[Boards: 3 / a / aco / adv / an / asp / b / bant / biz / c / can / cgl / ck / cm / co / cock / d / diy / e / fa / fap / fit / fitlit / g / gd / gif / h / hc / his / hm / hr / i / ic / int / jp / k / lgbt / lit / m / mlp / mlpol / mo / mtv / mu / n / news / o / out / outsoc / p / po / pol / qa / qst / r / r9k / s / s4s / sci / soc / sp / spa / t / tg / toy / trash / trv / tv / u / v / vg / vint / vip / vp / vr / w / wg / wsg / wsr / x / y ] [Search | Free Show | Home]

/CPD/ General- Early Bird Edition

This is a red board which means that it's strictly for adults (Not Safe For Work content only). If you see any illegal content, please report it.

Thread replies: 318
Thread images: 89

File: 1496555975998.jpg (209KB, 1190x578px) Image search: [Google]
1496555975998.jpg
209KB, 1190x578px
FOR YOUR LISTENING PLEASURE

>>CPD Dispatch Stream:
http://www.broadcastify.com/listen/feed/763/web

>>Same feed with ambient music:
http://youarelistening.to/chicago

>>For Ambiance:
https://soundcloud.com/sithdemonic/sets/newwaveretro

Zone-6 (isolated scanner of worst area)
http://www.broadcastify.com/listen/feed/13262

#### #### #### #### #### #### #### ####

BACK THE BLUE
>>Get Behind the Vest donation drive:
http://www.getbehindthevest.org/
>Chicago cops aren't even issued fucking armor by their shithole city.

>>The Chicago Police Department Memorial Fund (ALSO GET SOME SWEET SWEET MERCH):
http://www.cpdmemorial.org/


#### #### #### #### #### #### #### ####

CHICAGO'S K/D RATIO:
>>Shootings ScoreboardS:
http://heyjackass.com
http://crime.chicagotribune.com/chicago/shootings/
http://crime.chicagotribune.com/chicago/homicides/
http://homicides.suntimes.com/

#### #### #### #### #### #### #### ####

>>Chicago Racial Demographics:
http://www.radicalcartography.net/index.html?chicagodots

>>Chiraq Gangland Map:
https://www.wbez.org/shows/wbez-news/in-chicago-gangs-abound-but-where-are-they/0d956c2e-171a-483a-8666-f5228d98812d

>>Police Codes:
http://www.bearcat1.com/radioil.htm

>>Chicago Police Dept. Directives:
http://directives.chicagopolice.org/directives/

>>Related twitter
https://twitter.com/spotnewsonig
https://twitter.com/hashtag/shitoemcsays


TONIGHT:


PASTEBIN: https://pastebin.com/pD418Eky

PREVIOUS THREAD: n/a
>>
File: CPD - TIRESOME 1.gif (934KB, 1605x1070px) Image search: [Google]
CPD - TIRESOME 1.gif
934KB, 1605x1070px
>>128519560
Ready to get comfy. I was just about to bake, kek.
>>
>The caller found a little girl in a dress, with no shoes wandering around by herself
This happens a lot. :(
>>
>Known heroin user
>Taken against her will across the south side
She gon' git raped.
>>
>Orange line MALE BLACK on drugs
>Threatening passengers
>Everyone's afraid to go up stairs to get on the train
>Adam en route
>>
ABOUT FIFTY SHOTS FIRED
>>
File: CPD - TSUN TSUN DISPATCH AWOO 1.png (358KB, 1200x900px) Image search: [Google]
CPD - TSUN TSUN DISPATCH AWOO 1.png
358KB, 1200x900px
watch your keys everybody!
>>
Evening, Adams. Any happenings last night after 2 am EST?

BTW, thanks for the bread, OP.
>>
Ah, so glad the bread is freshly baked.
>>
File: first.jpg (4MB, 3100x2325px) Image search: [Google]
first.jpg
4MB, 3100x2325px
Hey Roberts just tuned in, ready for a /comfy/ night.

>>128519560
Thanks for the bread, lost the pastebin.

>>128522083
What was that about? Dispatch say anything else?
>>
File: CPD - A E S T H E T I C 17.gif (142KB, 480x640px) Image search: [Google]
CPD - A E S T H E T I C 17.gif
142KB, 480x640px
>>128522581
>>128522645
>>128522788

Welcome back, lads. OP has apparently abandoned the thread. I posted what I heard so far.

>What was that about? Dispatch say anything else?
Caller reported it, Adam replied he was en route to check it out. Nothing yet so far.
>>
>https://pastebin.com/Dg1vqUDv
this pastebin has the "who the fuck is robert" bit in it.
>>
Four years of property tax increases
Four years of Sewer and water tax increases
Soda tax
E911 tax
Bag tax
"Surge" pricing for parking
Increased amusement taxes
Vehicle sticker fee increase
Cloud tax
Internet streaming tax
Garbage tax
where da MALE BLACK TAX yo
>>
>>128522904
Didn't abandon ship Robert, had to get up for a bit.
>>
File: CPD - A E S T H E T I C 22.gif (3MB, 3000x1686px) Image search: [Google]
CPD - A E S T H E T I C 22.gif
3MB, 3000x1686px
>>128523007
For some reason, other OPs always cut out my meme text. I don't know why.
>>
File: CPD Galaga.jpg (189KB, 1280x720px) Image search: [Google]
CPD Galaga.jpg
189KB, 1280x720px
Evening Lads and Lasses.
Keys checked.
Status: /comfy/
>>
>>128523122
Mighty bizarre, I always found it amusing
>>
File: CPD - A E S T H E T I C 9.gif (590KB, 1920x1280px) Image search: [Google]
CPD - A E S T H E T I C 9.gif
590KB, 1920x1280px
>>128523138
>that pic
You know, I can meme this even harder. Let me toy with it for a bit.
Welcome back, we are already popping.

