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>Anon, we're gonna go pick up chicks...
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You are currently reading a thread in /r9k/ - ROBOT9001

Thread replies: 185
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>Anon, we're gonna go pick up chicks bro. Get in!

What would you do?
>>
>>26003993
>automatic

No thanks.
>>
Firebomb their car.
>>
>>26003993
>o-okay chad
*kneels in the leg room in front of him*
>>
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>>26003993
I would hop in the car.
>>
I look like marilyn manson why would you wanna hang out with me
>>
>>26003993
Fuck you misogynist fuckers are women objects you can just pick up?
>>
Make an lame excuse. Either that I'm feeling sick or have homework to do
>>
>>26004059
Don't ask questions, cuck, just seize the opportunity!
>>
>>26003993
>Okay Chad!
Chad is the bro I wish I had, guaranteed fun times and panic attacks.
>>
>I-I can be your sissy trap fuckthing if you'd like chad
>>
okay..
>gets into the trunk of the car
>>
>>26003993
>Let's go faggots!
>btw are you two brothers? You look identical.
>>
>>26004123
Why did I even laugh at this?
>>
>>26004060
Thanks tumblr. You can leave now.
>>
>>26003993
This is a trap! You just want to use me as the butt of some cruel joke! LEAVE ME ALONE REEEEE!!!!!!
>>
>>26004164


Chad and Brad. Identical twins.
>>
>>26004213
and you can call me...sad
>>
>>26004012
this guy.
he knows what's up.
>>
k.
>Then I get in
>Then I ride with them to where ever
>Then I poop in their backseat after we all get out
>hang out for a bit, more than likely get used as the guy who gets the ugly cock-block friend
>Call Uber and take that home with the ugly chick
>Sacrifice her to the old ones preserving my virginity and ensuring my wizardhood
>but not before getting a kiss in, awe yea
>Those chicks the chads picked up wont be sleeping with them tonight, not with a massive shit smeared on the entire back seat
>Smile smugly knowing I have cock-blocked chad, pleased the old ones, and got my first kiss

And the best part is chad will never get that smell out!
>>
>>26003993
I mean, if I know and trust these fellas, then yeah sure. Sounds like a good fucking time, worst case scenario I get a story out of it.
>>
>>26003993
punch him in the face and tell the other guy to gtfo
the car only have two seats
>>
>>26003993
Mc Donalds shirt...
>>
>>26003993
>mfw I went out with some Chads one time and actually ended up with fingering some chick who later became my gf

You can make it guys.
>>
>>26004165
haha xD
>>
>>26004257
So you're the ugly cockblock friend then?
>>
>>26003993
I use the opportunity to ask them to hook me up with some roids
>>
>>26004301
This is why Chads actually make really good friends, but only the Chads that are actual bros and see women as objects.h
>>
>>26004301
This.
But the real robots here literally can't leave the house without sperging like retards. Most of us here are introverted normies that are just a little weird and are too hard on ourselves.
>>
>ok
>get in car
>completely aware that I'm being fucked with
>they might beat me up or have a Stacy laugh at me
>don't care, already at rock bottom
>let them pull their lame joke on me
>this is the only way I've ever interacted with other people my age
>letting them fuck me around
>>
>>26004257
>Chad will simply have his father by him a newer model.
>the bitches will think the shit is Chad's anyway and develop a scat fetish.
You can't beat Chad.
>>
>>26004324
indirectly... yes
>>
>>26003993
Sorry dude, I've got a girlfriend
>>
>>26004298
>you will never be a real life walking ad and get paid to just wear t-shirts with logos on them
>>
>>26004352
thats fucked bruh, i would take you clubbing and gurantee you a good time, get u nice haircut and some clothes and just put some mollies in ur system for some good vibes.
>>
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>have 3 super close friends in HS who we all spent every second we could hanging out
>playing video games and watching anime and stuff
>we all graduated, i decided to not go to college and they went
>they turned into super-Chads and lifted, got gf's, extremely normie
>they still always ask you to hang out and always show up at my house regardless
>still ask me to come play games with them

i just wish i wasn't socially retarded
>>
>>26004352
Anon you need to go to a music festival.
It will reinstill your faith in the good of humanity.
>>
>>26004512
Don't we all anon

