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*walks to the front of the lecture hall and...
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You are currently reading a thread in /r9k/ - ROBOT9001

Thread replies: 133
Thread images: 24
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*walks to the front of the lecture hall and pulls an AR-15 submachine gun out of his back pack*

REEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEE!!!!!!

Now that I have your attention, thank you.

Stand up, class. I want you to line up and I'm going to ask you each one very simple question. You see, I'm a reasonable man with a reasonable request.

Show me you're not a fucking piece of RANCID normie filth and I'll let you go. You have ONE minute before I put this nozzle up to your fucking noggin' and start spraying bullets into your skull cavity.

So, I ask you, why aren't you a FILTHY normie fucker?

*turns off gun safety*
>>
I'm a big guy for you, check em

>tfw no gf
>>
I've never had sex. I've never had a girlfriend and I've never even had a female friend. Shoot me if you want but I'll die knowing that I'm not a normie.
>>
>>26261023
Isn't an ar-15 an assault rifle?
>>
>>26261051
>>26261072
*nods*

Get out of here. You're safe. Good luck next penis inspection day.
>>
I pray to lord kek
>>
I'm frigid and can't feel sexual pleasure or arousal please kill me it might be a waste of bullets but you'll be doing the world a favor
>>
Shoot me please
>>
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>>26261023
>implying i'm a normie
But I want you to shoot me anyway.
>>
>>26261023

D-d-don't shoot I'm CIA.
>>
Kill me, please. Release me from this mortal coil.
>>
>AR
>sub machine gun

just using those media buzzwords wew
>>
>>26261023
when I poop my balls dip into the toilet water
>>
im a normie please kill me
>>
>>26261023
I've been a bullied virgin all my life. I now lurk /jp/.
>>
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>>26261023
I haven't left the house in 3 months. Mommy buys me fast food whenever I ask. I am a virgin and Kek be praised my dubs will save me you must check them.
>>
Unlike reddit trash like you, I don't use le epic frog memes and I use normalfag instead of the sjw approved word "normie"
>>
I like chicken tendies non ironically and always think of those greentexts when I eat them
>>
>>26261152
Apparently anything that can be shot more than 10 times without reloading is now a fucking machine-gun.
>>
>>26261095
BROTHER

KEK IS PLEASED BY THE SLAUHTEROF NORMIES
>>
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>>26261023
I have watched over 9000 animes
>>
I'm 5 foot 5 inches in height
>>
dude I haven't gotten laid I've only been to like 2 parties ahaha me and the boys just smoked weed last night ahaha I'm just here for the memes
>>
>AR-15
>Submachine Gun

I think YOU'RE the normie here, anon.
>>
I'm not scared to say nigger in public
>>
>>26261200
kek

I feel like OP would just let all the short guys walk out.
>>
I sleep with a waifu pirrow
>>
Huh.. sry kid but i always carry my katana digutsu around with me. Im to fast i would be behind you in an instant and cut your head off.
>>
>>26261236
what about the tan macho manlet with huge muscles and spiked hair who tries to compensate and thinks he is cool
>>
I have to wonder what I would be doing in a lecture hall but whatever.

>I have never been in a romantic or sexual relationship with another person and I never will.
>at this point I am fine with that.
>also I actually have been diagnosed with autism so even my doctors and teachers think I am not normal and never will be normal on a medical and mental level.

