Monster Girl Thread

I've got it bad, so bad.

I'm hot for teacher

>>14764787
I was just about to start a thread using that exact same image. Good on you, anon.

>3 threads
>almost made a 4th

>>14764787
>3 threads up
Everytime with you people.

>>14764796
This is funny.

>>14764802
Well shit, which one do we use.

>>14764812
Stick to this one. It came first, plus there seems to be activity here.

>>14764808
Looking at how things are now, if my thread would've been made some shit would be kinda catastrophic.

This thread was created first, so use this one and report the others, the mods will take care about it.

>>14764812
The one that came before all of them and used the new girl?

What would monstergirls do for Valentine's Day?

>>14764812
this one has the new girl so I say this one

>>14764827
Proactive dating?

...I mean, more than usual.

>>14764820
This one also features the new girl as the OP image.

>>14764747
Just don't use the word "censoring" ever again. And yeah, I'm censoring you.

>>14764827
Rape, but instead of just raping the guy they break into his house and get the mood right with candles and incense and a few manticore barbs.

>>14764837
No chocolate?

>>14764825
Dragon Bride OP here. I agree. This came first and has new girl, so... But dang, I've never seen 3 at once before. I was wondering what was taking so long.

>>14764839
Chocolate rape~

The threads always die when we're having the most interesting talks.

To carry on, the monsters in YBA's setting are unsustainable and had it coming when then tried to invade Earth. It isn't like they'd be more sustainable here with their inability to produce males and their constant breeding like rabbits.

>>14764834
You bastard scallywag.

>>14764839
That's for in between rounds 5 and 6

>>14764843
Happens every now and then. Don't worry about it.

>>14764843
Lich OP here. Sorry, I didn't see the others. If I could delete my thread I would.

>>14764848
pls no more

>>14764848
I wish YBA would expand on the downfall of the Dragoon, since we know full well what happens to them in Greystorm and the like.

>>14764846
>have slime waifu
>she "eats" a whole case of chocolate syrup
>she then surprises you with 'a chocolate flavored wife'
>it takes weeks to get her back to her normal self

>>14764848
I imagine it would be pretty easy to make some dosh in that world as a human male.

So, what's the name of the new girl?
I was asleep when she came out.

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best elemental

I want a hakutaku to laugh at my tiny penis!
I want her to learn that dicks really can be that small!
I want her to be amazed at this new discovery!

>>14764848
I wouldn't put it past the earthers in that setting to have vault tier purposes to the few cities they give the monstergirls.

>>14764869
Hakutaku.

>>14764869

Hakutaku

Lewd teacher MG basically

>>14764869
Hakutaku

>>14764860
You mean actually interesting talks as opposed to
>your waifu a shit
or
>my fetish is being oppressed!
Come on, man.

>>14764867
Totally I would do the way that on anon wrote and git gud at massaging MGs and open up my own parlor that specializes in happy endings for all of my customers.
The happy endings all include me knocking them up and raising my own army of daughterus to take back the holy lands.

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>>14764870
That's not Ignis

>>14764880
I will help you in your quest. Partners? No, not that sort of partners. The business kind.

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>>14764871

>>14764871
What could we ever do without you.

>>14764880
>>14764885
You have my bow.

>>14764875
>>14764874
>>14764877

So now we've got Keine as a monster girl?
I'm OK with this.

>>14764889
That's Space Jins stuff isn't it.

>>14764901
Yes

>>14764893
Keine isn't the progenitor of every Hakutaku ever.

>>14764883
That's right, I didn't post shit.
You should try doing the same.

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>>14764904
While I like the way the fucker draws his girls, I wish he didn't draw them crushing family jewels like water balloons most of the time.

>>14764901
He would be great if it weren't for that one flaw. That latest image set was good up to the last part.

>>14764885
>>14764892
Surely God will forgive me for fornicating with godless heathens once she sees my army of pious daughterus all screaming "DEUS VULT!" While marching over the bodies of dead Saracens.
My brothers God will not forget your honor today.

>>14764907
I know but she's the one I think of when discussing cow teachers.

>>14764910
>That's right, I didn't post shit.
You posted a magical dirt girl.

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>>14764907
Teacher-themed hakutakus kind of are, yeah. Hair is only a step away from being the same color. Even has the whole two-tone thing going.

>>14764921
Yes, and?

>>14764919
I wish I saved the picture of the paladin riding the bike that said "deus vult". What shall we call our parlor?

>>14764927
Your taste is quite literally dirt.

>>14764907
She is the most (in)famous one though

>>14764728
>Deathclaw MG
>tuft of hair peeking out over censor

Fear. But also arousal.

