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Fight Stories thread
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Ever been in a fight /fit/?
Share your stories, I'll start.

>be 20
>been lifting for only 2 years
>still looked somewhat "big"
>be at festival near port dover
>chillin on beach side with pals
>one of my buddys friend shows up with a group of guido-douchebags
>one of my friends is a skinny pale robot
>they start picking on him
>"hey twig, wheres your girlfriend at bud?"
>"oh wait you're still a virgin"
>I tell them to fuck off and leave us alone
>4 of them get in my face and says they train mma and shit
>I stupidly laugh in their face
>typical pushing starts
>never been in a fight before
>I throw a punch at the guy in my face
>knocks him out cold
>as soon as I see him drop 3 others jump on me and beat me silly
>broken nose, black eyes, gash below my temple
>they pick up their friend and leave because cops often patrol the beach
>older couples running to see if im okay
>I sit up and don't feel much pain until later
>I'm all swollen and beaten and full of adrenaline
>my friend says "..thanks anon"
>still close friends today

I went to the hospital after that, few stitches.
Sucked desu. Wish I had a better story but that's all I got.
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i prefer justice over being a weak loser anon
>freshman in high school, never been in a fight
>fastforward to today
>still haven't been in a fight outside of training because I'm an adult not a child who cant use words
fucking pathetic OP
It's not about you, kiddo.
It's about the aggressor.
You can use words but some people will undoubtedly threaten you and you have to defend yourself. You must be from a white-only safe-zone suburb.
I'm a Mexican from the ghetto and currently a Marine who deals with belligerent shit heads every day. If an aggressor won't take no for an answer than I'm still not gonna get in a fight, I'm gonna use the least amount of force necessary to stop the threat while protecting myself including lethal force if necessary. Fighting is stupid
Not much but I don't get in fights really.
>pub crawl with brother and his gf/my gf
>getting off bus, letting them go ahead (tips)
>commotion behind me
>2 guys yelling pushing
>duck in between, hand on either of them
"Ladies ladies, there's plenty to go around"
>few people laugh, one of the guys do
>turn to him and say "you good bro?"
>"yeah man" smiles and leaves
>turn to face other guy
>"haymaker" to the jaw
>guys shit faced, hardly a love tap
>grab him and push him into seat
now remember this guy thinks he just hit me with the right hook to end all fights
>guy looks terrified, shittingbricks.pdf
>walk back to friends and have fun
I've never been in a serious fight, to be honest. I try to avoid that sort of thing. I'm very prone to losing my shit and I don't want to do something stupid and end up killing someone with an unlucky punch.

>Walking to class
>Some guy punches me in the back of the head
>"F-f-fight like a man!"
>I calmly turn to look at him
>"I just want to go to class"
>"Y-y-yeah! Y-you go!"
>Walk to class

He could have killed me if he hit me right. He was probably scared since he didn't throw another punch once I turned to look at him, I'm pretty sure he backed up a little too.

