(Official Main Canon) Submission is Mandatory by MrNameless
Summary: As reward for helping Nightmare Moon defeat the Elements of Harmony, Anon has been given the Mane Six as personal slaves. One-by-one, Anon has broken them to his will through a variety of methods. The exception being Twilight Sparkle, who has yet to be fully broken. Now, besides Twilight, Anon has been tasked by Nightmare Moon with breaking Celestia.
Currently, Anon is allowing his personal maid, Octavia, to obtain a higher status within the castle by helping her assert her authority over her fellow maids. His plan however, has been interrupted by a messenger from Nightmare Moon.
Octavia POV by Escapade
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the disgusting neckbeards are at it again, whoop whoop!
Pfft, like death can keep a good hippophile down.
Posted two chapters of a new Applebloom thing last thread, and some bdsm incest on satyr within the last couple of weeks. All on my pastebin if you're interested.
If I reposted all the things I've written that fall under BDSM/S&M here, I'd have to drop about nine tenths of my bin.
I've been meaning to ask about your tips for anatomically correct clop bin.
Where did you get this data?
how do you judge the different orgasms as pleasurable events?
Where did you get the equine pregnancy thing from?
Where did you get the reaction to claws thing?
I've explored a lot of fetish stuff, spent some time hanging out on some anonymous zoophile chats during, as well as read several "how to" guides on a bunch of shit.
Some less sexual knowledge came from watching just tons of documentaries on animal planet and discovery (back when those channels weren't just shows about Alaska, gold prospectors, and Alaskan gold prospectors).
Then I brushed up a few small gaps with wikipedia, or good ol' google searches when that failed.
I don't know what you mean pregnancy thing.
I'd like you the depository of sex guides if I could find it again, and I've looked.
It had everything, guides on sexing dogs, horses, dolphins. The proper way to make love to corpses, glossaries on sex laws, all kinds of shit.
That's called the Bruce Effect.
It's something found in a lot of rodents, and proposed for non-equines. I know that articles on the effect once mentioned equines as a proposed species, but I just looked it up and those are gone. Could be an oversight. Googling "bruce effect in" still brought up a ton of pages on horses, and some on some kind of obscure species of baboon like monkeys I didn't know about. But this could be outdated. Or there could be an article oversight on the wiki.
Interestingly, lions are now cited as a species that might be able to do it.
Sorry I couldn't be more help. If I could go back, I'd save my sources.
Anyway, I'm going to bed.
If folks like these gents >>20047215 >>20047322 >>20047405 think I should, I could drop my old stuff as thread bumpers in the early AM hours when this place is deader than a graveyard.
I leave it up to the thread.
Thanks for the name. I checked the paper they quoted for lions and it mentions that it is highly unlikely that the bruce effect is present in lions. The wiki page is quoting out its ass.
Cute Nightmare is best Nightmare.
I can't help but think how adorable low-power NMM would be. Because if Luna got a little pony form at low power, why not her as well?
Molding her into a pet and breaking her will in that form would be so much fun.
>Today is the day.
>You've been waiting for a while, but you will have what you wanted.
>Servants scurry to and fro, frantically trying to get the palace ready for the the ambassadors from Saddle Arabia.
>Which of course, reminds you that you need to do the same.
>They arrive today, and you will be ready.
>Putting on your boots, you look at yourself in the mirror, noting that somethings missing.
>A burst of inspiration hits, and you toss on a rough leather duster.
>You make your way to the throne room, where a noise takes you off guard.
>Ducking behind a pillar, you see her, along with Celestia and a stallion..
"A bit early, but no harm done." you mutter under your breath.
>Lowering your hat, you step from inside the shadows towards the group.
>Everyone takes notice immediately.
>You point at the mare, and ask her.
"You! Is your name Amira?"
>"Yes. How may I help you?"
>It was rhetorical of course.
>Celestia shakes her head, but you ignore here.
>Instead, you lift your hat, and quick as lightning, you've got your rope spinning.
>Before she can process what you're doing, the rope is already around her neck.
>The mare struggles to break free while you fight against that.
>Everyone else can only stare in awe as you climb onto Amira's back and, using only her mane for support, hold on for dear life.
>She panics, kicks, runs, and snorts as she tries desperately to remove you from her back, but you hold tight.
>Soon however, she gives up, and you let out a small sigh as the exhausted mare surrenders to your will.
"And that everyone, is all there is to horse breaking. Just jump on, and hold tight till she stops struggling."
>"ANONYMOUS! Get off the ambassador's back! You're embarrassing me!"
"No can do princess. I broke her, I get to keep her. That's the natural order between humans and horses."
>Agreements fill the room, even Amira waves off the event.
"Alright, see you princess, gotta go train my horse. GIDDYUP!"
>Celestia can only shake her head as you ride away.
"Alright Amira. Just follow my instructions, and we'll have you a stable mate or two by the end of the day."
>"My lord, at the risk of speaking out of line, would it not be easier for you to simply walk up and sit on their backs, or for you to instruct me verbally?"
"You misunderstand, the thrill is in the struggle. You horsies have such fun instincts.
"Secondly, being able to work without a lot of words makes it more efficient. You don't need to think about it, simply do it."
>Amira nods, and you nudge her to trot out into P0nyville Square.
>You get a few looks, but most ponies try to pretend you're not there.
>Scoping the crowd for a mare you'd like to take home, you finally spot a couple of flanks you'd like to put your mark on.
>Unable to decide between them, you toss a coin to the ground, letting the face decide.
>The silver half bit piece gleams shines in the light as it rockets to the ground.
>Luna's eyes fall on a glorious moon indeed.
>A soft, buttery yellow horse that you've met on a couple of occasions, but never really talked to.
>Without warning, you set Amira into full gallop through the market.
>By the time she's even realized you're there, you've already roped the small mare and lept from Amira to finish the job.
>Unlike Amira however, Fluttershy doesn't put up a fight, simply freezing up as you bind her hooves and straddle her to prevent her from moving.
>Her lack of liveliness makes you reconsider for just a moment, but you decide to take her anyway.
>Whipping out an enchanted branding iron, you activate its magic, causing the tool to go from black to ashy grey in seconds.
>Rubbing down her haunch to make sure it's clear, you bring down the iron.
>A loud squeal rings through the air as you hold the tool in place, your weight and her binds preventing her from resisting.
>The actual burn lasts only 3 seconds, but the way she screamed, it probably felt like 3 hours to her.
Of course everyone starts posting right as I bump.
"Yeah, I'll be back, don't you worry."
>Just then, you notice Applejack's sister staring at you from beside the dirt path.
>With a sigh at your failure, you decide you can surely handle this Apple.
>Applejack still staring right at you, you lunge at the filly, forcing her to the ground before you press the hot iron into her left haunch.
>She screams and tries to squirm, but you hold her firmly in place.
>Pulling away the metal, AJ stares in utter surprise at the scene.
>"Now you look here mister!" She says as she marches up to you. "You best take dern good care of her, or I'll whoop yer flank!"
>You compliment your assurance with a pet of Applejack's mane before slinging the filly over your shoulder.
>"Alright then. That settles that."
>Bloom waves back excitedly as you walk away.
>"BYE SIS! TELL BIG MAC AND GRANNY AH LOVE EM!"
>"BYE APPLEBLOOM! YOU BE GOOD NOW!"
>With nothing else to do, and the sun setting, you head towards Fluttershy's place, you can come back for some of Appleblooms belongings in the morning.
>The sun peaks through the windows of the cottage, wresting you from your sleep.
>Sitting up, you look around the room.
>Laying about the cot made to accomodate your size lay your three soundly sleeping horsies.
>Now is a good a time as any to see how well they respond to orders, so you shake Fluttershy awake.
>"Mmmph. Huh? What?" the tired pony mumbles out.
"Wake up Fluttershy, it's morning."
>"Oh. OH! Good morning Anon! Umm, did you need something?"
"Yeah. I'm pretty hungry, I want you to get started on breakfast."
>"W..what would you like?"
"I saw you had some meat for the animals earlier. How about some of that?"
>"Yeah, for the animals....Should I make anything for the, uh, other girls?"
"Just some hay or whatever ponies normally eat will be fine."
>"Yes sir." she says with a nod before trotting quietly into the kitchen.
"Let's see. Meat, meat, meat...umm...I know!"
>Taking a skillet, several eggs, and some leftover ham, you begin making a huge omelet for what must be a huge appetite.
>Part way through cooking, you hear some strange sounds from the living room, but you pay them no mind.
>Popping the last chunk of unused ham in your mouth, you head over and take the hay off the cooker.
"There, that should be everything. Anon'll be so happy with me!"
>With a pleased nod, you walk to the living room.
"Alright everyone, breakfast is....ready...."
>You're greeted to the sight of Applebloom buried snout deep in Amira's marehood.
"Anon... What is Applebloom doing?"
>"I put her on cleaning duty after I finished up with Amira."
"Are you sure that's wise?"
>"She needs to learn how to be a good pet." He says, Applebloom breaking away long enough to nod vigorously. "You want her to become a good pet, right?"
"Well...of course I do!" you answer, surprised he'd ask that.
>"And what about you? You want to become a good pet, right?"
>This time, you're just the teensiest bit offended.
"Yes." you answer in an annoyed tone.
>"Good. Let's eat then. Come on girls."
>He pets your mane as he passes, sending shivers down your spine.
>"So, umm, where are we going Anon?"
"I'm going to pick up yours and Applebloom's medical records. You three are gonna head over to the farm and start getting her stuff together."
>"Oh! Can ah bring my toys? Please?"
"A few. Try to travel light."
>Arriving, you hop from Amira's back.
"Alright, you three go on, I'll handle this."
>Nodding, the mares move along, leaving you to handle the staff alone.
>The inside is clean and sterile, or as much as a building of sick people can be at least.
>Approaching the desk, you get the receptionist's attention.
>"Hello. May I help you?"
"Yes. I need to pick up some medical records, my...family and I are moving, and I need them before we leave."
>"I see sir. Do you have any paperwork for the pick up?"
>"Well sir, I can't hand it over without an order unless they're here."
>"It's alright Sweet Treat. I know what he's here for." another mare says stepping into the room with her.
>She steps from behind the desks, and beckons you over.
>"Mister Anonymous right? I'm nurse Redheart. I hear you're dragging a few of our ponies away when you go?"
"What was that? Stop mumbling."
>"Oh, nothing. Please follow me."
>You're led into a common doctors office.
>"Alright Mr. Anon, who are the ponies you've, umm, adopted?"
"Fluttershy, and Applebloom. You know them?"
>"Indeed I do. Wait here and I'll get a copy of their files for you."
>Taking a seat on the bed, you wait.
>It's been almost an hour when you're starting to get a little annoyed.
>Just as you're about ready to go looking for her, the door opens, and Redheart hands you two binders labled with your newest pets names.
>"There you are Mr. Anonymous. Is there anything else you need?"
"Hmm...Well, some pain killers for my girls brands could be nice. They must hurt terribly, but they've just grinned and beared it. Really good girls."
>"Well...I'd need one of them here first to see how strong they need the painkillers to be, but if you come back later, I'm sure we can handle things."
>Rubbing your chin, you get a better idea.
>Catching the mare off guard, you manage to grab her and move her to the bed before she realizes what's happening.
>She bucks, whinnies, bites, and tries to run, but it does her no good.
>You soon manage to bind her with the beds built in binds, rendering her struggle futile.
>Whipping out your branding iron, you push the mare's face deep into a pillow to muffle her cries and not disturb anyone.
>With the iron heated, you press the hot grey metal into her.
>The air fills with the smell of burnt hair and the sound of agony, but you don't relent.
>Soon enough however, you remove the tool, leaving a permanent black mark on the soft colored nurse.
>The job done, you remove the leather binds and help Redheart down.
"And there we go. Give it a few hours, then get something for how much it still hurts."
>She nods, then takes a small, careful step as she adjust to the marked flesh.
"Oh, and don't choose anything that promotes healing. I want it to come out distinct."
>"Ye-ow. Yes sir. Before you go, a personal request?"
>"Well, it's about my job, I-"
"Say no more. You can stay in town long enough to find a proper replacement."
>She cracks a small smile.
>"Thank you sir!"
"Well, if there's nothing else, I should be going. I'll leave your future address at the front desk."
>"Very well then, I'll see you later then."
>Petting her mane, you stroll out of the building, dropping a card at the front, and head towards the farm to help the girls with their preparations.
>With the stones placed, the other 5 girls leave Twilight alone to do her thing.
>Grabbing the closest pony, a certain little dress horse, you hold your hand firmly over her mouth as you push the branding iron into her flesh.
>Instructing her to stay quiet, you move for the next 4.
>Running with your freshly marked herd up the stairs, you hear nightmare moon finishing up a little evil speech as you arrive.
>"You little foal, thinking you could defeat me! Now you will never see you princess or your sun! The nigh, will last, FOREVER! AHAHAHA!"
>You watch on from the shadows as Twilight teleports behind Nightmare Moon to do her little magic trick, to no effect.
>Pretty soon, the other 5 join her, right as Nightmare breaks the damn rocks.
>The other 5 step forward, their shock and fear overiding their orders.
>Then...the most awful thing you've ever seen happens.
>Twilight launches into this long speech about the literal power and magic of friendship, and how these people she just met are so important in her life.
>It's the cheesiest shit you've ever heard, like some shit out of a bad movie.
>You just never expected someone to actually say such cringeworthy garbage.
>Tired of listening, you walk past Twilight, towards Nightmare.
>"Anon? What are you doing here?" Twilight asks as the shards loose their magic and drop to the ground.
"Just putting an end to the campiest bullshit I've ever heard."
>Nightmare moon seems both confused and amused at your approach.
>"And what exactly do YOU intend to do?"
>With a sudden mad dash, you're on her.
>Her instincts kick in as she tries for a brief moment to flee.
>Much to your surprise however, she turns back on you.
>"I..I will not be intimidated. I'm...the queen of the night. I shall not...shall not fear or...or be controlled!"
>She sounds as unconvinced as you.
>Another bolt, and you've taken hold of her mane.
>In a panic, she tries shaking free, but it only gives you time to climb onto her back.
>The black horse bucks and jumps, trying desperately to get you off her back.
>"GET! OFF! OF! ME! APE!"
>She has far more fight in her than anyone else you've broken, and it eventually pays off.
>With a bit of luck on her part, she manages to make you loose balance and fall.
>A saving grab to her tail keep you in the game though, and you grab her by the fetlocks before she can kick you.
"YOU'RE NOT GETTING OUT OF THIS NAG!"
>With a hard yank, the dark mare falls to the floor.
>Siezing the chance, you pin the inept villian and quickly whip out your trusty iron.
>A small change of the incantation causes it to instead freeze so cold that mist cascades off of it.
>She squirms as you press the sub-zero tool into her haunch.
>"GAH! COLD! WHAT ARE YOU DOING?"
"Freeze brand." you say, lifting the iron. "The hair'll fall out and grow back white. A normal brand would hardly work, eh darky?"
>Realizing she's been caught, Nightmare stops fighting.
>Allowing her to stand, you promptly climb onto the mare's back.
"Alright Moonie, let's go."
>"Do not call me that! I am the night, rightful queen of-"
>A small smack echos in the room as you hit her with a rolled paper.
"Not anymore you're not. First rule, no evil antics, and no dark monologues."
>She grumbles a bit, but nods.
>"Hey Anon. What about Twi here? Ya gonna brand her?"
>Twilight jumps from her gaping, wide eyed stare into a defensive stance.
>"Wait, what now?"
"Nah, after that little spiel of hers, I don't want her. Shit gave me ear cancer."
>"What? That' not...Anon? Where are you going? What about the sun? And eternal night?"
"It's all crap mythology, sun's coming, just wait."
>You and your mares begin the long walk to town as the sun peaks over the horizon, leaving behind a very confused Twilight.
There, some old green to get some people in here. Forgot how much fun this thing was. It almost turned into an actual story for me way back when.
I know what you mean. I'm tempted to write the idea myself, even though I've got a current story that needs updating and other ideas that I want to do as well.
