/brit/

File: benis.jpg (75KB, 1280x720px) Image search: [Google]

75KB, 1280x720px

/balt/

>>72029681
I don't understand this meme

Bbbbbbrrrrrrrraaaaaaaapppppp

File: images.jpg (11KB, 240x210px) Image search: [Google]

11KB, 240x210px

doing a poo

File: 1487053405544.jpg (106KB, 900x900px) Image search: [Google]

106KB, 900x900px

>>72029673

>In the case of a tool called “Weeping Angel” for attacking Samsung SmartTVs, WikiLeaks wrote, “After infestation, Weeping Angel places the target TV in a ‘Fake-Off’ mode, so that the owner falsely believes the TV is off when it is on, In ‘Fake-Off’ mode the TV operates as a bug, recording conversations in the room and sending them over the Internet to a covert CIA server.”

i have one of these televisions

File: bıg.jpg (181KB, 852x480px) Image search: [Google]

181KB, 852x480px

>>72029681

File: 1488872895079.jpg (702KB, 2560x1707px) Image search: [Google]

702KB, 2560x1707px

Communism

File: temple-os-13219.png (29KB, 640x480px) Image search: [Google]

29KB, 640x480px

>>72029708
now more than ever it is time to embrace TempleOS and return to God's plan

File: 1487629870414.jpg (21KB, 600x600px) Image search: [Google]

21KB, 600x600px

>>72029673
Top kek

who /progovernmentsurveillance/ here?

Looking at the ol' population projections

http://www.worldometers.info/population/africa/

File: 1487307617841.png (5KB, 224x225px) Image search: [Google]

5KB, 224x225px

>>72029673
>>72029738


Lololololololo

File: 1472720683375.jpg (68KB, 839x627px) Image search: [Google]

68KB, 839x627px

is canada a real country

File: 1487223977334.png (57KB, 625x656px) Image search: [Google]

57KB, 625x656px

/sux2suc/

>>72029726
whats terry's fucking problem?

>>72029673
>russians
>white

she looks like shit in her photos taken by other photographers.

File: 1488603836878.png (24KB, 625x626px) Image search: [Google]

24KB, 625x626px

>>72029673
orinignally

File: 1487907310310.jpg (447KB, 2048x1365px) Image search: [Google]

447KB, 2048x1365px

Portugese are WHITE!

>>72029746
unironically serious though
I don't care if the government can theoretically see my doing a poo posts on /brit/ if it can easily monitor the wealth of information muzzies terrorits always generate

File: Messaging-Question-icon.png (8KB, 512x512px) Image search: [Google]

8KB, 512x512px

>>72029707
>>72029727
>>72029746
>>72029761
>o.p. posted bait
please enlighten me.

>>72029726
running whonix now and any intrusion would be detected

>>72029784
All replies have come from that American poster who has that cuck girl as his waifu

what do you think of frances two round system?

>>72029782
what happens if the government becomes oppressive though?

this is the problem with big government in general

government is too big if you have to worry about certain people gaining prominence or control within/over it

>>72029808
Literally designed to stop populism similar to FPTP except Cameron caved into memekip with their one seat.

File: paleguy-crying.jpg (63KB, 633x758px) Image search: [Google]

63KB, 633x758px

>i will never possess a time machine
>i will never use it to go back in time to see that pinnacle of posts made by that one sad croatian poster made about how he doesn't want the balkans to go to war again because he already lost enough countrymen

File: 1487208588197.jpg (25KB, 540x540px) Image search: [Google]

25KB, 540x540px

>>72029784
>>72029804
/cuck/

>>72029763
to much of a genius for this world

>>72029815
>not wanting to live in a comfy fascist dictatorship with a leader telling you what to think.

I hope the cia agent watching me is a qt grill
All those times i fell asleep watching the ipad and she could be doing the very same thing to me lads

File: karl-laughing-1.png (204KB, 556x430px) Image search: [Google]

204KB, 556x430px

>>72029782
>he unironically still thinks the government wants more surveillance just to catch terrorists

File: image.png (1MB, 852x480px) Image search: [Google]

1MB, 852x480px

elsa is my waifu

i'm not the spammer

any of you lads wanna give me some feedback on some song lyrics I wrote?

>>72029673
I like her

Can't she be my pet?

ah yes the fake jap with his "broken" english.

the same jap that has yet to post a vocaroo or even a picture outside his windown

>>72029815
we aren't living in some dystopian sci-fi fanfic universe m8y, there's no chance of some faction gaining control over the government

and assuming you're the autismo yank that's exactly what you want with trump gaining power, to have middle-class and working americans gain power at the expense of the rest

File: 1488771846962.jpg (11KB, 240x238px) Image search: [Google]

11KB, 240x238px

>another 2.5 million african migrants expected to float across the med this summer

>>72029834
it's a hairy obese man in his 30s

t. watching you

>>72029855
Only if you promise to breed with her to make more people for your failing country

>>72029855
i'd rather be her pet tho

>>72029872
Your government should call the US Navy to help. Our admirals are just dying to shoot something, maybe if you put some africans in their way they'll stop begging the president to let them shoot at the Chinese.

was supposed to start working on this shitty project but around 3am I started playing town of salem for the first time and I can't stop playing it

deadline in a few hours

Ms Le Pen’s support, like support for Mr Trump and Brexit, is well correlated with education. Only 8% of French citizens with a degree voted FN in 2014; 41% of those without a high-school diploma did. As with Mr Trump, men are better disposed to the FN than women. Ms Le Pen, like Mr Trump, is particularly popular in old industrial towns from which jobs and confidence have drained away, taking with them faith in parties of the left

>>72029886
oh.... Well that works too enjoy my friend!

Has Trump changed his policy on ISIS? I remember hearing ISIS has almost lost, I bet trump takes all the credit

>>72029866
>there's no chance of some faction gaining control over the government

well it happened before when the neocons gained control and look at the mess they left us with

File: 1485919848165.png (219KB, 464x435px) Image search: [Google]

219KB, 464x435px

>>72029904
I think he's pro ISIS now after they denounced the Obama administration's wire tapping of trump tower

File: 1446168541032.png (150KB, 2120x2440px) Image search: [Google]

150KB, 2120x2440px

if more surveillance is what the government needs to catch those gosh darn terrorists then they should do whatever necessary in the name of Jesus

Really fuckin love garlic lads

>>72029902
o look the people who have been most negatively affected by neoliberalism are fighting back against it

what a surprise!

File: Cuckold.jpg (12KB, 232x180px) Image search: [Google]

12KB, 232x180px

>>72029804
>"that cuck girl"

Elsa Jean?

File: 1488415769653.png (386KB, 900x887px) Image search: [Google]

386KB, 900x887px

>>72029866
>we aren't living in some dystopian sci-fi fanfic universe m8y, there's no chance of some faction gaining control over the government

>>72029928

is that right, romeo?

>>72029912
ah yes I forgot how the neocons abused the surveillance system, installed an ideocracy, targeted certain groups and make undesirables disappear
those agencies are still dependant on societies, leaks do happen (a la a day ago) and if there was even a whiff of some government conspiracy people would find out

>>72029960
faggot

just made 5 hotpockets that i'm going to wash down with 3 cherry faygos

>>72029960
they executed lots of american citizens by drone missiles without first putting them through a trial due to surveillance gathered by the nsa

our very foundational document was trampled on by the neocons in the name of ideology

Cogere una rubia en nombre de /brit/

Hyped for the Battlefield 1 DLC desu

File: Do not want × 2.png (38KB, 1000x668px) Image search: [Google]

38KB, 1000x668px

In the news:
>“Weeping Angel”: a name taken from Doctor Who
>representative diversity is part of H.M. Government's agenda for sportive bodies, it is due to take effect in April, 2017

>>72029902
>Ms
It's "Miss" because she is not in a marriage.

