This is the Trans Help General thread. We'll try to help you here with everything related to being transgender.
This includes questioning, appearance, daily trans problems, medical info, general info and other interesting stuff to name a few.
MTF, FTM and questioning people are all welcome here to help eachother and discuss possible solutions.
You can also share your transgender related stories here. Just came out? Or you just need to get something off your chest?
Maybe something wonderful happened today! We'll be glad to hear it, it's always good to know we're not going through this alone.
Articles, Studies and General information about Questioning, Transitioning and other stuff: http://pastebin.com/CyW1dXV8
Lots of useful links about/for transgender people: http://pastebin.com/h1vLPxyV
Transgender FAQ: http://pastebin.com/8QbKyShU
Am i trans/ trans help threads archive: http://pastebin.com/CPzj0xv9
Non-passing MTFs, how do you buy clothes (especially underwear)? It's freaky as hell shopping in public stores, and though I haven't been approached yet I've gotten enough death glares simply browsing to fill a lifetime.
The problem with online is that I live with people who I'd much rather not notice me buying women's clothing. Don't suppose you can recommend anywhere that'll ship in a package with no indication of the contents?
Canada, so a lot of the time things coming from america will have the contents listed in a customs sticker (I've had an unpleasant enough experience with trying to explain why I bought '2x foundation'). Plus, tbh, I don't know a lot of clothing shops in general, and finding one whose name even isn't a dead giveaway..
No I meant like what I made with so people in the old thread will come to the new one. Having Annicole make that post adds credibility since she makes all the threads.
Unless it's protocol to have both going at once until the old one falls off?
i know i've got sunken eyes, a big nose, thin upper lip and prominent chin on a long face but it shouldn't be entirely unworkable once i've got some hair and get onto presentation stuff like eyebrows and that, right? maybe a nosejob at some point for sure
because the good looking ones are just out there living their lives whereas the ugly ones like me come and post pictures on 4chan to get people to say bad things to fuel our self-loathing
So I finally told my therapist about my disphoria. We talked about the requirements or whatever for HRT. Something about making sure the person receiving the hormones is in their proper mindset, and the person needing to identify as the opposite gender for a bit. What was explained was somewhat unclear to me because I am dumb. What are the requirements for HRT and how long do you have to wait to get on it usually? I'm from the US.
Does anybody know of any scientific studies, or even general knowledge, about breast growth in MtF people? It seems like a real crapshoot and I'm wondering if there any steps, medical or health-wise or dietary, which can promote breast growth while on HRT.
So something has been bothering me a lot. I dont know if Im genuinely trans (writing it seems ridiculous for me) or if Im depressed and see transitioning to a girl as an "out".
Let me explain: Im shy, quiet, id say insecure/unconfident and a general wallflower. But then I imagine that if I were a girl, Id have things easier - I think girls are more confident, talkaltive, sociable, i.e. the complete antithesis to me.
Especially, going by transition timelines (they make me feel really jealous - how a normal guy can change into a stunningly attractive girl and how all the ones posted seemed really happy with their outcomes). I wish I could have that.
But then I dont know if I genuinely am trans or just wish I was attractive/pretty/desireable.
Desireable sums it up, I think. Im not and perhaps changing into a girl will make me desireable.
I wish there were better resources for people who were questioning
I'm in a pretty similar position, I don't know for sure and I've spent a long time thinking about it and trying to analyze myself and the only conclusion I've come to is that I really need to go speak to a competent therapist. Everything else, the fantasies, the crossdressing, trying to present as female in online communities, it doesn't tell me anything for sure, just that I like some element of it, but I don't know what that element is.
Couple of nights ago I was lying in bed and tried saying "I'm a girl" out loud and it felt really good. But that could be an indicator of ... nothing. Nothing at all.
Fuck I wish they could just do some kind of test and know for sure.
>perhaps changing into a girl will make me desireable
Sounds like the wrong motivation for wanting to transition (and I'm pretty sure that's a red flag for "no").
For me being Trans isn't something that can be logically justified, I felt like I was a girl and that I wanted to be a girl. I tried shutting out the feelings and hoping they'd go away, but they didn't and as weird as they were that's just who I wanted to be.
I can never get my hair to look good, it's always so frizzy and shit. What do? I use conditioner and shampoo.
i'm not usually too sure about US, but to me it sounds like you may have to go through the RLE (real-life experience) which means that you will have to live as your preferred gender for a determined amount of time before you are eligible.
the way i've noticed is that it's just down to genetics and luck, I've known trans people with DD's that were natural, where as some are stuck with AA's There are a few tips and things that may hep to promote breast growth, but be wary there is a hell of a lot of misinformation around.
It doesn't sound like you are trans, transitioning is not a fix-all for your problems, just for the dysphoria that you feel. You will still have problems after you transition sometimes the same ones, and it's not guaranteed you will be attractive/desirable. Not without surgery at least.
If you are very confused, i would seek therapy, though judging from what you wrote, I do not think you are trans, it's a long and hard journey, that not everybody finishes, a lot of people commit suicide or detransition,
Seeking professional help may be the best option, it's not always clear cut about what makes someone trans, but if its not the right decision and you are not sure, then it could be a massive mistake that you end up regretting a lot.
FTM hormone question here. I've been on T for 8 years, always a weekly injection, but I'm starting to really not like the extreme highs and lows. Does anyone have any experience with low-dose daily testosterone or anything similar? Is there a good way to keep my levels in the "normal" range at all times?
have you tried asking the ftm general? I don't have much exprience, but im pretty sure the test injection should still be running through your body for a week, i'm not too sure why you would get highs and lows.
I don't think it's very likely, but then there are a lot of confused people around these days, why dont you tell us how you feel about transitioning. Also it may be benefcial to talk to a therapist or something about this.
I have a therapist but gender stuff isn't her specialty so I might have to find someone else, and I can't do that w/o going through my parents' insurance.
I really don't know about transitioning. I've been looking at people's transition timelines and feeling a very deep jealousy. For a long time I've wished I was more feminine but I sort of kept it suppressed. (which I used an illogical transphobia to support. When I started meeting actual transpeople I was forced to reconsider that, which sort of opened the floodgates). I'm afraid that it's some disgustingly odd form of vanity, too.
I dunno how I feel as a male. I don't exactly identify as male? but I really don't even know what it means to indentify as a gender to begin with.
Losing my genitals would be weird, I guess. I don't exactly hate being an outie, but I sort of don't like the body that comes with it. Or maybe I don't care. I really don't know.
use shampoo only once or twice a week, look for one without sulfates as it dries your hair. Also don't go full retard with your towel after going out of the shower. Just put the towel around your head and wait a few mins.
