/brit/

>>77337791
phwoar

cooking lunch

>>77337791
awful presentation but i'd eat it


is that mustard on the carrots though? baffling

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just took this

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mehhhhhheaeaeeuehhh need a job

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A heart that's full up like a landfill
A job that slowly kills you
Bruises that won't heal
You look so tired, unhappy
Bring down the government
They don't, they don't speak for us
I'll take a quiet life
A handshake of carbon monoxide
With no alarms and no surprises
No alarms and no surprises
No alarms and no surprises

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fuck...

>>77337821

Wholegrain mustard is delicious lad

>>77337824
Believe me you don't

>>77337775
Where you do live mate I'm gonna fucking drive over and bite your nose off, I'm gonna be sitting in the gutter shitting bits of you out my arse by the end of the night

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>>77337835

>>77337845
on CARROTS? I think not

Parents keep telling me to get a job even though I have enough money and don't need one

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lucky JEW bastard

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This was very emotional

Almost predicated doubles, trips and quads in one thread, were it not for some FUCKHEAD who I'm about to disintegrate

>>77337875
How are you going to learn the value of money if you never had to earn it?

SHE PLAYED THE FIDDLE IN AN IRISH BAND BUT SHE FELL IN LOVE WITH AN ENGLISHMAN

outta my way janny fucking shits

Parents keep telling me to get a job even though I don't have enough money and need one

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I can't think of a more deano family than gary lineker's
it's like they could have all been 9/10's but got given one ugly gene

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>>77337835
Based

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>>77337835
>A job that slowly kills you

don't think my parents are going to be ok with me being NEET much longer

>>77337897
how are you going to know the value of freedom if speech if you can't call the king a bender?

>>77337889
plus had the best lesbian sex scene ever

but yes very good thoroughly enjoyed it

>>77337912
how many years a neet?

>>77337897
I'll check out the exchange rates

>>77337897
There's no value to money nowadays, it's all numbers in some computer.

>>77337912
alri goldberg

>>77337837
Nokia...
I don't get it

>>77337926
8

>>77337912
youve got a job, posting fuck machines

now do your job

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Based Yoko

>>77337931
alri smarty pants, less of the back chat.
>>77337932
regardless, you have to work to earn it. Doesn't grow on trees you know?

>>77337950
heh
rookie

eating rice and poulet basquaise

>>77337942
ah ha ha based nigger

>>77337950
what lead to your neetdom lad

>>77337952
shan't

>>77337942
BASED BLACK MAN

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>>77337835
Hero

>>77337968
hate people, hate going outside, lazy, too depressed to try and compete for being a slave

wish yorke would remember songs are meant to have tunes in them

>>77338022
t. Oasisfag

radiohead are shit

playing fallout 4 lads

hate, Hate, HATE the glowing sea and bethesda's shit tier fucking radscorpian pathing FUCK REEEEEEEEEEe

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>nigger

>kissed a girl at the club
>could taste vomit in her mouth

Is it bad I was still happy with myself?

radiohead is proto numale music. the original faux pop rock.

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>>77338022
>>77338033
>>77338047

>>77338031
damon

>>77338031
no

Boss had a dm with me lads. He said he hasn't heard a single negative thing about me likes my ethic and wants me to step up and take greater responsibility. Don't know how I feel. I don't want stay any longer than 2 years here

*poos on the poster below me*

>>77338069
Inappropriate

banter
http://www.independent.co.uk/news/uk/home-news/live-bbc-interview-interrupted-mime-artist-fuck-off-street-leicester-a7846901.html?cmpid=facebook-post

>>77338069
yum

>>77338043
Congratulations. You're one step closer to hitting rock bottom.
*pours vinegar in your mouth to neutralise vomit bacteria*

>>77338068

post them

>>77338068
It's always a good thing to have on the old 'V lad

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>tfw you wake up

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>>77338085
>>77338086
>>77338087
>3 posts in the same second
/brit/ is too powerful

>>77338090
It was at a cafe over coffee

>>77338108
BARKED

>>77338086
haha lel

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>ywn be a part of a world famous rock band in the 1960s-80s doing gear all day, shagging groupies and smashing up hotel rooms all the while being paid billions for it

>>77338104
>tfw you wake up
>tfw another day lonely without a girlfriend

>>77338104
https://youtu.be/Cwkej79U3ek

>>77338068
essentially he figured out you're too beta to challenge him or stand up for yourself so he wants you in the tough position because you're the only one who'll do the shit work and swallow it

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I just bought a male masturbater online. Anyone who has experience with silicone "flesh lights" or "pocket pussy" style products, do I need to use lube?

