4chan, I have a confession to make. I may face repercussions for letting this out, but I figure you have the right to know.
The reason updates have been so slow lately is because I am part of a top-secret multinational agency called the Bastet Inititive.
It started in England about 70 years ago, with a man named Jimmy Crighton. He was a cartoonist who discovered, via a series of would-be-fatal auto accidents, that he could not sustain injuries in any form. A strong patriot and fan of adventure, he passed up the opportunity to become a scientific marvel and instead chose to work for the English government, undertaking off-the-books jobs. Nobody could figure out where his invincibility stemmed from until 1962, when he left his cartooning job to work full-time as a MI6 agent. He was promptly crippled by a bullet and forced into retirement on his first day.
That's how they learned the true source of his invincibility: his cat comic. After a series of attempted (and sometimes successful) assassinations on cat comic authors, it was confirmed that any individual who drew a comic starring an anthropomorphic cat was effectively impervious to physical harm. However, if they ever gave up on the comic, or began drawing it solely for power and not from a love of cat comics, their invulnerability would vanish.
They didn't know where the power came from. Government scientists theorized it was perhaps once associated with the Egyptian goddess of protection, Bastet, and perhaps the mechanism by which pharaohs became regarded as gods, but it was impossible to know if Bastet was the cause or merely one culture's interpretation. Whatever the power's origin, it meant one simple thing: they needed to find and recruit people who drew cat comics by choice.
>>78989226 Agent work takes up a lot of time. As some of the youngest members, I think they work me, Scott, Samantha, and Tracy a little harder than the rest. Maybe they fear something big is coming, and want to train us as best they can. Or, maybe they know that, as internet people, our love of cats is unparalleled and we'll never lose our invincibility.
I guess that's one of the scarier parts: the fallen agents. Jim Davis was one; he used to the BI's top agent, nipping countless international conflicts in the bud, until his cat comics turned soulless and empty, drawn only to maintain his invincibility and thus causing him to lose it. Ever since then he's been trying to get it back, drawing his empty comics vigorously while building an international underground crime network dedicated to finding any information they can about the powers and their cause.
And then there's Gallagher. He never lose his powers, but after just a few missions he lost his mind. His cat comics got unusual and incomprehensible, and then one day he just stopped responding to BI's contact attempts. We still run across him on missions sometimes, working toward his own mysterious goals, but any attempt to apprehend him simply ends with him vanishing. Tracy thinks he has unearthly abilities far beyond his invincibility, but I don't buy it. Though, I swear he once knocked down a brick wall with nothing but a helmet with "HAM" scrawled across the front.
At the end of the day, though, it's not my job to speculate. I just need to draw cat comics and follow orders. I am confident the Bastet Initiative is working toward a better world, and isn't some super cliche conspiracy that we'll eventually end up turning on.
I've been building my boxfort for about 15 hours I think, last night I slept in it. The tapestries can make for a surprisingly warm blanket if you stack enough of them on you. Also one of you is getting a shirt with my drool, I hope that's okay.
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