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Future Boxer, Part 5
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Oh shit nigger, you're a mutant eagle-man boxer that's also a cyborg, and your name is Timothy.

You're preparing for your next match.
What do you do?

Previous threads:
http://pastebin.com/sR3G3F2A
https://www.mediafire.com/folder/ici3zlnn9ytyy/ADVENTURES
>>
>>324107302
Punch self in face.

Who's our next match?
>>
https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=9McGKrxOnB8
>>
>>324107302

LAST TIME ON FUTURE BOXING

VAMPS ARE JERKS AND TRIED TO CHEAT
THE SPIDER STOLE YOUR WIFE
YOUR SON JOINED THE MOB
YOU WENT TO JAIL AND ARE NOW FREE
NOW ITS TIME TO FIGHT FOR YOUR WIFE AND SON BACK
*DING DING DING*
>>
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>>324107363
As you punch yourself in the face you consider who to fight next
>>
>>324107480
That weird thing at the bottom
>>
>>324107480
>>324107401
>>
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>>324107614
Oh, that's the Rookie Champ, you can't fight him until you've beaten the other guys
>>
>>324107690
Spider, also how is our son doing in the mafia?
>>
>>324107690
Spider
There's only room for one animal-mutant in this league
>>
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>>324107773
>implying there won't be more animal-mutants in the higher tiers
>implying you can even reach those
>>
>>324107982
Check on son
>>
>>324107982
Fuck you Spider, you're not even the final boss of the fucking rookie league. You don't deserve to talk shit
>>
>>324107982
SCREEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEE
>>
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>>324108039
"Oh hey, sup?" Asked the skeleton mobster who's teaching your son to open safes
>>
>>324108458

Ghost Jew out of no where!
>>
>>324108458
Will my son get a starring role in Villain Adventure 2?
>>
>>324108458
caw to son
>>
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>>324108538
"Depends. Do you have a time machine? Because canonically Villain Adventure 2 is set before Future Boxer"
>>
>>324108501
>>324108751
>>
>>324108751
I'm sure you guys could steal one.
>>
>>324108751
How about VA3?
>>
>>324108751
where can i get a time machine?
>>
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>>324108836
"Nice idea. noted"
>>
>>324109087
do you even know what that means?
>>
>>324109087
All of a sudden a filler arc approaches
>>
>>324109087
Check the safe, is it your hopes and dreams of winning the boxing belt?
>>
>>324109087
>>324108781
I want jews they can help
>>
>>324109087
This is getting too meta, donchu think?
>>
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>>324109156
Beep Beep Beep, your built in phone just got a new message.

Your wife requires alimony
>>
>>324109420
>>
>>324109420
JUST
>>
>>324109420
Refuse.
Plot resolved.
>>
>>324107302
ban
>>
>>324109420
tell wife to get a job lazy bitch
>>
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>>324109468
"Ayyy someone wants a haircut?" asked suddenly appearing robot barber
>>
>>324109692
>>324109182
>>
>>324109692
tell him you want dat alimony haircut
>>
>>324109692
yeah! I want a drill pompador hair cut
>>
>>324109692
Laser-eye the barber and chuck your phone at the mafia-skeleton. He can handle it.
>>
>>324109692
One Punch Man my shit up
>>
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>>324109798
"Yes, hello? Sorry, Tim is busy right now, can you leave a message?"
>>
>>324110116
>>324109767
>>
>>324110116
This is no alimony, its a trick by the vampires
>>
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>>324110159
>>
These threads are fucking stupid.
>>
>>324110396
>>324110242
>>
>>324110396
Oh shit what do you want!
>>
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>>324110396
mean while Tim is ranting about mgsv on the internet
>>324110421
your stupid
>>
>>324110487
and I mean that in the posessive sense too!
>>
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>>324110487
It's been years, but you're still mad and random people on the internet will know how mad you are, goddamnit.
>>
>>324110683
We come across this exact thread while browsing a future internet image board.
>>
>>324110683
"it was bullshit! trying to save quiet and these fucking tanks are bullshit too!"
then anon says git gud
>>
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>>324110786
>>
>>324110926
Woah are you in the future op? cuz we got an hour left here
>>
>>324110926
Power outage
>>
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>>324111048
Damnit, and you jsut finished writing a savage reply that will surely leave anons crying in a corner due to how great it is too
>>
>>324111125
look outside
>>
>>324111125
Go outside
>>
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>>324111189
>>
>>324111352
Jew ghost gives you a winning strategy
>>
>>324111352
Remove painting and see what really is outside.
>>
>>324111352
blow out his invisible tires
>>
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>>324111418
You missed, his car is too fast
>>
>>324111627
go in hot pursuit
>>
>>324111627
fuck it let's beat him up next match
which happens right now!
>>
>>324111627
Cramp
>>
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>>324111687
But the power's out! You can't turn on your PC to play Hot Pursuit.
>>
>>324111818
>>324111762
>>
>>324111818
no, no, your eyes are just closed
>>
>>324111818
power it with your laser eyes
>>
>>324111818
Never fear the Jew is here
>>
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>>324111874
Oh no! Your Eye Beams were too powerful! You wrecked your PC!
>>
>>324112062
welp, better go earn some money
>>
>>324112062
Options?
also jew
>>
>>324112062
Fire eye lasers in random directions
>>
>>324112062
go battle the spider while mourning all the shitposting you can't do now
>>
>>324112062
to the fights then
>>
>>324112062
cut a hole in the ceiling for light
>>
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>>324112117
You don't say
>>
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>>324112117
And the only way you know how is to win! So who will be your next opponent?
>>
>>324112279
Spider lock in confirm
>>
>>324112279
2 for 1 special!
>>
>>324112279
spider let's fuck him up
>>
>>324112279
spider, let's have the rematch or something
>>
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>>324112346
And so you get ready for your match.

