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Lazy cook thread !
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The stories and information posted here are artistic works of fiction and falsehood.
Only a fool would take anything posted here as fact.

You are currently reading a thread in /b/ - Random

Thread replies: 280
Thread images: 88
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Lazy cook thread !
(Also stone food thread)

I'll Start
>>
This is such a shit tier sandwich. How the fuck do you hold it when half the infrastructure is egg? Go to hell.
>>
bumb for interest
>>597164197
there is no need to be upset
>>
>>597164030
Wtf..
>>
Also Bumping
>>
man its something so good when stoned and lazy.
>>
Moar please
>>
More pleaze
>>
Omg. Plz. Post. More.
>>
More niggas
>>
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try this
>>
More for mamma plzzz
>>
>>597164030
Frozen pizza has always served me well
>>
lol that looks awful
>>
>>597164197

how do you go through life being such an autist? you cut it in half like the picture shows or use a knife and fork
>>
Is there any more?
>>
I just want some more.
>>
That's all I ever want. Moar. Plz. Anon.
>>
Can we get some more?
>>
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This shit is good with garlic, cream and cheese.
>>
I'd really like some moar. Haha
>>
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Why cut a hole? Why not just sandwich the fucking egg?

Lazy jackass
>>
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>>597164030
>>
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>>
Ya more plez
>>
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>>597164905
sounds awfull
>>
Moreeeeee
>>
>>597165015
thats fuckin cool
>>
>>597165015
ebin :^)
>>
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>>597165015
>>
>>597165015
#onlymuricanthings
>>
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amidoinitrite
>>
>>597164030
And we wonder why americans are so fat...
>>
>>597165062
These are the only cookies I make anymore, they're that good.
>>
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>>597165395
>>
>>597164572
I like how the empty pocket guy is a nigger
>>
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>>597165062
>Nitroglycerin
>>
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>>
>>597165456
That shit don't come in that type of packaging in 'murrica
>>
>>597165395

what is this, food for ants?

not worth the effort
>>
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>>
>>597165062
I tried this one a couple of months ago. Would recommend this one. So easy as well, that's the best thing.
>>
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>>597164905
Why milk ?
You saxons can't eat anything without milk, can you ?
>>
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>when you run out of clean pots to boil water in
>>
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>>597165561
surprised ?
>>
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>>
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>>597166000

i sure am
>>
>>597165204
>>
>>597165015
that looks fucking disgusting
>fat+fat+fat+topping with fat
>>
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>>
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>>597165896
maybe all the calcium is what helps us not look like fucking Habsburg bastards
>>
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>>597166178
whats the point ?
>>
>>597164197
>lazy cook thread
>shit tier sandwich

bruh
>>
>>597165062
It was like an explosion of flavor in my mouth. 10/10 would recommend
>>
>>597165688
Learn to french fry
>>
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>>597166745
>lazy cooking thread
>learn stuff

meh..
>>
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>>597166739
>>
>>597166373
Habsburg were blonde people of german ancestry. They fucked their own aunts. I only see northern europe there...
>>
>>597166254
Do you own a fucking knife?
>>
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>>
>>597167296
Does that taste good? O_o
>>
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>>597165062
This is bait right? No one has nitro just sitting out.
>>
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>>
>>597165062
Screen capped for later culinary use. Will post results.
>>
>>597167296
The fuck is that shit
>>
>>597165929
>do the fucking dishes you slob
>>
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>>
>>597164197
Um, maybe because the egg is fried candyass faggot
>>
>>597167395
How fucking retarded can you be?
>>
>>597164572
mmm... bleached bread and chemical cheese.
>>
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>boil lobster for 8 minutes. Done.
>cook turbot in butter for 15 minutes. Done
Step up nig nogs.
>>
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>>
>>597168308
No....NO
>>
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>>597167296
>Sriracha
>Mah nigga
>>
>>597165062
Don't do it anons. This makes nerve gas
>>
>>597166739
kek
>>
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>>597168308
>>597168562
im reminded of this
>>
>>597165062
This makes mustardgas
>>
>>597168766
Nigga, that's popcorn and ketchup
>>
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>>
>>597168666
shit man I love plastic in my pizza
>>
>>597165062
that banana isn't even ripe. faggot
>>
>>597168983
That's fucking disgusting...
>>
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>>
>>597166254
Not even sure this nigga owns a spoon
Sad thing is there are probably 30-something unmarried man-children that still live like this.
>>
>>597168852
Mother of Gawd.
>>
>>597165513
Hnnng
>>
>>597165496
you're doing gods work. Anon
>>
>>597165508
sorry, but this is a British monstrosity
>>
>>597165929
all that spaghetti
>>
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>>597168852
>>
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>>
>>597169547
If this guy has a blog showing what he eats erry day I want to see it.
>>
>>597165062
Fucking asshole, I'm fucking posting this from the hospital because of you.
>>
>>597165204
I tried this once and it still didnt get the stain out
>>
>>597165929
knees weak
arms spaghetti
palms spaghetti
spaghetti on his shirt
moms spaghetti
>>
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>>
>>597164572
Or buy some pasta/rice and get better nutrients + more calories
>>
>>597164197
Top (ramen) kek
>>
>>597170079
Is that a tomato?
>>
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>>597170251
>>
>>597170251
If you ran out of bowls, you can also eat it from your fedora
>>
Here's one of my favourite lazy foods.

