My 14yo son looks like a skeleton. He is skinny as fuck but his face is a little pudgy.
My son skis, but really isn't the team sport kid of kid.
My question is, should I start force feeding him whey and get him lifting?
I am 39 with 3 boys, yes it's my eldest son.
I have been lifting for a year. He isn't going to lift unless I make him do it. He also has the appetite of bird like his mother.
This is a good suggestion
14 is really too young. Get him to try gymnastics, specially tumbling.
Get him lifting at 16 earliest IMHO. The 2 years gymnastic background will help him BIG TIME, especially if he gets into weightlifting (Oly)
I started lifting at 15 and sort of regret starting so young.
Personal reasons really, injuries and growth is your child's #1 concern. I got osgood Schafer desires and tendinitis from lifting. Both of these go away sure, but can lead to bigger issues.
You claim you've been lifting for one year, so while you could give him guidance, I feel like you haven't got enough experience to help him stay safe and lift properly, especially so early on.
15 at least, 16 though is a more appropriate age, and a age he will most likely begin to want to lift.
>personality types have nothing to do with it
Are you some kind of blank slate retard?
I ask again, do you even have children? If you did you would understand that personality has a tremendous amount to do with it. We could identify core personality traits in our children as early as 2 years old.
My father was a pot smoking degenerate alcoholic.
I practicslly raised myself and used his example as to how not to be.. I turned out quite well inspite of him
This isn't going to happen, though I appreciate the suggestion
>Gymnastics and calisthenics are synonymous
My father never stopped being a hippy degenerate, however he was able to keep a very good engineering job his whole life despite smoking pot and drinking constantly.
My mother's drug of choice were horses.
Sadly though I had to learn everyhing on my own as my parents were useless when it comes to life lessons.
Why force your child to do things they have no interest in. Find what he actually enjoys doing and enable him to succeed at his goals. Don't try to relive your childhood through him, I get that a 14 year old probably makes much better gains than a 39 year old. But you should really consider that lifting just isn't for everyone and can be quite tedious.
It's personality,.. My 8 year old begs me to let him lift weights and my 14 year old is just naturally lazy. As I said, it's personality.
I am not trying to inspire him, I am trying to teach him good habits and how to be a man. Not everyone is internally motivated, as I said it's personality.
My dad was a filthy hippie who caught gruesome Crohn's disease in the first Desert storm who nearly died two dozen times in my life & is now past. GREAT MAN
My mom was a flower child who stuck with her man through some horrible bad times, & occasionally liked cocaine.
Love your kid, all I'm saying. President has been or hasen't been sent as far as discipline.
If you really want to drive your point home, I can give you some quality numbers on a couple transcending military schools?
>Why force your child to do things they have no interest in.
Ok son, I will let you do whatever you want
>eating like a bird
>not take showers
I ask again, do any of you actually have children? Not everyone is motivated the same. People have different personalities, some people must be pushed to be better, others like my other son has to be reigned in.
I am simply trying to find how to help my son not be a skeleton. He doesn't want to be a skeleton, but he hasn't the slightest clue and it will take me to force him into proper habits.
>My question is, should I start force feeding him whey and get him lifting?
Would you have liked your father forcing food down your throat at 14?
>asshole dad of the year award contender
Have you even considered what he wants? Granted a 14 year old boy is far from being a genius, but he's not totally stupid either. The best you can or should do is provide an example of what being big and strong is like (in a non-asshole way, if that's even possible for you) and let him make up his own mind. Otherwise he'll never be his own person, and that leads to resentment and bitterness from him down the road; is that what you want from your relationship with your son?
>Would you have liked your father forcing food down your throat at 14?
I didn't have a problem eating, my problem was eating too much. It would probably have been good for them to help me control my weight however as it was a constant point of concern for me.
>Have you even considered what he wants
Yes he would like to not be a skeleton, but doesn't have the personality or propert time preference to do what needs to be done.
