When are we going to rise up and cast out games "journa

'cast out'? They're incompetent writers, not lepers.

You're aware that they're not good at what they do, so just ignore em'? This sounds like its bothering you more than it should.

Anyways, since goobitygate, everyone knows its all BS.

Were you this good with playing Super Mario Brothers the first time, anon? The answer is a most redounding no, but a hypocrite like yourself has too much of an ego to admit as much in your life. You need to go back into the kitchen and get on with your sandwich making for you if you can not learn to quit being such a damn hypocrite to the OP on here. I know that I can probably play better than the OP, but at least I am smart, as well as nice enough, to not be a dick about it in life. I will offer constructive criticism, which is ironic, considering that I am autistic and, as such, have a difficult time about accepting, let alone interpreting, it from other people myself, to people like Mr. Takahashi, but at least I have enough of a fucking brain that it takes people a while to get the hang of video games. Let me also remind you that, in this day and age, side-scrolling shooters are indeed a rare breed of video games and that they are, sadly, on the verge of extinction, so comments like yours will ensure that, in the long run, people that make games like Cuphead will no longer make games like that and, if they are done enough times, then they will also filter into the more polished and realistic games that everyone else knows and it will also contribute to a video game industry crash that will far exceed what happened in 1982-1984, though it will not be the only reason that such a crash will happen. I could go on about the potential crash/market saturation of the video game market as a whole entire topic itself in another discussion, but the fact of the matter is that elitist twat waffles like yourself fail to comprehend two of the key rules of video games, which are to explore the mechanics of the game play and, gasp, TO SIMPLY HAVE FUN PLAYING VIDEO GAMES! This is the point that I am trying to make to all of you ungrateful little spoiled brats and you all would do well to comprehend it in your lives.

>>389053832
>not lepers.
I would rather have lepers desu senpai

>>389053832
You shouldn't have a job if you are this shit.

>>389053661

This going beyond being bad, it's looks like a medical issue with hand eye coordination.

>>389053661
>Making me watch this again

FUCK YOU
I DIDN'T NEED THIS, I JUST GOT OVER IT

>>389053923
Your argument is bullshit, anyone who plays enough games to understand, critique, and respect can almost immediately adapt to a more unconventional or non-derivative control scheme, and in fact, LOVES games like that because theyre different and creative. Games like Kid Icarus Uprising, Wonderful 101, La-mulana, etc are loved by enthusiests but despised by journalists for his reason.

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>>389053661
>When are we going to rise up and cast out "journalists"?
>When are these frauds going to be exposed for the out of touch hipsters they are

Basically, journalists today are mere agenda pushing scum. You notice this in the topics you are an expert, but it applies to every single topic from politics to economy, environment and education to games.

Think about it. What if all media reports are as biased and bad as the ones of "games journalists", you just do not notice it as heavily because of less interest in the topics?

>>389053923
Nice pasta.

>>389053661
You're new, right? This was literally the point of gamergate.

Conan literally plays better than this games journalist.

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=NF3dT9bDu_4

>>389053661
Holy shit. Quit acting like games journalism is some hard hitting truth brigade and get your dick out f your own ass.Games journalism is and will always be nothing more than glorified ads for the product. Same with car magazines, gun magazines, and all other mediums aimed at a specific hobby. So they have opinions you don't agree with. They're a fucking opinions based medium, fucker.

>When are we going to rise up and cast out games "journalists"?

You sound like a neckbeard. Try r/gamergate or r/kotakuinaction, you'll be more at home there.

>>389055372
His point is that someone who is complete shit at an activity like video games shouldn't be reviewing the product.

Like a deaf person shouldn't review music

>>389055435
My argument isn't political you dumb fuck more that these people reviewing games can't even play fucking games.

>>389055489
That's even worse, because then you want someone with confirmation bias to go into a product already familiar with it.

>>389055804
That's not an argument, it's a trite observation. Any stupid fuck can upload a video to Youtube and have a website, and many do. It doesn't matter. It's funny to laugh at, and maybe it hurts a little to watch, but it doesn't matter and nobody cares. Saying that "we" should "rise up" makes you sound like a retarded social justice warrior. He's a harmless idiot.

>>389055962
>it's better for this literal invalid to say this game is too hard and give it a 4/10 because he is complete shit at video games
kys

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>I didn’t realize for quite a long time that you don’t accomplish anything by jumping on top of an enemy, like in the Mario games.

You'd think after trying to jump on an enemy a couple times and it not working, you'd learn not to do that. That's not even a video game thing, that's a basic way your brain works.

>>389056018
But the people like in the OP video have fucking influence so they might be dog shit at a good game and give it a shit review killing the chances of a good game getting a sequel and thus other games have to dumb down the fuck out of their games so they don't piss off reviewers.

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They can't keep getting away with it, bros. Everyone is gonna turn into a black man or woman. The white male genocide is coming. WE HAVE TO DO SOMETHING ABOUT THIS.

>>389056170
>But the people like in the OP video have fucking influence
They don't.

But you're right to criticize him for being shit, there's just no reason to go further than that. Turning it into some kind of crusade a la Gamergate like OP is suggesting is retarded. It's cringeworthy. Because it doesn't matter. He's just some chucklefuck on the Internet.

>>389053661
Yeah man, I only follow streamers and support them KAPPA KAPPA fuck journalism

>>389056397
>They don't.
They do and it's a problem we need to address.

Jesus christ, either that guy is borderline blind, has muscular dystrophy, or was outright hammered.

>>389056536
Well alright man, you do that if that's what's important to you. I'm out.

>>389053661
it is truly painful to watch

Most game journalists are likely people who went to school to be writers and journalists and then got roped into it because it was burgeoning at the time
I'm willing to bet hardly any of them actually planned to write about video games and they would've gotten jobs somewhere else if they could
This is why game journalists are usually pretty much just bottom of the barrel for the whole profession
Their writing style is always boring even compared to other types of critics and its only ever surface level insights just the most obvious things that almost anyone could point out

At this point Polygon is doing it on purpose so you'll pay attention to them.