>>14764870
>Best Elemental
Except nobody except a shitty writer likes her

>>14764935
Deathclaws mutated from cougars. She is likely an older woman, looking for a good time.

>>14764939
>shitty writer
who?

i like tomasu's stuff

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Think we'll see a Turkish tickle monster?

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guys, I think I'm starting to like horse pussy

I'm scared...

>>14764968
Why fight it? S'cool

>>14764959
This just confirms that folklore monsters and shit are just peoples' fetishes made manifest.

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>>14764968
Don't be, let your heart guide you.

>>14764968
You shouldn't. Get better taste.

>>14764968
>>>/mlp/
>>>/trash/

I'm going to snuggle with a sumo kakuren and no one is going to stop me!

>>14764978
Well memed my friend.

>>14764958
Me too, especially the spider and bat doujins

>>14764959
I would be okay with being sold as a tickle-slave to one of these.

>>14764968
There's a pretty good reason why 99% of the stories involving centaurs on places like literotica are either dickgirl or male on h. female

>>14764979
I won't stop you, but I can still call you a weirdo.

>>14764987
That is perfectly fine.

>>14764984
The only design of his I dislike is the lamia with no arms.

>>14764794
That is very naughty and teacher will have to hold you after school. You fill be given one hour of study and then be quizzed on the Brahma Sutra.

>>14764787
This is the new girl? Fucking hell she looks boring. She's got the look of a gender studies student about her face. I regret shitting on flow kelp now.

>>14764993
Same

>>14764943
Cute!

>>14764996
No thanks I'd rather go study the lamia sutra with that chubby Apophis in my business classes.

>>14764958
So do I.

>>14765016
>She's got the look of a gender studies student about her face
In a way she is one.
I agree though, glasses are just a turn off, but maybe that's because I wear them. Who wants their kids to be guaranteed an annoying minor disability for life?

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Ah, to be partnered up with a girl like her when the student council commandeers one as manual labor! We got to stay in the school for several hours after the faculty had gone home, and while Anubis-chan and the others were in the art classroom, we were sent to the sports equipment shed to pick up some things. I had installed cameras in the shed long ago in the hopes I could one day lure a girl people were willing to pay to see, and now was my chance. I had to be quick, of course, and the initial product wouldn't be very interesting, but after I had her on film, I could blackmail her to coming there again, when he had more time and I had prepared some proper equipment. In any case, all I could smell that afternoon was money.

>>14765016
Yeah, she's pretty meh. We already have girls that can pull off the teacher/smart girl thing. Nothing about her stands out.

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>>14765016
>I regret shitting on flow kelp now.

Well they are pretty damn cute.

>>14764805
>>14764802

>woke up
>barely had any time to catch up on the old thread before it died
>typed up an obligatory thread OP featuring the new girl
>couldn't make the post, realized I forgot to turn off PIA
>turn it off and can't post it again because there was a delay before the captcha could work again and allow me to post
>finally get the captcha to work
>still manage to make this OP before everyone else

/mgt/ has to learn how to thread snipe.

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>>14765016
She's a smart Mist Continent Holstaur.

That, and she has a fair amount of mofu going on.

>>14765033
SERIAL SNIFFER!!!

Its obvious that the correct thing to do in MGC on valentines day is to go to a rock or punk concert and partake of the valentines orgypit.

>>14765054
>not finding a qt Monster girl and assaulting her in public with a combination of handholding and dick

>>14765047
Fuck off with your meme, this is obviously a guy preparing to rape someone on film and blackmailing her to become an unwilling porn-star.

>>14764939
who is this guy?
I haven't seen any gnome stories about

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Happy Valentine's Day! Again!
I just finished making and eating crepes, so I thought I'd post this as well.

>>14765070
Looks tasty.

>>14764978
well memed

I'm moving on from Vengeance to The Succubus Class President Won't Leave Me Alone. Lets see how this goes. So far so good. I enjoy the whole Succubus mind control thing, and just got past the saliva bit. A few typos, but its good thus far.

>>14765070
Looks comfy. Hopefully I can celebrate something too with my kraken waifu this year.

>>14765086
Sloth is dead, or at least I think he is.

>>14765044
I was also about to make a new thread, but I got lucky.

>>14765092
Doesn't change the fact that I am going to read it and get an opinion on it. Knowledge is power!

>>14765037
Exactly. You want smart? We have lich. You want big tits? We have holstaur. You want chinese dress? we have rens.
Nothing about her is that unique, other than knowing how to turn on monsters and that's as simple as having a dick to begin with anyway. On top of it her face is offensively bland.