>>128523120
Ah, cheers, m8.
>>
>dollar tree employee tried jumping on caller
>>
CAN YOU LET ME COMPLETE MY TRANSMISSION FIRST
>>
>CAN U LET ME COMPLETE MUH BROADCAST NEXT TIME? I WUZ ONNA SIMULCAST
Oh, Adam is CATTY tonight.
>>
File: mayhem.png (2MB, 1280x1600px) Image search: [Google]
mayhem.png
2MB, 1280x1600px
Can any Roberts supply some more bingo boards? I only have the one saved.
>>
>male black with blue underwear
so descriptive
>>
>throwing bottles
>riding motor scooters
>male black with blue underwear showing
>>
>throwing bottles and gang signs
>riding scooters
>blue underwear showing
COOOOOOONS!
>>
Sounds like the crips are in town
>>
File: galaga.jpg (22KB, 1280x720px) Image search: [Google]
galaga.jpg
22KB, 1280x720px
>>128523314
Here's the one I started with...just a quickie I did a couple weeks ago
>>
File: Weekend Bingo.jpg (623KB, 1280x1600px) Image search: [Google]
Weekend Bingo.jpg
623KB, 1280x1600px
>>128523647
Here ya go. The Mayhem Edition just hit the street last night and I was one spot away from blackout when i nodded off.
>>
>>128523903
thanks, I am being frustrated by google image search at the moment. no fucking pics of the top of CPD cop cars or helicopters.
>>
File: 1491186165493.png (485KB, 1280x1600px) Image search: [Google]
1491186165493.png
485KB, 1280x1600px
>>128523647
another one
>>
>they're drinking at setting off fireworks
>>
File: 1491698578645.gif (970KB, 1280x1600px) Image search: [Google]
1491698578645.gif
970KB, 1280x1600px
>>128523647
>>
>>128524234
>>128524417
Thanks, Robert.I ducked off pretty early last night and only got about six crossed off.
>>
>elderly mother beaten and robbed by two male blacks
>EMS declined
>>
File: 1465776570860s.jpg (4KB, 125x125px) Image search: [Google]
1465776570860s.jpg
4KB, 125x125px
What is going on here? My cones and rods feel so satysfied
>>
>>128524990
Wastes of air, those two.
>>
>female hispanic missing, 65-68
lol who would want to rape that consuela
>>
File: stop.jpg (147KB, 620x413px) Image search: [Google]
stop.jpg
147KB, 620x413px
>>128524326
Are they possibly just plain white?
>>
Adamscape is quiet ATM
>>
>>128525686
...fuck, You're right, I'm doing this all wrong.
>>
File: Fuuuuu01100011 01101011.gif (362KB, 720x720px) Image search: [Google]
Fuuuuu01100011 01101011.gif
362KB, 720x720px
I wonder how Robert puts up with this shit every night? Some of these calls are asinine (naked man masturbating on sidewalk), some of them are just plain fucked up. (Woman has children missing since Jan but "couldn't afford" to call 911 until April). If I had Roberts job I would be an 8 AM alcoholic.
>>
File: tiresome.png (114KB, 500x478px) Image search: [Google]
tiresome.png
114KB, 500x478px
>>128526156
someone asked something similar last night, I suggested they just become numb to it all
>>
>>128526156
lol, yea some of the calls are just friggin' crazy. There was one a few weeks ago when a guy called said someone broke into his house...3 years ago.

>5 shots heard
>>
>missing 17 year old
>>
>>128526485
>a guy called said someone broke into his house...3 years ago
No fucking way! Could it be a stupid prank or something?
>>
>just more fucking gang violence
>>
>Cermak and Damen
oh shiz 6 blocks away
>gotta git dat prescription from Walgreens
>>
File: ROBERT - A E S T H E T I C.gif (2MB, 3024x4032px) Image search: [Google]
ROBERT - A E S T H E T I C.gif
2MB, 3024x4032px
>>128526807
Back in march we heard a woman called in to report her kids had been missing since January 28th...and claimed she couldn't call the police because she couldn't afford to make the call, kek.
>>
>>128526807
No shit. Dispatch called it out seroius like and Robert responded "We'll get right on that." Funny AF.
>>
File: mfw when reading that post.gif (2MB, 600x408px) Image search: [Google]
mfw when reading that post.gif
2MB, 600x408px
>>128527093
are people really this stu....
blacks...
people....
>>
>two to three males in the abandoned house smoking drugs
>>
>>128526450
> I suggested they just become numb to it all
I think that they would have to at some point.

>>128526485
> a guy called said someone broke into his house...3 years ago.
How the fuck did that guy expect them to solve a 3 year old burglary?

>in the house smoking druuuugs
>>
File: phone-and-ebt.png (195KB, 300x428px) Image search: [Google]
phone-and-ebt.png
195KB, 300x428px
>>128527319
Did you forget male blacks are on welfare, Robert?
>>
>>128526485
>>128526807
>>128527414