Hopefully he'll die young.
And I'm guessing you could kill me in 300 different ways, using only your hands, right?
Filthy mexican get the fuck off my board
No just 1 using a weapon I'm trained with to do that specifically. You're the one behaving like a nigger, it's not my fault you got your ass kicked by a bunch manlets
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god the cringe is great.
but seriously, back to redit with you boy
Lol whatever dude, enjoy your little thread where everyone's laughing at you for getting your ass kicked as a direct result of acting like a white dindu
Why did he punch you? lol
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oh god the spic is angry
somebody hide me he's going to use his extreme marine training on me :(
So you were the gf anon?
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>Mfw im an ex army mp and even i think youre a moron
On mobile so no green text.
This Super Bowl sunday my brother who is 6 years older than me gets drunk and starts talking shit to my mom, sister and I. This shits been going on for months. He's a fuckin skelly so ik I'll handle him. Got sick of his shit and hit his cigarette out of his mouth. He went to throw a punch, I blocked if and nailed him in the face twice. He throws a beer bottle at me almost hit me and runs and locks himself in his room cause he knows I'd woop him.
Wow boy you went from 0 to stupid in almost record time.
Almost. You're not even the best at being fucktarded
Donkey balls
Started training mma for like 1 month get jumped and mugged at local mall with friend I fight off to attackers friend does fuck all one of them pulls a shank on me but cops magically appear save my life good times.
OP might not have got his ass beat if he didn't sucker punch the first guy.
>Be 5'7 15 year old sophmore 2010
>Played Highschool Football and got into weight training a little more than a year ago
>150lbs at 16% BF
>At family get together and 14yo 5'9 skele cousin starts calling me weak and a pussy and shit
>Call him an autist and leave, as I have a fever
>Go to living room try to fall asleep
>Jealous skele Autismo walks over and starts trying to tase me with fingers, still throwing insults around
>Tell him to bug off doesnt listen
>Third time I had enough; Im a patient guy but he broke me
>Get up hold him by the neck / jaw area with one hand throw him back 5 feet hits head on wood side of sofa
>The look of absolute terror in his eyes, walks off says nothing
>Best nap of my 2010 year
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>get in a fight with some faggot one day
>didn't know at the time but turns out he was in a gang
Fast forward a week:
>minding my own business
>3 cunts approached me
>start shouting their gangster gibberish about me getting in trouble with one of them
>they surround me
>at that point I just knew shit would go down
>try to get out of the circle and run
>one of them put me in a headlock and another headbutt me, they started punching and kicking
>still trying to run but was getting hit in the head, body etc
>felt a sharp pain in my stomach which at the time I just assumed had been a really hard kick

After that I just remember them running away and getting in a car. I got up first thinking "well this wasn't too bad I'm still intact", standing up, taking 10 steps and collapsing again from the pain, then I saw blood on me and realized what hat happened and passed out. Woke up in an ambulance then passed out again and woke up in the hospital.

pic related: stab scar
gnar bro
Dude i'd be so fucking pissed if someone fucked my abs up like that
>fucked up
dude that scar probably pulls more chicks than the abs

Fuck dude, that's hardcore. I've been told off many people who've been stabbed that you don't actually acknowledge that you've been stabbed and it feels like you've been winded/burned with a hot object. What was the damage?

Also two of my own, one victory one loss:

> Be 16, amateur boxer just won my first fight pretty confident before that just skinnyfat beta faggot.
> Doing the typical British thing and drinking cheap beer in a park on a Friday night, friend runs up to me and tells me some kid punched my little brother in-front of all of his friends at other side of park
> Walk over to gang of kids, this kid is pretty stoned/drunk and he's shouting and making out that he is the ringleader - skinny lanky hoodrat apparently drug dealer
> Nervous as fuck but demand explanation he starts giving me abuse so I demand we fight
> He tries to kick me, dodge it and unload a payload of punches into his face and as he drops throw into his ribs
> Everyone is flabbergasted, I walk away - he gets up and chases after me demanding more - proceed to drop him multiple times before me and my friend decide to take off as his friends have called for backup
> Get brick thrown at house later that night, misses window but still puts huge gouge in wall. Go to the kids house, I've knocked out 2 teeth broken his nose and bust his lips up - we shake hands and I apologize to him (Even tho I wasn't sorry at all)
Doubt it
Yeah it's a strange feeling, I wouldn't say it feels like burning, it just feels like blunt impact, like someone kicked you or punched you really hard in the area mixed with a cramp-like sensation.

Damage could've been a lot worse. Only the muscle got cut, it missed the liver by a little bit.

