Microsoft makes a burger chain

blue waffle of death

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Mystery 'meat' and Secret 'sauce' in brightly labeled packaging.

>>52604147
There are no prices, instead they hand you a EULA and a pen where you fill out some payment information and pick out a which version of the menu you want, they are all basically the same items but for whatever reason they are all missing something vital, the STARTER edition doesn't have buns and you have to bring your own cup to use the soda fountain. The ULTIMATE PRO version is the only one worth having, but is inflated to five times the cost of the lesser versions. The terms place limits on how many burgers you can have, and you're not allowed to share them with anyone else under penalty.

After spending a few minutes trying to figure out their pricing model, you walk outside and find a bunch of hairy russians in a van handing out every menu item for free.

>>52604299
Don't forget that you need a Microsoft account to use the soda machine.

>>52604147
a great meal at a great value.
and vidya games.

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blue cheese sausage framework.

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Better than gentooburgers, it took them two hours to compile my order.

>>52604442
At least the burgers are free, even if they turn into bricks if you eat them in the wrong order.

You head to the university franchise and they give you their entire menu for free.

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>>52604442
>>52604502
Tfw they compile your sauce with the wrong flags and you get mustard instead of ketchup.

The meat is the same cheap shit they've been serving for years, the ingredients are all artificially coloured, flavoured and shaped to look just like real veggies, but in reality, they're made of the same tasteless shit as the meat. The buns are an approximation of quality baked buns, and outwardly, the burger looks really good. In reality, the initial bite is fine, but because of the shit ingredients, it all coalesces into mush by the time you finish eating it. Afterwards you feel a little bit ill, but because you've been eating the same shit burger since childhood, and it's all they were serving in your workplace and at school, you mistake that sick feeling for satisfaction.

One day, you come across a restaurant where people can choose the ingredients to go into the burger. Racks of variations of meat, buns, veggies. A few stalls are in the restaurant where chefs put together those ingredients in a few standard combinations, but those in the know build their own. All the burgers and ingredients are free, and the farmers who grow the ingredients offer their produce for free also, with condition they're credited on any combination their produce is included in.The winfag walks into the Linux restaurant and picks up one of the chef created burgers, and skeptically eats it. The ingredients don't mush the same way the Windows burger does, and at the end, there's no sick feeling of satisfaction. The Winfag declares the Linux burger is shit, the Linux burger fans protest he's tried one combination of ingredients made by one guy, and he should try some varieties before giving up, because in the long run it's better for him anyway. The Winfag tries a few flavours from the chefs, tries once to build his own, but it's just a stack of lettuce on a patty, and so it falls apart. But what he really wants is the artificially coloured, flavoured protein putty, and so he goes back to paying Windows burger.

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The Windows 7 Whopper

>>52604147
>For a limited time only!
>buy any menu and get a free giftcard for 5 songs on your Zune™

>hey i wanted the win7 burger
>don't worry we upgraded your burger to win10 for FREE
>i don't want the win10, I heard it has extra botnet
>but it is FREE!!!!!

>>52604568
A few months later, Windows burger announces a whole new recipe for their burger. They've changed the artificial colours and flavours, but the filling remains the same. The patties are now italian style bread, but with sesame seeds on. The Winfag goes to the Linux restaurant and delightfully proclaims he has a whole new burger for them to try, which tastes much better than the burger he previously adored. The Linux fans curiously try some, but quickly spit tit out, realising it's exactly the same thing as before, with a few superficial changes. The Winfag pulls out his Lumia and takes a selfie, tagging Windows burger in the post. In an instant, Linuxburger is thrown into chaos. The Winfag is confused. This new Burger is free, and all you have to do is take a selfie and tag the company every time you encounter one in the wild. The Linux fans are outraged, given they came to Linux burger to escape the invasive tyrrany of Windows burger.

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>>52604580

>get burger
>no privacy
>it bluescreens

>>52604147
You come in and a waiter immediately asks for your name, age, address, country of residence and blood type. It then puts all your information in a locked up room in some "secure locker", and promises to "never" share your info with anyone, floating quotations included.