Your coach has some tips:
"That guy can't fly! So use that to your advantage, but watch out for them webs! He'll try to piss you off with taunts relating to your ex-wife, try to not let that get to you"
>>
>>324112707
what about leprosy?
>>
>>324112707
Yea nah fuck that noise.
>>
>>324112707
but he flew last match
>>
>>324112707
HOW DARE SPIDER BRING UP MY EX-WIFE!
>>
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>>324112769
"You're a mutant cyborg, why do you care?"
>>
>>324112984
it's a phobia ok fuck you!
>>
>>324112984
Jew whispers doubts in your ear
>>
>>324113049
>get vaccinations like a good goy
>>
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>>324113049
"You will never win against the spider...UNLESS YOU BUY THE EXCLUSIVE "UNFAIR ADVANTAGE" DLC! PRE ORDER NOW! ONLY $999.9! AND YOU'LL GET THE EXCLUSIVE BONUS "ACCESSORIES PACK" FOR FREE! Also take your vaccinations like a good goy, goy"
>>
>>324113309
next fight get pumped
>>
>>324113309
Well, he makes a good argument. Better pre-order.
>>
>>324113309
Sic Space Hitler on the Jew and start your entrance
>>
Can we trust him?
>>
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>>324113429
Do you want to change anything regarding to your entrance? Liek theme or entrance style?
>>
>>324113638
naw
>>
>>324113638
I want my entrance music to be "the itsty bitsy spider"
>>
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>>324113689
And so you flin tinto the ring, spreading embers from peacock feathers while "Im a Real American" plays loudly over the speakers
>>
>>324113937
Get caught in a spider web
>>
>>324113937
Shed a tear as you remember freedom
>>
>>324113937
The spider reveals his true form, an eight-legged jew!
>>
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>>324113959
Shieet
>>
>>324114221
but your embers burn you free
>>
>>324114221
Use power of FREEDOM!
>>
>>324114221
Spider begins his entrance
>>
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>>324114296
The Spider is carried to the ring by Giant Spiders while a weird remix of the Spiderman theme plays
>>
>>324114534
trips
>>
>>324114534
asshole that's an American spider! you piece of filth! burn with white hot rage!
>>
>>324114534
The audience goes fucking insane upon his arrival
>>
>>324114534
Spiders are LAAAAAAAAAAME
>>
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>>324114578
And thanks to his cyber enhancement: an internet browser, he can freely shitpost while fighting, and he just got trips on Spiderchan
>>
>>324114737
>>324114604
>>
>>324114737
Why hasn't a health inspector closed down the ring yet? It's far too unsanitary. I mean spiders are crawling all over the place.
Get the bug spray.
>>
>>324114591
>>324114737
>>
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>>324114829
MEANWHILE

