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You are currently reading a thread in /mu/ - Music

Thread replies: 313
Thread images: 46
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>>
https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=-1-np73rk1U

I think /mu/ is actually cool and not shitty
>>
https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=dMeZCPbM6bA

I'm scared I might have aids and all that's left for me is testing in one month
>>
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https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=YIMvM8u9C-o
Nothing really to get off my chest, kind of apathetic to any of my problems right now. Just finished reading Steppenwolf which was great.
>>
https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=24zRbtZYwmc

I am very unhappy and alone and it's really my own fault, but I don't see a way out now.
>>
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https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=rgKymMtqGDQ

i think this place is shit but you guys are the closest thing ive ever had to people who understand how i engage with the world, and i honestly appreciate the things that are said here bar shitposting.
>>
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https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=0nxK0WaBL24

I am not sure I love this girl but just letting her go feels like the biggest mistake of my life.
>>
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https://m.youtube.com/watch?v=4tvlJlwtWXs

I'm probably trans, but I've never acted on it. Really bothers me, 'cause I've had these feelings for a long-ass time.
>>
>>61838036
spent like two years thinking i was trans and it was the most agonizing time of my life arguably. hope ur feeling alright.
>>
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I'm an adult with real problems like recovering from a near fatal disease and getting my life together. I shouldn't be wasting time arguing with teenagers about music on 4chan.

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=R2F_hGwD26g
>>
https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=TOvZ8ln1riQ

It's gradually becoming more and more apparent to me of the incredible amount of things I've lost and missed the chance to have/to keep in my life that can be traced back as a result to my perfectionism.
>>
>>61838190
im like you in that i simply took myself far too seriously growing up, and i just didnt get things done because i was afraid of peoples perception of my being changed. watch this, it might help you

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=yYCz06bS380
>>
https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=yaTx9unXjLs

A boy I think I fell in love with from another state is visiting his boyfriend in my state, and he wants to see me but I don't think I have the emotional strength to see them together. His BF is a friend of mine so it would make it even harder for me.

Besides that I don't have anything to get off my chest, that's just been eating me up for the last few days.
>>
>>61838078
>>61838036
been feeling the same as both of you. It's been extremely hard over these past few months for me. Hope you folks are doing good

also
https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=rcjmdqfbb4g
>>
https://youtu.be/4BMZ7wfLyno

I fell for her too hard at a bad time. I'm going to sit here waiting for weeks or months waiting on her to make a decision. If she goes back to her ex, I know my depression will get worse. I can't forget the time we spent.
>>
https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=ufOE-i1BN7k

I rarely really talk to people because I always feel like I'm not expressing myself correctly. Now I have even started to ruin my education by barely writing anything down on exams etc.
>>
>>61838078
charli?
>>
>>61838446
hm? i dont know u if thats what youre wondering, its just that during my weird 15-18 being-neurotic-about-shit phase i thought that some of the feelings that were manifesting themselves then were because of a number of things, and that at one point i thought it was cos i was trans.
>>
it's not on youtube but i'm listening to the closing track on channel orange

long story made kinda short:
two days ago, my friend brought me along to the movies. i was in my car, playing Forrest Gump while casually singing along, as i show up at his house, where for some reason, everyone's chilling on the lawn. i quickly realize they probably heard me singing, and prepare to get out of the car and pretend like nothing ever happened, when one of the girls out of nowhere opens the back-door, gets in, reaches between the seats, grabs my arm and immediately says "no. stop what you're doing." i turn around and i'm met with the most beautiful smile i've ever seen. before i even have the time to freak out she goes: "are you fucking kidding me? i'm like on the verge of crying right now!" the other guys go inside the house, but her and i just remain inside the car, hearing the song through, before eventually going inside. by that point, her and i already knew what was going down. and of course, we end up sitting next to each other at the movie theater, completely ignoring the movie.

it's not even 48 hours later. my life has flipped upside-down completely. this is the cutest, most beautiful person i have ever met and the only thing i'm thinking of is how on earth any of this happened.
>>
>>61838504
Aah my bad. your story reminded me of someone I know quite alot.
>>
>>61838078
>>61838036
I kinda get these feelings too and I think I'm bisexual but somehow suppressing it. I also get hallucinations when I close my eyes (not the hypnagogic kind, trust me I know the difference) and they're sometimes entertaining but sometimes creepy as fuck and I get paranoid pretty easily and I'm worried about my mental health.

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=EfRgd9REzAs
>>
>>61838531
no joke lad that sounds to me like something that could go a really long way. i mean shit that's one of the most perfect introductions to a person i could possibly imagine.

you're a lucky guy my man, i hope it works out well for the both of you
>>
https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=ilOi4E0MCN0

I went out with a qt and some of her friends, I think they dislike me
>>
>>61838531
this is beautiful if true, dude, don't give her up. that's something out of a movie.
>>
https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=1S5h0nlE65I

not an ass man but damn
>>
https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=KECGY1W0uqM

Gf broke up with me a few weeks ago. Contacted her again to see how she was doing. Found out she's dating a guy already. Replied to me saying to go away and stop bothering her, or she'll call the police and tell her family. Past memories of our relationship are still present and I feel like I'm not overcoming.
>>
>>61838737
that's really shitty dude, i dont have anything to comfort you with I just gotta say im sorry for ya
>>
https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=fGDsGf1eAqE

I think I love her and everyday is a new experience in wanting to be dead
>>
>>61838737
>Replied to me saying to go away and stop bothering her, or she'll call the police and tell her family. Past memories of our relationship are still present and I feel like I'm not overcoming.

She probably wasn't the best person if she does that shit. Or its you being a creep. Anywhore, its good that you are not together anymore
>>
https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=1aokGEMTCWg

im going nowhere as a person
i have no motivation to do anything
people always asked me what i wanted to do and i never had an answer
still dwelling on stupid shit no one cares about from years ago
nothing in common with anyone around me
i feel like moving to america at age 8 ruined a lot of things
i 8 i didnt fit in, i never did, i never had much in common with anyone and i obviously wasnt self aware
i would piss my pants on purpose to just go home
the only friends i had just used me to make fun of me at any chance to look cool
video games and the internet were my parents and escape
the older ive gotten the less i cared about everything, as soon as i discovered sites like this one i became jaded
there might have been a chance to pull things together but now i just dont know i feel trapped
i have no one but my family who is getting old and sick so i cant really go anywhere else
the south of america might as well be hell
>>
>>61838766
No prob man. I guess it's matter of time until I feel better and stop thinking about her.
>>
>>61838807
>Or its you being a creep

I just contacted her once, and it was two days ago. But yeah, in a way it's the best thing not to be together anymore.
>>
>>61838531
good for you anon
>>
>>61838279
Thanks for that, just got done watching it.
>>
http://youtube.com/watch?v=haUJyCRTiXg
I'm trying to find ideas for my second album but I have none, I'm completely dry. I really can't think of any new ideas which sound good, and I feel terrible.
>>
https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=RoAJolzI5Ms

My roommate and I are finally gonna talk to our other roommate about all his bullshit. He doesn't take care of the kitchen. Just cooks and leaves everything out and lets the dishes just pile up. We don't even cook at home because of how disgusting. He's got an old, deaf dog that whines all the time and then pees all over the house. It's a tiny house we live in too and he decided to get a pool table that he doesn't even use and put it in the living room.

I fucking hate this guy.
>>
https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=7MC3pcbtOK8

I'm not sure if I'm suppressing my feelings or if I really don't care about living a completely disconnected life. I don't know how to get bored.
>>
>>61838078
Are you in washington?
>>
https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=pFFegMYbLRo

I think I might like someone who happens to be in a relationship.
Fuck why does this always ends up happening?
>>
>>61840434
no
>>
>>61838580
please go to a psychiatris, what you're experimenting it's pretty dangerous
>>
https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=TFkH9GruVHs

i hate myself so much it's hard to go on, i can't stop thinking about what everyone else thinks of me. I wish i had the guts to give up but i'm too afraid
>>
https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=6oz8rzrOEsk

I want to be left alone but I don't want to feel lonely. I'm worried I will never make a true best friend that I can talk about anything with again.

