You are Fabius Bile, former chief apothecary of the third legion, currently a sick fuck engaged in cloning primarchs, creating new chaos space marines and setting fashion trends among laboratory staff. Right now, you are on the bridge of your personal vessel, a corrupted strike cruiser which you have refurbished as a giant space travelling operating room.
What do you do?
(roll d100, highest will be chosen)
Rolled 59 (1d100)
Start working on a grox that is both a war animal and food source.
Breed them for durability and aggressiveness, use them as fodder in a fight and then throw them in the oven.
You decide to focus your attention on the animal kingdom. The common grox should serve well as a subject due to its delicious flesh and vile temper. You could try some of the serums you usually use on astartes on them to create the new grox. However, you do currently not have an exemplar at hand. How will you go about aquiring some of them?
Also, you decide that due to your sheer fabulousness you need a new name. You turn on your ships vox systems:
"I hereby declare that from this moment forth I shall be referred to as Fabuluos Bill for I am the most magnificent motherfucker in this universe."
Various astartes and crewmembers congrulate you on how fitting your new name is.
Rolled 19 (1d100)
Find an agri world with grox on it. Look for something with poor enough defences, these are common enough.
Go raid it.
Or, if we already have something like that under our thumb out there, go demand tribute.
Put on a fabulous hat.
You decide that you do should waste no time, so you start praying to the chaos gods, even though you do not really like them. And to the corpse emperor as well (although well aware of the irony of praying to something you once tried to clone). Sure enough, you get some kind of reply. Slaneesh is at board at once, since its kinda amused by your anthics. Khorne likes the idea of weaponised grox, even if he thinks of you as a collossal pansy. Nurgle is always on board with corrupting animals, and tzeentch seems to have his own reasons. You also seem to feel a faint sense of disgust, no idea where that might come from. A few moments later, someone calls you via vox:
" (Grunting in the background" Lord Fabulous, there is a horde of grox stampeding the enging room! Help us , pl" ( Wet Crunching noise).
You also remember a birthday gift lucius gave you one, a most magnificent hat entirely sewn together from various human and xeno tissius, with a spinal cord instead of afeather. You order one of your wretched servants to fetch it.
>"I hereby declare that from this moment forth I shall be referred to as Fabuluos Bill for I am the most magnificent motherfucker in this universe."
I had hope when I saw this in the catalog. That will teach me.
Rolled 84 (1d100)
Excellent. Now go make sure those things are in holding pens/cages/whatever we have on hand or can make quickly and get to work.
We will also need some place to breed these creatures we are making, so find some empty planet capable of sustaining them. Or some other convenient place.
Once they are secured, let the experiments begin.
Should've remembered using a tripcode.
You order your various creations to secure the beasts. There are some minor losses, and the engine room is covered in blood and grox feces, but it's not looking much worse because of that. Of course you have no shortage of cages. You airvent some of of the previous prisoners to make room for the grox. You also lock some captured guardsman up with the grox, so their feeding is also taken care of. You remember a lone jungle death world just outside the eye of terror which should be suitable for your purposes, and you set a course for said planet
Rolled 56 (1d100)
Now begin the experimenting.
Juice up the dragoncows with various serums and genetic manipulation.
We are aiming for: deliciousness, nutritious value, durability, aggressiveness (hopefully with some kind of on/off switch) without losing the built in benefits of the grox, such as being easy to breed and their ability to sustain themselves in any remotely havitable environment.
And we want these traits to be hereditary.
Rolled 4 (1d100)
Voting we take an Eldar, Chocolate or Vanilla, doesn't matter, and we make a Mon'Keigh out of them, through simple genetic restructuring or through plopping their brain into human body.
And if this Eldar is arrogant enough to make Kanye West look humble then all the better.
Do the preliminary testing now while wer're in transit, then set up a research base/lab and farm on the planet.
And we are going to need assistants who can run the gruntwork of it and menials to do the labor and animal handling.
>>45110047 You already have the necessary personal on your ship. It's basically a flying research facility/torture chamber.
There is no real reason to wait, so you start right away. What do you want to do precisely?
>Apply your own enhancement serum
>Inject them with a modified version of the Obliterator virus
>Design some genetic engineering techniques specifically for grox
You try out various methods.
First, you inject a small group of grox with your own serum, using your Xyclos Needler. The Effect is pretty quick, they mutate, grow stronger, more aggressive, and ultimately tear each other to peaces. Might be promising, needs some more work.
You also inject the obliterator virus in some of them, and immediately strap various kinds of weaponry on them. However, the obliterator virus generally needs some time to take effect, so you will have to wait.