No, I remember that call. Somebody got shot in his house 3 years ago.
>>
File: mars attacks watching from mars.jpg (58KB, 948x683px) Image search: [Google]
mars attacks watching from mars.jpg
58KB, 948x683px
I think I just heard aliens on the youarelistening stream
>>
File: 1490304397226.gif (338KB, 538x572px) Image search: [Google]
1490304397226.gif
338KB, 538x572px
>m80s and fireworks in the alley
>cops told them to "cut it out" earlier
>>
Robocop = Detroit not Chicago.
>>
>>128527910
ALL DESE MALE BLACKS ARE LIT A WHOLE MONTH EARLY
>somebody take Black History Month away from these niggas
>>
File: Robert-Cop-Bootleg-7-550x396.jpg (52KB, 550x396px) Image search: [Google]
Robert-Cop-Bootleg-7-550x396.jpg
52KB, 550x396px
>>128528037
it's Robertcop
>>
>loud "woo" in the background
>>
File: GoingForHighScore.jpg (21KB, 440x440px) Image search: [Google]
GoingForHighScore.jpg
21KB, 440x440px
>>128527855
Nope, just this glorious Robert
>>
File: CPD - BLUES BROS KEYS 1.gif (176KB, 564x423px) Image search: [Google]
CPD - BLUES BROS KEYS 1.gif
176KB, 564x423px
CHECK YO KEY ON ZONE 13
>>
File: CPD stares in dispatch.jpg (3MB, 4662x3108px) Image search: [Google]
CPD stares in dispatch.jpg
3MB, 4662x3108px
damn dispatch is PMSing hard over open key
>>
>middle eastern couple with walkie talkies communicating with each other in the train station
>>
Middle eastern people with Walkie talkies?
>>
>>128528333
well fug
>>
Hadjis with handhelds?
>>
>>128528333
>>128528391
>not sure if up to no good or looking to get law suit pay out
>>
>>128528333

>ROBERT, CHECK THEIR KEYS

>IMMEDIATELY!
>>
File: CPD - KEYGAMES 1.gif (162KB, 720x383px) Image search: [Google]
CPD - KEYGAMES 1.gif
162KB, 720x383px
CHECK YOUR KEYS ADAM
>>
>intruder alert
>>
>>128528519
New to Chicongo threads, can I get a rundown?

Is Robert one guy or code for the cops?

Wtf is check yo keys?
>>
>>128528138
I stand corrected haha

"Your Move Cretin" I guess would be his catchy one liner.

"Dead or Alive you're not coming with me"
>>
>mr wong was robbed of his vehicle
>>
>>128528690
Robert at night
Adam at day
both mean police officer (i think)

Check Yo Keys means someone doesn't know how to use a walkie-talkie and forgot to close the transmission
>>
Roberts going live with body cameras. Don't be mad though
>>
File: CPD Robert callsighns.png (138KB, 1080x624px) Image search: [Google]
CPD Robert callsighns.png
138KB, 1080x624px
>>128528690
keys are the mic keys on the radios, sometimes they stick
>roll call will be late, we are going live with body cameras
Robert is getting body cams? oh boy!
>>
File: 2scoops.jpg (28KB, 500x262px) Image search: [Google]
2scoops.jpg
28KB, 500x262px
check your keys
>>
Did just Adam asked the dispatch not to be mad at him for the open key?
>>
>intoxicated female white
watch out!
>>
>Report of a white female, drunk, attacking him ... sound familiar?
>>
>>128528834
>>128528891

Thx
>>
File: femhorseychimp.jpg (33KB, 175x235px) Image search: [Google]
femhorseychimp.jpg
33KB, 175x235px
She's crazy
>>
File: 1468036081903.jpg (99KB, 960x686px) Image search: [Google]
1468036081903.jpg
99KB, 960x686px
Someone needs to make a movie with the vaporwave aesthetic, ambient soundtrack and a protagonist like Travis from Taxi Driver.
>>
File: 1496611682469.gif (2MB, 400x225px) Image search: [Google]
1496611682469.gif
2MB, 400x225px
>>128529118
>filename
>>
>>128529161
What was Drive?
What was Nightcrawler?
>>
>>128529386
Not the same
>>
>>128529161
Only God Forgives is *sorta* what you're looking for
https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=97yD9eoSr44
https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=jzlynSZ7p7k
>>
>>128529161
Someone needs to make a oregon trail-like game where you play as a Male Black 15 year old trying to survive to the age of 21 on the mean streets of Chicago.
>>
>subject keeps coming back...trying to enter store

What is it with nigs and refusing to leave places?
>>
>>128529714

You can still die from starvation and dysentery.

>little Tyrone died from a gang shooting
>>
>>128529808
no idea. but even the direct threat of electrocution doesn't faze them. GRSE wouldn't exist if this wasn't true.
https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=bglIAUaCVhU
>>
>>128529990
>You were killled by La Raza and they took your mixtape

>[SHEEEIIIT]
>>
File: H._P._Lovecraft,_June_1934.jpg (17KB, 285x352px) Image search: [Google]
H._P._Lovecraft,_June_1934.jpg
17KB, 285x352px
>>128529714
I would play that game just for the laugh at all those crazy names

>Shatisha
>Tyshonna

>tfw I have never heard these names in my life and just tried to make up some shit, yet they actually exist
>>
>>128529714
Starting jobs - drug dealer, pimp, junkie,
>>
>>128530283
well....
http://www.newcity.com/2009/09/22/unhappy-birthday-the-murder-of-young-artist-j-def-is-not-the-end-of-his-story/
>>
>more fireworks, this time in the middle of the road
>>
>Marine unit is called in
>>
>listening to that female officer describe the crime scene
>excruciating
>>
>>128530384
>you have died of dissin' Terry
>>
Stable is not a condition, Adam.
>>
File: CPD - A E S T H E T I C 13.gif (311KB, 1024x685px) Image search: [Google]
CPD - A E S T H E T I C 13.gif
311KB, 1024x685px
>>128530830
MarineRobert deployed!

>>128530384
>those crazy names
It would need a random hood name generator.

>>128530412
You start as "aspiring rapper" and your decisions change that over time.
>Mixtape in yo inventory, Best rep dat shit boi!

>>128530452
I'm sure Pilsen transformed into an urban utopia after that parade.

