When I was 17 I was on holiday and chatting to a decent looking middle aged guy on grindr we swap pics and agree to meet along a lane not far from the caravan site im staying at, i stand there for half an hour and he pulls up in a van with another guy i didnt agree to meet they throw me in the back and then I wake up behind the hedge they grabbed me at, drowsy as fuck and pretty banged up, i remember bits and pieces like being pissed on, more than just two guys voices and having what i now presume to be a poppers mask put on me, I tell my parents I got mugged on the way to the corner shop
>>1293979 I had a stalker when i was 16 and on grindr and he found me through facebook and ended up raping me for almost a week straight he gets out of prison at the end of february and he sent me a letter before christmas that i cant open grindr is wildddddd, be safe
rape is terrifying.. i was about to fuck a guy and he kept saying shit about how hes going to fuck me because i fucked him and i kept saying no and that we wont even fuck if thats how hes going to be. he just said kept saying how he was going to fuck me, i was terrified and nearly wanted to jump out the motel window naked (the door was very hard to open, it took like five minutes of jiggling the lock to open).. he eventually understood but he was way bigger than me and could have if he wanted to.. please be careful with hooking up..
I was sexually abused by my older brother between the ages of 8-13. He would play mind games with me. Black mail me. Make me do all sorts of stupid stuff. I'm 20 now. Still very mentally scarred. I just had a dream this morning that I was beating him up until he could hardly breathe =/. I think I have ptsd. Not diagnosed tho because I don't get counciling or therapy or whatever cus the only person Ive ever told was my best friend. And a lot of people think i'm the asshole because I never talk to him or want to see him at family gatherings =(
I kind of got raped once when I met a guy from online in real life when I was around 15. He had blonde hair and brown eyes and was really cute and we met up in a shopping mall. After spending like 40 minutes in the mall we went to his apartment and watched some saw movies and in the middle of the second movie he started touching me and i just told him to stop and tried to get his hands off me but he just didn't care and kept touching me and then he started kissing me and i punched him in the face. I remember how he got really mad and i started crying and he pulled his pants down and forced me to suck it. After he came he allowed me to leave and never contacted me again.
>>1297884 It's not just a dick when your that young. It's your trust for people. It's the feeling of being used. And when your that young your brain is still painting what the world is and how you see it and live in it.
>around 6th grade >best friend has a big brother few years older than us >be curious >find friends brothers underwear >play around with them a bit >get caught by said brother >guilt trips me all over this >be so ashamed of friend finding out >promises not to tell >later >get left alone for few hours with friends brother >reminds me of the underwear incident >tells me to come closer >forces me to check out the underwear he's wearing at that moment >makes me undress his pants >presses my head against his bulge >keeps rubbing till he gets a boner >I'm so full of shame and shock that I can't really do anything >ends up skull fucking me for good 5 minutes which feel like forever >rips my pants off >rubs his cock against my hole >tries to get it in >hurts hurts hurts >young and foolish, no lube >gets it back in my mouth >fucks my throat with me on my back, holding my hands >cums fast >avoid friends place from that day on >still jerk off to these memories and ashamed of it
i was raped by three different men in 3 different occasions. i think the time that fucked me up the most was getting raped by a guy i actually loved/ was attracted to. i was 15 he was 16 but in my grade because hes a fuck up. we were in his room in pjs when he started trying to wrestle me. i kept telling him to fuck off. i wasnt one to wrestle or compete with other guys. i stayed stiff and annoyed and he eventually stop. he put on a movie on his laptop and we laid on the ground watching it. he starts teasing me saying shit like "you dont want to fight because you'll lose". its true but fuk off. i dont remember much after this point but i remember him laying on top of me and putting me in a hold with both arms. i remember him saying i dont have a choice and thinking it has something to do with wrestling. and then being shocked with he pulled down my pants. I dont remember the actual fucking but im pretty sure he might've recorded it on his laptop.
i was so fucked up in the head at the point i was in a daze all the time.
i remember another time he did something to me in his brother's bed because he didn't want to do it in his bed. I think he used tools or something because it hurt a lot. He told me to lay under the blankets and my head under a pillow. i listened. I couldn't breathe and he said that he choose when i breath and that this was all about him.
