4am thread

Oh no
not me

>4:00:00
well done OP

absolutely. lol
send help
peaces

WHO NEET HERE?

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>>962271
>Tfw work in 8 hours.
>Corporate is coming in.
>3am
Sorry anons. I won't be able to hit 4am with you.

>>962272
>Mfw Blackstar is an amazing sendoff.

I just lost my job three months before I'm supposed to move across the country.

I was talking to my manager about staying within the company when I moved, he asked how soon I'm moving, and I said three months. A week later he brought me in and told me that because the company is downsizing for our department, he's letting me go early, since it would be in their best interest to keep someone around who's going to stay with them.

I absolutely don't know what I'm going to do now. All the money I had saved for the move is now being used just to live. My girlfriend already moved up there, and it sucked that I was stuck here for three months away from her, but now it looks like I'm trapped here. I hate california.

I've been managing to keep up my weights training, play the vidya, eating more healthily and keeping up with work. I think I'm on my way to becoming a normie.

That said, I'm really pissed off with Subnautica at the moment. I finally built a Cyclops and now I can't find a reaper leviathan to piss off, no matter what hilariously dangerous places I go.

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It's 5 AM actually.

Just got done playing more DOOM 2, gonna once again try to not go to sleep so I can fix this terrible sleep schedule.

Probably won't work and I'll continue my cycle of putting off the responsibility of actually giving a shit about my life.

>>962277
Where are you moving to.

Will you have a job to the place you're moving.

How did you get a gf?

>>962276
I haven't listened to it yet. Maybe I'll do that tonight...

I actually gained control
I've got a job teaching for $35 an hour
I have to get up at 6am which is only just later than I would usually go to bed so adjusting to that is hell, but I'm actually having fun teaching and helping kids learn shit

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>>962271

I felt really depressed about bowie's death. One of my personal inspirations in art and music.

My gf(now ex...) acted like a bitch and can't decide between being a nihilist artistic melancholic girl or a party slut.

So I as any man with a pair of balls would do, dumped her ass. But now I'm suffering.

And she's probably sucking Jamal and fucking Tyrone. Or is it the opposite?

I guess I'll play FFVII or Castlevania: SOTN. You hang in there, /v/. I love you all.

>>962282
Nice, I don't think I could ever be a teacher.

>>962271
>lost control
Pretty much but at least I finally got a job

>>962279
>gonna once again try to not go to sleep so I can fix this terrible sleep schedule.
>Probably won't work and I'll continue my cycle of putting off the responsibility of actually giving a shit about my life.
are you me? I can already feel a headache coming on, I won't be able to stay up much longer. I knew that I'd have problems getting my shit together, but I never anticipated this being one of them. It's going to take a lot of hard work but I think this year will be better for me.

please be better

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It's getting pretty late. You should all get some rest soon.

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Playing Grim Dawn, trying to find a mango to read although /wsr/ isn't too terribly helpful, teaching myself maths through khanacademy, needing to spend more time practicing viola, wishing I was better at swing dance, hoping to start graduate school in the fall, and hoping I can start a small job sometime within the next few weeks.
muh blog

>>962283
Relax dude. You dumped her because you weren't happy and didn't see it going anywhere which is the most alpha thing ever.


You're going to make it.

>>962283

You did the right thing anon
who cares what sex she's having, if that's all she cares about she wouldn't have been worthwhile as a partner

>>962288
Graduate school for?

>>962279
Are you me?

>>962288

god damn anime is so fucking stupid

>>962288
What episode of evangelion is that?

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>>962291
M.A. in Applied Experimental Psychology, eventually hoping to get my doctorate in Cognitive Psych, Behavioral Neuroscience, or something similar.

>>962282
I'm the same as you but I make less and my students keep trying to fuck me. Literally. High school girls are such sluts holy shit.

I've gotten a little better at playing blues. But I'm not amazing yet.

>Have you lost control?

Yeah, mostly. Gonna gonna go jack off tho.

>>962277
>at will employment
Gat DANGIT I'm glad I don't live in Burgerclap

>>962295
man anime used to be awesome

>>962295
Cool
Human behavior is so strange to study
I can't imagine what it would be like at that level

>>962296
>and my students keep trying to fuck me. Literally.
Oh poor you! Look everyone, this anon has teenage sluts trying to suck his cock! Let's all give him our kind words and sympathy.

>>962296

My teaching job is casual work for a university to teach high school kids extracurricular stuff, it's only casual work and it's uni funded which is probably why the pay is high

in a real teaching job, how is the pay calculated? Do you only get paid for the hours you spend teaching at school, or do you submit logs of all of your preparation time hours at home too? We get paid for all of the preparation time as well, I have no idea if that's how the real school industry works

>>962280
Wisconsin

I got the gf, ironically, from playing league of legends pre season 1. I was 16 and she was 14, we ended up plating a lot of wow and vindictus and hit it off really well. Our parents would visit back and forth. She moved here for awhile, but California is expensive, and she could go to uni up there for much cheaper. Her education is a lot more important than my tech support and networking certificarions, so I'm moving up there

But now all this shit happened, who knows when I'll be able to move.

>>962302
you've obviously never had a woman be attracted to you before or you'd understand why this would be stressful, especially in anon's particular situation
that pain i've felt, when you wanna and you could but you better sure as fuck not

>tfw depressed for almost a year
>now thinking about working out and getting into shape then picking up boxing
>I can't even force myself to do a few squats
help

>>962271

>Have you lost control?

Yes. 2 months without smoking and now I am on it again.

I am also gaining weight rapidly, think I might have bullemia or tapeworm or something. I get really hungry, and I also eat if I am just bored.

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>>962301
I somehow got lucky if you wanna call it that and became very perceptive so I pick up on things easily and remember specific details about people along with understanding other perspectives (many people believe everybody is the exact same, it's astounding.) Humans are some illogical creatures most of the time. We do some truly odd shit for little rational reason.

