Welcome, take a seat, order a drink and share your woes.
Sub barkeep keeping the fort until the regular ones show up.
Barkeep, send over a single Glenmorangie
I'm In a cycle i have tried to escape from, but never managed
I feel miserable, so i don't do things to improve my situation
I then feel miserable because i could have improved my life and i'm still in the dumps, as time and opportunities pass me by
She moved back to her country last year, we had lingering phone contact for a while afterward but that stopped. Recently though we found each other on facebook and have been really happy talking again. At the end of this year we might be in the same city again. Guess I'll see what happens.
Barkeep, I'll take a Mountain Dew: Voltage mixed with a double shot of Skyy Vodka, mixed inside a pint glass.
I had three tickets to Six Flags, nobody would go with me. Next day, a date cancelled without telling me.
Here you lad. I think I know that feeling. You are both discouraged because once you greentext it down it sounds suprisingly pathetic and you don't expect any realistic help as an outcome, and secondly you really think you should know better than to get cought up in it. Yet it somehow doesn't seem to work. Chin up, we are all going to make it.
That's still a whole year to go through dude. Be carefully optimistic but don't hang on it. Do your own thing.
>vodka in a pint
Sure, you asked for it. Flaky friends are the worst, I can't help you but I do understand. I told a very close friend to fuck off a week ago because of just how unreliable he is.
Here you go anon. What's wrong?
>doing thing with girl because I like her
>"aww anon you're so sweet girls will love you"
WHAT THE FUCK DOES THAT EVEN MEAN
YOU'RE A GIRL
WHY DON'T YOU LIKE ME
WHAT IS THIS
Work underpaid me by 500 bong dollars today due to an 'admin error'. They say they can't rectify this until february. I've spoken to a public advice service, and they state this is illegal, but that I can't really expect any additional compensation as they have promised to repay the owed money.
Just pisses me off that they don't give a shit. I am already phoned in sick for tomorrow, so I'm going to spend the whole day job searching, hopefully resigning very soon.
Barkeep? Cuba Libre, thanks.
I'm having lady problems man. Gril I really care about wants to get into a serious relationship with me but is hesitant because of my extreme depression and drinking problem. She's even said she loves me but is doesn't want to see me destroy myself.
Eh, you can always save up. Barkeep is a slav, he can't own a gun. I'm also poor but that is just unfortunate. What gun do you have your eyes on? I'd love to get my hands on a USP and a vz58.
Sure thing. Also you shouldn't feel bad about ordering a drink just for yourself alone, that's what barstands are for. Order some coffee first to ease it in if you are that nervous.
Just make me a nice cocktail, I haven't had anything nice in a while. All I drink now is bottom shelf vodka and the occasional beer just to satisfy my alcoholism. I want to die but I'm still too much of a vagina to follow through with suicide so I choose to literally drink myself to death.
>I keep trying to find someone romantically whose willing and happy to fufill this illness I have
>Everyone who says they are a certain way that would fufill this trait ends up flaking out and not being what they said they were.
>It always ends the same god damn way
>My illness shows, want me to do mean and awful things that would hurt the other person for them to notice me
>Try telling them this and I need to talk to them
>They never do anything else and will end up not talking to me for one reason or another
>They always say the same fucking thing
>"Oh you are really nice and we clicked so well! It's just that i'm so busy/sad that I don't want to talk! :( You will find that right girl, and you will make her very happy."
Clearly every girl I find I don't make happy. Stop fucking saying these god damn empty words to me because clearly they have no meaning, being nice, kind, loving, and courteous gets to fucking no where with women and every time I've tried to win a woman's heart this bullshit happens one way or another. Everyone expects ME to treat women this way, but the women who want this kind of treatment are fucking princesses who want to be tended to hand and foot and be able to rule my life when they don't work for a living so I have to provide for two on one salary.
I'm just going to kill myself, it looks like I'll never find love and I might as well rot in the ground free from feelings and sadness.
Sure, barkeep is actually fairly skilled when it comes to women. I say give her a chance, there is a decent posibility that you hit it off well and that she makes you feel all giddy and happy. Women can cure depression that way.
On the other hand be careful - you cannot force seriousness into a relationship. You cant just agree on "okay, from now this is serious". Every relationship starts as a fling, then it works its way up if there is potential. Feelings need to developed, they can't just be there overnight. Take your time and give her a chance, we drink because we are lonely usually.
Christ, yeah I would be mad too. Nothing you can do, look for the better job and suck it up since you can't really do much. No point in going down the legal way for 500$.
Coming right up.
I have the money now but it would hurt and I'm saving my small handful for school shit later in the year. I hope to find a small job soon for the meantime.
No specific gun. I'd like an obligatory nugget someday but a functional pistol for carrying and a decent rifle for home would be swell.
I know that feeling. Not only have I never had a relationship, I have never had a lasting friendship either. There's just something about me that turns people away and as a result I now have major trust issues on top of social anxiety.
God damn that looks so good.
Give me a Vodkalemon, barkeep
I have three exams incoming next week at uni, but I don't even feel the urge to study... I blame myself every night until 4 am without sleep, and I'm starting to feel my health dropping. Smoke doesn't even help me release the stress anymore.
Is all over?
1/2 oz gin
1/2 oz vodka
1 oz Blue Curacao liqueur
1/2 oz pineapple juice
1 dash bitterlemon soda (you can also use sprite alternatively but bitterlemon is better)
Pour all first three ingredients (gin, vodka, and blue curacao liqueur) in a shaker filled with ice. Shake briskly and then pour the liquid in a highball glass. Then add 1/2 oz of unsweetend pineapple juice in the concoction. Let the the unsweetened pineapple juice settle in the bottom of the glass and afterwards pour in a dash of Schweppes to add a touch of fizz.
Barkeep flunked his schoolshit due to procrastination issues. If there is one thing, one out of any number of things on this world, that I can't help others with, it's procrastination. I'm sorry anon. It's a tricky cunt for sure.
No you don't know this feeling then, you just know being rejected.
There is a lot more in play here than just "whaaa people don't want me." a fuckton more than you could ever hope to understand.
Grill I like knows about my drinking problem and gas been helping me with it. I still have a massive provlem with my depression and drinking, but it feels nice to have someone who at least pretends to care
girl wants me to move to her country and get married
actually want to go to college to get my dream job that i've wanted since i was a child
no matter what choice i make, somebody is unhappy
tried to kill myself already
I think it's time to crack open the old Elijah Craig neat, bartender.