It's so fucked up because now being raped is my fetish. I feel disgusted with myself but i need to get fucked like that. I'm attracted to men that treatment me like shit and only really jerk off to hardcore porn. I wish i could move on but its hard. Most of the time I dont even want to fuck, i just want a guy to hug me and make me feel safe, but the fucked up part of me leads me to fucking guys that abuse me.
i know some of you guys are fucked up and want to know what we both look like. I was an awkward skinny mixed kid and he was a bulkier indian guy.
>>1298079 I was like 12 or 13, and I'm guessing he had just turned 16 or something? I remember him being on the last grade of public school (grades 1 to 9 here). His younger brother was totally blond, but he had dark brown hair - different dad and so on. He used to wear those stupid ass baggy jeans and caps that were really "fashionable". Also smoked and all that so pretty much white trash teenager.
>be 20 in a long term relationship with a 26 year old >he's really attractive, like I feel so lucky for landing with such a hot guy >a few days ago find out he's into scat because of the cache in our computer >I bring it up casually and he just smirks >our normal routine is I take a shower (I douche), we have sex then go to bed and he showers in the morning. >this time he starts foreplay before I get to the shower >I ask him to stop so I can take a shower and douche >he doesn't stop >fine, he doesn't mind my shit on his dick, don't have to douche anymore >he starts fucking me really deep >he whispers in my ear, "if you get my dick dirty you're gonna clean it with your mouth" >I'm nervous but that's where I draw the line >comes out clean and we go to bed Ever since I found out he's into... all that, he started to do a bunch of nasty stuff. >he's peed on me while we take a shower >peed inside of me while we were fucking in the shower >he spit in my food and only told me after I ate it >invited a guy over (probably off grindr) who kept making really sexual remarks to me in front of him, saying how my ass looks tight (even though I was wearing pants) and how he wants to fuck me I honestly don't know what to do anymore, I feel like I'm reaching my limit.
>>1298759 >>1298787 I mean I also have some stuff I'm into that he isn't into and it works fine for us, and it hasn't gotten violent or anything, maybe he's just testing the waters? I will talk to him about my limits.
And we recently moved in together after like 6 months of dating and besides that everything's going great for the most part.
Sorry I've never posted before so don't know how to properly do this.
Basically I still don't know whether I was raped. I met a guy on a fetish site for sub/dom. I was a sub so was into being dominated. Basically just met him at a hotel and he offered me some drinks and we got to it. I started blowing him he was rough and it was hot. He told me to put on stockings and a g string which was another turn on.
But then I kept drinking to the point where I was getting woozy and basically fell asleep. I woke up with his dick so far down my throat I actually vomited. I stumbled to the bathroom and cleaned up and then fell back into bed and basically passed out.
Then it's all pretty hazy, I woke up twice to him fucking me which I told him no loudly but he didn't even slow down and put his hand over my mouth. He'd only cum if I told him I loved him.
Tl;dr - I think I was raped but I guess it could've just been shitty roleplay that I didn't really sign up for.
>>1293969 I was never raped, but I probably would have been repeatedly had I been a smaller guy.
Basically, I was manipulated and sexually harassed all four years of high school by one of my closest friends. It started simply because I once admitted attraction to him, and then it just spiraled. He would rub his hand on my crotch or leg in public and I would slap it away. In private he'd pin me to ground and shove his dick in my face but I always through him off. I was honestly afraid to be alone with him, but he'd even do this if other people left the room for five minutes. Sometimes it the violence was more than sexual; he'd hit me out of nowhere or choke me and act like we were just duded horsing around.
Meanwhile as this shit is going on he's manipulating me as well. He made me feel as though wasn't doing any wrong because I was attracted to him, which I was, but didn't want any of that. Then he'd make me feel like I was horrible person because of how shitty his life was.
It didn't end until he started masturbating in front of me AND my twin brother. He'd sort of done stuff like that before, but this time we'd had enough and I finally told my brother what had been going on. I completely cut ties from him after we graduated high school; we're both still stuck in our home town and every now and then he tries to talk, but fuck him.
I'm so glad I'm not in that place anymore. If he'd coerce me into sex or even physically overpower me and rape back then I'd probably would have never told anyone, hell he'd probably make me think it was consensual because the relationship was really that bad.
