Why does /mlp/ want to tap her husband's ass rather than her's? Is it because of how skinny she is?
because Shining's hotter.
I love that princess bod, but I don't think we'd have a lot in common. Do we even know that much about her outside of her princess duties?
1. Vocal minority of fags.
2. Royalty makes ponies seem distant, for example Twilycorn. And you never hear about Shining Armor being a prince.
3. She is weirdly skinny, and I think it's a factor. More people here would fuck Mrs. Cake than her husband.
Not really. As far as I can tell her character is 'married Twilight Sparkle's brother', 'now rules the Crystal Empire because ??????', and then a bad episode where she just tagged along with TS for a while.
I like her, though, if only because she seems relatively normal besides the Princess thing.
Also there's the HI ANON collective headcanon: she's silly but well-meaning, and of course it all works out in the end.
So really I think it's like she's feature-complete already, without filling that missing part of you that you end up calling 'waifu'. She's a good and pretty pony and that's enough.
Pretty much. There's no downside to choosing Shiny. You could spend an entire day doing fun nerd shit, sports shit, or whatever, and at the end he'd always be happy to flick his tail aside and let you jackhammer his ponut as much as you want without having to worry about snapping his body in half like you would with Candyass.
>Shining is a total fuckboy with a big ass and unique body type. Costanza is string bean with literally no ass and reuses Fleur/Luna's body instead of going with something more interesting.
>Cadence has little to no personality, which is further made worse by the fact that the show treats her like Celestia instead of Luna (who they are more willing to show being vulnerable and not perfect). Shining does have personality and a kinda cute relationship with her sister
>fucking GRADIENT WINGS
>The depressed Crystal Ponies looked hotter.
>Even the normal ones like this sperm germ right here.
Imagine sex and peetzer at the same time. Stuffed crust.
>Crystal empire ponies demand that a ruler of her stature must have at least a few concubines to be considered respectable.
>Just then, you walk through the door.
>Cadence convinces you to be a royal concubine.
>"It's just for show until they get bored of it and find something else to complain about."
>Cadence and Shining Armor start to warm up to you since you're always one of their constant companions in the castle.
>You end up staying there long past when you'd thought the charade would last.
>One night, they summon you to their bedroom.
>"Anon. Why don't you let us teach you some things so you're not helpless when you find your first mare or stallionfriend?"
I agree. You're totally gonna be the meat in that sandwich.
I kinda see him as being more vers than anything else.