>>14764958
I wonder if Tomasu actually finds even half the shit he draws attractive
like his yeti

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>>14765039
Cute is an understatement, they're better than most girls kc made last year.

>>14765112
I want to approach her from below while the Jaws music plays, and then I will bite her butt!

>>14764958
I like quite a few of them, the slug girl was top tier stuff.

>>14765070
She seems so happy like my waifu!

>>14765112
I feel bad for misinterpreting one of the lines in their profile, it gave everyone the wrong idea about kelps (floating about on the surface instead of being stuck to the floor and occasionally being carried around by currents)

>>14765070
>Merry Christmas

>>14765066
Literally nobody of import

>>14765126
Shh, I had to put something on that side of the screen, that was all I had.

>>14765112
I still say Satyros was his recent best. The closest thing you can get to a true lady in terms of manners in the MG ranks, loves drinking, is very playful and just looks fun all around.

>>14765133
Just a shame about the hairy legs and crotch. Satyros with normal legs would have been 10/10 easily.

>>14765135
They can recede that natural crotch cover.

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>>14765070

>>14765141
They still shouldn't have it in the first place. Give them normal legs and have them put on some pants or something.

>>14765135
But the goat legs thing made them work. They were monstrous yet incredibly civil and ladylike at the same time.

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>>14765146
No

>>14765153
But those legs look fucking hideous.

>>14765146
>I want to remove the monster parts of a monster girl
Why? If you want to go full "it's just a human in a costume" tier you have kikimoras for that.

>>14765160
For you maybe.

>>14765160
This is a monstergirl thread.
You don't see people going
>Oh, arachnes are hot but lets remove the spider bit because I don't like that.

>>14765135
>Monster girls would be perfect without the monster
The goat legs are pretty neat.

>>14765160
They don't look hideous when they're wrapped around your head.

>>14765164
>>14765167
there is absolutely nothing sexy about hairy goat legs

>>14765168
Stop it. Don't give me a boner this early.

>>14765166
I know for a fact we've had a discussion like that in past threads.

http://imgur.com/76nTQwX
>MFW this bullshit is starting all over again in thread

>>14765169
I think they look fairly sexy on her.

>>14765169
Then why have they been a stable of nymphs and satyrs, the most sexually active creatures imaginable, for millenia?

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>>14765166
I actually would enjoy spider girls more if they looked more like this, instead of a human torso pasted onto a spider.

>>14765127
If he wasn't worth it you should not have mention him.
So give me a name, I'm in the mood for low teir crap anyway

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>>14765169
Where do you think you are?

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>Going out to do yard work with a Flok backpack; Mowing the lawn, pulling weeds, etc.
>She keeps you hydrated and absorbs your sweat as you work.
>She loses some moisture and shrinks a little so she wants to have sex when you finish and head back inside.

>>14765169
They look great.

>>14765169
Nor is there about being part snake, or tentacles, or part spider, or centipede, or cow, or wolf.
Basically, you're being a retard. This is the monstergirl thread, the girls are part monster. Why are you here?

>>14765187
And i would enjoy spider girls more if I actually had ones pedilaps wrapped around my head pulling me into her, but we all don't get what we want.

>>14765121
Don't feel bad. At least we got that cute fanart.

>>14765187
Well hello there beautiful. Still inferior to Rachne though.

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>>14765197

I like this one

>>14764939
Were you not there for the last 1000 posts of last thread. At least two people love her enough to spend hours discussing her. one guy has her in his top ten, and then there's that writefag.

There's literally enough of us who like gnome to fill a small car.

>>14765187
>human girl in a spider costume
snore.

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>>14765187
Bipedal spidergirls are fine too.

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Fat-bottomed fox lolis.

>>14765196
So you're a shameless slut for spiderpussy?

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The man got you down? The law breathing down your neck? Better call Sally!

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>>14765169
I disagree.

>>14765207
I think we're being trolled. This guy hates the monster parts, and this is completely at odds with the thread in general.

>>14765213
Who isn't?

>>14765213
I'm only a shameless slut for MGs that I feel I could be compatible with.

>>14765169
They look sexy in my opinion. Same with tthe others MGs.

>>14765203
Yeah it's cute too.

>>14765195
Maybe he only loves Succubi.

>>14765219

Me. I'm not a big fan of spider MGs

>>14765225
I'm afraid if one took a fancy to you, I don't think you'd have a choice if you liked her or not.

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>>14765212
A'ight.

>>14765214
Fund it.

>>14765220
You're still a slut begging for a taste of vitamin P.