And props for defending your brother m8.
chicks dig scars breh

Two years later:

> Got chubby since boxing, back on track to being skinnyfat.
> Post-gym session and after a night of furious masturbation decide to go to McDonalds with friends. (This was pre-/fit/)
> We stay till 10 eating food talking shit
> Gang of hoodrat chavs come in, sit in corner being loud clearly high/drunk etc.
> As I'm walking out one of them who is clearly on crack or coke - really fucking wired shouts "WHAT THE FUCK U LOOKIN @ M8"
> With two friends, so tell him I wasn't looking at him and that he can fuck off
> "GET OUTSIDE THEN" expecting me not to bother. My pride gets the better of me and I agree.
> We go outside and basically trade blows for a minute or so - like the final fight in Goon. He has the edge since he is on one or more class A drugs and I'm not only bloated but gassed out of the gym and wanking - so he pretty much out guns me (Although I also fuck him up too) boxing skills don't work when you're not
> McDonalds staff say they've called police - so they all take off.

Since then I've took up Muay Thai and serious lifting, would now destroy the guy if I seen him again, however apparently he has done some time in prison for stabbing someone and possession of class A.
you had any fights since starting muay thai?
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the last fight i was in was in 7th grade. lol. for context, i was a fat kid through middle school and always got bullied.

>in PE class, coach just called the end of the game (think it was dodgeball)
>talking with a buddy to avoid the rush to the locker room.
>a random nignog appears. he pushed me from behind, i fell and busted my lip on the coach's chair.
>we square off, the coach sees, asks us "are you guys good?" in an authoritative tone.
> we say "yeah" and the nignog heads into the locker room, i stay behind and chat with my buddy for a few more mins.
>I go in locker room, nignog and his two friends are hooping and hollering how he kicked my ass.
>i try to ignore it and walk past his aisle to get to mine. his locker is right at the front of the aisle, so i have to walk by him to get to mine.
>he's got his pants around his knees, in the middle of changing his pants i guess (or maybe that's just how he wore them, inner city youth, amirite?)
> the guy fucking slaps me in the face with his pants down
>i get enraged and i guess i decided to defend myself.
>shoulder check him.
>into the bench in the center of the aisle.
>he table-tops over it and hits his head on a locker
> his nignog buddies start hooping and hollering threats at me, getting in my face.

coaches weren't allowed in the locker room, so that could have went bad for me, quickly. I said ok, and went and got changed. they never spoke to me again, and that's when anon stopped getting bullied!

sorry for the shit story, but it's all i've got.
how much damage did the chav do to you breh?
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>final year of school
>there's this idiot everyone hates but are afraid to call out
>he already failed the year once
>already initiated in the art of lifting
>he is 18 but looks like a beast
>im ottermode at best from rowing and track
>one day I get in an argument with him
>he gets out during lunch and bursts the tyres of my scooter and breaks the headlight
>im so fucking mad
>too proud to call the police
>decide instead to "beat" someone twice my size
>we fight after school
>he fucks my shit up in front of half the school
>lesson in humility learned
>should've called the police instead

me on the left and him on the right to have an idea of just how huge this cunt was
>small get together, get hammered
>we walk to a local park
>some other drunks there
>don't know what the fuck happened, but one guy challenged me to a fight while I was chatting with my mates, and wouldn't stop kicking me in the back
>after the 2nd or 3rd kick I fucking lunged at him and insta-headlocked
>his mates got worried and we're about to intervene, but he managed to slip me
>my mates are fucking pussies and just watch and walk back
>guy puts me in a headlock, twisting and straining, literally tries to break my neck
>throw myself sideways and tip us both on the ground
>shiiit my neck, that hurt
>slip him, pull some wrastlin moves and pin him with his face down til he stopped thrashing
>considered elbow smashing the back of his skull
>decided against it, then my friends dragged me off, and his friends took him and walked away.
Wish I hurt him more, I felt like a bitch for not escalating it like he tried to do with the neck snap moves.

Nah, luckily I haven't had to get into any fights - came close a few times usually with people who would probably wrek me. Almost got into a fight with a roided out window cleaner 2 months ago, would have probably won but I'd rather not find out. If I fought anyone now, I'd use lowkicks, groin strikes, oblique kicks to the knee etc. Nobody is prepared for that in a street fight.


Bust lip and some bruising really, He dropped me but I also dropped him so evens I guess. Just sucks not kicking someones ass who deserves it.

