Lifes a bitch and then you die edition.
My waifu is pretty, oh so pretty and precious like a fancy rich person flower
I'm watching a super interesting animu lads, I highly recommend it.
Hey shoutanon, I ilke you, you do a great job on commentary with BFF, but don't be replying to that guy whose been trying to get his 'crazy person' gimmick over for the last couple of months. It is such a shit gimmick and such a shit trip that everyone in this thread has just ignored him so far, which is amazing really considering the amount of replies Tilde and Poleaboo get, it just goes to show how shit this bloke is. So just don't reply to him mate, I'm pretty sure he will go away soon but when you reply that encourages him to keep trying to getting the gimmick over for longer and longer here.
Here's something that might cure the itch
Here's my beloved waifu~
Whatever you say pham, regardless I still love her
I didn't even know there were other British threads here but fucking hell those guys are fedoracore fartknocking faggots.
>"You remind me off my mates they always do funny shit when wrecked like watching bizarre cartoons. Last night I went to the toilet at 4am, came back to the room and they were playing fucking Jingle Bells"
>"we usually watch David Attenborough, it gets trippy as fuck"
>"Ah. The rich tea worm burrows out of the shitheap it calls home long enough to spew derision at its digestive gods. Very well, very well."
Fucking hell what a set of cringeworthy cunts
So? It's not what it should be so take it back and just tell them it's no good and that they didn't give you a receipt.
If they still won't refund you, go back with a mate at 1am and put their windows through.
>you will never be present at a late 90's/early 00's suburban american house party
No senpai. You chose a spin-off show that's just fan service for people that loved the original Visual Novel Ilya appeared in.
No clue how you ended up choosing this apart from some lolicon instincts bubbling up inside you.
Hmm, seems mildly homophobic now, but yeah, great times.
>A guy you used to trade pokemon cards with now works in Asda and he came did the swipe thing when you were buying paracetamol but you didn't want to say anything but you both new
I wonder if he's got a Charizard, I never got one you see.
I used to enjoy drink/drug driving
Thankfully I never hurt anyone
I'm banned now so there's no chance of it happening again anytime soon
(I crashed into a brick wall at 60mph+) and walked out with a few cuts on my head, (wasn't even wearing a seatbelt)
Not sure how much harder I have to try desu
>not enough time to do anything worthwhile before bed
Funnily enough I'm actually a good driver been driving since I was 15 passed on my 17th birthday with no minors
I just drove like a cunt, litres of vodka handfull of pills grams of coke up my nasal
Half the time my intention was to actually crash, its a weird feeling being upside down after rolling down the road 3-4 times windows all smashed steering wheel/dashboard on top of you in and car full of smoke
>She changed her password AGAIN
She must be terrified, poor girl. Not sure if it was a joke but read something about her maybe dropping out of uni too.
I wrote a letter to my (Tory) MP last week.
I got a reply 4 days after I posted it saying they'd forwarded my concerns on to the minister.
I eagerly await my canned response regurgitating the party line and providing no useful information.
I whinged about the appalling road network where I live that's constantly screwed due to traffic congestion as there's been no increase in capacity despite a large population increase over the past 10 years.
It's a safe seat though, so it won't make any difference
But I inherently find that which is offensive to be unfunny, at least when the offense is of a "punching down" sort.
Which MP? If it's someone with a lot of responsibilities already, then they probably won't give a crap, but if they're relatively junior, or one of those mad ones that actually seem to care a bit, then you might be surprised.
Eddisbury represent btw.
Being a 16k wagecuck fucking sucks. I can't even get my own place so I can
have weird fetish sexin peace. Sick of house shares and bedsits and I'll literally never get a mortgage
Why does my grandfather overbuy stuff?!
I had a cold last week and asked him to pick me up some cold & flu tablets. He bought 16 boxes over the coarse of a few days. I only used 1 and put one in my work bag.
>But I inherently find that which is offensive to be unfunny, at least when the offense is of a "punching down" sort.
Christ are you sure this is the best website for you? There are more SJW friendly websites out there you might have a better time on.
I dunno mate you ask us this every other day and we still have no answer. Why don't you ask him yourself? He'll probably be able to provide a better insight into the inner workings of his mind than us.
Guys, I bought a bar speaker for my TV because it's not really loud enough and I can't get it to work.
It's basically a red and white audio in/out wire going from my TV out to my speaker IN but when I connect them the TV sound is still on and there is no way to disable the onboard sound.