>Don't be me, 23, bottom >Better off being ex, 22, vers >Two years into relationship, ex hasn't been fucked in two years, wants to get fucked >Find cute slim 20yo top on Grindr >Ex recognises cute top >Ex was fucked by cute top when ex was 17, cute top 15 >Cute top apparently hung for his age at the time >Ex excited at thought of getting fucked again
>Two days later cute top comes over >Me and ex go to bathroom to clean >Enter bedroom, top is sitting on bed in jeans >Calls ex to sit next to him, asks me to show him how I blow ex >Get to work on ex >Cute top grabs me by hair, pulls me over, rubs my head in his crotch >Cute top starts to get hard >Oh my >Oh wow >This is getting big >Takes jeans off >FUUUUUUCCCCCCKKKKKKK >Cute top went commando >9+ inches, index finger + thumb don't touch when grabbing it >Ex gasps >Cute top looks to ex: 'Yup. I've grown' >Ex looks to me: 'Looks like I'm playing top tonight. You'll have to bottom for the both of us' >Look to ex: 'that's gonna hurt. No DP tho, ok?' >Ex grins: 'we'll see about that ...'
>Take turns blowing them >Blow both at the same time >Things get rough >Can deepthroat ex, but not cute top >Ex forces my head down >Start to cough and gag >Ex and cute top laugh >Get spitroasted, ex in ass, cute top in mouth >Try to switch positions >Object; ex went in bare, don't do ass to mouth >Ex does it anyway and holds head down again >Cute top slides in >Hurts but not too much >Goes deeper >Hurts more, but still not too much >Goes deeper still >Yelp, pull away, can't say no due to cock in mouth >Cute top pulls out, tells ex to take cock out >Cute top ploughs straight back in, balls deep >Scream >Ex holds me down >Cute top goes to town on my ass >Still screaming, yelling to stop, waving arms >Ex climbs on me, pins me down with ass, leans over side of bed, grabs cuffs and gag >Hands cuffed behind back, gag strapped in mouth >Oh shit
From that point on, they pretty much used my ass like a fleshlight. One would hold me in position while the other one fucked me. To be honest, I got used to cute top's cock after a while. The problem was when they double penetrated me.
My ex used bondage tape to tie my lower and upper legs together like you see in pup play pics and videos. They positioned me on cute top's cock and I couldn't kneel up to get off it. Then my ex slipped his in too, grabbed me around the neck and they both went at it, no matter how much I tried to shake them off. I remember cute top saying at one point 'there are acutally fucking tears rolling down his face. He's actually crying!' My ex replied that it was making him harder and asked if I was crying enogh for him to use it as lube.
Once they'd came, they left me still tied up in the bed and went into the living room to play some 360. Cute top came in a little later and fucked my ass again. Then he left and ex came in and did the same. This continued for a few hours with them DPing me three more times during the night. Cute top left in the early hours of the morning and ex went to sleep with me still tied up and gagged. Woke up a few hours later and dragged me to the bathroom to piss and shit, before cleaning my ass out. Tied me up, but this time put the cuffs round a bed frame so I couldn't move and went to work. Came back from work about 10 hours later, fucked me and finally let me out. Then acted like it was all great and nothing bad had happened.
I've had it happen a few times but with way less intensity. Straight dudes, especially younger guys, seem to think it's okay to make sexual remarks / act sexually towards gay guys just because they're gay. Pretty sure it's some kind of thinking along the lines of "they're gay so they probably like it"
My boyfriend has always been aggressive but when he gets really into it he won't stop when he's clearly hurting me. I told him several times to use more lube or to try to not take breaks because it will hurt more if my hole relaxes, you know what I mean? But he proceeds to not use enough lube and take it out for a minute then slam it back in. What freaks me out a bit is that he's really quiet when we fuck, when I'm moaning out of pain or I try to push him back he just stares at me with a grin on his face.
I would not call this rape because I've never actually told him to stop, but I certainly don't enjoy it that much.