Started gymnastics (specifically rings and bars) at 14. Stopped around 16 and got into lifting. Best thing anyone can do.
>physique of a god
>surrounded by qt3.14s all throughout high school
>Upper body strength is off the charts compared to most natty people my age and lifting level.
Only regret was ignoring tumbling. Legs are a little higher than average but nothing near my core/arms.
>Yes he would like to not be a skeleton, but doesn't have the personality or propert time preference to do what needs to be done.
Well let me tell you something (assuming you're not just masquerading as a father that is): I'm old enough to have had several kids that age myself by now, and I remember what an asshole my father was when I was 14 and didn't live up to his midwestern bullshit standards. He thought he could yell, bully, and beat on me physically until I 'complied' with what he wanted of me. Naturally that didn't work, it just made me bitter, resentful, and increasingly stubborn. Have you considered working *co-operatively* with your son, instead of planning on *forcing* him to do shit? If he were an adult would you be trying to enforce your will on him? Probably not. You have to find a way to work co-operatively with him towards what is ostensibly your common goal -- but the choice in the matter is ultimately his, it's his body and his life, and trying to subvert that into what you want instead is not being a good dad at all, it's abusive. Never mind his physicality, think for a moment about what values you're teaching him by example by treating him like property instead of treating him like a human being who needs some guidance. Having someone's respect is more valuable by far than having them fear you.
I am not your father, I don't yell, scream, bully or force. He trusts me and believes in me, he just needs to be told what to do and be held accountable for doing it.
I am simply asking for how's best to help a 14 year old not be a pathetic weakling.
All I have gotten for advice is from the gymnastics fag, which I will not be doing. I live in a small ski resort and gymnastics is not exactly a thing here.
He's 14, that is normal 14 year old behavior. I don't get this ridiculousness, you have a perfectly fine child who does normal 14 year old things and somehow that is not enough?
I get it, he like vidya, he doesn't eat much. But forcing him to do weights so you can have that Father Son commonality is just silly. You have to consider if you are doing this for yourself, or is it really for your child. Because degrading your son by saying he "eats like a bird" and needs to man up is no way to father someone with confidence. And confidence is endemic to the character of a man.
Your disrespect for your son is showing. Even if you never use those words to his face, I guarantee you your non-verbal communication (body language, tone of voice, attitude) says it to him loud and clear. If you actually love and value your son I suggest you first fix that problem within yourself as Step #1.
Step #2 is sit down and work out a plan with him, one both of you can live with. If he balks at any plan then you need to determine if this really is what he wants to do, or if he's just saying that thinking it's what'll make YOU happy, which would not at all be uncommon for a 14 year old kid to do with his parent. There should be no 'forcing' of anything involved in this, he's not causing harm to himself or others, he's not doing anything illegal or immoral, he's just not doing what YOU want him to do. So there's your course of action.
>degrading him by saying he eats like a bird
He does eat like a bird, he has the appetite of his mother, this is a factual statement. I have to remind him to eat as he could go 8 hours without eating. Would you prefer that I let him starve himself and stunt his growth? Is that what a good father would do? A good father would let him just do whatever he pleases?
>I won't give you these vitamins son, in fact I won't even tell you they exist, because I don't want to impose on you and since you didn't ask for them I won't give them
What kind of terrible advice is this?
>sit down and make a plan
That is why I am here, I am not sure where to push him.. He needs more physicality in his life than just skiing and the best way is if we can do it at home.
I already spend three nights a week lifting so it would be easy to include him in my schedule. If not I am ok with making him do body weight exercises.. By making him do it I mean, telling him when he needs to do it and making sure he does it.
>Would you prefer that I let him starve himself and stunt his growth?
Christ on crutch, I have a harder and harder time believing you're a parent at all, you sound totally and completely clueless. OF COURSE you wouldn't do that you idiot, that would actually cause harm to him. But all this other shit you want from him? Totally optional, and depending on how much of a jerk you're being about it, bordering on abuse. See above: >>35996220
>I am not sure where to push him..