You then take a look at the menu.

Two hours later you leave the door, go to your local FreebooterHarbor and get the same burger you wanted for free.

You arrive home and lo and behold your inbox is filled with special exclusive Windows Burger (R) offers

>>52604666
>>52604568
Oh my god a drawfag needs to draw a comic of this

>>52604147
>What's on the menu, /g/?

BASIC

I order the #10 burger and receive it for free, as there is a promotion going on. After eating it, all the staff knows my name and comment on my favorite anime and fap material.

>>52604147
a designated menu with designated burgers on the designated eating street

>>52604678
Now I want one :(

>>52604147
Before eating a Windows burger I'd have to take it apart and removing the tracking chip embedded in the meat.

ITT: poorfags who can't afford to eat at MacBurger

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>>52604880

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>>52604147
>not going to the superior burger chain

As a rational human being who's breath doesn't smell like cum, you've been eating at Winburger since you first heard of them. The burgers haven't changed a whole lot over the years, but they've been improving with every iteration. They even have it down to only two food poisoning deaths a year! The burgers taste great, and there's a shit-ton of condiments and veggies you can pile on your burger, most of them gratis. The only catch is that your burger comes with a. EULA, which places limits on how many extras you get and how many burgers you can have based on what you pay. Every now and then you get a bad burger (with no refund), but they're generally good enough that you don't give a shit.

Then, one day you decide to try GNUburger across the road. At first glance, it looks ten times better than Winburger. The buns, meat, and veggies are all laid out, waiting for you to just grab your shit and make the ultimate burger, completely free. However, there are no condiments whatsoever. The meat is the best thing you've ever tasted, but the buns haven't changed since 1985, the veggies are overly ripe, and the lack of condiments makes it an overall shitty lunch.

Fed up with Winburger's monotony and GNUburger's shortcomings, you decide to try Macburger down the road. Upon entering, you notice that this place is cleaner than most forensic labs. Everything is a bright white color, all metal surfaces are shiny and polished, and you could literally eat off the floor. All the employees look the same. There are only a few items on the menu, with very little difference between them, all ten times more expensive than Winburger but half the burger. You are not allowed to touch any part of your burger but the buns under the threat of being taken to court, and you're not allowed to use third-party condiments that Macburger didn't authorize you to use. If you ask how the burgers are made, you're politely but firmly told to shut the fuck up, because you don't need to know.

>>52604442
>Better than gentooburgers, it took them two hours to compile my order

"I wanted to order a burger, but instead I had to break down the entire process of making a burger from scratch in front of the cashier and when I was done he just pointed to the kitchen and told me to go make it my self. When I got back there all I could see was a cow staring back at me?? I went over to MacBurgers across the street and had my order filled within the minute."

>>52604147
Designated curry masala with extra poo spice

There will be only one, obviously. The OneBurger.

You get a few bing credits with every purchase.

>>52604990
No instead of a cow it's a literal wildebeast (gnu).

>>52604678
Hmm. Too bad there is only one Burger King within 1 km here.

>>52605182
Kek

The building has an arcade and that is all I do when I go there

>>52604678
that's the windows 12 whopper

They give you a menu that covers the whole table, and half of it is ads. You can't tell the waiter what you're getting, you just point at the picture of burgers. The waiter only speaks hindi. He'll tell you your food might take a while, but to speed it up you need to hand him the menu so he can point at what he wants you to buy.

>Head into MicroBurgers
>At till
>Attempt to order quarter pounder meal
>Blank looking cashier turns to other
>Says to the other; ''something happened''
>''something happened'' he agrees.

>>52604147
MS burger needs to download your pickles onto your burger

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>>52605182
>Gentoo
>GNU
But that's wrong.