>>72030001
do you mean they killed american born extremists or american aid workers in the middle east? if the former who gives a fuck, and if the latter then they figured the overall advantages of drone strikes outweighed the mistakes - you could say that's a shit policy but it's still a concept not limited to neocons, casualties always happen in wars and people understand that

>>72029993
>try the 4 cheese hotpockets
peng
>try the 5 cheese hotpockets
vile

It's the crust, it's disgusting.

might start saying soda irl
sounds much better than 'pop'

>>72030110
FOY
It's fizzy drink

File: janny.png (13KB, 341x39px) Image search: [Google]

13KB, 341x39px

>>72029993
treading on thin ice boyo

>>72030110
I always just call it whatever the particular brand is.

coke, pepsi, sprite.. I could go on.

File: 29804b29c4d901cd1d2614ce409e0fa2.jpg (180KB, 620x1021px) Image search: [Google]

180KB, 620x1021px

>this is a 10/10 in brit bong land

>>72030000

>>72030068
>if the former who gives a fuck

the constitution and the rule of law

respect for law and citizens' rights is the very bedrock of a free society and by not applying it to all then you are beginning to erode away at that bedrock

File: bluepill.jpg (27KB, 356x476px) Image search: [Google]

27KB, 356x476px

>>72030141
>I always just call it whatever the particular brand is.

File: cheeeeeeeEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEeeeeeAaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaa.png (126KB, 540x301px) Image search: [Google]

126KB, 540x301px

Vaya hombre dele un ToKecitoooooo yerba wenisiiiiimaaaaa KE WENAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAA AJAJAJJJAJAJJJAJ

http://www.strawpoll.me/12486424

JFers need not answer

>>72029928
Me too. I get jars of garlic paste. Check out this mad recipe I came up with:

bacon 150g (about 5 standard rashers)
1 cooking onion
2 tbs garlic paste
1 tbs rosemary
oil
4 slices bread

Chop the onion. Cut the bacon into pieces (kitchen scissors are perfect for this). Heat the oil. Fry the bacon in the oil. After about 5 minutes, mix in the onion. After a few more minutes, mix in the garlic and rosemary. Fry it all together until cooked then make it into sandwiches, adding whatever other filling you want (eg. lettuce, sliced olive, tomato). I like to spread tomato relish on one slice of bread and pickle relish on the other for extra flavour.

This smells amazing when cooking, but can be a very greasy sandwich if you're not careful with the oil.

>>72030175
do you honestly care about those people though?
once they fight for ISIS they literally defect to another country (as they see it), the american army would like to capture them if possible but they recognise the realities of war and that it's much easier to just off the lot of them

>>72030184
Are you in the "Australians aren't JFs" or "Australians are JFs" camp

File: Mexi–fat lad of brit.jpg (153KB, 840x964px) Image search: [Google]

153KB, 840x964px

Where's the Méxihombre?
Was he here 2 days ago, or was that somebody else?

File: rachel riley pupaid.jpg (221KB, 1200x1804px) Image search: [Google]

221KB, 1200x1804px

>>72030158
i wish to impregnate this woman

howling. some chad got upset with an asian girl on tinder and called her a chink

she uploaded his info online and now the dude has people hating him all over. got fired from his job and a permanent ban from tinder

https://www.buzzfeed.com/krishrach/a-man-has-been-permanently-banned-from-tinder-after-a-woman?utm_term=.kj0Rb0abz#.kvKzE3oED

>>72030184
Are you a 50 year old woman?

>>72030209

If you don't immediately know every single show in the poll, apart from the Scottish one, the Welsh one and Doctors because it's on in the daytime, then you are a JF

>>72030208
it is about the rule of law and keeping the government accountable

EL PIO CHE PAPU AJAJAJAJAJAJAJAAJAJAJAJAJAJAJAJAJAJAJAJAJA H AJA JK AJAKAJAKAKAJAKAJAKAJAKAJJJJJAJAJAJAJAKAKAKJAAKAKAAKKKJJJJJJAJAJAJAJJAJAJAJAJAJAJAJAJAJAJAJAJAJJKAJKKJAJAJJAJJJJJAJAJAJAJJ

I don't watch soaps anyway.
>>72030209
are any of those broadcast in Australia?

>>72030253
See them on UKTV, did a wank to a paused frame from Hollyoaks once when the internet was cut

>>72030253

I assume Enders and Corrie are on somewhere.

File: 1433983820005.png (551KB, 583x639px) Image search: [Google]

551KB, 583x639px

>>72030241
>buzzfeed
>"""chad"""
>epic anti-racism!
>American flag

EL PIO CHE PAPU AJAJAJAJAJAJAJAAJAJAJAJAJAJAJAJAJAJAJAJAJA H AJA JK AJAKAJAKAKAJAKAJAKAJAKAJJJJJAJAJAJAJAKAKAKJAAKAKAAKKKJJJJJJAJAJAJAJJAJAJAJAJAJAJAJAJAJAJAJAJAJJKAJKKJAJAJJAJJJJJAJAJAJAJJ
EL PIO CHE PAPU AJAJAJAJAJAJAJAAJAJAJAJAJAJAJAJAJAJAJAJAJA H AJA JK AJAKAJAKAKAJAKAJAKAJAKAJJJJJAJAJAJAJAKAKAKJAAKAKAAKKKJJJJJJAJAJAJAJJAJAJAJAJAJAJAJAJAJAJAJAJAJJKAJKKJAJAJJAJJJJJAJAJAJAJJ EL PIO CHE PAPU AJAJAJAJAJAJAJAAJAJAJAJAJAJAJAJAJAJAJAJAJA H AJA JK AJAKAJAKAKAJAKAJAKAJAKAJJJJJAJAJAJAJAKAKAKJAAKAKAAKKKJJJJJJAJAJAJAJJAJAJAJAJAJAJAJAJAJAJAJAJAJJKAJKKJAJAJJAJJJJJAJAJAJAJJ EL PIO CHE PAPU AJAJAJAJAJAJAJAAJAJAJAJAJAJAJAJAJAJAJAJAJA H AJA JK AJAKAJAKAKAJAKAJAKAJAKAJJJJJAJAJAJAJAKAKAKJAAKAKAAKKKJJJJJJAJAJAJAJJAJAJAJAJAJAJAJAJAJAJAJAJAJJKAJKKJAJAJJAJJJJJAJAJAJAJJ
EL PIO CHE PAPU AJAJAJAJAJAJAJAAJAJAJAJAJAJAJAJAJAJAJAJAJA H AJA JK AJAKAJAKAKAJAKAJAKAJAKAJJJJJAJAJAJAJAKAKAKJAAKAKAAKKKJJJJJJAJAJAJAJJAJAJAJAJAJAJAJAJAJAJAJAJAJJKAJKKJAJAJJAJJJJJAJAJAJAJJ
EL PIO CHE PAPU AJAJAJAJAJAJAJAAJAJAJAJAJAJAJAJAJAJAJAJAJA H AJA JK AJAKAJAKAKAJAKAJAKAJAKAJJJJJAJAJAJAJAKAKAKJAAKAKAAKKKJJJJJJAJAJAJAJJAJAJAJAJAJAJAJAJAJAJAJAJAJJKAJKKJAJAJJAJJJJJAJAJAJAJJ EL PIO CHE PAPU AJAJAJAJAJAJAJAAJAJAJAJAJAJAJAJAJAJAJAJAJA H AJA JK AJAKAJAKAKAJAKAJAKAJAKAJJJJJAJAJAJAJAKAKAKJAAKAKAAKKKJJJJJJAJAJAJAJJAJAJAJAJAJAJAJAJAJAJAJAJAJJKAJKKJAJAJJAJJJJJAJAJAJAJJ
EL PIO CHE PAPU AJAJAJAJAJAJAJAAJAJAJAJAJAJAJAJAJAJAJAJAJA H AJA JK AJAKAJAKAKAJAKAJAKAJAKAJJJJJAJAJAJAJAKAKAKJAAKAKAAKKKJJJJJJAJAJAJAJJAJAJAJAJAJAJAJAJAJAJAJAJAJJKAJKKJAJAJJAJJJJJAJAJAJAJJ EL PIO CHE PAPU AJAJAJAJAJAJAJAAJAJAJAJAJAJAJAJAJAJAJAJAJA H AJA JK AJAKAJAKAKAJAKAJAKAJAKAJJJJJAJAJAJAJAKAKAKJAAKAKAAKKKJJJJJJAJAJAJAJJAJAJAJAJAJAJAJAJAJAJAJAJAJJKAJKKJAJAJJAJJJJJAJAJAJAJJ
EL PIO CHE PAPU AJAJAJAJAJAJAJAAJAJAJAJAJAJAJAJAJAJAJAJAJA H AJA JK AJAKAJAKAKAJAKAJAKAJAKAJJJJJAJAJAJAJAKAKAKJAAKAKAAKKKJJJJJJAJAJAJAJJAJAJAJAJAJAJAJAJAJAJAJAJAJJKAJKKJAJAJJAJJJJJAJAJAJAJJ EL PIO CHE PAPU AJAJAJAJAJAJAJAAJAJAJAJAJAJAJAJAJAJAJAJAJA H AJA aaaaa