>pic unrelated but I also have the biggest crush on him and have recurring dreams of him and it hurts my heart
>>
https://m.youtube.com/watch?v=v3r-xMt9JmM

I really wish I could stop drinking but life is just too boring without it.
What do people who don't drink even do?
>>
>>61837817
https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=Ud-kI8TrpYw

I think I am finally starting to accept the fact that I will never be in a relationship. I feel hollow inside and hopeless, but I'm not that sad. Just upset that I will miss out on one of the most integral parts of life.
>>
https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=rCR0Tr2HTfA

I don't think I love my girlfriend anymore
>>
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>>61842365
>>61842473
I know those feels. I also have recurring dreams of someone I'll want forever who doesn't want me, it does hurt and it makes me feel like an obsessive creep
>>
https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=8NOhMsOgRmo

I have no desire to do anything, ever.
>>
https://soundcloud.com/radiohead/spectre

Im taking an excessive amount of time to get over a girl
>>
>>61838036 You're just mentally ill
>>
>>61843105
this so fucking much
>>
>>61837872
Faggot
>>
>>61838351
Faggots
>>
https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=Z2LHdWPutN4

I want to write a novel but I can't come up with more than a handful of actually original ideas.
>>
https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=7EgB__YratE

I have no friends, never had a girlfriend and each new day I feel more unhappy. I'm scared this will end in a depression because some days already have been so bad, I felt like only moving in slow motion and everything was exhausting. I feel like a friend/friends who accept (I have huge self-esteem issues and feel like everybody always looks down on me) and motivates me (to do some more outgoing stuff) would solve all of my problems. The past few weeks have been especially bad because I've met some people that I really like (and actually don't look down on me at all) but I have no idea how to build some sort of relationship or friendship with them since I never learnt how to do it. Everytime I get motivated to do something to start a friendship with somebody my plan gets crushed shortly before because then my brain starts thinking "you are boring as fuck, why would anybody want to hang out/talk with you?". I see no way out of my situation in the near future.
>>
https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=m0p474aGg0k

I have to take a piss but it's too much effort to get out of my computer chair (it's really not, I'm just a lazy ass).
>>
https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=ddDeYcVhEno

my big brother borrowed battlefield vietnam from his friend when i was a kid and i accidentally broke it, i then "lost" it. No one knows to this day,
>>
>>61842640
>What do people who don't drink even do?
Post on 4chan all day.
>>
https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=IrdRzunRwhE
I've been wanting to kill myself for the past three years now
>>
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https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=Ygfh6dFUtcU

I love this guy. We had a casual thing for a little bit but ended up breaking it off because he started fucking around with some slut at a halloween party and I was hurt and we talked and he wanted to stay casual while I wanted something more. Well I never got over him. A few nights ago I went over his place, ended up staying the night and sleeping together. And it was great. Not even the sex, just his company and being with him.

Well I know for a fact he's hooking up with his neighbor, we've fucking talked about it, and that was bugging me and I ended up kinda acting weird that night. He's still hooking up with her so I decided to have a talk with him and we decided that staying friends is probably the best course of action, considering how he's still scared of relationships.

I hate this. I can't get over him and him hooking up with some slut is definitely not helping my mental state. Fuck this shit.
>>
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>>61843105
>tfw literally will never have him
it's a soul-numbing feel.
>>
I have women hit on me all the time and I don't even care. I'm not even interested in sex or relationships anymore. I just want to be left alone.
https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=Cutc8Nmr8cI
>>
https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=rMezOwBpuh8

i think i'm starting to give up on everything
>>
https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=1rGUumnHg4Y

I'm ridiculously tempted to cheat on my girlfriend who lives two states away. Not like, have a second relationship, just hook up with someone else a couple of time.
I'm not going to, but I could do so very easily.
>>
https://youtu.be/E7UmjvbmHQM


My dad has cancer and I'm not really worried and that worries me.
>>
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https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=FqHTa561Ua0

I'm going to die by the time i'm 25 and none of my friends know.
>>
>>61845397
what of?
>>
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https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=6yEgcb167k4&ab_channel=MatteoVilla

ive never told my dad i love him
>>
Yob- marrow

I think about killing myself every day and have the means to do so. I only don't because I feel like my daughter would miss me. But I haven't seen her in Almost a yr now because her mother won't let me, so I think she has forgotten me and wouldn't even know. I find the sentence "yes he actually killed himself" repeating in my head constantly and sporadically. Like some sort of psychosis. I set a time limit for myself a long time ago and the date is approaching soon, and it scares the fuck out of me. Nothing's gotten better, and I made myself a deal
>>
>>61842473
how old are you anon?
you have a whole life to make new friends, they shouldn't all be from school or college
>>
>>61845530
Oh and inb4
>try harder fagot count your blessings
I am trying very hard to make things better and will continue to do so. Until my date where I have to make the decision
>>
>>61845530
being nothing is objectively worse than being what you are now. You are worth something, even if thats just a bit. you musn't give up on yourself or your daughter, you will be happy one day, and that is worth infinitely more than feeling bad now and gone forever
>>
>>61837895
>>61837951
>>61838036
>>61838190
>>61838436
>>61838737
>>61838833
>>61842473
>>61842720
>>61844136
>>61845530

So there's this website called 7cupsoftea, where you anonymously chat to people, they listen to you, and help you cope with what's troubling you. They don't try and fix you, they just listen to you, and it's incredibly rewarding to visit there once in a while. Please people, if you can write your feelings to a bunch of anonymous cunts, you can write your feelings to a stranger who will, for at least 1-3 hours, care about how you are feeling.

I hope you all go there, talk it out, and one day will be happy.
>>
https://youtu.be/ujqH2CUwyUY

Gf of two years went out with another guy to dinner because 'we were in a rough place.' She let me know nothing sexual happened and that she couldnt continue with the date because it wasn't me. Things were really great before I found out, but now whenever she goes to parties without me I worry somethings gonna go wrong. It seems like she's already moved on from our past troubles but it's hard for me to see past them. It just stinks now since we are best friends and definitely won't break up for a while, but she's way happier than me all the time, but we both are clinically depressed. Usually I'm better at coping with it than she is but now it's the opposite.
>>
https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=-KTsXHXMkJA

I want to die.
I wonder, since this is 4chan, will I be called
"HA HA GAAAAYYY!"
it's possible. It's possible.
>>
>>61845588
>>61845765
Thanks anons. I still have some time to try
>>
>>61842640
I really wish people would stop telling me I need to quit drinking.
>What do people who don't drink even do?
I wouldn't know.

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=MtxlDb9N6aE
>>
>>61846039
Get her pregnant dude. It will solve all these issues.
>>
https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=yHDVjmRvgmI
i think i have too much emotional baggage to grow close to anyone. i don't expect that to last forever though, i'm still young.
>>
https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=eNII9PDlFJ0

im tired of going out every weekend hooking up and getting wasted...i just want a girlfriend
>>
https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=TudLjZ_4VhU

just had sex with this girl a week after fucking her best friend.