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>>52604147

>>52605763
Shhhh

>>52604974
underrated post

Meanwhile at Buurgle, they already know your order when you walk in the door because they embedded camera in all the billboards near the restaurants you eat at. The burger is served quickly by a robot and tastes pretty good. You have to bring in your own condiments if you want anything other than ketchup and mustard but most customers don't seem to mind. One time you find the patty is undercooked but there are no employees to complain to.

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>>52604299
>After spending a few minutes trying to figure out their pricing model, you walk outside and find a bunch of hairy russians in a van handing out every menu item for free.
Cap worthy

>>52604147
Steaming piles of shit with a generous side of botnet.

>>52604523
too bad you have to pay 30k to get on campus

Meanwhile, at AMB (Advanced Micro-Burgers) and NBURGIA, the restaurants are kiddie corner from each other. They ban you for a week if you are caught eating at the other chain and take turns accepting Apple dollars. NBURGIA takes Linux dollars but only lets you order a few items off the whole menu. AMB takes Linux dollars for all items off the menu, but half the time they lose your order and refuse to give a refund.

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>>52604442
But you got just what you wanted and no fat

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>>52606235
>Not wanting fat on your burger

>>52606261
But fat is bad for you anon. Don't you want 100% venous access to your system?

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Three years later Apple opens their own fast food franchise and the world insists Apple invented the hamburger.

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I did a quick cap of the thread

>>52604147
Windows 10 Burger. And that's all. Once you ingest it, it releases nanomachines into your body which monitor all your vital functions and record everything you see and hear

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>>52606296
>fat is bad for you

>>52606625
Thanks anon

>>52604410
>a great value
$100

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>this thread

>>52604974
This is a great post and you deserve a pat on the back for it anon

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>>52604147
>Walk into ArchBurgers because you heard there was less useless ingredients on the burgers
>A man angrily stares at you as you order the only thing on the menu -- the edgeburger
>the burger arrives to you as two buns encasing an entirely raw piece of ground beef
>you ask why they didn't cook or prepare anything, only to have the entire restaurant screech in unison
"ITS BLEEDING EDGE MINIMALISM, HARDCORE HAMBURGER EATERS MAKE THEIR OWN BURGERS"
"ENJOY YOUR BLOATED TOPPINGS"
>they reply as you exit the establishment and head over to Debian burgers, where you receive your burger and remove the lettuce and tomatoes.

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>>52607229
>imagine being at computers so fat you look and see food
that works too

>>52606235
holy shit what think pad is that.

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>>52608187

>Order regular burger
"Would you like cheese with that?"
"No thanks"
>get burger
>take a bite, enjoying burger
>employee walks up and asks if I want to upgrade my burger to a cheeseburger
>politley decline, but he insists, and it's free
>assure him that I'm happy without the cheese, but thank him for the offer anyways
>he walks away
>I take another bite
>"the cheese upgrade for your burger is ready sir"

>>52604678
I did not know I had this fetish

>>52604974
10/10

It has tracking microdevices baked into the meat that stay in your body and collect your biometric data and send it to Microsoft to sell

>>52604880
https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=Sn276Zk5B40

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>>52607479
this

> windows burgers
The only menu items are dot NET salads. You have to go to the dodgy alley way down 'third party ave' to get the ingredients you need to make your burger. You're 90% the dude jerked off into your patty as when you bought it he smirked and gave you a funny look. as you walked away you now see billboards everywhere offering you to win big at the casino. by then you're so exhausted by being invested in windows burgers you don't care. The decor is nice and the seats are comfy so you stay.

> debian burgers
you walk in and there's no counter. you walk back out and ask a random passer by what to do and he tells you stand in the middle of the room and say nonsensical words. you do and a minute later your burger comes out. eventually you memorize the words and start learning how to customize your order. you giggle as a new guy comes in and walks out confused.

> ubuntu bugers
everything seems nice until they change their layout and block you from reaching the counter

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A Pillcam hidden in the bun.

>>52604147
a couple shitty first party burgers, and some third party ones, all of which you cannot modify (i hope you like pickles), and can only be eaten in-store, you also can't make them anywhere else

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>HALLO, THANK YOU FOR WALKING INTO THË WINDOWS BURGERS THĮS IS RAKSH□D WHAT DO YOO WANT??