Oc
>>
>>26003993
No chad
>>
>>26004363
He's a guy with abs and a nice car, not fucking Donald Trump
>>
>>26003993
>There are guys that look like that while I'm stuck looking like me
Lol jfmsu. Idk why roasties and normalfags get upset about me withdrawing from society when there's no way i could compete anyways. Just let me enjoy my loli animes in peace.
>>
Fuck it. Worst case scenario, I get fucked-up and have a laugh with some alpha bros. I'm getting in if it's offered like this.
>>
>tfw no chadbros
>>
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>>26003993
>get in car
>saying no is no longer an option
>stare vacantly without saying anything
>laugh when it feels necessary despite not understanding what the nature of the conversation is
>"T-thanks I-i had f-fun"
>avoid seeing said chads at all cost
>>
why is the wheel on the right side of the car?
>>
>>26004012
My thoughts exactly. Dead giveaway that these guys are Americans who can't drive for shit
>>
>You guys smoke
if yes go
if no go anyway
>>
>>26004720
>get my obese lard acne ass in the back
>get ashtmah attack
>chad is like whats wrong
>i shit my pants and it lands and stains his seat
>chad punches me and throws me in the highway
>mfw atleast a ruined his car
>>
>>26004755
They're some pathetic yurofags. No amount of lifting will make up for their lack of freedoms.
>>
>>26003993
suck their dicks
>>
>>26004567
Chad is a marysue unless otherwise specified in the OP.
>>
>>26004945
That's vulgar! You need to bathe in holy water.
>>
Magdump
>>
>>26003993
>How on earth did you manage to catch me in the 10 seconds I'm outside. Are you stalking me.

>Also, I don't "pick up chicks". I dont know how. Thats not my thing.

>Also I don't know you. I'd rather play video games. I'm straight edge. I'm shy. Don't try to hang out with me. Good bye.
>>
>>26005050
You sound like a huge faggot Anon
>>
get in the backseat of the car and constantly REEEEEE until we crash and die in a glorious hell blaze
>>
>>26005065
Thanks fag.
>>
>>26005050
this is the kind of people that roam this board now? really? redditors?
>>
>>26004824
>americans
>right hand drive
>>
I call shotgun.
>>
>>26005124
I noticed this too senpai but they look american as fuck.
>>
>>26003993
BRAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAP

excuse me, I had to fart

BUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUURP

OH DEAR, guess I have the gas today fellas

ACCCCHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOO

excuse me, I'm allergic to grass
>>
oh chads you are so perfect
>>
>>26005151
There's a Chad already sitting in the passenger's seat.

Unless you intend on sitting on that Chad's lap...
>>
>>26005121
Don't know what made you claim that but you're not wrong. First time I've been called out on it in the year I've been here.
>>
>>26005178
at it is a mustang

so most likely australians
>>
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>>26004168
stop being a fagarino
>>
>>26005124
>>26005178
They're actually from South Africa
>>
T-thanks guys...h-here i go!

* crawls into trunk *
>>
kek I have the same retard-looking face as the one closest to the camera
If he wasn't jacked and rich he'd be incel.

>>26005242
scratch that he looks less retarded here.
>>
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>>26003993
>looking like that
>chicks

riiiiiiiiiiiight...
>>
>>26005327
gib source famalam
>>
>>26003993
They seem like pretty cool guys, and I'm up for some fun so I'm in
>>
>>26003993
Thanks for the feels OP
>freshman year
>two chadbros for roomies
>hang out all the time
>smoke dope, go to parties
>I'm a normie!
>both have terrible grades
>don't come back next year
>tfw no more chadbros
feels bad
>>
>>26004531
>music festival
Fuck off. Get a haircut, hippie.
>>
>>26004100
i hanged out with chad and semi chat until i slowly became a chad cyborg
so fucking worth it.
>>
>>26003993
I'd get in. Some Chads are actually really fun to hang out with, and just watching/talking to them can improve your own social skills a lot.
>>
>>26005558
>tfw chad changed my life
>>
>>26005242
>you will never be a 6'2 buff aryan superman
what's the fucking point, at least i won't reproduce
>>
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>>26004123
i kek'd hard

>>26005050
that wasn't funny nor a display of being alpha, kill yourself faggot nu-male retard

pic related, its where you came from
>>
>best scenario
I get pussy and friends with chad

>worst scenario
I get made fun of and laughed at like every other day
>>
>>26005594
>at least i won't reproduce