>unironically browsing buzzfeed

gb2 reddit

File: sub-buzz-11866-1488536560-5.jpg (97KB, 539x960px) Image search: [Google]

97KB, 539x960px

>>72030241
>muh heritage
americans are unhinged

>>72030311
dont click buzzfeed links you mong

>>72030247
ever heard of "martial law"? there are always specific provisions for certain situations, especially with war, have been for centuries

>>72030286
get fucked nick. you cant hide in canada

EL PIO CHE PAPU AJAJAJAJAJAJAJAAJAJAJAJAJAJAJAJAJAJAJAJAJA H AJA JK AJAKAJAKAKAJAKAJAKAJAKAJJJJJAJAJAJAJAKAKAKJAAKAKAAKKKJJJJJJAJAJAJAJJAJAJAJAJAJAJAJAJAJAJAJAJAJJKAJKKJAJAJJAJJJJJAJAJAJAJJ EL PIO CHE PAPU AJAJAJAJAJAJAJAAJAJAJAJAJAJAJAJAJAJAJAJAJA H AJA JK AJAKAJAKAKAJAKAJAKAJAKAJJJJJAJAJAJAJAKAKAKJAAKAKAAKKKJJJJJJAJAJAJAJJAJAJAJAJAJAJAJAJAJAJAJAJAJJKAJKKJAJAJJAJJJJJAJAJAJAJJSA THY CYCJ
EL PIO CHE PAPU AJAJAJAJAJAJAJAAJAJAJAJAJAJAJAJAJAJAJAJAJA H AJA JK AJAKAJAKAKAJAKAJAKAJAKAJJJJJAJAJAJAJAKAKAKJAAKAKAAKKKJJJJJJAJAJAJAJJAJAJAJAJAJAJAJAJAJAJAJAJAJJKAJKKJAJAJJAJJJJJAJAJAJAJJ EL PIO CHE PAPU AJAJAJAJAJAJAJAAJAJAJAJAJAJAJAJAJAJAJAJAJA H AJA JK AJAKAJAKAKAJAKAJAKAJAKAJJJJJAJAJAJAJAKAKAKJAAKAKAAKKKJJJJJJAJAJAJAJJAJAJAJAJAJAJAJAJAJAJAJAJAJJKAJKKJAJAJJAJJJJJAJAJAJAJJ
EL PIO CHE PAPU AJAJAJAJAJAJAJAAJAJAJAJAJAJAJAJAJAJAJAJAJA H AJA JK AJAKAJAKAKAJAKAJAKAJAKAJJJJJAJAJAJAJAKAKAKJAAKAKAAKKKJJJJJJAJAJAJAJJAJAJAJAJAJAJAJAJAJAJAJAJAJJKAJKKJAJAJJAJJJJJAJAJAJAJJ
EL PIO CHE PAPU AJAJAJAJAJAJAJAAJAJAJAJAJAJAJAJAJAJAJAJAJA H AJA JK AJAKAJAKAKAJAKAJAKAJAKAJJJJJAJAJAJAJAKAKAKJAAKAKAAKKKJJJJJJAJAJAJAJJAJAJAJAJAJAJAJAJAJAJAJAJAJJKAJKKJAJAJ JAJJJJJAJAJAJAJJ EL DIABLO
EL PIO CHE PAPU AJAJAJAJAJAJAJAAJAJAJAJAJAJAJAJAJAJAJAJAJA H AJA JK AJAKAJAKAKAJAKAJAKAJAKAJJJJJAJAJAJAJAKAKAKJAAKAKAAKKKJJJJJJAJAJAJAJJAJAJAJAJAJAJAJAJAJAJAJAJAJJKAJKKJAJAJJAJJJJJAJAJAJAJJ EL PIO CHE PAPU AJAJAJAJAJAJAJAAJAJAJAJAJAJAJAJAJAJAJAJAJA H AJA JK AJAKAJAKAKAJAKAJAKAJAKAJJJJJAJAJAJAJAKAKAKJAAKAKAAKKKJJJJJJAJAJAJAJJAJAJAJAJAJAJAJAJAJAJAJAJAJJKAJKKJAJAJJAJJJJJAJAJAJAJJ TIENE EL PIO CHE PAPU AJAJAJAJAJAJAJAAJAJAJAJAJAJAJAJAJAJAJAJAJA H AJA JK AJAKAJAKAKAJAKAJAKAJAKAJJJJJAJAJAJAJAKAKAKJAAKAKAAKKKJJJJJJAJAJAJAJJAJAJAJAJAJAJAJAJAJAJAJAJAJJKAJKKJAJAJJAJJJJJAJAJAJAJJ
EL PIO CHE PAPU AJAJAJAJAJAJAJAAJAJAJAJAJAJAJAJAJAJAJAJAJA H AJA CONTROL EL PIO CHE PAPU AJAJAJAJAJAJAJAAJAJAJAJAJAJAJAJAJAJAJAJAJA H AJA JK AJAKAJAKAKAJAKAJAKAJAKAJJJJJAJAJAJAJAKAKAKJAAKAKAAKKKJJJJJJAJAJAJAJJAJAJAJAJAJAJAJAJAJAJAJAJAJJKAJKKJAJAJJAJJJJJAJAJAJAJJ

>>72030311
White Americans are delusional on such a massive scale. They've mostly got English/Scottish first names or surnames but they all claim to be Italian or German. I'm surprised that it's not a meme on /int/ and /pol/, I think it rivals "we wuz kangz" for sheer delusion.

File: IMG_9035.png (559KB, 750x1334px) Image search: [Google]

559KB, 750x1334px

>>72030311
what a sad cunt.

hes handsome. why is he so desperate?

>>72030243
I'm gonna be a smartarse and show my lack of JF-ness:
River City and Pobol y Cwm

>>72030353
his last name is vedovi desu

>>72030332
the united states is not currently under martial law and there is currently no statute that allows for extrajudicial executions of american citizens regardless of their actions

File: not impressed.jpg (73KB, 720x960px) Image search: [Google]

73KB, 720x960px

>yanks discussing a buzzfeed article.

File: maxresdefault.jpg (30KB, 1280x720px) Image search: [Google]

30KB, 1280x720px

I've been doing a lot of shitposting lately... I'll see a thread about, you know, Tartakovskidinsky, or some perfect French intellectual, making his clever, sophisticated films about death and his rasberry jam...

*drags on cigarette*

...I'll see this thread and I go HA! IT'S SHIT! YOU'RE SHIT! Everything about you is so knee-stabbingly bad I hope you suffer from shingles.

*drinks wine*

And then I'll get banned. Because the person I was replying to is a mod. But I don't care. I HAVE A THOUSAND PROXIES, EACH MORE COMPLEX THAN THE LAST HAHAHAaaaaah... press submit. Submit times a million.

I wish I had a mouse with a hundred buttons on it so I could lie down on it and press them all simultaneously and submit a hundred posts, all in the same thread, every one of them about my waifu.

>>72030332
>ever heard of "martial law"?

Sounds like that thing my wife keeps bringing up every time I beat her

File: Harry-Hill-010.jpg (10KB, 300x180px) Image search: [Google]

10KB, 300x180px

Anybody remember MySpace? Hm? MySpace? Have you seen my MySpace? That's where they went wrong, isn't it, starting the name of a website, made out of individual, personalised web pages, with the word "my."

