how do you guys troll in real life? >girl in class sits in

>>26379243
dude thx for sharing this epic moment with us haha: )

I do not believe a word, you absolute madman.

One time I walked up to this woman and told her that she was a sinful whore who didn't deserve what she had, I then kicked her in the shin which knocked her to the ground. I spit on her and hurled insults at her while she was on the ground. She was crying and in clear shock as her body was locked up and she couldn't do anything but scream. I put my mouth to her ear and hum the trolololol song to her, then threw her to the ground and kicked her in the stomach and while I was walking away yelled at her "LOL U MAD BRO?" and then ran away laughing.

pwned hard XD

>>26379381
You should have informed her that you were merely pranking her.

>>26379243
Seriously, who else miss this kind of things?

It was so..... Pure

>>26379412
I was never a 10 year old who browsed Reddit so I don't think this kind of stuff is all that funny.

>drivers education
>chick taking shoulder selfies of me
>flip off camera

I'm the official badass of 2016, I know

>>26379430
Didn't say it was funny tho

I chloroformed my mom with a 2 year old cum rag that I've used consistently and never washed.

>>26379467
How do you even do that? Your rag would be as hard as a piece of bread that was sitting out of its package for a month. It can't be easy to chloroform correctly when it's like that.

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>born without the weakness you call "empathy"
>other meatsacks are nothing but puppets to me and I'm pulling the strings
Let's play a game, roach. The rules are simple.
Heads I win. Tails you lose.

>>26379600
oh god holy fucking shit
i remember those threads with that guy that "played" with everyone or some shit like that and it had that EXACT same picture

>>26379600
edgy.
>>26379629
edgier.

Sometimes I purposely fuck with the custodian by putting apple sauce on everything i can

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great work op. rekt xD

>September 11 2001 terror attacks
>busy working in the World Trade Center, at the top floor
>either sandniggers or people brainwashed by Jews, I honestly can't tell, start crashing planes with no survivors
>everyone panicking
>remain calm
>grab the nearest chair
>jump out the window
>stand on top of chair while falling
>jump off the chair when I'm almost at the ground
>survive because frame of reference of the chair suggests I was not falling at a lethal velocity, and if I was I protected myself by jumping

>>26379629

like yeah dude that was like almost 2 months ago

>United States law dictates that in order for damaged currency to be deemed valid, at least half of the note must remain intact
>get money
>cut it in perfect halves
>double my net worth in minutes

Troll the economy.

>>26379718
>he still believes in the biggest Jewish hoax since the hoaxocaust
>doesn't know the twin towers were made of foam that collapsed harmlessly
>"oy vey Chaim, help me throw these mannequins out the window. It'll make a great shot for the stupid goyim, hehe"

>>26379846
>cut a $20 bill into 100 pieces
>take each piece to the bank and get them to replace your damaged bill with a new one
>$1980 profit

>>26379718
The unbelievably minute amount of force generated by you pushing off a chair that isnt fixed to anything wouldnt do anything except make you look extra retarded in death.

>>26379243
Kek. That is an all time classic. Good one OP.

>>26379976
But that's wrong. All motion is relative. In the chair-body system with the chair as the intertial frame of reference, my velocity is in fact 0 meters per second despite the fact that some people see me as falling. Since velocity is zero, I was never in any danger to begin with, but I jump just to make sure. So I survived. Besides, if I didn't survive how am I posting?

>>26379976
He should have got on the roof and rode the collapsing skyscraper like a buckin' bronco. The building will collapse slow enough that you can easily step off once you reach ground level.

>>26380010
in the inertial frame of reference of the chair there is still a concrete ground accelerating towards you at well over lethal speed

>>26380010
A bean bag chair would work better. You don't even need to jump off. The soft beans cushion the impact and you land on the ground looking all comfy and smug as fuck.

>>26380050
In physics, it is necessary to get rid of unnecessary details in order to understand things more clearly and make calculations. As such, the ground is irrelevant in the chair-body system featuring me and the chair, and can therefore be completely ignored.

>>26380096
and dead. and beans everywhere

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Today I was scooping ice cream at a campus dining commons and two girls were waiting to use it next after me, one on my left, on on my right.

When I finished scooping myself ice cream, I faked giving the scoop to the one on my left, then faked giving it to the one on the right, and then I just put it down in the middle and walked away.
I turned around and saw them fighting over it as I walked away

>>26379406
Indeed, otherwise it's like an assault or something I think.

>>26379973
negative, ghost rider

>>26379846
Does it really state "at least" half? Because then your shit would work.

>>26380578
>cut $20 in half
>get 2 $20s
>cut those in half....
>INFINITE MONEY

>>26380578
so which one of us is gonna try it?

>>26380800
>cut my $20 down to its individual subatomic particles by cutting it perfectly in half over and over again
>now the richest man on Earth
>go to Subway
>order $5 footlong meatball marinara sub
>sandwich artist goes to ring me up
>hand him an electron from the $20 bill
>sandwich artist stares blankly at my hand
>"Sir, your money please?"

>>26380898
subway huh..

>get near the top of the stairs
>fart
>everyone below me has to walk through my fart

>>26379243
kill yourself amitabh garg

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>>26380966
Yeah, subway.
Post it

>>26380871
We need to try it simultaneously to increase the likelyhood of at least one of us succeeding by overwhelming their communication lines.

Imagine you go into the bank and ask for them to switch your two halves of a 10 dollar bill into two bills and when they try to call teh president of bills and money they won't be able to connect because the teller I asked the same thing from is already speaking.

Then when mr president tells them "no that's fucking stupid how are you even working for us what the fuck?" and the teller closes the phone before the conversation escalates and tells me to fuck off with my half bills I fuck off and dispose of the half bills to remove any evidence.

Then we meet up and you give me one 10 dollar bill and you get the other and we part ways so that nothing ties us any more and hopefully we will never meet again.

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>>26379243
>Get plank of wood
>Drive a long metal shaft into one end.
>Grab onto shaft
>Jump off of board
>Carry board up with me
>Keep jumping
>Reach space
>Find some ayyliens
>Have great sex with qt alien girls