So basically I have been on hrt and in transition for a year and now I am stuck as a half man half woman mutant freak. What the fuck comes next? No one ever prepared me for this, everyone just said take hrt till people start seeing you as a girl and then go full time but is more complicated than that.
You need to socialize in the fashion women do to fully transition. You should already have a female mentality if you went that far, so it shouldn't be so hard to get. I am seven months in and I am finally getting into the hang of things socially. Started making real girl friends and having fun with life finally.
Kek, hard to believe that shit. Your voice is next, obv.
Grab a pushup bra, maybe inlays and some cheap clothes you think you'd dare going outside in and get comfy wearing that stuff.
Grow your hair, get rid of your beard, it'll all come to you slowly.
Do your eyebrows, try out eyeliner or kajal, should give a small confidence boost.
Seems too much focus on the appearance and not enough on the substance. The goal isn't to look like a girl, but to be one. I mean, those are probably things you do want to work on as well, but you don't want to neglect your emotional and mental development just to look more convincing. I recommend a more balanced approach.
It sounds like you're going against your own natural tendencies to fit in with some clique, as if you were in high school. That and it seems like you're like a little duckling, desparately trying to immitate its mother's movements. It honestly just seems really bizzare.
You cannot ever truly do those things without looking the part. People probably play along, but it's far from being "real". If you can just shoot ahead like that, good for you, but it took me quite some time to shed that masquerade I built to conform to people's expectations and being comfy with my looks made it so much easier to also be that person I wanted to be without clenching my butt.
You seem to be an outgoing type, but not everyone is.
You need to start talking to people, and letting them get to know you anyways. Not even as trans or anything, just as a person. You build a rapport with someone, and they come to think of you as a girl and it leads others to do the same thing, since they will talk to others about it too. You need to start socializing for anyone to even understand you anyways.
There is waaay more to being a girl than the physical. That isn't even close to the most important parts anyway. Ask girls for help if you need help, we help each other out. You might find occasional snobs, but women are generally nicer and more sympathetic especially if approached genuinely.
I was outgoing early, but then went super hermit status after puberty. Cue to 12 years later, and I am reverting back pretty well.
I can tell you that any weird interactions I've had with people has always been some guy that knew me before. Girls and women have all been really awesome about it, got so many hugs and compliments and it really made things pretty awesome.
But then again, I didn't change communities or jobs or anything, I transitioned in a place I am very publically known and interacted with for over 10 years. You have to learn to socialize to some degree in this sort of situation, or you will have a very weird time of things indeed, so I am sure that jumpstarted that for me.
Why can't you just socialize as it comes natural to do so for you? It kinda just sounds like you're wearing another mask. Is it because of how people will judge you? I'm no expert, but behavior that has to be learned and forced, just sounds like conformity and doesn't sound comfortable at all.
So much this. If you make cis female friends they will get you there so much quicker. If cis females don't accept that you are female it will be so lonely. Focus on emotion, voice, and manner. Lose the male privilege.
I didn't say that, I just said you have to socialize period. I see so many trans girls just not even doing that, and I don't even understand it and it just hurts them. I didn't say anything about forced or learning to do it in a different way than you would naturally do. I just said that if you don't you would have a very weird time, because things will change and no one will have ANY idea what to think and all sorts of rumors will fly unless YOU do something about it personally.
I have absolutely no clue how I would meet people while I feel like a total freak.
From what I've experienced, their expectations are too high for me, and I don't really get help with the things I need it for.
Maybe I didn't meet the right people or something, but then I don't know how I would.
That would feel like trying so hard to be a woman doing "woman stuff" that I cannot identify with at all...
Like shedding one masquerade to put on another.
I knew I'd be a dyke before I went through with it, but I didn't think I couldn't do it without help, for which I wouldn't have had any friends anyway.
The only thing I think I'd genuinly volunteer for is being a bat rescuer and I cannot do that where I live.
Well, girls interact with each other a lot, so you are gonna have to find some way to get to that level. If you see a girl wearing something you like, compliment her on it and then talk to her about other things if she seems friendly and responsive. It could lead to a real conversation, and a new friend.
You don't have to go to events and things you don't believe in, but you do have to seize opportunities you come across or they will slip by you. You can meet a new friend at the super market, getting coffee at a random place, or even just walking down the street. You just have to get to the point were you are not afraid to say something at all.
Way too urban where I live. I'm not all that interested in many animals either. I just did some drugs once and had a crazy bad trip and someone tried to calm me down telling me about cutesy bats, and that burnt itself into my mind somehow and I've become a bat fanatic.
I'll give it a thought, but there's very little fauna around where I live. Not opposed to moving somewhere else after surgeries, but for now I'm bound.
I don't understand what girls would like to be friends with tranny freaks? Or do you mean the weirdo sjw girls that will be friends with anyone? What about normal women who actually are successful in life and have self respect and care about their image
Well let us see, I go out with a group of girls and young women every few weeks or so for a girls night, from ages 18 to 30. One of which is co-owner of a local business, and they all have jobs and/or schools they are working through. People aren't as negatively judgmental as you apparently, which is good news for the state of the world. Some people will get to know you before passing judgments like the ones you are spouting.
Sometimes we go out for drinks, other times we go to a movie, and occasionally we do karaoke. No commitments and we just have fun hanging out and having a good time. I have a girl as a room-mate, and we've become basically as close as sisters with what we share with each other emotionally. I have first-hand experienced that the world is not so dark if you get out there.
You need to stop, let your body return to normal, and begin a process of acceptance of your natural self. Read all of the literature and history about SRS and you'll see that it'll never make you feel better.
Because the most rational thing to do at all times is to assume that everyone that associates with you secretly pities you. That is a rabbit hole that no one lives down. Away with you. People won't regularly spend their free relaxation time with you if they don't like you.
what kind of stuff did you do before starting to transition? if you're not a gender-politicker or volunteering fan before you're not going to magically get into that shit.
did you play sports? read certain kinds of books? were you a weeb? did you play video games? are you into music? film? cooking?
I play some MMOs, yeah, and I go to festivals too. Used to play tennis and go inline skating but haven't done that in ages.
I got quite a bunch of hobbies but right now I'm pursueing almost none of them. Just feel way too bad about myself and my looks to be anything but nervous.