> Fighting someone double your size without a grounding in one or more martial arts and plenty of fight experience.

thats fucked up man, did you know the guy who challenged you? also how old were you when this happened?
Sounds like you're the autismo here anon I'm sure the fever affected your judgement but it's clear your cousin was just fucking around.
iv never been i a fight before but i was close
Phone so fuck green text

Outside my house, large land. Obviously owned vy my parents. Im 19 during this time.
Im not really fit but i tried to be (skelly mode). Had people over cause no rents.
More and more people show up to party.
Keep party outside in the back yard, its pretty huge

Grtiing a bit late, teo guys are shit faced idk who theyvare but one keeps calling me a pussy.
He starts pushing me and i trll him to get off my property and go home.

He gets super pissed and raises his voice absolutely angry. His buddy keeps egging him on.

No one seems to want to stop it.
Except my dog
My dog is a Caucasian shepard, my dad brought him from over seas.

The guy lays on hands, my dog sees im distressed and goes nuts.

Head butts the dick and he falls down right away. Serj bites his leg and does that teisting shit. Guy is screaming for life.
I panic cause my dog might kill him, run inside and grab a piece of chicken and show it to him.
Guy fucks off along with most the people.
That bitch was crying as he limped off.

I love my dog lol
shit man, you're lucky he didn't try to get it put down
>be you
>mega autist weakling bullied throughout hs
>signed up for a tiger schulmans karate course
>believes hes buddha for being to afraid to ever fight
Not really a real fight story but close
>Training with a friend, boxing
>We are doing 30% speed punches to each other to practice blocks and slips
>He decides to just go 100% speed
>Hes going too fast, can't really control his attacks. Kicks me in my face as i slip a punch even though we only doing punches
>See stars and have to stop for a minute
>Ive been doing 30% speed this whole time
>He keeps doing 100% speed
>Decide to go 100% speed now
>Trap him in corner and just keep getting him with body shots
>He quits soon after

Pisses me off that he decided to turn up from the start but when I start doing it, he just quits.
>his gf/ my gf
Y'all share the same gf?
Let me fix that for you

"Hey it's Jason Blaha here, If an aggressor won't take no for an answer than I'm still not gonna get in a fight, I'm gonna use the least amount of force necessary to stop the threat while protecting myself including lethal force if necessary. Fighting is stupid. All right that's really all i had to say, I hope it's been informative, and i'll see you guys next time."

Wanna give us a biceps shot, "the monster" ?
FUCK they straight up cut you open! I expected it was just gonna be a little puncture wound.
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only one

>leaving movie
>say to friends "Let's go downtown right now"
>35 y/o Mexican thinks I'm talking about his 200 pound wife
>gets in my face
>"We were planning our evening. Apologize, turn around, and walk away."
>tackles me into a brand new SUV behind me, leaves ~8" dent
>throw him to ground and my friends split us up
>he leaves, get license plate #, call police and report damaged vehicle
>he has to come back from North Dakota a month later for court

pic related
>learning to fight



i'd love to fucking see any "trained professional" fighter fuck with me and get a crowbar to the back of the head, a bullet between their teeth or something else

I'm fucked up man, you do NOT want to mess with me and everyone can tell, so no one messes with me

but one day, one of you faggots will probably try to fight me, maybe its in the gym, maybe the street, maybe a bar.

just know I'll be ready and you will -not- know what hit you
I'm scared.