Feel free to take the idea if you want, I have no idea when I would get around to doing it. If no one else takes it I probably will do it myself eventually, though.
Some time in the next frigging year or two, considering how slow I seem to work sometimes.
Go ahead and write it. I've got at least one big story to finish first, and then I can decide which of my like... three options I want to write next.
Assuming I don't get distracted by stray short stuff in the meantime.
>"... how do they maintain a healthy weight?"
God damn it I lost it
> No story with Sunset.
My boner can't deal with it.
Never watched the movies, so I have absolutely no idea how to write her.
Although enslaving her instead of redeeming her at the end of the first movie would probably be pretty neato. I always liked it when enemies are left helpless and then instead of being forgiven, they are completely crushed.
CHecking in. I have 9 entires for Octavia ready, but I can't stop this feeling that my scenes feel... Rushed. I'm taking my time to see if I can improve the pace of the story, but Intend to drop it tonight.
Nigga, watch EG2 and Sunset become your new waifu.
Slow fucking day, Jesus
Getting close to finished, hopefully, I'll have some Bloom tonight.
Waifu is just the pet you can trust to watch over the other pets.
>Slow fucking day, Jesus
Sorry, been playing Freeorion all day. No progress on main story whatsoever. Could dump a couple posts of absolutely non-sexy shota story green if wanted. Probably won't get to sexy on that for a while either.
> Not trusting NMM to watch over the other pets.
> Not allowing her to help govern them while you are gone as a reward for her being obedient to you.
> Not watching from your hidden cameras as she takes turns honing their skills to perfection.
> Not having to punish her when she finally gets too controlling for her own good.
> Not breaking through her pride and wearing her down until she begs for mercy.
> Not drying her tears as she accepts her place at your feet.
> Not cuddling through the night with your Queen of Slaves.
Does nobody have anything to post while writefags prepare?
Decided to post some of the other story I'm working on. All side stories will be posted under ERA, fyi. WARNING: shota content ahead.
Spike Makes Amends
"Spike! I can't believe you! That wasn't just any old book! That was one of only two known surviving copies of Starswirl the Bearded's "Treatise on Arithmancy"! It was worth millions of bits, and we need the seals inscribed in it to perform the maintenance of the Gates of Taurtarus!"
>"Tw..twilight, I'm sorry…"
"Sorry's not good enough Spike! Do you want Tirek to come back!? Or any of the hundreds of other demons and monsters that are sealed in there?"
>You stomp out of the room, leaving the baby dragon in the frilly pink apron covered in hearts on the verge of tears.
>This is the peril of having a DRAGON for a LIBRARY assistant.
>This means she was going to have to talk to HIM.
>That disgusting, perverted monkey creature who lives in that big castle north of Canterlot.
>But his book collection is second to none. He let you in to look around one time. He had works that you thought were lost forever, and not just a few, but hundreds.
>He said he would let you read them, for a "price".
>Filthy Celestia-darned pervert.
>Like you would ever…
>You hit your head against one of the walls of your crystal palace.
>Who knows what price he'll demand for you to take the book out of his library?
>And not just for a little while. You're going to need at least 8 months to complete the reinforcement, and that's with Luna's help. And it needs to be done fast.
>Maybe Princess Celestia can help you.
"SPIKE! I need you to take a letter for Princess Celestia!"
>He comes jogging in, quill and parchment in claw. But you notice something.
>He's been crying.
>Oh pumpkin bread! You didn't mean to hurt his feelings. You were just frustrated.
>You bring him in for a hug.
>"I..I'm sorry Twilight, I didn't m.m.mean to."
"It's ok, Spike, I know you didn't mean it. I know where to find another one, it's just that getting it is going to be…unpleasant."
>He wipes his eyes.
>"Whaddya mean, Twi?"
"Well, remember that hairless ape creature that had the huge library?"
>"Oh yeah, the one you rushed us out of that time?"
"Yeah…I know I saw a copy of it in there, but…"
>He looks at you curiously.
>"But what Twi…"
>You try to think of a way to put it that won't be too vile for the baby dragon.
"Well, he would want someone to spend a long time with him doing a lot of hard things that I…just don't want to do."
>"Well, maybe I could help! It's the least I could do since I…accidentally destroyed the book…And I am your number one assistant after all, right!?"
>He looks eager, almost desperate to do this for you.
>But you just can't. That pervert would do things to him that would just destroy his young mind, you were certain.
"No, absolutely not. It's really only something a girl can do anyways. Now, I need you to take that letter."
"Dear Princess Celestia…"
>Be on the train to Canterlot with Twilight.
>You feel really bad about causing all this trouble.
>Luckily Twilight knew where to get a replacement for the book you accidentally burned up.
>But apparently it was going to be hard to get a hold of.
>She said it's the sort of thing only a female could do, but you bet you could do anything a girl could.
>Speaking of Twilight, she's been off in her own world since you two were summoned to Canterlot.
>You didn't even have time to round up the other girls.
>Twilight said that was for the best though. What needed to be done to get the book was best done by just one mare.
>Whatever that means.
>You still want to help though.
>Luckily, or unluckily, depending on how you look at it, Rarity hadn't come along, so you only had to deal with a small overnight bag for Twilight.
>Honestly, you weren't sure why you were here. Twilight could have handled this few bags, and she didn't need you to deal with the bald monkey or whatever, but Celestia had specifically requested that you come.
>"NEXT STOP, CANTERLOT! CANTERLOT, NEXT STOP!" the conductor shouted.
>Well, anyways, you were looking forward to the stay. Whenever you went to Canterlot, you got your own room with your own HUUUUGE bed, not just the little shoebox at the end of Twilight's bed like you usually sleep in.
>You really like to be able to spread out.
>You wonder if that isn't why you never seem to get any bigger.
>The thought flits out of your head as the train pulls up to the station.
>"Come on Spike, I want to go straight to the castle. No time for sightseeing."
>You knew that. Jeez, does she think you're an idiot?
"Alright Twilight, I've got our bags, let's get going!"
>Fake enthusiasm. You're still a bit bummed about destroying that old tome.
>Before long, you arrive at the castle gates.
>The guards are acting a little weirder than usual.
>They insist that you and Twilight separate.
>"Young master, please let me escort you to your room while Princess Twilight meets with Princess Celestia."
>Man this guard is annoying.
>But you are glad. You didn't really want to face the Princess as the one who destroyed Starswirl's book.
>Twilight doesn't even acknowledge you as she trots off with the other one.
>You follow the other guard, and before long you are at your room. You enter as the other guard returns to his post, only to find another guard inside.
>"Ah, Master Spike, would you please come with me? The Princess would like a word with you."
>MASTER Spike? Seems a bit odd. And if the Princess wanted to talk with you, why didn't she just have the guards bring you along with Twilight?
>You shrug and set your overnight bags on the two respective beds before following the guard out into the hall.
>You seem to be walking a long way.
>Isn't this Luna's wing?
>Almost as if to answer that question, the guard, who you actually just noticed was a batpony, opens a door and signals for you to go in.
>You can't believe you didn't notice that earlier. Maybe Twilight is right, you do need to pay more attention to what is going on around you.
>Speaking of which, you are in a smallish room, with a single red carpet leading up to a mid-sized throne.
>And on it is Luna.
>Weird, it's the middle of the day. Why is she up at this hour?
So, I wrote a tiny story some time ago about predator/prey-play involving Anon and a blank pony, and I complained about there not being any similar stories like it.
So I found this on FiMFiction and I'm reading it right now.
My dick is rock hard, to say the least.
>"Indeed, come forth, young dragon. We have a most important and difficult task that we must ask you to fulfill."
>Uh-oh. That doesn't sound good.
>But still, you feel a twinge of pride that you, and YOU ALONE are being asked for a favor by a princess other than Twilight. A REAL favor, not just "Spike, would you mind washing my dress, I need to go Princess it up with all the mares while you sit around here doing nothing."
>You'd think you would get a little love around here after you saved the day in the Crystal Empire, but that apparently only goes so far.
>Anyways, you have walked up to the base of the stairs, and are now bowing before Luna's throne.
>Like she ever did anything worthwhile.
>Don't think that way Spike, she's had a hard life!
"Y..you wanted to see me, Princess Luna?"
>"Indeed. As we said earlier, we have a most important task for you, one that we fear that none other than you can truly fulfill, and one which the fate of Equestria rests upon its successful completion."
>Jeez, no pressure or anything.
>You give her a look, which she ignores while she continues to speak.
>"Spike, the human, Lord Anonymous, has amassed a great fortune both in coin and knowledge since his arrival here several years ago, and has erected a great castle to the north of these lands. We have need of a particular book in his possession, which possesses powerful magical symbology within its pages, symbology that is lost to the sands of time among the living, beyond the level of either I or my sister to reinscribe."
>"Spike, we need a book from Lord Anonymous."
"Oh. Yeah, Twilight told me about that, minus the name."
>"Yes, well, Lord Anonymous is a bit of an eccentric. It seems that he requires a high price for the use of the rarer books in his library."
"Twilight had mentioned that. Something about something that only a girl could do?"
>Yes, well, that's not exactly correct…"
You mean just last thread? I saved that, btw, in case we need thread bumpers later. I thought the pony was supposed to be Twilight. Maybe I got the impression from the twilight images that were posted alongside it.
>You are knocking on the door of a huge castle.
>And you mean HUGE. It's nearly as big as the one at Canterlot, except this one is in the middle of a forest, which is itself in the middle of nowhere, a few miles off the nonexistent stop where the railroad line let you off about midway between Canterlot and the Crystal Empire.
>You wish you were going there instead.
>They love you so much there.
>And all the crystals you could eat.
>Your belly grumbles, beneath the maid outfit you were wearing.
>The weird, maid outfit with the extremely short skirt and separate top that barely covered your little dragon nipples.
>Luna had said that this guy was really lonely, and wanted some companionship.
>You're not sure why that meant that you needed to wear this really embarrassing getup.
>Your thoughts scatter as the small door within the greater gate opens, and, somewhat to your surprise, an Earth pony answers.
>"Yess, and you might be?"
"Uhhh, I'm Spike the Dragon. Ummm, from Canterlot?"
>"Oh yes, wonderful, the Master will be so pleased to meet you!"
>You smile a little at the seeming earnestness of his greeting. You don't realize it but you are blushing quite a bit as well.
>"Ah, yes, and dressed most appropriately as well, please come inside!"
>You follow him in to see the most amazing garden you have ever seen in your life. It's at a level of ornateness that matches, or even surpasses that of the Royal Canterlot Garden.
>There is a path straight down the center of it, which you jog along as you try to keep up with the much larger stallion…butler? you guess?
>The pony butler spared a look at you as you moved a bit too briskly through the ornamental gardens.
"Uhhm, could you tell me why exactly I'm here? Princess Luna said that I was going to be doing SOMETHING for Lord Anonymous, but she didn't really say what. I don't think I can keep a huge place like this clean all by my self…"
>"Oh, I wouldn't worry about THAT," he laughed
Oh, It's nothing special I assure you. Barely two posts long and I hadn't wrote anything in a while so I was a bit rusty.
Well, I made it as non-specific as possible, but I like Twilight the most for it myself, and I had the images.
>Applebloom has been practically shaking with excitement since the ride began. Almost three days of watching endless fields and plains roll by are close to done.
>Not to say it isn’t relaxing, but it gets a bit boring.
>It’s been a long, but rewarding few months with the little filly, but it’s certainly paid off.
>She’s beyond beautiful, dropping jaws and genitals alike wherever she goes.
>Her current plug is as large as you intend to make it until she’s a couple of years older, and she can wear it 24/7.
>She’s earned a much nicer collar. Still a leather one, but it’s a custom job instead of a common dog collar.
>Her standard greeting for you is now Master.
>And she’s become comfortable with her position.
>While you of course have to walk her through new things, gone are shame and hesitation for many things that once frightened her.
>Baths are a time for bonding, and they keep her pretty for you.
>The plug is a gift from you to her that keeps her from feeling empty, and it’s okay to hold her tail high.
>You even got her a silk tail wrap. It looks pretty good, you think.
>The collar says she’s yours, and she’s proud of it.
>And a leash just means you don’t want to be away from her.
>Today however, you’re having a bit of trouble controlling her excitement. Not that you can blame her.
>After almost four months in the gloom of Hollow Shades, it’s not a surprise she’d relish the chance to visit her old home and get some sunshine.
>She continues her chatter for another hour or so before you decide you’d really like a little quiet.
>Calling Applebloom over, you pull her head into your lap.
>As trained, she shuts out all distraction and prepares to earn herself a few snacks, giving you a while to your own thoughts.
>Several hours and four blowjobs later, the creaky wagon pulls up into the town with a lurch.
>Applebloom clearly wants to get out and start talking to people, but you prevent that.
>Instead, you kneel down closer to her level and address her in your serious voice.
“Now, Applebloom, listen. I know you’re excited, but when we get out, I want you to behave like we’re still home.”
“That means no leaving my side without asking, keep your manners, and you still have to follow orders.”
“Your behavior reflects on me. Even around your friends and family. Especially around them.”
“Just be patient, and I promise you’ll get to visit everyone. Understand?”
>The filly responds with a small bow and a smile.
>”Of course Master! Won’t no one be sayin yer a bad owner on my watch!”
“That’s my girl.” you say as you give the filly a pat on the back. “Let’s get you dressed and we’ll go.”
>After sliding on her little silver hoof cups and a simple yet elegant dress, you start making your way to Sweet Apple Acres.
>The effect is greater than that of the slightly desensitized people back home.
>Jaws and genitals drop left and right at the sight of the gorgeous filly, who makes it a point to strut a little.
>Hmm, if she’s begun doing that, it might be time to train her gait.
>You might not know much about dressage, but you can try.
>The walk through the orchard is peaceful, though Applebloom is very eager to tell you about every little spot.
>”And that spot is where Winona had her puppies. And that tree is where lightning struck. And over there is where Big Mac and AJ took me campin when ah was jus a foal.”
>She suddenly becomes a little sadder.
>”That was before our parents died. Things were better then.”
>You stop, causing the filly to imitate.
“I’m sorry. How’d it happen?”
>”Bandits.” She replies curtly.
“Didn’t your dad have a harem? What happened to the rest of them?”
>”Well, our dam was the Apple, our sire just lived here ‘cause it he was from town and it was big enough for everyone.”
>”When they both died, the others didn’t have much reason ta stick around ah guess, they pulled up roots and took their foals with ‘em. We were left with Granny ‘cause she was blood.”
>”Those were hard times.”
>There’s really no right way to respond to that type of thing besides listen.
>So you decide to do just that.
>Getting down to her level, you take the filly in a tight hug.
“I’m sorry you had to go through all that. But anytime you wanna vent, you can talk to me.”
>”It’s alright, Master.” She says as she return the hug. “I was too little ta remember much. And now ah got the nicest stallion in all Equestria.”
>With a small smile, you hoist the small pony up, carrying her the rest of the way up the path till you reach the farm house.
>It’s a modest, somewhat aged wooden structure.
>While well built, it’s was clearly meant to house several more people than it currently does, giving it an almost abandoned feeling.
>Compared to last time you were here however, it seems to have received several repairs and no longer looks rickety or unsafe.
“Well Applebloom. You ready?”
>”Sure am!” she nods “Ah been missin ‘em somethin’ fierce.”
>Setting the filly down, she knocks and you wait.
>A few seconds pass, and an impatient Applebloom knocks again.
>”AH’M A COMIN! HOLD YER HORSES!”
>Their cultures love of equine expressions will never cease being amusing.
>As the door creaks open, the green eyes of a familiar mare go wide.
>”A-Applebloom? That you?”
>The orange pony rushes forward, nuzzling her sister’s neck in the equine equivalent of a hug.
>”GRANNY! BIG MAC! GET OUT HERE! APPLEBLOOM’S BACK!”
>Heavy thunks are heard as the Applebloom’s brother gallops down from the second floor, followed shortly after by their hobbling grandmother.
>For a couple of minutes, happy whinnies and nickers that sound more emotion than speech fill the air as the family walk circles around themselves in their socialization.
>After a moment however, they begin to come down from their initial high and their attention turns to you.