You just don't get it do you? He's not sitting on his ass all the time playing video games, at least he goes out and does something, and skiing isn't that easy. How about you *encourage* him to be a better skiier instead of trying to make him into whatever it was YOU were never able to be?
>He needs more physicality in his life than just skiing
Says who? You? Again: You sound like you're trying to live vicariously through your kid, because you were a fatass when you were a kid and have regrets about it. Classic parenting mistake. Stop trying to fix the mistakes of your youth through someone else, he's not your goddamned proxy!
I say the kid eats like a bird and you claim I am insulting him.
I am trying to provide factual information. He is naturally a lazy child who eats like a bird. He is also pathetically weak for his size and looks like a skeleton without clothes.
These are factual statements. Do I need to list all the things he is good at? Would this make you feel better?
I am simply trying to point out his weaknesses and guide him as to how to improve those weaknesses.
Knowing ones weaknesses and finding ways to work around them is what a good father should do. A good father doesn't just let a child's weaknesses hold him back.
>he called the degenerate nihilist a degenerate nihilist.
Your kids will probably get tattoos, pixie cuts, color their hair orange and become pansexuals.
Congratulations on being such a great parent.
why are you so obsessed with something that if you force it on him it could lead to years of him not willing to do it because he was put in a situation he was made to do it. As someone has pointed it realistically you shouldn't be lifting till at least 16 unless you want to take a risk with his long term health. The eating thing might be a concern, but try and get him involved in a sport, you can't super undereat and take part in any sport really
>probably a fascist
Well I am a reactionary but I prefer Facism over democracy yes.
We've known that democracy was a terrible system more than 2 thousand years ago and yet you probably think universal suffrage is a good thing.
I've got to say, if this is a troll thread, it's a 10/10, because you're actually pissing me off with your clueless attitude.
My father was a carpenter his whole life. He wanted both of us to be carpenters. I like building things, find it interesting, but I hated working on jobsites, didn't like the people I worked with, or the whole construction culture. I liked electronics and computers, things he didn't understand or see any value in. I took unending amounts of crap for it, including a considerable amount of physical abuse. It wasn't until my 30's that he was forced to admit that MY interests paid off in the end, as I make as much or more than a carpenter would have. Of course his authoritarian, controlling, manipulative, abusive ways continued anyway, and as a result I haven't spoken to him in decades. Is that what you want?
He's 14. He doesn't know what he wants yet. It is ABUSIVE of you to try to IMPOSE your interests on him, especially when it's blindingly obvious that you're trying to fix YOUR mistakes of YOUR life by making HIM into the things you were never ABLE to be. You want to be a Good Dad? You OFFER him things you're interested in, but you LISTEN to him and your ENCOURAGE him to find his own way, his own interests. Otherwise: What if, through your 'forcing' him to be this-or-that, he misses out on being, say, a gold-medal-winning Olympic skiier? Or a Nobel Prize-winning scientist? Successful artist? Doctor, lawyer, any number of things? There are no time machines, you can't tell what the future holds. But the way you're going about this is NOT GOOD.
>I am asking on how to help him get some mass and strength
WHAT IF THAT IS NOT WHAT HE REALLY WANTS TO DO!?
Is he your SON or is he your PRISONER, sentenced to forced labor until he's at least 18?
Excellent father, all of my kids think I am great as do my wives girlfriends.
I could get him in football, we've talked about it, but he honestly needs at least some muscle to protect him.
He doesn't have to lift, but a regimine of body weight exercises perhaps?
His core problem could simply be not eating enough. I don't know, I didn't have this problem as a kid because I ate plenty and worked on a ranch, so I got food and physical work.
At his age I was throwing hay bales up onto trucks, carry calves all over the place etc, there is no way in hell he could do such a thing
The kid IS high.
He's about to flunk his shit.