"Have you seen MySpace?"
"Yes I have a page on there actually..."
"Nooooooo... Have you seen MY space... My space, as in the area allocated to me by the parking authority."
"Dohhohohhohh."

And the 4chan, hm? Have you seen the 4chan? That's what the kids are on now, isn't it? The 4chan. First there was 2chan, now there's 4chan, WHERE WILL IT END?

I often wonder, I often wonder if there was a 1chan, but it was so obscure literally nobody has heard of it.

Because you have 4chan, don't you? You have 4chan, quite popular. 4chan, quite popular, hm? And before that you had 2chan, not very popular. Before that, was there 1chan? 1chan, COMPLETELY INVISIBLE.

*sings*

OH... 1chan, 2chan, 3chan, 4,
Posting on the 4chan, cos that's what it's for!

>>72030184
ah fooken did

you're NOT the boss of me

File: maxresdefault(2).jpg (44KB, 1280x720px) Image search: [Google]

44KB, 1280x720px

So there's this thing called the internet, as I'm sure you're aware, and on the internet there's a site called 4chan, which is basically a bunch of idiotic halfwits complaining that everyone else is "off-topic."

The thing is, on 4chan, everyone posts with the same name, Anonymous (which ironically isn't actually a name but rather a determination that one HAS no name). You'd think that would be confusing, but all of these people are so terribly simple minded that the only things they manage to write on there are so meaningless that nobody cares who's addressing who anyway.

It's all just one big textual cauldron of nonesense, arranged in little blue boxes which have numbers in the corner to impose some semblance of order on this festival of bullshit.

Oh, and there's "dubs." "Dub's" is where these simpletons actually celebrate the fact that their previous little box, or the little box of another moron, has been assigned a number that ends with the same two digits. Kind of like when the odometer in your car reaches the point where it turns to ten thousand miles and you see the numbers all turn over at the same time and get a mild feeling of satisfaction, it's that, but on the most pitiful scale imaginable.

THERE'S A ONE IN TEN CHANCE OF THIS HAPPENING, IT'S NOT AN ACHIEVEMENT, STOP BEING IMPRESSED BY INEVITABLE RECURRENCES OF THE SAME NUMBER BEING DISPLAYED TWICE IN A ROW, GET YOUR HEADS OUT OF YOUR ARSES, GO OUTSIDE AND GET A FUCKING LIFE!

>>72030359
he's average looking at best and clearly has autism

>>72030395
get over it you stupid cunt.

its a funny story of some "alpha" getting exposed for being a sniveling little twat and getting fucked over from it

who cares what source its from. its funny

>>72030437

ha ha i bet it was an epic win bro! XD

File: 'dora81.jpg (63KB, 1024x819px) Image search: [Google]

63KB, 1024x819px

>get over it you stupid cunt.

>its a funny story of some "alpha" getting exposed for being a sniveling little twat and getting fucked over from it

>who cares what source its from. its funny

>>72030451
>>72030454
haha it was bait. get fucked hahaha

File: eddie izzard - dress to kill 196_0001.jpg (28KB, 512x368px) Image search: [Google]

28KB, 512x368px

So, yeah... The internet... WOW... Lot of FREAKS on there, eh? Ha ha, so of course, I fit right in... which is groovy...

Lot of weirdos, lot of good weirdos, SOME bad weirdos but for the really weirdy weirdos you gotta go to the CHANS... The CHANS, MAN... That's where all the hip happening crazy cats are doing there thing posting about... Well, cats, a lot of the time, but also WEIRD shit like "what if I took off your MASK, would you DIE? Or would there be ANOTHER mask underneath, with six eyes and a nose made of pom-poms...?"

And there's this BIG, fuck off, GUY! Who says "For you..." and then jumps out a plane and goes splat.

But yeah... And another thing, they have WAIFUS, which is basically a way of all sharing the same gorgeous supermodel Hollywood movie star BABE, in their MINDS, yeah... But they ARGUE! Who is the BEST WAIFU? So they fight and fight and fight and finally they decide it by all agreeing that it feels bad to NOT have a girlfriend, and that they all share that feel, together, like eggs in a basket...

No not like eggs in a basket, like fish, in a... bath, like spoons in a drawer... Full of forks which are cool and knives which are... groovy...

>>72030437
It's rabid cunts destroying a bloke's life over some petty shit and patting themselves on the back.

It's cancer and so are you.

File: sub-buzz-5245-1488452354-2.jpg (105KB, 539x960px) Image search: [Google]

105KB, 539x960px

>>72030359
lel he's amazingly insecure
doesn't matter how good-looking you are, you can still be fully self-conscious

>>72030353
it is a meme though, even outside 4chan everyone knows about americans and muh heritage
it's funny, the way they see it is to be british is like stock ancentry and anything that deviates from that is more important

File: mti4odm2nje0mja5mjq3nzew.jpg (52KB, 620x927px) Image search: [Google]

52KB, 620x927px

>>72030433
>>72030437
/r/hapas was right

>>72030437
it's fucking retarded and you're a fucking retard for being amused by it

>haha chad BTFO xDD
>no racism allowed!
>epic win gettting him fired :D

you're like the sjw version of /pol/

>>72030472
you're 28 and you post on 4chan you sad fucking cunt

if anyones cancer its you

File: SpaceGhost wıþ mug.jpg (24KB, 226x166px) Image search: [Google]

24KB, 226x166px

>"dora81.jpg"
>81

File: Billy Connolly .jpg (25KB, 620x321px) Image search: [Google]

25KB, 620x321px

Hev ye SEEN that INTERNEHT lately? Et's awl "YOU'RE a big guy, HE'S a big guy, AHM a big guy, everybawdy's a fuckin' BIG GUY!" Ah cannae underSTAHND ET.

And these FUCKIN MEEMS! They're EVERYWHEAR! Tha phone rang the other day an somebawdy answered et, an ah said "who's et fir?" an they said "Billy, et's FIR YOO!" Ah said "GET TAE FUCK with yir MEEMS! AH cannae STAND ET!"

So ahm lookin' at thess, eh, FOORchan, an there's thess MEEM, and et's called BRAVO! Et's awl BRAVO NOLAN, an BRAVO JOSS. Ah think et's mebbe from that Simpsons show, aye, bit they've taken et, an turned it intae BRAVO ANYBODY!

They're WALKIN down theyr ROAD, an they see theyr man, an et's BRAVO JIMMY! Instead of HELLO!

BRAVO JIMMY! AYE, BRAVO BILLY! CRAZY!

>>72030492
yankeepoo's getting upset!

>>72030492
Do you need a tissue?

>>72030491
Not even the same person but I found it mildly funny. Not as fascinated it by he is, but it gave me a chuckle.

>>72030497
9 more until 100 but the runts just keep posting the same ones

File: Screenshot_2017-03-08-17-38-19.png (497KB, 768x1280px) Image search: [Google]

497KB, 768x1280px

Everyone I match on tinder falls into

A) bot
B) can't speak English properly
C) doesn't reply
D) generally undesirable

Example of D given above

>>72030511
why would you abandon your dad after your mum died?

youre a piece of shit desu.

File: PAY-Scottish-referendum.jpg (219KB, 1840x1227px) Image search: [Google]

219KB, 1840x1227px

>>72030501
Excellent post

File: JS59856128.jpg (26KB, 615x409px) Image search: [Google]

26KB, 615x409px

Ah like the enternet, Ah like how it brings people together, ye know? That's becawse ahm a sexual preydator.

Theyrs a groop on tha enternet cawled anone-a-mas. Ah done thenk ye need tae use tha name anone-a-mas tae hide yir aydentaty tho, jis done use yir real name, ye know? Use anotha name. Fir exahmple, ah use tha name mahdelen mackann, en tha hopes hir parents will see et an thenk tha enternet es haunted bah tha ghost ef thir deed daughtar.

Emagine ef Jimmy Savelle hed had access tae tha enternet. Heh cood hev fexed et fir everyboady... Tae hev thir cheldren be raped by ah TV celebretae end knight ev tha realm! Ah thenk he would hev loved tha enternet tho, and ah thenk ef Jimmy Savelle hed hed tha enternet then bah noo et would beh win hundrid pircent chahld poorn ensted ev jest ninetae fav pircent...