Buy some pita bread (Or any circular bread with some thickness really)

Apply layer of ketchup (or pizza sauce)
Dress with minced meat, sausage, bacon or what have you.
Apply cheese.
In oven until chrisp.

Lazy man's mini pizzas - And cheaper than store bought ones unless you're in Merrica, in which case they are probably made out authentic cardboard anyway.
>>
>>597165688
>>597165496
>>597169547
>>597168587
>>597168033
>>597167815
>>597167296
>>597167011
>>597166254

Seriously though, this guy wins this thread. I both admire and feel sorry for him at the same time, because I know this is not fake.
>>
>>597164572
Or just make a grilled cheese. Fuck thats a stupid one.
>>
>>597170079
wow thats a shame
>>
>>597168308
Id throw up if i saw that in person
Holy fuck thats disgusting
>>
>>597170818
These are old photos, lurk more pls
>>
>>597170373
> confirmed /fit/
>>
>>597168797
>>597168925
Please be bait...
Or be American...
Either will justify the autism
>>
>>597170251
You disgust me
>>
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>>597165204
>>
>>597170744
kek
>>
>>597167395
Christ you're a fucking moron
>>
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>>597166739
>>
>>597168587
На двач пиздуй
>>
So much glorious shittyfoodporn.
>>
>>597171120
You must be new here.
>>
>>597171626
If 7 years is new then yeah...
>>
>>597171565
get out of here stalker
>>
>>597171756
>taking the bait
How autistic can you be?
>>
>>597171756
>>597171626

newfags detected
>>
>>597171856
Diagnosed with severe Aspergers actually you insensitive cunt.
>>
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>>597171081
>>
>>597172001
Yes, well in the DSM-5, the diagnoses, you see they've merged them, mmm hmm.
>>
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>>597172001
>>
>>597164030
You can improve this recipe by using two pieces of actual loaf bread (like the kind you have to slice yourself (The bigger the better, this is important next). Cut the middle out of each, big enough that you can fit 2 eggs in each. Cook it the normal way. Make a sandwich with cheese and Franks Red Hot. Dip this motherfucker in syrup. Have tastebud orgasm and die of heart attack.
>>
>>597164030
I never understand this. what keeps the uncooked egg on top from flying off when you flip it?

better yet why not just fry an egg and put it I'm a normal grilled cheese sandwich instead of cutting holes in the bread?
>>
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>>597166739
>>
>>597165814
Now that's a sandy sammy. Momma always told me not to fill up on bread, but this is the exception
>>
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>>597170818
how did you know it was the same person who posted these?
>>
>>597172567
You have to be pretty good with flipping things. It thickens up enough and soaks into the bread a bit, so that holds it together.
>>
>>597172225
The A̲m̲e̲r̲i̲c̲a̲n̲ Physciatric Association thinking they can diagnose mental disorders...
Now thats autism kids.
>>
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>>597172711
>>
>>597172742
>thinks he's qualified to dispute the DSM
>can't even spell psychiatric
>>
>>597172742
Fuck you. I'm a physictratist
>>
>>597164197
nigger do you even into cooking?
i bet you cannot make a fucking ramen properly
your mom wont fed you until you die faglord
>>
>>597165015
> Call the roommates
Fuck em, ill pour all of it down the kisser
>>
>>597173055
Sorry i wasnt forcefed a dictionary shitcunt...
Im disputing American intelligence as a whole...
Being American is a mental disorder.