I work at a small company with a slave driver boss.
Us 5 employees, we all agreed to help each other get new jobs. I was doing my best to help and keep everyone happy so they aren't miserable here. I worked overtime to cover for them. We'd cover eachothers mistakes.
Our first employee got hired at a big rival company. Big pay, big benefits. The kind of job you can support a family on. Then the second employee. Same place. So on. All the others work their now.
Now it's just me, training two new people, my work load unmanageable but I have to pay the rent somehow. I work 55+ hours a week.
My old coworkers say they're helping but, I'm the only one left now. I want to say it's them, but it may just be me. Who knows.
You'll move on too eventually. Get through this slog and there's light the other side, start fighting your own battles. Join a trade union demand more pay, be that pesky employee seeing as they pushed you too it.
Garcon! Could you bring me a bottle of red wine?
Slept with a girl about a month ago, really liked her too. She told me a week ago that I was too good for her, I know that's a bullshit reason. In this misery I keep going around thinking about other girls I've dated, which sucks. This is why I hate getting attached to people, it's just not worth it. Fuck everybody and everything. Except that bottle of red.
These hoes ain't loyal lad. There will be others, just take it easy.
I want a pint of pure ethanol, dusted with no less than 30 crushed barbiturates of your choice.
I'm 20. I'm tall, good-looking, fit, etc. All for nothing though. I'm a complete social retard thanks to my helicopter mother who would never let me go anywhere with other kids. As a result, friends started to drop me and by 14 I had 1 friend. He was another shut-in. But he actually had a sociable personality, just unfavourable circumstances.
In 2011 he moved house and started getting friends. Didn't bother me at first because we still hung out and nothing really changed. After about 6 months I realized something that really scared me: I needed him more than he needed me. I asked if I could meet these new people. He said I could but he didn't think I'd like them much.
Eventually met them in December 2012, after dropping out of college after 1 month (finished secondary school at 16, college overwhelmed me completely) and spending 4 months in total isolation. Got on really well with them and was actually popular.
Summer 2013 was probably the only time in my life I was truly happy. I was 17. Popular. More sociable than I knew I could be. Even fairly popular with girls, though I never did anything about that. We started drinking and doing drugs. This eventually caused a split in our core group and by September the wild ride was over.
Did nothing in 2014. Tried to repeat the college entry exams since I was still only 19 and could afford another year. That fell through in January 2015.
Now I'm in a computer programming course. Doing well. Have a part time job. Get on well with most people in the course. I'm still nowhere near happy though. Most of the time I'm alone all I think about is that summer. I'm glad I took the last chance I had to be a teen, like in the movies. But a taste of that life isn't enough. I'm just going through the motions now with barely enough money to do that.
im returning back home after the holidays soon, and i've drifted away from girl i'd been talking to every day before the christmas break, and really hoping that the relationship isn't dead and we can get close again.
could i get a pint of tuborg?
Here you go, man. Tell us about the girl.
Barkeep, I'll take Absinthe, neat.
I start end of term exams next week.
I was fucking around entire year.
I am not even sure if I want to pass it.
Nothing is important to me anymore.
I am 24 and don't know what to do with my life.
I fear it's inevitable that I'm going to hurt someone someday (as in kill).
I don't want to be psycho and snap, but don't want to turn mysefl in for treating neither.
..what would my family think of me.
My university days consisted of drinking 3-5 days a week and some studying. Thing was, I never drank more than I could, I always made my grades. It was a lot of dicking around though and I carry with me a lot of stories. Keeps me warm during rainy days.
What I always felt I wanted and needed to do was writing, I wrote everything all the time. Find your thing to keep you sane and try to come to terms with the fact that life is ass.
This one is fresh anons. In fact, it s kind of happening as I write.
>Be me, right now
>Uni, first year
>I had a crush back in the high
>I have not seen her for a year now, she moved to america after graduating from the high
>literally lives 4k kilometers away
>I cant ever love another woman
>The class reunion was today
>She came back for it
>I didnt go
>It s still on right now
>I cant go
Don't worry, you're just telling yourself that so that you can feel like you're special in some way. It happens to everybody, but usually it's associated with suicidal thoughts. People who say they'll kill themselves when their parents are gone are lying to themselves, they'll never do it. Just like how you'll never hurt anyone.
>tfw your thread gets no replies
>3 years ago
>girl in class asks me who my "celebrity crush" is
>omg that's so cool when you're older I just know you're gonna get a skinny rock girl with cool hair
How long is "when you're older?" cause I'm still waiting on my gf
I don't usually approve of medication, but she's going through some serious BPD. She needs to get it checked.
A mental hospital won't do any good if her mind is an emotional rollercoster with no stop. I've dealt with this twice.
I think I'll share a story with you guys. Will appreciate it if you shed some of your thoughts on it. Well here it goes:-
Once upon a certain space and time there lived a man who could not grasp the concept of morality or mortality. His deepest darkest fears manifested themselves in vividly grim scenarios. Thus, through intense focus he forced himself to stop perceiving any element of existence from a verbatim literally serious viewpoint. Consequently the whole world transformed into a malicious and mischievous, cruel but comical... hectic yet humorous joke. Whilst laughing incessantly at this gargantuan gag by himself along with others he considered whether or not these diverse creatures were actually aware of this amusing facade. Fortunately however the part of his being that was previously tormented due to such infectious beliefs had been destroyed utterly.
I'll have a Long Island Iced Tea.
I'm depressed but I don't really feel like I have the right to be. I have people who care about me. I'm good looking. I have a great career with a six digit salary plus huge bonuses that lets me travel around the world. I've got investments that pay off big dividends. I live in a big apartment in the middle of London. I drive a nice car.
To look at me you'd think I was the happiest man in the world. But every night when I come home or go back to my hotel room I spiral into this horrible emptiness.
There are people who'd kill for my life, and I don't even want it sometimes. The rest of the time is just putting on a show and going through the motions.
I already fixed a G&T for myself, thanks. I'd rather have a rum martinez, but only gin and tonic at home so...
I really feel like shit nowdays you know. I need to stay strong but I can feel my strength running out. I don't even know where to start. I guess I'll finish my drink and it'll be easier from there.