>Applejack, who seems to be the most well spoken of the family steps forward, seemingly taking a moment to try to decide what to say.
>”If’n ya got tired of her, we… I doubt we can afford to buy her back, much as we miss her.” she claims, her voice low so as to not concern the filly.
>You can only laugh.
“No no no. Nothing of the sort. If anything, I underpaid you for her.”
>They look confused, to say the least.
>Applebloom starts walking over with a questioning look on her face.
>”Uh, Master? Ah don’t think ya ever told me how much ya payed for me, now that ah think about it.”
“25 gold bits.” you tell her before you pull a gold bit from your coin purse, tossing it directly into the brim off Applejack’s hat.
>”WOW!” The filly beams, clearly feeling good about herself. “That’s like, almost twice what tha farm makes in a whole year!”
“Yep!” you exclaim as you ruffle her mane slightly. “Your family made a good case about how great you are. And I couldn’t agree more.”
>That was a lie. At least, the part about their negotiation skills was.
>Their asking price was much, much lower. You just overpaid because it made you feel less like an asshole.
>”W..well, Mister Anon.” She starts as she tucks the bit you gave her into her hat band, continuing when you don’t stop her. “If yer not here for that, why’d ya come all this way?”
“Simple enough. Applebloom was missing her friends and family, so I made time for us to visit.”
>The tension in the air releases like a balloon.
>”Well that’s right kind of ya. Why don’tcha come in? We’d like a chance to get to know more about ya.”
>Nodding, you follow them into the home, preparing for backache of the too low ceiling.
>For the rest of the evening, you talk and eat with the Apple family.
>From the affairs of the farm and town, to your work, Applebloom’s ongoing cutie mark search, or the non-sexual aspects of her new life.
>There’s a little cringe from them whenever Applebloom casually calls you master, but all in all they just seem glad that she’s happy.
>And honestly, based on the number of battered mares you’ve seen, especially owned ones, you’d say a bit of training and an occasional pop with the riding crop isn’t so bad.
>Hmm, you don’t know if their society is ready for that kind of change, but maybe a refuge for the battered would be a nice charity to experiment with.
>You’ll have to look into it.
>Later that night, you’re laying in Applebloom’s old room, the little filly playing small spoon as always.
>Her old bed was too small, of course, so the two of you made a pallet on the floor.
>Seems that, other than a couple of cider barrels being stored here, it’s been left untouched since she left.
“Hmm? What is it Bloom?”
>”Ah was just wonderin… is there any chance we could bring Sweetie and Scoots with us when we go home?”
“Your little friends you talk about, right?”
>”Yeah, ah really miss havin ‘em around to play with.”
“I can look into it I suppose..”
>Your little wife shifts her weight harder into your side, snuggling you as best she can.
>”Thanks master! Yer the best.”
“So what are their families like?” You inquire, unsure if they would give up their daughters to you.
“Like, do they have money, how big is the herd, how many foals are there, how are they treated?
>”Oh, well Sweetie’s family are pretty nice, but kinda weird. They ain’t rich but they got some money.”
>She pauses to think.
>”All their foals have grown up out and moved ‘cept Sweetie. Ah think Mister Magnum has 5 mares.”
>”She ain’t too close to her family. Ah think mister Swift Wing used to be a town guard or somethin, but now he just drinks a lot.”
“Does he mistreat Scoots?”
>”Not that ah know. He mostly just ignores her. He seems real sad all the time.”
>Sounds like they’d probably be willing to part. Sweetie, maybe not.
“Yeah, alright. I don’t think we’ll be going home alone.”
>She turns to hug you again, but you stop her.
>She’s instead greeted by the feeling of your member prodding her nethers.
>”I..is it time, Master?” she asks in a shaky voice, her tail rolling aside to give you full access.
“Yes.” you claim with a smile she can’t see. “If you’re about to become an alpha mare, it’s time you were made a mare.”
>It really was a long time coming.
>While you’ve masturbated the filly frequently as a reward and trained her rump for your fetishes, you’ve never actually used any of her holes except her mouth.
>It helped instill a sense of serving without there being a need to receive.
>You get to your knees and light a small lantern as the filly scrambled to her hooves, ready for you to take your prize.
>If her winking, leaking, and jiggling of her plugged plot is any indication, she’s been looking forward to this for a while.
>However, you decide to make her work for it a little.
>Placing your hands on her blank, yellow haunches, you dig your nails into her flesh and drag them back.
>A chill runs down her spine and her breath hitches in her throat.
>You repeat it a few times upon the paralyzed pony before leaning in.
“Very good, Applebloom. You’d have been in real trouble if you’d kicked.”
>She can only croak out a small “Thank ya.” as you nibble her ears.
>Gripping the toy by the base, you give it some light tugs and pushes before sliding it halfway out.
“Now tell me Applebloom. Who’s an obedient little filly?”
>You slam the plug back into her, rocking her body and earning a moan, before you slide it half out again.
“And what’s the most important thing to you?”
>”M..my, unnnha, my Master.”
>You push in again, bringing her to the edge.
>After waiting a few seconds for her to come down, you pull it out again.
“Why do you serve?” you whisper into her ear.
>”B..because it makes...makes my owner happy.”
>Another push leaves the filly a leaves the filly a leaky mess, hanging on the agonizing edge of orgasm.
>A couple of seconds pass, and you pull it out again.
“And who is this master who owns you, mind, body and soul?”
>”You are! Ah’m yer little pet to… mmph…. to use how ya want!
>Covering her mouth, you give the toy a final slam, causing her body to convulse as she releases a torrent of mare cum onto the floor.
>Considering her to now be properly warmed up, you line yourself with the exhausted filly’s sopping hole.
>Sliding your head into the hole, you find it tight, wet, velvety, and amazingly warm.
>Despite her post orgasmic haze, her body knows exactly what’s happening, and quickly clamps down.
>Her equine muscle certainly lives up to its reputation, fitting you like a glove, massaging you, and trying to pull you deeper.
>You seen hit a wall, however, and realize you’ve hit her hymen.
>By this point, Applebloom has regained some sense of clarity, however. So you let her know.
“Applebloom, brace yourself.”
>She complies, but for what reason, she doesn’t know.
>After a little teasing to warm her up, you give a single, mighty thrust, plowing past her hymen, which gives a pop that you feel far more than hear, and hilt yourself inside.
>The action is enough to force her once more over the edge, causing her sex to squeeze you like a vice.
>As soon as she releases, you find the area around your head to be pretty loose.
>Simply figuring this to be the so called flare cavern, you move a bit and confirm that, yes, your length just manages to kiss the opening of her cervix.
>Not waiting for her to come down, you begin having your fun, subjecting your pet to the agonizing pleasure of overstimulation.
>Not that she seems to mind, of course.
>Though she’s been reduced to guttural moans, though her legs have given out, her body still responds.
>Her welcoming insides still mold to your size, and continually try to pull you back in. Her frantic winking like a rapid series of kisses being lavished on your rod and sack.
>Again and again you ride the helpless young mare, coaxing orgasm after orgasm from her tiny frame.
>All too soon, however, you find yourself on the edge.
>Grabbing Applebloom by the hips, you bury yourself as deeply into her as possible before raising your hand to plant a firm smack on her butt which echoes through the room.
>The pain and surprise causes the filly to clamp down incredibly tightly, pushing you past your limit.
>Your hips buck as your seed explodes into the moaning filly. Spurt after spurt, being deposited directly into her waiting womb.
>You linger a moment in your bliss, Applebloom’s rhythmic muscle work trying to milk you for any stray drops.
>Finally however, you resist her efforts to keep you in, pulling out with a wet schlick.
>No longer being stimulated, Applebloom promptly collapses from exhaustion.
>You’ll need to talk about that in the morning. For now, you move her away from the puddle of her own lust before laying down yourself to sleep.
>The next morning began with a talk about how she was expected to clean you when you didn’t just use her mouth to begin with.
>Afterwards, you took a trip to the local lake for a bath, seeing as how 3 days on a coach and a night of vigorous sex didn’t do any favors for either of you hygienically.
>But finally, you set out to the homes of the other crusaders to discuss the prospect of buying them as new brides.
>Which finally brings you to now. Sitting in a room in the town hall, documents ready and just waiting for signatures and a price.
>At your sides sit Applebloom and Applejack, who came as a character witness.
>After a while of waiting, the doors swing open, ponies filing through in 2 groups.
>One group consists of an earth stallion in a straw hat, two well kept unicorn mares, and a unicorn filly who you assumed to be Sweetie.
>The second was a shabby brown pegasus mare, followed by an equally shabby orange pegasus filly.
“Hello mister Magnum I’m glad you could make it. I assume this is Sweetie? And who are this lovely mares with you?”
>He reaches out, shaking your hand.
>”Glad I could make it. Yes, this is my little Sweetie. And this is my third wife Pearl, Sweetie and Rarity’s mother.” he tells you, pointing first to the pink unicorn, then to the white.
“Charmed.” you say before turning to the pegasai. “I don’t believe we met when I scheduled this. You’re one of Swift Wing’s wives I presume?”
>”Yes, Soaring Dawn, if you’d please. I was Swift trusted me to handle things here.”
>”Mister, umm, Mouse was it.?” Starts Magnum.
>”Mous. First I have to ask why we would sell our daughter’s hoof in marriage to you? She’s not an unattractive filly, and we’re not short on money.”
>As you piece together a response, Rarity speaks up for you.
>”Father, surely you didn’t come out here just to say no. Yes? We must recognize the...opportunity we are being presented.”
>”Indeed. Sir Mous has been declared as one of the most influential figures since Starswirl himself. To have him take an interest in our little Sweetie. OH~ you can’t take that from her.”
>”I mean, look at her. He’s transformed a farm worker, a common laborer into a sight fit for royal court.
>Magnum seems to think for a moment before addressing Applejack who’s currently scowling at Rarity.
>”Applejack, you know him best. How would you say this Mous fellow has treated your sister?”
>”Uhh, ‘bout as well as ah could hope. Better than any bought mare ah ever saw. Better than most normal ones.”
>He then turns to Applebloom herself.
>”Tell me little one, would you leave this stallion if you could?”
>The effect is immediate. She latches to your side, shaking her head violently.
>”Nu-uh. Mister Anon’s been the best husband ah coulda hoped for. He’s nice, he taught me ta read ‘n write. He let’s me help ‘em with his important inventor stuff.”
>”I see he’s done nothing for your, ahem, rural accent.” Rarity claims, seemingly without speaking.
>”He says it’s cute! That ah’m his lil’ southern bell, whatever that means.”
>This bit of information seems to greatly upset Rarity for some reason.
>You’re about to break it up when pearl speaks up.
>”I’d like to ask about bedroom specifics.”
>”Shush Rarity, this is important. I’m like to make sure you wouldn’t be too rough on my little girl.”
“Well” You begin. “It’s no secret I expect submission and obedience. Otherwise, I wouldn’t be looking to buy.
“But no, while I certainly have my share of...sexual proclivities, I don’t get my jollies brutalizing them. The bond between dominant and submissive is one of trust, after all.”
>This answer seems to satisfy her. Turning to the pegasus, you prod her to actually say something.
“What about you, miss Dawn? Do you have any questions?”
>”O..oh, yeah. Can we visit her?”
>”Yes. If they want you to. I’ll bring them by now and then. If you want to come out there, send me a letter first, so I can make sure my schedule is clear.”
>This seems to conclude all large questions.
>After this, it’s simply a long list of chatter and ironing out specifics. You get a chance to ask about their family lives, medical histories, and a chance to examine and talk with the fillies themselves.
>Finally, it comes time to decide prices. So the families are split into two rooms, the fillies sent off to catch up, and Applejack relieved to go about her business.
>After all is said and done, Scootaloo is sold to you for 12 gold bits, Sweetie for 31.
>Two days later, after giving them time to get everything in order, you’re helping load their possessions into a deluxe carriage, including a few things Applebloom left the first time around.
>And a barrel of cider you yoinked off of Applejack for a couple of coppers to make the three day trip less frightening for the new fillies aboard.
>Ponyville isn’t a bad town, but you can’t wait to get home.
Alrighty, there's part 3.
Hope you guys like it.
>>Simply figuring this to be the so called flare cavern, you move a bit and confirm that, yes, your length just manages to kiss the opening of her cervix.
Assuming he hilted this would make his dick around 4 cm when erect.
Sad penis is sad...
This has some of the data I have
(Haven't updated it with newer stuff)
It doesn't have the foal vaginal length data but I did some calculations on paper for the scootaloo pic (measured the x-axis of the torso and scaled vagina to be relative to normal horse vagina).
Wow, that's some dedication.
If I didn't hate that it's basically used as an insult for someone caring about anything you consider unimportant, it might even be called autistic.
I'll read over the details later later, but I'll say this for now, just past on a brief skim, Celestia and Iron Will's size both fluctuate wildly scene by scene, so a lot of math about them is debatable.
Luckily, Iron Will has a scene (When he comes to get his payment) where he tries using his raw size for intimidation, while Fluttershy is standing right next to him. Since size is important to the scene, it probably makes a better bar for accuracy than a normal standing scene.
Alright. Maybe a lot of the math went over my head, but I think I noticed a couple more small flaws. First, as far as I can tell, you didn't seem to account for the filly in the candy cane chart being partly crouching.
Second, on the weight conclusions, does that take into account differing bone densities, or muscle vs body fat averages?
If not, domesticated/in captivity might be the better place to look on the latter, due to the comparative easy living of sapient beings.
While I tend to chalk some of their proportions up to art style, and downsize their head while upsizing their body, I'll concede you're probably right in the end though.
Even with the slight body boost for my proportion preferences, and even if you forgot to account for the filly crouching, the fact remains that fillyhoods can't handle the monkey D.
Oh well, I have no problem with training them as anal only, and might edit the scene later to account for how she's just too small, and this won't become part of their routine. Or even just make it anal.
At any rate, SciAnon, you're good people, keep on keeping on.
Thanks Anon, you're good people too.
It was just a small joke since I used Fluttershy as the template for the "average" stallion since the main 6 have the greatest amount of screen time so they're easy to get good pics for.
I do have a more accurate template using the withers rather than height at head allowing me to use a broader range of pictures for comparison.
I don't mind being called autistic since it is something I have been diagnosed with.
Right before after I fucking posted!
>I don't mind being called autistic since it is something I have been diagnosed with.
No no, I was making a jab at people who'd potentially see that and call you such.
Because that's one of the things that gets called it for some reason.
If you put a lot of work into something relatively unimportant, pay a lot of attention to tiny details, or just have a lot of passion for something they consider relatively or wholly unimportant, it's autism.
That is one of the problems I've solved by using the hind legs as a calculation point. The result increases foal height by about 1.5 cm.
Weight calculations are done from average density of 1 cm^3 generic flesh.
Think Dungeons and Dragons, but instead of rolling to determine your Strength and Intelligence, you roll for shit like 'Anal Circumference' and 'Linguistic Synesthesia'.
It's terrible in every way, shape or form. (It's also hideously racist and sexist but this is 4chan so nobody cares.)
Hmm, you think you could find realistic milk outputs by volume per day of ponies, dogs, and a possible projection for minotaurs (human breasted), assuming they're milked to capacity daily for at least 3 months.
I'm considering a few things.
Thanks for the info the a strong load actually would be a treat to a little filly, by the way.
>I have no problem with training them as anal only, and might edit the scene later to account for how she's just too small, and this won't become part of their routine
>edit it out
please no. I like the idea of cartoon horses being exposed to kinks and such as much as the next guy, but vaginal sex is my fetish anon!
Just chalk their vaginas being big enough up to cartoon horse magic and keep them cumming.
Thread needs more of this going on in it, with one slight tweak -
the mare in question needs to be a reluctantly submissive Celestia. Also, thread needs more slave Celestia in general
I guess I can give this whole "vaginal" thing a try, on a trial basis, of course. The things I do for my fans.
>There's not enough story that use the threat impregnation to further enslave
No, fuck you. We need broods. Mares, cows, dragonesses, love bugs and griffons who live to carry their masters children, and are damn happy for the honor.
I can help you with the Celestia part, at least.