I told both of them I love them even though they're 6/10s on a good day

met this 8/10 qt in a psych class who actually makes me feel something inside and I want to make her my gf
>>
>>61847522
shit bumps
>>
>>61847561
teddy?
>>
https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=QNO_D6TikFI

i've developed agoraphobia and bpd on top of my general anxiety and depression as a result of chemotherapy i went through two years ago and just kinda want everything to fucking end :^)
>>
Currently my favorite song is Bel-Air by Can

I'm massively depressed over a girl and more than anything I wish I had some Molly or Vyvanse right now
>>
>>61847963
go to the doctor

ask him for vyvanse

get vyvanse
>>
https://youtu.be/-u6DvRyyKGU

I CANNOT for the life of me stop watching porn, jerking off isn't the problem, but nothing I do seems to work :(
>>
>>61848059
Is it really that easy? No fucking way
>>
>>61843902
Dude who gives a fuck if it's original? Nothing is. Besides, just write even if it's just a shameless retelling of another story. I swear it'll help you improve your writing skills - and he'll you might come up with an original take on the story as you're writing it.
>>
>>61848149
I used to be obsessed with porn too. I still watch it sometimes but nowhere near as much and always just to get off as quick as I can. For me I think it was just that I became so immune to it that there was really no point in watching it anymore.
>>
>>61846148
I love you Anon. Please don't die <3
>>
>>61837872
Have you seen Rent?
>>
https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=E7CaTJ2SvG8

I am very worried about my future, and disappointed over my apathy and lack of discipline towards bettering myself.
>>
I love this thread.
>>
>>61848233
me: i cant pay attention

doctor: take these pills

ive been taking 70 mg pills for 4 years
>>
one of my favorite songs is joan of arc by melvins

and i am frustrated that i cant find any cool raves or sets to go to that arent filled with dudebros and guidos
>>
>>61849090
I specifically want vyvanse though. I've tried adderal, Ritalin, Xanax, and a whole bunch of other shit and it didn't do anything for me

But vyvanse, hooooooly shit it was amazing. All my anxiety and apathy was just gone. I wanted to take the world head on and do fun shit
>>
https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=i12PHJRJTVA&ab_channel=T3HUB3RSN1P3Z

I'm not sure if I am living the life I really want to be living right now but I don't feel like trying to change myself because most of the time I want to kill myself anyway
>>
Nature and Organisation - Tears for an Eastern Girl: https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=L3_ZINfdEPQ

I'm going to kill myself within the next couple months (my sister's pregnant, and I don't want the stress from my death to be a detriment to the baby) and am in general happier now that I've accepted it - I still feel kind of guilty when I think about my family's reaction though
>>
>>61838128
what disease?
>>
Siberian Breaks by MGMT
I think I am in love with this girl, despite her barely even knowing I exist . I tried so hard to get over her but I just cant. Also for some reason I feel like I am below everyone else. I just get in these fits of depression and wear a mask of humor and joy to prevent anyone from truly finding out who I am.
>>
https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=gocGlRuW1bw

The engineering school i'm in ( it doesn't work like in the US ) has slowly killed every interest i had in working in science, engineering and anything related to companies and business and i fear that it destroyed even the global interest i have in science and math.
I'm currently dropping out because it's ultimately boring and that i never got to work on something boring for an extended time. It's pretty ironic because the admission to those schools is after a selective ?contest ?exam over two years.
I have no idea of what i'm going to do in my future.
I'd kill myself if i had not my gf and my family and will do after a few months if i lose either, which will probably happen one day.
I have enough musical talent to make music but not enough to make it great or innovative.
I was a gifted child and i wasted most of it.
If my family had educated me to music and not only to science i'd be a great drummer, i'll still try to become one but i'm so late.
I know no one in the industry so i'll never get to live from anything related to music.
>>
https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=cRx0rqqTetc

I have two very good friends who are absolutely amazing, nothing short of encouraging and supportive to me. I'd talked to them for months on Facebook, but I only met them for the first time in real life at my birthday party in July 2015, and I haven't met up with either of them since. However, I'm deathly terrified that I won't be able to meet them again before September of this year, by which time we'll probably all have gone off to seperate universities. (I might possibly be going to the same university as one of them, but I really don't know for sure yet.)
>>
https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=ojBZsWKLk2U&ab_channel=ascampbell000

I'm dating a girl with depression but the fact that I also have depression makes me worried that we aren't compatible and possibly unable to have a healthy and supportive relationship despite the fact that I really like her a lot.
>>
>>61849204
vyvanse just makes me hate everybody
>>
https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=lHvsmwAYULo
I think I'm actually getting close to killing myself. Normally I'm too much of a pussy but the barrage of shit has pushed me closer than ever.
Thank you /mu/ for being there for me most of the time.
>>
>>61850380
I am a very depressed person and I dated an insecure girl with extreme anxiety and depression issues as well. We actually met inside a hospital

I became extremely dependant on her, and she basically used me to feel better about herself and her insecurities. When things inevitably didnt work and we broke things off, I was left destroyed and feeling worse than ever before, and she went and immediately found another guy to fill that hole.

If I was your friend I would be extremely against you dating this girl, just speaking from personal experience
>>
>>61850556
I forgot the picture I wanted to post.
>>
>>61850537
Vyvanse gets me so spun and focused that I don't talk to anyone
>>
>>61850537
>>61850583
Drugs work different for everyone

For me, vyvanse gives me tons of energy and confidence and it makes me want to go out and live my life and be productive and meet new people. However, if i'm sitting around doing nothing while on it I get super annoyed
>>
https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=rJjyqLAW6bg
I'm extremely worried that I'm not going to get into my top choice for college (don't worry, I'm 18), because my grades are utter shit. I'm really banking on my essay and SAT/ACT scores, but I'm not sure if it'll be enough.
>>
I care too much about what other people think about me and it's preventing me from doing what I really want to do

Also I think about killing myself every day


https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=0Ul7bqFguPg
>>
>>61850669
Im this guy>>61850583
I kind of agree with you, I like it too. But for some reason vyvanse was less "fun" for me and I just got hyper-focused and didn't talk to anyone like I would on adderall or the big bad amphetamine that I won't mention by name. But you're right, drugs work different for everyone
>>
https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=mrojrDCI02k

I wish I had an excuse to dress like a girl
>>
>>61851310
I wish I was a girl for a day so I can take pictures of myself in cute outfits so I can masturbate to when I turn into a guy again.
>>
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https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=9AUEjzVQwKo

I live with my best mate of 15 years and his girlfriend of 8 years, and I think she and I are slowly falling in love. Both of us would never act on it and those two will no doubt get married and she will get over it but I don't trust us getting drunk together anymore.
>>
>>61851431
After 8 years people naturally start to have waning interest in what used to be a fiery new relationship. It's only natural that she would start to fantasize about other guys after that amount of time. She probably sees her current BF as boring and regular and you as new, exciting, and exotic

Never tell your fucking mate about any of this, don't even consider it dude. It's best to let this shit stay buried
>>
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https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=KjAF7D4l91M

So this girl and I were basically inseparable for all of christmas break. Talking, texting, and even skyping for four hours; it was something out of a dream for me and I really thought we had something going. Fast forward to the start of the new semester and we barely say a word to each other and the texting has become far and few between. Not wanting to lose her I did the pleb thing and straight up asked her if she liked me and she went on this whole diatribe how she's fwb with my dorm neighbor. Now i'm stuck laying awake at night in the dorm lobby because she always spends the night next door and the walls are so thin I hear her voice and its haunting. So basically I'm stuck in a romantic Telltale Heart.
>>
>>61851601

Yeah that's the plan, even if they broke up I wouldn't get with her.

Also I've hung with this chick for like 8 years and lived with her about 4 years out of that, so I'm hardly new and exciting.
>>
>>61851624
>romantic Telltale Heart
Just chop her up and put her under the floorboards so you can get it over with, then.
>>
https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=XPgGjUSEWss

My friend has lung cancer that's metastasized in the bones and the doctors said his "safe zone" is until the end of February. I'm scared for him.
>>
>>61837817
https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=0wTxqHbJOzg
it's been 7 months and I'm still not over her, despite what i keep telling myself
>>
>>61851680
Then it would be a literal romantic telltale heart.
>>
>>61838078
Shit me too. Looking back I'm actually incredibly embarrassed though and wish I wouldn't have gone through that phase. But at the time I genuinely felt like I wanted to be a girl. All around weird year
>>
>>61851763
do you live on the east coast
>>
>>61851714
>My friend has lung cancer that's metastasized in the bones

My dad had exactly that too and spread his brain also, it was very painful the doctors said that the cancer in the bone in his pelvis was calcifying and leaving calcium deposits on the brain, my dad had 4 months from diagnosis.