>advances I can repeatedly reject
The best part of the bait isn't that you try to seem cruel, it's this. You'd reject them one time and never be able to reject him again because he'd stop trying.
Fuck, I feel you. Everything looks fantastic on the outside but when you get home you just fall into the couch and can't get up until it's bedtime. Depression isn't rational, it's just fuck all.
I had a whiskey in mind, but whisky will do as well. I suppose we should progress. It doesnt matter who I am or what my story is. I sit here tonight for a reason I tell ya.
I remember a day just like this one that really struck me. It was in winter, we had just burried a good man.sat next to the bar drowning in all the liquor money could buy and all the sadness live could muster. And then, an old senile man, who could never even remember my name in spit of my telling him every time I visited that pub, told me just this.
"I dont know what your story was anymore, anon. All I know, it was sad as heck."
In the end, we can just vaguely try to get across the feels somehow. Words fail to describe, always at least a little bit. They were not made to connect people true. No, words were made as a practical tool. That s why there are poets: because a normal person cant actually express jackshit once they try to got a bit further than just skin deep.
But I digress. You know, I think that the most striking line in poetry, however shocking this my opinion might be to some, is one of the concluding sentences of the Love Song of J. Alfred Prufrock:
I have heard the mermaids sing, each to each
I do not think that they will sing to me.
The point is, there isnt really much hope in trying to get things out properly. You simply cant. To connect is only within the realm of your possibility as long as you dont need to. All those things that make you desperate to connect; all the butt-ends of days and ways that lead nowhere, they all make it impossible to engage and endulge in naivette that is the happy, fulfiling stereotype of proper relationship life.
For the rest of us, alas!
Our dried voices, when
We whisper together
Are quiet and meaningless
Mind if I pull up a chair? I've got the very same feel, but instead of hoping she texts me back I'm kind of hoping she never texts me back so I can finally be free.
Just a black coffee for me.
That's better I guess. I feel like I'm going crazy. I have thoughts that I seem so rational but something deep down in me tells me that this isn't a good way and I shouldn't be walking on it.
I feel like nature is the biggest enemy of the human race. I'm not talking about trees and animals. I'm talking about this huge random generator that is nature. Or our genes. Or our animalistic tendencies. The way we want to reprodouce no matter what. How some people are born with illness that they suffer from throughout their lives. How competition is written in our genes. We have to separate ourselves from nature. Control our evolution. We have to stick together as humans and not play by the "survival of the fittest" bullshit that makes us fight and kill ourselves. Petty fights for members of the opposite sex. There are people out there who would stab their friends in the back for 5 minutes of sex. I must sound like an idiot. I wish I could elaborate more.
Why am I even rambling about this shit?
Here you go, we grind our own beans.
I have a girl like that, at least atm. She liked me for adventure and masculinity but I've lost the latter part recently. I know she would look at me in disappointment if she saw me today. Still the best lay I've had. And I miss her.
One of the girls I just can't get out of my mind during moments of despair. Makes me feel weak.
How are you feeling right now?
I can't even tell people because I know their first reaction will be 'well you're stinking rich, what are you depressed about?'
My only outlet is a diary I've been keeping since I was 14.
is it okay if I throw something else on the jukebox?
Will this do? Pray tell about your problems.
I guess it'll do, thanks. My problems are quite uninteresting. I had a fight with someone over something really stupid. He's currently not talking to me, acting like a little bitch.
I made a Trans friend of mine (actual trans not tumblr bullshit trans) sperg out because I mentioned the two times of recent I went round hers I had to sleep on a laminate wood floor in the cold and Clean up dog sick because she's too incapable
Autistic as fuck but refuses to go to the doctors and get diagnosisto do it and just sperged out looking at it for five minutes
Kinda concerned I just lost a friend
even if they are a massive autistso hit me up with your strongest, barkeep
kissless virgin with 20. i can actually talk with strangers and should score about 6/10 or more i think but i just never met a girl that was interessted. someone similar storys except "it was like this then it got better at random" ?
Hey there Barkeep, how is it going, I'll have a beer.
So there's this girl. I don't even know what say. It's been sometime we are friends, not really friends I guess we just hangout together, and in the beginning I felt nothing for her, but now it started to change and I know she does not feel the same. I have started to distance myself (she gave no indication she noticed it), but some friend says I should stick to her to try and win her over, but it pains to me every time I start a conversation to see those telltales that she's not interested at all. What should I do, follow my friend's advice and endure the pain in the hopes or just give up and go for the next one? It also doesn't help she seems to like my asshole roommate, who doesn't give a fuck about her and has a girlfriend.
Anyway, thanks for listening.
Maybe if I retell my story again, it will help me get over her.
Met a robot girl on OKCupid, she was super qt, we got along really well, she was the sad emotionally unstable type, and I thought I could make her life a little less miserable, and it really seemed like we cared about each other for a short while, until later I found out she has a history of leading guys on without actually feeling anything for them, and that in all likelihood she doesn't give a shit about me at all despite me really wanting to help her and support her. I texted her, but she hasn't responded in hours, and I'm almost hoping she doesn't, so I can be free.
Tomorrow is the last day to turn in any late projects for uni. I have 3 of them that I haven't even started, and I have no motivation.
>also no gf
Bring me a bottle of wine and two glasses, just in case.
Hey Barkeep,do me a favor and give me a recommendation.Drinking isnt my thing but i really feel down these couple of days.Dont worry i am 18, hit it last may, altough i dont really remember much about 2015.I have been spending the last year and a couple of months more to get into uni, but i failed to get into any of my recommendations.I pushed away all of my friends(the very little of them) my hobbies and almost my health to my studies and i couldnt even pass by the other people who entered the exams (it was for art).Everyday my life was get up, take the bus to the galery,work a bunch, go to home,sleep and repeat.For 15 months.And im gonna have to live through this hell for another year.Now im working from home.I am so ashamed of myself that going outside hurts my heart.It isnt any better now.Since i am at home any second i dont work i feel like shit but when i start working i remember how awfully i got rekt.Worst part is, i know i have to go to some other galery to study at some point.I have the feeling that i cannot get into uni with working by myself, but i spend every waking moment working.Every second is anxiety and work and i sometimes feel everything is pointless.Add into the fact that i live with my mom(dont have a dad) who i sometimes think, thinks what i am doing is a waste of time and i blew the education i had taken for 12 years just for some wild fantasy.
