Who else here /cripplingalcoholism/?
>tfw literally trying to drink myself to death
>1.5L of Vodka every day
>dishonest with family because they would NEVER understand
Anyone else here going through this?
not quite /crippling/ (though I used to be, a few years back), currently at /somehow relatively functional/
the thing that helped me get over it was smoking weed. marijuana absolutely killed my desire for alcohol.
of course, then I started smoking way too much weed...and I had to stop.
now I'm back to booze.
Weed really helps with the withdrawl when I need to come off. I suspect I'm a schizo because even the lightest doses make me extremely paranoid. I usually feel like my life is ending if I do too much(more than a half hit).
>I suspect I'm a schizo because even the lightest doses make me extremely paranoid. I usually feel like my life is ending if I do too much(more than a half hit).
Nah that's just weed.
I spent like two years /high as balls/ as an experiment, I was going full-on into depersonalisation and derealisation, shit was nuts.
rampant paranoia and panic attacks are just part of the game after a certain stage. at first I'd be like "HOLY SHIT I AM FUCKING DYING HELP CALL THE POLICE CALL THE ARMY" then after a while I'd be like "I'm having a panic attack. Interesting."
...and that's basically why I stopped smoking so much weed.
>tfw back living with parents until uni starts again
>tfw cant start knocking back beers at 11am anymore
>tfw have to either stealth drink whiskey or just wait until they go to bed to get hammered
inconvenient but rather do that than have to deal with the fallout of them finding out about my drinking habits
That's my problem, sobriety is my problem so I'll take whatever I have available to not face it.
I usually flip between booze, weed and opiates but I've been known to fuck with benzos and ketamine too, when they're around.
I'm trying not to do that this year and have been mostly successful so far, only had a few drinks on Saturday and two on Sunday, but then I couldn't sleep at all on Sunday night and stayed awake for 30 hours.
Here goes round two I guess.
>wahhhh don't want to let go of the pain
>wahhhh the world is bad and I don't fit in
>wahhhh look at me and my self-destruction
>wahhhh this actually has meaning, it's not just my vanity
stop giving me that fucking wah wah, get your shit together it doesn't cost much
>That's my problem, sobriety is my problem so I'll take whatever I have available to not face it.
I'm doing good though, I only drink when the sun is down. well, except on my days off, when I have a brew or two in the morning. but I don't spend my days completely wasted anymore, so that's a plus. being a day-drinker is an incredible drag in so many ways.
I really want to go back to weed, just to cut myself off of booze. I was always better on weed than booze, and it's probably healthier in the long run.
I'm just worried that I'll go a bit nuts and get all antisocial, especially because right now I'm about as happy and extroverted as I've ever been, and I fear losing that.
being a human is really uncomfortable.
>get your shit together it doesn't cost much
it's really a matter of it just being so easy to fall into the trap again.
I've sobered up repeatedly and easily throughout my life. kicked all kinds of habits - weed, booze, cigs, WoW. I can drop anything at at moment's notice and feel fine.
it's just that after a while I think "you know, it's not so bad. I can control it now." and I do...for a while.
then it gets bad again.
like I said, being a human is really uncomfortable.