Your friend has my sympathies anon, it's an emotional rollercoaster.
>>
>>61838504
yo i thought i was trans for a really long time too, came to terms that i was reflecting the culture i surrounded myself with and the queers and trans people i knew were actually fucking insane and mentally ill.

doing a lot better now i think.

you're not alone in this shit, people will probably try to invalidate you by saying that you're still trans or whatever but they're fucking psychos and you probably shouldn't listen to them.
>>
>>61851881
*bone in his pelvis was de-calcifying
>>
https://soundcloud.com/funkmammoth/the-ship-has-sailed?in=funkmammoth/sets/new-sea

I'm secretly very insecure about my height, and my weight even though I'm technically below the average BMI
>>
https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=AXXKCIefadw

I'm a lazy fuck in my first year of college, with no job and no idea of what I want my career to be. I hate being alone so much, but the funny thing is I'm too lazy to do anything but stay at home, and I've always had trouble talking with people so I feel out of place. Sometimes I feel like taking a break from college so I can figure out what I want to do with myself.
>>
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okkervil river- king and queen

there is a chance im responsible for my dogs early death. she was all i had and there is a chance i killed her.
>>
https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=yEG2VTHS9yg

I'm insecure about my taste in music despite most people I know being top 40 listeners.
>>
>>61851721
https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=0l0nzPpvbFs
Heres another one bud, hang in there.
>>
>>61851939


https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=lahE0Igv49k

despite not really being ugly (i hope) ive never been in a romantic relationship with anyone ever
>>
>>61851721
Woman are worst drug dude, the withdrawal hits the hardest. Here's a track that has always helped me.

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=DfC2iovCzu4
>>
>>61852076
*the worst drug
>>
https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=WF-yna4IRIg

I have a box with a gun I don't even know how to use, locked by 7 locks. Every day that I would normally just snap and go postal, I turn a key. Every time something unbelievably good happens, I lock a key back. I'm currently 2 keys off from opening it.

I don't know if I'll kill myself, go on a spree, or pussy out and put it back; either way, it's nice to have.
>>
>>61851721
It's been about three years for mine. I know how you feel.
>>
Do you remember walter

ever since i was 14 ive suspected that i may have klinefelters but ive never had the balls to go find out.
>>
https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=ShdX3tkflFE
I love this whole album
I've began to realize that I have no idea what I'm doing with my life. I have lots of trouble talking to people and have no friends that I can talk to about personal things.
>>
https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=b0iKZ7BNZPo
i have no idea what i actually look like.i can't help but feel i'm terribly uly and malformed, but then i have people that say im qt. i don't know anymore. i feel like i've lost my grip on reality. i can't tell whats hyperbole or actuality when i look in the mirror. i don't know how to feel anymore. i had a guy say he'd fuck me today, and i didn't know how to respond properly.i just don't understand why anyone would find me attractive in any manner. i'm going mad and i can't tell if my telusions are just related do my own horrid visage, or if i see everything distorted.
in short: i'm just a fucking delusional loser.
>>61849294
>>61851624
you guys picked some of my favorite songs already, and iktf that you guys posted.
>>
https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=IW_qMLnbRJw
I wish I had good friends.
>>
https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=p3G5IXn0K7A

My life is awesome.
>>
>>61851971
if this is your favorite song then i would really like your taste
>>
https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=Q8UNecNMM50
I love a girl name Evangeline, but I may never see her again.

I always felt alone. I just never really cared until I spoke to her again, after 6 of the worst years of my life. That's when I realized just how important loving someone really is. Funnily enough, thinking of her those 6 years often kept me from killing myself...
>>
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>>61837817
Robbie Basho - Song of the Snowy Ranges https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=IaWgs7aZsPE

R, I don't want to love you anymore. As a friend, sure, but as boyfriend material, you're far from ideal, and not even close to good. Work on your fucking issues, man, don't just admit they're there. I'll always, ALWAYS be your friend, but stop dragging me along this way. I'm not one of the fuckbuddies and users you call friends, I'm more than that and everyone knows it.

guh
>>
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>>61837817
I haven't drawn in over a month and I don't think I have the motivation to start again.

I have dreams and I don't have the guts to not be a failure. I lack self control and I wish I was stronger, wiser, better.

I'm screwing myself over and I don't know why.

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=LmXz9I0zI5w
>>
>>61851964
okkervil river are dope

if you want to talk about it im curious, if not that's cool

sorry for your lose, dogs are bros.
>>
I came back from college and really needed to see my best friends from high school because I don't know what I want to do but we had grown so apart that it was like talking to a completely different person. They used to be the only people I understood but know I don't know. I blame myself because I put them on a pedestal in my mind and my social skill have completely deteriorated over the last semester because all I do is post on /mu/ and watch tv on my laptop in my room

this whole album is one of my favs. Thanks mac demarco for bringing it to my attention!
https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=bKYHRpQWUwU
>>
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>>61853037
Things like that happen, anon. People drift apart.

It's part of growing up.

I don't know your situation with them but sometimes the best choice is to let go of them.
>>
>>61852076
This is a great song, thanks.
>>
https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=nH1OZe98J5U

I really fucking hate Kid A. I like OK Computer, but I don't like Kid A after the first song.
>>
https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=nva9XwhaBMs

There is literally no one on the planet I feel comfortable talking about my feelings with/ having a deeper conversation than "how was your day"
>>
>>61852994
she was almost three. its just a dog in the end but when things felt like shit even if its coincidence shes seemed to know. she was the only one that greeted me when i got home as there is nobody else. id see her looking at me in the window everytime i got home.

ive had some mental issues. left my meds on the table, where i thought they were out of her reach. alls fine until in the afternoon she suddenly falls over unable to walk and starts making this yelping/screaming sound. i panick and drive her to the emeregency clinic but she was already almost dead when i got there. only after i got home i realized i dont remmeber the exact amount of pills i left on the table and there is a chance she ate one of them and died of it.

sorry for blog post
>>
>>61853182
Well, you told us that, anon.

So you're not entirely hopeless.
>>
>>61840391

I never get bored either anon, I think we might be lucky or something.
>>
https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=kMKiLXl5Ixc

I think I'm starting to hate my best friend out of pure spite. When we first met in high school he was the home schooled kid who didn't have any friends until we both found out about or shared interests. I was his only friend. Immediately after high school I had already had a job, steady relationship, and comfortable housing situation while he dropout out, was single, and still living at home. After about a year or so I had gotten laid off while he had just gotten a job in a similar field but better paying and based off commission. After losing my job and running through savings eventually I had to move back into my parent's place, which severely strained my relationship with my girlfriend. At the same time, my friend had used all the money he was making to get a new place and was starting to date for the first time in his life. My girlfriend eventually broke up with me and I haven't been very social at all since. I always see my friend post pictures on social media out at bars with his co-worker and new friends having a great time. His social circle keeps getting bigger and mines smaller. I genuinely feel good that he's really successful and more outgoing/social than when I first met him, but I rarely ever meet with him irl anymore because I just get filled with immense jealously whenever I see his face. Sometimes I just wish I were dead.
>>
>>61853329
Use connections at goings-out with him to land a job with your work experience.
Climb back to success and I doubt you'll start straining your relationship.
>>
>>61853329
Maybe try talking to him about it? If nothing else maybe try to get a new job or just hang around different places to see where you're comfortable. Also you shouldn't let where he he is put you down, try to climb back up.
>>
>>61853224

>its just a dog in the end

dogs are important to all of us. my dog is something I love more than most people in my family :P

> i dont remember the exact amount of pills i left on the table and there is a chance she ate one of them and died of it.

im no therapist, and this might sound cliche as fuck, but what does it matter? you assigning blame is only harming yourself, when you're already hurting. there's no way for you to ever know whether or not your dog ate the pills causing her to be sick. it might sound corny as fuck, but instead of trying to fruitlessly assign blame you could remember the amazing times you had with your dog and what makes you love her.