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>>962286
>>962292
I am not you Anons.

I'm just a fellow depressed Anon who's trying to turn his life around.

Maybe this will be the night where we stay up all day, go to bed nice and early, then wake up and start the first day of the rest of our lives.

im getting used to this having no control thing

>>962304

Thought for a second that you said you got a gf ironically.

>>962305
You're right, I was just having a chuckle to myself. Sincere best wishes to teacher-anon, I hope your temptation doesn't get the best of you.

>>962302
It's not easy
I like my job and want my students to be successful. The girls who approach me know they are attractive. I usually tell them to come back once they've graduated but it's hard, anon. I want to commit a crime.

>>962311
Yeah my wording is shit without sleep but it does fit.

Sad part is I probably wouldn't have gotten with her if it wasn't for the fact she was a lot better than me at the game and wanted to teach me. She hit Plat season 1 and I was still silver


Now she's a shitter who hates league and is gold at best and I hit Plat 1 promos

>>962313
I'd wait man. You'll bang them either way, one way means that you don't lose your job.

just got done drinking with friends, playing some weirdass boardgame called quelf and playing smash. ate a whole bunch of jack in the box tacos because taco bell was closed for some reason and just released hurricane asstrina. everytime i feel like i have to fart im not sure if itll be liquid solid or gas my ass is a fucking 6th grade science quiz i swear to god i might shit myself tonight on accident wish me luck

>>962313
One of the teachers at the high school I went to just got busted for some shit like that. Pretty upsetting to see it happen to him, he was a nice guy. What's the worst that could happen if you wait until after they graduate their senior year?

>>962317
>What's the worst that could happen if you wait until after they graduate their senior year?
if they graduate, legally nothing
if they haven't depends on the state youre in, in the us anyway

>>962271
I mean I get used to myself at night, it takes that long sometimes. The first thing in the morning I feel sort of undefined, but by midnight you've done all the things you have to do, I mean all the things like meeting people and, you know, and paying bills, and by night those things are done because by then there's nothing you can do about them if they aren't done, so there you are alone and you have the things that matter, after the whole day you can sort of take everything that's happened and go over it alone. I mean I'm never really sure who I am until night, he added.
-William Gaddis, The Recognitions

>>962315
It's hard. I feel pathetic because girls are literally throwing themselves at me. Most won't came back for obvious reasons. I could fuck all the good looking girls and possible go to jail. It just isn't worth it.

>>962317
Technically nothing but even if they graduate I can be in hot shit.

I literally just got done chasing out all these rats in my sisters guest room.

I'm staying there for the week and it was fucked up. Seven rats came running out of the room...kill me

I lost control a long time ago, now I've regained it.

1 year sober, no more drugs or alcohol and I've been a month without medications. It's been hell, but it's been worh it. No more suicidal thoughts, no more depression, I can socialize way better now, no more anxiety, no more voices or weird stuff. I also lost 50 pounds and apparently I'm kinda handsome, 2 girls have asked me out this week. I'm excited about life again, meeting new people and looking forward to starting a new career.

Most importantly videogames are fun again

>>962321
jesus

>>962321
I was nearly shitting myself when I lost a mouse in my room. I'm sorry anon, mice make playing vidya very difficult.

>>962321
To add to that: Chicago is such a shit city to live in. Unless it's in downtown.

>fired from previous job
>felt that stain on my resume would keep me from getting a good job
>broken up about it for a day or so
>immediately hired at security agency
>will have experience related to my law enforcement career

When life is shit, it usually gets better.

>>962322
what's your secret?

>>962322
Good for you anon!

>>962326

Security agencies are literally made for people fired from law enforcement or the army. Didnt you know that?

>>962327
motivation and resolve

>>962329
But I wasn't fired from law enforcement or the army. I had a shit restaurant job before this

>>962317

Where do you live? Im curious if I know the teacher you are talking about.

>>962331

Why did you get fired?

>>962332
Chicagoland area

I know this is going to likely just get me flak, but does anyone here know if an English Lit degree is honestly worth anything? I wanted to do Comp Sci but failed calc a few years back and now retaking it felt like it added on my already weapons-grade anxiety that I had to drop it. I can get the English Lit major pretty easily and get out of school with a degree, at least.

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>No motivation to keep writing a story I'll end up never sharing with anyone
>See no real point in going on
>Suicide seems like a great idea at this point

First world problems. I remember hearing constantly how poor people in Africa eating dirt every day had a lower suicide rate.

Honestly, I think it's because being through shit is their "normal". Once they get a taste of a good life and realize all the shit you need to do to keep it good, I'm sure they would off themselves quickly.

Also, I may or may not have cancer on my balls. I'm not checking either way. I'd rather just let it grow and kill me. On the bright side, I'm really looking forward to some vidya coming out in 2016.

>>962335
Comp sci is worth way more than eng lit.

>>962335

No

I studied liberal arts and I am currently working as a receptionist.

Get a real education.

>>962333
Dumb personal feeling BS.
I didn't work alongside other people so they were never around me and they felt I "wasn't personable enough".
Just shit I couldn't control.

no, sill using up my vacation between my old job and starting a new semester of Uni at the end of January

though it's scary how easy I can fall back into old sleep patterns

>>962339

Fuck hope I dont get fired for the same reason.

>>962337
Well I knew that, I just wanted to know if English Lit was worth *anything*.
>>962338
I'd like to but I struggle hard in situations I'm not totally sure I'll be good at. Calculus 1 and 2 are needed for the degree and I'm not very familiar with calculus, so I'd get so anxious I'd fucking vomit thinking about going to class.

I've got a list of psychologists who'll hopefully recommend psychiatrists so I can actually get a grip on my shit. I'm not stupid, I just stress the fuck out and lose all motivations to study calculus.

