Al/ck/

De Smirnoffbro died

hes gone?
F
ill pour a water on the ground for him

>>9157578
Who?

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>>9157600
A fallen soldier
>>9157583
>>9157596

See >>9156315

>>9157607
F

I still hope he was put in a mental hospital and forcefully tapered off a shitload of benzos and will show up a fresh and new lad desu, but I don't believe in it.

>>9157607
Rip Smirnoffbro. Al/ck/ will remember.

>>9157607
is that what he looked like? i must have missed the thread where he posted a face pic.

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>>9157629
I missed it too but they were reposted in the previous thread

>>9157578
Brahhhh that nigga shoulda just maned up and took a couple of shots, the fuck wrong with niggas these days. People think they so hard cuz they are apparently al/ck/s when they cant even handle alcohol.

thread theme

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=h1nQ2bncchs&index=29&list=PL921FC85ED95A930F

Should I kill myself?

>>9157746
Nah. Drink some water

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>>9157746
When in doubt, procrastinate.

at first i thought u guys were talkin about the guy that famously chugged entire bottles of everclear/vodka/whatever at once. i've never seen this guy before i come here all the time dafuq

3 months clean, then suddenly got a really big craving to get drunk and bought a bottle of vodka.

I think its because I had a meetup with a couple friends last week and it reminded me how much of a loser i am

>>9157820
It's gonna be OK Anon. It's gonna be OK.
Don't let a mishap ruin your sobriety.
Pour the bottle down the sink, get back on the wagon asap. The sooner the better.

feelio drinking white wine and vomit is red

>>9157900
i dont think i can, once i bought the bottle i pretty much committed to the drinking

>>9157578
Good, what a faggot.

>>9157900
thanks for the words tho, it helps

I've reasoned that getting off the hard stuff was the first step. I do quite well at not buying it anymore. Where are you bros at?

>>9157983
33 days sober

I feel more depressed than ever but I'm not going back

who here on the wine?

I'm reminiscing with a childhood friend but regretting my uni course decision now I've graduated and can't find a job. really can't go back to retail or service work and considering suicide.

>>9157983

Did that for like 2 years and it kinda worked out, I mean I still drank all the time and didn't accomplish shit, but I didn't die or end up in the hospital and/or jail, which is what happened when I stopped giving a fuck and went back to drinking anything.

>>9157990

Nice

>>9157978
did you do it? did you take a drink?

>>9157974
Can you pour it before going to bed, so you're not tempted to drink in the morning?

I've been in therapy and it's not helping. Seeing a psychiatrist tomorrow though, wish me luck

>>9157990
Keep it up buddy. That's the attitude.

>>9158073
Good luck anon

>>9157983
48 hours sober

I cant even have a cup of tea or a smoke without thinking I'm gonna die. I wish I had blood thinking meds or some shit.

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Bought 2 40s today after work but before class. While waiting, I sat on on a public toilet for over an hour with never ending constipation shits and jerked off. At least I'm convinced alcohol turns me retarded so I'm convinced i should stop.

Literally the best music ever made https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=_2ZmFyt5n0M

Someone give me a quick rundown on Smirnoffbro. I've lurked these threads but not all the time. I've heard of the guy. Someone just post a bio or something. Does he have any family or friends?

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>tfw just laughed out loud at a daily mail caption regarding don draper's alcoholism

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is physical dependency real or just a myth

>>9158239
It's very real.

Alcohol withdrawals can literally kill you.

Anyone else feel so hopeless you turn to hymns of a lord you don't believe in and cry when you're drinking to feel ease from WDs and feel thankful

I do
https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=phGDR9y912s

>>9157983
wise choice, keeping a maintenance dose and tapering is much easier with pisswater that's hard to over indulge on by sheer volume.

i tapered vodka and then switched to beer in the end and am now 15 days sober. feels healthy and relatively happy compared to being in perpetual hangover or sloppy mode.

being completely sober for such a long stretch of time feels eerie though. might have to pick up meditation or weed or at least something that is not the sheer banality of conventional consciousness.

>>9158239
it's the realest thing there is.

nice weredog

>>9158010
Wine and beer are better than liquor in terms of not being crazy

>>9158245
Yes, the concept of a maintenance dose is something I should have included in my own post. While you may not get drunk off of pisswater, your body still recognizes the alcohol, which is crucial.

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Did /co/ get some Zima while it's back? Shit makes me super thirsty

>>9158398
Fuck, /ck/, imma faggot.

>>9157583
>>9157596
Someone spotted his face in the obituaries.

Ive been browsing al/ck as long as I can remember
I don't even drink

>>9158154
5 bottles of 75cl Smirnoff a day. just use jewgle and google 'smirnoffbro' and 4chan and you'll probably find something in the archives.

>>9158405
where did they post about it?

I relapsed this weekend and cannot see in one eye due to losing contacts... thought it was the end honestly at my job but I soldiered through. I was going to go check out a 247 petrol station because apparently they sell alcohol all the time there...I walked 2 minutes in the direction of it and then made myself turn around and just go home..just got done watching wwe, gonna go bed. I have earned a bit of respect for myself.

To anyone who has relapsed, thinking of doing so...or anything similar, just know it's not the end and starting from scratch is very possible.

Love you all

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Bought a bottle of this today. Is rum suposed to taste like this, or is it just because I bought cheap shit?

>>9158703
thats literal garbage. if you want black rum and wanna ease into it just get Kraken next time

>>9157607
>>9157641
He's good looking. How does this happen? At least my excuse is that I look like a real life goblin.

>>9158703
Bacardi is trash.

>>9158790
Kraken is overly-alcohol bitter trash.

>>9158128
Sounds like a wholesome double life you live

>>9158808
What's some decent cheap dark rum then?

>>9158498
What you did is not easy. Well done.

>>9158801
Looks are just one part of a person it's easy to be miserable despite goodlooks. Some people dont give a shit about dating and relationships. Also u see tons of happy, ugly people.

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>>9158829
Aye, a lot of celebrities who end up ODing or an hero are good looking.

>>9158829
I'll agree with this. Al/ck/oholism is more of an escape from life, like it is with other substances.

>>9158819
Not him but sailor Jerry ain't too bad

I've been to a lot of dark places on the internet and none are more fucking depressing than these al/ck/ threads

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>>9158975
were the center of the internet
if there is a hell this is it

>>9158703

my wife got that one as a gift from her father, i guess he fucking hates her guts as awful that shit is

RIP Smirnoffbro
Like ships passing in the night.

>>9158975
Everybody needs friends.

>>9158975
Watching people exaggerate their "addiction" and pretend they're so hard done by is funny.

Just smoked a cigar for the first time in my life. I spent about an hour smoking it and the effect was like a weak coffee or a cup of tea.

The tobacco meme is a joke.

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>>9159100
>could really go for a nice cup of tea right now
>mommy is still sleeping and I don't want to disturb her

>tfw borderline alcoholism

there is a fine line I'm tiptoeing right now and I don't know which way I'm gonna fall off.

>>9159100
you dont inhale cigars. it is "for the taste".

my best friend and one of only two of my al/ck/-level drinking bros is in rehab atm getting tapered off benzos and alcohol (he was doing 4-6mg xan a day along with a serious drinking habit).

i pour one out for him.