>>14765188
The same faggot who writes shit unfinished shit like http://pastebin.com/X8Kc83vd and clogs IRC or Discord.

>>14765228
Stop replying to yourself.

>>14765222
>Maybe he only loves Succubi.
Maybe. Its still weird how he hates truly monstrous limbs and yet apparently frequents the thread.I guess kikimoras are more his type.

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>>14765213
But MG Spiders are perfect.

>>14765232
What the fuck is vitamin P?

>>14765212
>>14765215
I want to bite their asses for some reasons.

>>14764752
>can't leave, wizards are like hermit crabs and if you leave the tower, someone else will move in and move your stuff around

Hilarious. I love this idea.

>>14765235
I don't samefag. Sorry to disappoint.

>>14765234
>posting roughly five minutes worth of work
I know we're hardly distinguished wordsmiths here, but what the actual fuck? This is lazy beyond belief.

>>14765243
Do you ever wonder why wizards wear nothing but bathrobes, pajamas and slippers?
That's why. Can't go out, so gotta get comfy.

>>14765239
So you want to be tied up in a web and have a scary spider force your future children into her womb?

>>14765240
The P, which all men love.

>>14765254
>The P, which all men love
Pancakes?

>>14765256
The pussy.

>>14765214
Perfect girl.

>>14765236
Yeah or it's just bait.

>>14765256
He's clearly talking about Pretzels.

>>14765234
>http://pastebin.com/X8Kc83vd
huh didn't think it be that bad
thanks for sharing

>>14765254
>The P, which all men love.
I know what you mean, I fucking love Pastrami sandwiches too.

>>14765256
Puss puss

>>14765261
>>14765265
>>14765269
>>14765270
Nah, it's pizza. Everybody loves pizza.

>>14765269
What about peanut butter sandwiches? Those are the best.

>>14765254
>So you want to be tied up in a web and have a scary spider force your future children into her womb?
I'd like some of that.

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>>14765254
>So you want to be tied up in a web and have a scary spider force your future children into her womb?
You're saying that like it was a bad thing. Especially that they aren't the only MGs to do these things.

>>14765272
Piestrongs family pizzeria is the best. Anyone who says otherwise has shit taste.

What would a Satyros jacking you off with her hairy legs feel like?

>>14765280
I thought you died a long long time ago.

>>14765278

>tfw I will never get to try my hand at fending off an ushi oni.

I will never get to find out if I have the strength to make such MGs sad.

>>14765285
Legends never die anon.

>>14765228

I'm sure she'd be understanding if I turned her down. There's someone else out there for her.

I like tall, tall, TALL monstergirls!

>>14765277
>>14765278
But she'll lick your tears off your face and happily pant how you're a pervert for knocking her up like this.

>>14765294
how "tall" we talking here?

>>14765292
She'd be understanding. She'd understand that shes gonna string your ass up and rape you until you loved her. Thats arachne love for you.

>>14765297
TALL!

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>>14765295
And I will beg her not to tickle the soles of my feet as punishment because that would be too much for me to handle.
>>14765294
Pick your poison.

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>>14765294
7 to 8 ft is a s big as I'll go, and I wouldn't have it any other way.

>>14765299

Figures. I didn't expect any less.

>>14765302
explain! example! info! GO!

>>14765308
Start at boobhat height and go up until the limit of us being able to do the hanky-panky.

>>14765243
So when one dies they have a chain of tower swapping

>>14765304
That'll make her want to tickle you all over.

I want a Tanuki intern

>>14765311
Complete with Metaphysical Geographic narration by David Attenborough.

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>>14765295
Stop acting like an Alp anon.
Arachnes are pure and just want love like all other MGs.

>>14765306
But you know what you could always do? Fight back. Assert dominance and show you are not to be trifled with.

>>14765313
All according to keikaku.

>>14765315
That sounds amazing, but what happens to a towerless wizard

>>14765328
He is left exposed and has to seek a symbiotic relationship with a party of adventurers.

>>14765316
But they'll ride you hard and deep, making you cum until you can't get it up. Then they'll taunt you for enjoying theme rape and cumming inside of a stranger!

>>14765314
Are you sure you wouldn't be the intern

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>>14765304
Why not choosing a little one?

>>14765317

Yeah, I'll go to a gym and git gud and maybe tie her up with some rope. Give her a taste of her own medicine

>>14765304
Troll is the best one there for me. Her breasts are head height and she has a nice healthy look to her.

>>14765344
How is that different from other MGs?

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I bet Valentine's day would be a one huge fuckfest in MGC

Reporter is clearly jewnuki

>>14765347
I'm going to give the little thing a big, pregnant belly.