>>128531157
Hhahaha fuck.
>>
>>128531293
Glad you got a laugh, but be careful with that joke its an antique.
>>
>>128531293
funny you should say that; all the mexicans are trying to save their town from being taken over from UIC and the hippies/normies by coming up with block-wide mexican festivals that celebrate "MUH HERITAGE" and "MUH TORTILLA"
>two weeks ago half of 18th street was blocked thanks to a mole festival.
>>
File: La Migra.png (151KB, 500x610px) Image search: [Google]
La Migra.png
151KB, 500x610px
b-but Tyrone dindunuffin. His mammy got mad and called La Migra
>>
>[chimpish screeching]
>>
what the hell was that yelling in the background just then?
>>
>>128530412
With a branching story, life of crime on one side, good boi on the honor roll just trying to get money for dem programs on the other side.
>>
>>128531738
The result is the same though.
>>
>>128531954
Only thing that changes is the language of the obituary/Newspaper article, kek.
>>
WATCH YOUR KEYS
>>
What does "watch your keys" mean?
>>
>Cop thanking the dispatch
Scratch that one off your bingo card folks
>>
>dispatch a barrel of laughs
>>
>I've been here since 5:30AM it's time to go home!
...I suddenly want to buy dispatch some flowers, and a gift basket with those girly bath beads and shit. :(
>>
File: 1495436044119.gif (3MB, 1080x720px) Image search: [Google]
1495436044119.gif
3MB, 1080x720px
>NINE
>NINE SHOTS FIRED
>AH AH AH
>>
File: cpd check those keys adam.png (548KB, 1024x768px) Image search: [Google]
cpd check those keys adam.png
548KB, 1024x768px
>>128532607
the mic keys on their radios ket stuck sometimes resulting in a hot mic
>>
>>128532701
Why are so many dispatchers women?
>>
>>128532889
Female voices get more attention.
>>
>>128532889
If they want that job and can perform - why not, Robert?
Also, there are some psychological reasons involved, something about woman's voice getting more attention.
>>
>>128532889
same reson the warning voice in planes is female, female voices demand attention
>>
oh shit is that the airship?
>>
>>128529714
I want to make a Robert Doom mod. Kinda like Moon Doom but better.
>>
FIRST WATCH
>>
>AirRobert, MarineRoberte and Robert are all looking for something on the beach by the lifeguard stations
Interesting...
>>
>>128533351
I think earlier they mentioned some females in the water.
>>
>>128533498
>females in the water.
but blacks can't swim
>>
>>128533498
F

>10 males jumping on one male
>>
>>128533740
that's exactly why all the Roberts are headed there
>>
>garbage can on fire
>>
>>128533351
They're looking for the ratings of the new Bay Watch movie at the bottom of the sea.
>>
>Sitting on a hydrant
Sounds uncomfortable.
>>
>Good morning
What did she mean by this?
>>
BIG BIG sale on M80s every year
>imported from Indiana cause they don't give a fuck
>>
>>128534346
Sarcasm
>>
File: loud-boom.jpg (97KB, 405x304px) Image search: [Google]
loud-boom.jpg
97KB, 405x304px
>>
Check your keys lads
>>
>>128534346
They are first shift. They'll be working until 5AM local time. (It just turned 10PM) They always start their shifts by saying good morning.
>>
>EMS is coming out for a man that is naked
>>
>MALE NAKED CAME INTO THE SONIC
>>
>Naked man cumming in Sonic
>>
Naked man in the sonic
>>
>naked man came into the Sonic
>when your hungry but naked
>>
File: 2770233-9913215536-14199.jpg (64KB, 480x600px) Image search: [Google]
2770233-9913215536-14199.jpg
64KB, 480x600px
>Man
YOU WILL PAY DEARLY FOR MISGENDERING ME, JERKOP
>>
Robert needs his gat you punk as bitches
>>
Dem Greeks makin' too much noise
>>
>>128534847
Is that a Chris chan mugshot?
>>
>JUST RELAX.
Ahahaha
>>
I like to get high and listen to robert slap coons
>>
>>128519560
I call it house work

cuz it light work
>>
File: Coco Pepe.jpg (106KB, 1000x1000px) Image search: [Google]
Coco Pepe.jpg
106KB, 1000x1000px
Good Evening Roberts, anything crazy happen yet?

I need to switch over to the CPD scanner, on Bucks County right now do to a reverse 911 and a escaped prisoner
>>
File: CPD beating niggers.gif (2MB, 600x338px) Image search: [Google]
CPD beating niggers.gif
2MB, 600x338px
>>128535231
>slap coons
>>
Wait, how do you know to check your keys if your talk button is down? Are they listening to dispatch on something other than their walkie?
>>
I love these crazy coon names
>>
>>128535057
No, That's Chris Cornell 3 months before he died
>>
>>128535057
Yeah, you didn't know he went to prison? He's also a tranny now. Look it up.

>>128535465
>Tiarra """""White"""""
>>
File: WP_20170604_21_47_03_Pro.jpg (2MB, 3264x1840px) Image search: [Google]
WP_20170604_21_47_03_Pro.jpg
2MB, 3264x1840px
howdy lads, 847 robert here, posted up with a whiskey coke, feelin the comfy.
>>
>>128535406
talk buttons stick after a while
>>
>>128535561
MMR vaccine is a hell of a drug
>>
File: bismuth.gif (2MB, 320x310px) Image search: [Google]
bismuth.gif
2MB, 320x310px
>>128535561
I knew the tranny part. But I-
>Chris was spotted vandalizing a Sonic Boom display in a GameSpot. He assaults the security guard on the way out with pepper spray. A call made by our forum members ...
HOLY FUKKEN SHIT I'M DYING. LEGIT DYING.
>>
Chiraq is bumping tonight

20 sector 20 mintu3e of wife stqbbing
>>
>>128535057
You know that was a weird fucking day for that cop.
>>
>>128535406
>Wait, how do you know to check your keys if your talk button is down? Are they listening to dispatch on something other than their walkie?