>sorry for blog post

hey man, I asked :P
>>
>>61853235
Anonymous imageboard vs. Real life peopl is the distinction to make here I suppose..
>>
>>61838531
this may be because I'm coming down but I can't comprehend this post
>>
>>61851895
my neurotic bouncing back-and-forth came really only from me rather than other people but thanks.
>>
https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=eodoPTlVhU4

i just had to kick my best friend out of my house because he couldnt pay rent or bills for the past month and a half and set me back a pretty penny because i had to cover him. He turned out be kind of a manipulative sociopath and it makes me sad.
>>
https://m.youtube.com/watch?v=A1wzBI6EKxk

Guys..Will I ever be with a sexy female ever again? I was a lucky guy (for you) and have hooke up with some of the sexiest chicks I've ever laid eyes on. I don't think it will happen again though, I just drink my pain into submission these days......
Someone hold me pls
>>
>>61845292
damn son
>>
>>61853788
Get motivated. Improve yourself. Bang sexys.
>>
>>61845765
you're a good person
>>
https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=DvzOfm0ZhS8
I don't know what im doing after highschool. I don't have a car, job, or even a license. I might just say fuck it and go into the army. Would have to lose weight though. I simply haven't planned my life right.
>>
>>61853037
DUDE THIS ALBUM IS SO GOOD HOLY SHIT THANK YOU
>>
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https://youtu.be/zvz8jtZ3f5s

I think I'm becoming an alcoholic. I've been drinking almost everyday since my ex gf left me. When I dont drink (when I dont have any money to buy booze) I cry all night. And when I drink I feel worse when I wake up with a terrible hangover. I just wanted to forget her but I still love her with all my heart.

Sorry for my poor english.
>>
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http://youtu.be/CBC1h2D9rgw
I've thought about her every night before bed for the past year or so. I feel that i could get with her but I'm scared that deep down i like her too much too just have a friends with benefits situation going on. the only thing is that the commitment of a relationship terrifies me. it doesn't help that she's my best friends sister either
>>
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https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=bUrkjpPVakg

I got my first even compliment for a girl yesterday. it was on a younow stream and i guested for like 10 seconds and after i quit she smiled and said "..you're pretty cute anon, hit me up after this" it was infront of like 100 people. it felt really good, even though i was super embarrassed and made a fool of myself

she's a pretty famous youtuber with around 80,000 subs
>>
>>61853847
It's not that simple bro. Im kinda ugly and just got lucky. I think I kinda just have this aura that attracts people but that only goes so far outside of your early 20's (which Im about to be leaving) oh well at least I have the memories. Thanks for trying anon :)
>>
>>61853955
I am an alcoholic anon. Sorry I don't really know an escape route. So do your best to get out I guess is the only advice I have. Start exercising or something
>>
>>61843089
Anon, I was in your shoes a few months ago. You have to break it off.
>>
>>61852941
I feel the same way but with music and writing. I hope you succeed man
>>
>>61837872
>tfw I've had unprotected sex but I'm terrified of taking a test
>>
the loneliness is so unbearable and i actually play video games just to talk to other people.
>>
https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=76fdmyynIo8 (not my fav but i can't decide rn. this is my fav band)

i don't deserve any of the people around me. they're all selfless and kind and i'm selfish, lazy, stupid, and untalented. i am not cut out for living and i feel like i'm losing my mind. i am pathetic

>>61838531
this is some Eternal Sunshine For The Spotless Mind shit. please do not lose her.

>>61838782
i feel u man

>>61845765
luv u

>>61852693
nobody with such good taste in music deserves to feel like this. hang in there, dude

>>61853914
word i feel you man
>>
https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=6bfTTeZOrs4

I feel like the few girls I've hooked up with are just people I've tricked into believing I'm interesting. Still a virgin and my happiness is completely contingent upon when I finally lose it. I would have hooked up with a beautiful girl months ago but I couldn't even get it up for my first time. Now it might be over and it's gonna be hard to I've with myself.
>>
https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=oW_7XBrDBAA

I got nothing to get off
>>
>>61854204
>taking sex this serious

cmon man. lighten up
>>
>>61853947
No problem, Van Dyke Parks was a session musician with the Beach Boys and a ton of other popular musicians. He's really cool
>>
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I broke up with my girlfriend and moved across the country for graduate school. I've contacted student organizations but they haven't written me back, and I'm just feeling really lonely. I haven't talked to anyone my age irl in three weeks.

Also I'm cutting weight and my lifts are going to shit because of it

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=vKFjD28qPwQ
>>
>>61853124
thank you a lot, this is exactly what I needed to hear
>>
>>61852941
I know that feel exactly anon.

I don't know about your exact situation, so all I can recommend to you is that friends help. If I hadn't met this amateur filmmaker at an internship I went to I would have given up on pursuing a screenwriting career. Just keep looking anon, there will be someone out there that can support your ideas and goals. Making it alone is fucking hard.

Here's a nice song:
https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=qN0bTBt8oKs
>>
Gravity Rides Everything

I hate college because of the forced social interactions.
>>
>>61854261
yeah this, m8
I'm 22 and for the longest time i thought i was fucked up because i didnt feel like having sex with anyone yet i thought i was still a loser and that having sex was some crazy ass stepping stone into adulthood
I just recently lost my virginity to a girl i really like (maybe love) and she treated me with so much respect and care. it ended up being awesome but it also didn't feel like i was any more of an adult than i already was. I realized you can grow up and do anything you want whether or not you have sex a bunch of times or with a bunch of people. It really felt natural.
sorry for the long post, but this one kinda hit home
>>
>>61854376
they don't have to be forced. go to things that interest you and dont go to things that dont. you will meet likeminded people along the way.
>>
>>61854096
I drink to forget about her and our past. I drink to be in peace with myself you know? When I sober I only think about her and I dont get motivation to do anything. At least I do somethings when I'm drunk, like listen to music and eat.

But thanks for the attention.
>>
http://youtu.be/rn-wrPf5Ls0

I hate everyone I am forced to be in contact with
>>
Wait - Beatles

God's a dick,
>>
Souls of Mischief - 93 til Infinity

Sophomore in college. I'm still a virgin because on the 5 separate occasions I've convinced a girl to sleep with me but I've been too drunk / nervous to get it up. I've ate out the girl on each occasion.
>>
https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=j0naRFSK2hQ

Over the past couple years I realized that I'm not cis, but the thing is I don't know what I am. I mean, I /think/ I'm genderfluid, but that might imply that my gender seems to change frequently, which it doesn't, It's just that there are long periods of time where I hate my body and wishing I didn't have it, and maybe like a day-long period where I'm comfortable in my own body. So long story short, I don't know what the fuck I am anymore.

Also, I've been wanting to hang myself for the last year now, but there's nowhere in my apartment to do it from.
>>
>>61854485
i didn't lose my virginity until senior year of college. it truly doesnt matter. it helps to not pursue women in the hopes of sex. meet women that you like, take them on dates and shit. if you act like yourself, the ones that mean anything will take notice and like you. then it doesnt matter if you're a virgin. if they turn you away because you're a virgin, then they suck. who fuckin needs em.
>>
https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=6GFM6B0oQ8M

I cry in my sleep a lot
>>
>>61854577
haha so do i.

is it a bad thing?
>>
>>61854577
its ok because you got dubs and you are a patrician
>>
>>61851310
I feel u, anon.
>>
>>61837817
https://m.youtube.com/watch?v=DWaB4PXCwFU

Have a crush on my friends ex gf and I feel like shit about it
>>
https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=S7zHZrcHdxg
I'm sorry I didn't make things work Laura. I'll always care for you.
>>
>>61854603
nah, it's cleansing is what yahoo answers said
>>
https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=KEeFNvvR-ng

There's a friend of mine I met a couple years back. We got along pretty well for the first year we met. Then during the second year, it came to light that they were severely mentally ill, Borderline Personality Disorder, Disassociative Personality Disorder, Depression, there was a lot on their plate. I always tried my best to be there for them, we talked a lot, and they trusted me. Time went by, and I hadn't seen them in a while, and so I talked to them, but they seemed pretty eager to not talk to me, and then one day, I was hanging out with them and a mutual friend, and all of the sudden they had a nervous breakdown. My friend calmed them down and we went home.