>>72030477
>sends the middle finger emoji

this lad is a fucking riot

how can someone be so lacking in self awareness?

File: ð'owd fedoora.png (1MB, 1300x1038px) Image search: [Google]

1MB, 1300x1038px

>>72030518
I'm giving this in return for that informative (You).

>>72030530
She would probably make a nice housewife

>>72030535
lol mate, calm down.

>>72030491
its funny that tinder banned him . ive done worse things on tinder

>>72030530
She'd probably be appreciative 2bh
would give it a shot

>>72030530
looks 18
would

File: russell-brand-messiah-complex.png (632KB, 1156x771px) Image search: [Google]

632KB, 1156x771px

Ah've been on that internet again right... An' it's always bin a bit wonky annit, always bin a bit weird yeah? But ah givvit another go 'cos like, it's technology and that innit, it's the MODERN AGE, where the marvels and wondrous digital contraptions brought forth by the electronic magicians truly boggle the contents of one's consciousness!

So ah went on there right an' this geezer went to me, ah dunno 'oo it woz coz like his name was "Anonymous," an' I'm pretty sure that wasn't 'iz real name, or if it woz, iz parents must've been on sumfing FUCKING MENTAL...

But anyway ee's come up to me on the internet right, on this site called 4chan which at first glance looks kind of like just a load of pictures an' writing an' that, sort of like a book, but the literary contents are NOT reminiscent of any TOME, VOLUME or PARCHMENT upon which yor 'umble narrator has ever set his gaze... WHERE WOZ I... THIS GEEZER, ee's gone: "'Ere," I sez "Wot," an 'e goes "For you."

I deliberated muchly on this pearl of unbridled wisdom, worthy perhaps of Descartes or else some other philosophical dabbler of his ilk, an' fort to myself "Not this again" coz it must've bin the fifteemf time somebody seddit on there in like ten minutes! Or mebbe it wuz the same geezer I dunno, EVERYONE'S FUCKIN' ANONYMOUS!

So, not one to leave such mysterious verbal fruit dangling before me, ah sed to 'im: "Oi m8, wot's yor fuckin' problem? 4 me? Wot's 4 me?" An this OSCAR WILDE of wit and charm told me to fack off back to Riddit! I said "Excuse me bravva, I don't meen no disrespect or noffin' but mebbe YOU need to fuck off back to SKOOL, because YOU seem to be in dire desperate NEED of some educational and academical enlightenment!"

I dote know if it was just him callin' me a faggot twenty times, or twenty different Anonymouses, each one calling me a faggot, or some statistical comprisation between the two right, but ah basically got called a faggot twenty times... Not very modern AFTER ALL!

>>72030472
should serve as a warning not to use social media and if you do be very careful with it

>>72030551
are you going to answer the question?

nice son you are. at least you make it up to him by skyping him every few months

28 year old pathetic fuck

>>72030576
Which Thairunt are you referring to here

>>72030530
good waifu material

pounce on that

File: sub-buzz-10084-1488472634-1.jpg (118KB, 625x1112px) Image search: [Google]

118KB, 625x1112px

>>72030472
the other stuff is irrelevant, the guy himself is a gold mine

>>72030581
the british one

>>72030569
True enough, doesn't matter if you're protected by law, freedom of speech goes both ways.
>>72030576
You're just making shit up, you can't even get my age right, what makes you think you know anything about my parents?

>>72030592
righto
This one writes different to thailad tho, think it's that other proxy bloke

File: 8a2800b9f1eb68f717add761930f9450.jpg (23KB, 425x308px) Image search: [Google]

23KB, 425x308px

HEY so ahhh, this whole internet thing has got me really stressed out. I go on the internet, and there's these FUCKIN'... I don't even know how to describe 'em. They call each other NECKBEARDS, ha ha, that's how fuckin' pathetic these people are.

But they fuckin stress me out man, cos when I'm like, tryin' to talk about some shit, you know in like a forum or whatever, these CUNTS, these fuckin ANIMALS are THERE, TYPIN AWAY, OH it's brutal.

I can take abuse, y'know, I mean look at me. Look at my red, ginger fuckin face and tell me I can't take some shit. But when RETARDS, FUCKIN... ARRGH! Some stupid CUNT is just like, he's sayin' "implying you're not a newfag," THAT'S WHAT HE SAID TO ME! IS THAT EVEN ENGLISH? And this fuckin NERD even made his, all his text go green like he's some fuckin computer hacker! I was scared he was gonna hack ME! and MY SHIT!

All I wanted to do was talk about my Breaking Bad shit on the internet. PLEB! THAT'S IT, That's what they called me, fuckin' PLEB! THE FUCK DOES THAT MEAN?

>>72030591
FUCKKK OFF YOU CANCER

HURRR ITS FROM LEFTISt SJW SITe

FUCKK OFFFF MUH SECRIT RIGHT CLUB


FUKC OFFFFFFFFFF CANCER XD NEWFAG CANCER!!!!!

this is a 28 year old talking like this.

File: 12332.jpg (38KB, 375x500px) Image search: [Google]

38KB, 375x500px

Properly wound this yank up, I have.

File: plagiarists_corner-shelley-v-lee-lee-300x190.jpg (18KB, 300x190px) Image search: [Google]

18KB, 300x190px

I was on the internet the other day, and there was this person on there, on your internet, on your world wide web... Called Anonymous.
And I don't know what this person does for a living, don't know what he looks like... I couldn't tell you ladies and gentlemen if he is a he or a she. But this person, this "Anonymous," this Anonymous sure does POST A LOT OF RUBBISH.

*produces piece of paper and reads from it*

"FOR YOU."
"YOU'RE A BIG GUY."
"I BET YOU ENJOY THE MOVIES OF WES ANDERSON."
"WHAT HAPPENED TO YOUR QUEER PARTY FRIENDS?"
And this one's my favourite:
"BRAVO NOLAN."

It seems the new, technologically literate generation socialize exclusively by repeating, word for word, what they've seen on the internet and the more they've seen it repeated, the more acceptable it is to repeat it again...

BABBAGE, BERNERS-LEE, THEIR DREAMS REALISED... THE WORLD CONNECTED LIKE NEVER BEFORE... WONDROUS MACHINES TRANSMITTING TRILLIONS OF PIECES OF INFORMATION A SECOND...

*reads from piece of paper*

"THAT FEEL WHEN NO G F!"

>>72030601
fuck off

thailad is a proper bloke

File: 1488869952413.jpg (12KB, 319x244px) Image search: [Google]

12KB, 319x244px

>>72030601
https://youtu.be/DDvaqEQStCY#t=2

>>72030535
>"why would you abandon your dad after your mum died?"
source is what?

File: wmeyztqgnbjy.jpg (83KB, 564x849px) Image search: [Google]

83KB, 564x849px

Ah yes, heterosexuality.

>>72030591
>dat damage control

chuckling irl desu

>>72030644
his bum

File: 1280x720-mAb.jpg (89KB, 1280x720px) Image search: [Google]

89KB, 1280x720px

Hey y'all, what's up with that internet thing you're all just goin' fuckin' CRAZY about, huh?

"Hey Bill, you on the Facebook?" NO! NO I'm not on the Facebook, ya fuckin RETARD. Hey, government spies, ya don't need to dig through trash anymore, WE'LL JUST PUT OUR ENTIRE LIVES! RIGHT UP THERE ON YOUR WEBSITE FOR YA!

Isn't it amazing? You spend DECADES, spying on your citizens, parked across the street with telephoto lenses, just -snap- -snap- "Oh ah got a gud wun there Jim ah think he's in the tub ahuh huh..." And all you needed was to say "HEY! ASSHOLES! SIGN UP FOR OUR FREE INFORMATION EXCHANGE! IT'S FREE! That's it you fuckers, get all your pictures of the kids up there, all your bikini holiday pics, get everyone you EVER talked to in a nice orderly list, it's okay, WE WON'T USE IT TO CHECK FOR DISSIDENTS! WE WON'T USE IT TO MOULD SOCIETY, INTO AN ORWELLIAN NIGHTMARE..."