Partner's radio in a two-man car, no idea about 99s
>>
>threatening suicide
>going to jump on the third rail
>>
>Male white
RARE
A
R
E
>>
WHITE BOIS TAGGING THE WALL
>Aint no Grove Street
>>
>>128536089
No amount of purell would make it feel better.
>>
>>128536830
>purell
kek
>>
File: 1495767004243.gif (999KB, 400x225px) Image search: [Google]
1495767004243.gif
999KB, 400x225px
>>128536618
let's see where this goes from here...
>>
>8 coons broke into a business, they are inside drinking and vandalizing the place
YA FUCKED UP TYRESE.
>>
>>128537246
Too stupid to leave the scene of the crime, classic male black
>>
>>128537246
dealing with minimal brain power
>>
>exceptionally profane male white
>>
>>128519560
Coming late to the party.
>>
>>128537333
>>128537565
Sounded like it was the security company watching them on camera, kek.
>>
>>128537578
>exceptionally profane

That's actually impressive. I wish someone would call me that.
>>
>>128537648
There's this commercial where a robbery hijack is happening and the security guard says "Yep, it's a robbery".

It's kind of like that, kek
>>
>>128537682
agreed. it suggests a certain artistic quality
>>
Male black the darkest of coons
>>
>>128535314
is that graphic your work btw? its tastful. also been hearing alot of this reverse 911 talk lately
>>
File: 1495946883699.gif (167KB, 635x439px) Image search: [Google]
1495946883699.gif
167KB, 635x439px
>>
>OTHER THAN THAT
>hes clear
kek
>>
File: male black.png (81KB, 198x223px) Image search: [Google]
male black.png
81KB, 198x223px
>>128538747
thats a stache to strive for
>>
File: 1496372623651.jpg (334KB, 668x945px) Image search: [Google]
1496372623651.jpg
334KB, 668x945px
>>
Howdy, Robert. Good morning.
>>
File: CPD is comfy 1.jpg (390KB, 1024x792px) Image search: [Google]
CPD is comfy 1.jpg
390KB, 1024x792px
>>128539488
Gooood morning, Robert. Things have slowed down a bit, the game let out just a little while ago, several calls in progress. Pull up a chair.
>>
SWIMMER STILL MISSING AT THE BEACH
>>
>DRIVING WESTBOUND IN THE EASTBOUND LANE
>>
File: IMG_8211.jpg (72KB, 406x480px) Image search: [Google]
IMG_8211.jpg
72KB, 406x480px
>westbound in an eastbound lane
>>
File: 1360532188607.png (117KB, 635x399px) Image search: [Google]
1360532188607.png
117KB, 635x399px
>>128539758
Niggers. Like fucking lemmings, baka.
>>
>>128539758
F
>>
>>128535605
How much whiskey a day do you have to drink to deal with MALE BLACK
>>
>>128539856
>tfw not on a bingo board
>>
>>128540210
NOT ENOUGH
>cops killing themselves over male black niggerness
>>
>>128538747
Sabotage, one of my all-time favorite music videos
>>
File: I don't get it.jpg (56KB, 960x720px) Image search: [Google]
I don't get it.jpg
56KB, 960x720px
>>128529714
It consistently surprises me that niggers survive all the dumb decisions/other niggers to live to be 21.
>>
>>128540210
im not a x whiskey a day guy, but if i was robert, i might be drowning in it
>>
>Secret Service motorcade
!!!?!?!
>>
Secret Service?
>>
File: 1496030162989.png (1MB, 1280x640px) Image search: [Google]
1496030162989.png
1MB, 1280x640px
>has been howling and crying for hours
>wondering if something is wrong
ya think?
>>
SECRETE SERVICE MOTORCADE
>>
File: okitsu.png (197KB, 402x628px) Image search: [Google]
okitsu.png
197KB, 402x628px
>Secret Service Motorcade
>>
WTF is the SS doing in Chicago tonight?? Who's there??
>>
>>128540829
THE DONALD IS ON SITE
I REPEAT
THE DONALD IS ON SITE
>>
>>128540849
it's close to the Trump Tower
>>
>>128540849

Probably Obongo
>>
>theyre arguing and she tried to bite him
dayum, not gf material
>>
>>128540849
Just Obama swinging by to check out his old stomping ground
>>
File: 1495684687583.jpg (26KB, 450x562px) Image search: [Google]
1495684687583.jpg
26KB, 450x562px
Trump's Administration working Real Robert Hours?
>>
File: 1495942466681.jpg (192KB, 768x1024px) Image search: [Google]
1495942466681.jpg
192KB, 768x1024px
>>128540964
where is it?
>>
i drive uber in Chicongo during weekends.. Sometimes I end up in one of these nignog turfs in West side or Southside...

Gotta tell ya, you aint seen anything like it. It's legit like a milder version of some Libyan nightmare. Ran down houses and roads... despondent nogs walking around and about.. Trash every-fuckin-where.. Poverty in every sense of the word for miles.