You also start taking a look at the genetic material of the grox. Due to your millennia of experience, you almost immediately have several ideas to improve both their combat effectiveness and tastiness. Using their cells, you create several grot embryos and modify them using various vectors. You accelarte their development, they will soon be fully grown. You might want to test their new "capabilites" soon.
This takes up some time, so your ship isn't far from its destination now.
Once we're at the planet, find a good location and begin the construction of a dedicated lab/farm.
Also, we will need some enemies to test our doomcows on as they come out. Make a short list of appropriate ork, imperial and chaos targets for us to raid for something useful later.
We'll test the grox while making use of them.
Maybe Tau too if there are any nearby.
You arrive at the planet. Most of it is covered in jungle, which is more than a little affected by chaos corruption, but you simpley send down some people with flamers to clear an area and set up a facility. This isn't the first time you are doing this and therefore you have mobile equipment, this shouldn't take long.
Meanwhile, the genetically altered grox are close to maturing, they will soon be ready for testing. The grox with the obliterator virus are showing first signs of mutation, but have not yet merged with their weaponry.
There are various imperial worlds nearby, albeit most of them are rather well defended since their proximity to the eye of terror. You do have some captured guardsman of your own, though. No shortage of chaos targets around, from Chaos Marines to traitor guardsman and cultists which no one is going to miss on various demon worlds. You are positve that you can find some orks as well, somewhere around here. Might even be some feral orks left over on this planet from one waaaagh! or another. There is also an isolated tau enclave within reach.
Build any further facilities we might need like pens, farms and whatever.
Send scouts to comb through the immediate vicinity and then further out across the planet. Check for anything outside the ordinary.
Begin the construction of a more permanent research facility.
call it Agroprom
After setting up the basic facilities, you order your underlings to build pens. and permanent structures. You also order them to build farms, but this turns out to be quite difficult due to the aggresive nature of the local plantlife. Luckily, your skills at killing people turn out to be quite quite applicable for mass scale weeding. You proudly name your facility "Agroprom", you think naming things might be one of your previously undiscovered talents.
You also dispatch some of your underlings to scout the area. Those that do return (not many) report some grown other ruins that seem to be imperial in origin, as well as - like expected - some feral orks living in the jungle to the south.
In the meantime, the genetically modified grox have fully matured. The obliterator grox have started merging with their weaponry. You might want to think about how to control them properly.
Rolled 39 (1d100)
Do this and also look into sedatives that work on obliderator grox.
If we can't train them into doing as we say, maybe we can keep them asleep in metal boxes and then dump them on the enemy and wake them up, leaving them free to rampage through enemy lines.
Also, look into training, mind control chips or mind control sorcery.
Maybe dedicated psykers, each assigned a number of animals he can handle?
You have some high explosives strapped to the Oblitogrox. They do already express heightened aggression, but still don't quite grasp how their new body parts work, so they don't shoot to many of your guys in the progress.
You are quite familiar with handling obliterators, and can sedate the OblitoGrox for as long as you want if you choose to. You might try implanting artifical synapses into their brains which you could control remotely, however, due to the obliterator virus, their organisms might do weird stuff with cybernetic body parts. Sorcerous mind control might work, but you do only have minor sorceres and psykers at hand. One of them could control one, perhaps two Grox at best. You could ask some chaos sorcerers you know whether they want in on this.
Not in your retinue, but you could "call" some of them, sure.
Your retinue consists of some lab assistants, approximately thirty Emperors children who choose to follow you around, a squad of more or less stable "Enhanced Marines", several variaties of your creations, some dark mechanicus, some minor sorcerers whom you could also use for communication, the crew of your ship and loads and loads of mortal slaves, most of them mutated to various degrees.
Rolled 81 (1d100)
One or two should actually be enough, since the grox are disposable.
Bring 10 grox and 5 psykers to a battle, give each one animal and have them use the grox as ammunition. When one dies, just grab a new one from storage. Once you're out of grox, just leave because you're done with the battle.
Also, since we're apparently a bit short on psykers, we can set up a psyker breeding program at some point. Probably not right away.
For now, look into artificial synapses and psyker mind control.
Maybe have some demons posses them? If we can get some cheap enough pacts going, maybe we can get a demon to posses a grox and pilot the body? Khorne demons would probably be best here, but I'm not sure how well we get along with them.
Since you had the opportunity to do extensive "testing" on blood angels in your past, and have already created mutants which are fully consumed by the red first, you do know which part it is. You might not have the blood of Sanguinus anymore, but you should still have some blood angel geneseed lying around somewhere.
