Who else here has shitty parents?
>come home from gym, rough workout
>mother immediately on my case, asking why I didn't take out the garbage
>tell her I was at the fucking gym, she knows my schedule
>I always get her to make me a post workout meal and she didn't cook anything
>I call her out, she says I can make my own food
>throw chalk in her face and leave house for an hour
Just got back, haven't seen the cunt yet, fuck I hate her
I feel you OP
>be me working out in my home gym I got for birthday last year
>mom yells at me because I didn't flush the toilet
>she knows not to disturb while I'm working out
>I call her a bitch and say I forgot and it wasn't a big deal
>she tells me to get a job and to quit being such a mooching faggot
>then I kill myself
Let me get this straight, either you can't tell bait from sincere posts, or you feel some need to reply to it even though you know it's fake.
What is wrong with you? Are you 8 years old?
>come home from gym, rough workout
>go to the fridge for my chocolate milk for GOMAD
>its all gone
>I have to roll around on the floor throwing a tantrum for a goddamn half hour before mom goes and buys more
>tantrums count as cardio so I lost all my gains anyway
seriously can you believe this shit
>get home from gym
>mom asks me how it went
>didn't break PR
>it's ok sweetie try again next time, want a muffin?
>she knows I only like poppyseed
>she's trying to kill my gains with chocolate
>throw muffin in her face and storm upstairs
>haven't spoken to her since
CAN YOU FUCKING BELIEVE IT, FUCKING CHOCOLATE
>come home from gym, tough workout
>mommy says she steamed me some brussel sprout
>I don't like brussel sprout
>she knows that but she made them anyway
>I get upset and smash the plate against the wall and run away
>lose all my gains from that cardio
Seriously what the fuck is wrong with her
> Move out of my parents' house because I'm not a failure.
> Go to the gym, come home
> Take out the garbage and make my own food also clean up some
> Go to sleep at a reasonable hour because I have work tomorrow
>work 8 hours
>sit in traffic for another hour
>house destroyed. Cheeto bags everywhere
>fedoras and gamer fuel litter living room floor
>autistic bastard son barges in
>ask him to take out the trash
>has steroid fueled meltdown
>asks me to make him tendies
>tell him that I didn't have a chance to go shopping
>becomes even more irate
>takes baby powder out of his pockets and begins throwing it around the kitchen
>keeps saying "C'Mon"
>squats down, acts like he's trying to grab something
>ask him what he's doing
>calls me a "normally cunt"
>runs to basement
>all I hear is furious typing
>wish I would have had an abortion
>because I have work tomorrow
Hey everybody, look at this faggot.
Isn't it past your bedtime? Better make some money so that Tyrone has a big bed to fuck your wife in.
>relate cus of shitty parents
>go hme after 2 hour workout
>hands me shaker with double choco whey
>goes to kiss cheek
>slips and makes out with mom
>slips and dicks mom
>proceed and cardio for 20 minutes
hate them so much
>Come home from gym, tough workout.
>Go to get my eggs from the fridge so I can have the whites as post-workout
>My Mom is making a cake in there
>She better fucking not have
>MY EGGS ARE FUCKING GONE
>Slam refrigerator while grunting like a bear to show how mad I am
>Ask her where my motherfucking eggs are
>She says she used the last of them to make a cake for my stupid fucking sister's 10th birthday
>throw the cake tin at her stupid fucking head
>Trip over in my Vibram Fivefingers as I charge upstairs to my sister's room.
>Slam the door open and scream that she should get her own god damned eggs if she wants a shitty cake next time
>starts crying like a fucking little 10 year old or something.
>Mom is crying too and phoning my dad saying I'm out of control again.
>Ended up eating 300 calories below my 5000 calorie target for that day because of this shit.
>come home from gym
>mom tells me I have a nice pump
>high testosterone state causes me to say "you have a nice ass"
>we start kissing
>grab her nice ass
>proceed to fuck mom
>dad walks in, tells me it's real nigga hours and it's his turn
>leave the room and go to sleep
>Was anorexic years ago so I start lifting and get decent gains and I got rid of anorexia
>Mom: "Didn't know I had a son, you don't even have boobs now and you look ugly with all that muscle"
>"I have bigger boobs than you, I bet you when you competed in bikini and I enter I would win since I have better boobs and feminine body"
>"You're anorexic again because you don't eat the foods that we are eating"
>"Hey clean up the toilet bowl, nobody in this house isn't anorexic but you"
>"Your father told me that you're the perfect example of a female body type that he would never sleep with"
>"You do know that no one will want you if you're looking like that right, men likes feminine body, not a manly body like yours. Stop lifting weights
>Me:"Dad I heard that you got a gym membership, I know a good workout routine that you might be interested"
>Dad:"You used to be anorexic. I'll go ask a personal trainer for that question"
>Dad I'm bulking and I gained from 124lbs to 140lbs you know that, I'm not anorexic anymore
>dad shuts the door
>6 months into lifting and chill
>dad starts getting envious
>keeps pointing out anything he does better than me
lol k idc honestly, I might lift now but im still just some weeb who plays games
>get home from workout
>mum forgot to buy me another fucking shake
>call her out for the cunt she is
>go to my room
>bitch comes in with fickong muffins she baked to make me forgive her
>would have blown my TDEE
Why are parents such gains goblins?
>Dad sees my supplement bags while I am in the kitchen preparing food and a drink
>"Son this creatine is very unhealthy and it is doping, I want you to stop this."
>Proceeds to tell me about how unhealthy that while smoking his cigarette and coughing from it
>Start laughing plainly right Into his face for a good five Minutes until He realises how much bullshit He is saying
That old pal
This is about ironic shitposting Cheekie, not true stories.