>Being this tough on the internet
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Of course , because you're going to pull your glock in a packed bar or club, assuming they even let you in.
a bottle or glass and a quick flick of the wrist leaves me with a half a foot of jagged blade, an edge sharper than even surgical scalpels and the finest of blades.

another half a second and you're bleeding out from your jugular, no guns, no fuss, no you :)
Holy shit you are cool
You are a gaytard.
>no guns, no fuss, no you :)

Pure autism
The likelihood of you both encountering me, fucking with me and surviving is... nil, to say the least
Ah, you may think so, anon, but i assure you my wit and tactical prowess will out match whatever edge you think you possess. Crazy? You've obviously never met me. I will turn your skin inside out and play with your blood.
You're Alpha as shit good on you for standing up for yourself man.
>be 17
>be on kyokushinkai karate for 9 years
>be with friends out drinking
>older faggots start harrassing us
>big dude of our group starts talking mad shit
>friend group starts roasting the faggots
>fags get mad and attack big dude
>Waitwat.jpeg there are 7 of them
>oh shit only 4 with me included
>big guy gets tackled
>they charge at us
>friend takes out knife
>gets countered and arm broken
>"these guys got some mad moves"
>kick one of them on the chin
>instant K.O
>faggots shift attention to me
>friends pick off two other guys
>still four to deal with
>kick one of them
>get lowkick on my support foot
>get punched but managed to get up without serious damage
>suddenky one gets a brick thrown at him
>big guy is up
>two people charge him
>one left focusing on me
>kick him in the face so hard that he smashed into the wall
>big guy picks one of them up and throws him into the canal
>lol holy shit
>friends take out the two other guys
>last ons runs

>get stabbed
>alpha as fuck

>Implying all the best 80s action heroes haven't gotten stabbed or shot at a couple of times
Get on his level m8
Thanks breh, was one scary situation to be in. At least when I let my body hair grow the scar is almost invisible.

disappointed you didnt scream "BACK THE FUCK OFF?!!?!?!"

personal property, trespassing, self defense
>6th grade
>getting bullied constantly by this fucking dick from Laos
>bigger than me by half a foot early puberty
>pushes me down and makes me eat dirt in front of my gf
>humiliated try to ignore him
>corners me with his mates the next day pushes me down again
>tries to make me eat dirt in front of gf again
>something snaps I become enraged >shout out of nowhere ,"I don't know you! That's my purse!"
>kick him in the nuts

sup mr. skelly
First fight of my life, and fat as fuck.

>Be 17y/o cow
>Pedaling to class when car almost hits me
>Two cows inside yelling and cursing at me
>Yell back and continue on
>At a red light I hear loud cursing and look around
>Same two cows
>Green comes on and they throw diet cokes at me as the drive by
>Shit goes on and they follow me to campus
>They park and find me
>Mooing match starts
>People watching
>Cow A swipes at me with her Cheeto dusted fingers and lands a hit on my cheek
>Lose my shit
>Cow A and I are swinging blindly at each other while cow B is jumping in at my side to grab my hair and clothes
>One punch at cow B and she is leaking
>Cow A gets a handful of my hair and is pulling the shit out of it
>Hair line recedes two inches
>I trip cow A somehow and she and I end up on the floor
>Straddle this bitch and punch the shit out of her
>Cow A is covering her face and crying for help
>Calls me a man and white knights all jump in
>White knights arrive pull me off while cow b is trying to punch at me
>Campus police arrive and these cows run for it

I had a few bald spots on my head and torn clothes but that's about it. Haven't gotten in a fight since.
>nothing personal, kid
*teleports behind you*
Diamond encrusted edge right there
Both of you look small as fuck
literally kill yourself
>anon be 19
>walking home from party, super rural
>seen some red neck types i remember from school
>start calling me fag, cos i like to dress in tight jeans and leather jackets (ottermode so suit my physique)
>blow the rednecks a kiss and continue on my way
>they start following with the catcalls
>one of them gets right in my face - literally 6inches taller than me, and farmer bulid. Big fucking round shoulders and huge arms from throwing hay bales about i guess
>think fuck it, and throw the almighty of almighty upper cuts, knocks his head back a little
>straightens his head a little and says "that all you got pussy..."
>oh fuck
>turn in my heels and fuckin ruuuuuuuuuuuun.
>feel shit
>feel better about myself 3yrs later when I fuck his horney 18yr old sister and i see him in the pub, fat, bald a drinking cheep lager
p-post body pic?
>Muay Thai
if I were to learn any martial arts it would probably learn Muay Thai as some of the moves seem to be simple and effective like the low kick.