From back in June.
>A bump in the road jostles you awake with a start.
>Shaking the surprise off, you look around.
>No more than 10 miles up the road, you see your destination. Canterlot.
>For several weeks you had been away on a diplomatic mission, and you were never more happy to almost be back home.
>And more importantly, back to your princess and favorite mare in your stable, none other than THE princess Celestia.
>As soon as you're in, you run to the throne room to greet, and inspect her.
>Throwing the large doors open, you take the royal court by surprise. Save for the princess, who meets you with a simple, respectful nod.
>"Welcome home, my king. How did your mission to the minotaur kingdom go?"
"Well enough. Though you should probably expect a few new additions to the bedroom."
>"Political marriages." she says with an eye roll and a chuckle.
"Quite. But please follow me, there are a few things I needed to iron out with you."
>Quickly excusing herself, you lead Celestia up to your shared quarters, excusing the guard as you do.
>"So what did you need to speak about, Anonymous?
>Tracing your fingers along her side, you make your way behind her.
"Nothing really, I'm just glad to be home and thought I'd inspect my girls.."
>Her tail clamps down instantly, telling you something's up.
"What's wrong Celly? You seem on edge all of a sudden."
>"Well, you see, sir."
>Impatiently, you force up her tail.
"Just what I was afraid of. An empty ponut."
>Celestia says nothing.
"We've talked about this. Royal court does not give you an excuse to not wear something. If I can't even trust my alpha mare to follow orders, how can I trust the rest?
>"Sir, I assure you there's a very good reason." She pipes up. "I needed recuperation."
>The dresser moves, revealing the hidden toy storage.
>From within floats a large bottle of lube and the largest plug you have. Easily three of four times as wide as your arm in the thickest area.
>You'd bought it largely for giggles, but had joked about using it many times.
>"I have challenged myself to use this toy, and have been using all my free time preparing these past few weeks. But I need rest afterwards."
>You don't know if she's serious, or just trying to get out of trouble, so you decide to call her bluff.
"Alright. Let's see what you can do."
>Celestia lays down, giving you a smirk that almost says "you don't know who you're fucking with" as she coats the toy and pours the thick liquid down her flank.
>After a moment, yellow light envelops the toy as she lifts it to her rear.
>With a deep breathe to relax, she begins pushing the massive object again the small black ring.
>Slowly but surely, the object begins making its way inside, the mare winking all the while.
>As Celestia finally gets it a third of the way in, she carefully rolls onto her hooves and begins using the floor to help her along.
>The normally regal princess moans and groans as the thick plug violates her rear, smelling like a mare in heat all the while.
>Finally, and much to your amazement, however, she manages to push past the flare, causing the rest of the toy to be naturally pulled into her.
>You've never seen something so amazing.
>Celestia slowly rises to her hooves, panting, winkin and leaking like a waterfall the whole time.
>You walk forward and give her a touch test, to eliminate any magical trickery.
>Sure enough, you can feel the rubber poking from her rump, the heat and moisture coming from her long neglected marehood.
>Pressing around her hips, you can even feel the thing inside her.
"Well color me impressed."
>"So...so am I...am I excused from punishment."
"Indeed. In fact, I'm going to reward you."
"Yes, I'll allow you to keep that toy for the rest of the day."
>"B..but sir! Court!"
"Your reward is not optional. Just throw on a dress."
>Knowing better than to argue, she levitates on a concealing dress before making her way back to the throne room on unsteady hooves, a light trail of soup dotting the floor along the way.
>Damn it's good to be king.
>No, fuck you. We need broods. Mares, cows, dragonesses, love bugs and griffons who live to carry their masters children, and are damn happy for the honor.
Well fucking DUH. That hit so much in my fetish.
However most of those stories happen in a very short span of time, ERA's for example, was like, a week? I want to see preg SLavelestia so much but you can't fit it everywhere unless you timeskip, but seeing her threatened, then subdued into willingly or carrying your brood would still be the best.
Hey, good work on the new stuff. I fapped myself raw to Squash Soup and its follow ups. I like your take on pone sexuality, human sexuality, and the interplay therebetween. Keep on smutting, V.
Thanks man, it means a lot. I'll keep on smutting as long as it keeps on being fun.
Speaking of, writing the next part. The guy who wanted to see sexualized etiquette training is about to get his wish.
I like the worldbuilding and exposition you're doing. The interviews and the way you're giving out information on how their families work is also something I'd consider a high point.
The scene when you had Anon asking Applebloom questions while moving the plug in and out was a really nice touch.
I'd like a little bit more explanation or reminder of exactly how Anon got to be so influential and mega-rich, though. Just a bit of worldbuilding in this angle. Something like walking by a common household item and mentioning that it was based off of the designs he's published would be good.
A list of who exactly is already in his herd, and what their roles are would be good. Before this trip, he had Applebloom, Fluttershy (who ate ham?), and I think Nurse Redheart and some nameless diplomat from the crystal empire? I've only seen 'Bloom giving an off-screen blowjob, some on-screen sexings, Fluttershy bring out breakfast, and Redheart was told to bring medical paperwork out.
Some scenes with Fluttershy, Redheard, and the diplomat would be good. How much of their prior life remains?
I also get the feeling that I'm mixing stories up.
You ever have so much to do that you just end up just taking a nap instead?
I've got 4 story lines I want to pursue (including the main story) to the point where I've got the setup to each written.
And as I stare at these four pages, contemplating each... I just kind of go play dota instead.
I really wonder sometimes...
I was asked to research milk production in mares by Vhatug. Here are the results:
Milk production in mares averages over the course of 120 days to 2.5 % of body weight.
Thus Fluttershy would produce 1,6 kg of milk each day.
Celestia would produce 2,11 kg of milk each day.
Sorry about not posting about the griffin breath holding. It seems to be complicated because while they have smaller lungs they have air sacs separate from them making me wonder if through diffusion they could compensate for the lung capacity... They're also very efficient at taking oxygen from the air. I can't say anything for certain.
Anal shouldn't be too big of a problem (this is of course just an estimate because no one has stretch trained a lion to my knowledge.)
You're getting two stories mixed up.
The Cutie Brand Crusaders are the main thing I'm working on right now, with Applebloom, Scootaloo, and Sweetie Belle being his only pets.
The story with the casual branding is an old story I reposted to keep the thread alive based on the idea "What if horse still had human programming? What if branding added submission as part of their "destiny"?".
The Celestia plug thing is an old one shot to satisfy a deep for Sublestia.
In those stories which aren't this one, Amira is the mare from Saddle Arabia, and the meat thing is from an old joke that Fluttershy sneaks from the stash she keeps for her animals, or that meat is a "sometimes" food for ponies since horses will sometimes engage in opportunistic carnivorism.
>I like the worldbuilding and exposition you're doing. The interviews and the way you're giving out information on how their families work is also something I'd consider a high point.
Thank you, I didn't want to just say "Oh, the Apple family struggles because they just suck with money!" or "Scootaloo is an orphan."
The farm just lost most of its people due to a common threat of the world, Scoots parents are alive and aren't cruel, they're just not really part of her life.
I could probably work a bit more on Anon's impact.
>The scene when you had Anon asking Applebloom questions while moving the plug in and out was a really nice touch.
It's not possible to go wrong with buttplugs, they are the greatest sex toy ever invented.
Thank you SciAnon.
By chance, is that 6 the maximum a normal mare could realistically achieve?
I mean, assuming you used constant stimulation or something to prevent them from ever ceasing production,
Actually, you might want to look into goose force feeding procedures. Might find a scaleable answer there. That's where I got the idea that Godiva should have no gag reflex, and would actually take pleasure in it (It's how chicks are fed).
Even the reviews of the system by people who say "Hey, let's review this game system. I heard it's terrible, so it should be entertaining!" say "This is just an awful game system in every sense of the word, and I hated looking at it even long enough to review it."
You know how some things are so bad that they're good again? This goes one step further and is so bad that it's irredeemably awful. It isn't B-movie bad, it's Star Wars Holiday Special bad.
maximum found in the study was at day 45 reaching 3 %
That would result in:
Fluttershy = 1,91 kg/day
Celestia = 2,53 kg/day
I'll look into it although they probably don't obscure the glottis at the base of the tongue allowing the bird to breathe. (kind of like snakes don't asphyxiate while swallowing something larger than them)
Alrighty, so a proper milkmare would produce just under a half gallon per day.
Good to know.
Thank you, man, hoers should be realistic.
>You hate it when ponies do that.
>Seeing the sour look on your face, he got a bit more serious.
>"I suppose you will just have to ask the master that yourself. Suffice it to say the castle is well stocked with maids already."
>He looks you up and down a bit.
>"Though none are quite of your…quality."
>He ignores you as you have come to the entrance to a large structure which you presume to be the main living area of the castle.
>He opens the door, and gestures for you to go in.
>You enter into the large atrium, which has a pool in the middle, with the roof right above it open to the sky.
>There are numerous doorways lining it, and the far side opens through an arcade into another garden.
>"Feel free to look around. The Master will see you shortly."
>He turned and trotted off to the other end of the atrium and out onto the arcade before turning out of view.
>The pool in the middle of the room has some benches around it, so you decide to go sit down and wait for the "human" to come and greet you.
>As you sit, the frilly and entirely too short skirt pops up, revealing the black panties Luna had made you put on.
>This whole thing is weird.
>You don't mind wearing stuff like this.
>In fact, you do it all the time.
>The girls encourage it.
>But not normally outside.
>You find yourself embarrassed, and push your claws into your lap to cover up your underwear, face blushing bright red.
>The darn thing seems to be designed to pop up and give everyone a show.
>Looking at it closer, there's a wire loop under the ruffle.
>That IS what it's for.
>Suddenly, you're feeling nervous about this.
>But Luna had specifically told you to wear this. There must be a good reason. She wouldn't do anything to pursposefully embarrass you or put you in danger.
Jesus, we've dropped to page 8 twice in under an hour now.
Have some more old bumper.
>It's been several months since you were dropped into this crazy world.
>And it's the greatest thing that's ever happened to you.
>You'd been dropped into a city called New Horseleans a large city of mostly zebra, gryphons, and earth ponies.
>It was a wonderful place. Good food, good people, good culture, and good parties.
>But it just wasn't for you. Too much hustle and bustle for your taste.
>Besides, there was a whole new world to explore, and you saw no reason to just sit in that one place.
>So packing some of your meager possessions and some gear, you took off along the coast, intent on seeing what the world had to offer.
>Which brought you to the present.
>After several weeks of travel, town through town, you eventually came across a place that you simply couldn't bring yourself to leave.
>It was a small, well hidden village without a name, inhabited by small creatures that looked like a mix between cats and rabbits.
>You'd seen mentions of them in books on the species of the world. Isolated, but sweet to a fault. Some scholars even believed they might be incapable of anger or aggression.
>Lucky for them, they bred and grew fast. You can't imagine how they could have survived otherwise given your own experiences.
>Books called them "The Cute Citizens of Wuvy-Dovey Land", they called themselves "The Wuvlanders", you just called them cabbits.
>They quickly took to calling themselves cabbits in your honor.
>The guy who said power corrupts may have been onto something. You didn't just run this place, you lorded over it.
>Or maybe you're just a naturally controlling person.
>Either way, you scheduled their days, picked their mates, decided how they could and couldn't spend their free time, and demanded tribute.
>And they LOVED you for it, complying happily to your every demand. It was insane! Wonderful! And a little creepy.
>It's an average day for you.
>Simply lazing about on a lounger admist all the little den of excess you've built in the town square.
>The small creatures hop too and fro as they go about their day.
>Whenever one comes close by, they drop something, anything in your pile of loot.
>It was often something as simple as a macaroni heart, but occassionaly things like gold or gems found their way there.
>While you could just walk, or crawl really, into any store here and take what you pleased, it was still nice to have.
>Besides, you occassionally took a trip to nearby towns to trade for things your simple pets couldn't provide.
>Polishing off your glass of whiskey, you set it aside and whistle for some attention.
>Every cabbit in the area looks your way, with the nearest does dropping everything they're doing to see to your needs.
>Four of them hop into your lap and compete for positions.
>The winner of the front position is a fuzzy pink one with one of those hearts on her chest some of them have, and some nice breeder hips.
>Two of the others take place at the sides.
>The last crawls under the front and places her paws on your sack.
"Alright girls..." You say as you prepare their cue.
>In your hand is an enchanted stone, magically linked to other small enchanted objects.
>Every female in the village wore at least one in each hole. Tiny dildos, buttplugs, anal beads, egg vibrators. Whatever you felt like.
>Squeezing the stone, it links to your intent and begins glowing.
>"Get to work."
>A cacophony of moans fills the village air as each and every does toys flashes to life with a random effect.
>Some get very warm, some get very cold, some emit small electric shocks, and some simply vibrate. A few even pulse and throb as if they're living things.
>It's odd, but you want all your pets to be aware of your status. And you've yet to have a single complaint, not even from husbands and fathers.
>The fuzzballs try their hardest to ignore their own pleasure, and focus entirely on you.
>Soft pads and tongues work your shaft and sack, taking great cares to ensure you're happy.
>The one on the end suckles you, paws right behind your cock head.
>You lean back and relax, simply enjoying the moment.
>The town full of loyal slaves, the moan filled air, the smell of excitement, the shaft work, the gentle ball massaging, the tiny tongue flicking your urethra.
>It's all just so perfect.
>Several minutes later, you feel yourself reaching your edge.
>Your pets seem to sense this and the one previously suckling your rod jumps back as the others work to milk you.
>She sits there, hands on those big hips, mouth open, those little buck teeth making the whole display a little cuter than it should be.
>Your seed explodes across her face as she moves her head about in an attempt to catch as much as possible in her mouth.
>She does a good job of it too, because she fills her mouth, leaving it running down her chest.
>The four of them sit on your legs, awaiting for further orders.
"That was pretty good whatever your names are, y-"
>"My name is-"
"I don't care. You may all go now."
>They bow, spout an "I love you." and hop down as you deactivate the magical link, giving the town a little relief.
>Watching them, you see wide hips run over to a male and child, who wave and go about their day, ignoring her plastered face.
>Reaching around, you pick up a list of issues the "Mayor" dropped off earlier, so that you could decide how best to proceed.
>The largest is that the population is getting larger, and they want to build more houses.
>You decide against it. The isolated small town feel is simply too nice.
>You figure you can put it off for a while by selling some of them. To changelings if need be.
>It's highly unlikely they'll complain no matter what you do. But that's a problem for later.
>Stretching, you get comfortable and settle in for a nap.
Y'all fuckers need to step it up and keep this shit alive.
God Damn, Vhatug seems to be the king of one-shots. It's hard to make a story so short, yet so complete and sexy.
Also, you just brought a new sexy species to my attention. I don't know when I will get to them, but I will. Before God I swear this creed: until there is no more sexy, but peace, and then...
Generally, if I'm trying to write something larger than a one shot, especially if it tries to be realistic or grounded, that stories subject is my current favorite.
The answer to both right now is Applebloom, with Sweetie a close second.
Used to be Flutters, then Lyra and Applejack, though I never wrote a multiparter about AJ.
Glad you like it. They will never stop their journey till master gives them their cutie brands.
hey, it's sweet cheeks the cabbit who's got back
Yes, yes I know I said I was going to write 2 weeks ago. And I didn't. Writing is weird for me, takes me seeing something or hearing something or feeling something to jump start me into it.
And that just happened. >>20080660
Expect some green tonight or tomorrow.
Hey, ya gotta break for monster booty.
Imagine a home built on encasement. Almost everything is made of girls of varying species permanently bound up as fixtures. Even the home's foundation is a thick stack of mares locked into thick steel chests. Imagine what's going through a mares mind as the last binds and blindfold go on, as her box is sealed and slid into the wall with many others like her, now unaging and undying. Her function is thankless, her name quickly forgotten. But even as her mind utterly dissolves under the weight of endless orgasm denial and sensory deprivation supplemented by a steady stream of aphrodisiacs, her final coherent thought is how happy she is to be serving her master.