I've seen these threads since the start, and never cared enough to figure out what this is. What the fuck is it?
I got a pay rise to the grand sum of 17k a while ago, its literally nothing.
>tfw realising you will have to live at home and never go anyone and just save money and you will be able to retire at 60
I have this trouble when I plug my headphones into the TV, I get the sound through my headphones but still also through the TV and there is no way to stop it.What the fuck is the point in that?
>Half the time my intention was to actually crash
There's a right time and place to do that and it's not on public roads: https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=Fe_DRcUR1CM
I am 50 and have been a "loner" pretty much all of my adult life, not necessarily by design but having moved from my hometown to London I never made the new links. The starkness of my "aloneness" was brought home when I was being discharged from hospital and had to literally sneak out because I had no-one that the ward fuhrer could hand me over to.
On the wider front, the constant attacks on the things that once fostered male camaraderie have done much to leave successive generations isolated, the collapse of the industrial base and the social fabric that went went it, and the creation of the "virtual world" will leave more and more men and women isolated in the future. Look to Japan to see how that is playing out.
In a western world that sees "difference" between men and women as an inequality to be erased and "male bonding" as an old boys network reinforcing "glass ceilings" and other nonsense it's a bit rich to suddenly get worried about the psychological effects of the anti-male campaigns of the last thirty years.....but only a "little" bit worried you can be sure.
I bleed every day because of you. I hope all this blood will show you how much I truly love you.
You see, you daft cunts think "offended" means I'm rolling about like fouled Diego Costa, but with bluer hair and more tears. I'm merely capable of recognising the harm homophobic slurs cause on a wider, more subtle, level, in preventing gays from being taken seriously. Or rather, allowing them to be dismissed more easily.
Oh, yeah, if it's an ultra-safe Tory seat she was probably just parachuted in as another sure bet when the tight votes come around.
>tfw your MP is called Antoinette Sandbach
I mean, Sandbach is weird enough because it's a whole town and already gives her a "I own human beings like property" vibe, but Antoinette is just bonkers.
DEMOCRACY IN ACTION!
Least you have dubs
And I've always wondered
What do hospital people say if you answer "No, I have no one to pick me up / look after me"
I've not been in hospikal since I was a kid so I've no idea.
I took 2 day off sick on the month I got my pay rise I actually ended earning less that month while people were saying it was good and a reward for being so good at my job.
I live with my parents as long as my brother becomes successful I can stay here forever
They roll their eyes and sigh inwardly because you just made their job harder, then they either call you a taxi or get the ambulance mini-bus thing to take you back, or if you are homeless/unable to care for yourself they hand you over to social services and shit, you usually get to stay in the "discharge lounge" for a while in that case.
I could have made you both so happy. Why are you torturing me? Will she ever know my name? Will she ever know the part I played in her life, Hannah? I sang her songs. I read her stories. I deserve to be part of your lives.
>You see, you daft cunts think "offended" means I'm rolling about like fouled Diego Costa, but with bluer hair and more tears. I'm merely capable of recognising the harm homophobic slurs cause on a wider, more subtle, level, in preventing gays from being taken seriously. Or rather, allowing them to be dismissed more easily.
No one uses homophobic slurs against actual gays though because in 2016 the year of our lord and saviour nobody cares if you like willies in your bum or not.
Gays shouldn't be taken seriously though, they're confused and dangerous degenerates who talk and dress funny.
They should be kept in medically induced comas and stacked up in those nuclear waste bunkers
>tfw /g/ recommends ThinkPads
>tfw get one for uni
>tfw when half of the class AND THE FUCKING TEACHER laugh at me in the lecture
End it all lads. I don't think it looks that bad, personally. I can post pics if anyone wants to see it.
Don't be horrible, she can't help her condition.
What does this mean?:
"While you see the sun setting, I see a sunset"
Yes they do, and even if they're used but not directed against gays, it still creates a less hospitable atmosphere for gay people. I'm not trying to police anything, but these are the consequences of using that kind of language.
>They should be kept in medically induced comas and stacked up in those nuclear waste bunkers
Top reply, desperatetobeoffendedlad.
Typical evangelical, trying to make your weird fetishes law.
>you didn't turn it around on them and make them all feel like horrible insufferable arseholes by pulling the PRIVELEGE card
Because the only reason you got that big clunky old box is being a poorfag, am I right? Use their student lefty guilt against them.
I've finally met a girl I like and who was at least at first interested in a relationship and now I might as well be headbutting a fucking wall.