It's really a fuckin trip, considering I live in a well-off hipster part of Chicago.
>>
>>128541161
You got stories, senpai?
>>
>>128541067
Most likely, the Obamas really like this city.
>>
File: drump-dower.png (339KB, 866x835px) Image search: [Google]
drump-dower.png
339KB, 866x835px
>>128541129
about 4-5 blocks away. The purple paint line is Lake Shore Drive, where that giant WESTBOUND ON EASTBOUND accident is goin on
>>
>armed and danger - us
>>
File: 1487215628968.jpg (53KB, 600x549px) Image search: [Google]
1487215628968.jpg
53KB, 600x549px
>>128540849
pence was on the south side for a funeral of a family member
>>
Evening Roberts, did I miss anything good?
>>
>>128541637
just some standard noggery. others may have specifics
>>
>>128541637
Secret Service Motorcade, and a MALE BLACK group broke into a liquor store and didn't really...flee the scene (yet)
>also, a swimmer is missing still
>>
File: 1496030393870.gif (2MB, 2834x2125px) Image search: [Google]
1496030393870.gif
2MB, 2834x2125px
>>128541420
thanks, Robert
>>
>>128541755
sick graphic. yours?
>>
>>128541742
>>128541719
Ah, so nothing truly decent.

>potential gas leak
Might be interesting.
>>
>a strong odour in the hallway
>could be a gas leak
>>
GAS LEAK
>GAS LEAK
GAS LEAK
>GAS LEAK
GAS LEAK
>GAS LEAK

TAKE A MATCH per Dispatch
>>
closing the beach

drunkards inbound!
>>
>>128541955
confirmed lack of decency
>>
>silver Porsche driving at a high rate of speed
>>
Porsche cayenne
>>
File: cloudchicago_cover copy.jpg (1MB, 1600x900px) Image search: [Google]
cloudchicago_cover copy.jpg
1MB, 1600x900px
who got the porsche cayenne meme?
>>
>cullerton
>shots in the alley
THAT'S MY HOUSE GODDAMMIT
>>
File: 51575-Crazy_Taxi_(PAL)-2.jpg (82KB, 632x460px) Image search: [Google]
51575-Crazy_Taxi_(PAL)-2.jpg
82KB, 632x460px
Car all over the road, clearly trying to get more money for those close calls
>>
File: 55yt.jpg (79KB, 614x441px) Image search: [Google]
55yt.jpg
79KB, 614x441px
>>128542408

What?
>>
File: Robert-1-ANIMATED-1X.gif (4MB, 1500x996px) Image search: [Google]
Robert-1-ANIMATED-1X.gif
4MB, 1500x996px
>>128542261
>>128542281
BUT WHERE'S THE WHITE ONE??!??

>>128541944
Thanks, m8s. I work to enhance the average level of comfy.
>>
>>128542281
>>128542261
wasnt there one a while back also driving around like a maniac? Might be the same dude.

>>128542441
YAH YAH YAH YAH YAH!
>>
How comfy are you, roberts? Currently sitting in my warm Chicago apartment while cats stroll by preparing to smoke aromatic Virginia tobacco from a pipe with goldfish crackers for snacks and fancy ginger ale to wash it down with.
>>
FOAMING AT THE MOUTH
>>
>15 yo female foaming at the mouth
>>
>foaming at the mouth, 15 yo female
>>
>15 year old female foaming at the mouth

She's got the rabies, Robert.
>>
>rabid feminazis

this city is downright apocalyptic after dark
>>
File: 1496031457288.gif (2MB, 800x487px) Image search: [Google]
1496031457288.gif
2MB, 800x487px
>>128541944
nah, but the creator was posting his OC in one of last week's threads, and I saved a bunch
>>
>>128542487
Gangs always shoot up the alleys near my house, as well as offending streets near my house. I'm always hearing gunshots nightly if they ain't fireworks. It's...interesting
>oop there go the Roberts
>>
>>128542679

WHY ARE YOU LIVING IN THE SOUTH SIDE OF CHICAGO?
>>
>>128542679
RIP in peace senpai
>>
>>128542855
>hipster
He's west more like.
>>
>>128541290
Nothing crazy really. I avoid picking up any obviously ebonic names such as Jammaal (swear to god this was real), LaQuisha, Taevon, etc, etc. Obviously most people that Uber in Chicago are well-to-do civilized people. The only time I end up in nignog turfs is on my way back to the city after a trip to outside of it.

One ministory though:

I was making through my way through the Southside on the freeway and miraculously got a trip so I figured I should check it out. Of course, being in the thick of the Southside I was mindful of who I was picking up.

Where I ended up, was extremely bizzarre. I've never seen anything like it. I can only describe it as a nignog 'village'. It was sort of like a factory-produced compound for nogs who live on gimmiedats. I can tell this was the case for few reasons: all the 'houses' looked exactly the same. Sterile, no real architectural design, obviously designed with the barest of effort in mind to cram as many people you can without violating city codes. Second, there were nigglets and teenchimps EVERY WHERE, and it was almost midnight on a school day. It was like that scene in that Vice video where Shane pulls into a nog village in a car and EVERYBODy stares at you.

And finally, the rider who requested the ride, was a sheboon, who tried, and I shit you not, to cram 10 fuckin kids from ages 1-13 into my 5 people Sedan (all of which were her kids...) I told her there is no way I can fit all those kids into my car and that I'm going to have to decline this trip, as the sheboon angrily yelled in ebonics: "WAZ DA PRAABLUM I'S DO DIS ALL DA TIME!" as i drove away...