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>>9157578
>RIP SmirnoffBro edition
F
He posted this a while back with the caption "happier times"

Poor bloke

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>>9159125
He's one of the lucky ones. No joke, I've been in full DTs five times and once resorted to staving them off with antiseptic mouthwash. That's how fucked I was.

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>>9157600
He got his name for a reason

>>9159334
Used to be me before I quit. Don't miss it

>>9159334
that pic is nothing

wish i would've taken a pic of the bottles i threw out earlier today. literally 20ish plastic handles of bottom shelf vodka from the past 2 weeks

>>9159352
>>9159368
How do you function like that? At my very worst I was on a bottle a day and that was hell. Just about managed to keep myself together during the day but felt awful all the time. I can't imagine drinking more than that. How did you feel during these times? Genuinely curious

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Drunk at 2:31am and haven't slept since more than that time yesterday. Oh well~! Red Stag was 5.99. 6 bucks for a 5th of jim beam, damn that's not fair.

>>9159061
yeah especially funny when the people who almost die and get to hospital.
like just stop exaggerating lmao

>The good beers never have 6-pack packaging

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6 days sober, thank god. I drove about 150 miles round trip with a friend to the casino (bad idea). I spent about 6 hours gambling and didn't have a single drink tho! Only lost $50 too which is well worth 6 hours of fun. Could not be more proud of myself

>>9159375
At first, fine. Then everything goes downhill. Fortunately for me, I had other health problems that caused me to stop before any alcohol-related damage occurred

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We're all soon going to be dead. Fucking hell what should we do? This is not living, merely surviving

>Can literally have home delivery for drugs
>No home delivery for alcohol

I don't understand this

>>9159513
>No home delivery for alcohol

I disagree

>>9159513
I get it delivered by a shop owner, a supermarket and a restaurant.

>>9159516
>>9159521
Fuck me, do they add extra costs to it? I've never heard of that shit in my country

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Do we have confirmation that smirnoffbro is kill? :(

>>9159522
It costs a fortune, yup.

>>9159525
>£13.79

fuck me, where the hell was he getting that

Howdo I stop hiccuping lads

>>9159525
It's not confirmed but the last post I saw from him was literally him saying he could feel he was dying and had hours/days left.
I think we have to assume he's gone. Poor bastard.

>>9159529
Drink more rapidly for a short period

>>9159529
There is no way. Infuriating isn't it?
Ever hiccuped, sneezed and thrown up at near enough the same time?

>>9159532
This actually worked. Cheers.

>>9159529
punch your stomach and upper chest a few times

>>9159528
im gonna guess its cheap where you live? 750ml? here in texas smirnoff would average about that much in USD i think. personally hate the stuff. way too harsh imo.

>>9159545
I'm British, a litre of whisky costs 16-17 quid

>>9159528
Paki shop probably, asda usually sell it for 12 quid. Did he ever say how he managed to afford a habit like that? 5 of them is almost 70 quid a day.
>>9159531
Poor guy, I enjoyed his posts. Thought he was going to make it last time he got sober

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If there are any ausfags in the thread I have discovered the nectar of the gods. It's 8 bucks a bottle which is twice the cost of riverside landing or critterden wine but just as much alcohol and it tastes fucking delicious.

It's the perfect balance between cheap, alcoholic and tasty.

>>9159581

It's full of sugar and a 1.25L bottle is only 8 standard drinks, id rather buy a bottle of red wine for that price

>>9159549
How much for three tyres of whisky?

I did some very stupid shit tonight
forgive me al/ck/

>>9159594
Well you're (presumably) not in hospital or jail, how bad could it have been?

>>9159594
al/ck/ forgives you

your penance is four shots of Smirnoff in honour of our fallen comrade

>>9159594
>I did some very stupid shit tonight
The story of my everyday life

>>9159594
What kind of stupid shit?

>>9159618
got really drunk and had an argument with my mom
the whole thing was fucking stupid

>>9159589
Except it's easy to skull and tastes 100 times better than fucking cleanskin or some shit like that.

>>9159625
So why are you asking our forgiveness and not hers?

>>9159635
I did ask her that and she told me I need to seek counseling and I agreed

>>9159646
Sounds like a reasonable conclusion to this argument.

>>9159625
I've physically harmed my mother while blacked out. One time and it was extremely minor, but that's hardly the point. I legitimately almost slit my wrist when I found out. Changed my life forever. Begged and pleaded with a doctor to explain to her what blackouts are like and not knowing what else to do, took out a loan and showered her with constant gifts and apologies. It's honest to god something that has been on my mind to some extent every second of my life since I did it.
Cool. Now I feel extremely sick.

>>9159672
physically?

>>9159697
Pushed her and she fell on the floor. She's in her 70's.

I'm a week sober and early this morning I suddenly jolted awake in a panic because I thought I was waking up for work still drunk from the night before. Took me a couple minutes to realize that I hadn't had any drinks in the last week. Felt relieved but also kinda bothered

>>9159625
Did you suplex her for getting in your way?

>>9159701
>She's in her 70's

Jesus anon, how old are you

>>9159701

You're scum mate. If that isn't enough to make you quit straight away, you deserve to rot.

>>9159791
I don't know the details
>>9159793
I'm 34
>>9159795
I did, then I had a seizure so I started again.

>>9159796

Then drink enough to taper off, then quit. Or keep making excuses and beat your mum again, whatever.

>>9159741
What the fuck I am starting to do the exact same thing but only since a relapse. I am sober but wake up and this I'm at work and think my bed is a bus I must clean or some shit. It's annoying as fuck... it's probably just stress but it makes no logical sense.

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>>9157578
Just got woken up in the middle of the night. Cousin killed himself. This coming just after last month's suicide attempt, where my brother and I visited him 3 times a week, bringing in booze, bud oil, and food to play cards.

When he got out, we went to my dad's who makes the best burgers, had a few drinks, and played video games. This was the beginning of July.

Just saw him on Satudray to hook his 19 year old ass up with some jew wine before a party. The day before that he was fishing with friends. Just yesterday, we were going to play some CoD online, but he called it off at the last minute to go hang out with some of his friends.

Now he was found with an exit bag over his head in the parking lot of a fucking grocery store.


Was told at 4am, and couldn't get back to sleep.
I think I'm going to take off work and drink today..

>>9159859
Jesus man that is really rough, sound like you did all that you could though. Hope you are ok man

>>9159273
He was a good looking lad but it's like you can see the pain already.

>>9159421
Good job m8, you went into the belly of the beast and came out unsullied.

Thansk to elederly mum shoving anon for reminding me why I'm sober. Just poured out my emergency stash (already tapered so I don't physically need it, just mentally).

>>9159816
Definitely stress playing a part, plus the memories of many mornings waking up starting to go through minor withdrawals

>>9159906
27 days sober. Still in the hospital but feeling just fine. Belgian waffle, turkey "bacon," hot tea with orange slices, OJ,milk, brotein drink.

Today I get to test my new pain meds against physical therapy but at least there's no dialysis.

I hope Smirnoffbro is alive

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>>9159955
Forgot pic

I need help alko's, what armaretto is good?

>>9159955
Glad to hear you are on the mend mate. Any idea when you will get out?