>>14765347
I want to live with a shortstack and a tall girl with a flat chest! I want them both to argue about which kind of body I prefer!

I want them both to turn into blushing messes when I tell them that they're both perfect in their own way!

>>14765355
They're spiders! They're mean and and scary!

>>14765267
It gets much worse.

>>14765246
The writing or me posting that? The writer themselves aren't much better than what I posted at all and I'm surprised they haven't just committed a much needed bullet eating yet.

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>>14765357
>>14765360
Good tastes.

>>14765361
They're spiders! They're nice and cute!
You can't escape their hugs!

>>14765361
>mean

Most of them just hang out in their webs, don't bother anyone what don't bother them.

>scary

Scary is relative. Wasp-family creatures are, in my COMPLETELY OBJECTIVE estimation, scarier.

>>14765350
Thats the spirit.

>>14765215
I would go for a non-loli Bapho even if she still had a flat chest.

>>14765377
I want to see an ushi with purple fuzz.

>>14765386
And thus the tall flat/short flat battle began within the Sabbath.

>>14765373
>>14765378
No! They just love to rape boys and see them scared!

>>14765356
That reporter is cute but she seems lonely. I want her to be my valentine.
MGs would not use condoms though.

>>14765389
Everyone wants one.

>>14765386
what about a buff Bapho
a Buffomet?

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>>14765395
Get a cute and a fluffy rape machine spider.

>>14765400
Tall or tiny?
Either way I'm patting their head.

>>14765243
>wizard really has to travel somewhere
>moves the entire tower there and shouts "Alright, what do you need me for" off a balcony

>>14765389
>Ushi with purple fuzz
You mean an Ushi/Cheshire hybrid? You madman, do you want smug spiders that can teleport? You'll doom us all.

>>14765243
That is hilarious and I love it.

>>14765408
Considering how wizards moving there towers around has actually been a thing in a lot of fantasy fiction, I find this pretty easy to believe.

>>14765413
I just wanted a purple Ushi but I think I could get on board with your idea.

>>14765408
>>14765415
>>14765418
Am I to understand we are starting to get an interest in wizards again?

>>14765395
Nice mis-fire

>>14765406
They'd both be good
>A tall buff, sporty bapho and her shortstack little sister who lifts to compete against her sister as they try to seduce guys from the gym.

>>14765424
Did we ever stop?
I'd be one purely to mess with monster girls.

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>>14765424
Wizards are always in fashion. It just takes the universe aligning in a certain way every once in a while for our puny minds to understand that.

>>14765418
Howl's Mobile Tower, complete with a sexy fire demon in the boiler!

>>14765405
>>14765425
But they're gross!

>>14765427
I'd be taking them home and impregnating them that very night.

>>14765434
I'd prefer Laputa Tower, floating above the peasants and their dirt through the power of MAGNETS.

>>14765016
>I regret shitting on flow kelp now.
I doubt that, you just seem to hate everything.

>>14765437
You don't want a dozen doors leading to a dozen waifus in different towns?

>>14765444
>wizard
>waifus
How do you figure? I mean, if he fucks one of them, he loses his powers. You don't become a wizard by thinking with your dick.

>>14765448
A wizard summons/creates a familiar waifu. They never actually dick her, though. They just reward the magical loli with max level pleasure spells while they sit back and shitpost in their crystal ball.

>>14765448
>if he fucks one of them, he loses his powers
The fuck are you on about?

>>14765465
Then there's no need for doors opening to different towns, you keep your Familiar about so they can lift things for you, and cook and do the laundry.
Wait. Wizards need Kikis, don't they?

>>14765473
Wizardhood is achieved through virginity at age 30.

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I genuinely don't get what people mean by flow

>>14765465
I want a wizard to enchant a shitpost with bait beyond the material plane. A supernatural shitpost. Bait from Beyond.

>>14765474
Nah. Who needs kikis, when every single cleaning implement you own is enchanted with sentience?

>>14765477
Do you mean flow in a story?

>>14765448
Wizzard corruption story when?
I'm going to have to write it myself, aren't I...?

>>14765476
Where? In MGE, or in internet memes?

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Are you a bad enough dude to take back your heart from the evil red dragon on Valentine's Day?

In the literal sense. You'll probably* have to kill her to get it back.





*100%

>>14765489
I'm afraid so. And you can't corrupt a wizzard, last time a bunch of amazons offered carnal pleasures to Rincewind he asked them for potatoes.
>>14765493
Memes, duh. Who cares about MGE?

>>14765484
Yes indeed-y.

>>14765495
Will she hurt my feelings if I try?