>I've been looking at people's transition timelines and feeling a very deep jealousy
This describes how I feel
Id rather not be an ugly girl and I dont "feel" Im in the wrong body but I do wish I was a pretty girl.
Does that make sense?
everyone wants to be a pretty girl anon, it's life on extreme easy mode. If you don't feel a sense of your body being wrong, you're probably not trans. I advise you to go to a therapist to sort things out though, you might have something else.
Id just like to add that it somehow pains me to see guys changing into pretty girls (I wish that were me) which is why I feel so jealous towards transition timelines like the other anon above. Its like a blade in my chest. Ive also had these feelings on and off for 3 years.
Arent there any online resources or anything?
I would agree with you, I want to be a pretty girl but I'd settle for average girl over attractive male. I'm told I'm anywhere between a 6 and a 9 now, but goddamn if I wouldn't trade it in to be a 6 or 5 cis girl. I'd hate to be ugly though, so I can see where the guy you're responding to is coming from.
well...how i did it was just mess around with random voices until i got it
pro-tip, try in an accent different from your own, but still similar ish. I just used to slip into falsetto and try not to make it so shrilly and then find the right resonance for a female.
Different anon here. I am hormonally transitioning so i guess i am trans though it seems like i have some weird opinions. I really don't thing i could deal with being an unattractive ugly girl. I know what it feels like to be hot and it feels amazing, even in guy mode. I reallyreally don't want to lose the feeling of being at least somewhat attractive which makes me sad because its probably unattainable cause i was born male. Even if i technically pass i dont think i could go fulltime looking like a manish woman.
So I made you guys a vocaroo. It's 4 AM, so I can't be very loud, my mic has weird interference and my throat is sore from yelling at CS:GO for the last uh... 5 hours, but I tried. I wouldn't have bothered but I've done a couple similar vocaroos in the past few weeks for people outside /lgbt/ and they said it helped, so hey, I might as well. Worst case I wasted 3 minutes of a few peoples' time. Soz :3
Play around and practice. Lots of practice. That said, don't practice too much at once! If your throat starts getting sore, have some water and stop. It'll probably get pretty sore, pretty quick at first too. Gonna say the word practice again. Practice. Yes, you might swallow or whatever at first, but they're just muscles! The more you play with trying to manipulate that part of your throat, the easier it becomes to do so in specific ways. Muscle memory and so forth. As I said, it sucks that the instructions are vague but it's basically a matter of "flex some muscles in your neck" which is, let's be honest, kind of hard to describe.
I forgot to mention it in the vocaroo, but if you have a mic, use it! Install Audacity and start recording yourself and playing it back. I find it really hard to tell if my own voice is of either gender, as weird as that sounds, and if you're the same way, maybe hop on Skype or something with a friend and try some stuff. Maybe just record a vocaroo and chuck it at them. Also, try not to use a headset mic, for so many reasons. Most of them are shitty quality $0.02 chinese button mics which are not designed in any way to be that close to the user's face. If you have a desk mic, use that. If you have a professional mic, even better! A headset mic will sound a lot bassier than you actually do irl (due to lower tones not traveling well through air, closer mic, etc) too. Alternately, headset resting on desk for the poor.
Good luck y'all.
I can't even raise my adam's apple. I can force it down, weirdly enough, and I understand that it rises when I swallow, but I literally can't even find the muscles to move it upward. I worry that I'm trying to run before I can walk.
This is going to sound like a whine, but I'm really at the end of my rope here. Please help.
How do I make this stop? Just never think about it again. My whole life I was followed by the recurring feeling that I'd have been a lot happier as a girl, but I never let it get to me other than a kind of sad "I wish" now and then because I didn't think anything could be done about it. I never identified as "trans", I barely even knew it was a thing. I didn't think about it. I was awkward, lonely, sad, whatever, but I didn't think once that that was the reason why, so it was fine. That was just me and I lived with it.
But within the past year I had a bit of a revelation experience and I finally realized that transition was actually possible for me to really actually do, and I had a complete fucking breakdown over it. Like, almost nonfunctional as a person because I realized I wanted to do it so badly and I knew what that meant I was. So I've been in therapy - for months now - I'm diagnosed, I've got the fucking letter, I can pretty much walk into a doctor's office any time now and ask for referral to an endo to get HRT and do this. But I'm so, so scared and so desperately ashamed.
All I feel anymore is sadness and shame because I know I want to do this more than anything, but I can't shut up that deeply instilled part of myself that tells me I'm mentally ill, disgusting, that the people I've come out to know I'm a freak now, that I'll just be ruining my life, that I'll probably regret it, that people who are sane don't do this and that there's no good reason I should feel like I have to. That I'll hurt and alienate so many people in my life by doing it, that it's embarrassing and selfish and crazy. I want to transition because -- I can't even explain it. I feel drawn to it, my heart aches for it, like it's the chance to fulfill a dream I've had all my life that I never thought I could.
But I'm disgusted with myself for that and I hate myself for it and I just want to make it stop. I don't want to have to want this. I want to stop wanting it.
Please, someone help. I want to go back to the way it was before - I don't want to have to ruin my life and my reputation and lose what little I have in the world by giving in to what I feel I know, logically, is a symptom of being fucking crazy. I just want to make it stop and forget about all of it. Yet I'm scared that I can't. I think about it every single day, constantly. I'm worried that if I don't do it my life will disintegrate anyway from the strain and the despair of not doing it.
In the past week or two since getting the referral letter I've come to realize that I can't really contain my compulsion to do this, and I've come to really fear myself because I don't think I can prevent myself from transitioning, even though I'm disgusted at myself for wanting it and feel so much shame. It's to the point where I have started to seriously consider that I may need to commit suicide to prevent myself from doing it. I don't want to die, but I'm starting to think more and more that dying may be the only way to retain some little piece of my dignity. To be stronger than giving in to this, even if it kills me. Like... I can't take back having told the friends I've already come out to, but at least I can die with the dignity of knowing I didn't give in and do something that I know is disgusting and shameful and insane. Better to die than to live with that shame. That's how I really feel lately.
But I don't want to die... So please, someone, help me. I need advice on how to forget about this. I want to bury it. I want everything to go back to how it was before, because I know it worked then. I didn't -need- this before, so how is it not insane to pretend I -need- it now? No.
Please give me any advice you possibly can on how to kick this crazy out of my head. Please just help me bury it before I end up in a casket, because that's the only other way I'm going to stop myself. I can't live with feeling so ashamed anymore. I can't.