Perhaps you have found some remnant entertainment dataslate from before the dark age of technology and found some inspiration in there.
You generally don't get to well along with Khorne, or any of the dark gods for that. However, Khorne seemed to have liked the idea of weaponised grox. Perhaps you can find some khornate demons who think they are sufficiantly awesome to go along with it
okay, I'm gonna continue the grox project first..After that, you can tell me how you want to create the bloodlickers. What about the night lords? Do you want to call them, and what do you want to tell them?
We could see if they'd be interested. Their crusades tend to leave A LOT of blood on the ground, and Bloodlickers would be a great way to permanently contaminate a razed area after they've been through it.
You decide to try out out both artificial synapses and mind control. You have one of the OblitoGrox strapped to your operation table and personally insert the sypnases into his brain. It's quite entertaining, actually. You usually operate on humans or astartes, toying around with a grox is a welcome diversion. You quickly find out that you can remotely change its general attitude easily. Basically, you can put it to sleep, send it into an docile and obedient state in which it can be walked around, but won't fight, and send it into a state of rage, in which it will go LEEEROY and tear apart anything it sees and blasts away with every single weapon strapped to it with an accuracy that makes your average ork seem like a vindicare in comparison.
You also have one of your sorceres try to control it. The first one tries scratches his eyes out and claws away at you. You give him a touch with your Rod of Torment, he goes down screaming, Not actually that bad, since the OblitoGrox have quite the appetite. The second one does better, he manages a quite good and precise control of one Grox.
If they are so imprecise, using them is going to be a bit difficult. Maybe for shooting up crowds or really big things like demons or something.
How is our other batch going? The ones we just gene modded, not exposed to the oblit virus?
These ones show heightened aggressiveness and more muscle tissue. There were some quite funny incidents were they ate some slaves or each other, but you haven' tested them yet. Neither for their combat effectiveness nor for their taste
Rolled 41 (1d100)
Devise a training procedure. With or without some brain implants to help it along.
Since we want to mass produce them, the training needs to be simple enough to be performed by grox farmers and any implants must also be cheap and simple.
The idea is that, once we need them to fight, we pump their brain full of agression hormones and sic them to stampede on the enemy while the main army does something smarter.
When the fight is over, we throw the brains away, collect the meat and use it for rations.
Once we've got the grox refined, we mass produce them and export them to whoever wants to buy them.
You choose to adress the issue of their accuracy by devising a training regimen. For Grox. For OblitoGrox to be precise. Every other scientist around the universe would declare you insane. They would be right, but that doesn't stop you. You are Fabius Bile, you can do this shit. You put devise a regimen using positve and negative reinforcement using brain implants which stimulate the pain and joy centres of the grox brain. You install the implants in several of the grox, then lock them up in a cage with several "targets". In order to prevent them from just tearing them apart, you connect their legs with short chains, so the prisoners can easily run away from them. This way, they are forced to shoot them. Each time they miss, you hit the "pain" button. On a hit, they are rewarded with the "joy" button and the food. Sure enough, it works. They will never be sharpshooters, but at least they hit "sometimes" (think BS 2). The method is simple, and this kind implant is often used in slaves.
You also ask your sorceres about whether they can establish contact with the night lords. They are positive that they will manage a contact if required. They don't exactly like you, but they might listen if you have an interesting enough offer.
Rolled 57 (1d100)
Looks like the beta version of our grox is done?
Grab some and have them attack a group of the local orks or dangerous wildlife. Let's see how they perform.
Also, whoever suggested the Night Lord thing - what are we supposed to do with those guys again?
How would you want to go about this precisely? Who do want to attack? Do you want to test only the OblitoGrox, or the genetically modified ones as well? Do you want to deploy the Grox alone, or together with some of your other forces? Do you want to use the psychic control as well (allows precise control of individual Grox)?
We will want a set of tests, actually.
The orks are right here, they are a civilization of sorts, so testing the grox here is just convenient. Attack any nearby settlements.
We want to test everything, so start with a mix of genetically modified grox as frontline chargers, oblitorator grox as support controlled by a mix of implants and psychics, while we oversee with some marines as bodyguards in case things go wrong.
Then we will want to see how they perform when we pump them full of berserking drugs once they are in battle and so on. Be comprehensive.