NIGGER IFFIN YOU CAN AFFORD IT......................................................MILITARY GOD DANM SCHOOL FOR THE LOT OF YOU MILENNIELS. gENERATION X WAS A THING.
>all of my kids think I am great as do my wives girlfriends
You're such a great husband that you've been divorced AT LEAST ONCE? TROLLOLOLOLOLOL
So you're working on at least Divorce #2, fucking around on the side? TROLLOLOLOLOLOLOLOL
Great troll thread OP, 10/10, you totally had me going. Who are you really? Come on, game's up, time for you to come clean.
I am not your father, get over yourself.
>If my son wants to be a skeleton he should be able to be a skeleton
He doesn't want to be a skeleton, Jesus Christ. He just doesn't eat and doesn't do any exercise other than ski.
He needs guidance and I am asking how best to guide a 14 year old, to get a little mass. He looks like skeletor.
>I am not your father, get over yourself.
You sound at least as bad, asshole.
>He doesn't want to be a skeleton, Jesus Christ.
You so sure about that, troll-dad?
>He just doesn't eat and doesn't do any exercise other than ski.
Implying skiing isn't a stenuous endurnace sport
>He needs guidance and I am asking how best to guide a 14 year old, to get a little mass. He looks like skeletor.
I'm pretty sure he only says he wants to be bigger just so you won't hit him again and keep verballing abusing him.
if you force him to do anything he's gonna hate it and he'll stay skelly for longer
just buy him a gym membership (pretend you got a deal for buying 2 people or some shit) or get yourself some weights for home and offer to let him use them
>hit him again
Ok molly, I haven't spanked this kid in 10 years.
>implying skiing isn't strenuous
Considering I get a million feet in vertical every year I know exactly how "strenuous" skiing is.
>he only says
He didnt say squat, I saw him without his shirt and told him he looked like a skeleton and I would help him fix that.
I already home gym.. I don't force I tell and he does it, just like when you give a kid vitamins.
>offer to let him use them
Implying he would have the slightest clue how and would have any motivation to do so rather than you know watch YouTube or play csgo
>humiliating your son over his physique when he's at an age where he's already super-sensitive about his body
>Asshole Father of the Year Award contender
Some of you shouldn't be allowed to reproduce, you suck at it.
Implying I can't handle this..
This kid can't be humiliated, he isn't sensitive to that kind of thing. My other son however is extemely sensative to his appearance etc
This board isn't the place for much great parenting advice. Most of these tards don't have kids and hopefully never to procreate.
Here's the deal, like you said it is personality. My son is 13 and he begs to me to lift. He has raced bmx since he was 5 and always been around people who inspire him to train hard.
Now should you hold a gun to your kids head and be a dick to him if he doesn't work out good enough? No... but your job as a father isn't to do what your kid wants to do. Your job is to raise him to be a man.
Lifting weights builds confidence and makes you feel better about yourself. Also if you want to fuck hot bitches, you have to be in shape enough to keep up with them. Don't raise a pussy. Teach that boy how to lift. You aren't there to be his best friend, show him how to be a man.
Good luck dude!
I've done as much research as I could find on the topic of kids lifting weights. Here's the deal, there is no actual study showing it's bad for them. Just a bunch of bullshit that boils down to your mom telling you not to jerk off or else you'll go blind.
Look at kids who grow up on farms. They lift shit and do work and they turn out to be beasts.
I don't believe in high reps for beginners. I think you're better off keeping reps low and working on form. 3 x 5 or 5 x 5. Maybe 3 x 8 for some things. Keep the weight low so he doesn't get hurt and slowly increase over time.
Protein is also totally fine. Try to get a decent quality protein so he won't hate drinking it and it won't be full of a bunch of other bs.
And hey being skinny isn't the worst problem to have. If he puts on some muscle over the next couple of years he'll be in amazing shape.