Thanks for the responses, though.

I didn't get into the tafe I was hoping to get into and I have a $607 fine for being drunk in public that I have no way to pay.

I have no job, no friends, are overweight and live with my parents.

This year will probably be my last unless something good happens soon.

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>>962271
>4am

>>962335

You literally do not need calculus to do computer science
Programming is more logic based than mathematics based (so you'll need to understand things like 'if this is true, do this' rather than 'find the third derivative of this formula')

>>962342
>Calculus 1 and 2 are needed for the degree

As in a prerequisite?
Are there any other uni/colleges around you?

>>962344
okay, you live in cambodia or some shit. and?

>>962279
>I'll continue my cycle of putting off the responsibility of actually giving a shit about my life.
I have 2 weeks to shape up and make sure Ill pull through this year at uni.

>>962345
It's needed for the upper division comp sci classes as a prerequisite. I've taken basic programming classes, but to go further it's required I take Calc 1 for the next level class and Calc 2 for the one after that.

>>962346
Yes. I'm at CU Boulder. If I was willing to move to Denver I could pick and easier campus, but CU Boulder is considered a pretty decent school while those Denver schools aren't seen as "prestigious". Also my only friends are here in Boulder and the thought of living in Denver is fucking awful.

>went to one semester of community college
>realize i have no direction
>can't even bring myself to go back and pick up more classes
What's the point? I don't even know what I want to do with my life. I just want to play video games and write music forever

>>962347
Nippon anon

>almost 27
>still live with parents
>make about $1800 a month
>college loans, car insurance, rent, and other things come out to about $1300 a month

help

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>>962352
Sorry anon.

I got issues of my own

>>962314
>>
>Now she's a shitter who hates league and is gold at best and I hit Plat 1 promos
wow, a girlfriend that improves with time.

>Worthless NEET
>Live with mother but practically are roommates
>No longer speaking to each other
>Have to force myself to draw fetish commissions to buy my own food
>Want a job but minorities move in and raise families into all entry level positions
>School makes me want to kill myself

I wish prostitution or some other super degrading job became legal/viable because I have no skills beneficial to society. I've learned how worthless certifications are. Not quite ready for suicide yet but if something doesn't work out this year the wheels are going to start turning on that thought.

>>962352
that money left over of your month is what most people make in 2 months work in my country

>>962352
>$500 surplus each month

oh boo-hoo

fuck you you piece of shit.

>exam in linear algebra andmultivariable calc in 5 days
>gave up on it halfway the course
>look at the first few questions of the early tutorials
>cant even solve those
I dont want to live anymroe.

Should I do japanese as a uni elective?

>>962352
>Almost 22
>Live with one leeching roommate
>$4200 a month
>Rent is $2000
>High school education
>Walking distance from work so no car
>Still a vidya and anime degenerate
Feels good man

>>962360
From what I understand, unless you want to go to Japan for work later it's not particularly helpful. Being a translator, professional or freelance seems to be a rough, somewhat unsafe field. If you want to learn as a hobby for games/anime I recommend it, the resources are out there for self study.

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>get off my ass and finally move out
>go travelling and meet a lot of people
>begin studying law at university
>quit after less than one semester
>now back to my hikki ways
Well, at least I moved out right?

>>962358

I should point out that $1300 is all going to my monthly bills, and that's not taking food, gas, or whatever else into account.

>>962363
hikki is better and worse on your own. At the one hand you can not give a shit and do what you want when you want, at the flip side you will have some moments where no one is around and you get crunched by loneliness. That almost physically hurts but after a while it goes away to make place for apathy.

>>962348
Good luck Anon

>>962362

It would mainly be as a hobby but I would also like it as an extra credential on the resume if possible

I've been looking through genetickanji.com just doing a few characters a day to get some prereading done effectively, I know in the first subject they teach 50 kanji and I'd imagine possibly hiragana and/or katakana as well, plus also actual speaking

I've got basically just electives left in my degree so I figure that it might be worth a shot at least, if I really hate it or find it too much work when I have other projects to do for uni I could always drop it

>>962366
The planning was I would shape up in the 2 weeks of winter break, then hit the ground running and go great.

it isnt going great and I dont know if those 2 weeks will be enough.

>>962364
>food and gas
>$500
Unless you eat out every meal and drive a Hummer, you'll be fine.
>tfw $200 a month for food and gas

I havent lost control. Lost control implies I had some kind of control in the first place. I feel like I'm going nowhere fast. I wanna go back to studying so I can get out of my dead end job but everything I'd want to study wouldn't actually get me a decent job. I feel trapped. I hate it. I hate myself.

But I did finally get started on working through my back catalog, just beat Dishonored. Man, worst morality system ever. I feel like I got 3 quarters in and all the characters decided I was an asshole and turned on a dime and started hating me out of nowhere. Super short is well. Took me about 9 hours to beat. I'd be pissed if I paid full price, but the twist was nice.

>>962368
I'm in the same boat Anon

Hopefully this semester is the one where I shake off the anxiety of speaking to anyone around me

>>962367
Oh ok, well that's a good plan especially if it's just a throwaway elective and you have no other idea. I self studied and have no experience in schooling with Japanese but I would imagine getting all that basic stuff out of the way would be ridiculously helpful, kana and starting kanji was such a huge hump in my learning and having to be on a deadline to learn it sounds like hell. The classroom experience I imagine would be more useful with grammar and speaking and stuff, I guess in this situation it doesn't sound like a waste

It takes so long to comprehend even the most basic games without a dictionary, though.