>be in juvy because I was a punk-ass kid at 15 >small but thought I was tough >third day in and two older kids (about 17) start hanging around with me >seem nice. figure may as well have friends while I'm in there >sneak off to places and smoke. never get caught >after dinner one night they say they're going for a smoke and I should go with them >end up in maintenance garage >bigger kids says to me "we want a blow job from you" >tell them that isn't going to hap... >I see stars as the other one sucker punches me >I go down to the floor and they jump on me >one holds my arms down and the bigger kid gets on my jest and takes his cock out >tells me if he feels teeth he'll kill me >I won't open my mouth despite being slapped around >bigger kid says "fuck this", gets off and starts opening my pants >pull them down and flips me over >other kid asks what he's doing but he doesn't answer >he grabs a dirty shop towel and stuffs it in my mouth >spits in his hand, rubs it on his cock and pushes it into my ass >hurts like hell >he starts fucking me hard, like either it's punishment or he's running out of time >takes about a minute before he blows his load in my ass >gets off me and I'm just laying there >other kid pulls his pants down and tries to fuck me >has a hard time getting in and when he does he fucks me for about 5 minutes >bigger kid tell him they have to go so he pulls out and pulls his pants up >bigger kid tells me if I tell anyone they will knife me >just lay on floor for a while. ass sore, head still spinning >guard walks in. asks who did it to me >tell him nothing >he asks if it was consensual. I say yes >few days later end up blowing guard
>sum isnt relly rape cuz boys get stupid >wen i was 22 >horny >on grindr and crusing >sum guy wanted 2 hookup he had pie face >agreed to meet his place in warington >took the trane and walk to his flat >short guy but ok looking >cold as fuck outside and no hat or gluvs >he didnt want to let me in cuz stupid scardy poofter >convince him 2 open door >he got me beers after a while >finally got him 2 bed after a while >didnt want 2 suck me cuz 2 big >he kind scarred >rubbn myself on him >was afrade i would fuk him insides >told him no just rub it betwen his but >kept poking it around his hole >finally start to put it inside >said he didnt want me 2 but i did >held him down on bed >kept saying no but told him i was aready haf way u know >slow fuk >he didnt try to stop me just kept wispering no >fuk him long time and cum and lay on top of him i like his booble but >go pis and take shower >he still in bed so fuk him agin >ask if i can stay overnite >he said no and cry 2 much >have to take late train home >cold as fuk >he blocked me >use diferent name >tricked my way back in 2 months later >fuk him again >got to fuk all nite like i want rely good >he all upset next day >he say i rape him but he didnt try to stop me and just say no over and over with his arm over his face >sum boys dont know what they want >he was skinny and have small dik >what else was i sposed to do >another boy in the woods say no 2 but he was hard and thats how i now he want it >dont like boys who act all yes but say no >they shuld not go on grinndr and make a guy horny rite >may be all poofters want it and just pretend no cuz fantusy >live with older guy now and he want it all time so good for me
I was in boy scouts and at like 14 years old we went upstate to a camping trip in some cabin. The troop leader was like 17 and super cute greek guy. Taught me what masterbaiting was, and talked a lot about sex.
Anyway we were like 3 days into the week long trip and we get put on fire duty together. He kept talking about missing having sex with his girlfriend and how jerking off behind one of the trees isn't the same... I could green text this but I'm just gonna say it.
He eventually started calling me gay and making me do stuff for him. He told me anytime he referred to me as "Maria" then it was time for me to "not fight back".. First it was some hand jobs. That later lead to head, which I threw up every time cause he didn't understand 14 year old throats I guess. I licked his ass sometimes too, which wasn't that great because there were no showers up there. He fucked me twice. The first time I cried so he stopped, kicked me in the stomach and then told me to get to camp when I stopped being a little bitch. The second time he stuffed one of his sock in my mouth and just went to town. I think he only kept doing these things cause I always had a raging boner while he did it and I followed him around like a puppy lmfao
1. I was making out with a guy recently right next to someone's door in an apartment. Then I blew him and I had a condom sitting on a bush and he said he wanted to fuck beforehand. He then changed his mind and I was like "okay" when it's time to get off I ask him to turn around so I can play with his ass while i jerk and he keeps saying "are you going to fuck me, please don't.." and he was really nervous, he just did not trust me, we were outside in broad daylight too like I have no intention of raping you.