Glad I'm not the only one who gets his rocks off on human/pone size disparity. Add in some
GLORIOUS HUMAN STAMINAas well, and you've got a reciepe for sore wrists and blow out rotator cuffs.
What kind of faggot WOULDN'T enjoy these?
There's just something so great about dominating something a lot smaller than you, making it yours, making it love you, ruining it for its own kind.
>What kind of faggot WOULDN'T enjoy these?
>There's just something so great about dominating something a lot smaller than you, making it yours, making it love you, ruining it for its own kind.
Holy fuck, are you my id? Have you written anything along those lines other than the current story?
>So you might wanna poke around my bin a bit.
You don't have to ask me twice *winkie face*
get on the bed and remove pants
Just how little are your Little Ponies in that head-canon of yours, Anon? Do you prefer the ponies body proportions according to the show, or something different?
For frame of reference, I'm 6'3". For size, I imagine adult ponies heads coming up to belly button level. For proportions, I imagine bodies that don't exhibit neoteny, the moe/chibi look of the cartoon, and look more like >pic related
Better version of that. Former picture was for ants.
Assuming a normal 5,10 male, adults would be about crotch height. Fillies, about knee high. And alicorns, just under 5 feet.
For proportions, something like this >>20068380
Their heads are sized down to a believable size, their body a tad bigger.
I don't really understand the appeal of something as small as moth ponies. They're too small to stick your dick in.
Also, I know I've seen that font on the "moth noises" text before, but I can't remember where, and it's bugging me.
>Not exhibiting neoteny
Her eyes are bigger than her head, dude. Must be using some kind of space warping magic for them to fit.
Kind of like my dick.
Also, nice encasement fetish. Remember reading a story about a women who met a dom about fulfilling such a fetish of hers. It was like a two year process of warping her body, where she was continuously gagged so she wasn't able to talk until he removed the gag for a few moments before fitting in her breathing tube, and she begged him to stop, that she didn't want to do it, but he showed her the contract she signed and forced her in anyways. Long story short she spent the rest of her life encased in concrete with another slave tasked with feeding her through an electronic interface (and also teasing the fuck out of her cunt and ass).
>They're too small to stick your dick in.
That's what they thought about fillies. We proved them wrong, didn't we?
Encasement stuff is very hard to find. I've only seen a few.
One was where this guy like to encase animals to make it super realistic, then break them out (dumb, I know, an animal would never sit still for that), when this girl claiming to have a terminal disease comes up and begs to be encased. She gets everything in order, leaves notes to her family that they won't see her again, and insists that they guy doesn't release her as long as she lives, or give her a line of communication.
Later he looks up her disease, and muses how none of her symptoms match.
There was another where this woman was encased and buried alive with only breathing and feeding tubes as lifelines because she'd done something to piss off her mistress really bad, and was assured she'd never release her.
Later, a different slave with a connection to the first earns a favor from her mistress and brings her up, but instead of releasing her friend, she has herself encased with her, and concrete poured the coffin to really seal it, so her mistress couldn't be called a liar.
Maybe, she posted for a long time till she disappeared last year.
I seriously doubt she would be dumb enough to actually go through with her "lobotomy and boxed for life" fetish, but I could see a two week stint of encasement.
I like ponies being around the same size and volume as several different dog breeds; something similar to the ratio and proportions (>>20081995) proposes, but adjusted to my own height.
Practically speaking, Celestia would be around the height as the largest dog breeds, so that her volume be equal or somewhat smaller to an average human male, while other princesses and the largest male ponies like Big Mac reaching around the hip, while regular stallions find themselves just under crotch level and mares just a bit lower. Fillies would go from there to foals, who are around the same size of a football ball.
>Could you use a male dinosaur's/large reptile's cloaca like a vagina?
Isn't Spike a male?
She was actually into some weird shit.
Laser removal of all body hair, having her arms permanently bound in a reverse prayer position to the back of her collar, a ring surgically attached to her anus that keeps it open and in her own words "leaves her no control over what goes in and out, and finally a lobotomy and permanent encasement whenever she got "too old and her master got a younger slave".
I need all the sauce on this. Immediately. You have no idea how bad the erection you gave me is.
You know I've been disgusted and horrified by some of the things on this board. I've also been aroused by a great many new things on this board. I have never been simultaneously horrified, disgusted, and aroused until I read that. Please for the love of god don't write a story like that I don't want to have that fetish.
Of course, it's being written now.
By the way, I assume you guys are okay with classical unicorns?
I can't promise that.
I want to make sweet, tender, consensual love to every single mare in Equestria,
and I want them to hate loving every single second of it.
By classical unicorn do you mean normal unicorns, unicorns that listen/play classical music, or unicorns in mythology that only appear to maidens that have not lost their purity?
I mean long articulate tails, cloven hooves, and poofy fetlocks.
There's no reason ponies can't do pony play.
I remember this chick, I used to follow her blog. Got tired of how much she promoted Wasteland. Don't get me wrong, it's a legit site, but it seemed like every post ended with links to that place.
She really was obsessed with being shelved though, and given the personal problems she had as a youth, I wouldn't be surprised if she went through with it in time.
Also, great to have you aboard, my esteemed sir.
>There's no reason ponies can't do pony play.
Wouldn't than be like humans being into human play? Unless ponies themselves consider themselves midget beasts of burden to be tamed and owned, of course.
>Unless ponies themselves consider themselves midget beasts of burden to be tamed and owned, of course.
Have you ever noticed that ponies seem at least vaguely aware of the place of equines, and simultaneously embrace and are embarrassed of it?
>You are deep in the archive section of your library, examining the book Celestia had requested.
>Honestly, you couldn't care less about it. You'd flipped through it once, but it was filled with nothing but gibberish, numbers, and diagrams.
>A few of them glowed when you touched them though.
>That was pretty cool.
>You had sourced most of your rare book collection from various back alley shops, but this one was a part of the hoard of a particularly strange dragon you had fought. Unlike most of the dragons you had encountered, this one hoarded books, scrolls, and arcane writings rather than gold and jewels.
>She had also put up a hell of a fight, fighting you and your group to a draw.
>So you had tried a different tack.
>"Master Anonymous, your new, eherm, MAID has arrived."
>You slam the old tome shut and turned to face your loyal stallionservant.
"Wonderful, thank you Tail Coat. Where is he?"
>"Awaiting Master's presence in the Atrium, I believe."
"And how does he seem?"
>"A bit nervous, I believe, but he seems quite comfortable in women's clothing, though perhaps not so much in the getup master requested."
>Good. No, not good. Perfect.
>This will be the first time you've had a male indentured servant. So far, it sounds like he is acting almost exactly like almost all the mares you have kept in the past.
>You start the long walk to the atrium, lost in thought.
>It had been several years since you first arrived in Equestria, the strange pony land so filled with kindness and friendship, yet also home to so many extraordinary dangers.
>Yours had been a life of adventure. You had always been a bit of an adventurer, keeping fit, mountainclimbing, exploring jungles, going for months without the sight of civilization, living off the land.
>Then, while exploring a jungle in Honduras, you came across an apparently undiscovered ruined city, inexplicably filled with images of unicorns and pegasii. And at the top of the heavily overgrown central pyramid, the temple. At the sight of them, your native companions had fled.
>And inside the temple, the mirror, which sat, seemingly untouched by time.
>And then here.
>You had made friends, and enemies, and amassed a great fortune, earring the favor of the rulers of this place, and even bedded them.
>Ah, and the sex. The sex was the best. So many wonders in this world.
>But for the longest time, your favorite fetish went unfulfilled. Slavery was illegal.
>You finally figured a way around that though, with a concept from Earth's not-too-distant past. Indentured servitude. Slavery with a set end date. and a big payout for the slave.
>This particular case was even better.
>This one was almost like a punishment.
>That really gets your rocks off.
>And punish him you will, for at least the next eight months, twice as long as your next longest term of service thus far from a young mare looking to live the easy life.
>Heh, that one would be back before too long. She would almost certainly fritter the money away within a year or two, and you planned to pick up with her right where you had left off.
>Your thoughts scattered from your head as you finally reached the atrium.
>No crossdressing dragon in sight.
>Perhaps he had wandered off after Tail had left off observing him to come and get you?
>You walk around the front of the rain cistern.
>There he is, sitting quietly waiting for you to greet him.
>What a good little dragon.
>You will have to thank Twilight for training him so well.
"Hello, little dragon."
>He jerks his head up, nose and cheeks blushed rouge.
"Been thinking naughty thoughts, have we?"
Turns out (once again) that what I researched went somewhere completely different from what I expected.
The lizard cloaca is vastly different from the equivalent in birds. I don't think you can realistically shove something the size of a human penis into it.
At least not without Baykdoyre’s Ultimate Lubrication.
Well, I think that birds are more closely related to dinosaurs than lizards are. Any info specifically on dino cloacas? Especially in species similar to spike, like the Trex or Velociraptor?
I highly doubt I'll be able to find any data on the reproductive system of something we don't even have a complete DNA sequence for... But I'll try. By the gods my shota dragon porn must be anatomically correct!
There's pretty much nothing about the reproductive orifices of T. rex. You should probably just go with cloaca=anus. The incompatibility is pretty big as you would be literally shoving your dick into the ureter/urinary bladder filled with a caustic sludge.
I'm not sure about the system used in the hemipenes (as in are they hollow? how are they pushed out? could you stick a dick in there?) I might find something more later but for now no hemipenes inverted or otherwise
Sentenced to 500 years of orgasm denial.
>Have you ever noticed that ponies seem at least vaguely aware of the place of equines, and simultaneously embrace and are embarrassed of it?
That's an interesting observation. You plan on doing anything with it?
You mean I haven't been?
I'm not really into highly anatomically correct horse, but that image is adorable. It's pretty much what I picture in my head when I'm reading something with accurate anatomy horse, too.
>He doesn't like anatomically correct horse
Eh, you do or you don't. But it is adorable.
Also, for those interested, the next cmc chapter will be within a few hours tops.
>“Scootaloo no! Don’t mess with that!”
>”Sweetie! Ya tryin ta get us both in trouble?”
>Looking over the room with a sigh, you see the damage.
>Several attempts at water purification, ruined. A stack of books on your own magitech theories, scattered everywhere.
>Containing your anger, you scoop up the two fillies who squirm in your grasp, and begin marching up to your room, Applebloom following close behind.
>Plopping the two on your bed, you order them all to stay put while you do some thinking. Alone.
>It’s been a few days since you brought these two new fillies here.
>While they’re adjusting well thanks to their friend’s support and encouragement, they do a good job of exciting each other.
>This has proven...problematic.
>But you don’t regret it. When they’re not causing trouble, Applebloom is at the happiest you’ve yet seen her.
>And their training is starting to take, especially with Bloom playing your little advocate.
>All said, they’re getting the same treatment she did.
>The fillies are introduced to modern hygiene, making an incredible change.
>Especially Scootaloo, who went from dirty by contemporary standards, to something that could almost pass as a noble within the course of the week.
>Hair cuts and silver hoof cups for both.
>Sweetie’s being modified for her cloven unicorn hooves and having a thin gold plating to contrast her fur.
>They’re introduced to small plugs, the structured Sweetie taking to it better than wild child Scootaloo.
>You’ve taken to using Applebloom while they’re made to watch, lavishing extra pleasure on her to build an association.
>And of course, random, meaningless orders slipped casually into idle conversations help lay the foundation for a strong “obey before you think” mentality.
>A growing concern however, is that maybe Applebloom just isn’t ready to assume the responsibilities of being an alpha mare.
>While it seems she was already more or less their leader as friends, at best she can nudge them a bit in one direction.
>Occasionally get them thinking something she wants was their idea.
>But when it comes down to it, they won’t listen to any outright instructions from her. So she’s really not able to reign the other two in once they’re set on something.
>Groaning again, you slump against the wall to contemplate your options.
“Now look whatcha done! You two upset ‘im.”
>”Ugh, who cares? I just wanna play and run around, not do all...this!” Scootaloo claims while waving her arms
“Well ya need ta get use to it.Yer a herd filly now. An owned herd filly.”
>”Pfft, you used to be fun, Applebloom. Now you’re all just “master this” and “master that”.”
“What! Ah’m fun. Ah jus-
>”Scootaloo does sort of have a point, Applebloom. I know he bought us and all, but you do kinda stay under him all the time.”
“Well yeah but...isn’t that kinda what owned mares are supposta do?”
>”I suppose so…”
>”I heard owned mares get beat a lot.”
>Now that just isn’t true!
“Well Ah’ve never been beat. Spanked maybe” you cough out. “But never beat.”
>”I’m getting tired of wearing this thing too” Scootaloo says, hinting at her flank.
“Oh THAT thing? Pfft. A few more days, ya won’t even notice it’s there. A week or two and you’ll wonder how ya went without it.”
>”I kind of like it.”
“Sweetie likes it!”
>”You’re both weird.”
>She’s cracking, you can feel it!
“Well look here Scootaloo, ya got food, ya got a big house, ya got the best toys, ya got friends, and ya got in a real nice herd. What more ya want?”
>Time to move in for the kill!
“So what if he bought ya? Just means that if ya listen to ‘im, he’s stuck with ya forever.
>”Eh whatever” she says, trying to play off a tiny smirk she couldn’t stop.
>She tried to hide it. But it happened! And you saw it.
>Before you can say anything though, there door opens up and Master comes in!
>You don’t know whether you should be excited or worried, so you just wait…
“Alright girls. I’ve decided what we’re going to do.”
>”What?” The three say in unison, except Applebloom who tacks a “master” to the end.
“I’m going to take you three on a picnic.”
>All three look at you quizzically, before Scootaloo approaches.
>”What’s your game, we break you stuff and you take us on a picnic? What’s your game?”
“I’m glad you asked Scoots.” you say as you sweep the lightweight pony into your arms.
“I just think that maybe all you guys really need is to feel...comfortable, to feel welcome.”
>”There’s a catch here, isn’t there?”
“Very astute, Sweetie. I’m going to be teaching you girls some basic manners. When you do right you’ll get a reward. When you do wrong too many times, you’ll get a hit from the crop.”
>”Pfft, figures.” Scootaloo whines, her legs hanging limp beneath her.
>A while later, you’re at the park and setting up, your seat a simple table that you threw a cloth over.
>Luckily, you found an area where just enough of a break in the trees allowed in some real sunlight. They seemed to like that.
>It’s a simple meal compared to home, but for a species of herbivores in a developing world, it’s a decent spread for a picnic.
>Fresh hay, oats, a few types of fruits and vegetables, a kettle of piping hot tea, and sugarcubes for rewards.
>Since the idea is to enforce dominance and control in an otherwise pleasant environment, you opted not to bring and this time.
“Scootaloo, we talked about chewing before we swallowed. Present your flanks”
“Applebloom, I’ve told you about five times now to not talk with your mouth full. Present your flanks.
“Sweetie, how many times now have you shoved your face in your tea like that? Present your flanks.
>The three turn in their seats, moving their sides to where they may be discretely whipped from under the table.
>Three pops and three muffled eeps are heard before they allowed go back to eating.
>The rules you were teaching them weren’t the same ones their own high society.
>Rather, they were closer to middle class human rules, modified for horses, sense and sanitary concerns.
>No 50 forks bullshit or slobbering all over everything.
“Sweetie, don’t put your mouth in the bowls other people have to eat out of.” You say as you scoop some grains onto her plate. “That’s one strike.”
>”Uh, Anon, will you pass me a pear?”
“Will I pass you a pear, please. Remember your “pleases and thank yous”. And yes, Scoots.” You say as you hand one to the filly.
“Thank you, Anon..” she says unsurely.
>She’s learning. Taking a sugarcube in hand, you present it to the little pony.
>Knowing the way this works already, the pony eats the treat from the palm of your hand as you pet her neck.
>You should probably look into pegasi specific care.
>While her wings look fine, the downy feathers that creep partially across her back, chest and neck still leave something to be desired.
>Maybe once she molts?
>The meal continues for a while until, in a fit of boredom, you decide to give Applebloom a test.
>As soon as one of the fillies has gotten enough strikes to receive a pop from the crop, you put it into action.
“Ah dang. I dropped my crop. Applebloom, could you get under there and find it for me?”