This sheboon is producing literally 5xs the amount of your average civilized couples at the rate that is probably even bigger than 5xs, funded by our tax dollars. She was even able to get a smartphone and afford to uber around.
>>
File: 1496632069062.jpg (27KB, 500x208px) Image search: [Google]
1496632069062.jpg
27KB, 500x208px
>>
File: 1496034187671.gif (829KB, 2000x1126px) Image search: [Google]
1496034187671.gif
829KB, 2000x1126px
>>128542505
your work is appreciated, Robert
>>128542531
medium comfy. just finished making some tasty zucchini pancakes, and now I'm laying down listening to the feed
>>
>>128542531
Glass of bourbon and all the windows open at my apartment in my 93.9% White burb community
>>
>>128543185
>freeway
Kys
>>
>she screamed
>Call dropped off
>Call going straight to voicemail
F
>>
>Female was on the phone walking home from work
>Then screamed and call dropped
>Its now going to voicemail
F
>>
File: 1496126152982.jpg (143KB, 895x1024px) Image search: [Google]
1496126152982.jpg
143KB, 895x1024px
>>128542505
your OC? mean level of /comfy/ has gone up with those types of images
>>
lmao, you get as much crime in a day as we do in a year
>>
File: typical-alleyway.jpg (162KB, 1233x807px) Image search: [Google]
typical-alleyway.jpg
162KB, 1233x807px
>>128542855
lower west side, near UIC
>my grandma, really. she's 70 and doesn't wanna move out to start over. every year i'm trying to convince her. for the location, im right across from a popular park that has gang activity all the time.
>it's weird watching little kids 8-12 years old at the basketball area staring at the opening to the alley JUST for other gangs
>>
Foaming at. The mouth
>>
File: IMG_5575.jpg (184KB, 585x748px) Image search: [Google]
IMG_5575.jpg
184KB, 585x748px
>>128542531

Sitting comfy in my apartment in California, enough of a time difference so I can listen to some RRH and still get to sleep early enough for work tomorrow
>>
File: CPD - RATCHET 2.jpg (962KB, 1536x2048px) Image search: [Google]
CPD - RATCHET 2.jpg
962KB, 1536x2048px
>>128543212
>>128543466
T-thank you senpais. I'm not the only one tho. Repping VietRobert's movie posters
>>
>>128543565
in hong kong? is that city not full of degeneracy?
>>
>>128543604
Kinda late leaf bro, refresh your feed.
>>
>>128543693
Nice.
>>
File: 1496030996107.png (1MB, 731x900px) Image search: [Google]
1496030996107.png
1MB, 731x900px
>>128543702
>movie posters
is this his work?
>>
File: head nod.gif (1MB, 499x499px) Image search: [Google]
head nod.gif
1MB, 499x499px
>>128543702
kek thats awesome. that looks like an effort png, that overturned SUV. the layers bro..
>>
>>128542571
It, really, really is. But only in the West and South side though. Honestly, downtown Chicago and the areas surrounding it is very nice even after dark.
>>
File: CPD - RATCHET 1.jpg (1MB, 1536x2048px) Image search: [Google]
CPD - RATCHET 1.jpg
1MB, 1536x2048px
>>128544046
They're all this good. All 5 of them, kek.

>>128543929
Negative. That is another anon.
>>
>male
>shot seven or eight times
>being uncooperative
>>
File: mayberry11.jpg (57KB, 720x480px) Image search: [Google]
mayberry11.jpg
57KB, 720x480px
>>128543565
They get more crime in chicago in a day then my town has had in its entire history
I live in a small town (pop 20000) 99.99% white
in fact we have one black family, he works at a sportplex, has two daughters in high school
we have a couple of asian families
last gun crime was last summer, some teenagers got ahold of dads shotgun, and it was found hidden in a barn.

Its like living in Mayberry mane.
>>
>>128544373
What if he was gutshot?
>>
>>128544474
why would you be uncooperative when the doctors are trying to save you from bleeding out?
>>
>>128544373
NIGGA GET OFF ME NIGGA

NIGGA I AIN'T PAYIN FUH NO AMBERLAMPS NIGGA

AYY LEMME OUT DIS VAN I GOTS TA HUSTLE

SHEEEIIIT
>>
>>128544373
wuz a gud boi, cumin hum frum chuch
>>
>>128544546
Injuries make people do weird shit.
>>
>11 murders in 4 days

Damn shit's really been poppin off while I've been gone
>>
We wuz roberts
>>
>>128540210
My alcoholism cleared right up when I quit.
>>
>>128544594
Dindu nuffin
>>
File: baneom.jpg (26KB, 535x364px) Image search: [Google]
baneom.jpg
26KB, 535x364px
>>128544705
they got to pratice up, July 4 be coming.
>>
>>128544705
This whole weekend was one rolling GSW casualty fest. Some nigga was going to the hospital like every 40-50 minutes it sounded like.
>>
File: checkyourkeysbo.jpg (50KB, 500x330px) Image search: [Google]
checkyourkeysbo.jpg
50KB, 500x330px
>>128544801
when you quit male black or whiskey?
>>
File: 1360529372191.jpg (25KB, 480x600px) Image search: [Google]
1360529372191.jpg
25KB, 480x600px
>>128544682
Dude. It's just another nigger who won't 'snitch'. There's no mystery.
>>
>>128544872
This, it was all over WGN this morning.
>>
>>128544827
>practice up
lol, in any other context that would be ridiculous.
>>
File: 1496034569403.png (1MB, 970x645px) Image search: [Google]
1496034569403.png
1MB, 970x645px
>>
File: 1496030766555.gif (1003KB, 1920x1331px) Image search: [Google]
1496030766555.gif
1003KB, 1920x1331px
>>128544205
wow, a different Robert? pretty cool how much content is getting created for these threads
>>
>>128544872

16 shootings today alone on heyjackass, and that's only up to 9pm
>>
File: 1491030920390.jpg (129KB, 700x529px) Image search: [Google]
1491030920390.jpg
129KB, 700x529px
>>128545081
Bro, I have a hard time understanding how man OC freaks these threads have accumulated.
>>
looks like some sperg forgot to get his tendies
>>
>>128545019
>>128545125
I believe it! Warm weather hit and out they came to settle scores and hustle
>>
>>128544954
De poleese fose nigga
>>
File: coon70.png (407KB, 649x599px) Image search: [Google]
coon70.png
407KB, 649x599px
>>128545081
the its all so tiresome one from last night is one of best imo
person shot
green 2007 jeep
1150 robert is waiting for bodysnatchers
>>
>>128545081
>>128545225
i read alot of threads on this site, this is my favorite, partially because i live so close but the OC is reaching levels that shouldn't be possible. even the leaf bros are tapping into the robert mentality. its nutty
>>
>someone flying a drone