"Here, Mr Health Inpsector, I'm just gonna leave this comically large sack of money with a dollar sign on it in front of you and return to the completely clean ring that is definitely not full of spiders"
>>
>>324115145
Smear the money over your face, venom snake style
>>
]>>324115145
The Spider starts blasting Tim with Shitposts.
>>
>>324115145
Can we get mafia skeleton to put a hit out on the spider?
>>
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>>324115209
>he still pays alimony
>his wife left him because he can't pleasure her
>he still has to look after their son
>he will never win the championship belt
>he has to become a cyborg to compensate for his shitty skills
>he's an oversized chicken
>he thinks freedom is real
>mfw I will never ever be Timothy

who keeps sending these into your cyber brain
>>
>>324115424
Tim remains stoic, but it hurts
>>
>>324115424
Accept them as truth then cry oil
>>
>>324115424
try punching him
>>
>>324115424
round 1 -ding-
you launch into flight in the air shooting lazers at spider
>>
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>>324115509
>>
>>324115424
"At least I'm not Anthony Burch"
>>
>>324115519
>>324115592
>>
>>324115592
Cave his face in out of rage
>>
>>324115592
Jews backs and watches ominously as it all goes according to plan
>>
>>324115592
Your tears lubricate your escape from the spiderweb
>>
>>324115592
"At least i'm not a black furry"
>>
>>324115592
>>324115608
>>
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>>324115628
The Spider swiftly dodges your attacks
>>
>>324115654
>>324115870
>>
>>324115870
INSTANTLY VAPORIZE THE SPIDER'S DICK
>>
>>324115870
Spider shoots webs at Timothy, from his ass.
>>
>>324115870
Show the spider what happens when presented with str vs dex
>>
>>324115870
he doesn't have spider sense he's not radioactive you know
>>
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>>324115901
[Evil Jew noises]
>>
>>324116057
Space Hitler starts choking him
>>
>>324116057
Just fucking throw a punch or something. It's just a spider.
>>
>>324116057
punch spider from the sky
>>
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>>324116117
>>
>>324116262
Help me! remember the 6 million spirits goy. Ignore that spiders who's definitely not about to sneak attack you!
>>
>>324116262
Starts shaking the shekels out of him while still choking
>>
>>324116262
>>324116164
then stomp on him with extendo feet
>>
>>324116309
Ghost shekles?
>>
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>>324116309
>>
>>324116402
Ghost shekles.
>>
>>324116490
Oh fuck jew ghost can't loose shekles! Jew ghost rage!!!!
>>
>>324116490
MEANWHILE BACK IN THE RING
>>
>>324116490
More.
>>
>>324116490
Back to the fight, where Spider has gained the upperhands
>>
>>324116490
use your internet browser to tell these anons to focus on the fight
>>
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>>324116490
Greydude?
Suncat?
Marshall?
>>
stop with the jew ghost shit, it stopped being entertaining a long time ago. there's a fight to win so get to it goys
>>
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>>324116559

>>324116576
wat
>>
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>>324116716
drawfag name?
>>
>>324116716
SHAKE HIM MORE
>>
WHAT IS HAPPENING
>>
>>324116716
>>324116570
>>
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>>324116781

>>324116760
Oh, I'm none of those guys then. I'm just not a paladin
>>
>>324116953
Spider ties your arms to your body with web
>>
>>324116953
Cheep shot while distracted spider
>>
>>324116953
how have we not scree'd yet in this thread
scree in that fuckers ears, spiders have like 16 ears don't they?
>>
>>324116716
>>324116953
how the hell are you able to draw things in less than 5 minutes?
>>
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>>324117043
"Actually, spiders d---[SCREEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEE]
>>
>>324117213
It was spiderman all along
>>
>>324117213
LOUDER
>>
>>324117207
The power of FREEDOM.
>>
>>324117213
'ow'
>>
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>>324117263
NOw even the audience is affected
>>
>>324117213
harder that it blasts him to the ropes only to bounce back in to our 6 piston ouch fist
>>
>>324117383
>>324117394
>>
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>>324117463
"lmao you had to copy me and my multiple arms to stand a chance. Nice originality faget"
>>
Paladin-San I'm very high right and when I read the audience was affected. I heard it. Wierd...>>324117695
>>
>>324117695
again
>>
>>324117695
Spider flies back into the ropes and rebounds into another punch
>>
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>>324117764
"The same move won't work twice in a row!"

