>Be me >Just had baby >Want him to be best pro/g/rammer,

>>45458938
Start taking care of your children instead of shitposting on /g/. Fuck off.

>>45458938
Install Gentoo (for him).

>>45458955
/thread

Kill yourself

Let him choose what he wants to do. God I fucking hate parents like you.

Teach him about Richard Stallman's exploits as a hacker. Your baby will love his tteokpaekki skills.

Start singing lullabies in binary.

>>45458938
read sicp

familiarize yourself with c and lua

go to hackthissite and the other wargames site and go through their curriculum

and why would you ever let a woman have your offspring.. youre now accountable for contributing to human suffering

I'm pretty sure he's blinking in some binary code. Pretty sure he is well aware of NSA and won't be foolish to try and communicate without encryption. Can't seem to decrypt it though. Any help

>>45459032
I'm sorry can something other than a woman bare my offspring? Please enlighten me.

>>45458938
I hope you teach your daughter to code too.

>>45459032
>and why would you ever let a woman have your offspring.. youre now accountable for contributing to human suffering
Do you say stupid shit like this all the time or do you only go full retard on the internet?

>Just had baby
You a grill?

>>45458938
put passwords on everything

start easy with like those shapes into a box thing and reward him with food only when it's done

then make it pleb tier hacker like finding your handwritten log-in and passwords somewhere in your office to access the computer, WiFi or parental controls

then fuck with his school work and make him fail a few classes so he has to hack into the school's computers to alter the grades

Then make him feel bad that he graduated in IT and no jobs so he has to hack the FBI or NSA to get a criminal record, but eventually land a job there for being such a bad ass

Then go MIA and die. Put it on your will that you don't want anyone to tell him where you were buried and he must hack his way to your burial site

If your baby success install gentoo, then he officially a /g/

>>45459118
Nice.

>>45458938
How about you stop being a faggot and trying to live vicariously through your child before you fucking damage him.

IF you're a good role model and a good programmer he will follow in your footsteps no his own.

File: 1406921300385.jpg (1MB, 2272x1704px) Image search: [Google]

1MB, 2272x1704px

>>45459118
>and he must hack his way to your burial site
thats the exact plot to watch_dogs_2

                                                                                                                                                         press x to hack urn

Start drinking, alot.
Watch sports channels and nothing but sports channels.
Abuse him, call him a piece of shit.
Feed him nothing but hotpockets.
Buy him a computer.
Ground him to stay in his room for arbitrary reasons.
Constantly remind him how you wanted a son that could throw a football, but you got him instead.

http://coding2learn.org/blog/2013/07/29/kids-cant-use-computers/
Don't let him fall into the shit described here.

>>45459205
I feel for you anon.

>>45459205
Who else had abusive parents here?
Give your kid the same simulation and he is going to live the /g/ life.

Seriously don't force it on him. Just make sure he is exposed to computers and the internet (or you could just have programming books available for it I suppose, but in the 21st century just let him on the internet), so he has the resources to become a programmer if he wants to. My parents are shit with computers, I wanted to become a programmer myself. If he has the resources and wants to, he'll become one.

>>45458938
Home school him.

>>45459075
I think human consciousness, is a tragic misstep in evolution. We became too self-aware, nature created an aspect of nature separate from itself, we are creatures that should not exist by natural law. We are things that labor under the illusion of having a self; an accretion of sensory, experience and feeling, programmed with total assurance that we are each somebody, when in fact everybody is nobody. Maybe the honorable thing for our species to do is deny our programming, stop reproducing, walk hand in hand into extinction, one last midnight - brothers and sisters opting out of a raw deal

>>45459205
>him

why are you so sexist

women are statistically better at coding and were in fact the first developers

>>45459315
Now wait for the retarded comment back from him saying 'no ur stupid, faggot :^)'

File: 1389252598242.png (87KB, 608x580px) Image search: [Google]

87KB, 608x580px

>>45459335

>>45459335
There are more men in Computer Science, yes CS will lead to coding soon 'BUT CS ISN'T CODING.' fuck off back to some feminist website, cunt.

>>45459345
Implying he's not right.

>>45459315
You could have just made the simple argument that it's basic game theory that life is suffering if you assign a positive point to every good thing that happens in life and a negative one to every bad thing.

>>45459377
>he
again with that!
this place is so sexist!

>>45459360
>computer science
>science

kek'd

>>45458938
if it's a girl, teach it to code
if it's a boy, teach it to stop being so privileged and be a plumber or something instead

>>45458938
Fuck off and let the kid do whatever he wants to do, because forcing your children to do something they don't want to do will make them hate you.

>>45459402
Computational mathematics

>>45459118
Is it a human child or is it a dog?

>>45459402
>I chose the name
>We're talking about the hard sciences.

Become loaded with cash.
Hire actually knowledgeably people to teach him, instead of slow courses or just education system in general.
Bank roll his ventures.

