I am conceptual. I am conceptual. I am conceptual. I am conceptual. I am conceptual. I am conceptual. I am conceptual. I am conceptual.
Posted here yesterday. I think it was yesterday. Worried if the government was watching me, to see if I'm really ill. I realize now though, it doesn't matter. I'm not a person; I'm a concept. All this time, I've just been a concept. It's why I'm drawn here. It's why we're all drawn here. Anonymous board where we can't distinguish between one-another. It could be only you and I exist here. That every post here is from two people. You, and I. Nothing and nobody else. I hate no need to fear the government, because I'm a concept, and so are they.
Is your name Patrick Bateman as well?
>You, and I
If you like big ideas, maybe check out Ich und Du by Martin Buber.
haven't read it kek
but studied it
It's about the metaphysics of relation, recognition, also about God.
Also Descartes has this weird idea in the Metaphysical Meditations, looking down on the street from his window, that maybe there are no men beneath the hats that he sees moving.
That Magritte painting (?) reminds me of that.
I'll add it to my reading list. I've currently been reading a great deal of recommendations from /lit/ and intend on authoring a few books someday. Don't much care for the money but wouldn't mind seeing my generic ideas take traction.
Yea yea a concept. Organize your thoughts before they translate into actions senpai.
What do you mean by concept? Don't get ahead of yourself, you can be diagnosed schizo or whatever and still have control over yourself.
I'm reading Infinite Jest currently (also from /lit/), I'm beyond page 400, it's boring in a strangely fulfilling way, with some moments of grace.
Been OCDing on gg maps Boston, about the fictional and real places referenced http://www.infiniteboston.com/
>Worried if the government was watching me
This is literally something that crazy people say all the time. Paranoid schizophrenics almost all are paranoid about the government watching them.
>implying the government is not watching everyone
>implying the govt isn't watching /r9k/, of all places
>implying nobody at NSA did a 30 pages memo about the meme or real status of "some of you guys are alright"
Don't even know what I'm diagnosed as, to be quite honest. I have an assistant type person who delivers unmarked, clear-cased tablets. I believe one of them was an SSRI from when I was in mid-high school, but unsure on the rest here.
Infinite Jest is on my reading list. Currently reading Clark and Swensen's translation of On the Genealogy of Morality.
I fear they watch me because they want to know if I'm really ill. And if they think I'm not ill, they'll cut my payments and I'll be homeless again. I don't want to be homeless again.
It's riveting, to say the least. Nietzsche's work was the reason I stopped washing away my thoughts with alcohol and instead face them. I'd remove medication from the equation if I could, but I feel that'd hinder those closest to me, and not just myself. Nietzsche truly had virtuous ethics.
yes, he's basically a healer.
though Irvin Yalom's "When Nietzsche Wept" is a good complement (Yalom imagines that Lou Andreas Salome (who rejected him for Paul Ree) pushes Nietzsche to go get help from a (early) psychoanalyst in Vienna)
I guess he was a wounded healer.
I was reading some articles about a mental breakdown he experienced in, I believe, mid-40's, or thereabouts. Thank you for surfacing "When Nietzsche Wept", think I'll add it relatively high on my to-read list.
>a wounded healer
Couldn't have described him better myself, anon. Glad to know there's more literate robots out there too.
I don't quite remember, honestly. A moment of paranoia spiraled me. I was in the shower, leaped out, and couldn't stop muttering it. I thought I made sense of my fears briefly, but I still feel fear, so it mustn't have been it.
You and I could be conceptual. But I couldn't prove it to you, only myself, which implies we'd be different concepts, if we were conceptual.
Actually it's what non-retarded people say. Even if you live in Bumfuckistan and are adirt farmer just because you're government isn't paying you much mind doesn't mean THE government isn't watching. King Nigger has the entire world tapped. They can even use satellites to laser on the glass of a window and through resonance shit make out what you're saying, and that's just what we know about. Noone is safe. For all we know they could have machines capable of reading your mind from the other side of the globe. Not that it matters really, since we already know every form of communication is already compromised.
I don't care for /x/. I went there once, but never again. And I don't know whether I'm schizophrenic, nor do I care. I enter the sterile room, discuss some of what I feel (only some, as I fear they'll involuntarily lock me up, like they once did my brother), and take the pills they hand me. Don't want to dwell in the delusions and posted here only because I'm well and truly a robot. Although perhaps a broken robot.
somehow unrelated, but let me drop that according to Hegel, truth = concept = time.
Kojeve wrote on this.
It means that truth is dynamic, like a concept.
Abstracting is not the same thing as killing or dying, it's a process. A focus.
What is a person? What is a subject?
"I'm in a chain of memories, it's my will"
Personally? I'm no virtuous philosopher, only an avid reader, but by personal agenda I believe 'self' is a concept allotted to us because of our marginal sentience. Whilst on a delusional state in high school, I was convinced the 'self' I once felt was deceased. Mind you, this was before the heavier medications they may have me on now.
Basically, I felt no 'self'. I had no recollection of memory, I was present but didn't feel present; lucid and abstract. If self-identity can die, I wonder whether self truly is conceptual.
Again though, this was pre-heavy medication. I was probably disoriented and didn't actualize.
Interesting two cents there, anon.
What a person is depends on whatever your culture tells you. If you remove yourself from the culture that tries to force you to believe what they believe, you realize the concept.
People want to tell you that humanity will eventually be wiped out and the universe will die too so they aren't held accountable for their actions, so they can just be drunken whores.
Science used to be limited to war, death. But not anymore.
This is the beginning of eternity.
>I was convinced the 'self' I once felt was deceased
During therapy (esp. writing, which can bring more results than a session with a shrink), I unearthed memories of my 9y/o self, before I decided to die, and forget that I decided to die, to save my mother.
I was writing at the library, almost in a state of trance. My eyes were like an eagle's. I caught a Subject looking at me. I could tell she was curious and wet, I was feeling on top of the world.
I had to die so that she could live. I had to forget about my sacrifice so that she could get all the credit she needed to survive.
I'm not saying I'm detecting the same thing in you, I'm just saying that yeah, finding one's self can be difficult, I don't know if you have any trauma in your past, maybe not
All I know is that writing can help. (also, being a "wagec.uck" can help, ofc)
>What a person is depends on whatever your culture tells you. If you remove yourself from the culture that tries to force you to believe what they believe, you realize the concept.
sometimes though, I wish I was in the parade https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=5swB3nDyXno