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What would you do if you had a time machine, r9k?
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You are currently reading a thread in /r9k/ - ROBOT9001

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What would you do if you had a time machine, r9k?

I'd go back in time and kill the person who invented the mason jar. I hate those stupid little cuck jars.
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I'd go back in time and kill the baby version of me. Then I'd fade away and be at peace.
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Go back in time and fuck myself in the ass
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>>26439727
stop the oxygen holocaust and then come back to see how earth developed
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Go back in time, pretend im a sort of villain and force my past self to kill me. It should be fun.

Also i would tell a shitton of lies about the future.
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I'd fast forward to the end of the universe
I'm tired of this bullshit, I'm ready to skip straight to the end
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>>26439727
Mason jars are best jars ducking pleb. I bet this factor only uses them to hold liquid. Kek doyouevenmason
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>>26439727
Exterminated the common ancestor of all viruses before it spread
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Future:
- find out what happens in an undisturbed timeline
- take whatever useful tech I can for my own personal use or patent it hundreds of years ahead of its time

Past:
- watch the hell out of some dinosaurs and shit, take samples or something
- take pictures of neat prehistoric stuff


But mostly I'd run it at normal speed going forward
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I'd go back in time and invent the mason jar, making millions of dollars on royalties.
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>>26439727
mason jars are good for pickling and preserves.
If I had a time machine I'd try to find a way to prevent my dad's suicide.
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Would go back to a time when earth was less populated and live alone in the woods.

Maybe would try to get some money using the time manipulation to get myself some cool things to play alone, probably not, just being alone is enough.
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Rewatch WWII and find out what really happened.
Also Bro fist Hitler and tell him to ignore Russia. And to not make those super structures because no monies
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>>26439727
- make money off of inflation
- become feared prank master every april fools day
- create hidden evidence of actual historical events you witnessed while time traveling and "find" it in the future
- take photos and samples throuought history and contribute to science
- go to any point of history and live wherever living is the most fun
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>>26439825
I'd go back in time and kill you before you can kill the baby version of yourself.

Because fuck you
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>>26439727
Use it to reside over humanity as it's eternal protector, and also to eliminate those who threaten the western world.
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give Americans AK-47's during the Revolutionary war
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>>26441814
Then i'd go and give the British many tanks and long range artillery.
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>>26439727
I want to make a fake lab and reenact Steins;Gate and hopefully get a qt science nerd gf ;_;
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>>26441847
How the fuck do you fit a Tank in a time machine?
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>>26441885
I'll take the parts and tools to assemle it m8
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>>26441700
Please do. I won't fight back.
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>>26439727
I would go all the way back to primordial soup and take a piss in it preventing the evolution of sentient life
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>>26441885
how the fuck would you fit enough AK47s to make a difference in a time machine if you cant fit a tank?

all of this is in Orson Scott Card's Masterpiece Gatefather at the end of the Mithermage series aka better than enders game aka enders game books were boring ender's shadows books werent o ya
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>>26441899
Since you are such a wuss I will try to figure out a way to use my time machine to get you stuck in a loop where you relive your life in exactly the same way for all eternity.

How about that? Would you like that?
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>>26441814
>helping the side that won anyway

hurr
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>>26441929
It's not like you can't make multiple trips
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>>26441894
so you're somehow going to procure multiple tanks, take them apart, transport them, put them back together, and then teach the soldiers how to use them? Sounds like complete bullshit to me.

>>26441929
You wouldn't need that many. You can carry 5 easily on your person and that alone would wipe out hundreds in a minute.
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I'm not sure, maybe I should go far back in time and try to fuck up as much as possible.
Or maybe I should go not very far and prevent some destructive family drama from happening, like my aunt and uncle dying too soon and help my parents do some smart investment to secure the future and get my autism checked out sooner.
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I'd travel back 5 minutes and convince myself that I shouldn't have came to that
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>>26441954
Doesn't mean it isn't possible. Just go a few years before the revolution begins and do it all in secret.
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I'd go back and warn US government about 9/11 by showing them footage and then going back in time further after that to convince the terrorists to redirect it to the white house they won't know what hit em
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I'd go back in time and thwart all you guys' plots and intentions.

starting with this edgelord
>>26441986
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>>26441947
true, but i think strategists would find a way to deal with it, as they did in WW1
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>>26441986
allah akbar my friend am i rite lmao
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>>26442005
I'd go in the future to fug your wife, oh w8 you're gay
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>>26439727
Why do so many people answer that they'd rather go back into the past rather than see the future?
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Go back in time and stop myself from fucking up my penis...i want to die.
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>>26442024
The only time this retort is ever considered good is if you're in the seventh grade. Either that, or bait.
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>>26442069
whae happned to your penis. please tell us
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>>26439887
This tbqh. I even fantasized about it once.
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>>26439727
I'm not sure, there's so much in history that be worth seeing
not to mention seeing where the future of humanity will be
if I ever got bored of that I'd go back to my biggest spaghetti moment and prep myself so I don't fuck up
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>>26442035
Because the future is most likely going to be horrible.

At least with going back in the past we can fuck ourselves in the ass instead of having others do it for us in the future.
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Go back to 1940 and advise the fuhrer of what to do to win.
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re-invent modern technology in the past so I can feel like I'm important for once
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>>26439727
Shoot Y chromosome Adam and to make everyone human that has existed to cease to have existed.
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Play monopoly with myself.
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>>26443221

>Not going back even further and informing him of all sorts of technology to the best of your ability and warning him about radar and nuclear weapons and shit so he has a head start
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>>26439727
Win a couple millions in the lottery
Ye I'm lame like that
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I would go and abduct people then let them go in the stone age near some bunch of retarded cavemen and watch them get beaten/raped/killed
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I'd go back to the warring states period of Japan become a samurai warrior fighting for honor and loyalty
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>>26439727
go back to 1900 germany befriend hitler and help him win the war
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>>26441954
Yeah thats the bullshit part, not the having a time machine part, definitely the first part, right?
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>>26439727
i would go really far into the future and kidnap the future self of one of my nemesis. Then I would time travel back with old nemesis and graphically murder them infront of young nemesis. then i'd go back to the future the day before kidnapping old nemesis and teleport him back in time to like the day after his younger self witnessed the first killing and kill him again in front of him. I'd do it repeatedly, in different ways, different times, different locations, i'd play around with the machine to get it down right. one day he'll figure out that older person being killed more and more looks like his current self. wake up in the middle of the night one night out of a dead sleep and see yourself get killed stuff like that. maybe just little things in between to lower their guard about another killing happening but still fuck up their day in a minor way.
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>>26442104
Sounds like what a gay would say
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