If people are saying you sound cis, you probably sound cis, honestly. There's a lot of subtle stuff that people will pick the fuck up on immediately if you don't. As long as you sound fine, there's (probably) nothing wrong with doing it in a different way.
Hm. I can kind of think of a way to explain this maybe.
So, when you force it down, are you sort of feeling the back half of your tongue move back and down?
If so, try doing the opposite, try to push the center and back of your tongue up, towards the roof of your mouth, pushing the front of your tongue towards your teeth. Then from there try to do it with just the back of your tongue, then just the lower back of your tongue. Eventually you should be able to train yourself to move the same muscles in your throat WITHOUT moving your tongue up. I don't know shit for technical terms, but I hope you can kind of see what I'm getting at. I think that's kind of how I got the hang of it, uh, all I know is I learned to move my adam's apple around from shaving my neckbeard off over and over.
This is probably going to sound a tad wishy-washy, but there's a thing in bodybuilding known as the mind-muscle connection; the idea that as you use a muscle more, your brain finds more ways to use that muscle and better ways to use it. In other words, the more you practice using the muscles in your throat, the better your brain will get at singling out specific muscles. Since all voice work is is doodling muscles about, imo, the more you try out different things with your throat, the better you will be at specific things with it. Or something. Play around, basically.
My internet cut out for a bit. Here.
Even if I were recognized and outed, I guess that would save me the trouble of coming out and all that. (Oh god no please don't do that.)
It's an old photo but I have a tendency to look awful on photos when I'm looking at the camera.
Please dude, talk to your therapist about this. Be open and honest and tell them all of this.
Random anonymous fuckheads like myself are not a good substitute for therapy and I am sure as hell not comfortable weighing in on your issues. Your therapist is trained and paid to do exactly that.
Just because you could deal with something before doesn't mean you were always going to be able to cope. If you're trans, you probably were going to have to face it one way or another. So far, I've never heard of a single person managing to cure themselves through therapy.
On the other hand, some people do transition and detransition so who knows? Maybe starting your transition will make you realize that you're fine. Maybe starting your transition will make you a lot happier and you'll see it through.
Kinda an odd question.
I need new glasses. I am not out yet, but will have to wear them for the next year at least, during which time I would like to come out.
Any advice for choosing androgynous glasses? Specifically glasses that complement feminine features for an mtf but aren't over-the-top femme where it would look out of place in boymode.
Buy two pairs? Otherwise, when you're looking at frames, choose a pair that complement feminine features for an mtf but aren't over-the-top femme where it would look out of place in boymode.
Don't have the money, and I don't think insurance covers 2 pair, although I will have to check. And I don't really know what to look for.
Thing is, I don't really know what my face type is and stuff. Guess it was a pretty stupid question since I don't really know what I want, and I don't want to post a pic. Maybe off to the internet to research and try to figure it out this time.
depends on your genetics. 20 is almost definitely not too late. You might not look 100% cis if you don't have good genetics, but you probably won't look like a dad in a wig. Testosterone keeps developing your face to look more masc well into your 20s and even 30s and 40s.
Before I start spamming pictures, would it be okay if I posted a few pictures from different profiles so you guys could tell me if I have any chance of passing after 'mones. Also, what surgeries I'll probably need to pass.
Another MtF anon here.
I have a bit of a square-ish face (rather defined jew and slightly larger nose). What do you think would work for me?
What I had in mind were some semi round/square frames with a black frame that's about half a centimeter thick.
Opinions are better than nothing, especially if they come from some sort of experience.
I don't see why you couldn't pass. How old are you? You'll probably pass a lot better when you can grow your hair out and lose a lot of the muscle you seem to have.
The hard thing to accept is that we'll probably never be 100% feminine, and a few of your features will always look masculine (maybe your nose? I'm not really sure). You could spend a fortune on surgeries to fix them, but in reality, many cis girls have some masculine features too. Passing isn't always about one individual feature - the combination of features you have will mean that you will pass if enough of you is feminine and the rest just adds character.
>is there any way to make some kind of mask that would look real
I... wut? Maybe try not worrying about it so much. You don't need something that drastic, and I don't really know if it is possible. There are realistic masks, but it would be bizarre to basically live in one.
And surgery will fix a lot, even if you are really masculine, def won't make you look like a drag queen. The hope is always to be able to pass without surgery, but surgery will fix most people. At 20 you have a good chance of passing without surgery, and surgery will probably make you pass if not.
In some places, sure. There are over 190 countries in the world anon, and the answer won't be the same for all of them.
Most online places in europe are apparently asking for prescriptions now. If you're in the US, look into informed consent. If you're in the UK, go to your GP right now, it's a long enough process there.
>not wanting to look like a drag queen
Yes. Either use informed consent or buy off the net, but for gods sake make sure you read around before you do it and make sure you get bloodwork checked.
Possibly. That "whatever" expression makes it hard to say, but if you grew your hair out you'd have a much better idea (or you know, photoshop some hair on).
Nose Surgery. Either that's just a bad angle, or yeah you need it.
Otherwise you should be OK
Apparently it can give you conical boobs. Nobody wants conical boobs.
Real talk though, a low dose over a long period is what causes change. High dosages are wasted. How high are you talking?
Really? But I like my nose...
15 y/o here. Realized I'm MtF, and I want to start HRT while still developing so that my body will have a better chance at looking more feminine, but I 'm not ready to come out. Very conflicted right now, what should I do?
Hi, a few questions:
I bought a home IPL thing and it's recommended to use once every 2 weeks, could I speed it up by using it every week or few days?
How high up should you shave the "sideburns" or whatever to be more like a female's natural growth there?
And, is it possible to get a prescription from a general practitioner or do you have to go through a therapist? I don't have much money but I've been selfmedding for 3 months now and I'm getting worried about my health so I'd like to see a doctor and I just want the cheapest and easiest way.
DO it, please please do it. Every MtF will tell you the same thing, that they wish they had started earlier. If I could redo even just one part of my life it would have been when I was going to come out at 14 like when I first started thinking this was a big deal, instead of ending up putting all this off until I was almost 22. Trust me, you will get a LOT more masculine very quickly if you're 15.
Even if you're not ready to come out, just tell your parents you want to see a therapist or something. You can tell your therapist and they won't tell your parents, but eventually he or she might be able to do a joint session of some kind and help you come out.
Come out to your parents first. If you're in the UK though, you should be able to see your GP confidentially. Treatment, though, will require you to go to the AGIC which is in London. If you're not in the UK, idk what to tell you, but start treatment soon. You may need to be 16 or 18, but you might be able to get on the waiting list before then and at least if you have things in progress, you can waste less time.