>>72030679
vry funny image agai nkaren..! keith x

>>72030644
his dad doesnt live with his mum, he's admitted that.

he also gets real offended whenever you bring up his mum

File: 1488747848977.gif (3MB, 644x472px) Image search: [Google]

3MB, 644x472px

What's his fucking problem?

File: 1488749060725.jpg (126KB, 780x1012px) Image search: [Google]

126KB, 780x1012px

>>72030691
Those minions sure are a riot........
Mum and dad x

File: 1477344455676.jpg (75KB, 640x478px) Image search: [Google]

75KB, 640x478px

*didgeridoos playing in the distance*

File: ccsu_leary_douchebags_drugs.jpg (644KB, 1920x1080px) Image search: [Google]

644KB, 1920x1080px

Hey folks, what is up with this internet thing you're all just goin' fuckin' CRAZY about, huh?

"Hey Denis, you on the Facebook?" NO! NO I am NOT on the FACEBOOK, ya fuckin RETARD. Hey, government spies, ya don't need to dig through trash anymore, WE'LL JUST PUT OUR ENTIRE LIVES! RIGHT UP THERE ON YOUR WEBSITE FOR YA!

It's amazing, you spend decades SPYING on your citizens, PARKED across the street with telephoto lenses, just -snap- -snap- "Oh ah got a gud wun there Jimbo ah think he's in the tub ahuh huh..." And all you needed was to say "HEY ASSHOLES! SIGN UP FOR OUR FREE INFORMATION EXCHANGE! IT'S FREE! That's it you fuckers, get all your pictures of the kids up there, all your bikini holiday pics, get everyone you EVER talked to in a nice orderly list, it's okay, WE WON'T USE IT TO CHECK FOR DISSIDENTS! WE WON'T USE IT TO MOULD SOCIETY INTO AN ORWELLIAN NIGHTMARE..."

>>72030693
You flatter yourself if you think your stories are even remotely offensive.

File: can he ever recover？.png (97KB, 292x361px) Image search: [Google]

97KB, 292x361px

Whence are all these comedians' posts coming?


>>72030702

>>72030737
need a russell howard one

Don't fuck with my love

File: 1488954094682.jpg (41KB, 515x306px) Image search: [Google]

41KB, 515x306px

What has /brit/ become?

Need a Phil Jupitus one. God, what a screaming child. Although think he's calmed down a bit now.

File: alexjones-screencap-infowars.png (145KB, 790x444px) Image search: [Google]

145KB, 790x444px

Hi folks, now... What's up with that internet thing you're all just goin' fuckin' CRAZY about, huh?

Sometimes my friends say to me: "Hey Alex, you on the Facebook?" NO! NO I'm not on the Facebook, you you you GOVERNMENT SHILL! Hey, government SPIES! HI THERE! Ya don't need to dig through my trash anymore, I'LL JUST PUT MY ENTIRE LIFE RIGHT UP THERE ON YOUR TELESCREEN FOR YOU TO SPY ON!

Isn't it amazing? You spend DECADES, spying on the American people, parked across the street with these big, weird telephoto lenses, just going -snap- -snap- "Oh ah got a gud wun there Obama ah think he's in the tub ahuh huh..." And all the FBI needed to say was "OH HEY there, SHEEPLE! SIGN UP FOR OUR FREE INFORMATION EXCHANGE! IT'S FREE! That's it you ants, you brainwashed morons, get all your pictures of the kids up there, all your bikini holiday pics, get everyone you EVER talked to in a nice orderly list, it's okay, WE WON'T USE IT TO CHECK FOR WATER FILTERS! WE WON'T USE IT TO MOULD SOCIETY, INTO A NEW WORLD ORDER..."

File: 1368756900684.png (20KB, 600x600px) Image search: [Google]

20KB, 600x600px

>ywn be a spy

File: damn.png (805KB, 722x709px) Image search: [Google]

805KB, 722x709px

Imagine what they'd be saying about this guy if he was unattractive looking

>>72030843
>>>/r9k/

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=hz-crDWmINk

File: Jo-Brand.jpg (34KB, 220x220px) Image search: [Google]

34KB, 220x220px

I went on the internet... I heard you can order food off the internet now, so I was interested in THAT, obviously...

ERM...

And it turns out it's nearly all men on there, which probably explains why they're all so STUPID!

ERM...

But I thought, "this is fantastic!" A community of people, all as fat as me!

ERM...

So I told those people on this website "4chan," that I AM a woman, and one of them asked if I'd sit on his cock! I said okay, but it would be extremely painful...

>>72030635
*proper nonce

After a year on /brit/ I have gained their trust and cemented my position as 'one of them'

I believe now I can start flowing key information back to HQ

>>72030843
Ah yes, the blandest looking 20 something year old.

File: Oriental (2) — the chink in sherlock season 1 episode 2 is fit for days.png (4KB, 167x173px) Image search: [Google]

4KB, 167x173px

>>72030635
this, he's only ever been fair to me.
>>72030874
also this

File: cosby-himself.jpg (11KB, 480x360px) Image search: [Google]

11KB, 480x360px

Now, I'm on thuh world, wide, web, okay? And there's kids, calling each other ALL KINDS of bad names. Every insult you can think of, these kids are saying to each other, you see? And most of 'em, most of 'em I can't understand.

There's this one boy, okay, and he says this bad name to another boy, he says "you're a big guy." He's calling him fat now you see? now I thought... ALL of these internet people are fat, but that's what he says, "you're a big guy..."

And the other one, the smartmouth one (you know what I mean), the smartmouth kid comes back with, now HE says, "for... you!" That's what he says, "for you," you see because he's fat for him. For... For you it means "I'm a big guy, but only from your skinny point of view," now...

And, heh heh, that ended the conversation right there, there was no more "you're a big guy," heh heh.

>>72030888
Good hair
Good body
Good face

Easy 7/10

really nailing some of these comedians
wonder who wrote them, doubt anyone in /brit/ is capable of this much originality

>>72030879
What's there to tell them?
Everyone's willy:height ratio?

>>72030933
they are coming too fast and too well edited, doubtful he's writing them right now on the spot

>>72030933
both brands have been best, jo and russell. probably came from reddit.

>>72030930
Maybe for women.
I'm gay.

File: maxresdefault(3).jpg (41KB, 1280x720px) Image search: [Google]

41KB, 1280x720px

So... 4chan. You guys ever been on this website? Fucking. Weird. For those of you who haven't, uhm, been on this thing, let me just give you a little sample. Here it goes. 4chan. Ya ready? Okay.

"You're a faggot!"
"You're a retard!"

So far so good? We can all... recognise this behaviour this is normal behaviour on the internet, right? But then it goes, then it goes weird because then it goes:

"You're a faggot."
"You're a big guy."
"For you."

WHAT THE FUCK DOES THAT MEAN? Is it CODE? FUCKING weird, that's all I'm sayin'. Like two spies, disguised as participants in a movie discussion group!

Report 1: the yanks here seem to have below-average intelligence and wit, even compared to the average yank. Fascinating. Suggestion to HQ that they might be used as suitable test subjects.

>>72030868
once youve been redpilled there is no going back

File: george_carlin2.jpg (38KB, 445x668px) Image search: [Google]

38KB, 445x668px

You ever notice on the internet, anyone who knows more than you is a loser, and everyone who knows less than you is a newfag?

And everything... EVERYTHING on the internet is divided up into little convenient categories... we got the random board, the anime, the gay girls, trap girls, young girls, old girls, fun girls, fat girls, boy girls and gay boys! And if you don't have a board you like you can *POP* make one yourself just like that! And we wonder why kids aren't studying as much as they used to anymore? When I was a kid the only board WE had was the blackboard... It was a good board, because anytime you didn't want to see the porn or bad language on it, you just *WOOSH* erased your history!

And on the internet, everything is made using metaphoric language, you ever noticed that? Think about it? Download? Why down? Why load? Are we comparing hard drives to loading docks now? I know a couple dockworkers who would be PRETTY embarassed by some of the language if they went on 4chan!