This actually gives me comfort. It puts all my fears of not being good enough to rest. I know I'm not good enough so I carry on with my life.
>>
>>26005618
I was being serious. And beta. Cause thats what I am.
>>
>>26005242
Fuck I'd kill to look like the guy on the left, perfect male specimen would go homo for him
>>
>>26004012
Automatics are faster than manuals.
>>
>>26005920
just kill yourself

have you ever driven a car? or are you underage?
>>
>>26006034
I have driven cars. I drove a 911 with dpk. Manualfags btfo.
>>
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>>26004426
>I'm not like those other guys
>>
>>26005242
some people are just born to get laid
>>
>>26005920
>>26006055
yea dude video games dont count

if you have actually driven a manual car and have a license you wouldn't have said this piece of cancer comment
>>
>>26006175
I did anyway lol

My taste is better kiddo
>>
>>26004168
>what are jokes?
Anon, please tell me this is some kind of ruse
>>
>>26006175
>some 18 year old manualfag with a suped up Mazda 3 acting like he knows anything about high-quality transmissions

I'll grant that most automatics aren't optimized for sanic.jpg speeds, but high performance automatic transmissions can consistently outperform manuals. It depends a lot on torque optimization. Many high-quality production cars have semi-automatic transmissions and they're usually faster than manual transmissions (because the computer can react faster to a simple paddle flip than a human can mash in a clutch and shift gears).
>>
>>26004012

The first post is yet again the best post
>>
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>>26006137
That's pretty much the gist of natural selection.
>>
Ignore and walk away. Knowing 4chan, I well might end up victim of a human trafficking ring if I board that vehicle.
>>
>>26005242
>>26006348

yea but even the freaking hair is perfect with the gel. I mena the abs i get it , cardio plus sit up, low fat diet . but how dont these guys even have a freaking bad hair day, or the beard how is it so even . its like destiny says "here everything will be perfect for you " i bet they even have above avg dick sizes
>>
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>>26006668
Being a Chad must be the greatest feeling a man can experience. True euphoria.
>>
>>26006318
>but high performance automatic transmissions can consistently outperform manuals.
>Many high-quality production cars have semi-automatic transmissions and they're usually faster than manual transmissions (because the computer can react faster to a simple paddle flip than a human can mash in a clutch and shift gears).

Okay, you're going to need to clarify here. Are you talking about paddle shifted cars, or just plain automatic cars? Because they're completely different animals.

It's disingenuous to say "automatics are faster than manuals" when you're actually talking about paddle-shifted cars.

When you say "automatic" 99.9999% of people are going to assume you're talking about press-gas-pedal-down-that's-all-you-do transmissions.
>>
Most Chad's are actually decent people.
Fun to hang around unlike vapid Stacey sluts.
>>
>>26003993
Radical bro!
-hops in because I look like these bros so this would be an awesome bro time with some babes-
>>
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>>26006668
so fucking close

>>26006771
bro just ignore the kids , they played gt and think they are the shit
>>
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Drop a cluster bomb in backseat
> inb4 don't know how hurr durr
>>
I've had this kind of situation happen before in HS with chads from my football team
>tell tons of jokes to chads and make them laugh
>talk big about getting ass
>arrive at party/club/bar
>get freaked out about talking to females
>a group of grils approach us
>not even the ugly one in their group will talk to me
>I just drink in the corner until we go home
>>
>>26006901
kek

that's what you get for being a pretending faggot
>>
Hop in, get drunk af snif some shit and start talking why Hitler was right till some white knight spanwns and hopefuly put him in the oven too :DD
>>
>>26006668
people dont let bad pics of themselves go viral
>>
>>26006668
Because in most cases where you see people in pics that get called chads, they're models of some kind, often in shoot.

>>26006348
This is clearly a model, for example.

Dunno about the two earlier up, but even then, you're seeing two photos of them, you have no idea if they have bad hair days or not, they nearly definitely do.

Don't compare yourself to models though, they don't even look that great.
>>
>>26003993

Sure thing bro!

Just so we're clear he's talking about gay sex right? Like one of them is going to fuck me in the ass while I suck the other's cock? That's what he's getting at, yes?
>>
>>26007317
>>26007350
nah man , i knew a couple chads in school every day their hair was perfect the same , same thing in the gym i went a couple times , chads there had the same look every time , same hair. not even one freaking pimple, or the hair combed to the opposite way . i dont believe in x shit but the older i get the more im starting to believe that some people are just meant to win
>>
>>26007492
Some people just put more effort into it as well, don't forget. There is a genetic component, and some styles are easier to keep than others, but there's a large effort component.
>>
>>26003993
>3 guys
>4 seater car
Someone didn't think this through.
>>
>>26004100
>fun times and panic attacks.
This nigga gets it.
>>
>>26003993
Winkle at them before they voss away
>>
>>26007492
people use gel to get their hair to stay a certain shape
>>
>>26007766
>>26005297