You guys closed yet? Need a drink, maybe just Tomatini on the rocks, nothing special.
I've completely isolated myself, but I have this weird Stockholm syndrome with loneliness where it's the only state where I feel at home. It's like an abusive significant other or something.
i'll have a whiskey mate, thanks
feel like everytime i try everything just gets worse. kinda done at this point.
Gosh I usually lurk, but not tonight I guess. Slap me some argonian ale, barkeep.
There's this girl whose been having a rough time recently. She's liked me for a while and I've liked her too. We've gone on a few dates here and there, held hands, said nice things to eachother. I've basically just been trying to make things a little more comfortable for her.
Problem is, everything I say ends up coming out of my mouth sounding like the most hurtful thing in the world. It seems like every time I try to lighten the conversation, there's a failure in communication and she ends up getting offended and depressed. I've recently started to drift from this girl, but have gotten back on track with her because I feel obligated to help. I really like her but don't know what kind of things I can say to her to ease her suffering.
Anybody got any experience with this junk?
Fix me up a trashcan in a mason jar please. Got issues letting go of this gal who was my best friend and girlfriend for 6 years then just kinda broke it all off with me over text message. Can't even sleep I think of her so much.
So guys help me about this...
I met a girl on the last year of HS(lets call her M)
M is honestly 9/10 if not 10/10 and a lot of other guys are hitting on her but she just shrughs them off, but we have a crazy bond as if that saying that opposites attract each other is right. As you can conclude i rally like her but am not the prettiest sight 7/10 at best, i am an atheist and she is a muslim (cool with me bc she doesnt like christians or orthodox guys and there are a lot of them) and she doesn't mind it, i'm smart (now attending natural-mathematical faculty) and well she isn't so bright but still she is very smart (she studies medicine wants to be a senior nurse). So we talk a lot and have fun many friends are shipping us and teasing us about it, we are flirting constantly and i think that it would be time for me to express my feels for her...but thats the issue i have simply never felt this stuff towards another person (every thing that i had in hs were just some short term relationships or one night stands)....pic related our fb convo...the translation reads: oh come on honey let me tell you something. I love hanging out with you and all that but you really get on my nerves when saying "oh come on how can you not know that" and similiar..and don't swear so much...i can stand you and i love you i swear to god (allah part kek). And thank you for these nice words handsome...
What do you guys think should i try something
If you want to help her, don't help her.
She wants a friend, not a therapist.
Even if you want to be more than friends, trying to help her or fix her will only make her drift further away from you.
Good advice, thanks. Should I ask her about it? Bring up the topic of her not eating or shutting herself away? Or should I try to whisk her away on magnificent adventure? I don't know much about girls or other people but I think she deserves it.
It's hard to say, i don't know how close the two of you are.
I went through something similar with just a friend, back then i just texted her she seemed out of her usual happy self. she told me she was fine. i replied by saying that if she didnt want to talk about it, i wouldnt push, but if there ever was something up, i'd be there to listen, because i considered her my friend.
>everything I say ends up coming out of my mouth sounding like the most hurtful thing in the world.
I had this problem where i didnt always know what to say or how to say it. frankly, i just told her exactly that.
>Hey, i dont really know what to say right now, but im here for you, okay?
hope that helps.
we ended up in this awkward place between friends and lovers for a month, until she found a marine with PTSD who she still is with right now.
That's borderline exactly how our relationship is right now. In between friends and big shit. I've been told that feeling guilted to stay with a girl is the worst thing in the world, but honestly it doesn't feel that bad right now. Is this just the calm before the storm?
What's your story Anon?
>I've been told that feeling guilted to stay with a girl is the worst thing in the world, but honestly it doesn't feel that bad right now. Is this just the calm before the storm?
It is. Get out while you can. It feels good to try and help someone you care about, to be there for that person. It gives you some sort of goals, meaning, purpose, right?
But then you forget the human aspect. You can't buy love.
Everything you do for this person does not guarantee she will fall in with you. So in the end, when she finds someone else to spend her life with...you're left behind, empty and alone, "just a friend". Because the heart you had, you poured into her, hoping one day she'd return the favor.
But that day never comes.
I honestly will just have a doctor pepper.
I just had my first anxiety attack, and it was one of the worst experiences of my life. I don't know how to deal with it, I'm scared it will happen again. Help...
hey barkeep, just a scotch and water for me.
I recently started talking to this girl I had a thing with a couple of years ago. I was new and inexperienced at the time and she really showed me the ropes. Unfortunately it was a weird quasi open relationship that ended with her going to america to fugg some guy she met on Tumblr (Kek)
Now that she's back and theres a possibility of a renewed friendship at least I dunno if I should fuck her, friend-zone her or delete her from facebook.
I had this shit for years back in the day. What were you doing when the attack started?
nightly walk, there was some sort of gathering going on in my spot i walk to and was being stared at, then i ran away like a sperg and started flashing back to some old friends i lost years ago, cried in the middle of a field, then just sort of..broke down. heartbeat went crazy and i could only say 'nononononono' and knew what it was from there.
The worst thing you can do is be afraid of it happening again. That is the one piece of advice I wish I knew when I was younger. You have to be accepting of this shit whenever it comes on. The sooner you accept it, the sooner it goes away. Maybe your brain is telling you it is time to accept the fact that you've lost these friends, and it's for the best that we all move on.
You're in my heart, brother.
Hey man, its water guy. Another tap please. Could you give me some advice
>Gee I wish I had a boyfriend like you anon. Lol forever alone
Ask her out
> why can't I have any guy friends without them wanting to be in a relationship! Its so hard to be a woman nowadays
She's mad at me. Is suddenly a victim.
I want to scream at her, what should I do?
>What's your story Anon?
its a long and boring story, really.
>be at friends birthday party
>for some reason fatass friend studying software engineering got a gf
>gf brings borderline friend
>shes crazy, like redflagbingo crazy, but i dont have any issues with her personally, so i cant distance myself from her, considered her my friend.
>at some point i drink too much because i havent had a lot of experience with alcohol
>fall onto her
>spill spaghetti and say some weird shit
>next morning she texts me to ask what that was about
>try to play it cool but fail because im autistic
>"i tried to kiss you haha, sorry i dont know what came over me, just forget it"
>she tells me she didnt know i had feelings for her
>i dont, but what the fuck, lets see where this goes. everyone hates her anyway.