Is there any way I could learn a move or two from Muay Thai without actually going to a trainer?
fuckin noice he got cucked big time
>bursts the tyres of my scooter and breaks the headlight

Sounds like he did you a favor
>out with friend
>drunk fat fuck comes up to my skinny mate
>"Oi cunt you owe me a drink you stole one off me before"
>never seen you before in my life.jpg
>friend doesn't know him either
>tell him to fuck off
>he does
>30 minutes later
>we're standing outside gathering friends to move bars
>guy comes up to us again, bottle in hand
>starts abusing friend
>drunkenly swings bottle at skinny friend
>other friend has been watching and hits his arm away
>I straight up hit him in the face from the side, cunt hits taxi parked beside us and then ground
>walk away like nothing happened

Not sure what that guy was on but his reactions were shit and his eyes were bloodshot as fuck
>Not even once
Sweet family guy reference bro
Its koth you dip
Its kath you dip
god dammit Bobby.
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Project mayhem mother fucker
Joined a fight club at college this year.

Shit's fun as hell
>nothingn personnel kid
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The eye gouge is no joke... Lets not get into forward and reverse knife hand strikes...

Pretty cringey m8
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>be me
>at punk show
>some anti leftist literal faggot has bee stink eyeing me all night since im rightwing
>sucker punches me
>throw him to the floor and kick his ass
>he runs away
>look for him for an hour
>find him
>he starts talking shit
>swing a hard haymaker and clobber him
>some 5'3 tumblrista thats with him proceeds to claw at me
>tell her to fuck off
>shes yelling and telling me to fight her
>"im not going to hit a woman"
>she freaks out and calls me a sexist

"fight club"

like martial arts or a bunch of guys drinking beer and failing about with their shirts off?
you sound like a euro
wooow, scary

this sounds like something a fucking neckbeard would say

>what is white trash family

and people are making fun of the beaner that actually served his country.


Well guise i can say that my shivers have been officially timbered somebody be my husbando bodyguard.

I never knew this thread hid dick measuring, why can't you fuckers be civil proud murricans having a chuckle with one another?
>right wing at a punk show
yuo r nazi
Sounds like he was on alcohol
Eiffel towers every night brah. Fucking made it.
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Best thing ive read all week
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I know that feel

> There's this fucking oaf at my boxing place
> 20kg heavier than me, 1.5 inches shorter
> Doing drills and what have you
> Always goes 100% speed like you say
> Sees training as a competition doesn't want to learn/let me learn
> Thinks he's awesome for "winning" drills
> End of session
> Free sparring
> Fuck his ass up
> Says to me "You got a few good ones in"
> Like he's in a place to be condescending to me
> Acts like he just went easy on me despite cowering against the ropes
> mfw
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My first and only fight ever

>be 7-8 years ago
>had been lifting like crazy for a year or two
>went to a bar with friends, and i was wearing a popped collar bro shirt, abercrombie or some shit like that (teeenager lel)
>Went to the bar straight from the gym so i was still on a pump
>proceed to get pissed out drunk
>some guy tries to piick a fight with me cause I looked swole
>just laugh it off and go to the toilet to take a piss
>he comes in and tries to fight me in the fucking toilet
>my beast mode friend grabs him and kicks him out of the bar, and we continue drinking
>soon all my friends tell me the douchebag is waiting outside saying he wants to fight me (i was a regular, so they threw him out from the bar and let me stay)
>at this point so wasted so i think im the greatest fighter in the world (with zero experience) so I'm like fuck it, lets go
>so i go out, tell the bouncer, "do you mind if i fuck him up a bit?"
>bouncer just laughs and says "go ahead, just take it easy"
>so i go out and the douchebag rushes at me, but i manage to lift my knee into his stomach so he bends over a bit
>squeeze his head between my legs, grab his legs around his back and pike drive him head first into the ground
>turn him over and start beating his chest and slapping his face, cause I didn't want to punch his face in case i'd knock out some teeth and would be liable for that shit
>the bouncer comes and picks me up off of him and pulls be back to the bar "nice job, now get a beer and chill out inside"
>literally get thrown into the bar for fighting kek
>all my friends inside roaring with cheers and laughters for me