>>597173091
Fuck you too, You spelt it wrong also...
>>
>>597168666
Satan? Why is your radiator mounted to the wall? It should be on the ceiling
>>
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>>597173008
>>
>>597169217

ALSO ALUMINUM frikin' PHOSPHATE!!!
>>
>>597169018
them bitches dont fit
>>
>>597170744
Exactly mfw
>>
>>597172711
Because I don't think you have the patience to photoshop that
>>
>>597165015
This genuinely looks disgusting
>>
>>597170813
>authentic cardboard
>teehee
>>
>>597170744
Top fucking kek
>>
>>597165062
Fucking bait. No one uses gluten free flour
>>
>>
>>597165626
I don't know why I lol'd at this
>>
>>597168852
kek'd heartily
>>
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i like my lunch on the go
>>
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>>597168308
How, colorful
>>
>>597174582
danish faggot
>>
>>597170687
Looks like an orange
>>
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>>597175564
er der et problem?
>>
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>>597165395
i think these totally fit the remit
>>
>>597164030

special tip for valentine's day: use a heart shaped cookie cutter to cut out the hole for the egg, then serve to her with breakfast in bed.
>>
>>597176293
moar of these kind please
>>
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>>597176632
great idea for my waifu.
>>
>>597168983
WHAT?!?!?

...
I thought those were eggs...
>>
>>597166250
implying eating fat makes you fat.
visit /fit/ sometime.
>>
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>>
>>597170079
Thanks Michelle Obama!
>>
>>597176632
You're such a romantic, anon.
>>
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>>597176833
>>
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>>597177031
>>
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>>597177031
>blaming one person for a nations retardness
>>
>>597177067

once she's had the egg, you can give her the sausage.

(that better?)
>>
>>597165513
dunno, rest of the break would have no taste.
well, it would tase like bread.
>>
>>597171499
These two. Pretty much described making this>>597164030
in the show
>>
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>>597176833
>>597176833
>>
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>>597165062
>>
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>>597170079
Takes me back, man. French fries were currency between 11:30 and 12:30 at my school.
>>
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>>597168666
If Harmony Korine did this he'd get critical acclaim for it.
>>
>>597166254
> have money for ketchup
I ate my 'pizza' with tons of butter on it, and the stuff I could find in the fridge. Now THAT was a real cheap pizza.
>>
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>>597177031
who's fault is this then?
>>
>>597174793
this is gold jerry! GOLD
>>
https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=0ctVN61UV0U

I wish desperately that this was a joke
>>
>>597177457
>>597177077

Thanks anon
>>
>>
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>>597177211
>>
>>597164572
This one tastes like shit, try using whole wheat bread and mozzarella, monterey jack or any shredded white cheese.
I don't get the love for american cheese
>>
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>>597177946
>>
>>597177657
Marie Harf
>>
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>>597177946
>>597177946
>>
>>597178062
> this is what brits actually eat
>>
meatloaf recipe
https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=c8Ng8to0fLk
>>
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>>597177946
>>597177946
>>597177946
>>
>>597177077
the fuck is this shit?
>>
>>597177946
what the F.
i lived in poor conditions too but this one doesnt even make any sense.
>>
>>597178263
gg, but I'm not sure what this is even supposed to be. part of the disgust factor is clearly recognizable ingredients (hot dogs, ham pieces, ketchup)
>>
>>597178338
yes, like this. I see chocolate chip cookies, rice, ketchup and what appears to be canned chili. Together in what I'm sure the creator of this called "cooking."
>>
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>>597178736
Incidentally, the faggot I live with eats like this all the time, and unfortunately I allow it to rustle my jimmies. I even offer to show basic cooking skills beyond boiling water.
>>
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>>597170251

I threw up in my mouth.
>>
>>597179045
yes, that one is too hard to even think about.
>>
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>>597170251
20$ says this asshole has type 2 diabeetus
>>
>>597179034
I live with a guy who don't really have any cooking skills, other than boiling water.
I teached him to make hummus, and now he just eat hummus on everything. I even saw him put hummus on ramen.
>>
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>>597168587
>2course dinner
lel
>>
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>>597179560
toppest kek
I don't even mind showing people things. But the faget is quite happy with his rice and sauce or whatever the shit he eats. He does the thing with the hot dogs too sometimes
>>
>>597165015
what the fuck
>>
>>597170687
>>597175627

How amerifat are you guys that you can't tell plant shits apart?
>>
>>597164030
I did this once. it was not enjoyable.
>>
>>597165513
This one looks worth making it
>>
>>597165015

>buy cooked food
>mash it up in the most disgusting order possible
>call it cooking
>>
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If this is the new and improved version, ignore any changes.
Original was better.
>>
>>597177266
You know, I'd never considered the possibility that there are people out there that won't like a food unless the carbohydrates in it can't be tasted at all. This honestly makes a lot of things make sense to me now.
>>
>>597168033
>>597167815
>>597167296
>>597165015
>>597170251

'murica
>>
>>597167296
fuckin' lol'd
>>
>>597181917
and tortillas. there must be some secret list of foul bachelor food somewhere that they all agree on
>>
>>597174793
Are you that guy who has a fetish for food in wallet? There was a thread with people fucking up their wallets wif food.
>>
>>
>>597171120
babby's first post
>>
>>597182289
>>
>>597169547
>savoys?
>>
>>597182289
>>597182289
Dammit, now I want that waffle iron.