2. This ones a long story but basically I got really high with this guy and I was like "Okay I'm gonna go I'm blazed outta my mind" and he was like "Nah I'm coming in" which I don't know him terribly well but I felt too beta to decline, so we go in my apartment and we talk about fast food restaurants for like 10 minutes and then he's like "Let me try that mouth" and I was saying "No, it's okay, you should leave" and I don't want to give all the details but I ended up having sex with him only half-consensually, I didn't feel like I had a choice. He's fucking me for what feels like an eternity and this may be gross but I kept farting because he was fucking me so hard he was trapping air in my ass and he liked it and was like getting off on it. Anyways, he didn't use a condom, he came inside me, and I'm really scared about getting tested because I don't want to know just yet so I just stopped having sex altogether. Also he made me suck him off after he already came and had stuck his dick in my ass and the way he positioned it was so that I couldn't really push him off and I nearly through up but mostly it was just dry heaving and not being able to see shit because I had tears in my eyes. He visits my profile on the app daily but I'm scared to block him because he now knows where I live. Also don't ever agree to just "smoke and chill"
>>1301565 that's sad man, you should definitely report that. I was in the same position as you were ages ago and I didn't want to report it because of the shame and just general fuckery but I realised that he would continue to do that shit to others. Like saying nothing just keeps him going. It fucked me up to realise that he would continue to hurt people like he did me
Thanks, i kind of needed to hear that. when I wrote it down (for the first time obviously for this thread) it kind of made me feel like I was being over emotional and that it was obviously the way the night was going to progress as soon as I put myself in that situation. but yeah, the morning after was the lowest I have ever felt and I have to keep reminding myself because I am afraid I will make the same mistake.
>be me >19 >put up CL add to suck dick >Mexican guy replies with pic >pretty good/10 >he's 40, 6'4" 180lbs >it's gotta be like, 7in >I go to his apartment >doesn't speak much English >start sucking him on the couch while he's watching Troy >he doesn't seem that into it >moves my head off if him, and gets up >nods for me to follow >we go into his bedroom >I'm sucking him again, he's pushing my head down, moaning >asks to fuck me >he doesn't have condoms >tell him I'll bring condoms next time >asks to fuck me again >no >let me fuck you >no >can I eat your ass? >sure, I guess >I get on all 4s with him behind me >he goes to town, eating my ass >I see where this is going, but I love sub play so I go with it >he asks to fuck me again >no >starts poking dick at my hole >stop >not going to do it >OK >starts pushing it inside of me, and grabs my mouth >fucks me for about 30 sec, cums in my ass
I honestly wish he would've lasted longer. It was technically non-consentual, since I didn't give him consent, but if I didn't want it, I could have fucked his day up. That was a few years back, and I've been neg since, thankfully. I still rub one out thinking about it every so often.
>>1293969 my story, all my friends claim it's rape but for some reason I don't, you decide.
>met a guy online, chat for a month until we decided to hook up >first date, not really that interested in sex but I prep my ass, I don't like nasty surprises. >We go to a pub, big crowd having a birthday party so we decide to go to my place since I'm close by >Buy beer on the way home >We drink and talk, casual >After an hour I pass out, didn't even see it coming >Wake up, he is pounding me like mad >A minute into it I start getting hot and hard, start moaning >He doesn't stop >I start liking and kissing his fist that was gripping the sheets next to my head >He grunts and finishes inside. >Like a slut I say "thanks I needed that." >Quietly he dresses up and leaves, not even a "bye" >I message him a couple of times, no reply.
>>1301760 It's rape since no consent was given before he started fucking you. That happened to me too. I woke up in the middle of it and enjoyed it but the guy asked me if I could pretend that I didn't like it. He got off on the rape thing. He asked me what positions I was uncomfortable in and got mad when I was getting hard or touching my cock. I cried and screamed a lot. Some of my screams were real because it really did hurt. I never messaged him back after because he was really weird. He asked my body statistics so he could give me the maximum dosage for sleeping pills so I wouldn't wake up during sex but not enough to kill me.
>>1300310 thanks. i like a hot fictional story like that that's focused on arousing the reader rather than reading about the emotional baggage of a victim of real sexual abuse. hot stories with little emotional content > reality.
