>Asked how green texts work
>Thought everyone was making fun of me when they said I got trips
When I discovered /b/ I asked what CP was. Cue all the "Captain Planet", "Cheese Pizza", "Captain Picard" jokes. When a few people actually said "Child Porn" I didn't believe them.
admitted to being underage in my very first post.. years ago
That's funny, I witnessed someone do that about a week ago...
along with pic related pic related
me too, I was too afraid to post anything for almost a year (started lurking in '09). When I first came on here I had already heard some of the crazy stuff that happened on here I was afraid if i posted and someone didn't like what I said they would hack me and post all my personal information on the site. Then I learned you're all just as lame as I am and I felt safe and started posting
I made a post on /b/ with pic related, asking more people to post pics of Pizzas... I later found out the hidden meaning
captcha wanted me to select pics of pizzas...
I thought "sage" was an actual person who used that as an ID or something.
So naturally, every board and every thread I went to had someone saying, "Sage" and I would reply with "How many goddamn threads do you visit? It seems like you're on 4chan whenever I am".
It didn't go well. I also tried book marking threads too.
it took me months to learn how to reply a comment by clicking on the number, and i had to use urban dictionary on every word i didn't understand: kek, trips, fag, tfw, sage, mods, v&, dubs etc
>first time posting ('08 or something) I entered the name,email, and subject.
>using a tripcode generator to find funny tripcodes
>Had been on 4chan for 7 years
>Never really visited /fit/
>Decide to go one day as I have started attending the gym
>See a thread about being 'Natty'
>don't read it
>Assume it means 'Natty' as in 'Natalie' or 'Natalia' the girls name
>Get the idea in my head that you are supposed to ask muscular girls if their name is Natty and they will like you
>go to the gym the next day
>280lbs and only 5'6
>see a hot as fuck muscular girl
>confidentally stroll over to her
>'y-yoyouy-ou don't look like natty'
>she stares at me confused for a moment
>mock stutters and says 'well you do l-l-l-l-ook fatty'
>I get upset, pretend to laugh but leave the gym 4 minutes later
>go back on /fit/
>realise that 'natty' just means 'drug free'
>realise I must have upset her
>had to cancel gym membership and find another
I manually typed "Anonymous" into the name field a couple times.
Was I the only lucky one that starting lurking when hack threads were a thing? There were some great hacks to navigate 4chan, never fell for that triforce bs though, too computer savvy. Those free username/password for pornsites were also a thing, main reason I lurked when I was younger
> every board and every thread I went to had someone saying, "Sage" and I would reply with "How many goddamn threads do you visit? It seems like you're on 4chan whenever I am".
L M A O
Holy shit dude
Years ago, like 2008, after forever of lurking I made my first 4chan post.
>it was a fucking "the game joke"
>using Buddy Holly's song of the same name
>didn't use sage
>manually flipped through till I found it
When I first came here in 2006, I didnt know who this "Anon" was and why people kept talking to him..
I used to think everyone was acting retarded on purpose when they spoke about Heaven being a single person. Turns out a lot of people are just dumb as shit
Legit thought 4chan was a hacker website that would cause me to get vanned by the FBI.
I would always delete my search history afterwards and only right click on the pictures not the threads in fear that I would get a virus.
And once I figured out 4chan
>mom worked from home with work computer
>My PC was broken due to trying to download some nudist porn and getting a virus
>She went to bed and I went on her computer for a fap session
>/d/, futa, tranny porn and ladyboys for a good 3-4 hours
>Delete history and go back to bed
>Work computer is monitored by her work
>4chan flagged as paedophile website
>They confront her
>She confronts me
>I end up in tears of rage while she sits me down to talk about what I was doing
>end up having to tell her I like penises but only if they are on little girls not men and I was not interested in little children
>Mentioned that I wanted to suck a penis at one point during my tears of rage because I wanted to convince her I was no a pedo
>mfw the whole time
jesus fucking christ man, that is something
I am the original poster
The same guy who spent all of highschool in a drain pipe, pic related.
You still can but it's just harder to reach. You have to select legacy captcha in settings, open up a reply box and keep posting the wrong thing until google gives up and shows you a classic text captcha. It's absolutely retarded and I don't know why 4chan doesn't just use it's own version of captcha like many forums.
>Stop posting this stupid story
>Aren't you the sewer pipe guy too?
>Get help friendo
I am much past the point of where any help would make any difference in my life.
I am a loser who is approaching 30.
>tfw I've lurked for 5 years but am still too shy to post
I would go to school.
Sign into role call
Walk outside school about 2000m
Sit in that storm water drain for 6-7 hours then walk home
Every single day from the age of 15-18 till highschool was over for me.
But i also used a name for my first two posts
Once a month you needed to hand in homework for that month.
You could get an automatic pass just for handing in work regardless if it was right or wrong.
This is the only reason why I passed highschool.
I moved back to my home country after high school for university and I have given up on life. I have been enrolled in a 4 year degree for nearly 7 years living off the Australian government
How did you reply in the first place? Did you just click [Post a Reply] and hope the OC figured it out?
it wasn't in the faq in the past because I remember searching for it too specifically because I couldn't find it in the faq, only people who were familiar with phpbb style forums would have known how to do it.
that was true, you idiot, half the captcha always looked far worse so you could tell which they'd expect you to get correct, I filled in the worse one with "nigger" for quite some time.
I feel this anon, it was only halfway through last year when I got the courage to start posting threads, a few of them don't get replies and most of them only ever have like 5 people on them.
I moved to America from Australia during a very awkward stage of my teens.
I did not fit in with Americans and during my first day at school I crashed and burned in my first class. After that class I just walked outside due to overwhelming embarrassment and I just went there every day.