Looks like it's working.

>>389056045
Yeah, because it's a fucking opinion. That's what all reviews are. If he found that it was too had and he didn't enjoy it, than 4/10 is perfectly valid.

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Well when you think of it. Who are the kind of people who listen to game journalists? I'm sure as hell the majority of us don't listen to them. Hippsters listen to Hipsters and creates this shitty ecosystem of agenda-pushing journalism.

>>389056663
ok later faggot

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WAIT hold up..
Have we ever had one good gaming Journalist that is genuinely into hardcore vidya, some oldschool PC games, and none of the "generic Zelda nintendo fan normie type"?

>>389057228
jeff?

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>>389053661
>that first minute of him trying to figure out the jump + dash

Holy fuck I'm hurting

>>389057228
Doritos Pope is literally the only journalist with integrity left and he had to become punished to get there

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>>389053661
just made a webm just for you, guys

>>389053923
>Were you this good with playing Super Mario Brothers the first time, anon?
Anon probably wasn't a professional games reviewer when he played SMB for the first time, you nancy.

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>>389056120
>leftists
>basic brain function

you're asking too much of them

>>389056773
That's a shit opinion and a shit review. I'd rather hear the opinion of someone that could actually get through the fucking tutorial of a video game.

>>389053832
this.
i know most outlets are a joke so I just dont read them. simple as that. No need to demand censorship.

>>389056397
>>They don't.
Not that guy but if they didn't they why do publishers/devs go to such lengths to set up review embargoes? To blacklist reviewers that don't play ball? To cut paid deals with youtube reviewers for positive scores/coverage? To base developer salary bonuses on metacritic scores on the games they ship?

I am not saying a game selling is the solely based on the dirty deals reviewers and publishers cut but to say that reviewers/games journalists have no power or influence over where this industry goes is plain and objectively false.

>>389057478
The don't read his review.

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>>389057417

>>389053661
>2017
>Caring about Games Journalism

>>389057417
>the part where he awkwardly pauses for 5 seconds then starts doing the correct thing

I bet he stopped and asked for help.

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>>389057417
I'm going to vomit

>>389057570
Is it really asking for censorship or is it more asking for critics to at least be knowledgeable in the hobby they review?

>>389057278
Jeff who?

>>389057417

obviously done on purpose
there's just no other reasonable explanation I'm afraid
you got tricked /v/

>Metacritic scores rely on reviews from people like him
>Certain companies don't give bonuses if your game doesn't reach a certain score

No wonder GDC has depression talks.
Years of effort decided on the whim of some hipster with an english degree.

>>389057417
The worst part is, you can see a long pause at like 50 seconds... I bet he asked somebody for help and they explained what to do to him

>>389057596
>lol if it's bad then don't criticize it!

fucking kill yourself dude I'll talk shit about whatever I want.

>>389057826
Didn't say you shouldn't.

>>389054935
Holy shit I never thought of it like this.
Now it all makes sense.

>>389057417
how does it take you 90 seconds to figure out a 2 button combination?

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>>389053661

This is painful to watch. How can anyone who works in the video game industry be this fucking retarded?

>>389053661
this is the first time I watched a gameplay of this shit, holy fuck it is horrible, why are people hyped for this game?

>>389053661

Shit journalism aside, the game does look pretty tight, was afraid they were hiding average gameplay behind a really good presentation.

>>389057762
>I'm just pretending to be retarded

The unfortunate fact is that game "reviewers" have already proven time and again that they're complete morons who just suck at the most basic shit at vidya.
This example is no exception.

>>389057982
I like the aesthetic of it and it looks fun.

Even if the gameplay didn't appeal to me I still greatly respect the amount of effort put into it's artstyle.

>>389057645
im sure there are tonnes of knowledgeable critics. they just dont work for fanboy/cheerleader sites.

>>389057982
go back to bed Dean

jesus christ this is almost as bad when polygon played doom.

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>>389056283
>fucking /pol/ is shitposting again!
NO
This isn't about /pol/, this is about critics being shit again. Watch the fucking video, you won't make it past the 30 second mark without wanting to pause it. This braindead fucker got stuck on a TUTORIAL LEVEL, and HE among other people just like him, are responsible for rating games for the masses.
This is a fucking problem because not only have critics been known to be lazy, this video shows that some of them, or at least one, isn't even good at the games they review. In this case, it was Cuphead: a SIDESCROLLING PLATFORMER, for gods sake.
That means that some critics just aren't passionate about gaming. You can make the argument that you probably weren't as good at Mario when you first picked it up, but think about WHEN you first picked up Mario for a second. Weren't you like, 5 or something? Didn't you actually get pretty good at the game by the time you finished it like, a month later? Isn't shit like that riding a bike? It doesn't really leave you once you figure it out. This goes for pretty much any platformer when you play them unless they've got other mechanics like momentum (I.E, classic styled Sonic games), and even THEN you still figure out how it works pretty quickly.
This asshole probably doesn't have a passion for games if he can't even pass the tutorial in a fucking platformer that's telling him exactly what to do, and HE'S in charge of the review of this game. He doesn't even need to have that passion; games are somewhat niche to the normie, so they wouldn't question it if they said the game was bad by merit of being the Journalist's definition of "hard".
Whether we like it or not, people like him are partially responsible for whether or not a game succeeds or fails, and it's a damn shame that a game like Cuphead, made by people who genuinely care about videogames and have a huge passion for them, has even a percentage of its potential success in the hands of a fucker like this.

>>389058052
>tonnes

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>>389057417
>One whole minute and more it figure THAT out
It's painful to watch. This is the kind of people reviewing our games.
This is the kind of people companies try to make happy while creating videogames.

>>389058052
whoops meant for
>>389057745
dunno how that happened.

>>389057762

the entire video is one big chain of similar failures, so you're wrong.

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>>389057417

post the polygon plays doom webms

the problem with all these drawn out games is always the hit detection
and it clearly shows in the video
it is almost impossible to make a decent hit detection with all those wacky animation and drawing styles

wait wait wait, did he fucking like pause for help at that jump section because he clearly just stands still for like 10 seconds????????