High school could well be hell though. Have you got good, close friends?
I think I have a close friend who would be accepting, but I'm not sure. I very much fear social isolation. And although I do have one friends who may be accepting, I fear other will not, and that my accepting friend will be shunned for accepting it.
The people in my town are quite generally right wing.
My father is also sort of Right Wing and I need a good way to tell how accepting he would be of it before I tell him. Not because I need him acceptance, just because I'd rather have him not know than for him to know and not support me.
I would feel better coming out to my mother, but she's not my legal guardian so I don't think she could help with the transition.
>Please dude, talk to your therapist about this. Be open and honest and tell them all of this.
It's just difficult, because honestly I wonder how it would even help.
'Cause like, everyone's told me that this isn't really something you can 'cure'... So what am I expecting? For the therapist to talk me out of it?
The thing is, I've never stopped wanting to transition through any of this. I know I want it. But I loathe myself for it and I feel so ashamed for wanting it. And the part of my brain that keeps telling me "you're disgusting! you're mentally ill!" keeps telling me "if you transition you'll just fuck your life up and end up regretting it! you'll realize you didn't really want this! you'll feel awful about it and wish you could take it back!"
I don't believe that now, but I'm so afraid that it'll come true, and it's just impossible to get around the combination of the horrible shame and that. It makes me want to suicide just to be able to keep from humiliating myself by coming out and transitioning. "At least people will know you'd rather be dead than crazy, and they'll respect you for having the willpower to do that to save yourself from doing something stupid", the thought goes.
General Practitioner. They're basically your go to doctor for anything that doesn't require going to Accident and Emergency or calling an ambulance.
I think the US equivalent is a family doctor?
You're going to have to come out to your parents at some point. You're either going to have to wait until you're independent and move out which means holding off on HRT while test slowly makes your body more masculine, or you're going to have to take the difficult conversations with parents, risk of social isolation and stigma, risk of rejection by friends etc.
It sucks, but look at it this way, you're 3-7 years ahead of most people in your position. Even if you wait 3 years until highschool is over, you're in the same position as a lot of girls who don't transition until adulthood. If you choose to transition now, you're likely to have a better outcome. If you transition later, you're likely to have a good outcome.
I'd recommend you write it out and not because I'll definitely still be here to see it and not because anyone will definitely be able to offer good advice, but because I think being able to tell your story to the internet might help you clarify things in your head.
And someone might offer you some great advice. Who knows?
Treatment for gender dysphoria aims to help people with the condition live the way they want to, in their preferred gender identity.
What this means will vary from person to person, and is different for children, young people and adults. Your specialist care team will work with you on a treatment plan that is tailored to your needs.
Treatment for children and young people
If your child is under 18 and thought to have gender dysphoria, they will usually be referred to a specialist child and adolescent Gender Identity Clinic (GIC).
Currently, the only specialist clinic for young people with gender identity issues is run by the Tavistock and Portman NHS Foundation Trust in London, although they occasionally provide satellite clinics in other parts of the country.
Staff at these clinics can carry out a detailed assessment of your child, to help them determine what support they need.
Depending on the results of this assessment, the options for children and young people with suspected gender dysphoria can include:
individual child psychotherapy
parental support or counselling
group work for young people and their parents
regular reviews to monitor gender identity development
hormone therapy (see below)
Your child’s treatment should be arranged with a multi-disciplinary team (MDT).
Most treatments offered at this stage are psychological, rather than medical or surgical. This is because the majority of children with suspected gender dysphoria do not have the condition once they have reached puberty. Psychological support, therefore, offers young people and their families a chance to discuss their thoughts and receive support to help them cope with the emotional distress of the condition, without rushing into more drastic treatments.
That's from the UK's NHS website, just to give you an idea of what will happen. You probably won't transition until you're older, but you can start treatment now.
Wrong section, sorry, I meant to post this
If your child has gender dysphoria and they have reached puberty, they could be treated with gonadotrophin-releasing hormone (GnRH) analogues. These are synthetic (man-made) hormones that suppress the hormones naturally produced by the body.
Some of the changes that take place during puberty are driven by hormones. For example, the hormone testosterone, which is produced by the testes in boys, helps stimulate penis growth.
As GnRH analogues suppress the hormones that are produced by your child’s body. They also suppress puberty and can help delay potentially distressing physical changes caused by their body becoming even more like that of their biological sex, until they are old enough for the treatment options discussed below.
GnRH analogues will only be considered for your child if assessments have found that they are experiencing clear distress and have a strong desire to live as their gender identity.
The effects of treatment with GnRH analogues are considered to be fully reversible, so treatment can usually be stopped at any time after a discussion between you, your child and your MDT.
Hey I'm 23, MtF, I just recently started T blockers and I'll be starting E in a month or so. My hairline has receded a bit, I was wondering if anyone's ever experienced any hairline regrowth from hormones alone. If not, what other options do I have? Hopefully not just transplantation or wearing a wig... growing out my natural hair over the last year has done wonders for my self-image.
I live in the Us, not UK. Got any US info?
I think a good way to tell my story is chronologically. Well most embarrassingly, my earliest memories related to interest in my sisters tampons/maxipads, as I thought I would one day get my period. I spent a bit of time in the basement when I wasn't playing outside, because that computer and entertainment system were down there. Also in the basement were the clothes, and I remember some sort of fascination with my sisters underwear, but not whether or not I wore them, though I think I did. I think this because I believe my big sister knew about it and made some sort of joke about it, and I had forgotten about this for years only just remember a week or too ago. I wish I hadn't though, It's really embarrassing, even anonymously on the internet :/ Those fascinations subsided for a few years.
I also remember I my older sister having a bracelet with her boyfriends name on it, and I picked on her for it when I was fairly young, maybe around 7. She told me if I kept picking on her, she would paint my nails as a joke. I pretended thy I didn't want that, but I kept on picking on her because I secretly did. I liked the idea.
About 3 years ago, I started taking my sisters clothes and cross dressing late a night when I knew I wouldn't get caught. I masturbating wearing, but after I orgasmed, I feel repulsed by them. I later started sleeping in girls clothes too, and experimenting with make-up. Then about a year later, I realized that when I watched porn, I put myself in the females position a vast majority of the time. About a year ago, my sister had found the know new I had taken their clothes. There's chance my older sister thinks I'm gay, well she's half right I guess. Everyone in my immediate family knows, but no one has said anything serious about it, I was just forced to return anything I had taken.