>>1302210 We only met one time but he he fucked me 4 times that night. It would have been more but I made a show of calling an uber to have an excuse to get out of there. He wanted to do more things like tying me up and using more drugs(I'm pretty sure he had molly and ecstasy). Thank god for uber. He messaged me after that he wanted to meet again but I never replied.
>>1302240 If I find you, I'm going to rape you then upload pictures of you. Then I'm going to make you suck my dick and upload it to xtube. I'll save more videos and pictures of me fucking you then I'll use it to blackmail you so you have no choice but to be my bitch. When your life is ruined and you can't show your face in the town you've grew up in anymore then you have the right to ask me to go to therapy.
Fuck, what are straight women doing here? The myth that rape is about power was created by feminists so that the plain majority of women would feel common cause with the pretty minority. Rape is about sex.
>be 14 >in scouts >other guys know/suspect I'm gay >be alone in woods with 3 other boys >they tie my hands around a tree as part of a "game" >don't suspect anything till I see their sly smiles >suddenly be gagged with neckerchief >one of them (a short but muscular boy with wavy blond hair) says "I'll go first" >he pulls down my trousers and underwear and spits into his hand >struggle against the ties, but to no avail >he uses the spit as lube and fucks me in the ass >calls me the feminine version of my name as he fucks me >when he has shot he grabs my chin and turns my head to face him >he's panting and grinning and shakes his head, like I'M the one who's done something outrageous >goes off to wash his cock in a nearby creek >the second boy - skinny guy with a Roman nose and peach fuzz - takes his place >also shoots in my ass, then washes his cock >finally it's the last guy's turn - a slightly bucktoothed redhead, pale and freckled >he's the "biggest" of the 3 >start crying as he fucks me, but he continues unfazed >after he has cum they take off my gag and untie me >still teary, yell "you fucking bastards!" at them >they tell me to suck it up and get over it
>be me 5 yo >have full time sitter who's around 16-18 >spend a lot of time with him look up to him like a bro cause no siblings >one day im playing in my room, wwe're home alone >he walks in and suggests we play rp game of restaurant >im down >i rp the server, serve him food etc >he gets really angry saying the food was shit >im confused >rips my clothes off me, im sttanding butt naked and confused af in front of him >he says im going to pay for messing up >makes me feel his crotch >he's diamonds, pulls out his thick, veiny uncut cock >rubs it on my face while he pins me down >can't even move >he forces my mouth open and fucks my face while fondling with my tiny genitals >cums down my throat after ages of thrusting >im struggling to breathe, coughing >he gets up tells me to clean up and not tell anyone about this >too scared to not listen >was his cumslave for 4 years >he gets fired for something else, repress all memories, attracted to girls >be 20 get messed up flashbacks and arousals cause no other sexual experience in life >get messed up fetish to relive experiences >still not attracted to men just attracted to domination >mfw
>>1302219 hey man, my step-dad tortured me for about 7 years and therapy's helped me cope with it. am i okay? fuck no. but i'm better than i was a year ago. if therapy's available to you, give it a shot.
also, sidenote, this thread's a fucking downer, i came here to jerk off.
We had a strange relationship. Part of me thinks it was an abusive one, though another part of me thinks I was complicit in it. I dunno. It's hard to think back to it.
And, while I could have gone to the police, and the thought did cross my mind multiple times while I was tied up during the day, with him acting like it never happened, it was easier for me to pretend it didn't happen. Even though I know and knew it did happen. It was years before I felt comfortable getting intimate with people again after I split up.
There was also the issue that I spending my time between two countries at the time. Until I was due to start university about six months later, his flat was my only place to stay. If I had called the police, I'd have had nowhere to stay and would have had to leave the country.
>>1302839 It's not just my emotional shit that makes me angry. I'm this >>1302467 anon because that what my brother did to me. I can't go back home because his friends laugh or look at me weird. They know what my brother did to me and a few of them even tried to do shit with me last I saw them. Therapy can't fix that. And yeah, this thread is a downer.
