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>want to blow my brains out
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You are currently reading a thread in /int/ - International

Thread replies: 89
Thread images: 40
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>want to blow my brains out
>grandparents are still alive
>can't because I don't want to make them sad
Wow, you're a fucking loser
Just do it
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>would kill myself
>but I believe in reincarnation so it's not worth the risk of being reborn into some starving niglet or a plant somewhere
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>Stared at the abyss
>The abyss stares back
>I wave
>It doesn't wave back
>It was looking at someone behind me
>Awkwardly look at my phone and cry in shame
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>every day I sleep for at least 10 hours, and then just lay there for hours after waking up, staring at the wall and wondering how things got this bad
>haven't seen daylight in weeks because I don't get up until it's already dark
Is it one of those threads ? it's been a while
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>social anxiety has evolved to such an extent that my mind automatically associates the outside world with pain
>my hands shake while holding the spoon while eating with my mother with whom I still live at 23
>there is no stop to this shit, it extends to my whole body - leg muscles tighten from the bare thought of someone looking at me and the way I walk, causing severe pain and a lot of missteps which only amplify it
>pulse is constantly over 90 bpm, even at rest. The only case where it drops down below 85 is when there's no human being around me
>no job, no friends, never a gf, handless kissless, no driver's license, no future
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>think about an heroing every day but I'll never have the balls
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>can't even have a simple 10-second conversation with a cashier anymore without wanting to punch myself and wondering what I did wrong
>stay up for 30-36 hours at a time because falling asleep when I'm really tired gives me vivid dreams
>this is my only pleasure, aside from drinking
yeah, once a night just isn't enough
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>21 years
>no friends
>no job
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>18 years
>LITERALLY spending the best years of my life on a laotian pottery forum
>10-second conversation with a cashier
who the fug talks with the cashier. you just say "thank you" after you have bought your things and that's it.
>the best years of my life

That's basically a meme tho,these are the shittiest years,the best years are childhood or when you're old
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>I spent most of my life playing video games alone in the dark
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>My family is all dead or don't talk to my mom
>she only has myself, a 22yo retard and uni dropout
based finnish autism
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>haven't been outside my home in 2016
>spend 22-23 hours in my bed every day
>haven't talked to a human being in two weeks
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>>stay up for 30-36 hours at a time because falling asleep when I'm really tired gives me vivid dreams
I'm not alone as it seems.
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I just don't get small-talk. It's unnecessary, you don't know them.
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>can't make eye contact with anyone
>often forget my point while expressing something to people
>having conversations is such a rare thing that when someone talks to me my voice doesn't come out
>plan phone conversations in paper hours before making them and then fuck it up anyway, and feel like shit the rest of the week
lmao just do it nerd
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>haven't had a job in nearly a year
>no friends at all
>DWP work coach was a bit nice to me and now I have a massive crush on her and can't stop fantasising about her
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>family always call me a faggot loser virgin
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this thread
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I'm half-spanish myself and i know how fucking annoyingly social you guys are usually. You should go to talk with someone :^)
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>want to leave this country and go live as a noone in New Zealand or become a shitty underpaid stand-up comedian
>instead I'm studying in college for something I'm mentally not suited for to please my parents
4chan isn't your family you autistic retard
What attracts so many pathetic failures to this website?
I want /r9k/ to go away.
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>"it gets better"
>it doesn't
This just makes it worst for autistic people though.
I definitely understand why you want to leave the country kek
Humans in this century spend all their day on the internet, whatever the culture, race, social class or country.
Social humans go to Facebook 24/7, those of us who aren't social spend it here.
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>implying I'd want to be family with a leaf
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you can't stay reclusive forever
to all the people who suffer from social anxiety
you guys should seek help
counseling can help you
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>it's 2:08am on a Monday morning
>i'm reading an article about "the evolution of the anime nose"