One dates a personal best anyway guys. At least that's what I said until it dragged on past a few weeks.
I honestly thought I was past falling for girls like this.
My love life hasn't changed at all since high school except back then I was batting out of my league and now if anything they're getting a good deal.
>Yes they do, and even if they're used but not directed against gays, it still creates a less hospitable atmosphere for gay people. I'm not trying to police anything, but these are the consequences of using that kind of language.
No they don't mate. Gays are human beings like me or you not a fucking protected species. They aren't going to get upset and need you to shelter them because someone used the word bender least of all in the context of a joke.
I tried to paint it digital winter camo and I think it turned out alright
Fuck off Mohammed I'm not trying to make you laugh go pray to a fucking Karan
But it wasn't "in the context of a joke", it was the implication that you're a "poof" if you don't watch Pokemon, which would be telling, on some level, it's okay to single out others in a homophobic way.
If anything there is untrue, then... well, actually it's just not, I'm right and if you disagree you're wrong again.
Obviously not, it's midnight, Asda just shut, dickhead.
I literally said so are we gonna meet up this weekend, she said should be able to I'll let you know, then I said ok make sure you do because I'm autistic and need to plan my schedule well in advance
I was so close lads, so close.
CONGRATULATIONS, YOU PLAYED YOURSELF.
>least favourite gimmick
My fav is poleaboo cause he's an absolute legend. Least favourite is diabetes kid since he fucks up the threads with his autistic rants
THATS WHY WE GET HIGH
CAUSE YOU NEVER KNOW WHEN YOUR GONNA GO
GOD THIS ALBUM IS OFF THE RAILS
Just stop, I don't want it. I know that you'll try to tell me something uplifting or tell me that I'm a good person but I'm not. I hate myself I hate the way things are, and I want to die. I deny it every time it's brought up but I want to die. I fantasize about it, I'm a sick fuck. I think about all the ways I can die. I'm sick of where I am in life and I know that thing's aren't going to improve. Even if I get a job so fucking what? Even if I go through college and get a degree so what? I'm tired of living.
I feel like complete fucking shit
I work a shitty part time job, in a gym where I'm alone for almost the entire shift because it's right out in the sticks. When I'm not working I'm at home alone, or I go to the gym where I'm alone. I literally feel fucking empty and it's at the stage now where even when I'm with mates at the weekend the feeling doesn't go away. I can physically fucking feel it, like butterflies when you're nervous, only it's all the time and and I just feel fucking hollow
Applied for apprenticeships on the basis that maybe I won't feel so goddamn awful if I find a purpose in life and I've failed to land any of them.
Can't even talk to anyone about how I fucking feel because the last career I feel is open to me is the army and they don't let depressed people in there, so I can't risk being branded as that. Odds are I'd just puss out of training anyway
Been thinking of suicide more and more, mum's a psychotherapist though and I don't want her to lose her reputation because she failed to spot her own kid was suicidal
Literally just counting the days till I stop giving a fuck about that or this fucking feeling pushes me over the edge
Don't even know why I'm typing this shit but maybe it'll feel better to vent
You stupid dickhead, you're just regurgitating talking points even thought they make no sense in the present context.
The problem with homophobic language is that it enables people to dismiss and belittle gays and think it's okay.
Fuck me, you are properly thick.
Yeah, but it's about whether or not you're punching up or down. You punch down, "ahaha, look at that stupid Somali cunt, look how dead her baby is, ahaha", that's just cruel laughter and you're a twat. But like I just did, you can say something outlandish and on the surface "offensive", but it's the way it's contextualised.
It's not my favourite rap album, thats pic related, though Illmatic is still fucking sick. Still have a lot of classics still to listen to though.
Excuse me the word 'stupid' is offensive to people with lower IQs, I would appreciate if you could not use it and I will be reporting you to the cyber police.
>The problem with homophobic language is that it enables people to dismiss and belittle gays
And as I just said, gays dgaf. I don't view gays as some vulnerable children that need protecting. They are human beings. They'll live.
>and think it's okay.
Yes because the few genuinely homophobic people out there, most of which are in the religious community, would all disappear if we ban the phrase 'knob-jockey'.
You really are an arrogant prick. I love patronising SJWs are to the people they are 'protecting'. The irony of it all.
>my vagina when someone says they like doom
Come feel with me, /Brit/bots.
