Christ my parents are so annoying how do I make them fuck off

>>25988637
Sounds like your dad is cucking your sleep.

>>25988637
how about you get a job and move out of their house you fucking ungrateful leech

>>25988637
>beep beep beep

made me kek and i cant quite put my finger on why

>>25988637
get a fucking job and stop mooching off your parents, retart.

You sound like my downstairs neighbor that called the police on me so many times for "walking too loud" and then never bothered me again when I threatened to sue him for harassment and he thought I was rich and could fuck him in court XD

>>25988637
Wake up earlier you fat slovenly pig, maybe you can have some of them eggs.

Ok so here's the plan:

>at 6am wake up with pots and pans and start smashing them together
>wake your parents up
>wtf
>"wakey wakey eggs and bakey" screamed repeatedly
>go back to bed

>>25988681
How? Rent is 1k a month in cities

>>25988707
That sounds awesome except I hate eggs and breakfast food

i know how instrusive parents are like but fuck man

i should have gotten those good earbuds earlier but in your case i don't think its gonna help
source: i have 2 kindergardens just below my window (would probably devalue our house for like 300k but my parents rather not mention it

>>25988713
well if you work at a not dead end, wageslave job, you can afford that. you could also save quite a bit while living at home and working. i saved over 7 grand in 6 months when i was living with my parents.

>>25988736
Yeah they made sure earplugs won't work

As soon as I shove my earplugs in they start making all that nasty food

File: 9ee.jpg (12KB, 184x184px) Image search: [Google]

12KB, 184x184px

>>25988707
my fucking sides are in oblivion

>>25988637
How's it being 13, Anon?

>>25988752
Well I don't have college so I can't have that

>>25988674
>>25988681
These are the only two acceptable answers

>>25988764
eggs are a delicacy in households i dont know what you're babbling on about you insufferable oike

>>25988637
how about you get a job and get laid

give them eggs with ricin

>>25988637

>>25988681
This
Try supporting yourself and see what time you have to get your lazy butt out of bed.

>>25988847
Is that untraceable? Will they die? I'm curious

>>25988914
How apartments are 1000 a month

>>25988917
yes and yes, read about it

OP here mfw they have work tomorrow

Tick tock wagecuck. You can ruin my life on the weekend but during the weekday you can't torture me. Bet it's driving you nuts all day at your job.

>>25988952
I want to do this but I'm scared of prison

>>25988681
You must be new here, wagecuck. Reddit is that way

>>25988637
ear plugs and ear protectors, I wear them all the time, even in public, Stacy's brown baby starts screaming insanely in the supermarket, no problem, Chad mutters an insult, didn't hear him, can't hear Tyrone and Jamal's mixtape blasting, can't hear the neighbors screaming at each other, nothing distracts my autistic mind, I can think clearly, I am less stressed, IRL seems a little more like a video game or something

you do have control over the last remaining conduit between your mind and the normies

>>25989058
I know but that nasty burnt egg smell lingers in my room for like 2 or 3 hours and it smells so strong

Leave it to my parents to ruin the last conduit I have to escape from their tyranny

>>25989146
why your parents burning eggs like that?
how many fucking eggs do they even eat? you only eat 1-2 eggs as a side dish and even scrambled eggs don't take too much preparation

maybe in 5 years they will die anyway out of heart attack, eggs have tons of cholesterol in them,doctors even recommend not eating more than 1 a day

Move out ya fucking retard.

>>25989246
Ok I'll just sleep on the l train and hope it doesn't go through south Jamaica

Don't listen to the "le moveout le job XD" normies. For the noise, get earplugs. For the smell, you could try stuffing something under your door, burning incense, or one of those bathroom sprays.

>>25989407
Incense is a good idea do they have newer incense that are more mild and less smoky? I love the idea but it'd be nice to have a mild smell and not choke on it

>>25988637
The answer to all these problems is "Move out".

>>25989606
Apartments are 1k a month what do I do

Help me...

>>25988637
Hahah I've read this before.

>>25988637
That sounds eggzausting

>>25989715
Get low wage job, find roommates, work on your career so you can find employment that will allow you to get your own place at some point. I mean you whine about your parents getting on your nerves but imagine how they feel having an able-bodied man that won't leave their house and make his own life when their own are coming to an end.

It's been 2 hours and my mom is still slamming shit under me constantly

There was 20 minutes worth of chores in the kitchen. It's been 2 hours.