>be me, 18yo, last year of highschool >my deskmate is a really actractive guy, fit body, a beard that made him look a lot older >he could have been one of the most popular kids around but he was really reserved, kinda mysterious, never saw him with a girl even if many sighed after him >from my closet i can't stop thinking about his cock >he always sat with open legs, often our legs touched >always pretended not to notice, apparently he didn't as well >after a few weeks I start actively try to touch his legs, for all I knew he could very well be a fellow faggots, there were some signs >one day i'm in the bathroom >he comes in >I touch him as he passes by "by mistake" >"you truly are a slut then, anon" >"what?" >he puts his hands around my neck, doesn't choke me but puts me at the wall >rock hard, i notice he is as well >"do you want me to tell everyone you're a slut, anon" >"please don't" >"well, so you have to be a good slut" >still rock hard, but scared he could hit me or tell everyone i'm a fag >he wants me to suck him there but i beg him not, if he wants it he can come my place later (i lived a few blocks from the school) >he actually follows me home >parents are at work luckily >we get inside >he immediately orders me to get naked and get him something to drink >when i come back he's without pants on my sofa, with open legs and a glorious hard cock >"suck on it, bitch" >he forces my head down, makes me gag >i nearly puke and hit him with my teeth, but after 2-3 minutes he still cums >makes me swallow it >proceeds to take pictures of my mouth dripping with his cock juice >"you don't want your parents to find me here, right?" >"holy shit no" >"get on all fours" >at this point i'm legitimately scared, time's running out and i never really wanted anal, at least not so of a sudden >i beg him not to do it, tell him i'm not even clean
>>1302980 >"who the fuck cares, anon" >luckily he pulls a condom out of nowhere and wears it >he tries to penetrate >i'm really tight, and it's painful as fuck >i'm crying on the pillow regretting everything, too scared to scream or defend myself >he takes a good ten minutes to pound me slowly and cum inside his condom >he takes it out, full of blood and even some shit >"you're lucky i'm not making you eat it, slut" >goes away >next day he's a bit less aggressive, he told me i was good and that he didn't want to scare me >he still proceeds to make me his slut for the next two months >he gets less and less abusive but still dominant, and i start enjoying it a lot >suddenly he stops with the booty calls >ask him why at school >he got a girlfriend >never did anything with him anymore >always heared his girl telling her friends how sweet he was >chuckled all the times
>>1301565 Good for you, HIV doesn't cause AIDS in case you get it or have it. AZT, amyl nitrates and other drugs cause the immunosuppresion. So DON'T take their drugs. https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=zqjI-YiNliQ
>>1302975 therapy can't fix your hometown problems, but if you've got other issues (like holding onto old rage that affects your current life maybe? or maybe just feeling guilty that's my problem) therapy can help you figure out shit like coping mechanisms
my situation means that i can't talk to my mom without thinking about her husband fucking me, or thinking about the possibility that she might have known about it at the time and just did... nothing. sometimes relationships and activities are just destroyed for the rest of your life after shit like this happens. but it doesn't mean you have to be destroyed too, you know?
if therapy is at all convenient for you, take it man. like i said earlier, just give it a shot. even if it's just one visit.
By spreading this misinformation, you are putting lives at risk. HIV+ people who believe your bullshit will become sicker and eventually die if they forego medical treatment, not to mention how many people they will spread the virus to.
>stepdad found my gay porn when I was 14 >used that as an excuse/reason/blackmail to start molesting me >though it was definitely fucked up, I don't consider any of this "rape", since he never forced me into anything with violence >instead he was good at manipulating me with guilt/shame and my own pent-up teenage libido to get my consent >even managed to groom me into believing that I was the one somehow "seducing" him >though of course, I had no real control over the situation, he was basically using me as his personal on-demand cumdump >the sex was often rough and degrading... but sometimes it was really good, and he usually made sure I got off too >sometimes I even initiated things with him, further compounding my guilt >this settled into a stable pattern for several years >I didn't realize just how fucked up and unhealthy the situation was until college, when I started dating and getting into real, normal relationships >once I finally started showing more independence, and especially once he found out I was fooling around with other guys, we got into this worsening cycle of angry fighting followed by "make-up sex" >this eventually led to the only time he ever outright raped me >shortly after a nasty fight, he tried pressuring me into another bout of sex, despite me still being pissed >so unlike all the previous times where I tried to turn him down only to have him goad me into it, I didn't give into any of his usual arsenal of guilt and psychological tricks >so he finally lost it, ended up holding me down and fucking me, then forced me to cum before he let me off his dick >which honestly wasn't that unusual, except it was the first time where he hadn't first gotten me to either explicitly or implicitly consent to it >he seemed to feel super guilty afterwards, repeatedly apologized for "going overboard" >but I was fucking done, moved out shortly after >haven't done anything sexual with him since >but I still have guilty, self-loathing fantasies about him
>>1303626 Well yeah, that's why I posted it here. I realize I went into more detail than I intended. Feels good to get it off my chest, since I don't have anyone IRL I can talk to about it.