>She doesn’t even hesitate.
>Master just gave you an important job. You’ve gotta find the crop so he can keep teaching everyone.
>Sweetie’s learning, Scoots is learning, even you’re learning.
>Now if only it wasn’t so dark under here.
>As you’re rooting around, you accidentally bump into Master’s legs.
>That’s when you see it. He’s got his parts hanging out like a normal stallion.
>Before you can think about it, Master grabs you by the mane and pulls you gently between his legs.
>Is that what he really wanted? Out here? In the park?
>Taking a nervous gulp, you look around to make sure nobody could see under the blanket.
>Once you’re sure, you calm down and basically inhale it, taking the whole thing in one go.
>This is a way better treat than a little sugar, so you must have been really good.
>Ah, now that’s living.
>The oddest part is that you’re not sure which of you enjoys it more. She’s always been eager about blowjobs.
>”Mr. Anon, is something wrong? You keep making little grunts.”
“It’s nothing girls.”
>They clearly don’t believe you, and it doesn’t take them long to connect it to the absentee crusader, causing the two to both check under the blanket.
>The red faced fillies sit in silence for a few moments before you instruct otherwise.
“Alright girls, get back to your meals. Be thankful, and don’t waste food.”
>You continue teaching the girls, you blow your load, and everyone finishes eating.
>Finally, the meal is over and you pack everything up before excusing the girls to play.
>As they play however, you’re approached by a stranger. A pegasus stallion with a dusty tan coat and a white mane.
>”Hello there, you’re Anonymous I assume?”
>An out of towner it seems, he lacks that certain Cajun-esque accent of the area.
“That would be me. What can I help you with, mr…?”
>”Lightning Chase. I was in town on business, and well, when I saw you with those beautiful little angels in tow, I just got a hankering to expand my harem.”
>”Well, I asked around a bit, and it word seems to be that you own them, and that at least one is very well trained. I want to buy one of them.”
“I’m afraid they’re not for sale, sir.” You curtly reply.
>”Now now now. At least hear my offer, I’ll-”
“Excuse me for a moment.”
“GIRLS! LINE UP!”
>The three of them quickly make their way to your side, some a little more quickly than others.
“Girls, this is Mr. Lightning Chase. Say hi.”
>”Hi Mr. Lightning Chase.”
“Now, it seems that he finds you three really pretty, and wants to buy one of you from me for his own harem. How do you girls feel about that?”
>”Please don’t sell us, Master!” blurts Applebloom, clutching to your leg.
>”But, I was just getting comfortable…” Sweetie claims fearfully, backing up a couple of steps.
>”You can’t be serious!” Scootaloo says with a mix of worry and exasperation.
“It seems they’ve made their feelings known. My girls are not for sale.”
>He coughs as he tries to regain his composure.
>”I would be willing to pay 9 gold bits for your least favorite of the three.”
“I payed more more than that for the least expensive one.”
>”Yes, but such a...savvy business colt must know that a deflowered mare is less valuable.”
“You make too many assumptions.”
>”Fine, humor me. How much would it take?”
>Mocking up a thinking face, you watch the nervous crusaders from the corner of your eyes
“Well, let’s see. Between my initial buying price, a recoup for my expenses of care, emotional compensation for my poor heart loosing it’s favorite fillies in the whole world.
“The price of their belongings, the bonus of the ones who are virginally intact, their good looks, current background, and skills and education they’ve received with me….”
“Oh, and they’re basically connected at the haunch, so you have to buy all three. I’d say….about 350 gold for the lot of them.”
>Everyone around seems to almost choke on the air.
>”Th..that’s absurd! It would take me decades to get that kind of money!”
“It’s also a moot point. They are NOT for sale. Now I would appreciate it if you left before I get the guard involved.”
>The stallion finally gets the point and storms off in a huff.
>When he’s finally out of sight, you turn to the fillies.
“Sorry about this girls, but I think it’s time we went home.”
>”Mister Anon?” Starts an uneasy Scootaloo. “Do you really think we’re worth that much?”
>With a smile, you scoop all three of the tykes into a hug.
“You’re worth way more to me. Don’t any of you ever doubt it.
>The three of them nuzzle in response to that.
“Now Sweetie, Scoots, I know you aren’t fans, but I’m going to leash you on the way home just to be safe.”
>”O..okay sir.” they say with almost appreciative nods.
>On the way back you give them a few minutes to get candy from a market stall as a reward, while you talk to a guard about sending an extra patrol or two near your property for the next few nights.
And there's part four.
Now open to ideas, fetish or story, that people would like to see.
Meat, Anon opted not to bring meat because it might make tiny prey creatures more nervous.
Now with picture
Seen that one, it's very unf~
Discounting that Trixie short written solely out of my displeasure for Trixiefags, I would like to write some actual encasement stuff. Short term, done in trust, written to be serious type of thing.
Alright, well I'm going to bed. Please don't forget that I'm looking for ideas for the next chapter, sexual and not.
Anon has a very particular set of skills, skills he has acquired over a very long career. Skills that make him a nightmare to ponies like Lightning Chase. If Lightning Chase doesn’t pursue the fillies, that'll be the end of it. Anon will not look for him, Anon will not pursue him. But if he doesn’t, Anon will look for him, Anon will find him, and Anon will kill him.
>for the next chapter, sexual
Lots of oral play. Anon getting Bloom to step in as the alpha. Bloom asserting herself as the alpha, with Sweetie falling in line. Bloom supervising Sweeties first blowjob. Scoots doesn't join in, and gets jealous of the others having fun without her.
Lots of comments by the fillies on how big Anon is, and how good he tastes.
Checking in again. Sorry for not posting any Octavia recently, I know I've been saying that I would, and I do have almost an entire scene completed. I simply couldn't convince myself of the story, and might do a mini-rewrite on how it ends.
On a up-note, I decided to write another NMM one-shot. (She is really entertaining to write.) It's probably the most mello story I've written so far. No gore, violence, or even real domination to be find. Just a simple slice of life story, although it has some... interesting undertones. You might see it tonight.
If it was done right, I wouldn't mind. I'm a Sunbro, but I liked Survival Anon and that version of Celestia was horrible. Not poorly written, but it was Tyrantlestia. The M6 in it, save for
RD, were equally horrible. But it was well done and made for an interesting story.
Alternate character interpretations can be fun, so long as they aren't poorly executed.
>You are Nightmare Moon
>Empress of the Equestrian Empire.
>You are in the royal kitchen, alone.
>It’s well into the time that was formerly mid-day.
>The castle chefs have all returned to their quarters.
>You stand over a batch of cookie dough, slowly mixing it to ensure the proper texture.
>After mixing the batter to the perfect consistency, you slowly place it onto a tray, and then into the already heated oven.
>After the oven clicks shut, and setting the small timer onto a nearby table, you peek through the thin layer of glass separating you from the soft fire inside.
>Everything is perfect.
>Yet you are still nervous.
>You step back from the oven, before laying down onto the cold marble floor.
>You gaze at the flames dancing inside the stove, and begin to think.
>It’s not often that you have time to yourself like this.
>Over the past year you’ve had so many meetings to attend, so many rebellions to quell, so many traitors to… dispose of.
>You’ve barely had time to explore and embrace the things that you- that you and Luna used to enjoy.
>You close your eyes, and simply listen to the fire echo of the walls around you.
>It’s so peaceful.
>A smile creeps upon your face.
>Your the Empress of the most powerful nation on the planet, yet you find pleasure in simply baking a batch of cookies.
>That’s not entirely true.
>It’s not simply about baking cookies.
>It has a meaning much, much deeper than that.
>The smile slips off your face.
>You remember the why you… why Luna got so good at baking cookies in the first place.
>It was centuries ago.
>More particularly, it was the years directly following Celestia and Luna’s rise to power.
>They- you were both still young, wide-eyed rulers to a small, growing country.
>The original castle had only just been completed a few months prior, and you were still getting accustomed to the changes.
>A small city began to develop in the shadow of the castle, and soon, it became the largest settlement in Equestria.
>As the first few years slipped by, it became apparent that the Castle was in need of a more formal security force.
>While no pony ever attempted to intentionally harm the castle, you or your sister, their was the occasional accident.
>Foals would accidentally kick a ball into the gardens, and trample Celestia’s favorite flowers.
>Lovers would try and find quite along your favorite paths around the castle.
>After a brief discussion, it was decided that you and Celestia would create a formal guard.
>Both of you interviewed a variety of ponies to become the first Captain of the Guard.
>Hundreds of strong, able-bodied stallions applied.
>The interviews dragged on for months, until you and Celestia found a pony that you deemed fitting for the job.
>You both agreed that he was the most capable of all the applicants, and so, he received his commission.
>Both you and Celestia knighted him, as both the first Solar and Lunar Knight.
>After a few weeks, he was successfully able to expand the guard to several dozen ponies, and under his leadership, they were able to successfully defend the castle from local mischief.
>Secretly however, his ability to serve as a guard was only one reason for his selection.
>You dare say that you find him… quite attractive.
>He was a strong stallion, with broad shoulders and strong muscles.
>As the weeks went by, you began to think about him more and more.
>After much thought, you came to an… interesting conclusion.
>Perhaps… perhaps you liked him… a lot.
>One night, you expressed you feelings to Celestia, who only chuckled, and teased you about your… interest.
>She said that you didn’t have any experience with stallions, and didn’t know what they liked.
>You were upset.
>Of all ponies, you thought that she would take you seriously.
>She was your sister after all.
>That night, you went to bed crying.
>What did she mean you didn’t know anything about stallions?
>There isn’t that much to know.
>They're ponies just like every pony else.
>And what did she mean that you don’t “know what they like?”
>The like what every pony likes!
>It bothered you.
>It wasn’t her words that troubled you so much.
>Her tone was… condescending.
>Like she thought your feelings didn’t matter.
>You did’t let that stop you though, it only motivated you.
>You were going to show Celestia that you weren’t some sort of foal.
>That your feelings mattered…
That seems like a natural break in the story, so Ill leave it there for now. I might post more tonight, but I have decided.
The story is already complete, so there isn't really a need for suggestions. I literally started this last night and finished it just now. It flowed from very well to paper, so I finished it.
>Q for 4chan.
Is ther a way to add a proper title to a post? I remember seeing people with colored tiles for their grentext, but I'm not sure how it's done. If you know that would be awesome.
More Cookies and Milk to come.
Moot killed the post subject field. Subjects are only possible for the OP, which starts a thread. You get a name field, an options field (noko, sage, etc), and your post content field now; that's it.
Yep, a very slow day.
I'm liking how this sounds.
But Anon, they're just fillies! They're not old enough to carry and endless stream o Anon's half-breed children yet!
So they can.
Maybe run them through some excersizes in submission making them sit on the floor during dinner and only feeding them scraps afterwords... by hand. Maybe make it as a punishment for Scoots acting up
Also I know I'm late for it but this is a damn good story man
Alright, I think I can work all 3 of these in.
And I've figured out what to do for the setting and story.
Thanks guys, I'll get start here shortly.
It's never too late, man. I'm just glad people are enjoying it. Not often I can write with this kind of momentum.
That seems like a bad idea unless he's got a guard posted out there to keep an eye out for filly-snatchers.
"Oh yes, she's worth a stupid amount of money but she's not for sale. Be in awe of how wonderful they are. Now I must put them outside and not safe inside my home where someone couldn't just steal them away."
Goddammit, well I hope you find a workaround for that later on.
>enslave the mares
>Use them to breed an army of satyrs
>use your children to conquer equestria
>Annihilate the pony race.
Shh, it's just a catch all term for the pussyfruit of Anon's many conquests.
Centaurs are weird and gross, and they already exist in FiM in the form of Tirek, who looks nothing like a human. Satyrs are a more logical form for a human-pony baby to take, since it doesn't multiply the number of limbs for no reason.
But a Satyr is literally only a half human half goat. If they were half human hallf horse and were bipedal it wouldn't be a satyr it would be some non-mythological creature with a different made up name.
According to Wiki, satyrs are Greek and just refer to general equines, while fauns are from the Romans and are specifically half-goat.
I'm too lazy to look up actual sources, but there you go.
What I am about to post is completely speculative since no living interspecies offspring exist between horses and humans. A human/pony hybrid would most probably have differing lower torso and legs based on gender. Females would have a centaurs physiology due to not being influenced by the Y chromosome while male offspring would have satyr features. This is based on the general effects of the Y chromosome overriding the existing X chromosomal effects found in the pony.
>What I am about to post is completely speculative since no living interspecies offspring exist between horses and humans.
You sure about that?
Really mundane submission stuff, like reading a book while lying down and using one as a pillow, another as a footrest, and a third for... a cupholder or something.
How about a bit of breathplay, or a verbal back-and-forth training session on their new positions in life?
I think it might be interesting if you can find a way to mix the really, really mundane things with the more extreme stuff at the same time.
Okey yeah thats a good place to draw the line, any breathplay less than that I don't really mind.
Not my fetish, but thats okey if you like it Anon.
I like mind games and sexual that both parties end up enjoying.
Not "I only enjoy this because master enjoys this and I live to make master happy" more like "I didn't like it at first even though it felt good but now I love it and have come to accept it as purely a good thing"
I think I know a way to slip some of this in.
The first is an admirable trait for a pet, but it certainly is better for serious stories when they learn to enjoy it themselves.
Though, for a more believable blend, you should have them learn to enjoy most of it, but there always be one or two things they never come to enjoy, but tolerate for their master, because they enjoy the whole a lot more than they hate those parts.
Alright, this is technically a half chapter, but I need to go do something instead of sleeping so I might be offline longer than normal.
“Alright Sweetie! You managed to get it a couple inches off the ground!”
>”Th..thank you sir! I..I think that’s better, right?” the exhausted filly pants, her horn still releasing green sparks of arcane energy.
>Laughing, you give her a pat on the head, which you use as an opportunity to “accidentally” brush against her still charged horn, earning you an adorable “mmph”.
>It tingles in your touch, and seems to send a jolt down her spine.
“Indeed it is, Sweetie. Keep practicing, and I’m sure you’ll be lobbing spells in no time.”
>Wordlessly nodding, she starts charging up to go again.
“Hey Scoots” you say as you turn to the couch. “You’ve had your snout in the book for the last two hours. You sure you wouldn’t like me to teach you to, you know, read?”
>The orange pegasus, clearly realizing she’s been had slinks out of the room, refusing to speak or make eye contact.
>”Wow, what’s her problem?”
>”I don’t understand, sir.”
“As I’m to understand, she generally didn’t have much guidance. Her parents struck me as somewhere between disinterested and unsure how to cope with her.”
“I’d guess she doesn’t much care for authority in her life.”
>”Oh. What are you gonna do with her?”
“Well…” you begin as you pet the filly. “First, I’m not going to feed the behavior. I’m going to show her that actions have consequences, good or bad, and that I’m not going away.”
“She just needs structure and consistency. I’m sure she’ll come around.”
>It seems about right.
>The week or so after you bought her, she was often disinterested, defiant and sometimes angry.
>Since your run in with the creepy stallion last week, she shifted into an almost confused state.
>She avoided you, or acted like you weren’t there when you weren’t making her do something.
>And while she didn’t disobey most of the time, or do much talking back, should couldn’t seem to muster up any enthusiasm either, and could rarely look you in the eyes.
>You’ve tolerated it up till now, but it’s about time to lay down the law with her.
>”DINNER’S READY Y’ALL!”
>In a little while.
>Everyone files into the room to eat.
>The spread before you is...interesting.
>Crude fruit pastes, chopped grasses, a watery looking vegetable soup, and an overcooked steak for you.
>Well, it is the first time you let her cook by herself, so it could have been much worse.
>They don’t seem to mind at least.
>As you saw through the charcoal on your plate, Scootaloo finally makes her way in.
>As usual, she makes a plate, then immediately tries to leave take it to the spare room with her.
“Uh uh, Scoots. New rules. From now on we don’t take food outside the kitchen.”
>”I’ll just eat later, then.” she claims as she goes to put the food back.
“No no, we eat when it’s time to eat. Come to the table or wait till breakfast.”