>Hi Rakshad, I'd like-

>NONONO MY NAME EES RAKSH□D
>...
>...sorry? Now then, I'd like a #4 cheeseburger with extra sauce.

>OKÄY YÔUR ORDER WILL BE READY IN FIVE MINUTE. WAIT THERE.

You recieve your cheeseburger only to find out it doesn't have any sauce at all

>Hey Raksh□d, it seems my burger has no sauce at all. Can i get some of that sauce i requested?
> NONONO I CANNOT DO. YOU MUST TALK TO HP.
>but-
>NONONONO. YOU MŮST SPEAK TO SAUCE MANUFÃCTURER.
>But it's a problem on your end!
>OKAY NŐW YOU LEAVE NOW
>Can i speak to your manager?
>I AM THE MANĀGER.

you finish your burger in silence without further protest. It wasn't even supposed to come with HP sauce it was supposed to come with Dell sauce.

>>52604538
>not being in the literal mustard race

>>52606235
>feet
hnnnnnng

>>52609864
>a couple shitty first party burgers,
Some Microsoft burgers that look suspiciously like Apple iBurgers but don't taste the same.

>>52604147
>Windows Burgers
>it's free and tasty, you just have to keep their free webcam with you no matter where you're going
>from time to time you won't get a burger and only explanation you can get is "we're sorry, something happened"

>>52608985
Kek

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>>52604771

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>>52604147
Burger 8.1 > burger 10

gentoo burger:
>it's free but all you got was flour, a head of lettuce, tomatoes and a cow

>>52606625
A few months ago there was a thread like this, but a lot more humerous, does anyone have a screencap?

[ Burger ] [ Edit ] [ View ] [ Windows ] [ Help ]

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>>52604147
No red meat.

>>52604299
very well written <3

>>52606296
>falling for the fat is bad meme

>>52604678
Japanese people want to be Americans so bad they try to out-american america.

>>52606228
Not in the first world

>>52604974
>there's a shit-ton of condiments and veggies you can pile on your burger, most of them gratis
This is false

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>>52604299
This is actually incredible.
Thread should end here

>>52613926
The analo/g/ies thread? I don't have a full cap as the screenshot only rendered half or so but I have capped most stories. Gonna post them when this thread is still up.

>>52604299
What a great post, must be satisfying to Write such a elegant and funny reply.

>>52608209
T60 flashed libreboot

>>52604147
There are 3 menus and each have different prices, the clerks have their own menu with yet another pricing info. Some things on the menu are no longer offered, but no one bothered to update the menus.

>>52614202
mage too large (image: 28267x1907px, max: 10000x10000px)
here's an archive link https://rbt.asia/g/thread/50754127

Microsoft burger

Mass produced by a corporation. Comes with standard lettuce, garnish and fries. Tastes okay, can't remove gherkins or add ketchup

Linux burger

Made by a snotty spotty kid with no gloves. Tastes surprisingly good but if you want anything apart from the Burger and bun then you have to bring it with you.

BSD burger

You're not sure who made it, and it tastes a bit odd. Shredded rather than minced meat, not sure what kind. Comes with two thick cut chips. There's a chunk of ice in the middle for no apparent reason.

>>52615071
Mac Burger

Made of polished Aluminium. Inedible.

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>>52604580
>buy windows 7 burger
>I get my order
>its actually a windows 10 burger
>I complain that I didn't order this
>Employee explains that they upgraded my burger and says its better than the windows 7 burger!
>Say that I just want my windows 7 burger
>Before I can finish my sentence the employee suddenly grabs the windows 10 burger off my tray and shoves it down my throat

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>>52615507
10/10

>Windows Burger
The most standard burger you can buy, it tastes decent but you can't add or remove what you want, and to buy it you have to give the restaurant your ID, social security number, credit score, etc.
>OS X Burger
It looks really pretty, but when you bite into it it tastes like sewage between two buns. Despite this, it has a ton of fans who eat it three meals a day and call people who don't like it poor.
>Linux Burger
They hand you a bunch of ingredients and tell you to make it yourself. In the end though, it tastes really good.