>>389058046
>I would eat a poo if it looks good

wew lad

>>389058120
yes. is this not a word in America or some shit?

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>>389053661
>not even a minute it in
>won't jump and dash
>just keeps jumping up a million times hoping per magic he 'll just randomly leap over the object

>>389053661
I'm bad at videogames but this guy is on another level.

>>389053661
>When are we going to rise up and cast out games "journalists"?

Why are you listening to people you don't agree with if you're going to get all flustered when they disagree with you? Are you retarded?

>>389058228
Spelled 'tons' in US.

Stop making these shitty bait threads, if you want to talk about cuphead just make a normal damn thread you autist

>>389058216
Not that anon, but man what a garbage analogy you just made.

>>389057417
AHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHH

>>389058259
Hes used to retard games like uncharted where the game grabs the ledge for you. Once that doesn't happen his brain can't process the scenario anymore.

>>389053923
Is this a compliation of all those whiteknight posts from the same guy in every comment thread? Feels familiar.

>>389053661
>>389057417

/v/ BTFO again

>>389058216
How is that at all equivalent.

I'm pretty sure you're just here to shitpost but that really isn't a good analogy.

>>389058319
I went in a Cuphead thread before and it was awful.
All that shitty bait and shitposts.

>>389058216
the poo is in the place where your brain should be

>>389053661
>>389057309
>>389057417
>basic kindergarten problem solving is this hard for gaming journalists
Holy fuck, how did he not kill himself after being stuck in the tutorial for that long?

>>389058462
He posted it in the comments section of the video in reply to some chick who was talking shit.

He said he's autistic though so I'm not surprised.

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>>389053661
Fuck you guys, he jumped in with cold fingers, also the game is hard

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>>389057417

>>389058534
It's always the same, some game is about to come out and everyone wants to get their shitposts in so they can scream how right they were if the game turns out to be less than stellar.

>>389053661
The fact that people don't demand to see the whole play-through from reviewers is really odd.

>>389058119
This pasta?

>>389058642
>i-it was a social experiment!

Fuck this guy. Dying once or twice in the first level is one thing; failing to figure out BASIC MOVEMENT is pathetic.

>>389058642
>social experiment
>I was only pretending to be stupid

>>389058642
>i-it was a social experiment
wew fucking lad, is it the 00s again?

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>>389058642
>muh social experiment

>>389054935
This is true. I noticed it in the last few years with music journalists. And now political journalists are arguably the worst, which used to arguably be the best.

this useless and retarded nu-male fuck will just use the negative comments and downvotes posted on the video as fuel for more shitty anti-gamer propaganda clickbait and too many of you dense fucks are falling for it

>>389057417
This is so fucking sad is not even funny. Tell me it was a joke or something.

>>>/wsg/1856982

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>>389053661
>>389057417

>>389053923
>The answer is a most redounding no,
>rebounding
Heh.

>>389053661
>lmao this didn't work the first twenty times
>better do it twenty more times!
is this how the low IQ solve problems?

>>389058983
with the music, i legit think this could be used as a torture device

>>389058793
>>389058807
>>389058815
>>389058871
You guys are fucking stupid and you need to learn reading comprehension. He admitted that he is bad, but this is a good social experiment to see people bitching about him.

>>389058746
>He thinks my legit angry response is pasta

I'm honored and ashamed

>>389058642
I can practically smell the yuppie retard vibes from his post.

>>389058170
At least Doom has some more complexity to it and it's hard to play a shooter on a controller.

Not defending polygon but their playthrough of Doom didn't literally have "press this combination of buttons to do the thing" written on the background.

I think whats funnier is right after the tutorial how he talks to the same guy 4 times for no reason what so ever.

>Cuphead is sure one hell of a good looking game. Unfortunately the real hell for the player is trying to understand how the game plays.
The tutorial seems to purposely create a steep learning curve for the average player after thirty seconds of gameplay.
It's clear the developer wanted to follow the trend set by Souls games but in the end they fall flat, with a game targeted to kids for its visuals but impossible for a kid to complete.
If you are into old toons, you better go to Youtube and watch Mickey Mouse than playing Cuphead.
5/10

>>389059029
>covering games for 25 years
>bailing ultra bad
well i hope he does not review games, because this looks really bad for him

>>389059029
You can't decide something is an experiment after the fact just because people are raging at you

>>389056773
>Yeah, because it's a fucking opinion

Yeah.

>this BMW i´m testing right know is absolutely terrible because i don´t have a drivers licence

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watching him mash jump for a minute straight without realizing what to do WHILE DIRECTIONS ARE RIGHT ABOVE HIM is really something else.

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>>389059029
you should try eating your shit as a social experiment

>>389059029
>i was only PRETENDING to be retarded!

Reminder: The WORST of games media STILL gets to keep their steam press accounts so they can whine about games they try for 5 minutes to stay relevant.

Arthur Gies, Mitch Dyer, Anthony Gallegos all have bragged abiut still having their accounts. Cut off the accounts and they won't be able to shit up games coverage.

Can we just post old toons?
https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=CNG8GYrh1mg

>>389059170

Big surprise, game journalists hate and smear /v/ types so /v/ types hate game journalists.

Hey Faggots,
My name is Dean, and I hate every single one of you. All of you are fat, retarded, no-lifes who spend every second of their day looking at stupid ass pictures and playing japanese games for pedophiles. You are everything bad in the world or video games. Honestly, have any of you ever gotten any pussy? I mean, I guess it’s fun making fun of people because of your own insecurities, but you all take to a whole new level. This is even worse than jerking off to pictures on facebook.
Don’t be a stranger. Just hit me with your best shot. I’m pretty much perfect. I was captain of the football team, and starter on my basketball team, also I am a video game journalist for 25 years now. What sports do you play, other than “jack off to naked drawn Japanese people”? I also get straight A’s, and have a banging hot girlfriend (She just blew me; Shit was SO cash). You are all faggots who should just kill yourselves. Thanks for listening.