Was a funny experience at the time, but stupid dangerous to pile drive him, he could have broken his neck and died.
Nowadays I'm good at just diffusing the situation before escalation like that. But this douchebag apparently was going every other week to bars just to pick a fight, so I'm lucky I "won".
I was 195cm ~85kg then
>friend trying to show me some stupid kung fu shit he learned a few days ago while I'm practicing jabs and straights into the heavy bag at the gym
>he tries to tell me that parrying blows isn't good as it hurts your arm
>he tried to show me their block they learn, that retarded wax on wax off shit
>so I do it, but parry and force his hand away, slowly at like 30% speed
>the I say "and now I go and do this" and do a slow punch towards his exposed jaw
>he goes full speed and tries to elbow my stomach and throw an uppercut
>me being the only one with gloves on, I jab him in the face and body shot the ribs
>"why'd you go full speed bro"
>have to drop gloves and do some deadlifts because I was furious at how much of a faggot he was being

If there's one thing I can't stand, it's people who are blatant hypocrites. I feel you bro.
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These fuckheads..
Fucking always. It's always a stupid manlet that tries to compensate his size by learning some fighting, and then ALWAYS when they want to "show a move" they do it full power and speed.

I have a friend like this now, he's a fucking flabby idiot that trains boxing now a few times per month with some aerobic girl trainer, and hes always telling me "now i can beat you up ahaha" i just look at him like "stop your bullshit" then his way to show me his "boxing skills" was to slap me in the balls without warning

needless to say i got pissed of, threw him on the ground and force punched his dick 10 times and told him to never fucking do it again.

A few weeks later similar conversation, i just laugh at him again, and he fucking kicks me in the ass from behind when I'm walking away (lightly, but enough to hurt a bit).
This time i just look him in the eye and calmly explain to him what cheap shots and nut shots and cowardice is, and tell him that people who do that have no honor, and if you ever try to fight me, i wont fight clean either. And next time i will actually fuck him up.

Hasn't done it since.

>fucking manlets
/fit/ I have my first amateur kickboxing bout in one week, scooby pls preserve me
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Reading these makes me so glad I live in an actual first world country. I have no idea how a beta fuck like me would survive somewhere like America.
With a gun
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My mate doesn't even commit to any of this fucking shit either. He'll do it for a few weeks and then either give up, give some excuses as to why he can't turn up, or juck off and do something else.

He made me get a membership at his gym which is 3km away from my place, so we could go to gym together often, and he doesn't even fucking go any more than once a fortnight.

I coudl have signed up for a cheaper gym a 2 min walk down the road, but he had to be a shitty cunt and guilt me into signing up for an expensive shitty gym. Mad as fuck.

And then he does this stupid shit with showing me "moves" all the time. Did his security license, learned a few restraining moves, tried them out on me and went full force straight away. Not that it did anything as I have half a heads height on him and those moves are designed to lock down arms and elbows, and I could simply just push back.

>mfw he says "come on anon you're fighting back bro"
>I tell him "yeah so would anybody else you use this stupid shit on, learn some boxing and MMA instead"
>mfw he says "nah you just need to lock their elbows and make them submit"
> I'm a Mexican

I hate you for being alive.
You can probably cancel your gym membership and get some of your money back if you tell them that you are moving out of the city/country. They wont bother with much proof. Might want to try that and go to your closer gym.
Fuck that guy.
The worst part?

When we do go, I do squats, deadlifts and bench press, as I'm mostly following SS as a sort of skinnyfat DYEL faggot.

He can't follow my form for anything except bench, and he literally only does leg press, bench press, dumbell curls and a few half hearted lat pulldowns.