>>9159961
Looks good Simpsonbro. (Assuming that's you?)
Eat up, dude. My meals for the last two days have consisted of:

Half a tinned peach.

I then immediately threw up.

Feel better, anon. You've done the hard bit. Never again impose this nightmare upon your life.

>>9159964
No alcohol is "good" by any stretch of the English language. Worries me sometimes when young people come into these threads apparently enthusiastically trying to impose this filth on themselves. Don't wish to sound disrespectful but this Isn't a game, anon. It is no fun being poisoned 24/7.

>>9159964
Like >>9159989 said, this is a thread for those who are in too deep. If you are looking for booze advice head over to a drinking thread. You occasionally see them on here or /r9k/

Mall drinker here

9 days sober. Had to go to the mental hospital for a few days of follow up for diazepam for withdrawal. Feeling so much better. Getting a Dr for anti depressants. I don't wanna go back to drinking. Gotta go back to the mental hospital today for alcohol therapy. Excited. I don't feel like a zombie. Getting off was hard cause I ditched work for a month long bender. Lost everything so I can only get better from here

I also somehow managed to get engaged.

>>9158239
It's absolutely real.

>>9160019
>engaged
Holy shut dude that's great, or at least, I hope so. If it was some drunken acceptance of a ring to a scary, drunksex entity then if needs be, you can run away and sleep on my couch until her relatives stop trying to stab you.
Stay sober, dude. Relationships while drunk just do not work. I'll have a shot in your honour so you don't have to.

>>9158398
Do you know how long it's going to last? At least another month?
I was born in 89 and never got to taste one, but I remember people talking about that faggoty drink in the 90s all the time.

>>9159967
I'll get out when the doctors call for someone to wheel me out the door. Maybe 7 to 10 days.

>>9159980
Why have you been so sick, are you still drinking?

Is that thread a circlejerk? Are there regulars? Someone explain

>>9160052
>still drinking?
If I go more than 8 hours, symptoms become serious and probably dangerous. I am determined to beat it but I don't know that I can. Time will tell I guess.

>>9160057
There are a number of regulars but most are anon.

>>9158819
Meyers is alright

>>9159494
Honestly at the worst of it I don't even feel like it's even surviving. It's just a pit that goes deeper and deeper and deeper, never stopping unless you die or go to the hospital.
I am thankful to have been sober for a little while now. Last year was one of my worst but I checked myself into a program and still feel at least a little bit different for having done so. I'd be personally worse off without it.

>>9159859
don't take the day off...carry on, it's the best thing you can do. one day will turn into 2, or you'll go into work feeling like shit tomorrow. get past it bro, you'll thank yourself after work is finished.

>>9159625

who hasnt had a arguement with their mother, as long as you didnt beat the shit out of her, enjoy life and stop drinking you piece of shit, DONT FUCK WITH YOUR OWN MOTHER AS LONG SHE DIDNT MOLEST YOU OR GAVE YOUR ASS FOR METH WHEN YOU WERE A CHILD

>>9157578
I've been drinking less and spacing my shots out. Instead of taking a bunch of shots all at once and then passing out, I've been spacing them out so that I can stay awake and actually enjoy the buzz. Still alcoholic level though.

>>9159625
i've acted dumb as fuck with my mother in the past. closest i got to touching her during an argument was banging my head on a door in front of her. she'll forgive you man, if she hasn't already...just look to better yourself and she'll see.

>>9159961
>waffles

Anybody else who just can't eat sweet food anymore? Is it because alcohol is already pure sugar?

>>9160088
I work for a family business. Father at the head. Uncle (father of the cousin who died) works in the field. We were all up late looking for a corpse and dealing with the aftermath, all kind of just taking it easy today.

I'm going to drink, do a little other chemical funzies, and play some video games with my brother and friends.


The gravity will probably hit me a few months down the road, and have a little drunken sob to myself. I handle death usually with lack of emotion. The only thing I really feel right now is slightly dumbstruck.

I'll miss that silly asshole.

>>9160100
I can't - never thought it might be to do with the sauce tho just reckoned I'd gone off sweet things over time

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>>9160019
>engaged
Good for you.

>>9160100
>>9160127
I don't really like sweet food either. I'd take pretty much any burger over my favourite sweet (cheesecake) 100% of the time. i think it could have something to do with that, especially if you drink a lot of cider/cheap wine/mixers.

not really related, but i can make myself gag just by thinking of vodka straight. years of abuse of it has taken it's toll...i guess it's the same with the sugar in some alcohol beverages but to a lesser extent.

>>9158801
One of my best friends from hs was a turbo chad best looking guy in the whole school and most popular and he was a hopeless alcoholic. He was dead before he got to 25.

>>9160095
This is good. At least enjoy it while you can and don't overdo it.

>>9160019
Hey man good to see you back, I was just asking about you in the thread before this one

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>tfw 15 days sober

Feels good. I've become obsessed with sparkly water though. Some part of me seems to consider it something approaching a beverage that regular water is not.

Feels good to replace a booze habit with a mineral water habit though. My piss is beautiful and healthy these days instead of dribbles of rotten egg yoke coloured death.

>>9160179
What mineral water are you snakin' up holmes.

Checking out of rehab and going on 3 weeks sober. Feels pretty good, but I'm on an anti depressant, anxiety med, mood stabilizer, anti craving med and sleep meds, so I'm slightly pilled out. As much as I hate to admit it, AA isn't that bad and people are legit trying to be friendly and helpful, plus my sponsor is a great guy. Gonna miss my drinking days, but sobriety is not horrible.

>>9160194
you have to choose between disguised temporary happiness with the rest being shit, or permanent content with a few genuinely happy moments. at least that's the way i look at it. it's not as black and white as that of course, but i don't think i want to go back to being blissfully ignorant of the state i'm in, but being happy because i'm fucked out my mind, only thinking about the moment and not thinking about how i'm going to function when i wake up.

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>>9160179

Kek, same.

>>9160180

Not him but this is my jam

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>>9160180
This, it's Belgian.

>>9159408
its not "jim beam" its "red stag"

thats like calling old lady walking shoes air jordans just because they both have a nike label

>>9160019
????

>>9160194
congrats. if you ever slip try to get up as fast as you can. its not "all or nothing". people can make mistakes, but dont let it turn into a bender.

>>9160194
"Gonna miss my drinking days" and "pilled out" is kinda scary to me but I have faith in you.

The next to me you start to miss your booze remember the absolute worst shit alcohol did to you. It shouldn't take long to vividly recall 5-10 incidents of highly dangerous, rude or humiliating behavior. Treasure those memories.

Quitting drinking la's

I'm probably going to get sucked back into it eventually. How the hell can I expect to stand on my own two feet when I keep on having random benders which make it impossible for me to function? Scary feeling

>>9160214
>>9160221
I've been sober for a little while now so I might look into these to see how I like them for something different. Haven't really tried to be an actual mineral water drinker before. Thanks for the recs.

>>9160337
The ones with a bit of lemon aroma or something like that are nice as well.

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>>9160276
See a psychiatrist and get on Naltrexone or whatever it's called if you can. Either that or go to AA.

>>9160369
>>9160369
That's a great image. Mind if I save it?

>>9160403
It's a tier 2 reward on my patreon

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>got drunk last night
>grill I really like texted me
>I tried to keep up conversation
>failed
>ended up, texting her a bunch of stupid shit

God fucking damn you alcohol!