>>389053832
>be a sandwich artist for McDonalds
>don't know how to make a burger, the fundamental core of your job
>get fired

>be a professional athlete
>can't run very long before you get winded
>get fired

>be a construction foreman
>fail to manage your workers and get a guy killed
>get fired

>be a vacuum cleaner R&D specialist
>your products blow up
>get fired

>be a "video games journalist"
>suck at video games and journalism
>faggots on /v/ defend you

>>389053923

Nigger when I first played Super Mario Bros I could barely write my own name. This guy is a grown ass man who gets paid to play video games. Kill yourself.

>>389056397
I used to view like you but it doesn't matter when it's a chucklefuck here and there, it matters when it starts becoming the norm.

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>>389057417
Woah so this is the power of gayman journalism

>>389059170
>Scream a bunch of unrelated shit when someone calls you out for being trash at your job
Why would you damage control on /v/ of all places, Dean?

>>389059735
How are you interpreting "don't read articles by shitty writers" as a defense?

>>389059619
I wonder how many old people fapped to this cartoon

DING DING DING this guy get it.

>>389059938
Not an attack of the guy I was quoting directly. My statement is backed by the faggots defending this shit in this thread. And is why what he suggests doesn't work. If you are not vocal others against your beliefs will be. Ignoring it doesn't work.

>>389053832
if your job consist on playing videogames and writing an article about game you play you should already be experienced with basic controls.

>>389053661
>Not even a minute in
>Watching him fail over and over again to get over that second tutorial block

AHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHH

>>389057417
Did they hire a small child? Not joking, that's 1st grader-level lack of problem solving.

>>389059976
I-I'm not that old.

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>>389057417
I refuse to believe this is real

>>389059976
Not many, this shorts were shown before feature films. I imagine with the distribution of the internet, a lot more modern cum has been spilled on any arousing material than it on its original release date.

>>389059938
Obsidian lost royalties from Bethesda as reviewers felt QA was poor in New Vegast, despite giving Fallout 3 high 90s while being buggier.

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>>389058642
>"I wonder why they are hostile to someone who is viewing the game as a beginner? Are we that intolerant of people who are not "gamers"? Should I have played the scene over and over until I was good at it"
If you had never played a video game before or are like a super young kid or like a grandma, then yes, I would be more understanding of your lack of skill and not understanding the basic tutorial parts. But your job is A GAMES JOURNALIST. You GET PAID TO PLAY AND REVIEW VIDEOGAMES so there is a certain level of skill that should be expected from you. So yes, I do expect you to be better than that. You get the opportunity be sent to games conventions all around the world to be one of the first people to view and play certain games and you can't figure out basic game concepts. Also why the hell are you comparing it to Mario? The devs said Cuphead was supposed to be a sendup to games like Contra. Why don't you know that? Aren't you supposed to be a games journalist? I'm not a journalist but I know that.

>>389057570
I've been avoiding reading or watching them for the past 5 years yet they're still here. Nothing wrong with people looking to accelerate the process.
The longer they stay in the industry, the longer it continues to be ruled and formed by their opinions

They're the reason Sony stopped making video games. When you can't play video games, you're going to be attracted to games where you don't actually have to play.
They must be fucking stopped.

>>389059029
>social experiment

Is this the new 'IT'S JUST A PRANK BRO'?

>>389059170
Please get banned.

>>389060193
>problem solving
what solving?
they literally TELLS him what to do

Basically this guy has never played a video game in his life.
The sad part is that you cunts are so far up your own ass you will never call this out in public all you do is shitpost here.
This is embarrassing.

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>>389054935
Nice job avoiding the buzzword.

>>389059735
Only one of those deals with opinions. That's the thing: opinions. Quit spending your time getting mad at what other people thinks. If you like a game, who cares hat other people think about it. The only reason you'd complain about someone else's opinions is because you know deep inside that the game sucks and you're just trying to seek positive reinforcements to make you feel better about your purchasing choice. Just be happy with what you play and not worry about what other people think, fucker.

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>>389058642
>the video shows it's a notch more difficult than your typical Mario game
you only had to jump and dash you idiot

>>389053661
stuck on the literal first obstacle for more than a full minute
cmon son

>>389058642
>tries to make excuses for lacking kindergarten levels of problem solving
This fucker should go back to school or kill himself already if he's this bad at fucking tutorials.

>>389058642

Woah its science guys,a social experiment

>>389060737
I don't think you can really define that as an obstacle.

>>389060641
>Be Writer
>Have "Bad" opinions
>get fired

>>389060641
Like clockwork.

>>389057417
I guess millions of hours of cuck leftist propaganda shoved into the tiny brain of the game journo doesn't leave much room for anything else.

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>>389060803
Forgot my picture

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>>389055962
>I want the people who write about a hobby for the benefit of hobbyists to not actually be a hobbyist and thus have zero actual clue about what the fuck they're talking about

>>389060509
Putting 1 and 1 together in that high jumping isn't enough, and you can't make it just by high jumping off the block, so you need to high jump AND dash to make it.

There's literally 3 steps there and he couldn't make more than 2.

>>389053661
it looks like a Contra game, with horrid hit detection

i still can't understand why blogs are shilling this game THAT BAD after all these years
even featuring their own personal issues

i am sure there are plenty devs dealing with life every day

>>389057443
Hate to break it to you, but he voted for Trump.

>>389060851
>>389060853
Yeah, that's what all entertainment product reviews are: opinions. If you're a news reporter, then you get paid to report facts. If you're an entertainment reporter, you just have to use a product and give an opinion non how you feel. Their words isn't the end all be all, so stop acting like they are.

>>389061006
My opinion is that you are a tremendous faggot who probably sucks at videogames.

>>389060898
>for the benefit of hobbyists
lol wut. This is for a general audience, many of whom will suck just as much as this guy.

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>>389058642
>How many games actually come with a tutorial these days?
The majority of games have that because most games tend to ease the player into it. It's basic game design. Even Dark Souls has shit like that with the messages you can read in the beginning that tell you basic game moves. What an odd question.