>>962370
the morale system was put in late. That was why it was so stupid. Well it is a choice between two evils, either the game is stupid where you can only cuddle every guard, or everyone hates you

>going to dmv to get license today
>then going to enroll in college as a 22 yo freshman
at least i get mistaken for being a 15 year old so people don't realize how much i've fucked up my life
when i was 16 i came to 4chan and met two different 23 year olds in steam threads (before they went to hell in a handbasket) who had spent their entire lives NEETs playing MMOs, reading manga, and shit posting
they tried to warn me but i didn't listen /v/, I DIDN'T LISTEN

>>962373
I have Dishonored but didn't play it yet, it bothers me whenever I hear about these kinds of black and white morality systems.

My favorite game regarding moral choices is Deus Ex. Primarily because there is no slider telling you you did good or bad, you get to decide it, and you experience the consequences. I'm SURE there's other games that do this well, consequence based stuff on your actions with no 'karma' system but in Deus Ex it's my favorite example.

>>962374
Don't sweat it. You're still young, you still have time to change it all. Tap into your ambition

>>962306
Go see a doctor for the depression bro. It could be a chemical imbalance in the brain and meds would help. I was there too and felt a million times better once I started on Lexapro.

>>962371
I have no problem speaking with people, I actually have a pretty decent time talking with people. Its just that I cant put in effort. Basically everyone says "you got talents but jesus youre so lazy". You are expected to put in 40 hours per week in your study but I barely hit 20. If I actually did work on it I probably passed everything without a hitch. Its just that im a lazy piece of shit and I know it.

Anyway, dont be too problematic with not being able to talk with people, they like to talk themselves so just learn how to egg them on.

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>>962289
>>962290

I guess I did. But it seems that I didn't, by how shitty I've been feeling.

It's funny how a woman can control a man by using her emotions and I just saw one of her tumblr's followers saying shit about me.

'He doesn't deserve you. If he doesn't come back, fuck him.'

And she, as any slut would, is nearly on her knees to suck that guy off.

Fuck, /v/. I guess games can't make you numb to everything, huh.

>>962374
>be 21
>be mistaken for 25+ (at least)
im balding and look tired. I wish I had looks

>>962374
>TFW 22, and can't finish college until I pay my school $9,000.
>No loans will accept me cause shit credit.
>Wallowing in self pity and getting by on minimum wage job.

Pull trigger when?

>>962379
>going to her tumblr

>>962375
yeah witcher has the same setup. It is actually simple, just make both choices have positive and negative consequences. Works a lot better than a system where youre either jesus incarnate or a dickhead

...I have.

Don't lose your job kids. Wake up. I mean it. You can't be lumbering through life in a daze. Set that alarm, take care of yourself. Time is your most precious resource and you should keep watch of it. The alternative, if you have a job, is terrible beyond belief. I saved so much money. So much. Was so proud of myself. And it all just got obliterated. I have to rebuild. It's not fun, but this wasn't enough to crush me. So I'll keep continuing on.

>>962361
dang what you do anon?

>>962383

How did you lose your money anon?

Lost is a long time ago senpai.

I want some horrible accident to happen to me, hopefully it kills me.

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>>962271
I finally applied for jobs but I literally put nothing for references so I doubt I'll be hired.

I don't know if I should go to college, military, or whatever. It's been keeping me up each night because I keep envisioning failing at life itself. It's probably small when compared to others though, it's only stressful I guess.

>Get home from work.
>It's already midnight.
>Friends are all asleep.
>No one to talk to. No voices to hear acknowledging you and you; them.
>Just sitting here in deafening silence, begging fate to wake one of them up, even if only for a few minutes before I go to bed.

>>962388
Should note that i'm really dumb when it comes to mathematics so I doubt i'd pass any mathematics classes so i'll probably end up failing college anyway.

>>962390
Im sht at math and went with chemistry

then I found out they have about 4 hard math courses. Someone save me

>>962386
Iktf. I've been looking up poisonous plants in my country, it should be easier to die than I thought.

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>20 page essay (plus presentation), and 10 page essay due to monday
>have 7 pages and zero will-power
Just make it end, already. This isn't worth staying alive for.

>>962391
Damn, that actually sounds really terrible.

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Im a little late

>>962392
If you're gonna do that at least try a bunch of drugs before you do. It's almost like the same shit. I recommend MDMA

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>>962382

Yeah. Was dumb of me.

Her best friend added me (I blocked my gf number) and said 'Gabriela wants you to look at this link and talk to her.'

There was some posts to me, a text telling me to give her a chance to speak (I didn't) and the occasional drama bullshit.

When I said to her friend that I wasn't going to give in, my ex deleted all of the posts tagged with my initials and a bunch of beta fags started talking shit about me.

One of them even got her number, but she was hurt, so I guess there's that.

I don't even know how to feel. I can give in and get her back, or just let time have her, along with Jamal, Tyrone, and tumblr's emo betafags.

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I wish I could catch cancer.
That way I'd be able to drop everything and live a few lazy years with reading, writing and vidya before I kick the bucket, and no one will blame me for being a useless shit.

>>962394
Yeah worst part is that I asked my high school chem teacher about it and he was like "yeah I did extra math but shits easy yo" while it is only easy if you are somewhat good with math. I managed to pass calculus I but then they have 2 mechanics courses and a linear alg.+multivar.calc course and Im currently busy failing those.

>>962375
I like games without the slider. We don't have a tangible moral compass in real life, so when the options are less black and white in the game it feels like a good thing. I enjoy having to take a moment to think about my decision because I'm not sure whether or not I'll like the outcome. It's made even better where they give you one of those and throw a time limit in to choose it.

>>962397
https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=nFHM5msfP9o
Switches and doors, Anon.
It'll pass.