>>52615595
>Windows Burger
Standard bacon cheese burger
>OS X Burger
Same burger with less meat and less cheese but wrap around a nice paper sheet, cost x2
>Linux Burger
Bunch of left over burger used to put back together a burger. Looks like a burger but some parts are cold and some are rotten.

>>52609611
kek

shit

>>52604147
same as macdonalds. but everything is curry.

>>52615595
>OS X Burger
Requires a chef license to add any kind of seasoning that's not ketchup.

>>52616206
Terrible

Every time you eat there, there's a staff member stationed across the room watching you eat and shuffling through papers. When you glance in his direction with any degree of uneasiness he hurriedly reassures you that everything is fine.

One Burger
Nuggets 10

>GNU/Linux opens a burger chain
>walk inside
>read the GPLv3
>put in handcuffs
>stuffed in to a van
>sent to a field to pick cabages with polish people
>"no pay, give to comunity!"
>"it's for your freedoms goy!"

Thanks RMS, sat in your comfy chair eating premium crap from your feet.

>>52617979
>this is what *BSD cucks actually believe

chris clements vagina hairs

>>52614040
>been there for two years (command sponsored tour)

It's kinda really true.

They're a tad xenophobic (mainly the older people) but at the same time, "moar murican culture required'.

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=CE4WeUNFX2g

>>52604147
BSOD

>>52604147
There's not just one menu. In fact, some menus refer you to other menus that are increasingly old looking and deprecated. Becoming frustrated, Clippy the waiter comes over to assist you, but he only serves to further your frustration.

>>52604147
Red onion rings of death.

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>>52605626

>>52617979
Great. We're only known abroad for being cabbage-picking gastarbeiters. That's so life affirming.

You faggot won't even appreciate that we're also good at building death camps.

>>52604974
fast-food restaurant version of "all operating systems suck". very nice.

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just gonna drop this here

>>52618378
Actually here you pick onions too, clean toilets and mow grass in the summer.
That's if you're unlucky.

I work for the council and we have a lot of Polish men working on building sites as general labourers and put them through training to get CSCS cards, a lot of them go on to college to learn proper trades and not do too bad for themselves since they aren't as lazy as most natives here.

>>52604147
The burger is too big and comes with everything you could possibly cram on a burger.
There is no way to get anything else.
It also comes drenched in vinegar if you like it or not.

>>52619357
Yeah, the last 10 years or so of socialist fucks in power turned thousands of people into cleaners of English and German shitters. The only upside is when things will get better eventually we'll just take them all back, while the rest of Europe will drown in the flood of sandnigs.

>>52619260
this is the most accurate, non-inflammatory metaphor I've seen

>>52619260
>packed in plastic
>not alive
>pre-cut
gentoo for me then

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>>52606625
I updated the cap of the thread

>>52606233
((crying laughing))

>>52615071
>>52615120
Thanks. Bill Gates is my one and only rove.

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>>52608246

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You order a burger, and wait a while. Ten minutes later you walk up to the counter again and ask them what's wrong. The cashier says, "Something has happened." The shift manager leans out and adds, "Something has happened." The burger-flipper in the back calls out, "Something has happened." They then freeze in place and do not respond no matter what you do.

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>>52619260
>Loonix
>Organic
Chiken Nuggets cost like 2 bucks in most places. Organic shill chicken meat will probably cost more than the meat used in the OSX "chicken", and IT's RAW!

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Free upgrade to 10 patties from 7 or 8.1 patties.

glass burgers?

>>52604147
>You walk into Windows Burgers. What's on the menu, /g/?
What menu?, all i can see is a blue screen.