>>389061094
Okay. and that's your opinion. Feel free to have that opinion. It doesn't affect me.

>>389061006
It's fine to have opinions. It's not fine to base opinions on faulty input. If you can't play a game properly you can't rate it properly.

I can't rate a blow dryer negatively because I thought I could heat up my fish bowl without the world refusing to take muh opinyenz seriously.

>>389060193
now you're just shitting on first graders.

>>389061120
if you give enough of a shit to look up reviews you're a hobbyist, I'm not drawing the line very far here
unfortunately since gaming journalists evidently still exist, many hobbyists are retarded

>>389059735
>be game journalist
>instead of calling out and repoerting on issues that matter. i.e companies putting the screws to consumers with less content and shady practices
>COMPLAIN WHY THERES NO WOMEN OF COLOR

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>>389057417
couple of weeks later
>Cuphead, more like Soulshead
>kotaku

>I swear it is not a From Software game, guys!
>polygon

>>389057228
>>389057746

Jeff Gerstman

>>389059029
He "admits" that he's bad in a way that doesn't actually try to imply that he's bad at video games in any way, saying he was having a hard time because the game itself is exceptionally difficult when he couldn't comprehend very simple actions with on-screen prompts.

Like, yeah, I did bad, but hey uhhh... isn't this game too hard? It's *ok* I guess if you don't want to appeal to a broader demographic of retards such as myself, I *guess*, but umm... tell people the game is hard? How was I supposed to know this game expected me to press two buttons in succession?

>How many games actually come with a tutorial these days? They're no popular

Fucking tons of games have tutorials. Many are so overbearing about it that it detracts fro the game.

>Are we that intolerant of people who are not "gamers"?

I have friends who don't know shit about video games and would probably play similarly, but those people aren't covering games as their profession. People are ripping into this guy because he demonstrated ability below basic video game competency that transfers between games, such as being able to properly manipulate a controller, pattern recognition, and the ability to follow instructions. I speaks to how fucking stupid this guy is that he thinks his failings are the result of never having played the game before as if the ways he did poorly are mechanically unique to Cuphead.

What does this guy even expect his proposed easy mode, designed to suit players such as himself, to do? He couldn't handle the basic controls.

the thing is, features as pathetic as this only represent the real issue: journos want to be the protags of the feature

when you know you are trash, and there is no way you can provide a valid opinion on a game you clearly can't play, you just turn the feature into yourself
>muh social experiment
>shameless gameplay

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>>389054884
Its pasta from the comments of the video

>>389058119
>HE among other people just like him, are responsible for rating games for the masses.
The guy that played in the video isn't a reviewer of platformers.

>>389058642
>I'm not retarded, I swear
Reminder that he gets payed for that.

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>>389058642
>the game has a tutorial, therefore it is hard
>the fact that I am not able to jump over a block or not jump directly into enemies and die as if I'm playing a completely different genre of game is because the game is soooooooo difficult
>also I was cold, and this was a social experiment

I refuse to believe people like this exist. I am being trolled by a master of the art right now.

>>389061294
And what constitutes "properly"? That's how the game is. If the players don't understand something then it's clear that the game hasn't done a good job of explaining that function to them. People experiences things differently, and things that some people might pick up on naturally might not come as quick to others. Does that mean the person who doesn't enjoy it are obligated to give the product a good score just because someone else like it? No. It's THEIR opinion, and if the game didn't do it for them, for some reason or another, they have every right to say so.

>>389059619
Well, that was kino as hell.

>>389061574
I love when they use the nick in the discussions

>do you honestly believe that, XX69YOLOnigmaboy69?

the correct answer after watching this video is to just laugh
its funny that theyre so goddamn bad
theres no movement, no political propaganda
its a video game, nerd

>>389059170
Fucking pancakefags

Here's my question: Is the guy playing the video a reviewer? If not, who gives a shit?

>>389061574
>Mostrar Menos

I have no idea what heathen language your browser is set to, but I suddenly feel like I don't want you here.

>>389061574
Pax Humana is literally an employee of the company responding to every negative comment, which is basically every comment.

>>389061574
>You need to go back to the kitchen and get on with your sandwich making

Well at least /v/ can't accuse this faggot of being an SJW leftist.

>>389061689
That guy has the power to push potential buyers away with his retarded notion of games.
>theres no movement, no political propaganda
Get with the times, even milk is a political choice now.

>>389061708
His twitter:

>I have been a journalist for 25 years and am lead writer for GamesBeat at VentureBeat. I cover games, chips, hardware, R&D, and other tech.

>lead writer
>25 years

>>389053661
Forget that this guy is a journalist. Does he have a mental disability? He literally keeps doing the same thing expecting something to change.

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>>389057417
dunno whats worse:

>the reviewer's gaymen skills.

or

>the fact that the sheeple will eat this and NOT buy the game cuz A FUCKING AIRDASH JUMP! IN THE TUTORIAL NONETHELESS! is too hard.

>>389061621
>run into goomba 7 times
>never work out what to do
>put the game down
>write about artificial difficulty of old games
This happens and it is literally an incorrect opinion.

>>389061876
Me no comprendo, hombre.

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>>389057417
Jesus Christ. I felt like I was trying to pull my own teeth out.

>>389061752
Your power level is showing, /pol/tard.

>>389053923
Nice pasta, almost as nice as this carbonara
https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=K-PKO2FrdPY

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>>389061894
Gaming Journos killed the Videogames

>>389060539
>turn the page to national or international affairs, and read as if the rest of the newspaper was somehow more accurate about Palestine than the rest of the baloney you just read.
Shut it down!

He ran into the first enemy every single time. What the fuck. That's not just being bad at video games, that's being a complete fucking retard.

>>389061971
That's okay. I'm sorry for calling you a dumb nigger. That was really mean and unnecessary overreaction from me.

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>>389057939
Because player's usual gaming device has no buttons at all.

>>389061930
That's the beautiful thing about opinions, anon. They can't be right or wrong. Also, then the game should have some way of telling the players what to do.