Then a while ago, something weird happened. Before, I had only imagined myself or fantasized about being with females or other traps. But something weird happened. About the time I had finally come out to myself as transsexual, I also became very into his entirety, not just male genitalia. I also realized that there's always been some weird aspects about my, such as a (fairly well hidden) emotional instability. I can cry very easily about things that I know I logically should care that much about. I'm also bit jealous of other woman for their feminine appearance because I don't think I'll ever look like that.
I'm also a very studious person, and one of the things I study often is psychology. I was just recently explaining to a friend that causes of homosexualism and transsexualism, and he didn't seem shaken at it by all, so I think he would be someone who's accepting. I definitely know of other people who are accepting. But I don't know if my sad never mentions it because he thinks I would talk about it if I wanted to, or he pretends it didn't happen.
Recently, I had been doubting that I was transsexual and that it was just autogynephilia. But I think writing this has convinced me otherwise.
Not yet, but in a semi-prestigious school for engineering and technology as a CS major. Pretty much the whole CS industry doesn't give a shit. I don't think that other math/science fields really care either. Feelsgood.bmp
But it will probably be more difficult in more blue-collar jobs or in more business related stuff.
This is more about me being socially incompetent rather than transgender, but how should I set up a consultation with a therapist? Can I just email them (I have one in mind) and ask when they're available? Should I mention anything about myself in the email, or leave that for in-person?
Ask your doctor about getting on finasteride or rogaine. In the mean time you can use a DHT reducing shampoo like T-Gel. Female hormones alone aren't strong enough quick enough to deplete the built up DHT in your hair follicles.
If they accept email, then yes, you can mention why you're seeking treatment with them. Keep it as brief as you can in an introductory anything. For reference, I found an LGBT friendly therapist with specialties in a bunch of different things including gender issues so in my phone call (voice message) I stated my name, asked if they were accepting new clients, insurance, and said I was having difficulty with depression, a chronic illness and some gender identity troubles, and left a call back number. That was enough to get me in. Keep it as brief and precise as you can.
if they have email, yes.
I normally set my psych appointments by calling.
Just say something like "Hi, I'd like to set up an appointment to see [doctor's name]". and then they will ask you details.
>How high up should you shave the "sideburns"
as far as they are sideburns. females don't have sideburns.
>And, is it possible to get a prescription from a general practitioner
usually not, you most likely will need to have gone to a therapist.
>I bought a home IPL thing and it's recommended to use once every 2 weeks
it's recommended for a reason, for the skin to heal/regenerate because laser is pretty harsh. just keep to it every two weeks.
transitioning is a selfish act anon, that's just how it is. Becoming yourself is worth the shame you might get from others.
>Everyone in my immediate family knows, but no one has said anything serious about it
They will see it coming, either you coming out as gay or trans. Is probably a question of when for them rather than why.
Tell your friend.
If their nose is bad then I'm fucked.
Also, Will I pass? 1 month HRT
>But I think writing this has convinced me otherwise.
Then you know what to do. Delaying coming out to your friend and your family will make it all take longer. You're eventually going to have to come out and start treatment.
It's hard to tell what your face shape is like with that hat on, but I don't see why not. I highly doubt you'll need a nose job or many surgery. Your jaw looks naturally soft, which is good. What's your hairline like?
I want to die but I'm too much of a pussy to kill myself. I don't have the strength to endure transition when I'm just gonna end up a turbohon but I couldn't just take skittles for mental health and never socially transition either, that'd kill me just as much as doing nothing at all. There is no happy way out
I'm in a bit of a confusing situation here. Here's some facts to preface. I've been in a LDR with someone for a few months now and we're meeting 3 weeks from now, and I'll be staying with her for 2 weeks before I return home. We're both MtF. I've been on HRT for 10 months now and can't pass for male anymore, not even in boymode. She's pre-hrt, but she'll be starting mones in a couple months. Neither of us have strong genital dysphoria, although both of us plan on getting SRS eventually.
Okay, now, my main question is regarding sex+sexual orientation... I'm bi, I don't have any qualms with someone's sex or gender, but my girlfriend is exclusively into women. When it comes to thoughts/doubts about our relationship it always comes down to the simple fact that I have a cock, and that she's not into that. But still, she says she can work through it. Okay, whatever, she can live with it, and she's perfectly okay with fucking me and using her cock in whatever way, so sex can still work.
However, this is where I get confused. There's been a couple of times where she talks about wanting me to fuck her (meaning I'd be topping, which is whatever. Not ecstatic about it but I would still do it) and has requested pictures of my cock. But of course most of the time she makes it sound like the fact that I have a cock is a problem. What the hell? I try not to talk about it or bring it up cause the topic tends to bum her out.
So, since I'm visiting her very soon, how should I prepare myself in that sense? What could I expect? I really do get the sense that she's not into dick... But why on earth did she want to see mine?
I fee so ugly. I thought i had a good shot of being pretty but everyone lied to me. I feel so ugly. Hormones only show me how far away i am from looking female. I was an attractive guy, this isn't fair. Im pretty sure if this never changes i will end up killing myself cause im that shallow and pathetic.
You already know the answer to that question. Nobody on the internet can tell you what is right for you.
Why don't you start by writing out your story? That seems to help a lot of people.
Maybe because she's bicurious and doesn't want to admit it? Or maybe because she doesn't like the idea of it and seeing it might make it better?
When she said she wanted you to fuck her, did she mean like PIV? or did she mean like lesbians say fuck?
told my mom when i was 18/19. She wanted me to take a look at my options and experience life before i made my choice. she constantly uses male pronouns even though i told her i wanted her to stop that (there's my little man or shit like that) I'm now 21 and have an appointment set up with a psychiatrist this Tuesday. She doesn't know but I'll probably sit her down some time after. she was supportive at the time but she hasn't made an effort to help me with it so I'm making the effort and hopefully she takes that extra step to meet me halfway. would be helpful to have family support. best of luck anon!
What did you expect her to do? Make your appointments for you?
You told her, and then apparently waited around 2 years before making an appointment. Ofc she doubted you and wanted to return to how things were. You've gotta earn support by showing you're serious about this, and then if they don't support you, fuck 'em, you'll find people who will.