>>9159796
>I did, then I had a seizure so I started again.
You need to taper. Or do benzo and taper them.
See a fucking doctor.

>>9159964
The cheapest available at your location.

>>9160180
I like San Pellegrino.

>>9160214
Topo Chico + Deep Eddys = perfect drink to ruin your entire life with. Shit's so good and you don't get a bad hangover so you start thinking it's not that bad for you until you wake up with a cracked head or inside of a nasty latina. (both happened to me off of this concoction, still worried I have AIDS or a baby on the way)

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>tfw we're all gonna make it and al/ck/ will become a water discussion general

>>9160438
I can't drink shit like that. It just reminds me of pouring liquor into it. Gotta be just coffee and water on sober days

i've never wanted to kill myself more than right now

>>9160447
Have some smirnoff

Blog update. Still no contacts come, yet I feel good since fucking up on the weekend. I think them 2 days of your body getting shit back to normal after a weekend binge has stopped.

Bad thing is my energy is still shit and instead of alcohol I'm drinking 2 sugar less red bull at work. A fuck load cheaper than vodka tho I guess.

>>9160449
all i have is manzana

hey bros quick question for yall. im 23 been getting drunk at least once a week since i turned 21 and cant really seem to stop despite being really paranoid about heart problems i (might) have. am i an alcoholic xd?

>>9160447
What's your situation bud? More likely than not, someone here has been in similar situation or in it right now and can give you some advice. For example, I felt that bad for 3 years and only just getting shit back in order.

Use this as a place to vent.

>>9160455
If you're serious... that's not a problem.

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>>9160466
used to have panic attacks that sent me to the hospital when i smoked weed about a year ago but its stuck with me even tho i quit. i just have chest pain a lot near my heart so i tweak out about it.

>>9160457
been getting drunk on an almost daily basis with short failed breaks for the last two years, neet virgin with no friends irl and the only ones i have are part of an online chat group that is currently falling apart
i honestly don't think i could go back to truly being alone, that added to booze would just be too much for my mental sanity, i'd rather end it all
thanks for blog reading

>>9160455
it's not a good habit to keep, you're probably not what people would define as a deseperate alcoholic but if you're getting black-out drunk everytime who knows

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>>9160474
Weed gives me pretty bad anxiety as well, but I still smoke it every now and then. Also get an EKG if you're that worried about your heart.

everyone is advocating sobriety, for me alcohol is an escape to the clusterfuck ive done to my life

i mean i get sober, probably bored as fuck, but my life with work is fucking bullshit

sobriety is not the bigger issue, work is

>>9160479
i get black out drunk a lot compared to most of my friend group. i think its just because im heavier and i have to drink quite a bit to get to that level and then it overwhelms me but idk im not a fucking doctor. i suggest getting a job hommie def made me feel better about myself.

>>9160455
Any behaviour that you're unable to stop (beyond healthy food, water, exercise, sleep) could potentially be said to be an addiction, but it doesn't seem like you're in too deep yet.

You do seem like the kind of guy that has the potential to one day get too deep into it though.

>>9160510
i mean i have stopped for like 2 weeks once. and yeah i would agree that i could potentially become addicted but im far to paranoid for that to happen. ill probably grow out of it like i did weed. was a huge stoner for like 3 years smoked a fuck ton everyday but the panic attacks made me stop.

>>9160494
It would be better to actively seek to change the work situation rather than keep on doing something you hate and dulling the pain poisoning yourself, though.

>>9159961
Pure leaf unsweetened is the shit. Something interesting to sip on whole you try not to drink. Try the one with lemon.

>>9160479
I'm in the same position funnily enough. Gaming clan are the only people I talk to but they're all arguing like retards and disbanding. I only recently stopped drinking and tried really hard for a job and now I have it and am clean. Still no friends outside of the internet since reclusing for years, but at least I'm making some cash now and have the opportunity to go out and chill at a pub or something on the weekend.

My best advice is to just stop. It'll be boring as fuck for s long time but in 2-4 weeks you'll gain a motivation you didn't think you'd get. Your skin and face/body will look better all of a sudden and you'll want to be pro active.

Also, sit out in the sun with just shorts on for 30 mins...I started doing this when I quit drinking and it helped me tremendously. Family didn't even recognise me with a tan and a decent haircut.

Good luck, I know exactly how you feel and the situation in eerily similar. Focus on quitting first and everything else will come together, trust me.

>>9160525
I've never had heart issues until I got addicted to liquor and then trying to quit meant horrible palpitations. Laying in bed at night feeling like you're full on spriting heartwise.

If you're scared of heart stuff booze is not the drug for you.

>>9160571
Also, weed anxiety is nothing compared to withdrawal anxiety.

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I love this stuff

>>9158405
Where?


Post the link


If true, F

It helps me reading these threads. I don't have it as bad as you guys but it's been going on for a long time. I guess I have been drinking almost every day for roughly 9 years. It's not black out drunk every night but I will have a good 6 or 7 shots which makes me feel sort of shitty. It's way worse if it's the weekend or I hang out with people who come over specifically to drink.

Lately I have been getting concerned about certain pain. It feels like my kidneys actually hurt. My heart pounds after eating. I keep trying to start quitting but It feels like I have no will power. At night I will be scared for me life but in the light of day it doesn't seem so bad or I just don't care. I drank only a couple shots last night and so I rewarded myself by drinking 6 this morning.

I don't know man. I fucking hate myself. Anyone got any tips?

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Last night I was smoking on my balcony and I overheard 3 of my neighbors talking about how I'm a crazy drunk and I have mental issues.

Hit me right in the feels, Cried and drank more until dawn.

My liver is already fucked, 3 handles every week for years.

Thinking of building a suicide helmet lads, My life is fucking fucked and a burden on my family

>>9160623
I think that ultimately the pain of going on as you are must be greater than the pain of quitting for any real change to take place.

For me it was both the physical torment of withdrawal and being a cunt to my family that made me change my habits.

Shame was the greatest motivator, I think. I just didn't want to wake up any more worried about what I'd possibly done while black out.

>>9160631
some people would give anything to have their neighbors avoid them

>>9160623
>It feels like my kidneys actually hurt.

Mine too. I also get a high heart rate when I'm just sitting still.

Not overweight, Probably about 15lbs under weight.


I hate myself too, It's a vicious cycle of self hatred and alcohol. I can't stand to look at myself in the mirror sober

>>9160639
I passed my first kidney stone when I was 23 after 2 years of drinking. I have had maybe half a dozen more since

>>9160655
That's crazy, I'm 28 and have been an alcoholic for 7 or 8 years and have never had a kidney stone.


What do you drink? I drink vodka or gin

Are Americans happy with the fact that you cant drink until 21? It's a fucked up thing in my opinion and I would riot if it would have happened in Poland

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>>9160631
go get help dude

there's always therapy and rehab. your life doesn't have to be this way forever

>>9160675
Didn't bother me at all.

It's perfectly legal for a parent to serve their children alcohol, so I had no problem getting beer or whatever when I was younger. You just can't go buy it yourself. But that's not much of an issue since you can always get older friends to get it for you.