>>389054884

are you trying to say every "enthusiast" likes KI:U, wonderful 101, and la-mulana? because I think uprisings controls are complete dogshit

>>389056773
Reviews should be objective you fuck

remember the time before niggers, spics, and women could play video games?

remember that golden age?

blame the jews for destroying video games and forcing the inclusion of subhumans into our hobby

>>389062323
>Also, then the game should have some way of telling the players what to do.
If I were a mod I would ban your retarded ass.

This guy may be shit at this game and his job but I looked over 15 days of tweets from him and didn't see the words Donald or Trump said once so for that he earns my respect.

>>389062360
Not when it comes to video games.

>>389061517
Gerstman is awful he loves COD and Horizon and hates hard games and eastern games.

>>389057809
imagine working on something then losing everything because someone decided your female character's tits were too big

>>389062323
What opinions are grounded in can very much influence an opinion's ability to resonate with others. And in the realm of public opinion and especially in review, resonance is the defacto form of fact.

Game reviews are not all opinion. And the opinions themselves have to be formed out of objective observation. When those observations are corrupted by poor intake methodology you devalue your opinion and weaken your ability to maintain relevance to the crowd most interested in the subject.

Opinions aren't a shield from fucking scrutiny you contrarian shit.

>>389058642
Committing the second greatest Videogame sin.
Johning

http://www.urbandictionary.com/define.php?term=no%20johns

>>389062367
>remember the time before niggers, spics, and women could play video games?

Considering that I'm a spic with a spic sister and we've both been playing video games since the Atari 2600, no, I can't say I remember any such reality existing.

>>389062740
>Considering that I'm a spic

Look at all this internalised racism.

To be fair, that looks pretty damn tough for a first level

>>389062740
shit cant ever see the world as anything but shit since everything around you is shit and you yourself are shit

>>389062923
Well that's just rude man. I'm sorry my existence upsets you so. :(

>>389060193
>"Dean Takahashi is lead writer for GamesBeat at VentureBeat. He has been a tech journalist for more than 25 years, and he has covered games for 18 years."

>>389054935
this
never trust the words of a reporter who isn't an expert in the field they report on.
Some would consider that a ridiculous standard. However, if you look how information is presented in today's media you should know that it's absolutely necessary to filter the articles or reports with this lens.

>>389053661
It's your own damn fault for reading videogame reviews at all. If I need to know if a new game is good I ask /v/. Then if everyone starts shitting on it I go buy it immediately.

>>389062740
Let me fuck your sister, I promise I have good taste in vidya.

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>>389057417

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>>389053661
Why does he keep looking up for absolutely no reason?

>>389063042
>hey bro this new zoo opened up should we go to it?
>idk, the LIBERAL NEWS MEDIA said that it was a fun zoo, but i dont think they have a funologist OR a zooologist on staff...
>FUCKIN JEWS

>>389063042
How can you judge whether or not someone is an expert in a field unless you're also fairly knowledgeable in that field? Go by other expert's opinions on them?

>>389063232
Why does he crouch almost every time he shoots?

>>389063086
Are you a skinny pasty white dude? That's the only way you're getting near her snatch.

>>389062649
But if you really were a hobbyist, then this review would not matter to you because you would already know that this playstyle is flawed. Instead, this review would be most helpful for others like him, who are not familiar with the controls of the average game. The people who are going to buy this game are not going to be swayed by this footage, and the people whoa re on the fence deserves to see this as much as footage of someone beating the game perfectly. By only having someone who is familiar with a product play it, you are essentially lying to people who are not used to playing games by making it seem easier than it appears. I've known people who gave up on Dark Souls because it was obviously too hard for their level of gaming but they were convinced to buy it form salesman who was more familiar with it then they are. These kinds of reviews, and opinions, are necessary.

>>389057417
link?

>>389058642
>merely pretending

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>>389063243
I don't know why but this made me laugh hard.

>>389063445
You're fucking retarded.

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>>389057417

>>389063546
>You're

>>389063371
one thing is seeing footage of someone legit struggling to play a game.

another entirely different thing is not understanding a really simple mechanic that is being clearly explained to you.

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>These are the same people who will trash the game with reviews

>>389063629
But that's correct you mongrel

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>>389063629

>>389063676
TOO HAAARD t. IGN

>>389063371
Approaching a hobby as an outsider through the lens of an outsider is how you fucking ruin that hobby.

Nobody should enter football because they loved the perspective piece written by a paraplegic.

I'm glad Cripple McGee struggled with the game and feels there should be special goalposts added for handi capable athletes such as himself to make sure everyone can beat the game, really I am. But he should find another activity with a lower bar and stop reviewing and influencing newcomers to football before he fucks up the game for everyone else who loved it the way it was.

>>389063445
it is just the intro of the OPs video, lad

>>389057417
Imagine being a developer and having to watch this happen in a live demo being streamed to 10,000 people.

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>>389053923
>Were you this good with playing Super Mario Brothers the first time, anon?
Considering that I could beat Super Mario Brothers when I was 10, yes, I'd say I was this good, if not better.

GET GOOD YOU FILTHY CASUALS.

>>389063750
>keep posting same image
>still hasn't made any argument against said thing
can you even read dumbass?

>>389054935
They are. There are only a handful of legal journalists that actually understand the law and how it is applied. The vast majority interpret legal news incorrectly, often to further some agenda.

>>389053661
>When are we going to rise up and cast out games "journalists"?
When people stop paying attention to Metacritic.

Friendly reminder that the absolute most asked question the devs get, whether it's at shows, on facebook, or twitter, is whether there will be an easy mode.

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>>389063676

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WAKE ME UP

>>389060390
No, that's literally the old JUST A PRANK BRO

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>>389058642
>Couldn't figure out the jump for 5 minutes. Just needed to press one button after jumping forward
>Just kept jumping at the ledge, somehow thinking that it work when it very clearly states to dash
>"There are going to be people worst than me!"
>This is professional that has pull in the industry to give out review scores
>Has to clarify that he wasn't playing bad on purpose to troll people, he just that bad


Did anyone notice how he can't shoot and jump at the same time? It's like he's only playing with one finger and keeps running into enemies because he can't decide to shoot or jump over them.