But then when you put something from your hard drive onto the internet, that's an UPload... Why? Why not left-load? Or right-load? "Hey, Tony, have you been left-loading music again?" "No, Ma, I swear, I was just right-loading a torrent!"

File: 49cjpwp03.jpg (40KB, 328x378px) Image search: [Google]

40KB, 328x378px

>>72030976
https://youtu.be/KX3uCmbFUFg

Osaki Maas Central HQ.

>>72031032
have done this many a time haha

>>72031012

This is the superior choon


https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=si6VNKfZj6g
Aryans in the street, but you know they don't riot
We fascist, and fascists don't riot, we march
And we only come for race traitors, jews and kebabs
non-Whites don't get admission to the European sectors
No more bomb alarms and metal detectors
And there really ain't a need for democratic elections
cause all the people give the leader their blessings

amphetamines or coke for uppers lads? getting them off alfabay so purity is not an issue

From watching porn a lot of Germans look like Brits.

<iframe width="560" height="315" src="https://www.youtube.com/embed/ZIOu5_G4Uc4" frameborder="0" allowfullscreen></iframe>

having a coffee from my mums tassimo machine
it's so thick, it's like treacle

>>72031053
I don't get it

>>72031064
dont do drugs

>>72031072
hmm maybe that has something to do with both being germanic people

just a thought

>>72030933
looks like /tv/ with the odd baneposting thrown in

>>72031044
Lots of them were shoah'd, good that people are reuploading.

Report 2: latest statements from yanks (pills, iframes, 'don't get it) seem to confirm report 1.

Will update as occurs.

File: 81330113-comedian-chris-rock-gives-a-press-conference-on-june-2.jpg.CROP.promovar-mediumlarge.jpg (20KB, 590x395px) Image search: [Google]

20KB, 590x395px

Anybody notice how RACIST the innernet is now? Now that WHITE folks know that NOBODY CAN GIT 'EM for sayin' shit online?

Before, white folks was like "well black folks still commit a bunch of crime you know (oooh I wonder if I'll get away with sayin' this) and you know, black folks is..."

And now it's just "niggerniggerniggernigger..." All day long! I'm SERIOUS! White folks on the internet just "niggerniggernigger..." because they KNOW nobody know it's THEM!

Next day, out at McDonald's you KNOW they be like "thank you sir..." to the black dude behind the counter, they be all like "thank you kind sir" to the black dude then they git home and git on that innernet and jus' "niggerniggerniggerniggernigger... Nigger this, nigger that..."

It's HYPOCRISY!
It's HYPOCRISY!
WHEN YOU HIDIN' WHO YOU ARE it's HYPOCRISY!

>>72031097
im going to be drinking lots of alcohol and dont want to fall asleep

>>72031064
Amphetamines, cheaper and last longer

I've been included in a report to Ozzy hq lads :3

File: ja w tej chwili — «Właśnie prychnął linię, na zdrowie.».jpg (628KB, 1536x1024px) Image search: [Google]

628KB, 1536x1024px

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=XvtiDKI3tzQ
https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=apYyM3MY--o

File: Screenshot_2017-03-08-18-18-33.png (515KB, 768x1280px) Image search: [Google]

515KB, 768x1280px

Hmmmmmm

File: charlie-brooker-wipe1.png (782KB, 1284x856px) Image search: [Google]

782KB, 1284x856px

/tv/ is a message board about THINGS that have to do with TELEVISION

Yes, in what is the most useless example of time wasting since Ed Milliband, people are routinely subjected to amateur discussions of film which is NORMALLY the sort of thing you'd have to go to university for but is now apparently given away for FREE on the internet.

It has a vibrant cast including a sort of swirly shit, an idiot, Susan Boyle's overweight brother and a token GRILL who does grill things like talk about lipstick and giggle like this nyehhehehee

Swirly shit man is in charge of starting threads, running about his bedroom and pulling a weird face like he's got a HUGE COCK in his MOUTH

Each week, this gaggle of PRICKS gather together and discuss TELEVISION as though what they're doing matters to anybody and isn't just a desperate attempt to fill time before everyone inevitably keels over DEAD

I wonder if Turks or Arabs have Turkish or Arab guilt in the same way westerners have white guilt they did all the same conquering, genociding and enslaving we did.

File: 110114tvh_rickygervaisshow1.jpg (19KB, 350x262px) Image search: [Google]

19KB, 350x262px

Apparently... right... there's this channel on the internet.
>I think you misunderstood something.
No, really, it's, there's a channel 4 on the internet. They have kids, and television, and animals.
>Is this a monkey news? Should we play the-- play the intro, do it.
>AWWWWWW CHIMPANZEE THAT HE'S GONE AND WRITTEN IT DOWN
Alright? They show this bloke, from the batman films, and he's knockin' about on a plane... and they say he's a big guy. I think he sounds like... he sounds like the guy who played James Bond.
>Of course.
Now I wouldn't say he's a big guy, I'm probably... I would say I'm probably the same size as him.
>Do you have any idea what he's talking about?
>I've no idea what he's on about. A plane in the batman film? Do you mean the third one, with Tom Hardy?
Yeah, he's got a mask on, and he's--
>Karl, what the fuck are you on about, there's a channel on the internet that shows Tom Hardy on the plane in Batman over and over?
>That's a good movie.
>I thought it was shit.
They say he's a big guy. And then it's, for you.
>What?
For... for you.
>Don't talk shit, Karl. I swear to god that was the most useless waste of time we've ever had on this show.

>>72031172
Fucking racist

>>72031161
>Swirly shit man is in charge of starting threads, running about his bedroom and pulling a weird face like he's got a HUGE COCK in his MOUTH

this should really have "like your mum" at the end

File: 1488852476133.png (630KB, 939x273px) Image search: [Google]

630KB, 939x273px

now why would a cat smoke a pipe?!

Didn't realise Thai lad was a nazi

>>72031196
BBC News (((World)))

File: 1474870977358.jpg (86KB, 634x474px) Image search: [Google]

86KB, 634x474px

>>72031198
>not being a Nazi
get with the times

>>72031196
I don't get it

File: 5766658234777600.png (502KB, 688x350px) Image search: [Google]

502KB, 688x350px

I WAS LOOKIN' AT THAT 4CHAN, AND IT'S ALL ABOUT THE DARK KNIGHT RISES NOW!

*paces back and forth and sweats profusely*

AND PEOPLE ARE JUST REPEATING LINES FROM ONE OF THE SCENES IN IT, OVER AND OVER AGAIN!

*exaggerated typing gestures, pulls goofy face, repeats same typing action and face 3 times*

AND ALL THEY SAY IS, "YOU'RE A BIG GUY!" YOU'RE A BIG GUY!

*mimes reading text from a monitor and reacting by pointing at himself with a quizzical expression, looks behind himself (checking for "big guys"), looks intensely into "monitor" as if double-checking what he's read*

I'M NOT A BIG GUY, I'M FIVE FOOT EIGHT! AND THEN THEY SAY, THEN THEY SAY, "FOR YOU!" FOR ME?

*points at self with quizzical expression*

WHAT'S FOR ME?

*looks around computer, holds monitor close to his face and stares into it intensely, looks behind and under computer trying to find whatever is "for him"*

APPARENTLY, THEY'RE TALKING ABOUT BANE!

*exasperated shrug, mimes picking up sledgehammer and smashing computer*

>>72031131
price is not an issue. I want to take the uppers so I can keep going well into the night despite being dickered, im also looking to pull. I wouldnt tweak too hard on amphetamines would I ? Also would it affect my cock?

>>72031196
mr patriachy, I'm loli

Still have nightmares about secondary and high school, exams and confrontations with teachers even though I have a PhD.

we must secure the existence of our people and a future for white children

>>72031198
I'm just in it for the chic uniforms.

File: flat,1000x1000,075,f.u1.jpg (185KB, 1000x1000px) Image search: [Google]

185KB, 1000x1000px

>>72031228
lmao bruce

>>72031178
thanks i like these x

FASH HOP

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=UWzBkmGydjw

Why is it that International Womens Day falls on the same day as Squeal Like an Angry Male Chauvinist Pig Day?