Tbhdesusempai
>>
>>26007847
every time i tried gel it still would look a bit different
>>
>>26007896
You'd probably need to use stronger gel. You should talk to a proper stylist and get their opinion on what product type would work best.
>>
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>>26006348
that's social Darwinism you're describing fucktard
>>
>>26004531

This. I felt all of my social anxiety disappear as soon as I entered the festival. Going again this year (It's bonnaroo, if you were wondering)
>>
>>26005242
/r9k/ in the middle
>>
>>26006034
>>26006055
>>26006175
>>26006318

>HURR DURR CARS ARE FASTER LOL
>Caring
>Current Year

Stop existing
>>
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>>26003993

>What would you do?

Jump in and pull bitches with Chad and Bruce.
>>
>>26008261
Kek, this.

Why the fuck do people boast about how fast a car they don't even own can go, when they'll never be able to go any higher than 100km.
>>
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>>26003993
Tell this faggot to stop skipping leg day

How the fuck does he not just always fall over with those chicken-ass legs
>>
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>>26008304

>wanting disproportionate legs

muscular legs are ugly as fuck m8

>mfw I never do leg day because dont want to be ugly hulk abomination
>>
>>26008324
Muscular legs are fucking great though, what are you talking about?

Having a disproportionate body either way looks shitty, but having noticeably muscular legs as well as a muscular torso looks best.
>>
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>>26008324
It's about balance m8. Not saying you should focus on legs but if you skip leg day everyone's laughing at you because you look like some retarded cartoon character Johnny Bravo motherfucker with this bulky upper-body supported by some pathetic little chicken legs
>>
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>>26005050
you sound like a gigantic faggot m8
>>
>>26008324
My leg day is
5 sets of deadlifts for 5 reps (3 normal 2 sumo)
glute bridges
leg curls

basically you want to work glutes and hams with only a little bit of work on quads
dats how you get aesthetic legs
>>
>>26008186
it literally isn't.

you're thinking of sexual selection
>>
i'm a married man, chad. but i guess i can go out for some drinks and be your wingman.
>>
>>26004257
>k-kissing a g-g-girl
>appeasing the old ones

not likely
>>
i already have one but i'll still come with
>>
>>26004257
>Chad wants to be your friend
>decided to take chads friendship and throw it in his face

What did Chad ever do to you?
>>
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>>26003993
But i can't pick up chicks with you guys because i am an ugly manlet. You are only asking me just to drive away and laugh at my misfortune by birthright anyway, you are not my friends or wingmen. Hope you crash somewhere with your fancy car and die in the fire.
>>
>>26005327
holy shit pls source
>>
Chads actually aren't as bad as we make them out to be.
Roasties however.
They are satan even well after high-school. And they don't do it to impress, they do it because of their nature of pure evil.
>>
>>26003993
>get in
>then got fuck in the ass
i ain't falling for that shit again
>>
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>>26009780

>again

Do share.
>>
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s-sure thing s-sir. D-do i go into the trunk? I-i hope my chinkiness doesnt ruin your style
>>
>>26010107
>not posting Elliot

You fucked up, son.
>>
>>26009772
Yeah, most chads are actually pretty nice guys, that tend to be popular because they bring people up with them. It's the people a step below that chad level, and stacies that are the cunts, people that tend to derive value from making sure everyone else is below them.
>>
>>26005920
>>26006055
>>26006318
>>26006771
fuck off autotragic cukolds

sequential manuals shift as fast as DCTs and are lighter and more reliable

now kill yourselves faggots
>>
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>>26010518
S-sorry boss
>>
>>26008233
r9k wishes they were that confident and good looking.
>>
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>>26010107
>>26010725
Hah, it must suck being a shitskin pham.
>>
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>>26010867
Indeed it does QQ
>>
>>26005920
>you can only drive automatic
>>
I shout "Awww yeah!", make a monkey noise and then vault into the backseat.
>>
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>>26010902
STOP ALEXPOSTING REEEEEEE
>>
>>26004345
reeee etc
Original edition
>>
>>26005920
Actually, manuals are far faster, since you can force them to stay in a lower gear, which all have increased rotational momentum at the cost of straining your motor more.
>>
>>26003993
>automatic
>McDonalds t-shirt
>"pick up chicks"

Only one chance at being a Chad and they fucked it
>>
>>26006348
Check out this hot nerdy introvert
>>
>>26005050
Nigga, this is the gayest shit I've ever read
>>
>>26008209
More like BONEROO
>>
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>>26003993

This has happened a few times and I said no. A few times, girls showed interest (what are you doing later/this weekend, other blatant flirting, etc) and I just brush them off.