>she acts interested
>wait this isnt supposed to happen
>she is not into a relationship right now but is ok with being more than "just friends"
>make FWB mistake #1: fall in love
>the more we hangout over the course of a few months, the more i start caring.
>over the course of time we hangout together, get into shit together, talk about shit bothering us.
>she vents her heart and history to me, she's an open book at this point
>i try to be there for her, i work out for her, i try to make her smile, she gives my life purpose
>basically the whole doitforher.jpg
>at some point she stays for the night
>for once felt peace inside
this is where karma starts being a bitch again
>fast forward few weeks
>she stops responding to my texts, which is weird because she is the one who is always so happy to text me
>ive read enough greentexts to know where this is going
>meet again later at birthday party of fatass' gf
>she has a new boyfriend
>he's an asshole to everyone
>some shit happens
>she acts like im back to "just friends", just like that, nothings up, we were just fwbs after all
>i cant deal
>break off contact with her
>losing her, i lose every reason that had me trying
Sorry for the shitty story and the shitty ending. cut it off because of the character limit. all i wanted to say is, try not too get into that rollercoaster. it's not worth it. if it were you wouldn't be here anyway.
Seriously considering leaving college and going NEET. I just don't think I'll ever make it. Everyone around me is better than me in every way I can think of, and I'll never be able to catch up. What's the fucking point anyway?
I'll have Four Roses. The bartender recommended it to me a couple of weeks ago
So when you get a view on okc, but when you go to the visitors tab they aren't there, that was just to block you right?
>Are you happy for how you felt? Or do you feel nothing but guilt?
I got what i deserved, i guess.
Sometimes i feel like i did heroin in a world where everyone thinks heroin is the shit.
Like i said, for the first time in my 20+ years of existence, i felt peace inside. i felt like i was achieving a goal, having a purpose. But soon i didn't have my heroin(e) anymore and so the withdrawal symptoms and depression turned up. All in all I have conflicted feelings about this. On one hand this is the only thing i can think about when someone asks the last time i was happy, but on the other hand i feel like i would be better off if i just never went through this. I used her for personal gains and it backfired, just like it should. What started out as a "trying not to get too attached" ended up with me having feelings for her.
>How can the happiness I feel now be bad?
It can't, until -or unless- it turns out it has all been for nothing and she has someone else in her life. Maybe it works out between you two. I really hope it does, senpai. But remember that the more you raise the stakes, the more you can lose.
I turn 20 in an hour and I'm just generally unhappy. I'm taking a semester off from college to work and gain a little real world experience. There was a girl I was talking to all fall but she started ignoring me for no reason as far as I can tell. I guess I'll always know myself as a kv teen.
I don't drink much, but anyone got any suggestions. I'm probably going to drown myself tomorrow, might as well start now.
Bartender took a break I suppose, anon knows it was deserved. I'll serve myself a double shot of southern comfort one hundred proof mixed with some red bull in a Tom Collins glass. Hope the bots are doing well and keeping there chins up. Quick reminder that with enough positive thinking and will power you can solve your problems. Be good be careful.
hey man, the keeps away for a bit, sorry. Mind if i take over for a few? Here's you beer sir.
Hey man, follow your heart, even if it tells your it's not worth it. I was in the same position as you a few months ago. I always thought of her as someone who just saw me as a friend until my friend told me we had this "something special" between us. I was stupid enough to listen to him and in the end she just saw me as a friend. I still blame myself to this day for fucking this up. I wish i could just hug her and love her but i know that feeling is not reciprocated and i wish i still buried them like i had at the start.
I have been giving up my whole life, never got a girlfriend. Rationally I know she doesnt like me, but just this once I feel the push to not give up, to put my heart on the table. My friend told me what he did because that's how he usually gets girls, sticks to them and eventually gets on with them, even if they didn't like him in the beginning. Also this girl I like has this "I love England" going on, pretends to love tea and all that. I'm nothing like that.
I'm honestly lost man.
>Rationally I know she doesnt like me, but just this once I feel the push to not give up, to put my heart on the table.
I've been there and i've already told you how it went. It's of course no guarantee how it will go for you. Your friend sounds like a casanova. Would you rather stay where you are now or take it to the end? Neither answer is wrong, mind you, but think about it. If you end up being right and your friend wrong, where does that leave you with her?
You got shit in common with her? Do you think you two had perspective if she said yes?
>Also this girl I like has this "I love England" going on, pretends to love tea and all that. I'm nothing like that.
If that's all, she doesn't sound that bad, to be honest.
>she seemed to be interested in me and I was willing to give it a shot, but she has since walked away.
Sorry to hear about that. Sounds like trouble if you went after her. Are you friends or not even that?
Hey man, you been here for me so often, i got your back bro.
Get me a coffee with whiskey and orange juice in it (fuck off, I like it and call it a Crazy Morning)
> we're go skating tomorrow
> I love her, but she loves me more
> I don't want to let her down
> why can't we just cuddle and watch anime
> why does she want to be so much more than friends
> I just want to be alone with her, without the sexual tension
Fuck I don't even know. Just kill me or something
>Sorry to hear about that. Sounds like trouble if you went after her. Are you friends or not even that?
I honestly don't know. She was the closest thing I've ever had to a girlfriend and I guess we're still friends, but the type that only talks maybe once a month.
Stuck with genetic Parkinson's. I saw my Uncle today. He reminded me of what I have.
I got an anxiety disorder to. Hard to concentrate when back and shoulders feel like someone poking them with a knife.
Also got Daddie issues. My father beat me and threw me out of the house during dark. No wonder I'm afraid of the dark.
I love my mother but she was never motherly. How can I blame her? She lived a shit street life in the Philippines. At least she tried and didn't turn into a whore.
Every girl I meet I want to tell them that I love them. But everything else is telling them to head the other way.
I found some poems today on my old computer. God, nothing has changed.
Nothing has changed at all.
Can someone read my letter I will never give to her?
I know this probably the last thing you want to see or read.
I am sorry (again) for acting like a asshole. I am sorry for treating you and everyone like shit. I am embarrassed for acting like a little shithead. I know we can't be friends again, and that tears me apart. Because everyday I think of you. Everyday I think of the mistakes I made, forcing you to deal with my bullshit. Living everyday knowing that I fucked up.I'm sorry how our friendship ended. It was just me not wanting to face reality. And I still look away from the reality today. You gave me some of the happiest moments in my life. You gave my life meaning. To me, you are the perfect drug. I'm sorry for giving you this letter and but I just want you know how I feel before going into my surgery.
