>"OK everyone pair up" >odd number of students in the class >tfw always have to either partner up with the teacher or the teacher forces a pair of students who clearly want nothing to do with me to accept me into their group
>>25952352 I TREMBLED WHEN JOB "ORIENTATION" REQUIRED US TO INTRODUCE AND TALK ABOUT OURSELVES IN ROTATION WHEN IT GOT TO MY TURN I JUST SAID "THIS JOB ISN'T FOR ME" AS AN EXCUSE NOT TO TALK AND WALKED OUT
>tfw first day of drawing class they made us partner up with 4 different people and draw a portrait of them while getting to know them
so much spilt spaghetti
>qt girl asks "do you like art?" >no, I'm not really a big art guy (thinking she means like paintings or illustrators) >what do you mean you don't like art? you don't watch movies or listen to music? >o-oh! yeah I listen to movies -watch movies haha I saw star wars fugg now she thinks I'm a weirdo
>Teacher says introduce yourself and what you want to be in senior year >Anon says I want to be a porn star >Normies look at anon funny >Anon leaves and goes to park >Anon drinks and reflects >Anon fucks off to teach English in mexico
I actually sperged out when this happened to me in my first year of university.
I actually said
"My name is X and I've been working for the last few years and decided to start university now to help increase my chances of getting a better job in the future"
Then the teacher asked me
>"What's the biggest thing that's happened to you in the last few years"
And I said
"Oh, um. Well I got married and went on a 6 month trip around Europe for our honeymoon" >note: I'm a HHKV that's never come close to having a GF let a lone being married, I've also never been overseas nor have I ever worked.
>tfw never had the courage to just say no Next time I'll just say I don't want to disclose that info for privacy reasons Anyone who thinks I'm a sperg is an idiot because nobody actually wants to do that shit
>>25952369 >mfw I would never partner up and just hope I could get by unnoticed Worked sometimes
>have mentally rehearsed and brainstormed things to say, some half-lies, some pinches of truth carefully vetted and selected to be sufficient as a talking point for a minute or so but not interesting enough to be remembered for long >done it for a while now, most people can't tell that I'm not anything but a normal functioning member of society
I've gone through some horrible fucking shit in fucking introductions.
>First day of highschool >Sit down by qt3.14 >Tip my fedora to her as a sign of friendship as I place my katana beside my desk >Crack open a can of Mountain Dew, accidentally spilling some on my Evangelion tshirt that I've been wearing for the past week >Teacher tells us to raise our hands and tell us one interesting fact about ourselves. >Raise hand, still covered in dried bbq sauce from the tendies that my mummy made me last night. >Teacher points to me and tells me to tell the class an interesting fact about myself >I concentrate for a second as the stubble on my neck begins to tingle >"I am expert on Linux software, as well as anime and PC gaming" >qt3.14 grill beside me giggles, she's totally into me.
>>25952785 THIS. LIE, YOU IDIOTS. LIE LIE LIE LIE LIE. YOU KNOW. LYING. THAT THING YOU SPEND SO MUCH TIME DOING ON THE INTERNET. I GUARANTEE YOU THAT YOUR "NORMIE" PEERS ARE LYING THROUGH THEIR TEETH DURING THESE ICEBREAKERS. YOU HATE THEM. SO LIE TO THEM. DON'T LET THEM UPSTAGE YOU WHEN IT COMES TO THE ONLY THING YOU'RE GOOD AT.
>>25953134 ANYTHING ALONG THE LINES OF WHAT >>25952443 SAID. >i like to run long distance and drink coffee AN ATHLETIC PURSUIT THAT HE WILL NOT BE TESTED ON HIS KNOWLEDGE OF. (I USUALLY SAY SWIMMING.) AND A POPULAR BEVERAGE HE ENJOYS, CHARMINGLY AND FACETIOUSLY MISREPRESENTED AS A HOBBY. IT'S A BORING, INSIPID RESPONSE BEFITTING A BORING, INSIPID ACTIVITY. AND NO ONE WILL REMEMBER OR GIVE A SHIT THE NEXT DAY.
>>25953721 THAT'S WHY YOU PICK AN OBSCURE HOBBY. PREFERABLY ONE THAT DOESN'T REQUIRE A LOT OF TECHNICAL EXPERTISE OR SPECIFIC EQUIPMENT. BESIDES, WHAT DO YOU THINK THE ODDS OF SOMEONE CALLING YOU OUT ARE? LET'S BE GENEROUS AND SAY 20%. IF YOU LIE, YOU HAVE A 20% OF SPILLING YOUR SPAGHETTI. IF YOU TELL THE TRUTH, THE ODDS OF YOU NOT LOOKING LIKE A WEIRDO BECOME STATISTICALLY INSIGNIFICANT. YOU'VE BEEN DEALT A SHITTY HAND IN LIFE. DON'T EMBARRASS YOURSELF BY PLAYING WITH THE CARDS FACE-UP.
>>25954327 Autism is a meme. I was meming on you because you said some dumb shit that would make you sound like an edgelord if you ever said it in person, which you wouldn't because you'd be too busy spilling your spaghetti. get memed on nerd
>>25952352 >Okay class we are going to do people bingo >Go around the room and fill out all the names of people who have the skills listed on the sheet >Get up walk out of class >Go to bathroom vomit >Return with a smile....
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