Also occasionally you have to be a dick to your kid. Fuck what everybody thinks as long as the motivation behind it is love for your kid and not your own ego then who cares.
As much as I don't want someone yelling at me telling me what to do, I'm probably a lot more on the ball when someone helps keep me in check. We all can use a little push to be better.
Got a blender? This particular recipe packs like 936 calories with protein powder added
Don't add the protein powder though it'll give the kid deathly farts. Anyway, a high calorie shake like that daily could help him pack on some mass without giving him the hassle of sitting down and eating real food. Most teenagers hate cooking but I bet your son could accept putting ingredients into a blender and gulping it down in 30 seconds.
As for getting him to do more physical shit, I don't know man it's a hard subject. My gf's mother was a dance teacher and she cried when her mom tried to get her to keep dancing when she was like 10 so her mom caved. Today her body is skinnyfat and she wishes her mom kept her on it so she could be in the shape of her sister that continued dancing.
Her sister that kept dancing cried too but this time her mom didn't cave and forced her to do it. She's super grateful for it and dances to this day. She recovered from giving birth incredibly fast because she was in great shape.
I think you should push your son towards gynmastics as another anon suggested or weight lifting, even oly lifting.
Find a coach on
then google the names of coaches in your area or just call them. Take care when pushing your son towards something and don't forget to pump the brakes if it seems like he really hates it.
You also don't need to force him to lift yet, mainly because it will make him very conscious of his body (I started lifting at 13, I injured myself and it fucked my body confidence, it's also not necessary for him to be healthy).
Introduce him to sports, if he's not a team player (I can relate, I used to suck at team sports, autism for the win) introduce him to something else such as gymnastics or some shit. Also whey isn't needed to get out of skelly mode if you're a fucking teen. You don't need that much sugar and protein (which are found in whey) when you're not even fucking lifting.
kids imitate their peers far more than their parents. That's why you can tell kids drugs are bad, but they'll still try it to impress the cool guy and the girl who gives blowjobs according to rumors
>any fitness regime will be done at home
Who wants friends right?
Also, is he normal,outgoing? or the type of teen that likes furry porn this is important for your initial approach
Jesus Christ are you faggots retarded?, he goes to school and skis. He socializes with friends already.
I am saying a regular fitness regimine for home that way it actually continues long term.
hey, I started lifting at 13 (I'm 19 now) under my dads guidance, do it as a bonding activity, 13-16 year old me benefitted greatly from lifting 2-3 times a week; better health overall, looking better to all those girls I was trying to pick up and increased self-confidence.
Or, as others have mentioned, go for rugby. however, a few of my mates on our Uni's rugby team already have fucked up backa and knees so get him to take it easy.
Finally, you sure he's fully hit puberty? One of my mates from high school was a late bloomer and just put on muscle as he went through puberty without having to work out at all, just a healthy diet. Good luck man, wish you and your son well
As someone who is still under 20 let me tell you a bit about how I felt doing stuff with my dad. I guess you could say I was also "naturally lazy" but I always wanted to do my own thing without anyones help to prove to my dad I could. I was also scared that my dad would judge me if I wasn't good at what he wanted me to be good at. If you want your son to start lifting you're going to have to get him to think it's his idea, and let him do it by himself.
My main suggestion would be to introduce him to this website because that's how I got into it. I read the sticky and by myself figured out what I had to do.
Your 14 year old son?
Jesus christ gramps, what the fuck are you doing on 4chan?
I'm guessing you're approaching your 40's by now. You need to reevaluate your life. Stop trying to fix your son, and fix yourself.
just let the kid choose whatever sport he likes you hovering faggots
>gymnastics is not for cucks
what you think is happening:
>I am going to lead my son to a good life so he can be confident
what is actually happening:
>fat failure of a dad projecting his lack of a father figure on his son
>fuck kid lol Im fooking selfmade be a man
>lol u fooking skinny faggot mang
>u gon lift and eat big now faggot
>if you fail at that your life will suck