>mfw we first started going and he could lift slightly more weight than I could and said something along the lines of him being stronger than me and making a sort of snarky comment about him always going to be stronger
>hit the gym 3 times a week when he only hits it once a month at most
>next time we go together, I'm outbenching him by 10kg, out-curling him by 2-4kg and beating him on leg press by 20kg, as well as being able to do squats and deadlifts which he apparently can't because "muh genetics", so I tell him to do some calisthenics that help put the muscles back into healthy shape and form so he can properly do it and he says "nah i'm fine with how I am right now"
>mfw I tell him "I can lift way more than you now man" and he says "that's because you go more often than me and I'm tired and bruised from kung fu training"

He's a bit of a joke most times but he's been a great friend over the years and kept me fed, clothed and sheltered for 3 months while I was broke and kicked out of home.
i did that and win !..with a peper spay and a tire wrench ^^
>junior year hs
>freshman faggot kid stabs me with pencil
>follow him to bathroom
>slam his head on urinal.
>pee on him
Eh, some people are like that. They need to always think they are the best, and have their excuses for everything.

It is fun to aggressively call them out on bs like that sometimes though. Like when he gives an excuse, you point out how stupid that is. "Of course I'm stronger because I train more, that's how everything works. friendo! but good luck ever catching up to me anymore with your shitty motivation and self discipline" and then go back to being friendly. Stuff like that makes them think about it all day, without you being too much of an asshole.

I like to fuck with self-loving friends on a psychological level like that.
Only been in one fight and it was like a crew brawl I guess you could say.
>be me, 16
>be my enemy fuckin douche of a guy sits in back of bus
>loud mouth mother fucker
>Tell him to finally stfu and who my brother was
>older brother use to run the neighborhood lmao
>he kinda flinched with snapping back but he still did
>"meet me at the trails then anon"
>call some buddies, buddies called their buddies just in case
>good thing I fucking called back up cause they set up what had look like a fuckin ambush at the trails
>fight the kid, beat him
>no knock out
>was a headlock "you done?" Type of ending haha
>Yeah anon
>His friends start talking shit to mine
>they fight
>the back of the bus kid tries to sneak me
>dodge punch
>hit him again draw blood
>he notices says "o fuk"
>goes down like monster in parasite eve in the cafe scene.
>His friends pick him up and leave
>I sat in the back of the bus from then on.

>4 years later
>im sitting at my wage cuck construction job posting on 4chan thru mobile
>have a gf of 5 years
>decent gains made
>have braces

He won the war...
is this /asp/ copy pasta?
Yeah, he's a decent friend just needs a kick up the ass. Like I did. Ex GF os 4 years left me because I couldn't handle money and was a lazy cunt.

Now i'm self concious, eating right, listing weights, and starting to lose my beta outlook on life and only caring for myself and people who have proven that they can be trusted with my loyalty.

Aside from that, anybody on /fit/ recommend a decent style of fighting to learn to take out some aggression and work up a sweat? Thinking of going along to a boxing gym but boxing feels pretty boring, nothing but punches. Not many MMA gyms around, they're mostly "family oriented", which almost always means little to no contact and it's all about how you feel, not how you perform.

considering doing BJJ but it's all grappling, no striking.

Tbh, grappling seems a bit weird, but everybody i know who started it, keep recommending it.

One friend started with BJJ, and now considers to train a bit of boxing on the side to also get the punching right.
Blaha pls stop
I started out a few years ago learning some Aikido/judo/BJJ groundwork with guys that had 50+kg on me and had some fun with that, but I wanna spar with strikes and mix it up. I hate rigid disciplines.

Will definitely give it a go if I can't find anything else around though. Nothing like getting somebody into a naked choke or an arm bar.
this is alpha
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>nah i'm fine with how I am right now
M80 you'd better get away from that nigga
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You watch too many movies, a bottle works better as a blunt weapon if you don't break it.
Old pasta.
That is my favorite Simpsons reference.
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