>>389053661
He is certainly a shitter but the game design looks horrid. The infinite respawning enemies looks like a pain in the ass, or perhaps I'm not so used to bullet hell games and i was expecting something more like Metal Slug.

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>>389064196

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>>389063042
>>389063296
I wish I could remember the name of this, but basically there's a phenomenon where if you're knowledgeable in a subject (like vidya in this case) and read an article, you can pick it to pieces and see its merits and demerits accurately. You might decide that the author is an idiot or whatever. However, given the same author writing about a subject that you're not knowledgeable in, you'll accept their words as those of an expert on the subject. This goes for wars, food, health, politics, whatever.

>>389064176
good thing it has one.


>>389064214
SAVE DEEEEEHHHMMMMMMM!!!!!111!

>>389053661
Most normal people that never play video games would still be able to figure out what to do there. It's a fucking tutorial, it TELLS you what to do.

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>>389064304

Meanwhile, some people who actually made progress.

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=FMTn926Sc-c

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>>389053923
>tfw nobody notices this is just a copy paste from one of the comments in the youtube video

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>>389053661
>the tutorial strugglle

>>389064280
Remember when /v/ flipped out over the Valve commentaries because they constantly described how they had to dumb areas down because playtesters couldn't manage it?

Videos like the one in OP are the lens through which games developers see the world.

>>389063640
Not clearly enough if this guy couldn't do it
>>389063787
Bruh, you don't get it. A crippled person would obviously not enjoy football as much as a person who is fully capable of playing it, just as a newcomer wouldn't enjoy it as much as person who's been playing for years. But when giving their opinions, should they lie and say that other crippled people or newcomers would enjoy it just because there are people who are able to play the game who does? No. Because there is a lot of people who are in the same skill set he is and probably wouldn't enjoy the game either.

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>>389064434

>>389053661
oh so this is the reason why "dark souls hardest game of all eternity" meme was pushed so hard

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>>389063243
>implying jews don't control the subconscious

>>389053661
>Dean Takahashi of GamesBeat has a moment of shame as he fails to pass a level in Cuphead.

I thought you guys said japs were goo ad video games?

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>>389064604

>>389064646
america grinds up other nationalities and spits out americans, for good and bad

>>389053661
The video game industry is full of people who couldn't make it in other fields, suck as writing books, doing anything in movies, etc.
It's not a big surprise that this same sort of thing applies to everything from game "journalism" to the majority of the players as well.
In a nutshell, nearly everything surrounding games is for and by the lowest common denominator.

>>389058642
>How many games actually come with a tutorial these days?
How can you be a gaming "journalist" and not know that almost every game released in the last 5 years has had a tutorial?

>>389064690
Do sharks have cocks? Because he looks like he's chasing after his next rape victim.

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>>389064690

>>389064562
>jump from the block with button A

>on the highest point (or more exactly, where the message is) press Y and forward to dash.

coundt be more clear! ANYONE can fucking do that!

the only people i can understand struggling like mr. retard there are children that have never touched a vidya in their lives.

the guy in the video is a PAID PROFESSIONAL, that kind of skill in a TUTORIAL is simply unacceptable.

>>389064756
I think you meant "the journalism industry is full of people..."

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>>389064887

>>389064646
>Dean
It's nullified.

>>389064926
Check your privilege, dude. Not every has the same motor skills you do.

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>>389064986

>>389064978
I assure you I said what I meant.

>>389065038
not everyone should be allowed to enjoy things

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>>389065074

I think the most important question is, if skill at actually playing and understanding video games isn't important, and the ability to put down your thoughts clearly in writing isn't important, how DO you become a paid video game journalist?

Could I approach GamesBeat and become a paid writer for them? And get early access to review copies of games?

What do I need to do?

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>>389065152

>>389053661
Every single day /v/ posts news or articles from these journalists. It doesn't matter if you are agreeing with, disagreeing, or making fun of them. In fact they intionally say things to provoke for no reason other than to get you to post their articles and be outraged.

When this happens they receive ad revenew.

So stop supporting them and they will lose their job in a month.

>>389053923
beat it at 6 years old.

>>389057417
Isn't this just a step more difficult than putting the square peg in the square hole? Guy basically spent a minute banging his square peg in the triangle hole.

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>>389064986

>>389057417
this is good
I can see this being a staple in rage threads

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>>389065234

>>389059265
oh god this

>>389065232
study for a journalism "degree" and be prepared to suck major dick (given your choice of profession, you should be used to it already)

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>>389065401

>>389059029
>No guys you don't understand....
>....it was a social experiment all along....
>....woah
Shitty e-celeb tier damage control.

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>>389065510

>>389063445
dean pls

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>>389065583
Last of the pencil tests from Jake Clark

How many people watched the whole video? (Or at least half, he never clears the beginning of the first level.) I swear he's just passing the controller between some small kids. There are lives where he seems to suddenly kinda get how to play and is killing enemies left and right no problem. Then the next life he'll just run right into enemies like he doesn't even understand that's bad.

>>389053923
>yes didn't die until I got to the castle
>not true I suck at high execution games until it clicks with me example A: devil may cry3 still beat it on normal
>not being a hypocrite
>because your tolerant of subpar and even pathetic people that doesn't mean everyone has to be sorry for having standards above the lowest bar
>this is a fair statement
>slippery slope logical fallacy regarding side scrolling shooters see contra 4 which based on that logic would have prevented cupheads existence, also there is a bubble and it needs to pop to prevent shitters accepting shit
>a videogame crash should be welcomed for the fans of the medium as it will lead to a Renaissance of good games occurring, then you stutter stumble into personal opinions
>none of the people with valid complaints of the highly touted review process in this business model don't miscomprehend it's merely an archaic model of advertising which should have been done away with long ago

your post is trash and you should have edited it instead of posting a poorly constructed op

>>389054935
That's the fucking thing.