>>1303640 I moved out a little over three years ago. I went low-contact for about a year before I finally started talking to him again.
Our relationship since then has been... awkward and complicated. I thought things were improving, we'd had some serious talks where he expressed lots of regret and apology--mainly for the rape, but it also seemed like he was starting to understand my problems with all the earlier stuff I'd "consented" to. It looked like we were making progress towards having a more-or-less normal relationship, and I'd even started calling him "dad' again.
But then when I was visiting for the holidays last fall, he got drunk and made a move on me again. He backed off and apologized as soon as I refused (not that he should win any awards for that, but at least he took no for an answer instead of trying to goad me into it), but of course I was pissed that he'd even tried anything. And I was pissed with myself because I almost let it happen anyway. So now things are back to being weird between us.
>>1303649 Maybe this sounds like stockholm syndrome or something, but I don't hate the guy, and honestly our relationship was "mostly" positive, despite all the guilt and quasi-abusive sexual shit. I don't think he "meant" to hurt me, we were just in a very unhealthy sexual dynamic that kept getting worse until it finally went too far.
>>1303668 >Maybe this sounds like stockholm syndrome or something here we go >but I don't hate the guy, and honestly our relationship was "mostly" positive That sounds very apologetic and honestly not convincing at all. >despite all the guilt and quasi-abusive sexual shit How could you even consider that relation positive in any sense? Nice things don't compensate shit things. >I don't think he "meant" to hurt me, we were just in a very unhealthy sexual dynamic that kept getting worse until it finally went too far. You idiot. He used you, he abused you, and now he's trying to save himself by making up to it, and once he's drunk he's back to his old ways. He hasn't changed and you'd be a fool if you didn't get rid of him this instant.
It OK I got a part time job with family friend from 5AM until 2PM so have lots of time to goof off afterwards.
I go hiking down by the Red River near St Boniface hospital
I was a well known gay cruising outdoor sex hangout in the 80's, probably still is for all I know
I watch one guy blow another by the river, hidden in the bushes nearby and get a massive boner
Some guy surprises me and sees what Im watching , too embarrassed to move and we both watch him suck the other guy off until he blows He reaches for my belt and I let him undo it and he touches me until I'm so excited, I say yes when he asks for a blowjob
He's pretty hard when I fish him out and much bigger than the two Ive sucked before so I get on my knees and start.
Im not too good at this but I have little gag reflex so I can deep throat him quite easily. He asks for me to finger his ass and being really horny do it.
He comes really qucikly and just grabs my head and throat rapes me until he finished coming and I swallowed all of it
>>1304290 Im a bit tighter in this position so he uses his weight to get inside me deeper. pinning my arms over my head while he does this
I finally get enough prostate stimulation and come and he keeps going until he does again himself inside me
He lays on top panting and holding me down while he keeps grinding against me
He gets off me and pulls the sheet over us and we talk for a while, him about how much he likes "young stuff" and me about a hot make teaching assistant Id like to suck off (I actually did this and more for 20 months after I went back home)
I talk about things and he gets out some porn he has about ropes, bondage, rough sex and other kinky gay sex
I read the ones about guys tied up, masturbating while looking at it.
I agree to come back the next day after he get home from work and we pick up from there, only thing time he wants me tied up so I let him and while he's got me there, asks to take some pictures after covering my face with a towel.
Gradually he starts touching jerking me off while taking these on a self timer, eventually working his way up to sitting on my chest and stuff my face with his cock.
I am sporting a pretty stiff cock too so he rubs it with one hand and holding my head on his dick with the other
I ask to have him fuck me so he ties me to the bed posts for his turn.
We fucked every day I was there and a few times when he came to my city to stay in a hotel
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