I asked my other friend about a week later if they were just generally uncomfortable around me. She said yes. Ever since then, I haven't talked to them or seen them around since. Ever since then, I keep thinking that this is probably my fault, and that I did something wrong to make them uncomfortable around me, and I've been feeling extremely guilty ever since.

I haven't talked to them in almost half a year now. It's probably for their own good. I don't even care if they hate me at this point, I just want them to be okay.
>>
>>61854173
you got some good taste too senpai. iktf too. i've been holding on for years with this shit, but it's getting worse so it's time for new shit to distract lol. i'll be fine though.
>>61854510
you are me from like 3 years ago. well, you're probably older than that, but anyway, do some more resaerch desu. if you go down my path of repression and get swole bruh,t hen you'll end up with my fuckin feels. (even though you prbobaly have the shit too right now) anywho, just research and order blockers if you got a dick senpai. worst thing that'll happen is you realize that it's something else and o off em.
t. tranny
>>
https://youtu.be/HSH--SJKVQQ

I'm going to kill myself in 1 week from today. I lost someone I couldn't live without. I hear her calling my name sometimes and I feel it's time to join her.
>>
>>61845512
Tell him

I don't care how much of an asshole or douche or fuckface he is.
Tell him.
>>
>>61855139
think about your mother when she finds out anon. it's not worth it. we are all going to die eventually, let time do it's thing.
>>
https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=R8OOWcsFj0U

This song reminds me of all the good times we used to have back then before everything came crashing down and you decided to move on again. I'm so mad that you decided to make me believe this mirage you put up, acting like you wanted to be in my life again when really I was just your escape from something that had nothing to do with me. I really wish we could have started again but I know it won't happen. You're somewhere out there, having fun with whoever it is that you're with and I hope you understand the hurt you caused me. I just wish you nothing but the best and I wish you happiness even though you don't think the same for me.
>>
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https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=q78ppqlOl1U

I think I'm finally starting to accept that I'm a fucking weirdo that loves fat girls. That counts as a small victory I guess.
>>
>>61852124
dude...

throw away the box
>>
>>61855189
I wouldn't do this if I had family to live for still. It doesn't really matter anyway - I'm not too broken up about it. This is what I want and I've given myself a good amount of time to prepare.
>>
>>61855286
read some Epicurus and Plato, not even joking.
>>
when i text a girl and they don't text me back immediately, it always freaks me out and i can't help it. i get too emotionally involved in small things

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=Agl1TgVfls0
>>
>>61855392
Why?
>>
https://youtu.be/8CTteaYXiUU

https://m.youtube.com/watch?v=lL2ZwXj1tXM

I just got out of a 3 year relationship with the love of my life because she couldn't stop drinking. I gave her everything in the world to watch her piss it all the fuck away
>>
>>61855427
>Why?

why not? it might interest you.
>>
>>61855517
I guess.
>>
>>61855548
Alright, if you're really set on killing yourself goodbye. it sucks to hear but it honestly seems like you're pretty set.
>>
https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=LuYNidNgQic

I think my partner of ~10 months is more into me than I am him, and while I love him, I hope he does manage to get a job overseas because I'm afraid to get too attached to him as part of me doubts I'm going to be satisfied in the long run
>>
>>61842640
I drink lots of coffee. I drink so much coffee that I'm wired all day every day.

Quitting drinking alcohol isn't very hard if you've got interesting shit going on or can enjoy your sobriety.
>>
>>61855578
I think the thing I'm most concerned about is where to do it at. I don't want to do it in my house - might spook whoever lives there next.
>>
>>61855548
What's your favorite game?
Play it.

What's your favorite artist?
Wait for that next album.

What's your favorite TV show?
Watch it.

What subjects interest you?
learn about them.

That's how I've coped with loss. I make myself busy and all the pain disappears. Life only has meaning if you give it one, so do that. You might find that your future will get pretty god-damn interesting if you set out to do that.
>>
>>61855648
you're whole outlook on life doesn't make sense. why do you care about that? saying you've lost all hope yet you are worried about "spooking" whoever lives their next?

you really don't want to do this. you're just depressed and dissatisfied with your current life
>>
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>>61853182
Hey anon I actually really liked that song OMG!!!
I really like this band called the Pixies.
Have you heard of them?
>>
>>61855644
Same dude from >>61855694
Have a song. https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=pXHTgeP4uKo
>>
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https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=Tgcc5V9Hu3g

My girlfriend (of three years) and I broke up about five months ago because I was "too depressive of a person" because my Dad was dying around the time -- and now I'm watching as she's slowly starting to fuck my friends and acquaintances. I've liked the same girl since I was still dating my ex, and I think she likes me too, and I imagine singing this song while holding her, high on opiates. Let's die, /mu/.
>>
>>61855714
I'm already set on this - there's really no changing it. I figure it would be more polite to not do it in my house. I'm looking at this more as a journey than just a death. I'm going to see the woman I love again soon. That's why I'm doing this.
>>
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>>61855779
>I'm going to see the woman I love again soon
you're not going to see anyone again soon
>>
>>61852124
>go on a spree
Why cause pain?
>>
>>61855807
We'll see.
>>
>>61837817
https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=j7xAeRpsmCo

I'll always love you Sharlene, even though we'll never be together. ;-;
>>
>>61855779
what are you doing with you're money anon

j-just asking.. for a friend
>>
>>61855779
Dude... There is no afterlife, you gotta accept that now and just live for the moment.

Even if we say there is an afterlife, almost all religions say killing yourself is a sin and you'll go to hell for eternity
>>
>>61855740
Thanks. That's a pretty song.

Either way to all you anons talking about drinking problems, you have to find something that interests you. I guarantee you something does. If you can't think of anything, start searching. I started getting back into drumming and writing in a journal.
>>
>>61855779
Well then, I'll just say this:
I've felt the same way, though the woman I love is still alive. I understand you now, somehow more than people I know.

I love her more than I do myself, and I'm sure you feel the same way. I wouldn't want her to kill herself if I die before her. Then again, I don't believe in an afterlife, so I just see it as throwing her life away.

What did she like to do, when she was alive?
>>
>>61855740
No I get that Im >>61842640 that poster
I know the future is going to get very interesting (more interesting than you guys are even ready for imo)

But still I just hold too much pain within me to stop drinking. Some days I don't even feel like drinking but Im into the habit of not giving a fuck.
I wish I still enjoyed cannabis because that's much better for you
>>
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https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=1SyneLPCxeI

The only reason I started going to college, working out, and eating right was to impress some girl I work with. She won't give me(or really anyone I work with) the time of day. I can;t really figure out why I am keeping this up she is like a 6/10 at best, but I still keep at it.
>>
>>61855894
Just ask her out for a drink or two (maybe even at your place know what I mean ayy lmao)
If it's gonna happen it's gonna happen. If it's not it's not. That's just my opinion
>>
>>61855894
Sometimes the heart wants what it wants anon, try acting on it - talk to her, try asking her out...what harm could it do? Just be confident
>>
>>61837960
There's plenty of fish out there anon
>>
>>61855859
Already gave most of it to charity, sorry.

>>61855863
Well, like I said, we'll see.

>>61855889
Her and I spent a lot of time goofing around, singing songs, playing guitars. We went on a road trip after senior year of high school for about a year. It was the best thing that ever happened to us. We both were very spiritual and tended to think about stuff like death a lot. The reason she killed herself, I assume, is because she was cut off of the antidepressants she'd been on for a while, and didn't have anyone to help her. She's always been kind of unstable, and so have I, to be fair. But I heard her calling me, asking me to come with her. So I am. Whether it was real or not doesn't concern me. Whatever happens, happens.
>>
>>61852816
It's one of them right now. I go through a lot of different kinds of music.
>>
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>>61856002
>Well, like I said, we'll see.

You'll be seeing nothing lmao
>>
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>>61855772
I'm so sorry bro, it'll get better. I promise. :c
>>
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>>61856002
you're going to die eventually. i think she can wait,
>>
>>61855894
bullshit dude, you do all that hard work for yourself, and you cant bother to get out of your comfort zone and ask her out, jesus christ fuck you and all your excuses, just do it dont keep waiting for the "right moment" fuck,
>>
>>61856002
Play her a song then. Godspeed, sir.