He counters with a triple uppercut
>>
>>324117982
You think that health inspector is living a good life?
>>
>>324117982
Fucker that tits ain't fit junk nigga.

jew
>>
>>324117982
counter with a downercut
>>
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>>324118028
"what"
>>
>>324118036
he's distracted>>324118036
>>
>>324118126
Weed dude. Now tv fight
>>
>>324118126
Quick, while he's distracted: commence counter-shit posting
>>
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>>324118185
You start to throw some implications at him

"Pffft, like a care what an eaglefag has to say"
>>
>>324118319
Any mods in the stadium to banham that spider?
>>
>>324118319
Grotch punch for freedom of expression
>>
>>324118319
>>324118159
>>
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>>324118379
MEANWHILE

"Here, Mr Mod, I'm just gonna leave this comically large sack of hotpockets with a Hotpockets logo on it in front of you and return to the completely legal ring that is definitely not full of rulebreaking spiders"
>>
>>324118574
Time skip
>>
>>324118450
>>324118574
>>
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>>324118615
>>
>>324118713
it's the last round

cue the hot mutant ring girl
>>
>>324118713
rewind go back the Comercial is over
>>
>>324118713
CROSS COUNTER
>>
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>>324118738
>>
>>324118930
Spider shoots a web at us and swings us into the stage light
>>
>>324118930
Finishing blow. KO
>>
>>324118930
speak with your coach
>>
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>>324118930
Any advice, Doc?
>>
>>324118713
Please, some one who is not mobile right now please safe this thread for fucks sake!
Most entertaining thread without rageplebs since months
>>
>>324118930
>324118930
pep talk from your coach
>>
>>324118930
Spider taunts
>>
>>324119002
If only these were the days when we still had to vote for which threads got archives.
>>
>>324119002
>>324119252
NaP archives his thrreads himself
http://pastebin.com/sR3G3F2A
>>
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>>324118965
Yes, time for the finishing blow, the final punch, the deciding attack after a grueling series of rounds that left both of you battered and only with one arm left each

>>324119002
I save all the threads myself
also,
>rageplebs
wut

And the fuck is up with all these connection errors I'm getting
>>
>>324119509
do a fake, spider makes a last attempt and hook him
>>
>>324119509
CROSS COUNTER
>>
>>324119509
Your wife appears. With Sssteve.
>>
>>324119509
remember the bloody battle
>>
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>>324119596
Will this finally take The Spider down?
>>
>>324119835
You hear a sickening snap as your punch connects with the Spider's mandibles.

Your hand just broke, didn't it.
>>
>>324119835
It already did. Spiders been dead for a while yo
>>
>>324119835
it does and spider is now your bitch, tea bag victory
>>
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>>324119906
>>
>>324120065
Americans don't drink tea!
COLA VICTORY!
>>
celebrate victory with MOUNTAIN DEW instead
>>
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>>324120150
>>
>>324120065
mountain dew victory
>>
>>324120065
Rewind back to punch moment.
It appears that you have been daydreaming.
>>
>>324120287
Chug that shit.
>>
>>324120287
Jew rage kills spider. Next fight
>>
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>>324120319
[I'm A Real American plays triumphantly while you bask in the cheers of fans]
>>
INTERLUDE TIME
>>
>>324120505
acquire groupies
>>
>>324120505
Dew dew dew dew dew
COMMERCIAL BREAK
>>
>>324120505
Get a prophetic vision of a man in a cloak crushing the skull of that mobster you have a love hate relationship with
>>
>>324120505
Spider wakes up after the count is over and gives you a manly handshake with his remaining arm. You're not as shit as he thought, eaglefag.
>>
>>324120505
watch spider crawl on the ground like a bitch
>>
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>>324120545
Aw shit, you got some chicks
>>
>>324120684
interview time
>>
>>324120684
>>324119665
>>
>>324120684
Do >>324120574
>>
>>324120684
>>324120574
>>
>>324120684
>>324120562
>>
>>324120684
snuggle and watch spider be booed and humiliated and watch our ex wife walk away in a huff
>>
LEVEL UP
>>
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>>324120749
[Front Page Material]
>>
>>324120917
Your arm malfunctions and accidentally rips off Spider's arm, then accidentally beats him to death with it
>>
>>324120917
CROSS COUNTER
>>
>>324120917
Collect winnings. Proceed to blow most of them on a post-match bar binge with Spider.
>>
>>324120917
your ex wife leaves in a huff, she breaks up with spider
>>
>>324120917

EXCUTE HIM

>Booming dark voice echoes in the distance
>>
>>324119329
Awesome.
Thanks
>>
>>324120917
FF to the part where you get a telegram from Spider claiming that he wants a rematch.
>>
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>>324120978
[Second Page Material]
>>
>>324119509
>rageplebs
Normally only getting fun out from this board by gore threads and/or making dumb people rage about the content and/or fallibg to obvious 8/8 b8.
So they rage around in the threada like the autism they celebrate in lowkey.
>rage
>plebs
>>rageplebs

Have to admit i skipped a lot of these threads cause not in interest range.
Looks like theyre allright though.
>>
>>324121335
>>324120992
>>
>>324121335
3rd page ex wife is a slut
>>
>>324121335