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>>14765498

>>14765497
>Who cares about MGE?
Good point.

>>14765495
She can take my heart both literally and figuratively all she wants as long I as she lets me lick those abs

>>14765448
>>14765476
We're not talking about japanese meme wizards here.

>>14765495
The joke's on her: I never had a real heart!

I wish a spider could help me get over my arachnophobia even if I would run screaming from her the first time I saw her

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Yo! You might wanna keep your head down for the next five-to-ten minutes.

>>14765503
Thanks for your help, random citizen.

>>14765495
>Red Dragons
>Evil
>When Benedict Cumberbatch voices Smaug
Not seeing anything past that sexy, sexy voice.

>>14765517
Yes we are.

>>14765373
The writer. The guy wrote a few lines and saved it to pastebin, that's just shitty. I will never understand the few writefags who pull that shit.

>>14765436
one right after another? or at the same time? Either way, that's a lot of responsibility to take

What would it be like working in a MGC cuddle parlor

>>14765526
Consider the following: a group of operators invade a wizard's tower. Turns out the inside is bigger than the outside, things turn nasty.
>>14765540
That sounds silly, yet I...

>>14765443
>disliking the new MG means I hate everything
Nice assumptions, anon. I assume there's a reason why you think I hate everything? Perhaps you've mistaken me for some shitposter simply for having a different opinion to you?

>>14765524
Even if she teased you about it?

>>14765476
Not true, man. I'm yet to receive any magic

>>14765495
What is this heart stealing thing anyway? I'm not sure how it relates to dragons.

>>14765554
It's a single anon who keeps trying to pushing some stupid thing about dragons tearing your heart out of your chest. Ignore it.

>>14765540
Lots of pathetic girls that want to feel close to someone.

>>14765538
Same time and I'm more than ready to accept responsibility.
By getting them buffer than they've ever been before.

>>14765554
Go watch Dragonheart.

>>14765543
>Perhaps you've mistaken me for some shitposter simply for having a different opinion to you?

Probably, I've seen him accusing people of this shit before.

>>14765536
Tbqh famiglia I told you they were a shitty writer.

>>14765554
Dragon's Dogma.

>>14765566
You can draw some fine-ass midriff drawfriend.

>>14765545
Will she be gentle about it

>>14765564
It wasn't just the content, it was the way they wrote about five minutes worth of stuff, barely proofread it then threw it at us like it was all fine and dandy.
It's like the guy has no standards whatsoever.

>>14765573
No.

>>14765542
>That sounds silly, yet I
>That sounds silly, yeti
I'm on to your tricks serial hugger, I'm not working at your "cuddle parlor"

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>>14765566
I want to cheer up a depressed cupid who's helped so many people yet hasn't found a man for herself.

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HAPPY VALENTINES DAY, ANON!
YOU CAN'T DENY ME A HUG THIS TIME!

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>>14765498
Discussing the flow of a story, and actually analysing it to improve yourself can be a tricky thing. The reason is, "story flow" can mean quite a few things. But there are a few factors which can contribute towards a person saying that a story's flow is off.
Firstly, narration and dialogue. If it feels stilted, or forced, then that can negatively impact a story. Now, this might seem like a rather unintuitive concept, what I'm about to say, but when you're writing a story normally, you don't want the reader to notice the words. Obviously, you want them to read the words, but think about how you read a book. You don't get hung up on every word, is the point I'm making. Your eyes flow over the sentences and paragraphs, taking in a steady flow (hey, there's that word) of information.
If your writing is bad, or off, your readers aren't going to be able to do that. They'll be too busy "untangling" and trying to extract the intended meaning from your sentences to actually read smoothly. Same for when it doesn't quite seem natural, like if you don't vary your sentence structure enough, or if you're using too much punctuation, or if it seems like your grammar is just a little off. It doesn't even need to be wrong, necessarily, but it just needs to look unnaturally when read inside your mind to interrupt that flow.

Another factor is story pacing. Now, this won't be such an issue in shorter stories, like something under 10,000 words, because hey, it's short. This is really for stories where you'll be thinking a decent amount about character interaction and development, and where splitting it into parts or chapters might not be a bad idea.
Well, how do you improve pacing? If you ask me, I'd say direction and purpose. When you're writing a scene, it needs to have a goal of some point, even if that goal isn't contributing towards the main plot line and the eventual conclusion. Hell, it can be something as simple as getting a laugh out of the reader and leaving it at that, if it doesn't look out of place in your story. Obviously something like that won't mesh well in some grim, post-apocalyptic fight for bitter survival, but I'm getting off topic there.
The point is, and I think I've said this before rather recently, when writing a story, it really pays off to have at least a general idea of where you're going with it. To look at it in terms of a single scene, you should know why you're writing that scene, even if you don't quite know what could happen in it yet.