I dont want to feel this feel
i get what you mean that it feels like a personal attack because it insults you personally. like it would a black person when someone says thieving black bastards.
but there should be a level, one that says its too far. saying "well of course hes not black he can swim" isnt that offensive it can be funny in the right context just as saying "i can hear your arsehole whistling" is fine but "dirty limp wristed faggot" isnt. is there a level for you?
LO ND O N O N D O N
I'm sorry, meme is mandatory. Though you're probably a dude anyway.
Is it okay for Amerifats to post in Britfeels? We don't have anything like it except for the Frog and Feels which hasn't been open in awhile.
>fap to weird shit
>feel immediate disgust and shame after
Thank you Anon, I've just been on a streak of bad luck
since the day I was born.
>They wear oversized clothing
Don't worry dude, that was 13 years ago. They now all dress like this.
It's Tuesday. How are you going to change the world today?
So i've got a fwb thing going on lads, i've seen her tonight and her aunt is giving her a load of baby clothes. It's obvious she actually wants a kid with me.
Idk if she wants me to be a father but I don't want to be 4eva alone, should I bite the bullet and just do it?
get outta there mate she's not stable
you might play happy families for the first year or two but she'll dump you for someone else and you'll still have to pay her child support
simply not worth it, if you can marry her and get a prenup with a no cs clause then that's the way to go
I know she's unstable but so am i, she doesn't know im autistic as fuck. But tbf she actually went a wedding fair this weekend. Is a few years with a family better than a lifetime alone?
Waste of time, facebook isn't letting me into the account without using a known browser, I think she's only recently turned on those settings so the only known browser is the facebook app from her iphone
uh, no, those aren't related to the people I'm chasing
If you could hit me with information on simulating the facebook app on an Windows computer than thinks it's an iPhone though that'd be great
I'm a very mentally ill man. I am in love with a girl who hasn't spoken to me in nearly three years. She used to frequent these threads, so I post here every day thinking she will see me.
The logical side of my brain knows that what I am doing is sad and fruitless, but I still feel compelled to do it.
>simulating the facebook app on an Windows computer than thinks it's an iPhone
There isn't an iPhone emulator, the one on OS X isn't an emulator it's actually the whole of iOS compiled to x86 and it compiles your apps to x86 to run on it so you'd need the actual facebook app sourcecode to run it.
I get you, lad, in a similar situation.
Does having the accounts and keeping up with her, ease the pain?
I'm reading a fair bit about iphone emulators and simulators right now
Going to pull and all nighter since I'm fucked after tonight
I want her to speak to me. I want to have a conversation. A year ago, she assumed I was dead after a failed suicide attempt, and was laughing about it here. I guess ruining her life would work too.
I'm going to be posting there as well.
I just want to know what's going on in her life. I guess part of me wants to know if she's as miserable as I am.
I'm sure there's a site that finds all the sites she signed up to with that address
that's the first I've ever heard of it I only knew her for a very short amount of time
It's far from a normie family. She has a severe mental illness, she tried to smother her baby. For a year or so after the child was born she was only allowed supervised visits. I'm not even sure if her and the father are together still.
Borderline Personality Disorder. Definitely sickly, definitely not a loner. She has family and friends and she comes to these places to get attention and have her ego stroked.
I'm just one of the idiots who got trapped in her web.
Fuck all in the account but it's a paypal account, it draws funds from the connected back account
Seriously though, bro, text ON to 32665 and give me the code, I'm on EE and they've literally stopped compatibility with facebook sms
Is that the response you got back?
eh, I guess you can't do it without her details on your end.
I'll just have to wake up in 3 hours and borrow a family members phone
You always need to confirm your identity before buying
>Last thing my friend sent me before his internet presumably died was "masturbate to me"
I ain't gay but I am slightly aroused ngl
>tfw no skater slag gf
>tfw you will never be the keyboard player from Rammstein
>I have woken up and had breakfast
Is this what its like to be normal?
Having breakfast, check facebook and see this shit
Down syndrome model...
>changing society's perception of beauty one photoshoot at a time
Why do people think that if you take high quality photos of mongs or fatties, that people will start thinking they're beautiful?
Are they so stupid as to think that we don't already know what we consider beautiful and then take pictures of it because its beautiful? Have they really fallen for the "social conditioning" meme?
>tfw a downie is more normie than you
Probably had sex too.
>Have they really fallen for the "social conditioning" meme?
So yesterday a girl made me feel so hard
I could barely sleep
I'm just going to lift the pain away but I have no appetite, just going to eat a load of dextroamphetamine workout and then sit in a sauna for a few hours, hopefully I'll meet zyzz while I'm in there
>fill my tummy up!
