Let's say hypothetically I had a friend who had $250k in somewhat questionable funds.
How would he go about laundering it?
>inb4 nail parlor
You don't launder finite sums of money, you launder income streams. If you've got 250k, just spend it over time. By the time you've got everything set up to launder your 250k you've already fucking spent 25-30k doing it.
Option 1: try some sketchy BS hare-brained scheme that someone on 4chan told you
Option 2: look at what has actually worked consistently throughout history for Italian mafia, Greek mafia, Asian gangs, bikers, etc and open up numerous retaurants, bars, pubs, clubs, etc.
Don't reinvent the wheel. Keep it simple.
Possibly, but what if they need as much capital as possible for a clean investment. My thoughts would be to start a cover business like OP already suggested (car wash, vending company) and claim whatever amount they needed over the course of a year. Pay your taxes, and use your money for legit purposes.
>go to vegas
>say you plan on dropping hundred plus grand in chips
>get comped flight and executive suite
>enjoy weeklong stay in vegas
>gamble a few grand of it
>cash out chips with clean money
Technically correct, but lets assume he found a dead smack dealer in an Escalade with a duffel bag full of cash. He has no idea how to generate an income stream he just wants to get this cash clean.
In addition to these suggestions:>>1024215 and >>1024254
one could also buy a fixer-upper house with only 10% down, then pour cash into fixing it up, and sell that. Rinse repeat.
Casino logs monetary transactions
Sends report to irs
Irs wonder where you got that money when your income is quite low
Irs audit you
"Oops I took advice from 4chan"
Oh we totally understand
If I came across a modest sum like $250k I'd keep it in a safety deposit box at a bank and take out a few k here and there as needed. Or keep in a home safe for less security. No need to access it all at once. If you owed someone a huge sum of money give it to them and let them worry about it
step 1: sell a piece of shit art and put it up in an auction
step 2: have your friend routinely buy your shit art
step 3: become a famous artist while successfully laundering the money at the same time becoming a successful artist and people think you're shit art has some sort of deeper meaning. liberals and hipsters gobble that shit up and will start buying your shit.
step 1b: have your friend use your shit art as collateral or to get a refund in taxes, there was a really detailed plan about this a couple years back in /pol/ about how jews used modern art as a money laundering scheme and it was genius, somehow they laundered money while making a successful artist and getting more money back in tax refunds all at the same time.
fuckin kikes man, geniuses with saving shekels
Only large in and at out in single transactions, even then they have to prove where the money comes from. Nobody really gives a shit as long as the casino makes money. And most of the high rollers are likely doing exactly that. 1 person doesnt spend 500,000 in a year because watching flashing lights is "fun"
Be a cam whore/Use a female as cam whore front. Find a site that takes the lowest rake. Use proxies and pre-purchased credit cards to send HUGE tips from a handful of accounts. Some girls make thousands per day legit.
If you want the easy road find a non US citizen to be your cam girl front. That way they take withholding tax upfront, but you won't have to file taxes or do shit else except cash the check.
Thoughts on this?
You have to buy it legitimately, but once you own it you can fudge the numbers on the cash income. You say it made more than it actually did, thereby allowing you to pay tax on your questionable cash, and be able to spend it freely.
Bars, restaraunts, cafes, laundromat are all good for laundering cash.
Art is also exempted from inheritance tax many places. That's why the Samsung family is the biggest private owner of art in the world. Great way to store revenue and avoid taxes that is normally put on properties.
Let's assume that the drug cartel made a mistake they can't correct. They don't kill everyone who fucks it up. Because the whole opreation won't stand or fall with just one single drug or money run. Hedging your bets and insurance, you know.
Let's also assume that you got a nice place to hide it, have a legit source of income and have spending discipline.
For everyday expenses such as rent, gas, food etc, you use your legit money. For the non everyday expenses, such as birthdays gifts, use the money you found. Sure, the money you found will be "slower" than your legit money.
In short, like this anon wrote:>>1024282
No- that's how people the get caught and go to prison do it.
Here's what you do- you sit down and calculate how much sullies it takes to make a $5 sale.
This ammount of cofeee, this sugar, this many cups...
Then you order those supllies, ring up the register 400 times, and throw the supplies away.
This entire thread is basically just a verbatim regurgitation of any shitty mob movie released since the 80s. Or more likely Breaking Bad since you're all just a bunch of sniveling little millennial cunts.
how can I put money in the bank without the bank filing a currency transaction report?
at what point do they catch on that you are structuring?
it's simple OP, most contractors like to be paid in cash, they will even give you discounts to be paid in cash. Since you know that they won't be reporting much of that cash to the IRS then you should just invest in something that will use a lot of contractors. Personally I would find some cheap house, fix it up using said contractors and then sell it and make the money clean by paying tax on the profit.
What the fuck is going on here guys?
Do none of you know what money laundering is?
Let me explain it really clear and simple: You take illicit funds, usually piles of cash, turn it into legal, revenue, put it in the bank, and pay taxes on it.
Fuck come on people
Trip to Macau.
They'll let you play with it without a passport, just a signature. Also the authorities there give no fucks unless you're trying to launder RMB (and even then you have to be on a political shit list).
Take a vacation, put your cash in chips, play for a little bit for the sake of realism (blackjack is best odds), then cash out.
in my country the idiot-proof way is to do arbitrage sports betting where you bet every option in 1X2 with sums in perspect with the inverse values of the odds (hard to explain this correctly my mother language is not english) with fairly small amounts of money(so it doesnt raise suspicion) many times. you need to have many kiosks/such places within a small area to do it efficiently.
you lose 12% of your money but its worth it because the national gambling company sends the laundered moneys you won straight to your bank account if you used the gambling card of the company.
>in my country the idiot-proof way is to do arbitrage sports betting where you bet every option in 1X2 with sums in perspect with the inverse values of the odds (hard to explain this correctly my mother language is not english) with fairly small amounts of money(so it doesnt raise suspicion) many times. you need to have many kiosks/such places within a small area to do it efficiently.
Best idea I read!
>Buy bitcoin in person, a few grand at a time and far away from home
>When you need the cash, convert to USD and pay capital gains, saying you bought it years ago and forgot about it or something
Seems pretty foolproof tbqh senpai.
Thought of a new one: claim you found a satchel full of money on the highway. Turn it in to police. I believe the law in the US is that if no one comes to claim it after 30 days or something it's yours to keep.
Of course no one will claim it cause it's your money.
>to make a $5 sale.
>ring up the register 400 times
Then you'd be using more supplies than what you've ordered? Surely you mean to order enough supplies to make a $2000 sale, then throw those supplies away instead
If you cant google, you wont get very far genius.
If you have cash, you buy Bitcoin in person on LBTC. Then sell it for a profit on the same site and they pay by bank transfer.
Declare incoming transfers as whatever, and pay tax on it as applicable.
If you have a lot you open an offshore account and transfer it there.