Also, any general tips and advice for using my male masturbatory aide?

>>77338104
lol this happens with alarming regularity

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>>77338144

>>77338158
bin yourself my man

EVERYONE NEEDS A BOSSOM FOR A PILLOW, EVERYONE NEEDS A BOSSOM.

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At the pink floyd exhibition lads

>>77338158

Get a gf

>>77338158
>male masturbator
Sounds pretty gay

>>77338108
honestly hate dogs

wouldn't fuck a girl who has one

>>77338158
>do I need to use lube?
does that look wet to you? fucking virgin obviously you use lube or you'll rip your foreskin off

http://www.breitbart.com/london/2017/07/18/migrants-riot-sexually-harass-women-german-folk-festival/

>cuckmany

>>77338158

Yes lube and make sure to powder it after use

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Legend

>>77338184
squealing

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>had the gf dream last night

going to take some amphetamines and write a 6 part sci-fi series

>>77338172
Fucking track m8. Haven't head that one in a while

shan't perchase be perusing the breitshart link provided thereabove

>>77337837
except adam and eve didnt really exist, ever

VERY hungry, more camembert in the fridge to eat.

>>77338196
haha is this actually a big deal over there?

imma pwn that n00b with the uber 1337 hax and the pr0n

g2g c u l8r LFG BRD UBRS DM ZG MC n00b? 1337?

Imagine if a chunk of cornwall or something was just randomly owned by Germany or some other random country for no apparent reason

>>77338190
Breitbart is fake news

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>>77338149
a-at least one of the whisperfus is back
https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=70KmTfxGzgI

>>77338152
a poignant and ever-relatable piece

>>77338160
too often for my liking

>>77338158
Want one & have the cash for one. But it's asking the parents to use their credit card. Hahaha

>>77338229
Lol yeah but it shouldn't be

>>77338233
honestly on a day to day life would it matter

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Very interesting

*turns around and talks to somebody else*

>>77338176
quite a good end to an alright album tbf
dont even care that contrarians hate it

>>77338229
massive deal we've had riots every day

Can't say I'm surprised the Jew hates the animal that stands as a symbol of fidelity and trust.

i hate dogs

>>77338196
What's he on about

Can't say I'm surprised the French loves the animal that stands as a symbol of filth and stench.

>>77338257
no, but it'd make you stop and go "hmm"

>>77338210
It just came on an old school radio station. Here you go.

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=5LBnMRWeV-E

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Ur buitiful ;)

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No caffeine in the house

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>>77338298
anthem

>>77338287
>

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The fat gf.

>>77338287
Nothing wrong with pigs, good meat.

>>77338298
takes me back to a time I don't really remember

>>77338310
ask her how does she know you only live once

Got no friends or family to see Dunkino with

>>77338325
cor blimey

>>77338348
I'll be your friend

>>77338341
That's just a generic tinder caption, nothing to do with her.

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want to go back to the 90s lads
everything was so comfy

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=xeJ-AinpiBg

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=hOrwbEBdJaw

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=rADYj-ZqSXc

ブリカス

>>77338341
That's tinder saying that when you haven't sent a message yet you fat virgin

nonce

>>77338365
you still in a bloody hostel lad?

britain is not european

>>77338325
she looks like that cash me outside bird (who's 14 by the way you fucking nonce)

>>77338325
hnnn

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>>77338232
When I was like 10 and I discovered ICQ was a thing I was genuinely shocked at the name and the general possibility of spelling things in a different way from the official one that English has
The first experience of this in a mind formed in a language with nearly 1-1 spelling to pronounciation correspondance is a thing to remember

>>77338360
well you can't

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>>77338365
yeah mate sorry I don't need dating apps to get laid, I go outside

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https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=_ElORM9O-0U

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>>77338190
>Breitbart

shoop da woop imma firin mah laz0r

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>yeah mate sorry I don't need dating apps to get laid, I go outside

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>>77338348

>>77338360
nah everything is much better now than it was then

>>77338325
I have that same exact lamp.

>>77338416
XP

>>77338420
fucking hell

>>77338423
less whites

>>77338143

http://vocaroo.com/i/s1I4PEOFpeCJ

>>77338416
I used to find this funny
now my sense of humour is far more refined and mature

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=Anun7ks8Y-0

>>77338461
like I said

>>77338420
some good advice in here, ngl

raaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaah
https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=eESNO-UvXWc

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The petite gf.