I'm going to contact my girl myself, on my birthday next month. Those two weeks we talked, back in 2014, those were my happiest days. I want to play her this song >>61855740.

Goodbye, I guess.
>>
https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=F5hhFMSAuf4

I think I might be bisexual, but I don't want to have sex with either gender. I keep getting pressured to get into a relationship or have sex by my friends, but the idea sounds like a waste of time and energy.
>>
>>61856083
Well I've given myself a week to see if anything happens that might change my mind. But I'm pretty keen on it.

>>61856033
Alright.

>>61856102
See you.
>>
well..theres this girl i work with, already confessed my feelings for her and asked her out, she has a bf tho, she still plays with me which is what i dont get, doesnt she know my feelings will keep getting the best of me? anyways shes pretty and has a personallity, it sucks seeing that everyday...

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=32M_6HwORcE
>>
>>61855894
This album is god tier.
>>
>>61854563
>if they turn you away because you're a virgin, then they suck. who fuckin needs em.
This. Holy shit, this. I can understand if women would be a little concerned if I was a virgin at my age, but if that's a total deal breaker for her with guys without even hearing them out about their particular circumstances and how they got there, etc, that shows a level of vanity and superficiality that you do not need in your life. You don't need it. It can hurt like a motherfucker I'm sure, but it only does you a favor in the long run of not spending too much time with women like that.

I've got a hint for you. If you're in your early 20s and you're still a virgin, most women won't care. Not enough for that to be a deal breaker anyway. Some even think it's cute and get off at the idea of popping your cherry. That's something you should be excited about.
>>
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https://youtu.be/BTFD5DZwK7g

I dont want to crave a girlfriend anymore
My crave is what's stopping me from properly talking to girls. I just want to ignore the lust and focus on anything other than women
>Inb4 turn homo
>>
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>>61856238
go gay
>>
>>61856110
you sound like your smarter and more thoughtful then your "friends"
dont be pressured into relationships, its better when it naturally flows when you like someone and things build up, i'd say

then again do whatver you want or ppl tell you to do.
>>
https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=F5mGYiLSYiI

I don't like my gf anymore and it has been like this for like a year now, also i want to fuck a girl i met last year and i know she wants too
>>
>>61856238
1) step one convince yourself you are a lady killer
2) get other people to believe you are a lady killer through lies
3) you are a lady killer
4) kill ladies
>>
>>61855977
I try talking to her when I see her. She blows me off or gives me 1-3 word answers every time. I know she doesn't like me already and have somewhat come to terms with that. I just guess I keep going because of what >>61856092 said. I am at this point doing it for myself.
>>
>>61856535
If she doesn't like you already, there is nothing you can do about it. Even girls who do like you will reject you sometimes. It's a shitty situation.
>>
>>61856313
Sounds like you know the answer brah. Clean break with cha girl first, though. Don't be that guy.


https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=wBJUmp3b2hU

I just need to get my drunk ass of /mu/ and finish writing. Imma do that now. piece

of

chickensz
>>
>>61851939
me too anon i feel you
>>
>>61851939
whats your height? 5'4 here
>>
GY!BE - Rockets fall on Rocket Falls

I'm 26 this year and enjoy my singleness and casual dating for a couple months here, a couple months there. I'm terrified of committing to something long-term. Of course, I never tell this to females.
>>
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>>61856535
Nigga Imma tell you some shit. I had a client and she was super cute, like you look at your niggas and be like "I wanna cuddle her, straight up," and they just nod, cause they want to too. I wasn't gonna fuck with that though, because she's a client and I'm a PROFESSIONAL.

Welp, last day together, I'm changing companies, we discuss business like always, but she's getting more personal, talking about her dreams and her ex-fiancee, family, everything. I keep it going, not even thinking that she's hinting. When she steps out to the car, though, my boss is all "You're a fucking fool if you don't ask her out." So I did.

She said yes. Absolutely. I called her a few days later, we talked like we had known each other forever. I set a date at the Indian restaurant in town. She had been there before. She loved it.

Shit is perfect.

The day before the date, I get a text from her. As soon as I saw her name, I knew it couldn't be good. "I'm sorry, but I will have to pass on the dinner. You didn't do anything wrong. I'm sorry."

Of course, the first thing I go over is "what the fuck did I do wrong?" I send her a text telling her that it's no problem, and if she ever changes her mind, just let me know. I knew it wasn't gonna happen, but again, I'm a fucking smooth operator, Sade style. It's a bitch of a game when you make all the right moves and still lose.

Shit happens and it's life, little nigga. Just keep pushing on. Telling you that it gets better doesn't do anything for you right now, so I won't do that. But I will tell you to keep moving.
>>
>>61856733
5'4 here as well.

To >>61851939 anon.
I learned how to deal with my height by feeling capable about things.

Learn to lift, play, hunt, provide for yourself. anything to make you feel like you do the right things if things go wrong. Your height won't get in the way of any of that.
>>
>>61856833
For real dude. I've had so many exchanges that seemed to go so right and then have it fade into nothing. Having said that, I've never regretted that outcome. You know what I do regret? Missed opportunities. It's so much better to know, for better or for worse, than to wonder what could have been.
>>
https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=-mmlngGRs3U

I've no intention of ever telling my parents I'm gay because my Dad will be crushed and hate me.
I also think I probs have an addictive personality because my drinking and smoking habits are getting much worse but I can't bring myself to do anything about it.
>>
https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=Tq1zVJZMclU

Got an embarrassing fetish called autogynephilia that I've had for as long as I can remember, I didn't acquire it from the internet. The problem is that it is literally the only thing that turns me on, no matter what I try. I have no desire to act on the fetish or because I know how ridiculous I'd look, and I have no interest in sex with other people. A naked woman makes me feel nothing, all of my sexual desires are directed entirely inwards despite still being able to fall in love with girls, which means any relationship I end up in will either culminate with me telling them about the fetish or me just refusing sex (which I imagine would be a deal breaker for most relationships). Because of all this I've decided to stop pursuing girls altogether. It's been 5 years since I had a gf, my friends all think I'm weird and probably gay because of it, and I think it's time for me to stop pretending I don't feel a bit lonely.

I didn't ask for any of this.
>>
I can't get off heroin despite trying to go clean 3 times now. My friends and family all believe I've finally gone clean, but I just recently started using again and I don't want to ask for help because everyone will lose trust in me.

http://youtu.be/RnBH3vsRjco
>>
>>61857134
asking for help now is better than them inevitably finding out later
>>
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>>61857134
I have those /can'tgetoffopiates/ feels, as well, anon. I curse the beautiful, numbing euphoria that keeps me, and I get locked in thoughts of thinking that I won't ever be happy without them. It's fucked. I associate way too many memories with opiates, and even feel like I can't do certain tasks without them.

Stay away from opiates of any kind, /mu/.
>>
https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=-6e5vnJcRYo
I'm afraid I'm never going to be able to get a girlfriend.
Which means it's even less likely that I'll ever get married and have kids. My friends wonder what's wrong with me because I'm still a virgin. I think there's a real possibility that I'll be alone for the rest of my life.

>>61857134
Sometimes it takes 4 times, sometimes more. Tell them now so you can get some help. You are not a failure.
>>
>>61857019
Im too drunk to look this fetish up.
Could you explain if you don't mind?
>>
https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=oUfW0Tex1G0

Feeling very confused because a girl i've been chasing for weeks is giving me mixed signals, she wants to go on a date but doesn't show any affection
>>
>>61857552
Turned on by imagining oneself as a woman. It's hard to explain and I have no idea how it started. I'm not trans and I don't experience dysphoria of any kind from being a man, I quite like it, but for some reason the idea of being (or preferably, being turned into) a female gets me going.

At least my fetish isn't illegal I guess.
>>
>>61857614
>At least my fetish isn't illegal I guess.
No, just impossible. Have you tried roleplaying?
>>
>>61856833
>>61856901
This. For the guys here who are fumbling over whether or not they should talk to a woman that they know, just keep in mind that time and time again men say their biggest regrets in life were the times they didn't take an opportunity when they had it and all the time they wasted "waiting for the right moment." Every bit of that is true.