I should probably mention that that's just my personal take on things, and how I approach storytelling, but I hope it helps you more than not at all. I know it can be frustrating when someone tells you to improve something abstract like "story flow" without actually going into some technical detail about what they mean.

>>14765590
I've denied you hugs for years now. This year will be no different.

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I want to serve this dragon

>>14765356
But what if you simply can't give a fuck?

>>14765592
I'm going to molest that Schedule Dog.

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>>14765024

Agreed

>>14765578
Can I find a new spider to help me get over my fear

>>14765592
Oh wow, I just posted that, but I didn't think it'd be that awful to read.

I'm sorry, I probably should've split that up a bit more.

>>14765592
You're part of the reason I quit, you helpful villain.

>>14765356
>this year people are starting to give a fuck!
I love it.

>>14765563
>I've seen him
Not either of them but are you one of those guys who can recognize certain people's posting styles?

>>14765607
Oh come on, alpie boy.
We're only trying to help
>alp will never write a story about a scylla who wants to be a drummer in a famous band

I love you please come back.

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>>14765604

>>14765604
Nope. You gotta go deep to face your fears.

>>14765615
>alpie boy
But I'm not Alp.

>>14765560
Mino milk?

>>14765613
How common can it be to see someone pointing out a post and claiming it's this one guy who supposedly hates everything? It's like the post shows up word for word every thread or so the moment the guy sees an opinion he doesn't like.

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I want to trick two lonely yetis into hugging each other when blindfolded thinking that the other one is me. And then get a good head start before they get hold of me.

>>14765624
You can't hide from my sweaty love. A half assed paste spoiling your own stories will not sate me, get back to work.

>>14765625
You know it.

>>14765620
>>14765621
But spiders are scary with their fangs and if I can't control the exposure I might get even more scared

>>14765632
But I'm a completely different ex-writefag you RPing fuckwit.
You probably never even heard of me.

>>14765626
In the last thread, a bunch of people claiming NOT to be the guy weren't banned, while he was.

Seems to me as though posting style is a poor way of identifying someone.

>>14765620
>file name
Please don't remind me.

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>>14765637
Does she truly look scary?

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>>14765497
>Wizard summons a Succubus to bully and cunttease
>He wants to get some challenge, so he conjures the ultimate Succuslut
>The cosmos has a different interpretation than he had, so instead of a perfect porn star he gets a nerdy, chuuni, bespectacled nerdubutt
>The flat and plain girl doesn't really even try to rape him, and instead wants to learn about magic as well as fantastic creatures and locations
>Spending time portaling around the world with her turns out to be a lot of fun
>After a particularly grueling battle against a ravenous bugblatter beast they both collapse, sitting, leaning against the broken rock
>The fresh sweat and her hair smell so nice
>The tiny bust heaving with her ragged breath is actually quite attractive under that sweater
>The Wizard has to will himself to snap out of it, but it's too late to put the ember out

>In the next few weeks the Wizard finds himself staring at the Succubutt as she darts around the library with her arms full of books
>The three months that she's summoned for are about to run out
>He doesn't like that thought
>He wishes she would stay
>There's only one way, though, and that would mean losing the challenge
>He tries to banish the thought, but every time he sees her eyes flash behind her freckles and glasses, it knocks at the gates of his mind
>If he just put it in, she would stay
>He only has to put his dick inside her
>He cannot, he'd never betray his code

>Finally it's the last day of the challenge
>The Succubutt has packed all the mementos of their adventures to take with her when she's desummoned
>The luggage is already in the magic circle
>She stands on the edge of the ring and turns to face him with an almost melancholic face
>She hugs the Wizard
>When she breaks the embrace, he doesn't
>He whispers his secret desire into her ear
>She can't stay
>He's won, and she'll be sent to the next victim
>She's just glad her first summoning was something this nice
>She'll never forget him

>Energy crackles in the air
>Her hair stands on end
>Suddenly her body becomes weightless
>Her yelp of surprise is cut short as the Wizard kisses her
>A sharp pain stabs at her
>Closely followed by a blunt pain as she slams into the stone floor and the Wizard slams onto her
>Through the haze of pain she can see the final speck of sand fall through her hourglass
>Nothing happens

>>14765620
>literally eats people
>yuri
No thank you.