>>77338377
airbnb la

>>77338394
Say that to my face you rodent I'll break every bone in your body

>>77338461
Fewer

>>77338492
JANNINGTON

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>>77338463

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it's true lads

>>77338496
hmm

Dave always has the maddest visuals, Making me feel like im travelling the world and dat

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>>77338490
>and what will you call yourself?
>Dave


superior tequila
https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=8hLQCA2h8kA

>>77338492
would be perfect with a penis

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>>77338492
lord almighty

Name 5

>>77338524
yeah you know senpai
mad that he's only 19

Can't actually name a single fresh gimmick in /brit/ since the summer where @posting, runtposting, pawnposting, etc, all came out and I think that was about two years ago now - everything blurs together though

Any lads going to uni this September?

>>77338557
I miss ballbusting

>>77338420
Dress casual, know the layout and "buy ticket early, leave, then return just as the movie starts" are all honestly good pieces of advice
t. often seen at cinema alone

>>77338557
bollockposting

GIGA

>>77338557
Love X hate y

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Right in the feels lads.

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=N6O2ncUKvlg

>>77338538
Sean Conlon
Ritchie Neville
Scott Robinson
Abz Love
Jason "J" Brown

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>>77338557
trainposting

>>77338420
it is really not this complicated
just go in the daytime and no-one cares

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>>77338492
fuck is that

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https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=XbZ0OXmXw38

when i go at the cinema alone theres no prob most of the people there are alone 2

>>77338613
I'm not a doctor but I think it's a collar bone

Love chewing bottle caps, makes my teeth feel sharp and clean. Is this how a dog feels with some chewy thing

>>77338622
Can't even remember the last time I went to the Cinema 2bh.

>>77338622
My cinema at home has a no single male policy

>>77338622
yeah
desu I think most of it is just a meme like penis inspection day

Fed some more bottle caps to the runts again, little blighters just do not know the difference

>fucking girl
>start licking on her feet
>"ewww wtf anon"

You weren't moaning when I was chomping on your axe wound were you bitch? Fuck is wrong with feet

>>77338666
christ

>>77338622
Have never noticed anyone at the cinema alone. I don't think most people give a shit, they're too wrapped up in their evening to care about yours.

>>77338666
same

>>77338666
youre trolling

>Chris Evans got 2.2 million for Top Gear

blunder of the century

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>>77338420
ah yes
the human condition

>>77338678
>shagging vanilla birds

>>77338666
>it's a /tv/ post

>>77338696
should've given it to me

hate henry rollins

love doing farts

>>77338678
feet are gross

just rolled up a fat one

>>77338678
>fucking vanilla

my biggest fear is meeting a girl i like then having sex with her and realising she's bland as fuck

want to freeze my poo to turn it into a shank

Sold three copies of my book this month

>>77338720
what a dumb thing to hate

>>77338755
yes he truly is a dumb thing

fucking a girl and finding some pulsating neovagina

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might spend my first paycheck on some gucci loafers

>>77338779
excellent choice

might take a massive shit

I would gladly pay up to 200 quid for the licence fee if there were more top paid women and PoC

I will never pay the licence fee because i'm not a nonce enabler

anyone gonna go see Dunkirk?

just incriminated a jewish military officer with political treason hehe

someone post cute girls

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>>77338779

>>77338779
thinking about your tiny manlet feet entering those shoes

>>77338825
i'm not getting the ferry over just to see a crappy little town

>>77338779
could imagine the mexican wearing them

>>77338825
No
Jeremy Jahns says it's boring and has no character development

im 5'7

>>77338825
more like Duncuck

>>77338863
tits or gtfo

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>>77338831

>>77338836
weirdo

Woke up with the most bloated face today. Not sure why

>>77338882
lil wog

How much money do you keep in your transaction account?

2 grand here

>>77338893
early stages of bloaty head syndrome

>>77338861
"i guess this is it...i have become dunkirk"

whoa...

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>>77338831

>dunkirk
isn't that in scotland

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>>77338831

>>77338878
Disgusting ugly gremlin
Turns my stomach whenever she's posted

>>77338903
lol

>>77338900

2.1 grand here

BRITS

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=62s3FinAoC0&t=1616

Why would the government shit in your bed?

>>77338909
think it's a song by Camel

>>77338900
>>77338925
about 2.2 haha

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>>77338878

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Just made this

>>77338900
>transaction account
current account
£3.1k right now, my dude

thainonce the kinda nigga to go to the cinema alone

>>77338779
sort of things I can imagine Alan wearing

>>77338900
-$0.01

so lonely

>>77337902
>Those ears
Lmao well they're his kids alright.