>She briefly looks to the large dining table reserved for guests and special occasions, but knows you won’t allow it, and takes a seat beside you at the small 4 person table.”
>Of course, it doesn’t stop there.
>Now forced out of her comfort zone, the filly immediately begins almost inhaling her food.
“Scoots, mind your manners.”
>She ignores you.
“Scootaloo, last warning.”
>She only speeds up, eager to leave.
“Alright.” You say as you take up her plate.. “I’ve been patient, I’ve tried getting you to open up, but it’s clearly not working.”
>Pouring all the food into a single bowl, you give it a couple of mixes, giving it the consistency of a bowl of scraps, then set it on the floor.
“If you’re going to act like an animal, I’ll treat you like one.”
>She clearly looks like she could just up and run, but she doesn’t.
>Maybe reality hit her, maybe you got through, maybe it’s just your rarely used harsh tone.
>But for whatever reason, Scootaloo, sniffling slightly, goes to eat her bowl of mush.
>The other fillies make frequent, concerned glances, but try to eat as normal.
>Scootaloo finishes her food first of course, and quickly runs to the spare room, which she has alone since Sweetie moved to your bed.
“I’m going to make sure she’s alright. You two give us some space. Bloom, you’re in charge.”
>Quickly chewing through your steak, you follow to check on her.
>From outside the door, you can hear tiny, muffled sobs.
>You knock and are immediately met by a loud “GO AWAY!”
>Ignoring her, you go inside to find a crying Scootaloo, glaring back at you from her pillow with bloodshot eyes.
>Sitting on the bed beside her, you pet her on the back to try to build rapport
“Hey Scoots, what’s wrong?”
>”Oh I dunno, you made me eat off the floor maybe?”
“That’s called a punishment, Scootaloo. I mean why do you act so weird around me?”
>She simply buries her face back in the pillow.
>You let her sob a minute before you start stroking her mane.
“Scoots. I don’t enjoy punishing you, but I felt trying something creative was my only option. I’m not your enemy, you know? You could be very happy here if you’d just let me in.”
>She stays silent for a while longer before she finally speaks up.
>”They just sold me off. My family just traded me for some money. I always knew they hated me.”
“Aww, Scoots, no. Look, your family...they didn’t look like they were in great shape. Maybe they figured this would be a better chance for you to have a decent life.”
“I mean, Sweetie and Bloom got sold, and their families clearly love them dearly.”
>”Yeah right. Mine just pretended I didn’t exist.”
“Well...it’s up to you if you see them again. Even if it has to wait a few years, they probably deserve another chance.”
>There’s another long pause before she finally manages to croak out another question.
>”Anon..uh, sir? Do you think I was a waste of money?”
>”Come on, even a foal knows how this works. If a stallion buys a mare, she’s supposed to just shut up and do what he says.”
>”Applebloom and Sweetie Belle are so good, and I’m just not. Do you wish you didn’t buy me?”
“Well Scoots, I just can’t think of people like that. I think you’ve got a bit of baggage, but you’ll make a lovely pet if you’d just let me teach you.”
>She takes a little while before answering again.
>”What would you want me to do?”
“Well, the most important part of this is trust. I need you to trust me. Do you trust me?”
>”I..I think so. Yeah?”
“Are you sure? Do you care to test that?”
“Alright. I’m going to do some things to you. They’ll scare you, but you need to trust me and let it happen. Stand up and face away from me.”
>Nervously, the winged pony does as you say, placing her little rump right in your sight.
“Now repeat after me. Master will never hurt me.”
>She pauses a moment to mentally taste the words.
>”Master will never hurt me.”
>With no warning, your hand darts out, grabbing her by the mane.
>Without being gentle, you force her eyes forward, and you into her blind spot.
>She struggles as you push her onto all fours by the small of her back, manhandle her delicate wings, and claw her haunches hard enough that it could maybe draw a little blood.
>All while she’s completely blind to your next move.
>The entire scene is designed to prey upon her ingrained, instinctual fears.
>And if her struggles are an indication, it’s working.
>”Please stop! Please! PLEEEEEAAAASE!”
>Easing up, you lean into her ears to drive the point home.
“You know Scoots” you start, your heavy breath filling her nostrils, still smelling of meat and smoke.
“I don’t think you know just how…..compromising your position is. I could really, really hurt you right now if I wanted. Are you afraid?”
“Why? What did we just talk about?”
>”Th..that you’ll never hurt me?”
“And who am I?”
>She has to think for a moment to understand you in her addled state.
“Good girl. Keep what I told you in your head, now.”
>Quickly turning her around, you take hold of her throat with one hand and squeeze.
>The other finds her delicate folds, and you begin dipping fingers in her honey pot.
>Scootaloo kicks, she struggles, but you maintain grip, stimulation and eye contact.
>Eventually though, the struggles start to die down as her eyes roll back.
>Shortly after, her eyes begin to flutter closed, telling you it’s time.
>Releasing your grip, the filly falls limp in a coughing, gasping, orgasming pile.
>It takes a moment for her hips to stop bucking, and longer for her breathing to become less desperate, but she’s soon able to raise a bloodshot eye to meet yours.
“See Scootaloo? I might do some stuff that’s scary, or that you might not always understand, but you don’t need to worry, because…..because?”
>”Because Master….will never….will never hurt me.” she claims in a monotone voice.
“That’s right.” You claim as you scoop the filly up. “I think someone’s had a lot of breakthroughs tonight, and she deserves a lot of cuddles.”
>The filly nuzzles into your chest slightly as you carry her to your own room.
“COME ON GIRLS! BED! WE GOTTA BE UP EARLY FOR OUR TRIP TO CANTERLOT TOMORROW!”
>The two come charging in, hoping into be almost as soon as you do.
>Finally, you have all three of your special girls to keep you warm.
I'll finish this up tomorrow probably.
Hope you guys liked it, and hope it wasn't too OoC for my Anon.
She doesn't sound convinced. Maybe some more conventional training will be needed
>>Laughing, you give her a pat on the head, which you use as an opportunity to “accidentally” brush against her still charged horn, earning you an adorable “mmph”.
>>It tingles in your touch, and seems to send a jolt down her spine.
Love the tease.
>I like your story; one of the few where Anon isn't completely unlikeable.
Agreed: while I like most of the stories here, it's refreshing to read something that doesn't flirt with grimdark. Dom can be alot of things. Vhatugs story is a good take on one of them.
>I think my dog is going to die tonight :(
Survival Anon was the one where the Anon used a hunting bow a lot and ended up getting to know Gilda, right? That was a good one.
Heh, I didn't notice the timestamp in >>20107931. Thanks for pointing it out.
ERA posted just the other day. Calm your tits. We're getting enough traffic in this thread.
I dunno. I like the "fish out of water, thrust into a new world very different to his own, has to use his wits to survive and get into a position with some security" that the darker stories have. This one, and the other happy dom story seem more like the opening song of the lego movie, minus the personality.
That's rough. I had an uncle pass away last week. Good luck to your dog, though.
Ponies need the tease, Anon.
Thanks Anon's, you're good people.
And I mean the chapter.
That's rough man. Hope you and he both will be okay.
>This one, and the other happy dom story seem more like the opening song of the lego movie, minus the personality.
Sorry you feel that way, Anon.
But as a guy who's spent enough time hanging out on bdsm sites, and dabbled a bit myself with a handful of online slaves, there's a limit on believability for me.
I could read or even write something extreme for a chapter or two, but beyond that I need to be able to sympathize with the Anon, to put myself in his shoes. And I just can't do that with a lot of the darker stories here.
Actually not me. There is at least one other anon in this thread into breathplay, and that makes me happy.
>That's rough man. Hope you and he both will be okay.
Thanks. But she is looking really bad, refusing food and everything. I'm afraid I'm going to have to put her down or face her starving herself to death, as she has refused to eat for the last 24 hours, and she was rail thin already.
I'll be fine, just a little sad right now.
That was fast...
Horses for some reason appear to have a relatively small surface area to sweat from resulting in 25 % of heat generated to be stored. This means that a horse continually running would raise its core temperature.
There is nothing that blocks sweating while moving.
Interestingly it appears to be mostly the conditioning of following orders that appears to cause the exhaustion as horses do exhibit a natural aversion to work when already suffering from high core temperatures.
Anon should fuck Applebloom in front of the other two. This will
1: Show the other two the reward for being a good pet
2: Establish further dominance over the three by further showing them their place
3: Get Applebloom more use to exhibitionism which I think was a goal
Also its my fetish pls respond
Well, my night (maybe my week) just went to absolute shit. I'm probably gonna go murderfuck legion in fallout till I feel better or something.
I'll write whenever I start feeling better.
But the fact remains that you don't need intensive, specialized training to make hoers willing to push themselves to their absolute for you.
In fact, I hear it's so common you need to learn how to tell when they're exhausted and watch them so they don't hurt themselves.
Heavy oral scene with snowballing is planned, with the intention of establishing dominance.
I could certainly consider more exhibitionism if you've got ideas. I mean, currently they all wear buttplugs, and Applebloom has a leash, tail wrap, and is trained to hold her tail high.
>I need to be able to sympathize with the Anon
The sympathizing with Anon, for me, comes in his internal world, and how he's dealing with the situations he finds himself in. The real conflict in the story that the arbitrary sexual encounters are built around.
In my opinion, a man is defined from the inside out, not from their relationships with others. At least not unless you've got enough of a variety of different kinds of relationships (subject-to-bystander, subject-to-peer, subject-to-superior, subject-to-inferior/slave, etc.) that'll let you get a good overall view of how he interacts with everyone, but it's rare, and a little unreasonable to expect that kind of mix of interactions. Omniscient narration that describes the characters internal thoughts is something I usually really enjoy reading.
>something extreme for a chapter or two
Yeah, a story needs contrast and variety to keep viewer interest; buildup, crescendo, and a rest afterwards.
Look at the Fleur story, at the end of the first chapter, it describes Anon doing something on the extreme end to Mayor Mare. The rest and contrast to that is in how Fleur internally monologues about Anon and how he treats her, then in how Anon speaks to Fleur after about how much he appreciates her. That shows a positive side to him. Against the backdrop of the relatively darker thing that just happened with Mayor Mare, the contrast makes that part a lot more human and a little bit heartwarming, if I'm being completely honest.
Extreme hardcore evil all the time with no variation is like reading that story where Anon lead a crack group of assassins to the castle, killing all the royal guards with his ninja katana. It's a little grating and not very engaging, even though it has action. It's the contrast and context that make a story or scene feel more full-bodied.
The exception for me is if someone writes a relatively short scene that just nails a specific fetish perfectly. Simple, but memorable.
>Some more time passed.
>You’ve made it a habit to try and see him at least once a day.
>He would always report for duty in the morning, just after you lowered the moon.
>You would perform your duties, and than rush to the gates to meet him as he arrived.
>He would always smile and say hello, before going to the barracks.
>It would awaken the butterflies in your stomach.
>Luckily your coat hid any hint of a blush with ease.
>It was… unbecoming of a Princess to show such blatant interest.
>No, you needed to be careful courting this stallion.
>Surely any word of your interest would send the city into a frenzy.
>A princess and her guard…
>Some time passed.
>You were no longer able to meet him at the gate.
>Instead, Celestia tasked you with signing documents during the early morning.
>While you were definitely excited about any increase in your official government duties, you couldn’t help but feel upset.
>It was perhaps the highlight of your day; and now it was gone.
>You tried to have Celestia schedule the document signing period at a later point, or even during the evening during your watch, yet she insisted that it must be done in the morning.
>Begrudgingly, you abided by this request.
>You would simply need to meet him during another time.
>A few days past until you decided upon an idea.
>You would invite him to stay for dinner with you and Celestia!
>It only made sense.
>You and Celestia should know more about the guards who protect you.
>And surely he would enjoy dinning with you.
>He seemed so happy to see you every morning, of course he would enjoy spending time with you!
>You remember proposing the idea to Celestia.
>She was eager to agree with your proposal.
>She even suggested that the dinners start next week.
>You were so excited, you could hardly wait.
>You should have known….
>The week passed agonizingly slow.
>The first dinner however, when perfectly.
>You, and Celestial Shield conversed about the many happening within the city.
>Celestia seemed to focus her conversation more personal topics.
>It was very uncouth of her.
>You doubted that her and Celestial Shield so much as spoke before than, yet their conversation was very personal.
>A princess should maintain her pose at all times.
>You reminded yourself to remind Celestia of that.
>After a few weeks, and a few more conversations with Celestial Shield, you decided to take a calculated risk.
>It was definitely a very… overt display of your interest.
>You planned to make dinner yourself, and than, if everything went to plan, go for a evening walk with him.
>You wanted to show him your evening sky.
>You remember spending seemingly countless evenings planning out a stunning new star constellation for him.
>You spent even more time perfecting a variety of recipes to satisfy almost any taste.
>You remember calling upon the local winery to use some of their most finely aged bottles.
>You wanted it to be perfect.
>You should have known.
>The evening of the dinner came.
>You spent the entire afternoon preparing the ingredients.
>Agonizing over every slice of onion.
>Focusing on how each carrot was shredded, ensuring they wouldn’t be too thick, or even worse, too thin.
>Celestia was even surprisingly supportive of your efforts, and recommended which wine would best compliment the meal.
>Eventually, after hours of preparation, the dinner was almost ready to start.
>However before you returned to your quarters, you remembered to preheat the oven to make your dessert.
>Chocolate Chip Cookies.
>You’ve made a batch nearly every day since you’ve moved into the castle.
>Your recipe has undergone hundreds of iterations, before reaching it’s final form.
>You’ve experimented with imported chocolates, different species as egg donors, different types of flower…
>You’ve never had anyone test them before besides yourself.
>You went to your room, and made sure your regalia was well polished, and that your coat was properly groomed.
>You applied your favorite perfume before making your way to the dinner.
>You wanted to look your best for him.
>After returning to the Royal Dinning Hall, you and Celestia retrieved Celestial Shield, and escorted him to the table.
>Celestia even let you sit at the head of the table!
>She sat directly across from Celestial Shield.
>You went to retrieve the various courses of the meal, using your magic to levitate the variety of different plates, bowls, and various other items.
>After placing the food on the table, you took your seat, and began to eat.
>The dinner went well.
>Celestia pointed out that you made the meal, which seemed to impress Celestial Shield.
>Him and Celestia chuckled a few times for no clear reason, but the conversation was otherwise very entertaining.
>After the meal was over Celestia, yourself, and Celestial Shield all casually sipped on the wine, and consumed light cheese.
>Celestia and Celestial Shield drank more than you did, and Celestia moved to sit next to the guard pony, leaning on him for support.
>After a while longer, he leaned into her as well, and used his hoof to support her.
>They must have been tired from a long day.
>Remembering that you still needed to serve dessert, you quickly left, and returned to the kitchen.
>As you went to place the cookies into the oven, you were shocked to find the oven turned off.
>You mentally berated yourself for forgetting to turn it on, earlier, even though you could have sworn you did so.
>This set back forced you to wait twenty long minutes before the cookies could be placed into the oven, and short time before they finished cooking.
>As you watched the cookies bake, you became increasingly nervous.
>You didn’t want to keep him waiting too long; he looked tired.
>Certainly he would have been making his way home soon…
>Your worries were interrupted by the timer going off.
>You quickly removed the tray from the oven, and place the batch of cookies onto a plate.
>After pouring two glasses of cold milk, you swiftly make your way back to the dining hall.
>Celestia should have returned to her room, so there was no was no need to pour a third glass.
>As you made your way back towards the dinning hall, you became increasingly nervous.
>Did he enjoy your dinner that you made for him?
>Would he enjoy the cookies you made?
>Would he go on a walk afterwards?
>You desperately wanted to show him your work with the night sky.
>So few people ever looked at it.
>And no one has ever seen you perform your work besides Celestia…
>You just hoped that he would find it… impressive.
Shh, hoers doesn't want to think, she just wants to wear the saddle all day long.
All I really meant is that I can't enjoy stories where Anon is a huge asshole if that story goes on much longer than a one shot.
Some people can, and more power to them. It's not my place to judge. But I can't, and I'm sure I'm not alone.