So do I pass?
>>
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This is a gun-free zone. You can't do that.
>>
i guess i'm not a normie, but can you just do it anyway? please?
>>
>>26261023
pull the trigger pussy end my miserable life so i dont have to do it myself later on
>>
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>>26261023
I'D OVERPOWER YOU AND I'M A NORMIE MUAAHAHAHAHAHHAHAHEHAWHAHEHAWHAHWHAHAHHAHAHAH (ENTIRE CLASS STARTS LAUGHING as you're arrested)
>>
>>26261023
I'm a normie but if you have another gun I'll help weed the others out before I kill you
>>
>>26261023
Free me from this hell
>>
>>26261262
What is this a map of?
>>
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I have hundreds of pictures of a fictional 2D girl from a japanese videogame series on my hard drive. I have written poems for her that she will never get to read, knowing that I will never hear her voice or see her smile fills me with deep despair.
>>
Nearly two decades into life
> never had gf
> have a few autist friends, play vidya
> never held hands
> never kissed
> barely talk to girls unless they want something from me
> have horrible oneitis
> drink myself to sleep occasionally
> racist as fuck
> However I'm a shitskin
> ugly, acne, Jew nose, manlet, skeleton
>a girl hugged me one time out of pity
> she fucks Chad now
> suicidal at the moment
> worst I've felt in a white
> thought oneitis liked me. Instead she wants to fuck my """friend"""

Just shoot me anyway
>>
>>26261023

>Show me you aren't
>Why aren't you

which one is it?

ya fucking faggot
>>
Here's my sketchbook full of dirty cartoon drawings. If you look on page 34, you can see this bear cub character I drew taking off her shirt, skirt and laced panties and spreading her sweet pussy. And if you turn to page 40 is a panda character wearing nothing but heart print panties. On my phone I have all these erotic stories involving various characters I made, and hope to some day make a comic involving these characters, but I know I never will because I never go through with anything.

Also, look at the pictures on my laptop. I have 34gb of fucked up fetish hentai shit, including my art folder of all the smutty cartoons I drew in Photoshop. I can make you a flash drive of it if you like them.

Also, I have never had sex, kissed a girl, or even hugged a girl passionately. I frequently post on /r9k/ sharing my failures as a human being, and I'm pretty sure I'll be dead within a few years anyway so go ahead and shoot me. Right between the fucking eyes. End my miserable pathetic life you cunt. Do it. Just fucking do it.
>>
>>26261313

Found it on /pol/ in an ideal America thread.
>>
>>26261212
>>26261152
>>26261093
they can be configured in a shitload of ways including smg
>>
I've only have had sex with 4 people
>>
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>>26261023
I have no friends, never had a gf, and spend ours at a time imagining what life would be like if I had been born generations ago when I would have been eligible for arranged marriages, because then I wouldn't be alone. I also daydream about being a Napoleonic or Victorian cavalry officer, an Orthodox Monk, or a Roman provincial governor. I have no hobbies besides history.
>>
I take anti-depressants and I wish I'd die in my sleep every night. Not so much since I started taking the SSRIs though.

Every waking moment is like a daze, I'm just going through the motions of my life.
>>
>>26261331
uh no, Delaware can fuck right off to blue nation.
>>
>>26261210
YOU WILL DIE NOW NORMIE SCUM
>>
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I'm a virgin, and one of my hobbies is writing C code in Vim. I also have complete several non normie anime series. I've only been browsing r9k for a year but painfully relate to it
>>
>>26261380

Delaware was literally a southern state that held slaves before the niggers came.
>>
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>>26261354
>I've only have had sex with 4 people
>only
>>
oh thank god

please kill me
>>
my girlfriend and i hate normies.
>>
>>26261336
Sub-machine guns are chambered in pistol cartridges. Unless you're talking about one of those goofy 9mm uppers, ARs aren't sub-machine guns.
>>
when I was 12 i memorized all different types and brands of forklifts, then I got my ham radio license.

normies don't have asburgers
I don't want to die (yet) (faggot)
>>
>>26261403
B-but only two were virgins, and one of the girls was black!
>>
>>26261401
fug off delaware fag
>>
I'm a manlet with acne problems, I have no friends and never had sex or a gf
>>
>>26261331
>Implying Idaho, Wyoming, Montana, Alaska, and the Dakotas wouldn't be on red team
>>
>>26261478