Getting rejected hurts, but only about a tenth as much as never asking and wondering what might have been for the next several years. At least with rejection there's closure.
>>
>>61857473
>My friends wonder what's wrong with me because I'm still a virgin. I think there's a real possibility that I'll be alone for the rest of my life.
Man, was I there. I was there and it was awful. Fortunately most people find out eventually that they were worrying over nothing.
>>
>>61857690
I'm not interested in getting to know anyone else that's into this to be honest. I can't help what I'm turned on by but I still understand the reality of it, if I ever find myself roleplaying with men in dresses on internet forums to jack off that's a sign to kill myself.

I don't act on any of this stuff by the way, I have no desire for even occasional cross dressing.
>>
>>61857745
I have a feeling you live in a somewhat rual area...I may be wrong though
You shouldn't be ashamed though....I'm a mostly straight up straight guy but I've been almost/kind of attracted to sexually attracted to males I had a deep emotional connection with
If you live in a city it's possible you could find someone who understands you
>>
https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=vFHC8hnTqHQ

I've wasted my talents for the last 10 years on commitments that have seemingly gone nowhere.
>>
>>61857800
I can see why you think I'm some offshoot of the gay homophobe in denial cliche or something but I'd be fine with it if I was gay. What with my lack of sexual attraction to men and women I judge their aesthetics pretty equally, I can admit a guy is hot etc

I live in a city, I'm just not sure I even want to find someone who knows that about me, I could never think of us as on equal footing if someone knew that. I'd rather go around saying I was asexual (and in the sense that I'm not sexually attracted to any men or woman, I guess I am) and look for an asexual gf or something.
>>
https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=478qwzcJtlM

I'm too much of a coward to kill myself.
>>
>>61853726
me too m8
>>
>>61837960
I can relate to that, fa m.
>>
The girl I love just told me "You've changed" and left
https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=wu2ktiNT0kU
>>
>>61857911
I'm sorry wasn't trying to judge you I was just trying to let you know Im a little skewed in my sexual relations too
I don't know what to tell you though bro. It seems like you kinda got your mind made up. I hope you do find the one you can unload on and let all your weirdness and sexual frustration out on
It feels good man
>>
>>61838531
Don't get clingy and fuck it up
>>
>>61855286
dont
>>
https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=jBuwC4VJi50

I feel like I'll never amount to anything. I've never had an actual girlfriend locally, they've all been long distance and they've all cheated on me. Every girl that's expressed interest in me locally has said "Oh, I really like you, but I like someone else". My grades are slipping and I can't sleep. I'm struggling with digestive issues and am in and out of the doctor's office constantly. I'm scared to death of my depression returning. Suicidal thoughts are starting to return and I just can't take it anymore.
>>
>>61858393
dam are you me

hang in there bud. i love you. :)
>>
Red House Painters - Lord Kill The Pain

I'm in love with my friend Bec
>>
>>61845765
You're a saint. Don't let anyone tell you different.
>>
https://youtu.be/qP6ibr8rfRk
I used to be clueless when it came to girls, and I lost some really hot chick that clearly wanted my dick because I was too autistic to do the things I know to do now. It's too late to do that shit now.
>>
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>>61858541
It's not too late. There are more experiences, and there are definitely more hot chicks. They're a diamond dozen. You know what to do now, so Nike that shit next time, homie.
>>
>>61850380
Go for it if you like her and you feel like she does like you too. You can help each other with your problems. Talk about it honestly - it helps alot
>>
https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=echZnyQ1PzM

every day one of my friends comes visits me and checks up on me because I'm pretty ill and have trouble leaving the house. he's really sweet and nice to me but I feel like i'm bothering him just by existing. idk why he does it i don't understand. i love him so much but he thinks that i'm straight. im so awkward and i dont know what to do.even when hes here he just talks to me i barely even say anything. its nice though. hes really great.
>>
https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=zvz8jtZ3f5s
I feel like I'm going to die alone because I only like androgynous girls. They all end up being taken, or lesbians.
>>
>>61853726
basically anon showed up to a place with friends and people he didn't know while listening to a band or song called Forrest Gump (i assume) and before he could turn it off after pulling up some qt girl he didn't know go into the back of his car and stopped him so she could listen to it because she liked it as well and then they spent the rest of the night talking and anon is a very lucky guy basically
>>
>>61853955
drinking to get over something that makes you sad is the worst possible idea. alcohol is a depressant and as that suggests, it's going to make you sad. the first night you drink you'll wake up the next morning a little sad, and if you don't let the alcohol leave your system (at least 2-3 days), you'll just snowball it into pure sadness which will never leave until you stop drinking.

the hardest part of not drinking is the first 2 weeks. currently doing dry january so i can attest to this, but after that it seems to level out and you start to miss it less as you forget about it and your natural emotions and brain chemicals level out and you return to normal.

currently getting over gf as well so don't get me wrong, it won't make you happy, it'll just stop you from getting more and more sad, but you have to stop drinking (at least every day, make it on weekends or something), or you just won't get better. you'll get over her eventually, but you'll still be sad as fuck when you do because of all the alcohol.

try to spend your money on other things so you aren't able to buy alcohol and just push through it my friend, it's more than worth it, it's just hard as fuck
>>
>>61838411
If it's even possible for her to take that long to make her decision, then you and her are already over.
>>
my dad killed himself when I was 5 and this song got me thinking of him.

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=Ct1-oJrXSMc
>>
https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=SZRCft8ZPck

When I was 14 years old my dog of 8 years got cancer. She was too sick to eat and had trouble even walking. My parents refused to pay 300 dollars to put her down professionally so they tried to kill her by feeding her a bunch of pain meds but It didn't work. That night she was howling in pain for hours. I had made a batch of chloroform just in case it came to it and that night I used it to knock her out before I strangled her. I had to leave her there so the next morning my parents would find her and think she died in her sleep. No one to this day knows about it.
>>
I constantly feel apathetic about everything, interacting with other people and doing stuff by myself. Because of this I find myself becoming more of a social recluse day by day as I don't wish other people to have to suffer through my apathy.

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=0V-WGwJJj58
>>
https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=gavcjNniIv

My life has quickly been a downward spiral of failures, mom died, dad went to live with his girlfriend, spent chrismas and new year alone
I got a steady job, at least that's what's keeping me from going broke or mental.
I am just sad for the way things turned out
>>
>>61861117
the video was this one
https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=gavcjNniIvk

fuck can't even get that right haha
>>
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I wish my ex gf had died when she attempted suicide and failed.

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=_vbKGDslSUU
>>
this has to be one of the best things that's ever happened on /mu/
>>
I'm attracted to one of the few friends i have at college. Garrett
https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=YEzQV75LDL0
>>
>>61848526
Holy shit I feel same
>>
>>61839067
post your first album, anon
>>
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https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=5YdyEjC_FIU

When you're depressed, you feel it after brief moments of happiness. Maybe you saw something funny on 4chan. Maybe someone texted you for once. Then that happiness is ripped away from you. You forgot what you were excited about. You realize normal people are happy because they get excited about their future. But you think about your future and see nothing - not sadness - just the same shit. You'd rather be sad. You wish you could cry but you just can't. In the little conversation you have, you dwell on the negative because it's cathartic, not because you're actually concerned with the negative situation you brought up. You could care less. Apathy is your default setting. The other person pretends to care, and maybe he does, but you're only burdening him with your problems. You wish you could tell the person that you really don't give a shit and you're talking just to talk - living just to live. You don't understand how this person defaults to positivity, and why you're not connecting with this person. You just spoke from the heart. He should be drawn to that, right? You were brought up to be an empathetic person. It's been your downfall. You wish people told you about their problems. You'd like it more than a fun story about barhopping last weekend. It's your area of expertise. You'd have a lot to say about it. If only. If only you could talk about how everything is meaningless you'd be happy.
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