So I tried to do a girlmode today at 5.5 months of HRT but I couldnt find the courage to go outside
I know that I dont pass but do you think this is a decent place to start? I know not to expect a miracle before 1 year of HRT
posture would help, your neck seems to be leaning a little too far forward. arms seem a little buff, that position makes your calves look enlarged. ffs might help, a lot of this is just posture and clothes selection. try to get something in a neutral zone not insta dresses. hate to be so negative but i hope i helped in some strange way. best of luck to you and yeah i'd say your doing good so far.
hey that's similar to my dress!
if you wanna wear a dress though, i'd get one that goes over your shoulders, like mine.
also don't be afraid to go a size bigger than you actually are, i found that it's quite useful for fitting larger shoulders
My story isn't interesting it's just
>figure out i'm bi in like 9th grade
>couple years later think I might be trans
>after a while I feel dysphoric a lot
>I want to transition if I can pass but if I end up looking like a man in woman's clothing i don't want to so now I have to figure out if it's worth it to transition
You look fine. You don't pass 100%, but you easily pass enough to go outside without people screaming cute at you. Mostly, you should wear make up (I can't tell if you are) because that'll improve your skin and make you look more feminine and you should also sort your hair. That middle part gives you a large forhead. Straight or side swept bangs would make you look much better!
Honestly, you're not that far off passing though. You might not think you look like an amazingly cute girl, but then most girls don't look like that. If you define passing as looking like a girl from a magazine, you'll never be happy.
What's the best diet and excerize routine to get a femme figure? im 22 not very manly or hairy yet but more and more is starting to grow. I feel like im going through second puberty lol
only really admitted to myself that im trans recently and im looking for a therapist atm but unroll then I can't get hrt I guess. any advice?
Jesus I'm starting to feel like I only reply to posts about diet/exercise.
Honestly, diet won't do shit. No food on this earth is going to give you nice hips and tits. If you want to atrophy your muscles faster, do a lot of cardio and eat minimal protein. I'd recommend that you get skinny if you're not already (read the /fit/ sticky) before starting hormones and then gaining a bit of weight after a year+ on them. By that point your body should be basically going "oh, new energy to store, I'll put that on your hips, ass and boobs" which helps a lot.
There's not even much you can do via exercise, honestly. The best you're really going to get is maybe wider hips and definitely a nicer ass from squatting. If you can't be bothered with squats (and you should be bothered with squats, squat more do it), do hill sprints. Literally, sprint up hills. It'll help with your ass and it's also good cardio.
Apart from that, sorry, most body stuff comes down to genetics and how much hormones have an effect on your fat distribution. If you're super desperate, "waist training" is a thing, literally using corsets and the like to bend your lower ribs and gut area into a more feminine shape, but I'm not sure how willing I am to actually suggest that beyond telling you that it exists.
Has anyone in the UK self medicated? Is QHI still a good bet? How do I get my tests done? Seriously, can I just tell my GP to test my blood or will that affect my chances of getting treated by the system?
Can someone tell me if I'm 'trans' or if I just happen to be a brutish tomboy who likes doing masculine activites and interests and sometimes has benis envy? What's the difference? Am I supposed to be a guy? Am I a butch lesbian? Halp.
>You could always go on HRT without going full time and see if it helps with your body?
I am but there's only so much fat distribution can do when you've got ~18" shoulders and a 37" ribcage
Well, I'm attracted to men, so I'd have to be gay. If I could do anything at all without any repurcussions, [now that we're in fantasy land] I'd probably have a dual penis and vagina combo with no breasts. I'd also like people to stop looking at me and thinking 'female', though i don't care if they look at me and think 'male'.
I would like to be both, but I don't have enough sexual experience to say that, which is part of the reason why I haven't transitioned yet and why I'm still questioning myself. Maybe as I settle into a relationship I'll become more comfortable with myself or something. That's why I want other FTMs to tell me their experience so I can at least compare.
You either get like a 1-2 inch dick made out of your clit or a normal size "dick" with flesh fron a donor site that needs a pump in the balls to get hard. That's not worth shelling out tons of money to me.
I'm only on estrogen fo about 50 days now and my face looks really bony and there's no more fat in it, how long before I will start to look normal again? I have another doctors appointment with a new doctor hopefully one give me spiro and finasteride in about 25 days. I've noticed it seems that most people have this weird transition who are male to female and they look like skeletons because they're fat disappears or something
there's probably an inch or two of fat in that rib measurement too since i'm overweight atm so it could get a little lower. they just feel massive
i hate the shit out of my shoulders, i want to take to them with a belt sander
it's just like, that kinda stuff on top of man hands/feet, the whole guy no hips thing, an uncomfortable height (5'9", which I know is nothing compared to the 6'+ers but still makes me half a head taller than my mother and sister) combine to make it feel futile
So, I recently had a discussion with my father about transgender people, and he said that the whole ordeal was really selfish... Now, my father is probably the most understanding person I know. I'm MtF, and really want to come out cause the dysphoria is killing me inside, but my family as a whole is super transphobic, what do?
Is it okay to be a trans guy who "crossdresses?" I dress masculine like 99% of the time but sometimes for special occasions I like to doll it up as much as possible. I still pick dresses/binders/bras that hide my breasts and hips as well as possible. I'm pre-everything and I'm worried that this means I'm a freak or not really trans, even though I feel strong gender dysphoria with my body.
You're both just miserable, like most 'trans' people. You could try mindfulness meditation, travel, working out. Take a risk and get a part time job? It gives you a shitton of confidence.
Unfortunately from what I hear some people transition, and find themselves ugly, infertile and possibly without a penis, and still feel unsatisfied.
You could try religion too. It doesn't have to be your Conservative Baptist church. Quakers are very accepting and mild mannered.
It makes me sad to see everyday shy gay people transitioning because of a fetish.
>cure your severe medical disorder with the power of chai tea, gay cock, navel gazing pretentiousness and Jesus
Thanks but no thanks. Something tells me you're simply not capable of comprehending just how stupid and pseudo-intellectual you sound when you say things like this.
>But the first months are were most changes happen right?
Ehh...no? The first few months not much happens. the first three hardly anything happens besides soft skin and breast budding. Most changes happen after that in a span of a year or longer.
Im sitting right on the edge of making the choice. Been talking to psychologist for about 7 weeks now about transitioning but its hard to just make that choice to go foward. Im 30 now and know chances arnt great of turning out well, luckily I dont have a really masculine face/body so thats a start, and I know it is possible to transition at my age.
Im just scared of making the wrong choice, like maybe I could just keep going as is? Psychologist says im just finding reasons not to as opposed to reasons to which is true.
Im scared of ruining what life I do have which admittedly isnt great, by going through with transitioning. Telling family, friends, housemates, employers etc, im not a really mentally strong person to just say "this is who I am, deal" so yea just scared.
How did you all make the final choice? like was it n event or something that tipped favor 1 way or another?
it's atleast worth a try anon, if it doesn't work out or you find out hormones are not for you you can always go off them.
>How did you all make the final choice?
I can't see myself growing old as male. and i get tired of putting on this faqade for society, while i feel that person i am presenting as is not me.