Falcon Punch him sending him flying to the next kingdom
>>
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>>324121425
[Front Page Material of some tabloid and blog]
>>
>>324121654
Do >>324121264
>>
>>324121654
>>324120562
>>
>>324121654
Do something not linked to another post
>>
>>324121498
>>324121654
>>
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>>324121715
>>
>>324121807
now do something else
>>
>>324121807
Level UP
>>
>>324121807
>>324121853
>>
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>>324121869
>>
>>324121915

ALL POINTS IN LUCK

WERE GOING TO VEGAS BABY
>>
>>324121915
Everything into INT. Gain magikz.
>>
>>324121915
1 in str
1 in dex
1 in end
1 in int
1 in cha
>>
>>324121915
All in END
>>
>>324121915
All to CHA.
>>
>>324121915
Meanwhile 15 minutes ago....
>>
>>324121915
all in luk Lock in
>>
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>>324121959
Ya sure m8
>>
>>324122046
>>324121956
>>
>>324122046
nah put in luk Lock in
>>
>>324122046
DOES IT LOOK LIKE I'M NOT SURE NIGGA?
>>
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>>324122068
Ya suuuure?
>>
>>324122046

Luck


and then become jinxed
>>
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First thread ever anon here.

Keep on truckin', drawbro.
>>
>>324122189
Perfect
>>
>>324122189
>>324121951
>>
>>324122189
Hey boss, tell us what these stats stand for. Always wanted to know.
>>
>>324122189
luk Lock in
>>
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>>324122227
Ya suuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuure?
>>
>>324122339
END
>>
>>324122339
nah luk magic luk... lock in
>>
>>324122241

Strength
Dexterity
Endurance
Intelligence
Charisma
Lukewarm
>>
>>324122339
yeah let's go on now
>>
>>324122339
Absolutely. Confirm, get magikz.
>>
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>>324122397
YOu feel slightly smarter
>>
>>324122485
get some intel for the next fight
>>
>>324122485

Grow hair
>>
>>324122485
Good.
Let's put our new brain to use now.
>>
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>>324122529
And so you planted some hair seeds. Don't forget to water them everyday!
>>
>>324122634
BREAKING NEWS: Rookie league boxer, Fred, has killed himself in his apartment today! Let's look at the scene
>>
>>324122634

Book a new fight after you water your plants.
>>
>>324122634

Time to get started training a new skill.
>>
Replace broken arm with a metroid style hand canon that shoots hot tamales, oh and by hot I mean at least 20,000C
>>
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>>324122705
"What skill do you want to learn?" Asked you good ol' Doc [REDACTED]
>>
>>324122835

Punching a hole in reality.
>>
>>324122835
Rust Hurricane
>>
>>324122835
the scree punch. Turning our screes into a sound punch
>>
>>324122835
Landscape painting.
>>
>>324122835
Rocket punch
>>
>>324122835
Basic calculus.
>>
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>>324122939
"Very well, first, I need you to stand where you are, don't move and start screeing at that punching bag for 10 hours."
>>
>>324123074
Do so
>>
>>324123074
Uhh, let's learn Star and Stripe Punch
>>
>>324123074

Scree at the doc for 10 hours
>>
>>324123074
>10 hours
Too much bullshit.
Change coach.
>>
>>324123074
Learn >>324122968 instead.
>>
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>>324123129
"Already giving up? So you don't weant to turn your screeing into punches afterall"
>>
Hot tamale hand canon that comes with two abilities: Standard fire which shoots a hot tamale at 20,000C, Raidiated shot which shoots a hot tamale at 2,000,000C temporarily giving the opponent cancer
>>
>>324123221
Let's learn>>324123114 instead
>>
>>324123221
[Jojo-like artstyle] Your next like is going to be "Quitter!"
>>
>>324123221
Scree for 24 hours to get scree punch [+1]
>>
>>324123221
no do it, lock in 10 hrs but we fast forward
>>
>>324123221
Yeah. You are fired.
>>
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>>324123325
"Wuss"
>>
>>324123559