My teachers never noticed since they never even saw me except my role call teacher.
I just played gameboy all day while picturing life back in my home country.
Every now and then it would rain and I would go further into the drain pipe but that was the worst of it.
Once a year or so some kids would find me when they were skipping class and I would quickly run further down the road till they left and I would return to the pipe.
Missing out of these years of my life have caused me to be socially retarded, unable to communicate with adults or teenagers and I have an attraction to teenage girls from the ages of roughly 14-16. Even better if they have a futa cock.
I only like girls aged around 14-17.
I think me liking the dicks is because my cock is my only form of sexual contact.
I have masturbated about 2-3 times a day since I was 14 sometimes much much more. I have seen my cock so many times I now want to see cock on my woman.
I hopped on relatively recently, around April last year. Got here from
PTSand spent some time namefagging on /mlp/, and I was fucking insufferable, I was literally that one special snowflake who, whenever someone called me out on the namefag bullshit I said "FUK U I DO WUT I WANT" Eventually assimilated though.
Posted a thread on /adv/ when I was 15 and asked how to fix my depression and how much school sucked with age included.
>'it gets better when you're 18'
>tfw turning 20 in a month
I'm your kohai though. been here less then 1 year. "Refugee" crisis got me to /pol/ where i spend most of my memeing nowadays.
From somewhat social-democratic to traditional capitalist fascist in less then 1 year.
Go do something with your life mate i remember the drainpipe story and your one sad man
It's stories like this that make me want to be a teacher or someone just in a position to help.
I mean, fuck, how the fuck did no one realise there was a problem? What kind of failure of care is it to not realise there is a kid skipping classes for so many years?
All these people JUST learning how to spoil and not next level spoilering Just spoil my shit up
the whole sage=ID:Heaven was actually a feature on some 2ch boards as a form of politeness. On 2ch and other textboards sage is used as a sign of humility or to signify that your reply is irrelevant to the discussion at hand. The whole "heaven" thing is lost in translation but I think it's used to show since your reply is irrelevant, your identity doesn't need to be tracked for other posts in the thread. I also know that not all 2ch boards use the "heaven" thing at all. I'm actually not sure if it currently exists on 2ch anymore. I know that English textboards still use it though.
Source: I'm a fat weeb fuck with an unhealthy obsession with textboards. I'm also the one who keeps telling tokiko to fuck off (though I doubt anyone here remembers him).
>there's people who didn't lurk
To our newfriends, lurking is just a meme and I see this shit everyday here.
I posted in this kind of thread before and my most newfag thing is trying to learn how to greentext
somehow I came out with some code and I placed it behind what I wanted to say
something crazy like this. nice that no one pointed it out though.
>taking time to learn a culture when your posts are anonymous and can't be tracked back to you later
Literally why? The only place you should lurk before posting is /a/, and that's only because you'll likely be banned for making a rec thread otherwise
I thought you had to put sage in all fields and I tried it and it put my name as sage so I stopped trying to do so
back in HS we had a guy who was notorious for leaving math class after attendance and going to the bathroom with his ipod for 70 minutes playing music without headphones
We called him the musical shitter.
I defended 4chan whenever an anon would badmouth it or he threaten to leave.
I'm a raging newfag who came in 2011, but after 5 years now I can see what those anons were on about. I have no idea what 4chan was like 2006-2011 but it surely couldn't have been worse than this. Fuck this place.
I don't know how did I even come to 4chan and I certainly don't know why do I keep browsing it when I know I will always be an eternal newfag and I know that this place went to shit long before I came by.
I would readily leave if I could but I just can't.
Does anyone here fully understand the fortune thing on [s4s]? I know that you type fortune into the options field and that you can only do it once a day but for some reason it only works 10% of the time.
>>told people I came from Reddit when I first did
dear god you people are real, i thought it was just a meme
I thought sage was an admin that would go around trolling people in threads
For a while after I started posting, if someone started getting confrontational about my posts, I would just abandon ship and not visit the board for a few days just to be sure the thread was dead
>play warcraft 3 online, my first ever online game
>someone calls me a n00b for losing so badly in my first game
>have to actually ask what a n00b is
>some nice person says it means a newbie and explains how to play
>I think wow that guy was helpful and not mean like everyone else I will write down his username to ask him for advice in the future
>dont realize thousands of people play this game and I'll never see him again
>tell my parents I made a friend online
>they say he might be a pedophile so dont tell him my name or where I live
I've been on 4chan for 11 years (please end my life) and I still don't know how to make a tripcode.
Not that I would ever be a tripfag but there have been a few threads where it'd be handy to not have people impersonating me.
>Saved a bunch of stupid pictures like these
>Actually took part in this "operation"
>Hinted super obviously to my friends that I was a member of "Anonymous" but acted secretive about it
>Thought it was the coolest shit ever and I was cool for participating
I actually kind of miss those days tbqh
Using HOIC was a lot of fun back then but if you associated with that shit at all on social media or in real life you're retarded. There's a reason that it died and it's because people thought it was muh seckrit club and looked at it like the freemasons.
I remember feeling joy after the pages went down during LOIC raids. I did tell a couple of IRL friends about being a legion and shit, but only weird kids who were into video games. None cared tho. I think the reason anonymous died is because it went mainstream and associated to a really pathetic kind of person.
this is the worst shit you can do
don't fucking take 4chan culture outside of 4chan
the absolute worst is when i hear people making references to internet communities in real life. don't fucking say memes in real life holy shit
>eviscerate modern film-making techniques in a movie discussion with friends
>they all ask me how i got so knowledgable
>give them a vague response about how I use a "television and film forum"
>they press me for which one and ask if its r/film
>tell them i'd rather it remain anonymous