I'd hate to cause a big fuss over nothing, possibly lose people because of it. I sometimes feel like earlier post about it being selfish, im asking everyone else to adjust to me rather than me adjusting to them.
But yea I cant see myself growing old as a guy , I wish I had not denyed all these years though, im pretty scared of not passing which I know is kind of petty but its still worrying.
I worry about everything.
also, don't crane your neck out. Try to stand almost like at attention and then relax, but bend more to the side than to the front or back. The relaxing part is important, don't force any bends. Your shoulders should be back some, and that will make them look smaller, but again don't force, just keep them as far back as is possible without having to hold them in place.
Shift your weight back a little, and it helps to keep the position. Your gravity (idk what to call it) should be on your hips, not chest or shoulders. Put a little more weight on your hips and heels. It will also make you slightly less stable, like you could be pushed over more easily, but that is what you want. Also will make your hips more prominent.
When you lean back on something like that, you want the contact points to the wall to be your butt and shoulders, not actually your spine. Your spine either should not touch the wall or should at least not bear much weight. If you are looking down at something like a phone while leaning on the wall, you should turn your head very slightly to the side and down instead of straight down, and preferably to the side that has the least weight. Even more preferable to use the hand on the side that has the most weight and cross it over to the less-weighted side.
overall, in any situation, your body should be less bent into a c shape, and your back should almost always be pretty straight, even if legs are out in front.
But be careful not to exaggerate it.
Just wondering how normal a 32" ribcage is, like at underbust. Closer to 33" at actual bust, but I have some boob growth, so idk if that is skewing it. 36-30-32 hip-waist-underbust. Used to be more like 34-28-32, but gained some weight because my cheeks were gaunt (and very happy with what gaining some weight did for my face).
It would make sense that smaller chest relative to hip and waist would be good, but I feel like it looks LESS feminine and attractive without as much of a curve going from chest to waist, even though there is a bigger difference from chest to hips.
I keep hearing contradictory stuff. Like some people saying it is normal male and some saying it is normal female. And the averages are all over the place.
guess ill just not worry about it. I think the main problem is that my chest is flat and bony which makes it look bigger, but that should change as I gain more weight and my breasts fill out more.
I finally found some jeans that hide my ugly birthing hips, except I also look like I'm swimming in them and I hate myself more. I feel like I'll never be able to be a hot guy and I should just kill myself.
I'm a femanon. I worry if I'm trans or not. I used to have plans to transition but lately that's gone away. I reverted back to the way I was when I was 10 or 11; I wanna be quite masculine but still considered a woman, and I like crossdressing.
I used to have dysphoria about my chest and voice. Now I'm not sure. Do I hate breasts or hate how big I am? I can't tell anymore. Hopefully I get this figured out before I finish college.
IKTF, Anon. Also 30 and on that same precipice. Spent pretty much all of my 20s thinking I was a mere closeted CDer, but still pondering in the back of my head if I still might be trans. Saw a trans psych, turns out I'm trans. Oh yay... Oh well, I'm willing to put in the effort if I have to in order to avoid looking like a freak.
I'm pre-everything but seeing a therapist. I don't plan on living as a guy until I'm on T and can't pass as a girl most of the time.
I don't want to wear a binder but I have C cup breasts. Is there a way to hide them? Sports bras don't help and layering seems to make them look bigger
Yes, it's precum, preseminal fluid. As long as you're not still ejaculating full on white goo you're probably fine.
I've heard some MtFs still occasionally get some of that even after a good deal of time on hormones, personally I still ejaculate clear liquid after a year or so on them, my levels are fine and I've been told it's to do with taking Progesterone as part of HRT, but I've also heard of transwomen who have no ejaculate whatsoever after around the same time.
If you're that worried talk to your endo but no that sounds about normal.
So I want to come out as trans, but I don't know about the costs of hormones and whatnot.
It seems like that kind of thing should be free if I have like, healthcare and stuff. Either way, I'm 16 and I live with my broke ass single father in Canberra so money isn't really something we have.
If I work some shitty job on weekends could I pay for it?
MtF here not on hormones or anything but wondering. If i go on hormones. what exactly will happen to my penis and balls? also my sex drive? i really enjoy my sex drive and masturbating and that. When i'm on hrt will i still be able to masturbate? or get horny? will it be worse orgasms? How hard is it to masturbate?
Your balls will shrink, your penis might atrophy a little too (though the extent of this seems to vary and it's largely a case of "use it or lose it"). Eventually you'll go sterile.
Spontaneous erections stop, but you can still get it up when aroused.
I'm going to selfmed, what are the best tips for doing so? I kinda wanna do it first before seeing a therapist (Which I eventually do want to do) because going through that now will probably delay my hrt for a long time and I want to start asap. How do I know what dosage to do? If I have to get a blood test is there anything special I should ask for or is it just 1 blood test that tells you everything? Like is there a hormonal blood test or something
I've been on E for 50 days now and I can still masturbate anytime I want. Its annoying and really sticky slimy now which is weird. But you should masturbate so that your dick muscles dont atrophy because your dick is what they use to make your vagina. I used to have a 7 inch dick but id say its like 5-6 now. Its hard to measure because the instant I stop masturbating, it starts to get soft. MASTURBATE OR YOU WONT HAVE A NORMAL CAVERNOUS VAGINA TO TAKE ALL THE DICKS.
>i bought some clothes online the other day
>mom came home
>"i found something and me and you need to talk"
>(she probably found a tag or something)
>figure "o well i was kinda hoping someone would find me out and i could just come clean."
>she wanted to talk about it tomorrow(later today)
knowing me it could be a plethora of crazy shit she found and it could all be in my head that shes found me out. ( i got a bag full of porno dvds i got from some girl that broke up with her boyfriend and just gave the bag to me, etc. etc.)
I'll probably let her know about it either way, i do got an appointment with a psychiatrist coming up so i guess I'll just tell her ahead of my planned time. i am an adult now so if worst comes to worst I'll just suck it up and find my own place.
she finished with
>"i just want you to know that i love you."
yeah she probably knows.
Was he talking about 40+ transitioners who ruin the family and everything? He might view people who haven't quite started their lives much different than those who have wife and kids.