I do think it's retarded on a conceptual basis though. At 18 you're old enough to join the military, sign legal contracts, etc, so why not buy booze?

>>9160634
Yeah if anything shame will do it for me. The problem is I became very good at hiding it from almost everyone I know. It sounds fucked up but I don't feel nearly as ashamed if nobody is there to shame me.

>>9160639
Yeah man. The mirror is the worst when I am hung over. Just want to hide from everything.

>>9160655
Jesus man. I've never had one myself but I've known people who have. How much water do you drink?

>>9160710
Shame was a big motivator for me too. I'm 23 and only just getting ny life together...job, sobriety, no real life friends yet.

I still live with my mum, but when I was drinking until black out every single night, and using my small room for bottles,. piss and sick, I don't know how my mum put up with it, but she did and I'm eternally grateful.

I get my first real pay check this Friday...what should I get her?

>>9160775
I'd get flowers. It's more about the gesture anyway and mums love flowers.

>>9160775
Nice man, glad to hear it. My knee jerk reaction was "a better son" but then remember what thread I was in. Aside from drinking and smoking this place may have been the worst influence on me.

Anyway, if there is anything she needs that would be first on my list personally. Helping out with groceries or buying a new X she might need. If not maybe just a card? If it were me I would just be super happy my child improved so much so quickly. I'll bet she's already happy.

>>9160541
Thanks for the advice, the alcohol is killing me but I think seeing the pathetic online social life I had coming to an end is just too much for me
I tend to get attached to strangers in a very stupid way, alcohol not helping
I'm glad to hear you're doing better and I wish you the best, I hope I'll manage like you, loneliness and not having any education aren't motivating me at all, in fact it's killing me inside

>>9159955
> in the hospital
> Belgian waffle, turkey "bacon," hot tea with orange slices, OJ,milk, brotein drink.
Is that how the food like in the US hospitals?

>>9157794
Not sure if intentional, but Cioran was a known teetotaler

>>9158790
>>9158808
>>9159009
So I have a bottle of shitty black rum. I don't want to waste it, since it cost me like $12, so is there anything I can do with it?

>>9160917
Pour it out. Won't do you any good to drink it

>>9157990
good lad

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>>9157990
you're awesome

>>9160441
It's just carbonated water bro

Haven't drank in a week lads. Had a lot of extremity numbness, raging anger and irritability in the first 3-4 days but feeling great now.

Been sleeping 10 hours a night but really feel like I need it.

Eating a steak dinner every night to have something to look forward to.

Am I going to make it?

Honest question to you guys. Do you drink more on good days or bad days?

I feel like the urge todrink more is a lot stronger on bad days usually, which is probably normal I think, but I try to restrain myself to normal drinking (like a beer or two three, not actually gettting drunk)only on bad days and allow myself do do whatever the fuck I want on good days. Today has been a good day (thank God) so I'm like fuck it,. let's clean out my stock and not worry about anything until I wake up tomorrow. I feel like it's more healthy to drink as a reward for being good than to compensate for being abag of human shit.

on the other hand I'm also awae that I have a bad habit of coming up with justifications for thing si want to do anyway I do (not just drinking) , and "rewarding" myself with a night of non stop boilermakers is maybe just a cheap excuse to get wasted.

>>9160917
pour it down the drain and chuck away the bottle

>>9160984
were all going to make it lad. glad to hear things are turning up.

>>9159528
I think he racked up a lot of credit card debt.

>>9161000
>Do you drink more on good days or bad days?
yes

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Love this stuff too. I also drink a fuck load of plain ice water now

>>9160880
On good days, just stay away from the eggs

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>>9160984
Maybe man, but for now you're good. I believe we all have the potential to make it if we want it enough. At least you're on the path you want to walk, which is worth a goddamn pat on the back any day.

IMO the most important thing is to take it one day at a time. And don't blame yourself more than you have to for shit you maybe do wrong now or in the future. The worst thing you can think is fuck it, I had a drink today even though I said I wouldn't, so I might as well have another because it's fucked anyway. If you want to quit and you slip up, you tell yourself it's bad you slipped up, but stopping isn't a one-time decision, it's something you do constantly. One misstep isn't the end, because the next decision is just as important.

This is part of the reason I fucking hate the phrase "the first step is always the hardest part." Fuck that, the first step isn't hard at all. You can make the first step every week and it won't mean anything. The hardest part is that you have to keep making the right step again and again and again. And maybe it'll get easier and easier over time, but you have to keep making steps nonetheless.

I think the most important part is that you made a decision and you're making the steps you need to make. That's admirable in its own right. As long as you keep doing that, you're on the right path and you'll make it, even if the road isn't always as straight as you want it to be.

>>9161013
smartass

>>9161000
The only time I don't drink heavily is when I am feeling I am having an average day. Nothing bad happened at work. Only slightly hung over. If I had a bad day or a really good day I will drink myself into oblivion. "man I'm feeling good I bet I would feel fucking great if I was trashed".

>>9159531
Fuck that's harsh.

I'm not in these threads a whole lot but that still hits home. I hope he shows up again eventually.

>>9161007
>>9161031

Thanks so much guys, we're all going to make it.

>>9161031
This. Really well put anon. If I were writing a self help book this would be my opening quote

>>9160842
You can either decide to stay as you are in which case it will never get better, or just stop drinking. You're probably suffering from extreme brain fog which passes after around 3 weeks and you begin to think clearly again. When I was drinking every night in the same situation as you, I couldn't comprehend how I was going to get a job and progress in any way, but a friend told me about brain fog and I decided to try it. I incredibly boring but once the fog passed and I realised my self slowly feeling better, I realised what he meant. Something clicked and I decided to search for work(also neet) and after 2 more weeks I now have one. I clean trains, it's hard but rewarding and keeps me busy. It's also nights, so I have less chance of deciding to go and buy alcohol afterwards.

Please try it bud. Drink tonight and just stop tomorrow. clean your place out, clean everything...feel fresh and use this to signify a new start. if your place is a mess, so is your mind.

>trying not to buy alcohol
>brain keeps trying to convince me that I need to buy something from a store that's coincidentally right next to a liquor store

fug

>>9160666
>>9160716
I drink rye but the night before I had my first stone I drank a bottle of vodka.

I used to drink no water, and I was working outside that summer, and my father got stones when he was young too. I guess it was a combination of things.

Fun thing about kidney stones is that its actually not the peeing them out your dick that hurts, its when it goes through your ureter to the bladder. Feels like you have cement hardening in your stomach while getting kicked in back and punched in the balls.

2 to 6 days of a cycle of intense pain to the point you are convulsing and going into shock, then a few hours of a codine high, then a few hours of thinking everything is back to normal before it starts again.

>>9161163
Don't listen!

>>9161043
>"man I'm feeling good I bet I would feel fucking great if I was trashed"
I know that feel. The worst part is that it totally does. There's nothing like being in a great mood and putting yourself over the edge to be king of the fucking world for a while. I think at least half of you, the half that isn't depressed as fuck (and if you are, ask for help dudes. I know you deserve it even if you're certain you don't, your own judgement is compromised by shitty chemistry) knows that fucking feel. And that's treacherous as all hell. That's how kids drink themselves to death in one fucking night. It feels so fucking good, so why would you want to stop?