>>14765639
No, in the last thread the guy claiming he was several maledom posters being boogeymanned as one guy actually turned out to be the same person and was banned for the usual weekend shitflinging.
At any rate, the guy you're defending is also claiming from one single post that this anon is some angry anon who apparently hates everything. Although considering how it once again turned out our weekend warrior was pretending to be multiple people (as always) who the fuck knows anymore.

>>14765601
Please molest the schedule dog gently.

>>14765607
Part of the reason you quit? I don't get it. I don't think I've made any writefags quit.

>>14765637
If they expose you to the scariest parts, then you won't be as scared.

>>14765638
I name you...
Murloc!

>>14765657
I'm pretty sure I saw a few people being dragged into his shit. Luckily, it seems they made it out ok.
>who the fuck knows anymore
Boy, ain't that the truth?

>>14765658
Oh, I certainly didn't say it was because of you, but when you wrote a similarly long criticism of my work early on it did put into perspective just how awful it was. I kept writing for a considerable time after that, but the wound never fully healed.
Don't stop doing what you're doing, though. My main reason for quitting was sloth. Being too lazy to keep writing and planning shit out and checking what I'd written for inconsistencies and errors and on top of that trying to improve was just too much of a pain.
>>14765667
Yes, anon. I am Murloc, I am death.

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>>14765654
Good end.

>>14765653
Could she smile a little instead of looking at me like prey
>>14765664
Or I'll cry and curl into a ball

>>14765654
Nerdy Succubi a best

>>14765671
A couple of anons were dragged into it, but I was there and a lot of the posts claiming to be different people yet still desperately trying to continue the shitfest vanished, along with the guy's normal posts throughout the thread on his banning.
At this point it should be well known that he pulls the silent majority card and samefags to look like he has support.

>>14765678
>Or I'll cry and curl into a ball
Too bad that she finds that so cute.

>>14765574
>Expecting shit writers to have standards
>In the current year

>>14765673
I got it right? I find that hard to believe, I just pulled a random name out of the dead writefags.
I was also going to go for Punaldin or Niebelfader out of random choice.

>>14765681
True, but seeing as a few people did get accused of being him, I think my point about posting styles still stands.

>>14765688
>I got it right?
No. No you didn't. I was making a joke. A joke you didn't get. Kids these days...
>Punaldin
>Niebelfader
I never reached their popularity.

>>14765673
>actually getting in depth criticism.
Don't knock it, man. Some of us wish we had that.

>>14765684
Cute enough to stop bullying?

>>14765691
>Don't knock it, man
Didn't I just say it was a good thing? I'm pretty sure I did.

>>14765690
>either of those two being popular
Maybe I wasn't here for it.

>>14765692
Too cute not to lovingly bully.

>>14765696
Maybe you should try to deduce from that statement something about me. If those two were never popular and I never reached their popularity, that means?
Yeah. I'm done with this now.

>>14765692
Nope, cute enough to wrap up, it'll be easier too since you're all curled up

>>14765689
Fair enough. It didn't help that they wanted to discuss maledom at the exact point our shitposting friend was trying to monopolize the subject as his own personal focus. Sometimes I wonder if he does it as a false flag against the subject, he certainly seems angry about it.

Any news on YBA and Vengeance in Little Monster City? I've been gone for a long time thanks to school and an internship

>>14765701
>>14765698
Ad then anon was married to his greatest fear

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>>14765692
Cute girls are the best to bully

>>14765699
Let's not do a Nyanon style guessing game (unless you are him I guess). Who are you, brother?

>>14765677
That succubutt is getting 100% pregnant.
>>14765710
So is this devil.

>>14765706
YBA appeared in the previous thread, and a couple threads before that one. He went ahead and clarified some things about his setting and even expanded on the Battle Cheshires.

>>14765711
>I'm done with this now

>>14765706
We were actually discussing it at the end of the last thread. YBA showed up and talked more about the setting, and revealed he's still writing.

>>14765706
You can stop with the shilling now, it's getting pathetically obvious. 3rd day in a row someone has asked about YBA and that story out of nowhere and he conveniently popped out of the woodwork yesterday too.

I'm sure those two things aren't related though.

>>14765705
That would make sense.
But enough of that. I'm gonna be productive and color something. Not sure what yet tho.

>>14765717
>acting all mysterious
>not mentioning who you are
Oh really now. This is a greater faggotry than just saying your name.

>>14765678
I actually can't find any images of her smiling nicely when she's partially in her spider form.

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>>14765499
She'll attempt to kill you.

>>14765509
You'll have to make a deal in order to do that. A hefty deal.

Like sacrifice your waifu heavy deal.

>>14765554
See >>14765568

>>14765561
Fuck right in the feels.