But I need that to feed hungry fillies!
Anyway, with any luck I'll feel up to writing soon. Sorry that personal shit is getting in the way.
That's all for now. As O said, it's a lot more subtle than my other works, but O think it's a good test of writing for myself.
A question for you all regarding Octavia.
>Is it too edgy?
I think that, perhaps by accident, I've taken a turn towards edginess in that story. I think all my scenes so far worked, and works well, but maybe there wasn't enough to low intensity scenes recently to balance them.
Moving forward, I think the next few scenes will be more calm. I want to make sure that I'm still telling an effective story about Octavia. If at any point, you guys feel that isn't happening, let's know.
tikbalang, the word you're looking for is tikbalang, the lover snatcher.
they come at night, seduce your spouse away whit their horsey genitals and voice acting and snatch them away into the jungles. then they take it's place and you suddenly wonder why the sex is way better and your relationship much more stable
>A question for you all regarding Octavia.
>>Is it too edgy?
Nah. It's got tense moments, but her character development and arc makes sense. I'm interested to see how the scene with the maid resolves, and how Octavia deals with the aftermath, but I think what you're doing works.
>You're marching out of the dungeons, mouthing to yourself. To either side of you is a hundred bound plots. Thanks to the pegasus, Firefly you're feeling angry, and sad, and horny all at the same time. Stupid Fucking Mares. Damn Little Ponies.
>A mare grabs your leg. Tells you something about how great she is in bed, and how desperately she wants out of here. As your better judgement comes to you you shake her off. Not a chance. You can't be doing with this.
>You're trudging through the great hall. Nearly to your chambers, nearly able to rest and block out all these dissident little ponies. They all need to be locked up they do. Put in little outfits with the feathers on the top, you know the ones, and paraded around at a circus. You tip your imaginary top hat, and you make yourself a little whipping motion.
"Get little horsies! Get!"
>Right now the ponies are coming to you for all sorts of things. The candy-ass Tenorhooves in particular, is tailing you about some spreadsheets or something or other. You bounce everything off of you. Not while you're the only person in this whorehouse not getting any, and not until you've had your rest.
>You're nearly there. On the final floor. A few rooms away from freedom, you're stopped dead in your tracks. Ahead of you, robed, is a taller pony, completely draped in black, wearing what must be a steel facemask.
>You're trying to decode whether it is a mare or stallion when a deep mare's voice comes out.
>"I was told, I could find an Anonymous here."
>Zigger please. You reach for your door handle when a hoof crosses in front of it firmly.
>"I come representing the Vice Squad, loyal partners of the Chateau d'Shackles for eons. We were wondering if we could work out a deal."
"Sorry, I can't be having that. While Shackles is away, no-one is reaching into the budget, and I'm definitely not making any bargains."
>"It's much, much simpler than that. I simply ask for permission to put our seal on your hotel." She extends her left hoof, marked into it an elaborate letter V, and flanked by a crescent moon.
>"Put the seal at any location in your establishment, and we would gladly supply you anything you require, and a monthly gift package of 100,000 bits. It let's everypony know we are on friendly terms. Nopony will notice. Especially not your boss, Shackles."
>The offer is tempting. Really tempting. You can't see the harm in making a mark. Under a chair, perhaps. Behind a cabinet. But what kind of "squad" would offer this anyway?
"I'm sorry, I really am, but I don't think it's up to me to say."
>"Very well, we'll be back later. It is a very rare privilege, for the Squad to make the same offer twice."
>And she's gone. All the ponies, all the horseshit you've been wading through. Gone. You slip quickly into your room, debate to yourself on whether you should wank to the thought of piledriving a bound pegasus, decide against it, and get ready to clock out.
>You've just jumped into your bed, it couldn't have been more than 10 seconds, when you hear a rustling in your room. You pull the light and find waiting all this time, a staggeringly blitzed, orange earth pony, green hair frazzled all over under her well to do Sunday dress hat.
"Vedalia... Clementine... er- Valencia, what are you doing here?"
>She puts her hoof to your face sloppily.
>"You seem stressed out. Let me take care of you."
>And the mare does. You'll give her credit for reading you this well, every joint in your body is ready to blow, and as she gets to sliding down your trousers all the weight seems removed. But, are you sure you're supposed to be doing this?
"I'm sorry. I don't think that-"
>"It's fine, silly boy. I know when a guy needs some release."
>You don't know what to say of the mare talking so condescendingly to you. You certainly don't know what to say about a little filly so forcefully taking control. So you don't say anything. She teases you a bit, gets down to bobbing, the usual blowjob stuff. Working in the field you've seen these kinds of things hundreds of times, but feeling it is another matter. You can probably guess the experience she's got under her belt, from an errant boyfriend or two, and she's definitely an eager whore, but she's an undisciplined one.
>She must be 10-15 bobs in when she pauses. Stares at you seductively, and rolls it off her tongue.
>"The price is fifteen hundred bits."
>You can't help but kek a bit at that one. You sheepishly laugh and talk to the girl.
"You've got great business sense kid, but sometimes you really make me want to beat the shit out of you."
>She's slightly shocked, but her interest is piqued. Twice as seductive this time.
>"Three thousand bits," she positions her flank "and you can hit me as much as you want."
>What kind of boyfriend did she have? Your body was already pretty anxious, but something inside of you... expands when she says this.
>You don't know what you can say. You hit her. You wind your arm up, prepare to give this girl hell, and it comes out as a light slap on the cheek.
>She's going along fine with it, but you're embarrassed. You can't even hit a girl properly.
"I hate you, you know that?"
>"Oh yes, I'm horrible. I've been so bad."
>A little harder this time.
"No, you don't get it. I hate you."
>You take her off guard. Build up your confidence. Plunge haphazardly into her marehood. Claw one hand into her shoulder, and pommel her with the other. With each smack you let a word loose.
"Stupid-fucking-spoiled-pony-whore. Trotting-around-like-you-own-the-damned-place. Damned-great-parents-you-had-and-you-ended-up-here."
>What can you say. The filly ticks you off. A long day of shit and you're greeted to her vapid fucking face? No chance. Things escalate quickly as your body slaps against her panicking plot.
>What's happening can't really be described in detail. It's >rape. It's humping. The rutting of two animals. A wrecked locomotive comes to mind, so does a Free Jazz improvisation, or a rush of fanboys at a convention. By the end of it the mare is crying and the man is sprawled on the side of his bed.
>Were you really supposed to do that? Screwing the one bosses' off limits girls, not to mention forcing yourself on her? You slide your pants on, tiptoe past the nearly catatonic mare, and try to get some walking in. Celestia, you feel like shit. You leave the door and let the images of her curled up face, bruised and bleeding, resonate in the back of your skull.
>You're on your way to turn the bend into the next hallway, when a pair of strong stallions hooves come in from either direction, and you're out.
Not until my next chapter. Would have been a longer chapter but I'm reworking what happens next.
I wish I was kidding but last night I dreamt of consensual sex in the missionary position between two conventionally attractive humans. I was extremely surprised and shocked by this.
Also, page 4 and dropping.
Well for some critique (if your in to that *wink*)
First of all I notice that I and another anon who commented last time are kinda having problems figuring out who is who in this OC heavy fic. I don't know who Valencia is or if she was casually mentioned or not but if you intend on using reoccurring characters who have names you may want to consider setting them up a bit (like a few lines) to separate them from background characters and so the reader can note who they are.
Second of all that >rape scene. Listen if you are going to write clop write clop. If you don't that's fine just focus on the build up and the aftermath of the event. But don't half-ass clop scenes with "what's happening can't really be described" after you "Plunge haphazardly into her marehood" and describe it more there. Its jarring
Overall I like your story so far and the idea of Anon working his way up to the master of all horse pussy but your writing needs some work
Fair enough, as far as character introductions, this chapter was originally a second part of chp.3, so I kind of skimped on setting things up a second time.
As far as writing clop, I'll keep that in mind. I really just found the opening premise "3000 bits and you can hit me however much as you want" really sexy, while the sex itself is just your average flesh slapping together. Expect better descriptions in the more creative scenarios lined up.
>Day cycle 782 within "Equestria". A nation on a version of Sol 3 located within an alternate dimension.
>You had been rather upset at your separation from your kin.
>More so at the prospect of life among a race so undeveloped that they still participated in tribalistic worship of natural phenomena.
>There were redeeming features, however. The prospect of studying the potent and previously unknown energy the locals ignorantly refer to as magic is the first thing that comes to mind.
>Second was, if you must live among them, you at least were able to live among the cattle and equines, for whom your race had developed a fondness shared with their human masters over the long years.
>The idea of prodding one, of making them squirm while they could give feedback made you quite excited.
>It had taken you some time to build a laboratory from scratch and render the services of one of the local bovines designated "Daisy Jo", but you were finally prepared to perform a proper anatomical study.
>The "cow" has been strapped onto a table, and the equipment properly positioned.
>"Anonymous, this is lookin kinda dangerous. Are ya sure this is really safe?"
>This is true. Given your inability to escape possible repercussions from local authorities, you've decided to avoid causing intentional permanent bodily harm.
>"It's not that I don't wanna help don'tcha know? I just wanna make sure you know what you're do-"
>Ignoring the subject's inane prattle, you start the machine, the suction upon her mammary glands halting her speech.
>The next feature lifts her tail and forces her oral cavity wide as the large, whirring scientific probes extend to her oral, anal, and vaginal cavities.
>You make a brief check to ensure your camera is recording properly, as you'll surely need to review the footage many times to learn all it has to teach.
>Finally done, you settle in for the next several hours as gutteral, pleasured noises mix with the sounds of machinery.
I like your story so far.. but you might want to develop anon a bit more before adding more plot threads. The robed pony scene kind of came out of nowhere.
I'm not sure how to feel about this since my love is for horses... but
>They have hooves
Anon! Why should only ponies get the opportunity to wear a collar?
Feeling a bit better in general, so gonna try to get some writing in.
To the guy who wanted more exhibitionism, what ideas did you have in mind, because I'm certainly not opposed to it.
What about cuddling the cattle?
Much more interesting than the first part. I have an idea where this is going, and i really like it. Maybe the first part had the hints too, but they were too subtle, for me to catch.
I like to know more about NMM's past. Knowing how she was hurt and lost her illusions and innocence makes the monster she is now much more relatable. For me, seeing emotional pain is much more enjoyable than physical.
>Octavia too edgy
I wanted to say "absolutely not", but when I think about it, there is something edgy that I don't like.
What I like about Octavia story, are not "low intensity" scenes, but "low scale" scenes. Octavia going to the library to pick up a dirty book? That was good. Nothing major happened, but we went through it and saw ponies being ponies, living their lives, telling stories, feeling emotions and stuff.
What I dislike, are actually the NMM scenes. Don't take it the wrong way! I love your NMM, but... it's difficult to explain... NMM overwhelms every scene she is in. Even when we see it from Octavia's PoV, when NMM is int he room, it is a scene about NMM, not about Octavia. I dislike that.
Take for example the dinner scene where NMM made Octavia act like a dog. What was that about? It showed us a lot about NMM, how polarized her personality is, and how she doesn't get that other ponies have certain limits and the suffer when pushed past them, that she can be motherly and just how damaged and oblivious to certain things she is.
But what did we find out about Octavia? That she doesn't like strangers inspecting her genitals? Gee, who would have guessed!
It was good to see Octavia being dominated, but it wasn't about who's being dominated, but who's dominating. It wasn't some small scale everyday life thing either, it was a maid and her empress, it was something special.
The scene with dark shield? that was good. It wasn't about him, it was about Octavia. A maid dealing with an asshole guard, that could happen to any maid in the castle. It was the kind of thing that probably happens every day to someone, but nobody talk about. It was not a low intensity, just low scale, very personal.
Same would go for Octavia dealing with cooks, or aids or even anon's pets. It shows us how life goes for the non-priviledged ponies. And it's good.
Calm scenes are good for showing us how is Octavia dealing with her life situation and herself. Again , nothing much is happening, but it is a memorable experience nonetheless, because it's personal.
Edgy things are good if if handled with care. Ordering a maid to be mutilated is bad kind of edgy. Being treated like shit by someone, belittled, sladered and bullied, not being able to take it anymore, crying alone in your bed, building up resolve to make them stop, taking the chance talking to the Beast and then finally being able to make them stop, and make sure that nobody else tries to treat you like shit again, that's the good kind of edgy.
Also, the Octavia pastebin is not up to date.
Thanks for the input. I definately see how people might view NMM as overpowering in her scenes, and so some extent, that is intentional.
NMM, escpecially in the Octavia POV, is the only real source of authority introduced yet. We have Anon, but Octavia doesnt interact with him much. NMM's ability to dominate a scene is an act of power in itself. The execution and dinner scenes are two examples. It didnt matter what Octavia wanted. NMM has absolute control, and did what she wanted, simple because she could. Octavia was along for the ride.
However, looking back I definately understand your point, I sometimes have trouble writing NMM as a secondary character in a scene, and I definately need to improve on that. In the scenes up mentioned I think it's have been too NMM centric, and moving forward, I hope to improve on that.
Moving forward I think there will be more low intensity scenes. I may loss in some low-scale scenes as well, if they fit well. One more NMM scene is planned, which should be more calm than any other NMM/Octavia scene so far, and than we are moving forward.
It's all very rushed.
>Someone offers some marking and 100'000 bits
What was that all about?
>Anon not fucking any of the hundred mares that work for his boss
Why? Isn't it like their job? Did I miss some rule that forbids him from doing that?
Who? Is she someone special? Then why fuck her and not someone else?
>the usual blowjob stuff
No! You don't say that. Even if it's a average, daily, boring blowjob, you have to give it more details.
>the images of her curled up face, bruised and bleeding,
It was that bad? Why didn't we hear her scream? or beg Anon not to hit her so hard? Tell me what's happening, describe it. How does it look, how does it sound, how does it feel?
Reading your story is like watching the Tranformers movies. Things are happening, but there is no pacing and no sense to any of it.
There were good bits though.
>"Three thousand bits," she positions her flank "and you can hit me as much as you want."
That one line told us so much about that character. (It would have been even better if during the sex she begged Anon to stop and that she won't demand him to pay up if he stops hitting her right now.)
>What was that all about?
Thought now was as good a time as ever to introduce this sub plot, it will show up in the future.
>Why? Isn't it like their job? Did I miss some rule that forbids him from doing that?
It's usually the bosses job to break in the girls (i.e. the anons in all the other stories.) Anon is given charge of the place for a week or two, and told not to touch the bosses girls.
>Who? Is she someone special? Then why fuck her and not someone else?
Girl getting sold by her father in chapter two. Given the part of a spoiled teen.
>No! You don't say that.
>It was that bad?
I dunno, I kind of felt like the sex wouldn't be as interesting to the audience as the build up/ aftermath. But yeah, I will definitely try to get a pace going on.
>We have Anon, but Octavia doesnt interact with him much.
Relating to what was said here:
>It was good to see Octavia being dominated, but it wasn't about who's being dominated, but who's dominating.
I'd like to see some more Octavia / Anon scenes. I forget where you are in the story, so I don't remember how much interaction Anon has with Octavia, but It's plausible that she's at least see him around before, maybe walked past him in the halls, depending on where her duties took her. Even if there's no real direct interaction between them, I think he'd still leave a bit of an impression on whoever he passed by in the hallway the first time.
He doesn't just teleport outside the castle to go on patrol, and he's probably got at least some kind of a life aside from work, and fucking his slaves. Maybe he's checking out the library books to learn a bit more about the world he's been teleported into.
I like that this is an Octavia-focused story, but it's feeling like a NMM / Octavia story, and I think Anon should get a bigger role, even if it's small.
>Idea for a one-shot if anyone wants to try it: The life of a random civilian as the switchover to the new world order happens. Kind of like the explanation of how Fleur was brought over, but from the perspective of a common pony.
I haven't read the ArseAnon story. There wasn't any explanation of how a human arrived in a magical fantasy world at the beginning of the story, so I decided to skip it.
Can someone give me a rundown of how the story is going so far? What it's general tone or strengths and weaknesses are? How it compares to the