Ahh man. I've got to be the shittest member of my family right now. It just dawned on me.
>I never call my mom or other relatives who call me asking to hear from me and know what I'm doing
>tfw I'm a NEET so I'm never doing anything
>Dad wants me to prepare for military life, spends money on shit I need
>Barely use it
>Sister's in college
>Cousin I'm staying with is a total Chad
>I have the answers to all my problems, but I don't use them
>I'm my own worse enemy
It seems not a day goes by that I don't have some sort of existential crisis. My only consolation is that I'm gonna die one day, but I don't want to keep living with this guilt.
It just kind of seems that anybody I talk to only replies to me for the sake of social convention. And that's all they ever do: reply. I can't remember a person made an attempt to start a conversation with me.
I'd love for a person to ask how my day's going on the regular. Maybe have somebody go out of their way to say "good morning" to me, if it's not too much to ask of them.
Give me something strong enough to help me forget that I exist, just like everyone else seems to have done.
i'll just have a small glass of water thanks
>she talks to me almost everyday
>tells me I'm good looking/nice
>I try ask her out
>'Anon, I'm sorry but I only see you as a friend'
>joining military soon
>just wanted to have a gf before I left
>will have no sweetheart to write back to
>will have no sweetheart to write back to
Are you my friend?
Will you stay with me, till' the very end?
Will you send letters of hopes and dreams?
And won't cry over the broken seams?
How long will it take
for you to see
That I love you,
even though it can not be
Maybe just try to hang out more often first and see where that goes? Of course there is the kind of friend you can talk to once a month with severing your bond with them, but are you sure she's really that type of friend? Maybe she wants to hang out with you more often but is too shy too ask, or maybe she just got over you. Only one way to tell I'm afraid.
Hey man, i read it and i hope she reads it too. Hope you feel a bit better having that written out though. Wanna talk about it? Anything i can get you?
the only road is to the grave,
and no other to this day
But at least you can say,
I'll take the scenic route this may
and maybe even live,
to try again, I say
But what about yesterday
The pain won't go away
>Maybe just try to hang out more often first and see where that goes? Of course there is the kind of friend you can talk to once a month with severing your bond with them, but are you sure she's really that type of friend? Maybe she wants to hang out with you more often but is too shy too ask, or maybe she just got over you. Only one way to tell I'm afraid.
I guess she has been really busy recently, but we're not getting any younger and I'm tired of waiting. Maybe age 20 will be the year...
Here you are, sir.
Well, so is he now, probably, if that makes you feel better.
What field are you in? You know, you can always turn professional NEET. It works for a lot of the lads here, or so i've heard.
Found out a girl I was seeing for a while has a boyfriend today. Which by all means I shouldn't be bitter about considering we broke it off in August and it's only logical that she would've found something else by now.
What bugs me isn't so much the fact that she moved on, but I didn't. Over a girl I can barely say I was going out with considering we went on dates maybe 4 times over the course of a month. It's the closest I've come to making a meaningful relationship in just about two years, hell, it's the closest I've ever come to having a legit relationship. But both of our situations were so screwy that it just couldn't work out.
I at least hope she's happy in whatever she's doing, no sense in both of us being miserable.
Writing just brings back the memories.
Why did I have to fuck it up. I will never forget the time I called her beautiful, and then her whole face turned red.
But anyway, I'll have a glass of water.
That does help a little.The movies paint a picture of everyone ending up with their special someone.The movies are full of shit.
I'm in school for Criminal Justice,I just need a damn part time job.
I can't do the NEET life.I was raised on a farm with "work as hard as you can until you die" drilled into my head since I was born.
Just give me a whole bottle of 151 to chug senpai.
I'm sick of my situation. My sister is on the spectrum, my mother is broken and pretty much dying. My father is on verge of lung cancer.
Father was an alcoholic who doesn't care about life. He says he just lives for his money and nothing more. He has a smokers cough now and his lungs are pitch black.
Mother has some sort of muscle condition. Her muscles are so tight that she can't often move and she just moans in pain and cries most of the day. No doctor knows what's wrong with her.
My sister is just scum. She constantly shits on me for no reason. She's overweight and makes fun of me for being average. I'm not mega skinny, but I'm not fat (6'3, 160 lbs). She has a flipout if something doesn't go her way. She starts yelling at people if they don't give her what they want. She yells at store clerks, she dresses with utterly no self-awareness anytime I go anywhere with her. She has a car that she spent 25,000 on, but literally never drives it. It's been sitting outside for 9 months...has not moved since. Car is probably fucked from the cold. She has the router and modem in her room. We've been having outage problems the past 3 weeks, and the technician won't come in and fix the modem but she throws a fit when someone enters the house.
The worst part of her, I had a girl I really liked come over my house to watch a movie. My sister sperged out and began to act like a retard. The girl told me that my sister creeped her out and doesn't really want to continue the relationship with me. That was 4 years ago, last relationship I've ever had because I can't bring someone over. On top of that, I am not allowed to bring any sort of friend into my home because of her. She forbids it, and if someone does, she throws an autistic rage fit until they leave.
I can't move out yet due to student loan debt. My credit isn't great, and she can't move out because she can't get another job.
>Maybe age 20 will be the year...
You know anon, even if things don't work out, we'll be here so you can come drink your sorrows away with us.
OP has left the building, but here you are lad. Just don't puke all over the bar.
Vodka coming up.
>But both of our situations were so screwy that it just couldn't work out.
At least you got the self-reflection a lot of people don't. it's not much of a comfort now, but i'm sure you'll come out stronger because of it in the long run.
>I at least hope she's happy in whatever she's doing, no sense in both of us being miserable.
Hey, it's okay to admit you want to set fire to her house, i won't hold it back on you.
One water, coming up. Writing can also help you to close some chapters. It hurts, but sometimes it's necessary to open up old wounds if you really want to get over things, i'm afraid.
Well, this bar has a few volunteers. But of course, that doesn't pay the bills, i know.
>I can't do the NEET life.I was raised on a farm with "work as hard as you can until you die" drilled into my head since I was born.
It kind of sounds like you did or are at least trying though, don't beat yourself up over it.