>>52604299
9/10

>>52604974
thoroughly enjoyed your post anon 11/10

>>52607479
>Walk into ArchBurgers because you heard there was less useless ingredients on the burgers
Lost my shit already

>>52619260
linux should be a live chicken and a dull butter knife

>walk into GNU/Linux burger
>what do you put in your burgers?
>guy at the counter tells you
>invites you to look in the window to see cook prepping ingredients
>how much for a #1?
>pay if you enjoy the meal!
>can I have a copy of the recipe?
>sure, but you have to promise you'll share it
>can I work here too?
>sure

>walk into BSD burger
>what do you put in your burgers?
>guy at the counter tells you, except for a few things he doesn't know
>invites you to look in the window to see cook prepping ingredients, some of it is secret
>how much for a #1?
>pay if you enjoy the meal!
>can I have a copy of the recipe?
>I can give you what I know, feel free to add poison to the recipe, then keep it a secret and distribute it for profit
>can I work here too?
>sure

>walk into macburger
>what do you put in your burgers?
>it's a secret
>how much for a #1?
>a lot
>can I have a copy of the recipe?
>no
>can I work here too?
>sure

>walk into microsoftburger
>what do you put in your burgers?
>its a secret
>how much for a #1?
>a lot
>can I have a copy of the recipe?
>no
>can I work here too?
>sure

>>52623784
Macburger should be more similar to BSD burger than Microsoft burger

>>52623818
macburgers include a great deal of secret and nasty ingredients which is more similar to microsoftburger. some branches of bsd burger contains nasty blobs. some branches of gnu/linux burger also don't follow the original cooking philosophy and contain nasty, secret ingredients.

>>52623868
Macburger is like BSD burger, only instead of "you can't have a copy of the recipe it's more like "sure, here's the recipe for the burger but we're keeping the recipe for our special seasoning to ourselves"

>>52623905
right i got what you were trying to say, but really at the end of the day mac systems contain about 1000% more proprietary secret sauce than any bsd system out of the box. i know you really want to believe in the osx is open sauce meme. but suck a dick

>>52623936
OS X is definitely not open source, but it is based on an open source OS so saying that the recipe for the burger is unavailable is rather false.

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>>52623975
holy shit you fucking faggot, think about 99% of the "applications" that ship in a macbook - all closed sauce. if you think osx is closer to BSD than wangblows in terms of freedom you need to be kicked in your left testicle immediately

(1/2)
>Walk in to MicSoftalds
>"Welcome! We serve a few different burgers here, the most popular is our Professional! It costs a little more than the Home for nothing that you'll notice, but you may as well. Our other versions are available to businesses only, sorry. You can buy an older burger if you wish, but we're trying to discontinue the recipes, we don't want another situation like XP, where people still come in asking for it, 15 years later. For a limited time only, if you bring in the receipt for a 7 or 8 burger, you will get the equivalent 10 burger for free.
>Decide that Enterprise LTSBurger N is the best for you, but the waiter won't let you buy it.
>Walk out of the shop and over to the beach to find pirates. >See one holding up a sign with the Windows logo.
>"Do you have a certificate that will let me get Enterprise editions?"
>"Hacлaждaйтecь бoтнeт" he says as he hands you a certificate and a small machine labelled "no track".
>Walk back to the Windows shop and present the certificate.
>The waiter allows you to get the Enterprise LTSBurger N, and for free at that, which removes all the squares that they decided to put in their regular versions for some reason.