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>Vacationing in Indonesia
>Two days till I fly back
>Hear about bombings in Jakarta
>Bombings have been planned for quite some time for Indonesia
>mfw

>>962272
I NEVER LOST CONTROL

>>962397
>get her back
>she is happy for 1 week
>then she starts taking shit to you because everyone convinced her you were a heartless dick for leaving her
>then she starts feeling better than you for being the only person pushing the relationship to advance.
>then in the end you just get emotionally drained by that emo vampire
seriously dude ive been here. Women ho constantly get validated by their friends about how shit you are are terrible. You just get sucked dry and then left to rot.

>failed college
>moving back in with my parents
>gonna end up going into the military even though I hate everything about it
>MGSV was bad
just kill me now

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>>962402
>chance to go out with a bang and have no social repercussions for your death
>post scared monkey
you'd even get remembered on some stone slab

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>>962406
Fuck that shit.

I just want to go home.

>>962402
rip

>>962373
Not surprised. It was so poorly implemented. The funnest powers and upgrades are all lethal, and the most fun I had with the game was experimenting with different ways to take out guards. The game punishes you for having fun with it. What a shit system.

Just woke up and im not hungry. Should I eat or just wait till hunger starts?

Also cant wait till tomorrow, then I can play dragons dogma

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>>962401

Thank you very much for the song.

>>962404

Yeah. That's how my relationship w her has been going lately.

We argued because she wants to go to this party w some guys that wanted to dated her some time ago, and while I gave her the liberty to choose, I was pissed (and she noticed).

But that's normal, right? All good until she makes a threat to me.

I hate threats, and she made a very simple and coward one.

'If you don't (...) I'm going to leave you.'

So I just said: 'then go.'

She didn't want to, now I tell you this. But I don't care. I don't care what her intention was when she had the balls to threat me with leaving, but now is having second thoughts.

That's why I'm always feeling like shit.

Now, if I do come back and talk to her, it'll be good for a while, but then it'll start to shit when she inevitably acts like a child.

>>962377
I might, thanks.

>>962410
You eat now to wake up your brain and feel happier later in the day.

Getting my life back on track.

3 years ago parents wanted to move from Holland to Brazil, last year I got kicked out for fighting with my dad, started working as an English teacher bought a small piece of land, we'll make it man.

I just wish I could make some dollars from here, they're worth alot these days.

>>962377
I want to do this but I'm too reliant on my mom to handle my issues when they arise. If I ever have any medical problem I just call her and she sets everything up for me. I'm afraid to tell her that I'm depressed because last time I told her she just brushed it off. How do I gain access to my own medical insurance and get therapy? I'm not sure how this works.

>>962411
She'll only hurt you more if you go back to her man. Just bear with this now and you'll feel better for it.

>>962414
>>I just wish I could make some dollars from here, they're worth alot these days.
cocaine

>>962379
You'll be fine duder. That feeling is totally normal and the sooner you accept that it's all part of growing up the sooner you'll feel better. Just don't play any fucking Kingdom hearts games, they'll bring you down.

I'm a mess to be honest. I sleep erratically, I'm 40 pounds overweight, I have little to no friends at all. I also feel like less of a person because everywhere I go everyone's always bigger and taller, even some girls (and I'm not even that short at 5'8). I actually l got back earlier from a pub with my cousin and a few of his friends, and I feel like shit because I'm awkward as fuck in social situations. So I'm sitting on his couch ruminating about all the things I hate about myself.

>>962419
maybe you should kys

Reconciled with my old weeb friend after fucking the girl he loved after she left him. I guess I'm dirt bag but meh

Everything seems alright. Job is good and I'm single now for two months.

Started playing more bass to git gud so me and my friends can start a band as something fun to do. All we need now is drummer.

Video game wise I'm trudging through dark souls 2. It just can't grip me like bloodbourne did.

>>962421
>Reconciled with my old weeb friend
guess he wasnt into NTR.

>>962420
Kek. Nah I'd miss out on all of the glorious vidya

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>Married my GF/best friend
>She has epilepsy and works from home
>I was going to school for computer science and working part time
>She wanted me to be home more so I quit my job she makes enough
>Spiral into video games and anime junkie life
>Schoolng goes to shit and get kicked off campus
>Get into online technical school
>She doesnt mind supporting me while I go to school but constantly talks about looking forward to me making enough that she can take a break from working so much
>I don't have the heart to tell her I've already gotten kicked out of Tech School
>Lie to her every day that I'm doing homework when I'm really on 4Chan
>Waiting for the day it all comes crashing down
>Waiting for the last good thing in my life to walk out
>Waiting until I can kill myself without leaving anyone sad about it

But in the meantime, these video games sure are fun.

>>962415
Not too sure about the insurance to be honest, mine have all been through an employer. Try looking on the obamacare site, there should be a FAQ or something that explains how to set up a plan.
That, or just have her book you an appointment as though it's a checkup or a physical or something and when you see the doctor tell them about your depression and see what they recommend.

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Thinking of breaking up with my gf. I love her and have been trying to make it work for almost two years but I feel like last weekend was the final straw. She almost does nothing in the relationship and when things don't go her way she goes on fits about how I don't love her. I've been making friends and we had a LAN party on Sunday, she could have went with me or told me she wanted to do something else but she didn't want or say anything so I went, she pouted and wouldn't hang out after then did her whole hissy fit again. I had it. Here is her beautiful fat ass.

>>962422
Does it still count if they only went on one date and then only dated for a week? I mean we didn't fuck till about a month and a half after that so I don't really think that counts.

He did ask me if it was alright if he dated her tho even if I was just fucking her on the side.

>doc asked me if I had thoughts of suicide
>answered truthfully
>said she might have to send me to a clinic

Did I fuck up /v/?

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>>962425
Wew, lad.
Wew.

>>962427
How old?

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>>962425
4chan isnt with a capital C.