Work on that trick for 10 hours instead.
>>
>>324123559
Stand your ground proudly
>>
Instead learn Hot tamale hand canon that comes with two abilities: Standard fire which shoots a hot tamale at 20,000C, Raidiated shot which shoots a hot tamale at 2,000,000C temporarily giving the opponent cancer
>>
>>324123559
go scree at the bag for 10 hours
>>
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>>324123625
And so you did. YOu sat in a corner and tried to guess what people are going to say before they say it, for 10 hours
>>
>>324123767
Did we get wife back?
>>
>>324123767
Try it on our new master with "Are you going to stop wasting my time?"
>>
>>324123767
now do that 10 scree punch for ten hours
>>
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>>324123849
And so you screeeeee'd at the punching bag for 10 hours. At the final 10th hour you haven been able to push the bag back, not as a punch yet, but it's progress.
>>
>>324123993
your beak needs to make a popping noise that'd where the pow from the punch comes from stupid
>>
>>324123993

We need to learn the legendary Falcon Punch

go on a great journey to find the secluded Falcon Punch master
>>
>>324123993
Sonic Punch soon?
>>
>>324123993

Combine your two new skills.
>>
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>>324124094
"Sure, but first, the Scree Punch, now that you've trained your Screeing enough, to use this skill jsut pull your head back like so then launch forward and screeee"
>>
>>324124347
THANKS MAZINCOACH
>>
>>324124347
holy shit it worked! Now to find out who our next opponent is!
>>
>>324124347

His next words will be "Good job, now lets go get some drinks."
>>
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>>324124383
"Good job, now lets go get some drinks."
>>
>>324124519
drink fireball so you can do fire ball scree punches
>>
>>324124519

No
he must walk into the sunset to find the legendary Falcon Puch master

its the ultimate finisher move
>>
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>>324124625
>>
>>324124737

Woah careful. Your core might overheat.
>>
>>324124737
>>324122664
>>
>>324124737
well I asked for that...
do we still have our old parts? or is it upgrade time?
>>
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>>324124817
"Seems like he hanged himself, inside this locked room with no witnesses"
>>
>>324124965

Eat him to get his powers.
>>
>>324124965

Wait a minute! This wasn't a suicide. It was murder!?! - Detective Bob
>>
>>324124965
here that kid you are the rookie champ!
>>
>>324124965
Take a look at his suicide note
>>
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>>324125000
As you watch the news report, you decided you should eat him to gain his powers
>>
>>324125084
now back to animal planet
>>
>>324125084
The cops search Fred's apartment for shit to steal
>>
>>324125084
Check if the fridge is empty. We could do some groceries since we're going out.
>>
>>324125084
The heart for courage, the brain for intelligence and the blood for strenght.
Go now.
>>
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>>324125169
YOur fridge has:
- A bowl of birdseed
- A carton of milk
- A Huge jar of Mayonaise
>>
>>324125278

Eat it all.
>>
>>324125278
Bring the Mayonaise, could put it on Fred while you eat him.
>>
>>324125278
Time to go to Fred's place
>>
>>324125278
>>324125324
do this but bring junior along its time for father son time
>>
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>>324125324
"Oh hey, where are you going? You wife just came by asking for alimony, again. I told her you had diarrhea so you couldn't meet her today"
>>
>>324125446
fine I'll take her with me to Fred dinner.
>>
>>324125446
ignore the withered man
>>
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>>324125539
"aww"
>>
>>324125643
Bring junior and the Mayonaise to Fred's house
>>
>>324125643
ok take him with you and your ex to Fred dinner
>>
>>324125643
"I'm sorry dude, I've gotta a corpse to eat. Wann come along?"
>>
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>>324125708
"Yea?"
>>
>>324125753
To the Eaglemobile!
>>
>>324125753
yea
>>
>>324125753

Too bad, fuck you!
>>
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>>324125794
YEA!
>>
>>324125887
go eat that fred! take your ex along to discuss alimony
>>
>>324125887
Jump in your car and drive down the coastal highway with wind in your beak and etc
>>
>>324125887
pay the alimony
>>
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>>324125949
"Oh her? She already left, said something about going out with a mutant octopus or something, also said she'll be back to colect tomorrow"
>>
>>324126183
just you and me Withered one. let's eat that fred!
>>
>>324126183
meh, tentacles and women never mix too well.
Let's go withered man.
>>
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>>324126258
MEANWHILE, AT THE CRIME SCENE

"Oh hey, this must be a suicide note"
>>
>>324126183

Contemplate eating your ex to gain her powers while you go to freds.
>>
>>324126361
it reads "help I'm being murdered!"
>>
>>324126361
Wipe the cheetos fingers on the police uniform.
>>
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>>324126442
"What does this mean? Better send it back to the lab"
>>
>>324126563
the police leave and you and withered man go in to eat your meal. when you make a shocking discovery!
>>
>>324126563
Move your thumb.
>>
>>324126563