Who here /Nietzsche/? He said that the Ubermensch needed solitude and suffering to become great.
>a whole bottle
You sure? Your call mate.
>The worst part of her, I had a girl I really liked come over my house to watch a movie. My sister sperged out and began to act like a retard. The girl told me that my sister creeped her out and doesn't really want to continue the relationship with me. That was 4 years ago, last relationship I've ever had because I can't bring someone over. On top of that, I am not allowed to bring any sort of friend into my home because of her. She forbids it, and if someone does, she throws an autistic rage fit until they leave.
Do you have someone outside of your family to talk to? Because that shit is fucked up. Have you considered talking to your dean or counselor? My experience is that they know a thing or two that might help.
Christ, here's the bottle. I'll put it on the tab. Don't worry about it for now.
>i'm sure you'll come out stronger because of it in the long run.
In the same sense that if you throw a man out of a moving vehicle enough times he'll become immune to the impact. I'm not saying it's a good metaphor nor am I saying that I'm such a soft cunt that I'm going to let this bother me until the day I die, but a man can only bear so many bruises and broken bones.
>it's okay to admit you want to set fire to her house
Like I said, it's been half a year, I'm not that miffed. Now, if I found out that this happened a week or two after we called it off, not gonna lie, I'd be pretty pissed.
>>The worst part of her, I had a girl I really liked come over my house to watch a movie. My sister sperged out and began to act like a retard. The girl told me that my sister creeped her out and doesn't really want to continue the relationship with me. That was 4 years ago, last relationship I've ever had because I can't bring someone over. On top of that, I am not allowed to bring any sort of friend into my home because of her. She forbids it, and if someone does, she throws an autistic rage fit until they leave.
I have a few friends. I went to therapy for this over my problems with her. On top of this, when I was younger she sexually abused me. She used to make me suck on her tits for pleasure. I can't stand her. She just fucks everything up for me. She's 28 and still living at home. Never once though of moving out. She quit her job because she said "I just don't feel like going anymore." She gets interviews, but I can tell she probably spergs out during them or just acts in a hostile way.
>In the same sense that if you throw a man out of a moving vehicle enough times he'll become immune to the impact
More like next time you'll see the bat coming, but it's a shitty metaphor of me either way, sorry.
>a man can only bear so many bruises and broken bones.
You know, my grandpa used to say:
>A man is not defined by the choices he makes, but by the bones he breaks.
He did have osteoporosis though.
Here you are.
>I'm not sure how much longer I can keep going. I'm 100% alone.
Join the club, anon. Tell us what's bothering you, shared pain is half the pain.
Thanks, i'll try.
>He did have osteoporosis though.
Hey man, sorry about that. It gets busy and we're kinda disorganized at who does which shift and when. Here's a bottle of some quality whiskey, consider it a compensation gift, alright? I'll check to see if i missed anyone else and get back at you, okay?
Hang in there, brutha. Shit's too real.
One crazy morning coming up. Hey, i don't judge. This isn't the Chad's and Stacey's.
> I just want to be alone with her, without the sexual tension
What's stopping you from just hanging out? Sexual tension fades over time anyway, better be ready to have it last when that does, if you want anything past sex.
Tell you what, you call your mom to let her know how you're doing, drink's on the house. Deal?
Some extra absinthe coming up. Sorry for the delay, i missed someone else too, it's not just you, okay? Keep would've had my head if he was actually paying me.
You know, just vent. How _was_ your day? By the sound of it, it was rather shit. Sometimes people are just cunts without knowing it. Sometimes they know it but just don't care. I don't know what you can do about it, honestly. Some people just won't change. For example. sometimes i just feel like this guy:
Send her a postcard. Or call her in the evening then. It's the thought that counts. Please don't hamster yourself from doing it.
On the rocks it is, here you are.
>Life in general is going to shit and i think i'm addicted to misery.
Is your name darkness? Because you sound like an old friend.
JUST. DO IT. Don't talk yourself out of it. Tomorrow is the enemy of action, the killer of will. Of course, it's your call in the end. But like i said, you call her, drink's on the house.
You gotta post a picture of the drink, brah. Like this.
>do you think you two had perspective if she said yes?
Maybe, she doesn't have that much of a personality to clash with mine, but she still thinks is cool to have that detached emotionless personality. I mentioned England because my roommate is british and she's clearly into him, he has a girlfriend though.
>be me, 19 beta fag
>Go to uni with hope of not being beta anymore and getting friends
>School has one week of frosh week
>Move into residence and all seems well at first
>Go to restaurant first night
>Immediately put on table with the other beta fags
>Try to get friends during frosh week
>Start talking a little bit with the house\group (we are all split into houses based on our res location)
>The group pretends to like me
>Start thinking I have friends
>Go back to res one night
>Call parents and they ask why no one has been drinking
>Tell them I guess it's not a thing
>Hear some stuff in hall way while in room
>Watch as almost everyone from the group walk past my room to go to a party
>Had alcohol and cups and shit
>Spend night at door looking at people go by through the door peak hole
>People give me finger sometimes as they walk by, they think I'm not looking
>Mfw they all go and have fun while hating me
>Mfw they all come back slowly drunk and happy
>Spent whole night depressed in my room while watching people leave to have fun
>Ask about it the next day and no one tells me shit
Thanks brah, first time behind the bar for me, so appreciate it.
That's more than one red flag per sentence, anon. Better watch out to be honest.
Let me know how it went.
Not instigating shit, but it's been a while since we've had a second Columbine anyway, you know? Anything you sound like you could use a drink, what's your poison?
Gimme the strongest thing you've got.
>normies found out that i'm a virgin at school
>they spread the information around
>i get weird looks and laughs
>back to anime and vidya, will be dropping out next week
>normies found out that i'm a virgin at school
>they spread the information around
>shamed for being a virgin
Alright senpai, it's late so here's some vodka. But next time i'll be asking for some ID.
>That's more than one red flag per sentence, anon. Better watch out to be honest
For some reason this is the only one I feel that pull, like this is the one I have to get. Crazy shit anon, and she's not even that hot, she shouldn't be this difficult.