That's the least of Chicongos problems
>>
>somebody is flying a drone above the scene
Nogs have drones now?
>>
>>128545399
so you quit dealin with male black
AND....
the alcoholism cleared up

sounds about right
cant imagine what its like getting calls every hour to go deal with some gangbangin crack monkey with a gun
I'd rather be back in afghanistan!
>>
>>128545539
Probably because we aren't engaging in the universal shit-flinging that 4chan does.
>>
File: Robert Season 2 2017 1.png (2MB, 900x1200px) Image search: [Google]
Robert Season 2 2017 1.png
2MB, 900x1200px
>>128545539
comfy times, relaxing music, polite company, and art therapy. On fucking /pol/ of all places.
>>
>>128545697
>>128545710
HE'S BACK!! HOLY FUCK THE DRONE MURDER VOYEUR IS BACK. He hasn't been reported on in almost a month!
>>
>>128545710
They were selling them at 7/11 for like 50 bucks a few years ago
>>
>>128545820
Whos that?

Can you explain?
>>
>>128545854
so male black was using his five finger discount a few years ago then?
>>
>>128545939
several times this year, Robert and detectives have called in reporting a drone flying over the scenes they were securing or doing evidence collection at. They were intermittent, and we never hear followups, so we've kind of assumed its the same sicko, doing what we're doing, but closer to the action.
>>
were maxing out lads
>>
>>128545820
Fuck man
what til some sandnigger figures out how to put on bomb on one

Want to make a gazillion bucks,
come up with a drone whitenoise /jammer/immobilizer or something to that effect that people can buy and put in thier home
>>
>>128545970
It's possible.
>>
File: 1495866286388.jpg (2MB, 4320x2760px) Image search: [Google]
1495866286388.jpg
2MB, 4320x2760px
>>128545225
yeah, well I like yours a lot. keep up the good work
>>
>>128545733
Gotta be honest, I enjoyed it. It was actually the oversight shit that caused the alcoholism
>>
>>128546109
I wonder if he's doing it for the OC gore or for publicity like he has a youtube channel.
>>
File: CPD - A E S T H E T I C 15.gif (3MB, 3264x1836px) Image search: [Google]
CPD - A E S T H E T I C 15.gif
3MB, 3264x1836px
>>128546245
No idea, but I'm fucking intrigued.

>>128546164
Thanks, mane. I'll keep at it.
>>
>>128545744
its true, this is reality radio, its a chance to live in the moment
>>128545748
all those things contribute to the comfy atmosphere in this thread. who said gore couldn't bring people together?
>>
>Jonathon Bong and Tasha Washington
>3 shots fired on lawndale

need a new bread soon
>>
>>128546234
I could never be a cop in a big city
I would just shoot them
I wouldn't risk my life to capture some junkie alive
I feel sorry for beat cops, basically cleaning up society's trash and fixing problems created by politicians
>>
>>128546652
BAKING!
>>
>>128546910
>>128546910
>>128546910

NEW NEW NEW

>>128546910
>>128546910
>>128546910
>>
>>128546523
Does this look like Chicago license plates?

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=ADpPzytBSN4
>>
>>128546687
I got out before it got too bad, I was trained by the last of the old guys...we didn't shoot them, but we fucked with their heads a lot...they would rather be shot than made to look as dumb as they are
>>
>>128546127
>come up with a drone whitenoise /jammer/immobilizer or something to that effect that people can buy and put in thier home

Already exists, leafbro, and being used in Iraq.

http://makezine.com/2015/10/16/research-company-takes-aim-uavs-portable-anti-drone-rifle/

http://www.thefirearmblog.com/blog/2017/04/20/taiwanese-raysun-counter-drone-system-iraq/
>>
File: 1496285607743.gif (30KB, 450x600px) Image search: [Google]
1496285607743.gif
30KB, 450x600px
>>
>Biker gang making noise going back and forth
>3 or 4 people fighting in the alley
Thread posts: 318
Thread images: 89


[Boards: 3 / a / aco / adv / an / asp / b / bant / biz / c / can / cgl / ck / cm / co / cock / d / diy / e / fa / fap / fit / fitlit / g / gd / gif / h / hc / his / hm / hr / i / ic / int / jp / k / lgbt / lit / m / mlp / mlpol / mo / mtv / mu / n / news / o / out / outsoc / p / po / pol / qa / qst / r / r9k / s / s4s / sci / soc / sp / spa / t / tg / toy / trash / trv / tv / u / v / vg / vint / vip / vp / vr / w / wg / wsg / wsr / x / y] [Search | Top | Home]

I'm aware that Imgur.com will stop allowing adult images since 15th of May. I'm taking actions to backup as much data as possible.
Read more on this topic here - https://archived.moe/talk/thread/1694/


If you need a post removed click on it's [Report] button and follow the instruction.
DMCA Content Takedown via dmca.com
All images are hosted on imgur.com.
If you like this website please support us by donating with Bitcoins at 16mKtbZiwW52BLkibtCr8jUg2KVUMTxVQ5
All trademarks and copyrights on this page are owned by their respective parties.
Images uploaded are the responsibility of the Poster. Comments are owned by the Poster.
This is a 4chan archive - all of the content originated from that site.
This means that RandomArchive shows their content, archived.
If you need information for a Poster - contact them.