One of the cops is corrupt and destroys evidence.
>>
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>>324126642
THE BODY'S GONE!
>>
>>324126746
As you approach Fred's place, the withered man looms behind you ominously. I hope he wasn't secretly the murderer.
>>
>>324126746
damn it ! I wad hoping it tasted murdery
not missingly
>>
>>324126746
police comes back and believes you stole the corpse
>>
>>324126746
Ask withered man to take the body's place. Maybe it'll help us solve the mystery.
>>
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>>324126818
>>
>>324126746
All that mayonnaise for nothing.
>>
>>324126957
throw the mayo at him
>>
>>324126957
Since we're hungry, we might just eat the mayo.
>>
>>324126957
Neck snap
>>
>>324126957
You sense an evil attack and dive out of the way!
>>
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>>324127095
I don't know how this would help but okay
>>
>>324127264
Self-destruct
>>
>>324127264
So you can turn your head 180 TO DODGE THAT ATTACK HE IS ABOUT TO GIVE YOU
>>
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>>324127329
>>
>>324127420
wake up from daydreaming after you Decided you were going to eat fred
>>
>>324127420

Reform into NEO Future Boxer
>>
>>324127420
Game over
>>
>>324127420
You are awoken from your daydream by the old man creeping up behind you with a cyber knife
>>
>>324127420
>>324127534
>>
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>>324127476
Man, this keeps happening lately, what gives?
>>
>>324127586
Welp go eat fred
>>
>>324127586
Withered man doesn't want to stop existing and finds a way to escape the daydream.
>>
>>324127586
No more daydreaming. From now on, everything that happens happens.
>>
>>324127586
WATCH OUT SURPRISE ATTACK
>>
>>324127643
then don't game over the game
>>
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>>324127618
OH MY GOD, THE BODY IS GONE
>>
>>324127740
All that mayonnaise for nothing.
Right, withered man?
>>
>>324127740
oh it just fell on the ground
>>
>>324127740
Shit the police are coming back. Hide!
>>
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>>324127827
OH MY GOD THE GROUND IS GONE
>>
>>324127887

Fly into a frenzy searching for your meal.
>>
>>324127887
The background turns into space
>>
>>324127887
wow what a crafty murderer, we know because murderers leave no ground to be traced by
>>
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>>324127974
>>
>>324128041
save just incase of any random explosions were to happen
>>
>>324128041
The police probably took it.

Quickly, to the morgue.
>>
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>>324128129
>>
>>324128181
Tug on the rope.
>>
>>324128181
Let's cut to the Council of Boxers
>>
>>324128181

Enter the ZONE to locate the body.
>>
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>>324128292
"Alright, first things first, what are we having for dinner?"
>>
>>324128427
Chinamen
>>
>>324128427
Us.
>>
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>>324128469
"For the last time, Bob, we're not eating chinamen"
>>
>>324128427
Some random explosions.
Damn I love spicy food.
>>
>>324128621
>>324128627
>>
>>324128621
Aw fuck you man
>>
>>324128621
Bring up all of these boxers Megaman stage selection style
>>
>>324128621
And on this note, Council of Boxers ends.
>>
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>>324128698
The council of Boxers are made up of high-tier boxers, you're still a rookie, not even low-tier to even look at them
>>
>>324128805
Use your mafia connections to worm your way in high-tier boxing.
>>
>>324128805
Use your mafia connections to get a glimpse of who these boxers are

megaman stage selection style
>>
>>324128805
What are our upgrades?
>>
>>324128805
>>324128676
>>
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>>324128892
"Right, are you sure you wanna skip straight into the high tier? Not gonna slowly climb to the top from the bottom huh? You vanna strap a rocket to yourself and launch right to the top"
>>
>>324129074
fuck you nigga, put me straight up as champion, I ain't fighting no boxers.
Make me champion NAO
>>
>>324129074
Isn't that what Rocky did? I'm sure he did that.
>>
>>324129074
I'm scared by high speed travel
>>
>>324129074
Yeah, we'll beat the low-tiers afterwards.
>>
>>324129074
Nah fuck that, I just want to see what they look like. Megaman stage selection screen style, of course
>>
>>324129074
naw let's look at our mid teir fights
>>
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>>324129197
And so you rapidly climbed into being the champ. Due to the fact that all your opponents met mysterious accidents right before your fights, amking you the winner by default.
>>
>>324129490
The Rainbow Man bursts from the ground and calls bullshit
>>
>>324129490
Level up for winning by default?
>>
>>324129490
Let's brag about being a champ to the crowd until one of high-tiers throws us a challenge.
>>
>>324129490
Weirdly, the "accidents" were all in the same place.
>>
>>324129490
Hooray, we are the champions.
Watch credits, save game, pick a new character or go in NG+.
>>
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>>324129608
"Sir, what do The Champ think about this strange fact?"

