>be in class
>''okay get into groups''
>sit there awkwardly until some chad takes pity on me
>you can come with us anon, unless you're going with anonette
>girl is sat on her own with nobody
>as soon as he says this she blurts out 'NO!'
>it was loud
>don't think she meant to be that obvious
>don't look at her and just put my head down and awkwardly sit with chad and his group not contributing
The ride never ends does it?
No, the majority of chads are like the latter. There's a difference between chads and alphas. All chads are alphas, but not all alphas are chads.
Chads are the ones who have everything going for them. Looks, athleticism, smarts, family, friends, money. Chads don't have to be dicks or put people down because they already know they're perfect and they don't mind taking pity on the betas.
Alphas on the other hand, are just people who are good socially. These are the biggest douches and just try to pull chicks and put others down.
Pretty much this, that's what makes chads so much more unbearable, at least alpha dudebros give robots a reason to hate them, but those fucking chads are ALWAYS trying to look out for us. Why can't they realize we don't want their pity?
Chads have generally shown me a lot of respect. When bullies picked on me, Chads would stand up for me and tell them to knock it off. It seems like Chads just "get" me, you know? They get that I'm quiet and don't like to talk very much and would rather just fade away in the background. Maybe they envy me a bit, maybe they wish they could have a life without all that social stress on them to act certain ways and all eyes being on them, which makes it hard to explore new things and make human mistakes every now and then.
There was this one Chad who told me I was so lucky that I wasn't in any clubs or sports, because I got to dick around all day doing whatever while he had to go to boring club meetings and varsity practices so he didn't disappoint his parents. I guess polar opposites attract one another, because each one keeps wondering what life would be like as the other. I would love to have lots of friends, do romantic stuff with girls, and excel in extracurriculars. I envy Chads a lot for that. But I can see that their lives aren't easy, they're under a lot of stress and have lots of responsibilities holding them down. I don't think I could handle all that, y'know? I'd rather just dick around all day and not have anything expected of me. Just do what I feel like doing.
Sure it gets boring sometimes, but that's just the ennui of someone who is pretty content with life, isn't it? That's what all the existentialists wrote about, the big brained Frenchies who spent too much time doing nothing in cafes all day. I don't know, maybe that boredom signals that I'm not living my life to the fullest. Maybe I'm not actually doing what I'd like to, but rather whatever I can do with little effort? That's a sad thought. All this time I thought I was free, when in fact I'm trapped by my laziness just like a Chad is trapped by his responsibilities. Is there a way out? Who knows. Cigarette time.
Maybe there's a third way out of this demarcation I've drawn. What if I actually did what I'd genuinely like to be doing? What if I found things that made life meaningful for me? Then they wouldn't just be "responsibilities", which I'm very averse to. They would be my interests, my hobbies, and maybe my profession if I can make any money off doing what I like.
I'm working on a music album right now. I'm scrapping everything I've written so far, because it's all poppy garbage. I want to make pure art, I want to explore new sound textures and build inventive effects stacks. I want my lyrics to be clever and meaningful. I keep starting my album over because I really want it to be perfect. I have such grandiose plans, and maybe that's my ruin. Ten-minute long medleys that circle through a handful of different genres. An improvised experimental piece where two guitars scream out at each other in distorted walls of noise. A psychedelic drone song where I play Eastern melodies over the pervasive bass tone and scream out scenes from my own made-up Greek mythology. This project is taking a toll on my health, because I stay up for days on amphetamines trying to write new material.
But if I'm going to do this right, I gotta give it my full effort. I want this to be my magnum opus, the pinnacle of my life's achievements. I think each man owes it to himself to create his opus, something that says "I have existed here, and this is who I am!" and affirms his entire being. Maybe that is our purpose as conscious individuals. Modern society has made us pure consumers, sitting down and absorbing all this filth around us. That's why we're so lethargic and crave for meaning, Chad and robot alike. We need to create! Creation liberates our souls.
Take the gun from my cold unflinching hands, anon.