Your scouts have made out a fortified village of feral orks roughly 50 kilometres south of your facility. You sedate your various types of Grox to make transport easier, and have them loaded onto the assortment of vehicles you have lying around on your cruiser. While sedating them, you also insert remote controlled vials with potent combat drugs into some of those you intend for frontline use Once you intrude in their territory, the orks quickly notice you, and it is not long until you can hear the pounding of drum and the shouting of "waaagh!" which even these primitive, abandoned orks still seem to remember. You quickly awaken your Grox. You have your psykers, of which you brought 6, tale each control of the genetically modified Grox and bring them into a line. The other Grox afollow them, so they form something resembling an orderly formation. Meanwhile, you send your OblitoGrox into the docile state and have them arranged behind them. You yourself stay back with your enhanced marines and a squad of emperors children and look at your beatiful creations, anticipating the coming slaughter. Death by the "hands" of a Grox, what a humilating death. You can't wait to see it. By now the yelling and drumming grows loader, and at once, the orks burst forth from beaneath the underbrush, screaming at the top of their lungs.
Seeing that, the grox can't hold back any longer, they surge forward, the ground shaking beneath their feet. At the same time, you send the Oblitogrox into their beserker state. Their roaring drowns the orkish warcries, only to be in turn drowned by the weapon fire, of Lascannons, of Heavy Bolters, of Plasma Guns. Most shots fall wide, but those that connect leave nothing but a steaming green-black mess. This doesn't stop the orks though, the two lines are only seconds from clashing. Thats the moment when you acitvate the combat drugs, which immediatly kich in. If the grox have been terrifying before, they are now a living nightmare which rivals minor deamons. They tear into the orkish ranks like a chainsword into into a newborn. The slaughter is beautiful to behold, albeit it only lasts moments. Blood, entrails, bodyparts and whole orks flying around like rose petals on a wedding. The orks, moments ago so eager for battle, turn around and try to flee, to no avail. They cannot possibly outrun these things, and are torn apart within moments. However, having nothing else to kill, the raving, foaming Grox quickly turn on each other, ripping each other to bleady shreds.
What do you do?
Rolled 37 (1d100)
Write down notes and observations, of course.
Recover any we didn't send into a frenzy, move back and let the rest beat eachother up. Clear up what remains, recover the bodies and take them to the lab for testing. Make sure they are edible and everything.
You have the Grox which you still can controll ordererd back, but there aren't many who make it back before they are ripped to pieces by their enraged brethren. You keep on watching the slaughter, which lasts notably longer than the battle against the orks, and make observation concerning the behaviour of the beasts. It seems that the effects of drugs seem to be far stronger on the grox than on human consumers, you have only seen such rage on khornate berserkers before. However, this also seems to have a toll on the organisms of the Grox, several ones simple fall over without mortal wounds, you suppose they suffer from a metabolism collaps due to the drugs. On occasion, one of the enraged beasts breaks out from the bloody slapfest and makes for you and your body guard, but your OblitoGrox and Marines make short work of them.
Rolled 30 (1d100)
HAHA time for labwork.
Do tests, check how edible they are, improve and prepare new batches.
Maybe try to improve the part of the brain that handles accuracy for the next batch of obliderators? Or modify their metabolism for grox to be more compatible with the stims we intend to use on them?
Or make them accept implants better?
Iterate a bit and start new batches after doing some tests on the corpses of the current batch.
After 10 Minutes or so, the battle is finally other, the last drugged up Grox dropps dead after killing its last opponent. You order to take some of the corpses to your facility right now, and order your slaves to carry the rest to the facility later.
After the combat testing, you decide to check on your second objective, their edibility. Of course you could just test them for toxins and the like, but it is easier and far more entertaining to force some of your prisoners and slaves to simply eat them. They test results are the following:
Not-drugged up genetically enhanced Grox: Taste quite well, edible even in raw form
Drugged up genetically enhanced Grox: Induce various effects in mortal consumers (Vomiting, loose of conciousness, death by anaphylactic shock). An Astartes tried one of them, quote: "That's real good shit man, can you somehow turn this into something you inject or smoke?"
Obliterator Grox: Instant, agonizing, prolonged death of the subjects, all the while screaming for their death.
>"That's real good shit man, can you somehow turn this into something you inject or smoke?"
I'm sure we'll figure something out. Maybe hand off the project to one of our assistant researchers?
Other than that, the project is a complete success so far.
Hooray for mass producible cannon fodder that doubles as rations.
Now make a bunch of them and go do a proper test by raiding whichever nearby planet has something useful.
Maybe raid the Tau enclave for their flashy technology and some slaves while we're at it.
Using the grox to close in on Tau firing lines would make a great use of them.
If OP comes back,
See if we can get them to actually reproduce. If we have to keep growing and implanting new batches it'll just interfere with any other research we might do in the future.