Starting a PhD in chemistry in July lads

Quite looking forward to it

how can normies shuffle off to work every day? what drives them?

i hope to never be like them

>>72031269
lol tell me about it!!!!!!

big titted girls are always sort of fat

>>72031283
NEEEEEERRRRRRRRRRRRRRDDD

every day seems to be some wank made up holiday

I would like to dedicate today to my Mummy :)

>>72031232
Last night I had a dream that I got my AS results. Got 2 A*s, one A, 2 Ds and a U

Poo in the Crewe

>>72031292
Money

rancid post

>>72031339
plenty of people don't make much at all and still slave away at some horrid unrewarding job

File: maxresdefault(4).jpg (195KB, 1920x1080px) Image search: [Google]

195KB, 1920x1080px

I've been on 4chan once Stephen

Have you?

Yeah I didn't like it

Why not?

They were talking about crab legs

Crab legs?

Yeah and about eating them at the movies

What? How preposterous

The thing is though, they were like, me I'd serve crab legs, you don't get service at the movies, at least I never had

You know there was place in Texas that served beer and other non standard cinema things when I was over there

I'll never understand Americans

>>72031292
a reason to get out of bed, shower and get out of the house.

>>72031356
Without that money they're probably not going to be paying rent or eating though.

>>72031384
those things are important why?

>>72031412
they precipitate apex moments in life

>>72031372
Why doesn't he make his Tuesday Club podcast anymore?

Found out the girl I'm interested in is into male vocalists and classical singing, so I've been practicing my singing and plan to serenade her with "Music of the Night" from Phantom of the Opera

NEED a bf who cheats on me.

File: feels like laborious ethea.jpg (168KB, 439x810px) Image search: [Google]

168KB, 439x810px

>>72031412
motivation to keep living and a sense of vital purpose. how many people in unemployment can genuinely say they are happy?

>>72031447
With the state of leafs I'm not even sure whether this is a joke

>>72031246
Cheers. I wrote all of them except the George Carlin, Ricky Gervais, and QI ones. I think someone else came up with the idea for the Denis Leary one as well (copying the Bill Hicks one).

Made a bunch of them for /tv/ in a stand up comedy thread about 2-3 years ago, then the next day someone was reposting them so I joined in and did a load more, and then others gave it a go. Some were better than others. Only found /brit/ a couple of months ago, was a bit bored today and remembered that old /tv/ thread so I thought I'd dump them.

That thread is archived here:
archive.4plebs.org/tv/thread/42429528/
There are a few more there but I think I've posted the best ones here.

I can't take credit for the idea, they're inspired by a screencap I saw of someone doing Jerry Seinfeld, and that was about 6 years ago. I was thinking about doing Russell Howard and maybe Phil Jupitus as per a request ITT but I haven't seen much of their stand up. Maybe later.

>>72031499
Oh and someone else did the Charlie Brooker one as well. I've got one more I did if I can edit it to get around the spam filter, but it's not great.

>>72031269
Based BBC providing responses

http://www.bbc.co.uk/news/world-39187496

File: Alan-Partridge-Reasons-07-16x9-1.jpg (145KB, 1140x641px) Image search: [Google]

145KB, 1140x641px

Have you ever tried to have a sensible discussion with someone on the internet? It's impossible. As soon as I started to gently steer the direction of the conversation away from Game of Thrones and towards something good (my career as a sports journalist for example), they told me to go back to Reddïtch! I've never even been to Reddïtch (though I have driven through Worcestershire a number of times).

And they couldn't even type THAT out properly, first of all, they mispelled Reddïtch. AND, instead of just speaking plain English, they used this clever internet speak, they just put G.B.2. GB2 Reddïtch, I had to look it up in my Urban Dictionary...

Look, I agree it's not very nice when you don't have a girlfriend, but it's hardly an appropriate topic to begin a conversation in a place that's supposed to be dedicated to talking about movies!

They ignored me when I said that. But then, someone started going on about God punishing him for masturbating by giving him "that feel" (that's literally how he spelled it - perhaps he was foreign), and I told him how silly his belief in God was. One person pretended to tip his fedora, which must be those people's way of showing support.

So needless to say, I had the last laugh.

*poos*

File: 1481293721006.jpg (170KB, 600x800px) Image search: [Google]

170KB, 600x800px

me and the imaginary gf

I wish I had burgers to eat.

am a bit indifferent to succing the dick

ready to die

lads i like to drink tea but i like to have 4 or 5 cups during the morning and the individual teabags and having to put the kettle on every time to heat water for 1 cup can get a bit tiresome

there must be a better way to do this

please help

>gf
Disgusting.

love succing the dick

did a cum

File: 1488956199428.png (166KB, 400x400px) Image search: [Google]

166KB, 400x400px

SCREECHING

>>72031682
just make a large pot of tea and USE LEAVES, NIGGER. pour the desirable amount whenever the urge hits.

>>72031710
I did two cums.

lmao heseltine sacked

one cum 2 cum 3 cum 4

i did a little cum on ur mummy's bum x

>>72031682
Bigger cup.

all the startups in berlin are pretty poor

i figure people with real talent head for america

>>72031682
Guess what..
[spoiler]teapot[/spoiler]

started up in berlin

had some runt kraut give me a judgemental gaze

looked a bit bent lmao

>>72031787
pmsl the kraut BTFO bet he wont show his face around here again

>edging for over an hour
>finally cum
>cock head comes too fucking senstive
>can feel every pulse of the veins in my cock
>feel the cumming sensation through my cock head
>cock head feels super sensitive as the foreskin slowly rolls over it

wew

doing a walk through berlin

saw some runt aussie doing some shit start up, and this autistic kraut is just stood there staring at him

what a pair of benders lmao

File: 1445346654518.jpg (102KB, 422x408px) Image search: [Google]

102KB, 422x408px

THAILAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAD

>>72031787
*poaches your developers*
*slags you off on the 'dit*
*sees you fail to secure series B funding*

heh
nothing personnel "mate"

>>72031731
>>72031782
can you lads explain further please

like where do the leaves go and what would be a good teapot to get?

did a poo on some runt british lad in berlin that was walking around having a wank to some kraut and aussie lad making out

he didn't even notice my hot stool on his shoulder

Sad!

File: yingluck.jpg (46KB, 294x349px) Image search: [Google]

46KB, 294x349px

>>72031826

just pulled a sickie via text, waiting for a text back

absolutely SHITTING IT lads

>>72031830
I've never used leaves, just buy any teapot and throw in like 3 tea bags and hot water. Bob's your uncle.

had my bent runt employee call in sick via text

will heem him when he comes in next

>>72031858
keep us posted

File: 1410105224855.jpg (19KB, 251x242px) Image search: [Google]

19KB, 251x242px

alri thailad

>>72031873
get off 4chan Colin you fat twat

File: yingluck_shinawatra_ok.jpg (61KB, 620x413px) Image search: [Google]

61KB, 620x413px

>>72031898
alri

I have filtered the Thailand flag and there is nothing he can do about it lmaopmsl

Thailad what do you think of pan european ethnic nationalism? Basically just whites sticking together in our native homeland but no shitskins allowed.

do enjoy quite a lot of sugar in my tea

if that's runty then call me a runt

File: image.jpg (301KB, 1080x1620px) Image search: [Google]

301KB, 1080x1620px

alri

>>72031931
runt

>>72031830
there are ceramic china teapots and ones made of steel. I use a large steel one that I heat on a gas–stove. when the water is just a bit under boiling point, pour in the tealeaves, stir and wait 4 minutes. add water if the tea is too strong.
https://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Teapot

>>72031931
how much sugar are we talking here

File: 1479794596125.png (39KB, 151x200px) Image search: [Google]

39KB, 151x200px

thailadddddd

>>72031922
I think sensible immigration controls based on the merit of the individual and what contribution they can bring with them is a more realistic goal to shoot for. (For anyone outside of the EU)

File: 1468869839675.png (1MB, 923x604px) Image search: [Google]

1MB, 923x604px

>>72030158
love rachel

>>72031972
3 tsp for a mug that holds about a pint