I majored in chemistry with a minor in geology

Watching newspaper and ''journalists'' reports on related news hurt my soul, every single time. I also had the displeasure of doing a lot of classes on radionucleides, so anti nuclear threads are extremely painfull to read through

>>389053661
ITT: /v/ makes fun of a man with only 2 fingers and multiple learning disabilities

>>389065713
woops should read "oped" at the end

>>389057417
this is physically painful to watch

>>389060193
grade school kids can beat mario games that require more execution skill than this

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>>389057417
>>389053661
help

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>>389065681
forgot this fella

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>>389065747
>read science "article" on new discovery
>zero link to the actual report to be found
just give me the fucking thing I don't need to read your vomit-inducing prose you retarded hipster fucktard subhuman

>>389064474
it's too bad since whoever wrote it should read the responses here. Then again I dont want to induce brain damage by interacting with the lowest common denominator of commentary. It does explain why it's so fucking terrible though. I can only hope it was written ironically but if I were to check the users posts I'm sure they would all be equally as horrible such is a youtube comment.

>>389065747
The thing that'll destroy your soul is any class that involves statistical analysis. The second you learn how any statistic is supposed to be calculated or reported, you immediately realise that quite literally 99.99% of statistics you read in any newspaper, or see in any news report or government release are bullshit.

>>389053661
And I thought polygon's Doom gameplay was bad...

>>389065931
And the MASSIVE overstatement. While reporting on important but small in scope discovery suddenly become world changing feats.

>>389065858
These are all great. Thanks for posting them.

>>389058119
Its the only defense they have for themselves. Anytime someone shits on Journos cause they're shite at games someone always comes along and starts screaming goobergate pol reeeeeeee.

>>389054935
not only is this true but it's an issue perseverated by the fact that most """""journalists""""" are not actual journalists but instead pundits chiming in as a personality making personal opinions based on second hand sources which hadn't been peer reviewed but experts in the field. shit sucks but there is a lot of money in pushing an agenda sale or idea rather than reporting on a factual event or exemplary evidence.

>>389057417
>Giving-v-an-aneurysm.webm
Nice job

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>>389058642
>Maybe they want to target gamers with a love for difficult games. That's fine. But I think they should signal that.
games with difficulty beyond walking simulators should come with trigger warnings
fuck this guy
i just continue to get angrier and angrier with this guy

>>389058264
I be fair they have taken over when they changed the narrative. Gaming is dead, its full of stupid fags and trolls. Hell I don't even play games anymore I come here to spread the shill stuff to fuck with you guys.

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>>389066229
Glad you liked it, hope you guys don't mind me sharing some more stuff.
Here's Betty Beet, a cut boss from the garden gang

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>>389066501

>>389066350
Why not just lump walkign similuators into the ''not videogame'' category so he can enjoy those, and we keep the rest?

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>>389066596

>>389058642
nes/snes mario games weren't "hard" but did require practice and getting good

https://venturebeat.com/2017/08/24/cuphead-hands-on-my-26-minutes-of-shame-with-an-old-time-cartoon-game/

>I didn’t realize for quite a long time that you don’t accomplish anything by jumping on top of an enemy, like in the Mario games. Rather, you lose a life.

>I didn’t realize for quite a long time that you don’t accomplish anything by jumping on top of an enemy, like in the Mario games. Rather, you lose a life.

>I didn’t realize for quite a long time that you don’t accomplish anything by jumping on top of an enemy, like in the Mario games. Rather, you lose a life.

HAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAAHAHHAHAHAHAH

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>>389053661

Damn ya faggy as nigga what the fuck is your problem?

Are you really fucking going all wah wah about nerds who suck or stupid pandering and catering to other nerds just like him?

Like god damn why are modern day nerds who immature and incapable to self moderate and just ignore shit that does not pander an cater to them? Like shit son ignore this bullshit. Like shit man really? you really are going to cry about shit not in any way meant for your just simply out of some sort of self centered selfishness instead wanting shit to pander and cater to you?

Like shit faggots go find something to positively enjoy instead of reveling in faggy ass recreational anger for gods sakes you fucking heathen retards.


I swear in this day and age so many people would rather find stuff that makes them frown instead of putting any sort of effort to find stuff they can genuinely enjoy with a happy smile.

>>389054935
This is why Trump won. More and more people are realizing this post is the truth.

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>>389066828
>getting mad at people getting mad

>>389066686
SHit, that's brutal

>>389066769
The retarded thing is that last part is not even true, really. You take damage. I don't think he ever quite figured out the HP system.

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>>389066686

>>389061584
>Not a reviewer of platformers
The only way you could be THAT bad is if you'd never so much as touched a platformer in your life, and platformers are basically required listening for anyone who plays videogames. Hell, I'll bet less than 1% of all people who browse /v/ haven't played a platformer, because platformers are usually the first games you ever play, and if not, they're the first games you ever beat.
That journo is just THAT bad at games.

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>>389067123

>>389057762
If the comments on the video are correct, he was actually trying. The video was called "Cuphead this game is not easy" before, but they switched it to the current title since people made fun of him too much.

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>>389067225
Physical castle model used in the Dragon bosses stage

>>389053661
If someone said this was a 6 year old kid or someone with downs syndrome playing I would definitely believe it.

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>>389053661
>Stuck right at the begining of the first level for almost 30 minutes

Cmon now

>>389058120
yes, a real measurement you fat american twat

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>>389057417
Why is the air dash on Y instead on one of the bumpers?

>>389067630
That type of retarded button layout first reared its ugly head in Mega Man X and devs have kept making the same poor decision for ages. Dash on R makes so much more sense.

>>389066224
That's why I roll my eyes every time I see a "Cure for Cancer finally found" article in a "reputable" news outlet

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To be fair, the description does say this. So they know the guy playing had a bad day. They're not trying to pass it off as "This game is shit" like so many people here are trying to claim.

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>>389067341
Prototypes for Cuphead
1/5

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>>389068120
2/5