Does anybody else ever just have those moments where they wonder where everything went so wrong?
ur mum
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I was just wondering that if this kind of crippling social anxiety is something caused by the internet age. Shame I didn't go to school for psychology so I could get a research grant and get paid to browse 4chan finding an answer.
If not Internet I'd be a normal human being.
ofcause. Internet is better than real realiy. If we hadn't Internet = we'd have to socialize.

what's the link for that article? sounds interesting
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>I'm a no one in New Zealand
>I hate myself
Who here /stupid/? I'm so dumb like holy shit I'm a retard.
It's not really that interesting. The articles on the website are quite short though, which is good if you're a NEET who can't hold his attention on anything.

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No brain
Yes exactly thank you. My stipules are withering too.
That's a good point
so can valium

or booze

or cocaine
its annoying when customers small talk with cashier when we have to deal with next customers
that's still pretty cool, just gave me another reason to like lgoh more than other anime
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>live a mediocre life
>not happy with it but not unhappy either
if my life was an ice cream flavor it would literally be vanilla
Don't lie to yourself, m8 ;^)
ITT: We make no changes to our worthless lives while still complaining about them, myself included.

>tfw no gf
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>I've never been to a party
>I've never had sex
>I've never even made good grades
Not gonna lie; being told "it gets better is bullshit" was some of the most helpful news I'd ever been told.
Probably, I'd be the same.
have you ever tried astral projection?
I don't really have the will for that. I can't even manage lucid dreaming (although I sometimes get sleep paralysis).
Literally me lmao
you are one step from getting astral-projected anyways. it'll come to you even if you don't want it.

"Thank you"? Why would you ever say more than "hi" to a cashier?
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>it'll come to you even if you don't want it.
Guys, just be yourselves ;)
I'd rather these people didn't.
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Is /int/ usually this pathetic?

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You guys should enjoy the neet life desu
>be me 2 years ago
>complete neet
>for some really strange reason I somehow get a 7/10 girl to hang out with me
>we do
>one week later we fug
>no condoms, she is not on birth control
>be so horny that Idgaf, fuck her really hard
>pull out before I cum
>2 days later, happy as fuck, finally lost the V-card
>Suddenly it hits me
>No condoms
>She isn't on birth control
>what if she is pregnant
>literally spend the entire week in panic, if she is prego my whole life is ruined
>cry like a bitch the entire time
>I just want to return to the neet life
>Completely devasted, get random panic attacks when thinking of her being pregnant
>2 weeks later I ask her to do a prego test
>she does
>Its negative
>cut all ties with her, return to being a neet

Yes I'm a loser, but I wouldn't want to be anything else

What's the big deal? You could've just have her abort it or dehydrate herself to miscarry.
>she says no

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Haha,just woke up from a 15 hour nap lads

Tell her you'll kill yourself if she insists. In the event that she doesn't give in leave a suicide note that you jumped off of a bridge and then move elsewhere.
I was 17 back then and I was still visiting school lad, running away was no option
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Oh of course, what a reasonable and realistic solution, how did I miss it.
why shitskins are taking over: the thread
>I lock my self in my room and do drugs all night
>I haven't seen sunlight in weeks
>the only pleasure I get is from hallucinations
>I've done a plethora of drugs but never alcohol

Or you could introduce her to antinatalism by explaining that it's incredibly selfish to force a person into a world of pain and suffering.
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>go to an IOP group for people with crippling mental illness
>still the most autistic one there
>Graduated college when i wanted to drop out the entire time purely because I knew my family would be depressed if I dropped out like everyone else
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>24 year old Virgin in 2 hours
But I want to kill myself too meight
>Live with Parents
>They ignore 50% of everything I say to them
>Developing a stutter because of the constant humiliation
>Don't confront them about it because I'm such a burden to them
>Too scared to buy drugs is the only thing that saved me from becoming an addict
post more goldface elements, i lost my folder
Thread replies: 89
Thread images: 40
Thread DB ID: 449940

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