Or, get a hooker and for every correct answer gets a little something something.

Play games with him. Cheat.
He'll learn to pay attention to tricks, shortcuts and vulnerabilities in a playful way.

But be a good example and show him he doesn't have to act like a total douche and fuck people over whenever he gets the opportunity.
He's supposed to think you're smart for finding a clever way of bypassing the rules, not that you're an asshole who cheats children because he needs to feel good about himself or because you want his cash.

>>45459405
>>45458938
better yet how about not using harmful gender pronouns and instead letting your child choose which gender best suits it as it develops a sense of self awareness

>>45459409
That's not how it works. People are not in-born with desires--they are instilled.

Forcing someone to do something is a rhetorical gambit, not a conceptual deal.

Conceptually, you FORCE them with specific methods that go behind their official "OMG MY IDENTITY!!!!!!" horseshit.

>>45459066
that would be wasteful

>>45459315
How about we make this thread a place of silent reflection?

leave him

>>45459450
>>45459405
>>45459399
>>45459335
Just fuck off, this is about Technology, not your shitty SJW rhetoric KK?

>>45459059
A dude could, but most straight men prefer when a woman bares them.

>>45459455
No, no.

Humans decide on their own what they want to do at a young age, and it often changes a lot. But no matter what you do, if they don't want to do what you want them to do, they will hate being forced.

Not only that, but children are rebellious by nature, and often do the opposite of what is expected of them, and if they don't, they want to and resent that they can't for whatever reason.

File: 1409460692610.gif (1MB, 320x173px) Image search: [Google]

1MB, 320x173px

>>45458955

Watch guys, we have someone that takes this board seriously.

>>45459482
>this is about Technology
i thought it was about a baby

buy him a C64 and tell him he can't have a smartphone until he figures out how to install gentoo on it

>>45459386
>game
>implying theres a winner

we all die of ass cancer or something else equally as horrific at the end so what the fuck is the point

id kill myself but my biology tricks me into not doing and instead i have this incredible urge to ram my tubesteak into some meat sack

developing AI is the only correct rebuttle to my former argument

>>45459500
OP could have built Astro Boy, he didn't say.

>>45459482
>on /g/
>hasnt masturbated to traps
hahaha yeah right
>getting asshurt when someone defends transsexuals
why do you hate your own homosexuality so much anon?

>>45459539
>why do you hate your own homosexuality so much anon?
because it's wrong to be exclusionary, you got to hate everyone's deviancy and not give yourself special treatment.

>>45459561
well in progressive states like sweden soon the aforementioned behavior will not be the exception and will not, therefore, classified as deviancy which morally it should not be

infact the illusion of sexual deviancy is inherently flawed

File: DiCaprio-and-Hill-in-Wolf-of-Wall-Street.jpg (32KB, 570x300px) Image search: [Google]

32KB, 570x300px

>>45459498
>tfw i have a lucky a crack pipe ;)

>>45459617
>sweden

Give him a computer. Give him internet. Let him use baby programs like "baby type" so he grasps computers before he can even talk or read or write. Just give him free reign on the computer as he desires it.

But, there's one other thing you have to do.
Emotionally stunt him. Doesn't matter what you do, you just need to be bad parents, and create an emotionally stunted kid so that all he has is that computer. He will learn.

>>45459918
or he becomes addicted to games and the internet and lives at home deep into his 20s

>>45459973
Well, the bad parents part is important. You need to be able to fix his computer, but cause emotional strife when you do so that he'll do his best to not involve you

Feed it microchips.

>>45458991
>Let him choose what he wants to do. God I fucking hate parents like you.
I am of the belief you can create an atmosphere where more choices are available without being at the cost of well being.
Giving babby access to stuff like number books instead of having babby play with its balls all day for instance.

>>45459561
A disorder is anything that is disruptive to an individual's functioning as a member of society and as a member of the human race

Any condition that increases the likelihood of contracting a severe illness, results in a failure to participate in normal social functions, and eliminates the possibility of reproduction is a disorder.

Also, the recent homosexuality and transexuality epidemic is being caused by agricultural and industrial pollution. It's not normal human behaviour by a long shot. It's up there with autism in the realm of crippling disorders.

http://www.ourstolenfuture.org/basics/chemlist.htm

T. an actual transexual doomed to be a pathetic mockery of womanhood

Don't support this shit
Don't support more people being born like me
Hate it until people want to stop it from happening

For the love of god my life is a never-ending delusional hell all because some shitty chemicals resulted in me being born just feminized enough to be more turned on by faux-impregnation than penetrating holes

>>45458991
People can't make good choices for themselves

>>45459315
You're a hypocrite.

>>45458938
Is he a boy?
Did you have him circumcised?

>>45459315
All social animals have self awareness as a prerequisite to functioning in large groups where property, territory, and hierarchy are concerns

>>45459505
There's no need for apparent winners/losers in game theory, although I could define the winner of the game easily as the person that receives the most points.