Also she cares about you so you actually coming clean and trying to better yourself might actually save your marriage.

but yeah its pretty fucked up and I completely know how you feel as you watch your life spiralling out of control and down the drain. At least try to make her feel happy for a little while

I just got accepted into a full time position at an Australian pathway college (around $80K annual pay) but I also work part time at Monash University. Will probably start looking to buy my own property. Still single though and can't really see myself having a gf in the near future.

Having less time to play games. I only either play LoL with my housemates or browse /v/. I gave up with fallout 4 as I wasn't captivated by it like FO3, and the bugs does not help at all.

>TFW have a shit load of classes with group projects this semester.

Not even college has saved me from being the guy who has to ask the teacher to put me in a group.

>>962427
Sounds pretty unbearable. Can't tell much from the photo either.

Just dump that ass. You'll be better off.

>>962425
>computer science

that's were you went wrong anon. all your work woulda just got out sourced to india anyway.

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>>962431
I'm 22 and she's 21. I'm ugly and fat though so girlfriends are hard to come by.

>>962411
>Thank you very much for the song.
No problem, friend. We've all been there.

>>962427
Tell her to fuck off.
No use being fucking miserable just because your gf is a miserable cunt.

>>962429
>tell psychologist I have suicidal thoughts
>they agree they won't tell my mom
>at meeting a few weeks later
>they fucking tell her
>they also tell her I told them not to tell her

Psych people are lying fuckers.

>>962271
>writing my master's this semester.
>have to start working after that
>I don't want to.
>at least I won't be a poorfag anymore
>just want to be home and work on my video game and make shitty music

>>962271
hanging in there

job is alright
a girl that lead me on for months broke it off yet keeps texting me for attention
>/fit/ girls huh?

and looks like i'm finally moving out of home with 25, to move in with an old friend

>>962440
Were you underage?
They can't do that here unless you agreed to it

>>962443
>Were you underage?
17 at the time.

>parents are friends with some people in the neighbourhood
>they had a son who was studying
>3 years in he was ready with his bachelor
>they are getting ready to take a day off to attend his bachelor graduation
>one day they find a note on the table
>he dropped out after half a year and the last two and a half years he lied about studying, just did fuckall
>dread I will end up the same as him. Leading to a perpetual war between my laziness and my fear of ending up like him

>>962437
Post nudes

crop her face etc

Is it possible to pay for an apartment and highspeed internet on autismbux? Can anyone on the bux confirm? What's your usual payout like?

>>962429
How? You might be locked up with free food and internet, and everyone will just feel sorry for you. Jelly, tbqhfam

>>962440
Don't pyscholgist also have to maintain patient confidential shit? I would be pissed...unless your underage I think

>>962406
Did they intentionally make her eyes so far apart and giver her down syndrome in order for this scene?

>>962440

Where the fuck do you live that doesn't have doctor patient confidentially? Are you underaged or something?

I'm running out of food.

>>962429
Yes and though you may not care about guns and gun rights, the angle they are attacking them is through mental health. Soon being depressed will put you on many watch lists.

>>962448
>free
Anything but.

>>962448
>>962429
depression is worse than pretty much everything else in a social situation. People dont know how to deal with it so they just try to avoid you to prevent them from hurting you, making it worse. It depends on psych but most ive seen are terrible and youre better off blowing them off rather than being honest with them. As shit as it sounds.

>>962437
Dump her, hit the gym, get swole and work on your appearance.
If you're a fat, ugly, low self esteem piece of shit like you say, she's probably looking to control you. Don't let that happen, kazoku.

>>962444
Shit sucks
Sorry senpai
>>962448
>implying I have anyone that would feel sorry for me
I have perfectly fine internet and food right now senpai
I don't want to talk to a shit ton of docs about my problems
>>962453
In my country I am not allowed to own guns because of my mental problems already

>>962427
>>962437
Sorry but that's not the same person

Second one is a bit more chubby and has thicker thighs

First one's thighs are more slim and have a flat outline going from her butt/hip to her legs - while the second one is much more curvier

Nice try tho

>>962457
>I have perfectly fine internet and food right now senpai
Then what are you sad about, you ungrateful fuck?

>>962443
>>962449
>>962451
He admitted he was 17 and if a psychologist thinks there is a real danger you will kill your self they can break patient/doctor confidentiality. They may either inform the police and have you institutionalized (usually they will try to convince you of this and not just do it to you) or if you are underage they will tell your guardian.

I understand why you'd be pissed anon but your loved ones knowing you are suicidal is a good thing, trust me.

>>962437
>girlfriends are hard to come by.
Sure is, bro.

And if you really have to, go ahead and dump her. I don't blame you brah.

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>>962379
>I guess games can't make you numb to everything, huh.
Nah, you just haven't found the right game yet.

Get a real time sink and/or immersive enough to forget about real life.

>>962460
rude af desu

>>962459
might be pics taken with some time inbetween. With her gaining some weight. Doesnt really matter though, they arent even good ass pics

>>962464
Just kill yourself, senpai

>>962437
It souns annoying as fuck anon but if you're gonna dump her you mine as well make one last attempt to tell her how you feel. That you feel she never wants to do anything and you feel like she never wants you to hang out with other people.

Don't be accusatory, be inquisitive (even if she's obviously the one at fault if everything you say is true). Try to act like you just want to understand and you have a better chance of working things out.

If you've tried that though and it hasn't worked there is nothing else but therapy and it's obviously not worth that.

>>962466
maybe I will senpai

>uni starts up again in a month
>dislike course but already 3 years in
>lack of job opportunities from qualification
>gotta finish it or else time wasted
>hoping to do electrical trade once finished

only upside is parents. supported me all the way through it all.

god i'm lucky

>>962271
Right now i'm trying to figure out how in the absolute fuck I'm going to fix my life, it' so much shit going on that i seriously don't know what the fuck i'm going to solve all this shit. Also playing some MEtro Redux

>>962468
Time for life's eternal sotsugyou.