>implying I'm not from Texas

>>26261517

>implying I drew the map on ideological lines

Are you like Jewish or something?
>>
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>>26261023
I have over 250 hatsune miku songs on my android, around 25 albums. Do I look normie to you?
>>
>AR-15
lel get the fuck out or use a real weapon, cuckmando, your toys are no good here
>>
>>26261540
Then whats the point of the map?
>>
>>26261095
>>26261193
Hail Kek brothers
>>
I watch surgical videos for hours in my spare time. I fantasize about cannibalism. I've never had a friend, nor do I want any. I'm really not that afraid to die though, so if you want to shoot me, put two right through the forehead.
>>
I want you to shoot me
itd remove my lack of motivation and social skills from society
>>
I have a $4,000 anime figure collection.
>>
>>26261632

It's literally the Confederacy as far as I can tell
>>
autism truly is a frightening thing
>>
because I'm lonely even around people
(i like this thread a lot)
>>
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please end this suffering OP
>>
>>26261448
op very well may have been talking about such an upper on a full retard lower
make corrections when something is incorrect, not when something is goofy
>>
>>26261023
Can't you see I'm wearing sandals with socks?
Also, I look like a virgin so please don't kill me.
I can even help you sir. Can I call you Sir?
>>
>>26261170
Why are you in a lecture hall then?
>>
Im 5' 2".
>>
>>26261958
When something sounds that goofy, it needs correcting.
>>
>>26261171
>>26261242
>>26261262
>>26261329
>>26261354
>>26261410
>>26261421
>>26261288
*machine gun sounds*
>>
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I don't know it's not that i'm not fulfilled but it really is bothering me i think what i want is something genuine a meaningful relationship.

I get this relationship fever sometimes i thought i was getting over it but it when i see couples it worsens, i swear i was getting over it but honestly i'm dying for a fucking hug fuck i'm pathetic and i know dwelling on this will do nothing

Pic very fucking related just pull the fucking trigger already
>>
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>>26261023
>respond to question with similar expression of pic
>rush you
>start the form of a german suplex
>stop when i've got you grappled
>rub my hands up and down the inside of your thighs
>whisper in your ear
>this is perssonell
>Hurt me
>>
>>26261023
I'm ready to die. I hope I'm in the front row that day.
>>
>>26261023
I'm just auditing this class.
>>
because im handholdless and kissless.
>>
>>26261023
I actually want to help progress the human race and be a contributing factor to our ascent and place among the stars and not be a fucking waste of carbon like most people in this room.
>>
>>26261023
Im normie im living great life full of bitches and chads and parties. I have had 50 girlfriends. Shoot me please, please. I have passive income over 400000 per year also.
>>
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Because I want you to pull the trigger.
>>
I collect figures
I stay in my room all day and sometimes dont eat
I hate going to work
I-i never had a gf, or even held hands with a girl
>>
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>>26261023
>implying you wouldn't be doing me a favor
Pull the trigger, friend
>>
KILL ME FAGGOT OP, MANLET READY TO DIE
>>
If you had the balls to do it, you'd have gotten laid by now.
>>
I'm 21 and have been rejected/ignored/shrugged off by every single girl I've tried to start something with. No girl has ever shared mutual feelings of affection with me.
Kill me plox
>>
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>>26261023
>*turns off gun safety*
And then the police sniper on the roof across the street fires through the upper window, taking the top of your head off. Your body falls forward trailing a streamer of blood and brain material, making a wet meaty THUD as it hits the deck.
>>
>>26263351

"Just doing my job kid"
>>
I'm a suicidal Khv with multiple mental illnesses
Actually fuck it shoot me anyway
>>
>>26261831
Delaware is a liberal cuck state and is in no way a southern state fag
>>
all you'd have to do is look at me
>>
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>>26263351

OH yeah, remember all those school shooters stopped by police snipers?
>>
>>26261023

My gf tells me I'm so weird, and sometimes I post bold political statements on facebook.