>>77338927
>why would I shit in my own bed

lmaoooo

>>77338900
got 6 grand in mine currently

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>>77338915

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>>77338927
christ
seems like an Onion video
https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=JHvrirXi5Ds

>>77338960
MR LONELY, I HAVE NO BODY FOR MY OWN.

billionaires in this thread

love it when im in overdraft and put money into the bank but because it takes a few days to transfer in the overdraft keeps ticking and costs me even more money

>>77338900
7 grand in mine

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>>77338978

>>77338982
source?

It was me, Dunkirk all along!

>18 years old
>over 20k in the bank

very nice

>22
>have £300 in the bank

oops

>>77339004
cool im also 18 but have 21k in the bank

hate chinks, gooks, other misc. slanteyes

going to go out and have some lunch
then I'm going to Fopp to get some DVDs

arrogant wagies

>tfw 19 and have a 2 million USD trust fund guaranteed as llong as i lose my virginity by 21

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>got a new doorbell because the old one broke
>came with this meme sensor thing that picks up visitors and shows you on your phone with an app
>this shit keeps happening

I'm honestly fucking terrified, not even memeing. I can't handle this

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>>77339022

>>77337902
>manlets
>big ears
>brown eyes
>weak chins
>weird mouths

Christ almighty

>>77339040
enjoy crippling poverty virgin runt

got 32k in the bank but struggle to pay rent and bills

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>>77339004
>22
>65k in the bank
>40k held in an index fund
>3 properties I'll inherit

>>77339048
middle right looks like a Brazilian man

fuck of children brit is a 20+ general

Logging into my vanguards to check out the ol' portfolio

>>77338982
gonna need sauce on this milf

>>77339045
probably a fox or something if it's a motion sensor

sharting and pooing at all these poor people in my /brit/

>tfw 473k at 18

>>77339045
kek
is it just detecting if anyone goes vaguely near your doorbell

>24
>2 trusts
>stake in large amount of family property

hmmmmmm

>>77339074
It only happens at night and the sensor is extremely limited, right at the front door

>>77339079
No I tried it myself. When there are actually people around during the day there are no hits

well I make 180 million pounds per second and my dad could beat up your dad

have never been "overdrawn" and find the idea of being indebted to anyone absolutely abhorrent

been raking it in since the powers that be gave me 50p extra an hour, whacked it all into a Help2Buy ISA

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>>77338997
>>77339072
went to her page and it's blocked to non-members
http://www.modelmayhem.com/KellyNunnMartin
how bout dat?

Business idea: abolish inheritance

>>77339082
*beats your ass*
quiet posho

think I may have very slightly overdosed on the ol 'ffeine

Lads, who here living with parents forever ?

i've evolved beyond the need for money. whatever i need, the universe provides.

>>77339082
>>77339076
>>77339040
>>77339021
>>77339004
>>77338989
>>77338972
fuck off billionaires

>>77339098
>my dad could beat up your dad
bollocks

>>77339082
I'm the same
sounds a lot more impressive than it actually is

dont know how much is in my account, stopped keeping track after it went into 7 figures not really important after that point

>>77339097
Reckon you're about to be murdered lad

>>77339108

>not a lifetime ISA

You're doing it wrong

>>77339113
>>77338982
btw she's about 50 in these pics

>>77339119
I'll probably 'cide before I ever move out.

https://twitter.com/imaginarygf/status/887615592970235904


/leftypol/

>>77339099
because you're 17 and you've probably never even had an account with an overdraft. Just wait until you want to get into buying a house if you find the idea of debt abhorrent you cretin.

>>77339113
>no nudes

what a timewaster

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:^)

>>77339154
25 and have a mortgage already but alright sweaty x

>>77339135
yeah it's not something i really talk about in public or anything, i don't even know how much is in the trusts or when i'm receiving them. i've got some idea of the stake in the property but it's dependant on selling prices etc but it could be up to 500k lmao

39154
>buying a house
Despicable normoid runt constantly living on the precipice of bankruptcy.

>>77339170
nice chin
*wallops him*

>>77339189
>>77339189
>>77339189

new

>>77339153
>Hillary supporter
>leftypol

>>77339174
so you've got fuckloads of debt then, fuck off

>>77339170
that would be going straight up my schnoz

>>77339174
so you're indebted to someone you dense cunt

>>77339170
isnt it all from land rent

>>77339208
>>77339216
literal children

Has anyone in the uk been done for their shitposts a la jersey terrorist guy

Why does the government turn a relatively blind eye to here?