>>962352
1800$ in my country is a top notch salary anon.

>>962464
>>962466
>>962468
>le desu senpai xd


Back to /a/ you weeb degenerates.

You should straightforward kill yourself senpai baka.

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It's almost 2 in the afternoon over here in yuropoor. Just got home from my final bachelor exam, got the second highest grade, pretty sweet.

Not it's time to become a wageslave, get all the money for vidya but no time to play it.

I've lost control, but I had a job interview the other day which helped.

I'm just waiting for september to go to college.

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>>962473
My Little Anon Can't Possibly Be This Butt-Flustered

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>>962467
She's been through therapy and it only worsened the relationship in Fall 2015. The therapist told her to find someone else to date. She hated all the dates and it was really strong since then but my feelings have dropped since her claiming I don't have feelings for her after the whole therapist thing and letting her do it. She claims she knows how lazy she has been and has something planned for Valentines but she only acknowledged that after its evident I'm thinking of breaking up.

>>962459
>>962465
Correct they are from the beginning when we met to Saturday morning so yeah a lot changed.

>>962473
Maybe you should fuck off from a Christian weeb picture board, senpai

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slowly regaining control. finally got a job after like 2 years of being unemployed. sleep schedule is still fucked but it's fucked in a manageable way, so whatever. i'm not giving up pot though if i can avoid it, that shit's getting me through life.

>>962473
shit bait

>>962477
>She claims she knows how lazy she has been and has something planned for Valentines
Is this some kind of yearly "work everything out day" or something? We don't have Valentines day culture.

Shouldn't a relationship be something mutual and preferably enjoyable _every week_ of the year, not just one special day where you try to make the rest 255 days seem worth it.

How do I explain 2 years of unemployment to potential employers lads?

>>962477
Post her naked butt anon.

Who cares, this is anonymous image board

Whenever my gf drinks she turns abusive and hurtful. She never remembers the next day. I dont drink with her anymore.

>>962469
>god i'm lucky
or maybe not. I have supportive parents but I hate how I am not good enough to fully make use of it.

got the gun right here

>>962486
put your penis away man

>>962481
Valentine's isn't really that special. But last year I had a heart shaped Bamboo plant delivered to her workplace and she really liked that. Shit was expensive, like $90 total, thought a bamboo tree would be longer lasting than flowers but she managed to kill it.

>>962482
Did you do anything besides shitposting in the two years?

>>962437
If that's the case, enjoy her beautiful ass and just ignore her bullshit. Say sorry and whatever. Make it work somehow. You don't need to act like a little bitch, though. Go to LANs and what not, but make up some excuses to her so you can still fuck her.

Start working out, and dump her AFTER you got fit.
Otherwise you will regret it, fap to the memories of cumming on her ass and won't work out whatsoever, while she gets a new guy tomorow, whereas it will hard as fuck for you to find a new gf.

Been there, done that.

>>962482
Lie.

>>962486

I cant even look at guns. I cant even touch them, it just makes me scared. I'll never move to the US.

>>962271
>see thread
>just hit 4am

Fuck...

Anyone else get really stressed playing video games, because you focus too much on enjoying them?

For me, I have to be in a good mood to play a game, because if I'm not then I might not enjoy it as much and then I'll feel like shit for not liking a game, especially if it's part of an established series I like.

And I absolutely can't play single-player games with other people around, because they'll take me out of it, which again causes me to feel like shit.

It's pathetic as hell but video games are currently my only hobby and I'm not much of a happy person to being with. I've tried getting into other hobbies but I'm never in the mood for it.

>>962484
My gf also hits me when she gets pissy and it hurts really hard

I had several bruises over my body from the time when we got into heavy arguments

She even threw lamps and shoes at me and its the first when her girlfriends meet up in my apartment and I piss her off - her girlfriends help her up in beating

I'm too pussy to break up because I wouldn't have anyone else and we bought our apartment together, so not sure what to do.

I did go to report her to police one time when I had it enough - but girl with glasses that worked at the desk thought I was joking and started giggling, saying not to waste her time

I did tell police

>all these normalfags with girlfriends
You should be glad you only are feeling shit because of nogf rather than always feeling like this.

>>962482
sickness of family where you had to take most of the burden

>>962495
>its the first

I meant, it's the worst

>>962484
>>962495
top kek

>>962495
Why would you rather be in an abusive relationship than alone?

Just tell her to fuck off.

>>962500
It's the second point that is stopping me the most

We bought apartment together. We live in it. We are both in credit debth because of it - so we're kinda stuck together

I have a single father (mom passed away) in another state, but I don't wanna trouble him with my problems

>>962495
sounds like you need to go back to the police when it happens again. If someone tells you to not bother again, ask to see someone else. Keep going back. File a complaint against the person turning you away.
Also, leave her. Holy shit. I never understood this Stockholm Syndrome bullshit.

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>>962490
I know she will but I have been dealing with this off and on for almost 2 years. Starting to feel like I'll be better off without her. Sex is good but takes like a half hour to get her aroused. The effort is almost not worth it.

I have no nudes or anything anons.

>>962501
>>I have a single father (mom passed away) in another state, but I don't wanna trouble him with my problems
and you think your father woud like it if you are stuck in an abusive relationship?

>>962495
You're on a level below submissive women anon. That's an achievement.

> 5:00 am
I mean you got it on the dot, but cime on now

>>962501
>in credit debt

Real talk, why is this such a prominent issue? Do people think credit is free money or something?

>>962496
It's far, far worse to have loved and lost and be lonely, than it is to just be lonely to start with.

When you're lonely without experiencing it, you can romanticise it, make it this big thing in your head, imagine how perfect it would be, thinking of all the ways you could meet your perfect waifu and having a happy life together.