I'm not going to tell anyone to stop unless they really want it themselves, because it would be both pointless and condescending considering I'm too much of a faggot to follow my own advice. But I can't stress enough the importance of at least knowing when to just ride the wave instead of pushing it further. Some of the most dangerous parts are always the extremes, no matter if it's extremely good or extremely bad.

Live your life the way you need to, but know your own limits and know your own pitfalls. There's never any purpose in wrecking yourself.

>>9161065
I completely agree, this is great advice. Keeping busy is my shield even when I'm a fucking mess. I know that the absolute worst thing that can happen to me is to do nothing all week. I actually drink less when it happens, but I stagnate and just lie in bed wishing I was dead, not even eating or showering. Even drinking myself to sleep after work is better than doing nothing all day. I'm different in that I started doing unpaid volunteer work (not everyone's thing, I know) while still drinking every night, but as I keep busy I get my "highs" and I'll make it eventually.

It's important to have little "success moments," even if they seem pointless. Doing well at a shitty job is still a success, and that shit builds up over time to make you a better person.

>tfw shitting liquide fire
it's the only drawback of drinking 2bh

>>9161065
Hospitalbro here, even though I was comatose for the worst of withdrawal I still had wicked brain fog for about week after I woke up. There's just no way around it.

If you get medicall support they'll give you meds to speed up the process but the best thing you an do focus on getting better 10 seconds at a time

>>9161164
Oh I forgot the best part. Afterwards if you have left over buscopan and tamsulosin pills they will give you bigger and more forcefull loads than you thought possible. Fun for the missus

So people who have experienced withdrawals, what were your drinking habits like previously?

Just wondering because I've been drinking practically every night for the last 5 years (2/3 of a fifth, one or two bottles of wine, six tall cans, etc) and even though I don't think I get withdrawals I realize I haven't been sober longer than 24 hours in a very long time

Considering keeping these last three shots of liquor on-hand just in case

>>9161231
I drank 7 500ml bottles of cider/beer every night for about 3 years and then just stopped. I had some shit dreams but that's about it.

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>>9160019
I'm so proud of you!

>>9160019
>I also somehow managed to get engaged

Can't have been that bad then, unless she's a heroin addict and you seemed stable by comparison.

>>9161231
In my experience, the golden rule is that if it's a regular habit (and from your post I'd guess yours is a regular habit), you will at least experience some withdrawal. There's no escaping that. How bad it gets depends on how bad your dependence is, which is impossible to judge as an outsider.

Certainly not everyone goes through the stereotypical movie style (exaggerated) withdrawal. Sometimes it's just something as minor as an increase in irritability or losing sleep. It depends on how much you normally drink, how long you've been drinking, your personal biology and resistance, etc. Some people can drink themselves into oblivion and then quit with only minor withdrawal, while others have shit luck/genetics and go halfway through hell even though they haven't been drinking half as much for half as long long. Biology can be a right bitch when it comes to this shit and it's not as predictable as you'd like it to be.

Not trying to discourage you or anything, just prepare you for the fact that it can work out better or worse than you're thinking it will.

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>>9161257
Salisbury steak and mashed potatoes in brown gravy, steamed carrots, protein supplement, tea with lemon, milk

>>9161287
Not bad, though the thought of gravy right now kinda turns by stomach.

Hurr durr look me I'm dramaqueen bro because I drink more than everybody so I have it the worse so I'm the best!!!

>>9161310
You're clearly new. This general is one of the friendliest places on 4chan, won't find half as much support and kindness in any other thread. Just read the thread and see all of the support and advice people are giving people who are asking for help and/or simply venting.

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>>9161310

>>9161310
I don't get it. Which post made you think anyone was enjoying it? Honestly it makes me feel a lot better knowing other people are as bad or worse than me (sorry guys). This is clearly a support group, not a dick measuring contest.

>>9161337
>Honestly it makes me feel a lot better knowing other people are as bad or worse than me (sorry guys).

I know right. All this shit puts my peripheral neuropathy in perspective

Just ignore him, man.

>>9161332
Hurr let me vent my problems to a bunch of random anonymous people and let them give me unsolicited or solicited life advice and then not change anything and continue drinking and pretending I have friends here hurr

If I wanted a circlejerk I would've gone to /fit/. This general is trash as all generals are.

I can't stop eating chocolate since I stopped drinking

>>9161362
So filter the thread and never see it again

>>9161362
blog it

>>9161362
I actually decided to go sober after talking to a dude in this general over teamspeak, and now I visit to give advice to people looking for it. I've hit rock bottom and I know 'what it's like, so many others here have too, and a lot are going to hit it soon. This is a mostly cancer free general, and most of the cancer comes from shitters like you who can't even fathom how people with no friends can find solace in venting about their problems with like minded people.

is drinking just a tiny bit, like an ounce of something 40%, right before work a great lifehack or am I doing real real bad

>>9161389
If you have to drink before work just to get through work, then you're doing something wrong

>>9161389
Yeah wouldn't recommend. Using alcohol that way isn't a great idea as obviously tolerance comes into play.

I used to drink a few ciders before work and I always felt like shit 2-3 hours into my shift... it's not worth it honestly. I nearly started bringing in cans for my break, and justified it as it wouldn't affect my work.

It's easy to snowball like that, is what I'm saying.

>>9161380
This is a nice story. I'm glad it worked on for you man.

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So many fucking losers lmfao.


Glad that smirnoffnig is dead, maybe the rest of you weaklings will wisen up.

>>9161409
>tolerance comes into play.
I don't eat often or weight much, so tolerance is a non-issue. 3 beers and I have to take a little nap, 7 or 8 and day:over

>>9161435
I just mean in general when drinking before work loses it's novelty, you'll want to drink a little more, or drink at work. I'm saying if you drink every morning your 'normal' state will now always be the feeling of drinking a little before work, so you'll then want to up it to reach a more high state.

Just wait until after work man, honestly.

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>>9161380
Fuck the haters, people like me appreciate the fuck out of people like you.

>>9161458
>>9161435
Yeah drinking to unwind at the end of the day is definitely better than drinking to get started at the beginning of the day.

I can't stop drinking tiĺl I pass out every night

>>9159955
Good to hear man. Nearing a month is a huge milestone.

>>9160438
God fucking willing.

>>9161435
>so tolerance is a non-issue
You're a human being planning to consume alcohol on a regular basis. Your tolerance will rise over time.
After some time, you'll need a larger glass for same effects, and soon enough you'll need this glass to feel normal. It's a pretty sure way to hell after that.
Find something else to make you go through your workday. Anxiolytics, meditation, brutally murdering prostitutes during the weekend, finding another work, anything that doesn't have an increasing tolerance.

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unless someone is going to give some proof, I feel like this smirnoff guy is going to come back sometime after getting over his depression or whatever

>>9161231
see>>9161285

As this anon states, it can really vary. There's no good metric to break it down to "you have to have been having X amount for X amount of time". That being said, if you tried to quit, you would most likely go through some withdrawals. Not necessarily the kind where you're having seizures and hallucinating, but trouble sleeping, anxiousness, etc. are not out of the question at your rate.

