THE ULTIMATE GAINS KILLER I have had little babies in my house

>>35737883
the mom gave up her body to have that kid, so you do too. Have fun not making it.

>>35737883
You done goofed.

Should've dated men, faggot

>>35737883
Earplugs. Sleep in shifts with the whore who cucked you with the mailman so that you both get adequate sleep.

>>35737883
melatonin

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>>35737883
Take them to the gym to lift with you for dem baby gains, they will be so tired they'll pass out at night, they'll leave humanity behind by the age of 10

>>35737883
Wow I feel bad for your kids having such a pussy father

>>35737918
This desu

I'm not gay or anything but dating a man is so much more practical.

>always dtf
>best gym bro ever
>fit guys are much hotter then fit girls
>post workout "cardio" ;)
>no pregnancy
>no idiotic women draining your wallet
>no woman = no stress

No homo of course

>>35737883


Babies are the ultimate workout equipment. They don't stop growing until they're 20.

>feed babies
>lift
>as you become stronger babies gain more weight
>curl baby
>after 20 years baby will be around 160 pounds
>grats on curling 160 pounds

>>35739100
dubs don't lie

>>35739107

i know

>>35737883
You dumb shit. You fucked up in the worst way possible: YOU REPRODUCED.

You want advice? Here it is: YOUR LIFE IS OVER. You must now focus ALL your efforts on raising your spawn to be healthy, productive, well-adjusted members of society. ANYTHING YOU WANT has to come LAST, THEY come FIRST, and there is NOTHING you can do to escape it except to DIE. You run away from it, they track you down and make you PAY.

Enjoy getting fat, weak, and diseased. Evolution is done with you and doesn't care what happens to you now.

>>35739261
><3██CUTE=TOMATO██<3
kill yourself

>>35739050
Fuck you, stop taunting us with your false promises, you can't make yourself homo, I tired, but nothing worked.

If this was 1830 American south, then us straights are the nigger slaves bound to our white women masters, and you freedmen are the damn niggers who come back to the south just to comment to us "jee, you really ought try this freedom thing, it's great"

>>35739274
If I can help the survival of my spawn then I will be more successful so being fit will only benefit my offspring. So your words are dumb and you are stupid and clearly don't know shit about Darwin

Serious question though could you absorb another man's semen through your butt somehow and thereby obtain gains?

>>35739261
You are insufferable as fuck.

>>35739100
actually you are right.
I let my 5year old daughter sit on my shoulders for weighted push ups for example. I get extra weight and she has fun. it's a win win.

>>35739384
>Implying natural selection still matters to humans

We have escaped that curse anon. Babies are meant to be grown in labs while individuals focus on personal achievement. good luck with your no money and no fun.

>>35739274
are you 12?

raising a child is the only thing that matters in your life.

your bloodline will end with you, enjoy being forgotten 5 min after you die.

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>>35738113
My gym actually has a daycare just for that purpose. Dump babbies (maybe they'll lvl up), lift, collect babbies and go home. You just converted your daddy time to gym time.

>>35737883
eat babies for extra gains

problem solved.

>>35739100
if my kid legit weighs 160 pounds at 20 i will disown him.

>>35737883
Spreading your seed further than the average man is the goal.

You've already made it.

>>35740227
Could become awkward when she's 16.

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>>35739384
>If I can help the survival of my spawn then I will be more successful

No. It doesnt work like that. The genes you propogate in "your" offspring are not strictly yours. They do not represent you, it is the other way around, you are phenotypic representation of them. These tiny little tyrants sitting in the nucleus of your every cell are making YOU do THEIR bidding by reproducing them.You are just a vessel, a throwaway limited-use tool to be discarded in order for the immortals (genes) to continue existing. You dont really owe your genes anything brah, they are merely using you.

>>35740839
mind blown

>>35740838
why? she will weight around 100 - 120lb then, that is some nice extra weight for push ups.

>>35740839
Woah

Jesus christ why would anyone get kids?

>>35740860
I didn't say impossible, I said awkward.
Besides, who knows? She might weigh 250 lbs by then.

>>35739050
>No homo, of course

I fucking love this board

>>35737883
>What dooooo

Use a condom.

>>35737883
http://www.amazon.com/Bose-QuietComfort-Acoustic-Cancelling-Headphones/dp/B00M1NEUKK

http://www.cheap-batteries.com/mm5/merchant.mvc?Screen=BASK

>>35741754
Put on some really soft Nora Jones and you won't hear shit. Good luck.

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>>35737883
WHAT EVER YOU DO, DON'T HOLD THE BABY!!!! It's been scientifically shown that a man who holds a baby has his test lowered by the little gains goblin.

>>35743185

SHOO SHOO BABY

What are the benefits of having kids? If you aren't independently wealthy you're just raising slaves.

>>35739274
>ANYTHING YOU WANT has to come LAST, THEY come FIRST, and there is NOTHING you can do to escape it except to DIE.

This is exactly the attitude that makes nasty, entitled kids who no one likes. I'm glad you're not having kids because you would suck at it.

Having kids is outdated and gay. At best you're cleaning up shit, at worst you're a cuck paying "child support" while your wife fucks other men.

Literally no benefits at all.

>>35743248

Possible benefits? Using you and your partner's knowledge and experience to guide a new person through life. And to create a better person so that your ideas can permeate into the future and make a better life for everyone.

Reality? There are no benefits. Even people worried about preserving their "legacy" will be forgotten in 3 generations.

>>35743248
For pedos there are some benefits. But this is usually frowned upon.

>>35743382
>For pedos there are some benefits. But this is usually frowned upon.
kek

>>35737883
>he fell for the procreation meme

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>>35741212
>I didn't say impossible, I said awkward.
it's more common then you think

>Besides, who knows? She might weigh 250 lbs by then.
even better for my gainz

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>not glueing random childs to your body for extra weight

>making it

choose one

>>35744701
>can't even train without being swarmed by infants
>making it

choose one

>>35737883
Iktfb, i have a 3 yo daughter.
Children kill gains but as soon as they get to school you'll be back on track.

>>35737883
>>35744756
Idiots

>>35744756
>daughter
I'm sorry. Not because you had a girl, but because of what's going to happen about 10 years from now.

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>>35739050

>'m not gay or anything

>>35737883
Sell them to asain traffickers for protein powder

>>35745460
>sexist
>pervert
Get outta here