But you know what's far worse? Getting that, and then losing it. Knowing that YOU fucked it up. Knowing you had something perfect, the thing you've wanted so badly for so long, and then losing it. That is far, far worse than just being lonely.

>>962503
You two look cute

>>962507
People are fucking stupid. More at 11.

>>962507
How do you get a house without a debt?

>>962504
>and you think your father woud like it if you are stuck in an abusive relationship?

...No? It's the reason I won't tell him.

He got into severe depression and started drinking after mother passed away. He lost few jobs but managed to keep one for now and now he lives in a single apartment, alone

He can't help me

>>962508
>3DPD
>perfect
Someone didn't get the memo.

>>962336
>had a lower suicide rate
That's because they either got killed in war, starved to death, or merely didn't have the energy to kill themselves.

There are a lot of reasons why that could be the case. I'm almost positive none are, "Because they're happier and/or have less problems."

>>962507
When the PS3 launched and I had a shitty retail job I got my first credit card, and I figured "Well I have a steady job, why not". Literally the next month after I bought it, I lost my job. Only place I could find work was part-time minimum wage taco bell and burger flipping jobs and that just barely let me afford rent and food.

Of course though I learned at 18 to not ever fall in that again. But most people don't learn it that soon with that small of a purchase.

>>962511
Why do you need a house?

You could always live on rent. Or a fucking RV.

>>962516
I dont know his situation but if you need housing like an apartment debts can happen. It is at least not as retarded as getting debts for a car or non-necessary stuff

>>962516
Rent money is dead money.
At the same time, though, if you're patient and not a fucking idiot you can acquire a modest house with little debt, or an apartment with none. Too bad we live in an age where people want things immediately, without having to wait.

everyone is off to bed?

>>962519
I don't get this >4am thing. I mean, the whole world doesn't live in the same time zone.

And I feel the Murricans are the only ones making these pathetic threads.

>>962520
Obviously they're the ones making them, they're the ones in the right timezone.

>>962519
I havent slept in a while. I'm here.

>>962488

How the fuck........bamboo plants are easy as fuck to maintain

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I hung out with the girl I've had feelings for since primary school today and during that time she said

>"Oh, I forgot you were a guy!"

This is fucking suffering.

>>962523
Everyone I know who got one of those things has killed it. Normies don't look after shit they get. Also gift plants like that tend not to be well potted and die easily unless you were lucky and got a good one.

>mfw I see a potted plant that has glued together rocks on top of the soil

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>>962524
raep.

teach her your gender

>>962524

Jesus christ! Do you like her?

If not make some distance dude, fucking hell. I guarantee she knew that it would hurt you saying that. Girls are just so much more perceptive with that shit, she KNEW it'd hurt when she told you that.

>>962524
Do you look like a chick?

>>962526
Best friend's little sister so makes it hard

Alan Rickman also died. 2016 off to a sad start

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>>962527
I do, and I don't think she said it on purpose
it's okay because I pulled the same card on her half an hour later and she gave me the dirtiest fucking look ever.

>>962528
No, and I see where this is going.

>>962529
so you'd consider it if it wasnt so?

Anyway she is a bitch.

>>962531

Don't delude yourself, women know what they're saying. Question is WHY she said it.

>>962271
I am posting from Russia and it is 17:01 here. I am fine.

>4am thread Anonymous 01/14/16(Thu)11:00:00 No.323889639

good morning my burger friends

>>962533
Why do you think anon
To discourage any potential efforts?

>>962531
If you get comments like that you have to learn to be witty and make comebacks.

>>962534
Go invade another sovereign nation faggot

>>962536

Women will say stuff like that because they can get away with it. I wouldn't dwell on it, just go for it if you want to or leave her be if it's impossible.

>>962537
I can't remember what I said but I didn't take it lying down

I dunno anon. I think I might try my luck at the end of the year when I'm not longer a skelly and if it doesn't work out I'm just going to stop hanging out with her desu

>>962524
Imagine if she said that in bed. That would be some Japanese hentai shit right there.

>>962539
I'll try my hand at the end of this year, she's already knocked back another one of my friends (Which I watched happen gleefully) but if she's not willing to put out or even consider being more than friends I'm going to stop hanging out with her for good.

Doesn't help I'm already deeply entrenched in the friend zone

>>962271
i think i gave up a year ago. too ashamed to face my colleagues. too afraid to go outside so someone will see my failure.

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Things are not going too well

>>962542
>>
>Doesn't help I'm already deeply entrenched in the friend zone
read what you wrote, reflect

>>962545
It's worth a try motherfucker don't be so fucking depressing

you got no ambition

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>social life is strangely alright, was out with friends today
>drinking ice tea and browsing some threads
>haven't got work to do for the rest of the day so i'm chillin'
>drew loads of crappy oc these weeks and people liked it
>considered becoming a drawfag since people want one but i don't know what name i should choose
>played degenerate bingo and i lost because i'm surprisingly not degenerate
>porn chart says my tastes are "normal"
i'm so happy, yeah.

>>962546
ow well, once she laughs at you for trying to start shit when she doesnt see you as a man I wont judge you.

>>962548
k ;)

>moved to trash
>thread dies

Appreciate the effort anyway, mod

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>>323889639

>NEET/unemployed, want to get back in the business I hate and apply to my standard seasonal job
>need several references I've had contact with for 6 months
>tfw haven't seen anyone in almost a year

still have a nest-egg of 20k+ from it all, and thinking about just volunteering somewhere to build up a social life again and get some perspective

Or I could try going back to school and doing something else despite not knowing what to do

military's an option too if I spend some time getting fit again. I dunno, I'll play Darkest Dungeon in the meantime while hacking a 3ds in the /trash/ where I belong

>>962564
That's usually what happens when faggots like you get fucking rekt

Fuck you and every other culture-enabler shitting up /v/, this is your home now