Later on the occasional gay would hit on me and I'd politely turn them down. Turned out they were sent by people in my circle to basically do recon to see if I was gay, because they figured I was.

They see me as some kind of martial arts monk now or some shit (I train for MMA but will never compete).
>>
>>26003993
>automatic
I think you're going to pick up guys
>>
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>>26003993
Seeing as I am sort of a Chad in behavior I would think they were serious. Still a virgin though so I'd go for it.
>>
uh, where are they going to sit? there is barely a back seat there in the first place.
>>
>>26012805
Martial arts monk sounds pretty badass to be sincere familia
>>
>>26004012
Manual isn't really "taught" to people these days, as far as I can tell.

How difficult would you say it is to learn? I've always thought driving manual would be badass.
>>
>>26013917
not that difficult. i love changing gears late and feeling the turbo kick in
>>
>>26013917
revs get high
put foot on clutch
move gear up
take foot of clutch

alternatively

revs get low
put foot on clutch
move gear down
take foot off clutch
>>
>>26003993
hell yeah
would be the first time someone would do this
>>
>>26005327
Name? Source? More?
>>
>>26014374
>>26014345
One thing that makes me tentative is how distracting that process may be. At least with an automatic the only thing you need to focus on is driving defensively.

At the same time, constantly changing gears also sounds like it will keep you alert, whereas driving automatic makes you grow to comfortable and lax, opening you up to more dangerous situations.
>>
>>26004059
>I look like Marilyn Manson.
Bullshit. Need proof
>>
>>26004235
my sides

thank you so much
>>
>>26005558
>Tfw I couldn't complete the transformation
>stuck in the cyborg hell
>have gf and friends but want to murder people with fucking baseball bats
Why couldn't you turn me all the way Chad! I'm a fucking abomination.
>>
>>26005242

I have to compete against this bullshit. And I'm not going to turn into a gym monkey like these rugby jock faggots. They all march around in flip flops and pink shorts with wife-beaters. It's like a god dam Chad clone army every festival I go. The EDM tent is like a primal Alpha male nominating ritual tent that dominate males hit the shit out of each others and any others in arms reach for the sake of being total dicks. They will even come to your table at bars and start chatting up the girl you are our with in front of you.
>>
>>26015274
It's not even a competition, dude. You literally do not exist to girls unless you have the status or money to compete with the raw genetic blessings those guys have.
>>
I would piss on his face
>>
>>26003993
I dont know why but I read that as
>Anon, we gonna beat up the chinks bro. Get in!
>>
>>26015274
>chad alpha pit at festivals

Iktfb. Some festivals are worse than others, if you go to more obscure artists like trance the crowd seems to be a bit better.

I was at a large "mixed music" festival, at the EDM stage a group of 5 roid heads literally started a mosh pit in the middle of the dance floor pushing each other around like it was a fucking metal concert. They pushed each other for about 5 minutes before they realized everyone was just avoiding them and looking at them like they were retards. Vibe killers to the max.
>>
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>>26005558
>>26004100
>>26004301
>>26004332
>>26004345
>All these beta bitches sucking Chad's dick
Your bring dishonor to your family, your ancestors and your neighbors
End yourselves
>>
>>26014643
Once you get familiar with the vehicle it all becomes muscle memory. I don't even think about it when I'm driving my manual.
>>
>>26004100
Guaranteed fun, sure, till you realize that no girl will even look at you with chad around.
>>
>>26014652
well I'm a pale mopey faggot with long dark hair
>>
>>26014643
I actual drive more carefully when I drive manual. Because, like you said, the constant gear changing keeps me alert. And I have the feeling I have more control of my car when driving manually. Sometimes when I'm in my parents' automatic it feels like the car has got a mind of his own with all the random gear changing.
>>
As long as I can sit on McAwesomes lap
>>
>>26005179
let me guess you have autism?
>>
Hop in, get to party, get drunk and just enjoy the rest of the night as always? You dont even need a girl to enjoy a party.
>>
>>26004512
You can still go on that path anon, you have them as connection for an easier chance to be part of the normie world company, and improve those social skills over the course of months 6-12 months while you also lift
Thread replies: 185
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