
2) All persons in the audience and the pentagon, excepting the Priest, assume a squatting position and return to a standing position. This is repeated four more times. This dance is symbolic of the humility of we Erisians.
3) The Priest begins: I, (complete Holy Name, with Mystical Titles, and degrees, designations, offices, etc.), Ordained Priest of the Paratheo-anametamystikhood of Eris Esoteric, with the Authority invested at me by the High Priest of It, Office of the Polyfather, The House of the Rising Podge, POEE Head Temple; Do herewith Require of Ye:
ARE YE A HUMAN BEING AND NOT A CABBAGE OR SOMETHING?
The Initiate answers YES.
THAT'S TOO BAD. DO YE WISH TO BETTER THYSELF?
The Initiate answers YES.
HOW STUPID. ARE YE WILLING TO BECOME PHILOSOPHICALLY ILLUMINIZED?
He answers YES.
VERY FUNNY. WILL YE DEDICATE YESELF TO THE HOLEY ERISIAN MOVEMENT?
The Initiate answers PROBABLY.
THEN SWEAR YE THE FOLLOWING AFTER ME:
(The Priest here leads the Initiate in a recital of THE ERISIAN AFFIRMATION.)
The Priest continues: THEN I DO HERE PROCLAIM YE POEE DISCIPLE (name), LEGIONNAIRE OF THE LEGION OF DYNAMIC DISCORD. HAIL ERIS! HAIL HAIL! HAIL YES!
4) All present rejoice grandly. The new Brother opens a large jug of wine and offers it to all who are present.
5) The Ceremony generally degenerates.
Well for starters you're going to need a really cute blonde girl in the 13 year age-range, preferably not your own. You'll need some rope, zip ties, candles, a cat, some methamphetamine, and a Rolling Stones album (Beggar's Banquet)
Report back after you've gathered the supplies for ritual instruction. No, this isn't a joke.
When in Doubt, Fuck it.
When not in Doubt... get in Doubt!