I always thought amphetamines were a thinker's drug. You turn your eyes towards concepts that seem abstract and difficult, but somehow you manage to tear them into small pieces and ponder bit by bit until you come up with intricate theories about how everyone should live their lives. You get so sure that you've finally figured it all out! Your place is this world is clear as day. And then you forget about it and you don't even end up living it out.
Think of all the good amphetamines have done for us. All the Beat writers did amphetamines, back when they were sold as OTC nasal decongestants or handed out for depression. Velvet Underground were users too, they have an entire album dedicated to meth. Then you've got the Nazis, of course. Hitler came up with lots of stuff while he was tweaking his nuts off. Fascism is the perfect thinker's political system, and it's a classic example of the kind of stuff amphetamines make you think. It's essentially a government run by tweaked-out philosopher kings, like the kinda political system that the Greeks dreamed of way before. The leaders spend all day taking amphetamines and thinking of how people should live their lives, then the rest of the "commoners" must follow suit.
And that shows the downside of amphetamine too. It makes you way too sure that you're right, way too sure that you've got it all figured out. You feel like you're somehow "better" than everyone else. The Nazis built this entire ideology from scratch, a very inventive thought game that somehow became actual politics. You have to admit Hitler was pretty creative, making this entire worldview up in Viennese cafes. It went beyond the usual right-left spectrum into a third path that no one had ventured before. But the Nazis got too cocky. They thought they could take on the whole world, because amphetamines make you so sure that you're right and that nothing can stop you. The great amphetamine experiment failed.
I don't know if anyone ever actually reads my amphetamine rants. I think they're pretty good, I should collect them and publish them. In all probability, they're most likely just messy jumbled garbage strewn together by the severely damaged brain of a man who hasn't slept in two days. I just made a case for the Nazis being the ultimate manifestation of an amphetamine philosophy.
If they're controlled, stimulants can have a lot of power though. You're filled with ideas and you're building new connections between things and you're forging out radical ideologies. You think and think and think. But anyone can think, it takes so much more to do. Look at how pathetic I am! I pin myself as some kind of musician, when I can't even create a single song that makes me satisfied. It's all ideas for me, I've got plenty of ideas for songs but I haven't actually gotten them done yet. I could type up a summary of an entire album in just a few minutes, one so inventive that people would crave to hear it. But I could never record that album. I can plan, but I can't do. If I was a real musician, I would be strumming some chords and writing down some verses right now.
Fuck, it's all think and no do for me. It feels so awful being stuck in my own head. I just talk to myself all day, planning out these elaborate projects. I keep "figuring it all out", but what good is that when I don't change how I'm acting?
I don't know the answers. I act like I'm so smart and I've worked everything out, but the reality is, I'm just a really lost man thinking way too much and begging for substance in his life.
That's all I can think up for today. I'll be back tomorrow. You'll recognize me as the guy who's writing huge wallposts about Frozen being secret propaganda for the Big Oil corporations.
>In all probability, they're most likely just messy jumbled garbage strewn together by the severely damaged brain of a man who hasn't slept in two days
I enjoy your ramblings because they read exactly like my inner monologue that I had when I was on amphetamines.
I enjoyed that read. I recognize the feeling you describe. I feel it's like this with a lot of stimulants. You feel like you're going to do all this stuff and you have all these great ideas, but nothing ever comes of it. Maybe it's time to cut down on your use and just do small, baseline doses to get you going. It seems you're getting way too caught up in your thoughts and ideas on your current dose. Just a thought. I feel like doing low doses is the key to balancing productivity and creativity. I still honestly believe that very low dose MXE, for example, is probably one of the most effective anti-depressants out there. I know that's not the same thing, but baseline doses of drugs, just in general, seem to work wonders for real life and actual work, unless you're looking to trip.
I'm both. I'm good socially but i don't hate robots in any way, and I talk to them whenever I see them IRL.
There's a difference between alphas and douchebags. Not all alphas are douchebags and not all douchebags are alphas, but mostly they're grouped together.
Don't hate Chad, don't always hate alphas, but hate douchebags.