Go on, pull the trigger. Do what I've been too chickenshit to do my whole life.
>>
>implying I'm in school in the first place
>>
>>26261023
Because I browse r9k regular and girl's aren't that intrested in me, I also don't like soccer and my life is the internet
>>
>>26261448
>>26262057
Today you learn about the Colt 635 and Colt 633. 9mm AR.
>>
i have 1400 pepe reaction images saved, but i stopped saving them when he become >le funny sad tumblr frog.

i'm working on smug anime grills, i have about 400 so far. it's shaping up to be a nice collection.
>>
>>26261023

I don't have to tell you...nobody sits near me because I'm socially outcast.
>>
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>>26261023
*clears throat* ahem

IIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIII LOOOOOOOOOOOOOVE YOU JEESUS CHRIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIST
JEESUS CHRIST I LOVE YOU, YES I DOOOOOOOOOOOOOOO
>>
>>26261023
Y-you too desu.
>>
>>26261023
*stabs you in the balls*
BACK THE FUCK OFF?!?
>>
>>26263351
Is that a FAMAS?

original desu
>>
JUST SHOOT ME

but before you shoot me, lets play https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=9dDtRtGdcZA over the university intercom system
it's my life wish
>>
>>26261336
youre a dumbass
>>
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>bro, just put the gun down, and I'll teach you how to b urself
>>
just kill me anon
end it please
why am i even here?
>>
>>26261023
olol
>>
This will be easy, I dropped out of college years ago, ill read about this later today on /pol/ probably with some half baked conspiracy about it being a false flag.
>>
I hate Anime
See? I'm no Normie
>>
>>26261023
I'm a 29 year old jobless NEET who masturbates to ever increasingly weirder Japanese manga
>>
>>26261330
Why the fuck would you use Photoshop? Illustrator was **literally** designed for that purpose.

Enjoy the bitter taste of the AR-15 round.
>>
>>26261093
>>26261023

Fucking retartds. A civilian legal (without tax stamp and peperwork) AR-15 can only be a semi auto rifle. Yes it can be an assualt rifle if it has a giggle switch and it can be a smg if chambered in a pistol calibre and is either full auto or has a giggle switch.

Pls go to /k/ and educate yourself
>>
>>26261189
A 1850s Spencer carbine is now a machinegun? Wew lad
>>
>>26261023
>AR-15 submachine gun

no
that's not correct
>>
>>26261023
Hahaha lil' autismo, kill yourself.
>>
>>26261023

I am a 29 year old NEET who looks a little more like Dr. Robotnik every day.
>>
>implying I don't want to die
>implying this many implicative implications in 2016
>>
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I-I'm not a normie because...
*Stands up*
LOOK IT'S THE POLICE
*you turn around*
*teleport behind you*
*unroll katana*
*stab you in the chest*
*look at you in the eye*
Pssh, nothin' personal, kid.
Mfw when
>>
Posting in le epic thread
>>
Do you have an extra gun I can use?
>>
>>26261023
I'm 38yo and I've never kissed, touched or had sex with a woman. I don't have friends and I'm unemployed. I'm an antinatalist and like reading hard-scifi and pessimist philosophers.

btw, do you have a spare gun?
>>
>>26266158
You saved us all anon!
*Stacy kisses you on the mouth*
A true hero! - Chad
>>
Gimme gimme chicken tendies
be they crispy or from Wendy's

REEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEE

At this point I will attempt to rip off my shirt, but I will not be capable of it, and then I will return to my seat glumly.
>>
I'm 6'2" have a girlfriend and a 8" dick.
I only come to this Mongolian Cave Painting subreddit for the dank memes and the Facebook frog.
>>
>>26261389
Why no emacs?
>>
>>26261023
I've never had a real gf, I've only had women who've wanted me for what little money I have.

One would constantly tease me about sex but we'd never get to it.
>>
>>26261257
fill him with lead. empty 5+ mags into his disgusting body.
>>
>>26261023
I am kissless virgin cuck, I have the high ground.
I've never even had a female friend. Now if you don't mind I'd like to go home so I can cry to pictures of girls I'll never have.
>>
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>>26261023
shoot motherfucker.
i've had enough of this life and i'm probably going to do it myself sooner or later so do it.
Thread replies: 133
Thread images: 24
Thread DB ID: 486373



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