Barkeep, Blue Moon beer please. Tonight's been good, can't complain. Been drop kicking zombies off roof tops on Dying Light. Haven't had a girlfriend for two years, last relationship only lasted two weeks. Eh, not upset. She just doesn't know what she's missing, and no, I'm not being the smarmy "I'm a nice guy" meme. I cook, clean, and am working on becoming a paid highschool teacher. So all in all, tonight is a good night and I hope the other anons here get better soon.
how are my fellow west coasters of murrika doing? i currently have my furnace active to keep warm and avoid the rain. I'm with my family, non of whom are my age group, thus feeling pretty alone in the evening and while my little brothers attend HS.
even worse that i finish uni this spring. im ready to start a career but not ready to meet new people. My gf says I should try focusing only on finding work and keep in contact with friends from uni (she's 25, im 21, so i guess wisdom is wisdom).
Give me something strong and cheap. The prices are all marked up anyway, and you probably water it down.
I fucking just got scammed out of 800 dollars, and its all my fault.
Been working out for about a year now. My old gym closed down. Signed up to a nearby gym that was supposedly very friendly: they advertise that its an incredibly social gym. Even offer a free body composition, form and routine check up.
Tried it out, got my body comp, got some advice about grips and positions, and then they gasp when they see my OHP. Told me my shoulders were fucked up because I was doing them wrong. Put me on a massage table, poked around, felt pain, threw me in front of muscle charts, spoke at length about my problems and how they can get worse and that I need therapy to fix them.
And what did I do?
I signed on the dotted line.
I was so fucking worried that I was fucking myself up that I signed up for their goddamn massage program.
Spoke to the old gym owner, and they told me they didn't like the gym I signed up with. Why?
"When we went, they told us we had this problem with our shoulders. Gave us a bad massage, twisted our arm the wrong way, and then asked for like a grand to do 'therapy'. They're scam artists."
I couldn't bring myself to admit I fell for it. I just said I was using the equipment.
Whenever I trust someone, I get burnt. So I never trust anyone. And then people say I need to open up. Its so fucking hard for me, but I try to open up to the world. And then the world shows me that any time I open up, its just them waiting to bend me over and fuck me.
Were all just trying to eat each other. You get stronger by eating the weak, and the strongest got where they were by eating those weaker than them. If you're not eating someone, you're being eaten. That's all human interaction is.
"Be a better person than them!" "Trust others!" "Not everyone is like that!"
Yeah. That's more people saying to just climb into their smiling mouth so they can eat me easier.
That's fucking atrong bullshit, well deserving of needing a strong drink. I would demand a refund and search for a legal method via police if they can't comply, but I'm a robot that doesn't lift so what do I know.
Take care, anon. I'll keep it on the tab so you can focus on paying your bills this month.
I'm about out of wine, barkeep. have you got anything dry?
>love of my life broke up with me two weeks ago
>can see myself and my emotion clearly going through the stages of grieving
>don't want things to be over with him
>sure I'll never find someone I can love that truly and innocently again
better make it a double tanqueray and tonic in a short glass, barkeep. with lime, please.
Why do you say Uni if you're on the west coast? Kunuck?
Been raining for a week strait here in California. Everything burnt down last fall, so its not oretty, its just mud.
It's late but I need one more drink, how about a bookers? with plenty of ice?
take this tip: fuck the normies
I was a virgin throughout highschool. eventually wrote an app, and sold it in what would have been my sophomore year of college (had I gone). ended up pocketing 40 million on the sale, and now live better than any of the kids who went on to college. I live alone, but I live with everything at my fingertips, while they slave away just to get by.
I'll be honest with you. those popular girls from school, when they found out I had this money, I fucked each and every one of them. never looked back.
Now I just go to the bar (rarely because I hardly ever feel inclined toward sex nowadays) and pick out what I want, dazzle her a bit, and thats it, she comes back with me.
I live in new york, women will fuck anything they perceive as rich or powerful in this city
okay, how about this
are you looking to hire a personal chef? I'm an amazing cook and I could dazzle you with things you've never even heard of.
>tfw I've never wanted anything more than to be someone's personal chef
except that I'd like to own a restaurant one day, and if the restaurant is successful, I'd open a bakery right next door. bakeries have high operating costs with low income so they're really hard to make work as a standalone business.
now I'm just rambling. another drink!
Long Island Iced Tea, please
Mind hearing a story?
My dad keeps telling me to become a cop. He's a politician, to say the least, and we have a lot of connections. All I need to do is pass the tests and I'm in. From there I'll be starting off with an average salary but in a few years I can move up to $100,000 and up. I'll be able to retire when I'm 40 and my pension would get me, at the moment, 65% of what I originally made. If I retire as a lieutenant I'd be making $90,000 a year just to sit on my ass at 40 years old. All stuff my dad tells me, all true too. He also says to marry a school teacher or some girl like that, and I could start a family once I get my bearings. So what am I doing? I'm doing exactly as he says, not because he forces me, but because I feel like I have no other choice.
I have friends too. Yeah, I should leave at this point but everyone has problems, not all situations are the same, and while not all are legitimate problems some still are. I could go into detail about this but that's not what I'm here to talk about. Anyway, my problems with friends is that my feelings towards them aren't reciprocated. I will go out of my way to do things with friends, to please friends, to please anyone, really. I don't want anyone to be angry with me, I just want them all to accept me in whatever way they think is right. Because of this I will put a lot of effort towards being friends with them, but occasionally, despite me purposefully allowing feelings to get in the way (like whenever we're happy together), I'll think about the truth, which is I'm not looked at by them the same as they're looked at by me. This isn't a case of everybody's different though, I'm completely alone on this. Either I'm alone or I'm the luckiest man on the planet for finding such a similarly-thinking bunch of people.
I'm at the word count, if you want me to go on I will, otherwise I'll leave it at that
Doesn't sound like a bad situation at all to me. That's a cushy job. Don't let your parents tell you who to marry though. That will never bring you happiness.
Knock out a couple of cold ones quick and go to bed anonkun.
It's a terrible situation in my opinion.
Is that really all my life is supposed to be? Is that all there is to life in general? If that's the case, I don't see a point in continuing to go about this life, I'd rather see what the next one has to offer. This can't be it for this world, at least for me.
Meant to quote this dude obviously
That's not "all". You have to work, and you have to do something. You will end up doing something no matter what. Trust me, there are way worse ways to live your life, and they are in the majority. It's what you do with your free time what counts.
Maybe not, but wouldn't you rather have all that shit to distract you so the empty only comes at night instead of constantly?
People with enough to eat and a place to live who complain about thier loneliness disgust me.