For me, I spent about a year ramping up from drinking a few every night, to drinking half a fifth a night, to (at my worst) an entire fifth spread throughout the day, every day. My worst went on for probably 5 or 6 months (hard to remember exactly, it's been awhile and I was obviously fucked up then). I had some pretty bad withdrawals. Stayed in the hospital for 4 or 5 days while they tapered me down with benzos. Shaky beyond belief - couldn't hold anything, couldn't stand up, had some minor hallucinations. It was the scariest, most difficult thing I've ever gone through and I never want to go back to that.

>>9161287
Lol don't think he was replying to you, man

>>9161738
I love spinwheels, they are my favorite. But I am not a goyafag anymore because I've moved on to bigger and better things. This one kid, he remixed all of my videos, and his name was gastric penguin, and he was... So funny, he, like, mixed it and stuff. Omg I had a heart attack.

>>9161738
I'm not going to say with any degree of certainty that he's dead, because I do not know him outside of these threads, but I can say with 100% certainty that it's not just "depression or whatever". Not really something you just get over

There's a new Best of the Worst

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=ebb8baFaQ-s

I always get drunk to watch these, it's great. Not an alcohol, just letting you know.

>>9161738
He ded, his phone still isn't on (or dead)

>>9161822
Technically, he could be at the hospital without access to his phone, as in most rehab.
If he's alive, it's more likely he's in a coma, possibly artificial, and can still die. (That True Blood actor spent 4 days in a hospital before cardiac arrest.)

But it's almost impossible they found him between when he posted he was about to go, and when he did. Only people who ever visited him were a shopkeeper and a taxi who delivered him vodka.


Thinking about it, he may still be in his home...

>>9161899
Exactly, phone died because he died, and in a few weeks they'll find his decomposing body

Do your parents ever get mad at you when they smell the alcohol on your breath?

>>9161738
Didn't he say he was going sober just a few days ago? He's probably in a hospital.

>>9161671
:( have you tried taking a break?

>>9161899
Weird to think he might not have been "discovered" yet :(

>>9162040
Does someone have an address? Should we call an ambulance or something?

>>9160710
This is pretty much me. I need to move and find a new roommate who isn't also an alcoholic so I can shame myself into quitting, at least for awhile.

>>9161000
I drink most days, but the few days I don't are when I'm sick or super stupid hungover. I can't drink when I feel bad which is why I can't drink in the mornings to achieve true alk power levels.

>>9162154
yeah man. Water.

>>9161362
nice. welcome to your first week on 4chan.

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>tfw 16 days sober

>>9161738
Hey bruh are you still hitting that moonshine hardcore or did you have to quit? I remember a few years ago you buying it by the case. Hope you and the birb are well

>>9160631
Fuck what they think. Loser cunts sound like their vying to make themselves more of value by belittling someone, anyone. Do not give up on life, anon.

>>9159100

Go buy a can of dip and cram a quarter of the can into your lower lip. Chew and rotate every few minutes to absorb all of the nicotine.

Doing this sober will give you a pretty decent head buzz. Doing this while you're drunk will knock you straight on your ass if you have no tolerance.

>>9160675
>Are Americans happy with the fact that you cant drink until 21?

The whole thing is a farce. It's ludicrously easy to get hold of alcohol in this country, legal age be damned. I was a total fucking loser in high school and even I had hookups for beer and liquor when I was like 16.

>know of cheap vodka
>like $15 a handle
>give Alex's older brother a $20 bill
>tell him to keep the change
>he gets it to me either that day or the next one

Or even dumber shit like buying a few things off the dollar menu at Taco Bell as payment for them getting your stuff.

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Can you guys imagine whatvit must be like to be a homeless alcoholic? Being in this horrible state but with no warm bed, no water or cooking facilities, no quiet bedroom, no pc, phone, tv, movies, music, radio, nothing. Not a towel, not a toilet, nothing. Just alcoholism and a piece of cardboard to lie on. It would kill me in a fucking instant I think.

>>9162561
I once saw a vid in which a guy took a dogshit and slammed it into a homeless guy's face. I would honest to god impose the death penalty on him if I could. How is this guy supposed to wash it off? Does he not have enough fucking problems? Poor dude was innocently sat there holding his bottle of wine and this cocksucker with an IQ lower than said bottle slammed him. He probably ended up with some horrific infection and is now a homeless, blind alcoholic.
>shudder

>>9162561
I'd rather be drunk and homeless than just homeless.

>>9159100
Buy a full bodied cigar next time. I guarentee you'll be on your ass or puking up dinner. Probably both.

>>9162595
Being drunk would no doubt be better, but can you imagine waking to DT's while homeless and penniless? I've gone through DT's in jail, even that has to be 100 times nicer. At least you're not covered in shit and being rained on.

>>9162587
honestly cannot fathom how someone would think this is something fun to do.

>>9159375
>a bottle a day
do you mean a handle, or a fifth?

i used to drink a handle of ezra brooks/evan williams a day for a good few months. would constantly drink throughout the day, cutting it with water at a 3:1 ratio. since i was hydrated, my urine was clean and never had the maple smell. also no hangovers, but i would wake up with cold sweats.

i was a student at the time, and managed all A's in mid-level math, second-order logic, and theology.

>>9161380
amen. 4chan is basically the only family i have except for my mom. without you people id be really really lonely.

>>9157983
almost a year now. longest before that was a month, but that was "if i can make it a month, then i'm not really addicted, so i'll keep drinking."

AA in reality sucks, but the idea of one day at a time is surprisingly revelatory for such a cliche

>>9162646
Have you considered finding a more circlejerky place? It's what truly helped, metting other neets with who I'd spend 10 hours a day playing video games, watching movies and talking
Really stopepd my drinking for a time

>>9162655
I used to do IRC a lot. where people have nicknames. Here it's less personal of course, but i'm tired of making online friends. Maybe someday I'll try that again. Right now it just feels nice to be totally anonymous. Thx.

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>>9162587
Right at this very moment, there's bound to be at least one person in a third world prison, 100% humidity, 120 degree temp, scorpions and tarantulas crawling over him, beaten and raped, starving to death, and withdrawing from alcohol. The human race is shit.

>When having a no-wipe shit is the best thing that's happened to you the entire year

I guess my standards for happiness have dropped

>>9162642

guuuuuuuuuuuuud fuuuuuuuuuuuur jeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeew

>>9162734
Congratulations

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>wake
>only ~6hrs sleep, woken by withdrawal
>reach for alcohol
>apparently drank it all yesterday, no matter how much I buy
>hours until shops open
>terror, near non-stop vomiting, shaking, seemingly everything makes me gasp with fear
>watch clock for hours, sweat pouring
>it's time
>stand up
>fall over
>stumble to shop, throwing up all the way, pray that I don't vomit in shop again
>there's a huge queue
>want to die
>knock 10 things off shelf while trying to reach my booze
>finally get to checkout
>hands shaking, type pin incorrectly 50 times
>stagger home
>down first drink
>projectile vomit
>try again
>and again
>finally feel the warmth hitting stomach
>down more and more and more
>feel great, listen to music, watch comedy shows, laugh, comfy
>3 hours in, black out
>it's morning again, where the fuck did yesterday go
>repeat
Erry fucking day.

>>9162492
You trying to make him puke?

>>9160917
Just make rum and cokes dude

>>9159859
My cousin just an hero last month. Graduated college, had an ugly gf, schizo mom. Ate cat turdz as a kid. Can't say I was surprised. His mom went on a cruise ship she booked months in advance two weeks after she cheaply cremated him.