>start HRT one month ago
>cant function in real life because of crippling anxiety and other issues and waiting for disability to come in. havent cried in 10 years
>poly girl i have liked for the past month seems to be getting more distant
>abandoned by family, living off friends couch who helped get me hormones for my birthday
>want to cry and hurt myself tonight but dont know why
>everyone i know is sleeping or doesnt want to talk to me
>paranoid about everything around me
>will never be able to function in the real world
HRT has helped me feel better but i just cant feel like the world will get any better. i cant stand mental illness
Well im not on any antiandrogens yet but it hasnt changed at all except for what I said. It might help that im a /d/ickgirl and could masturbate to a toaster if I had to for great justice.
yeah but judges dont respect written laws.
they make them up as is convenient.
they'll just be like prove you didnt open it and case closed
>pay $800 for a judge to write down in public record that you are a faggot and you get faggot things mailed to you
Even if you don't pass you would just feel better on them and could just still be a guy with smooth skin and such. Be a twink maybe. Then your only problems would be boobs and losing the ability to knock people up and your weiner would shrink a bit.
Is it normal for trans feelings to crop up in your 20s? It's making me question the validity of all this because in one of the links I read it said that there's two types: trans who feel dysphoria as young teenagers, and trans who feel it around their midlife crisis.
>Is it normal for trans feelings to crop up in your 20s?
around 20 is usually the point where people start wondering what they want to do with the rest of their lives. So no it's not that weird that you have trans feelings crop up around your 20s, heck most us us transition in their 20s.
And a higher and higher liklihood of suicide the longer you wait and the less liklihood of success the longer you wait. 30 is probably too late for 95% of people where you become Lauras' s playground
I realised it around 14, then tried to live normally but spoke about it with school councilor and started to hide it, had to wait until 18 to get into a psychiatrist who gave me antidepressants, spent years finishing school and being completely passive in every aspect but slowly preparing for transition and then finally started hrt at 23. Now I have a decent life, I pass mostly (there are always some who screen you and voice) and I don't think it would have made a massive difference if I started hormones at 20 or so as puberty was pretty much done at that point. Of course it's better to start as early as possible but I'd say 25 is still a good age to start.
so i have an unsupportive family so i am doomed to fail? really the 30% is your ability to pass without being clocked but chances are if you pass even for the most part anyone who even does clock you will be nice about things. i personally never found any real hate outside of the internet against me. i found more dressed as a guy than as a girl. life is what you make it. i have a plethora of mental illness unrelated to being trans, but transitioning was not even remotely the hardest thing for me to deal with. i always thought it would scare me and i would have to live my life in fear people would find out. but actually i am more calm, less depresed and i dont even think about myself as trans anymore. taking the first step is the hardest. but in the end it is kinda the easiest decision you can make
what happens if you feel not better as trans?
I am attracted to girls, 30-50% of my time i being okay with my gender, 50-70% i am not :(
i dont want to get touched by anybody
massive pain because of cutting your most senistive part
my family is the only social aspect in my life
I am living on a friend i met on the internets couch, i am only interested in girls, have social anxiety through the roof and was diagnosed with Aspergers when i was younger, my family told me they would rather see me living on the street than with them and sometimes i have to wear a swim suit in the shower because of dysphoria. the fact is that the one thing i learned about dysphoria is that you are "ok" with being male but you never prefer it really. you want to be female some of the time and otherwise you dont care what you are. those ok times are not in favor of not transitioning they are just neutral. either way you come out still wanting to transition. HRT was a scary thing, deciding to want to transition was even more frighting. but its more of a fear of the unknown than anything. my first month on HRT was amazing. i dont know if it was because of any effects but so much weight felt like it was lifted. i felt like i was able to get on with my life and not try to revolve everything in my life around being trans. i am not going to lie and say everything has gotten better or my dysphoria is at a 0 now. but its more managable that i could have ever hoped for. i can watch TV now without getting depressed any time a see a character have implied sex, or feel a deep pain any time i see a woman pregnant.
in retrospect my biggest regret is not doing it sooner. but we cannot hold that over ourselves and once i took the leap. the fear of transition i had before seemed like a stupid fucking thing
go informed consent. its actually cheep as hell if you can find a place. my spiro script is $7 a month and my estrogen was about $55 for half a year of shots including syringes and everything. its better to do informed consent and its not that expensive depending on where you live. they also will not gate keep you at all
i realised it at 7. And i wasn't able to do anything about it until i was 32. which is the worst situation because i've known my whole life. And yet not been able to do anything about it.
suicide seems like a really good plan.
I'm going to be 22 soon and I'm obese. I haven't done anything yet and I’m not 100% sure I want to, but I have been trying to lose weight first. I've been keeping it a secret but my mom has noticed that I've been eating differently.
Should I just tell her about it now? I think she would probably take it well and maybe even be supportive. But I’m still kind of scared to admit it to myself, let alone to someone else.
I'm FtM 22 year old. I just moved out of my family house. I'm finally able to start shopping for men's clothing, especially underwear. What's a food store for men's boxer briefs that aren't too expensive? Thanks in advance. I'm really new to all of this, but I really want to pass as a male.
i dont have one
>Obsessive–compulsive personality disorder
>Schizoid personality disorder
>massive fear of social things
>living in an assisted living for mental ill ppl
if i would crossdress too, i think it would be to much for a possible gf
Thanks. I usually wear fitted tops with my binder and baggy jeans. I just can't stand all my female underwear. Makes it feel weird to put those garments on. I just want to buy boxer briefs in a pack for a good deal, since I'm starting on buying undies from scratch.
How does medication work with blood pressure? Spiro decreases blood pressure but estrogen increases it? I usually dont measure my blood pressure but I did today and it was 145/90 (considered hbp). Does this mean i can't do hrt?
I have had similar disorders in the past, but transitioning has helped reduce the amount they affect me if it all.
Also what do you girls think about progesterone? I've been hearing lately that it counteracts E and isn't very beneficial. I've been on it for 4 months, 100mg twice daily and am wondering if I should quit taking it or possibly cycling it.. Anybody have any knowledge on this?
checking back in.
after what seemed like she was putting off our talk we got around to it. Went to jamba juice and sat in a parking lot talking. she brought out an order form from the clothing i bought. (it must of fallen behind the trashcan) she had like 20 questions that i answered. mostly stuff like
>"do you like girls?"
>"do you like boys?"
>"how far into this are you? is it just cross dressing?"
i was as open as i could be just answering any question that was thrown at me.
she's been very supportive and she started to tear up and i almost teared up and had this awful grin i get when ever im put in an awkward situation but i was also kind of relieved and happy.
she tried to make a joke every now and again like
> "I'll hurt you if you look better in girls clothing than i do"
but than she'd say things like
>"no matter what you choose to be you'll always be my little boy"
which i understand I'm not gonna get her to change the way she's seen me for the past 21 years. but seems like she's supportive of my choice to transition.
looks like i got my mom to support me on this so that's cool. now i can start getting a handle on my life. maybe I'll buy some cute socks now.