"Timothy is very busy and cannot answer right now, but I assure you he sympathizes with the losers--ahem--opponents very much and wishes them a fast recovery and hopes the mysterious accidents can be solved soon"

"All the accidents involve the boxers having a fist-sized hole through their head"

"Then maybe they shouldn't have accidentally fallen onto my fist, hehe---I uh mean, Timothy deeply regrets he couldn't fight them and wishes them a fast recovery"
>>
>>324129868
The reporter is our next high-tier opponent.
>>
>>324129868
Camera snaps to recovering boxers.
>>
>>324129868
Your next match is Lolisniffer himself
>>
>>324129868
Fred comes back as a zombie to challenge you
>>
>>324129868
A withered old man in the crowd calls bullshit
>>
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>>324129936
"And why are you here interviewing us anyway? Shouldn't you be getting ready for the fight?"

"Oh I'm actually a reporter, boxing is my side-job"
>>
>>324130082
All of a sudden we have a prophetic vision of our demise
>>
>>324130082
>>324129956
>>
>>324130082

Eat the microphone. Your hunger for that corpse hasn't been sated yet.
>>
>>324130082
Reporter starts making connections between the accidents and looks suspiciously at us.
>>
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>>324130161
Maybe jumping straight into high-tier without gaining experience from beating the other tiers was a bad idea
>>
>>324130406
Shit. We have to find some way we can undo this mistake
>>
>>324130406
Good thing jumping straight into high-tier was also a daydream.

Time to fight gunface.
>>
>>324130406
Make an excuse to postpone the match to train more
>>
>>324130406
Load game.
>>
>>324130406
Rank yourself down. You misjudged the situation.
>>
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>>324130518
"HEY! Where are you going?!"

"Timothy is tired and need to rest to prepare for his match against you, being the champ is tiring work and in order to give the fans a match worth watching, he needs to be in his top form! And to do that needs a rest. Preferably for a few weeks, or months. No more comments"

"But the match is tonight"

"Patience is a virtue"

"what"

"No more comments"
>>
>>324130809
Meanwhile, a random Rainbow Worm embarks on an epic journey
>>
>>324130809
Burn your midnight fuel, train hard, pray to all mecha gods you know and hope your opponents malfunctions or straight up explodes.
>>
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>>324130854
"Go my son...avenge me....defeat the evil skeleton....to restore our family name....."
>>
>>324131136
And don't get eaten by people who mistake you for a candy
>>
>>324131136
Get son and supplies and embark on an epic journey
>>
>>324131136
Dad, I'm over here. Why are you talking to a gummy worm?
>>
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>>324131256
"Shut up, Rainbow Son. Can't a man be delirious due to getting his asked kicked by a skeleton in peace? Gimme a break here"

"Dad, pls"
>>
>>324131430

Tell dad you have been dating a monochrome girl.
>>
>>324131430
Better save the game in case something goes horribly wrong

And copy the save into another folder
>>
>>324131430
Flick the gummy worm into the outside world to send it on its journey
>>
>>324131430
Bird guy start a epic training journey himself. With lots of twists and backstory
>>
>>324131515
and save it on a floppy disk. Just in case.
>>
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>>324131537
"LOOK! CAN YOU FEEL THAT?! THAT SKELETON HAD A BOXER OF HIS OWN! AND HE'S GOING ON AN EPIC TRAINING JOURNEY! WITH LOTS OF TWISTS AND BACKSTORY! SURE WISH I COULD SEE IT! IF ONLY TO MOTIVATE YOU TO DO THE SAME!"

"Dad, you're talking weird again"

"JUST GO AND BEAT UP THE SKELETON SO I CAN SLEEP AT NIGHT DAMNIT"

"Now you're just being silly"
>>
>>324131676
>>324131515
>>324131615
>>
>>324131676
Save game, make 1000 backups on every possible device you have.
>>
>>324131676
How old is Rainbow Man? He was in the last adventure and that took place six gorillian years ago
>>
>>324131676
Activate hard mode
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>>324131807
He's six gorrillian+28 years old.
>>
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>>324131713
And so you did

>>324131807
Like the skeletons, he maybe a supernatural entity that is six gorillian+ years old.

Or that could just be his ancestor
>>
>>324131921
And remember: don't copy that floppy!
>>