>give me extra cheese!
I cringe so hard I laugh and cry
Where is the fucking postie, I'm getting too fucking anxious. There doing work on the house next door and they're really loud, scared I'll miss him knocking or that he'll wait like 2 seconds and vamoose. Tracking isn't even working it's all fucking over lads.
How long should I wait to hear back from an interview?
It was on the 15th, they said I'd hear by Tuesday (19th) but I've yet to hear anything. Reckong I should give them a bell or just wait?
Postie came lads, no PS4 but I did get a game for it, what is this shit the PS4 was sent special delivery, is there a different postman for large parcels?
Can spy the postman on his way with my cosy pills
Tattoo is starting to peel and get a bit itchy now, this part is worse than actually getting it done desu
Thought I'd lost/killed my bird just now.
He flew up towards my curtains but he's a retard and usually falls down the length of them and at the bottom is a radiator which he is small enough to fit between.
Spent 15 minutes turning my room upside down and hear him chirping from inside my fucking wardrobe.
heres something that you can do in future when you think that your bird is dead and not actually just in your wardrobe that my mum told me one day when i thought that my dog killed a bird in the garden.
i was in the living room eating weetabix and my dog was in the garden plyaing with a toy and i thought id have a watch of him for a bit and then i seen it was a bird nd not a toy.
i went outside and tok it off the dog and give it to my mum who told me to wash my hands i was upset because the bird was dead but she said that she would give it whiskey and that helps it and gives it energy o be alive properly again.
she too kit outside and said that it flew off after a bit so keep some whiskey handy and try not to drink it one day like if youre depressed or something and just have it in case of a bird emergency.
If you even hear back that is. Most places dont even have the common decency to inform you if you've failed. Out of about 20 interviews I had in my period as a NEET I only heard back from a single interview and that was the position that accepted me. Fucking bullshit.
DUBS 33 44 55 YEAH!
FUCK SO CLOSE TO 66 AND 77
>get nice new shoes
>post them on /r/sneakers
>mfw people keep posting ugly as FUCK ultraboosts day after day that always reach the top
What pisses me off even more is that you can make a totally normal, non-malicious, non-triggering thread and you get cunts that will downvote it so people don't see it and not even have the decency to comment after they've fucked you in the ass.
AF1 Flax. Really nice, good quality which is surprising for Nike.
Bottom row are gym shoes.
I'm a brit and there are only 5 Nike.
Adidas has been killing it lately though.
I wanted these but I can't really afford them atm. I could buy them but it would take me into my overdraft until I get paid...
The only nice Adidas are OGs
They look fucking disgusting you should be ashamed
>this cunt with the AF1 flax still thinks his choice creps is good
>still seeking approval because he's an insecure little fuccboi
>wonders why he gets down voted
O I am laffin
>people that spend more than 30 quid on a single pair of shoes
Literally a waste of money
>phish her email password
>wait until midnight to login
>fail due to different IP/device
>she is altered to this
>google suspends her account
>deletes 2 years worth of emails from her inbox
>phish her facebook email
>she changes it too quickly for me to use it
>use her secondary email to access for facebook
>do it midday because I'm not sure it'll work and the opportunity might disappear
>she's onto me in 10 minutes and I get kicked out
>she changed her email password and facebook 3 times in the next few hours
>I wait until she goes to sleep
>using all the info I've gathered and a new tool I can use gmails account recovery
>have access to her email now
>fuck all in there, some useful info though for future plays
>turns out she's dropped out of uni
>she's in the process of getting out of her lease
>know her address
>reset facebook pass
>she's enabled phone verification
>can't fucking do anything
Feel a bit guilty though
You're completely the victim mate. I mean you're such a victim that you're trying to hack into her facebook and get more info to stalk her.
I totally side with you, you paki twat.
Riddles are abound tonight,
Since the wizard's taken flight.
By the shroud of mystery,
Go to be serenity.
Open hearts are numb to pain
While open minds fill up of strain
If they cut this pie in two,
I'd still give both halves to you.
Huh Aww Yeah!
Take the man that fills the throne,
Contemplate his time alone.
Add a dash of little boys,
And watch the buzzards tear away.
PHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHA PAKIAPOO GOT CAUGHT OUT.
Who do you think will be the prime suspect you fucking sperg.
Have some prime poojeet OC because im happy. Good day 2bh