>>52624498
(2/2)
You look around and find another customer enjoying the LTSBurger and ask "pirate?"
>"Of course, who actually pays these days?"
>"Do you know what to do with this?" you ask while holding out the machine.
>You hear the faint scream of "INSTALL GENTOO", a GNUtard must've escaped his basement.
>He looks at it for a second.
>"Ah yes, just put your burger in it and it will remove the tracking devices that MicSoftalds have allegedly been putting in their food. Just be careful that it doesn't add anything of its own."
>"Tracking devices?" you're taken aback. "I thought the regular versions were the only ones that collected anything!"
>"No, deep in the ingredients are microchips to grab little bits and pieces. What it is, or what is done with it, nobody knows."
>"Your burger is ready!" the waiter exclaims.
>"Th-thanks" you mutter as you put it in the machine.
>Once it's done, you take a bite and it tastes great, but it could be better.
>You wander down to the third-party section and find a heap of ingredients being served by various farmers.
>"Why the fuck is your beetroot $1000?" you ask one.
>"It's business grade!" he claims. "And for today only it's 50% off!"
>"Yeah, no thanks."
>You keep looking and grab a bunch of different ingredients from different farmers.
>Once you're done, you eat your burger and it tastes almost perfect, but in the back of your mind, you can't help but wonder, "what IS in this thing?".

>>52604184
>blue waffle of death

... I'd eat that.

File: 1441554074376.gif (956KB, 250x188px) Image search: [Google]

956KB, 250x188px

amazing thread guys

You get buns and a patty for free, everything else (condiments, toppings, drinks, napkins, trays) cost a ridiculous amount of money. You're not allowed to take the burger out of the restaurant or bring your own condiments/toppings with you to Microburger and you must go through an x-ray body scan upon entering and exiting the building to make sure that you remain in compliance Microburger's Burger-Consumer Agreement.

Imagine being a loyal customer of WindowBurgers, you been going there for years, from the very beginning and kept going as they expanded across the country, becoming a huge food chain, you were always excited for the next new menu item and the new recipes. You have nice memories going there and enjoying a delicious meal everytime.

One day you go there and you notice that the restaurant has changed drastically, they installed cameras all over the place, they started hiring stoners and teenagers, big bright screens displaying above your head displaying the menu and the featured item. You try to order the same combo you always order, but the clerk tells you they stopped selling it. You settle for the new one, you super size it like you always do and take your meal to the nearest table.

When you unwrap your burger you notice that it's flat and the ingredients terribly arranged, eating it it's very complicated because it's dripping sauce and falling apart. They forgot to put ice on the coke, and the fries are half cooked, the burger tastes pretty much the same but the presentation is pig disgusting. You complain to the manager and he tells he's terrible sorry and that corporate is working to improve the customer experience. You believe their promises and keep coming back, until you are finally tired of the piss poor job they are doing, they let you down, you feel betrayed...

>>52624060
Included applications may be closed source but much of the operating system itself is not.

>>52626175

contd...

You finally decide to go to a different burger joint, this time you go to that family restaurant across the street, LinuxBurgers, it's been there forever but you were to afraid to try their food. The place is a bit rustic, it looks like they built it themselves. You ask for the menu and they tell you that you can make your own sandwich, simply ask for the ingredients you want and they put it together for you. You are amazed and a bit intimidated at first, you don't know what to order at first so you just go wild with the ingredients. Turns out to taste amazing, very well cooked, they clearly put love in the making.

You are so satisfied with the experience that you keep going there, trying out new flavors, mixing different ingredients. You are not always very happy with the final results, but you don't mind because you know that you can go back and order whatever you already like, the even serve curly fries and a wide variety of beverages and salads. Other customers approach you every now and then to recommend you a new sandwich, you sit together and share meals, you always have a good time meeting new people.

One day you see on TV a commercial, apparently WindowBurgers is advertising a new burger, with a new recipe and even more ingredients than ever. You feel tempted to go back, so you give them a new chance. By the time you get there you notice that they installed even more cameras, the tables and chairs have a different shape and different colors, but the food still doesn't taste quite as good as it used to, you eat in silence. You leave the restaurant, you feel bloated but not satisfied. You never go back again.

>>52604147

or as ive started calling it windows burger + NSA

>osx is more similar to *BSD than to wangblows in terms of freeom
just, fucking, no. no, no.

http://images.apple.com/legal/sla/docs/OSX1011.pdf

vs

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I don't know. All the menu lists are blue and tell me to restart them.

>>52604299
>There are no prices
>The ULTIMATE PRO version [...] is inflated to five times the cost of the lesser versions