>>9160917
Keep it for when you're really desperate
You won't care how shit it is then

>>9162848
>ate cat shits
W-what?

>>9159859
Well, napped all day, woke up, drank and did funzies with my brother while playing some video games online with my friends. All the while stating, "What the fuck [cousin]," while fleshing out our frustrations.

Guess that's the extent of my grieving.

>>9160194
You in LA?

>>9162864
Seriously from age 4 to 9 his mom was bitching to my dad he's eating cat shit from the box. I can't eat candy bars and can't be around cats. I dry heave.

>>9162885
There is no part of this which isn't utterly crazy. He was surely being sexually abused or something. Some fag priest was probably making him eat his crap. No wonder he killed himself.

>>9162811
Jesus fuck, m8. Start brewing gallons and gallons of cider. Once the first batches are done, you'll never run out if you just bottle them and start another. Did this when I was physically addicted.

>>9162811
>puking so much you physicaly can't even keep the booze down

At this point just set it up as an IV

Been sober for 7 months now, quit cold turkey after I got laid off. Still having trouble sleeping at night. My mind has always been racing since I was a kid, but Mr. Booze helped to slow it down to a manageable speed. Without it, I'm back to my old self of thinking 5 - 10 sentences ahead and skipping sentences in conversations because I already know what I was going to say, confusing people. I'd pretty much been a 12+ beer or 12 - 16 drink a night guy since college, so over a decade. Physical withdrawals weren't too bad, just aches and cold sweats. Worst part is laying here in bed, staring at the ceiling with my mouth watering 7 months later.

>>9162892
No, he grew up in southwest Mississippi near the Louisiana border. My aunt moved out there with her 5 husband and he was her only child she had at 40. They divorced when he was 7 because she was fucking somebody she worked with. Her bullshit eventually killed Nana and we all flew down for the funeral and they(aunt and cat turd boy) were assholes the whole time. Dad paid for the funeral, etc...etc... Just shitty part of the family. I forgot about him for 14 years and finally we meet up on Facebook and he's fucking odd, but u know not like his mom. We keep in contact about how his college is going, jobs, girls, I don't ever bring up the cat turd stuff. It was like his autism thing I guess. Well, his mom calls me up June 22 10 pm est while I was at home drinking. I pick up because I recognized the area code and I know he calls from different phones. So its my aunt and she's crying, she just came home and found her 25 year old son blew his brains out.

My liver and pancreas are literally aching but all I want is a drink.

Last night I ate an entire pot of spaghetti (about 8 bowls) so that I would be too full to go out and buy booze.

>>9163014
The only thing I could say was, oh I'm sorry. She cried then said I have to go feed my cats while crying. There is no moral to the story. Sorry.

50 minutes until alcohol sale starts
fuck me I just want to get the booze before I go to sleep and wake up after the sale ends

Withdrawal is the fucking worst.

I laid in bed last night, 48h post binge weekend, and seriously felt like I was dying. That moment you fall asleep, only to awake to a frozen jolt. I'm trying the taper route, to keep the ticker at reasonable levels and not feel like I'm literally going to stroke out.

My hard days of using are (hopefully) behind me (pint of whiskey plus a couple beers daily), now usually a bottle of wine a night girl. I'm only 30, in very good shape, but I can literally feel a shift in my body's chemistry. Fucking despise this disease. Hate the revolving obsession of pushing away the urges.

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I drink a lot. Anyone else?

>>9163040
30 mins here, but my jaw has begun chattering. Next comes the vomiting, and by that point it's almost impossible to leave the house. I might just fucking overdose, I can't do this forever.

>>9163094
Perfect. I had a small amount saved so I could get to the shop. Drank it moments ago, felt that familiar instant heat/sweating, didn't even fight the fact that I was going to lose it all. Got my puke bowl ready in the 3-4 seconds I knew I had, then goodbye booze.
I am so fucking sick of this life.

10 minute walk time, it's time to get going to the store

>>9163148
Where are you located? It's 3:00 am here in NYC. This city will always sell you booze. Arab bodegas don't give a fuck what time it is as long as you got the coin.

>>9163167
England, and the laws here are strict and retarded. I'm stumbling to the shop as I type, opened 8 minutes ago. Feel like my heart is about to fucking explode

>>9163167
Oops sorry, I'm not the anon you asked (but I answered) difficult to walk, read, type and try not to die from WD all at once.

Anyway, I have acquired alcohol. Sitting on a bench downing some, waiting for the energy to drag myself back home

>>9163178
Grab your take anon. Also, grab a water or gaterade (or whatever similar). If you've been hurling, you gotta get some salts and water back into your system.

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I hate myself

>>9163167
In the baltics, it's 10am here.

>>9163060
london

>>9163197
Home.
Thank Christ for that.
And yeah I always keep water nearby, plus I plan to eat a piece of bacon and a couple of bites of apple as soon as I'm drunk.
I'm ok now. To YouTube, to watch '8 out of 10 cats does countdown'!
Then wake again in what will feel like 3 hours, to again await for the fucking shop to open and do it all again.

>>9162625
They didn't give you medical attention for that? DT's can be quite serious (I'm sure you know that, obviously)

>>9162958
Maybe time to try some new hobbies

>>9163283
They gave me Valium, but ignored me when I told them that I was already addicted to it as well as alcohol, so it had absolutely no effect on my alc wd

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>>9163224
We all do, well a lot of us at least.

Just got accepted in to another term of university, means I will have money for another 6 months.
Vodka and ice before noon, this is going well.

I've had 15 units this morn. It made me capable of swallowing 3 rashers of bacon, half an egg, half a banana, 200mg of thiamine, an a-z vitamin/mineral pill, a vit abc pill and a coffee with some honey.
I haven't felt this comfy for months.

In the liquor store 15 minutes after it opened

>All around me are familiar faces
>Worn out faces

Simpsonbro here, just awaked to have a lot of blood drawn for labs. The good news is I get a jello cup, fresh ice water and my pain meds now.

>>9163490
I may also try to make some hot tea with lots of milk and sugar while I wait for my pill to kick in

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>>9163521
>when you have to wait for a pill to kick in

Need some benzo wd advice. I'm 3 days (I guess starting on the 4th) in klonopin withdrawal and I think I have phenibut somewhere, is it worth taking? Is it better to avoid?

I slept alright the past 2 nights but I don't think I'll be able to sleep today (already 7 am). Anxiety is manageable, mostly peripheral stuff with heart rate/blood pressure/body temperature getting to me.

All you DTing cunts need to get inspiree by simpsonbro and just check in. There are moments were tapering on your own is not going to cut it

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>>9162261
oh hey there oldfag

I had quit for like 5 months because of illness and going to the bathroom literally every hour but I'm better now and started driniking again only on the weekend which is more enjoyable

thanks for thinking of me bud, hope you are doing good too!

>>9163572
You're at the peak of withdrawals. It should go down after day 4.
Can you take your own bloop pressure and heart rate, or do you just feel it going up?
In general, it would be safer to taper, but idk klonopin and phenibut specifically.

I'm sitting here drunk af imagining some life that I don't have and that's okay, because as long as I'm happy in my mind, that's all that matters.