This just makes everything worse. If Chad bullies me or is mean to me, at least I could properly hate him.
But you guys are right, most of them are nice. I often respect them. And it's fucking killing me. Makes me feel like even more of a failure and an asshole.
>Be in HS, sophomore, 15 years old
>Told to get into pairs
>Girl next to me, call her Sara, jumps up to pair up with someone else. I end up being the 3rd person with another group because no one would pair with me
>Junior year, again getting into groups, Sara there again. As i approach the closest group (she's in it) she says 'nevermind' and goes to other group
>Senior year, almost identical to your scenario. Teacher asks if we will pair up, Sara almost yells when she says 'no'
>Go to college, forget about Sara
>Get a job in another town
>Talking to my mom one day, she says 'hey, I bumped into that girl you went to school with. Sara."
>"Yes. She asked about you, wanted to know how you are doing?"
>"Yes! She told me she had a major crush on you all through high school"
THIS ISN'T REAL. THIS ISN'T REAL. THIS ISN'T REAL.
>THE PAIN WONT END
>THIS FEEL HIT ME LIKE A TRUCK
Why do girls do this?
>be me at 16
>go to new school
>hot girl pops up to me on Facebook from English class
>makes boring convo
>every single day she'd tell me she didn't find me attractive or at least imply it heavily
>2 years pass
>last time we see each other on holiday drunk with lots of other friends
>she tells me she was in love with me and delayed dating her boyfriend just to wait and see if I was interested
>never see her again
It got better.
>"She had a crush on me?"
>"That's what she said! She is as pretty as ever, too. She came by the clinic to get her baby's first checkup. She married Derek last year. You remember Derek? You and Derek looked so much alike the gym coach used to call you by each other's name."
>"She married Derek?"
>"Yes. he got a job as a truck driver and is making a decent enough living, I guess"
A truck driver that looks like me. While I was off becoming a fucking accountant.
Chad(s) who don't act like the stereotypical Alpha as depicted above are not called Chad(s) they are called
>as soon the teacher/someone else suggests you sit with a girl she visibly gets disgusted and even vocally expresses her dislike
I never realized how much this really should've hurt.
Kyle stood up for you.
Kyle dove in front of you and rose his shield
Kyle picked you up when you called an Uber
Kyle got you there on time. Every time.
Kyle kicked the asses and took the blame.
Kyle let you cry on his shoulder.
Kyle passed through fire and death for you, Wojak. And you remembered him as "Chad"
Because Kyle doesn't care to tell you his name or title when he helps you.
>class split into small groups
>not assignments, just journals and practice sessions
>my group doesn't update me with meetings
>makes it obvious I'm not wanted
>they go through the trouble of texting each other and not updating the //dedicated social media page// to prevent me from knowing
>waste a lot of time turning up to a lot of cancelled group meetings.
Okay I got it, you don't want me around, I'll just find another group right?
>turn up to another group meeting
>try not to be pushy and be as courteous as possible
>girl is glaring at me angrily the entire time
>ask her what's wrong in the middle of meeting
>"You're not supposed to be here, anon".
>other girl speaks up
>"Yeah this is our group. Why can't you stick to your group?"
>mumble something autistically
>leave unannounced and ignored
>never leave house for 2 years
>become unrecognizable from lack of personal care
>grade dropped to bare pass
I am thankful for not having to deal with school again.
Keket, Kyle didn't hit on you not because you weren't pretty or not attractive but because you were. Because he wanted you to have what he had. Freedom.
Dont worry guys. Most relationships end so you probably wouldnt be with her anyway now and would be feeling like shit because she cheated/did something as is usual for women.
>prof puts us into groups of five
>one of my groupmates is a qt Japanese milf
>sits next to me, constantly looking over at me, only talks to me
>as we are leaving she gives me a big smile and we introduce ourselves, says we should sit next to each other next class
>now in my dorm snacking on some tendies, crinkle cut fries, honey mustard and a Dr Pepper
Who /dankasfuckday/ here?