I feel like a kid whose favorite athlete just promoted a box of Wheaties.
>>
Kg of mince, kg of frozen veges, kg of chopped potatoes, and one big onion. Put in big 'ol pot with water and season to taste.
This gives you 10 decent sized meals for $15.
Food isn't hard, retards.
>>
>>597165929
Had friend make ramen noodles in a coffee pot while at a hotel. The maids were so pissed about it.
>>
>>597182911
i have one and i make galaxies every Saturday morning.
>>
>>597177544

In elementary school your wealth was measured by how many of those slightly lemony sugar cookies you could amass.
>>
>>597177657

Man those peaches were good, especially when they were still slightly frozen.
>>
>>597182967
replace the minced meat with lentils and you are down to 1 dollar or less per meal, and still feel full.
>>
>>597178205

Eh, I've eaten those.
>>
>>597164572
This is not an innovative ricepe, this is called a grilled fucking cheese sandwich and its being made by a fucking autists that doenst know how to make the simplest fucking thing on earth
>>
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>>597183369
You're a radical person, anon
>>
>>597183935
Nice.
You vegetarian?
>>
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>>597178910
My sides are in another dimension. Accept these tits as a humble offering.
>>
>>597178269

Don't knock it till you try it, it's actually better with the addition of cheese.
>>
bumping for interest bc im a lazy piece of shit
>>
>>597184279
No argument here bro. I love beans on toast.
>>
>>597184144
I don't eat meat and I generally eat as cheap as possible when I cook for myself, so I can save money for my hobbies, passions and eat good food with friends.
>>
>>597168666
never laughed so hard in the past few weeks
>>
>>597184617
You've just given me a thrift boner.
>>
>>597184279
>take bread
>place cold beans
> place cheese
>place another slice of bread
>place in sandwich press
>bite into that shit fresh out the press

Thank me later
>>
>>597185379

I will try this
>>
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>>597182701
sihit nigga
>>
>>597185379
Jaffle burn has killed more people than cancer, you fucking monster!
>>
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>>597164030
>>
>>597185754
You know that Ferrero made Nutella?
Google it, son.
>>
>>597173519
>being American is a mental disorder
>being American
>mental disorder

Yeah, you mongoloid autist shitbag. Because being born in a country makes you retarded by default. You should have been stuffed in a burlap sack and drowned in cat piss at birth.

>tl;dr
>fuck off and die, autist
>>
>>597186105
I didn't, no
>don't see your point
>>
>>597185146
cut out meat and cheese from your meals and you'll be surprised on how much money you can save.
>>
>>597185654
Gotta eat it fresh and hot
>>
>>597185614
I would cheese it up. One of the greatest sandwiches I've had
>>
>>597177657
i still dont understand who thought it was a good idea to serve corn with pizza. every fuckin time, man...
>>
>>597187311
Sweetcorn ON pizza is good. Sweetcorn WITH pizza is wrong and awkward
>>
>>597187599
Chicken and corn pizza is awesome.
>>
>>597184617
So 1kg each lentils, frozen veg, and chopped potatoes, plus a big onion and some salt/pepper.
And just boil that shit?
>>
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>>597165513
Why haven't I thought of that...

...aaand now I'm hungry....
>>
>>597187311
the USDA.
>>
>>597186231
Butthurt amerifat detected
>>
>>597184617
>read porn, sex toys, and McDonalds
>>
>>597187960
This guy

It really is, anon. My sister had a phase of chicken, sweetcorn and pepperoni. Sounds a bit backwards, but tastes pretty good
>>
>>597188180
Proud britfag reporting in, faggot.

That cunt threw an aspie shitfit that got me mad
>>
>>597188039
Yeah. Stir periodically.
(Brown the meat in oil with the onion first obviously)
>>
>>597174582
My Favorite... Except I use cheap ass $1 Spaghetti sauce...
>>
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>>597170251
Quite honestly, you disgust me...
>>
>>597188039
not 1 kilo of lentils!!! probably 4-5 deciliters will be more than enough and then 1 liter of water to boil with it.
>>
>>597188859
wait, you switched from mass to volume on me.
>>
>>597177627
underrated post
>>
>>597178168
>love for american cheese
I live in America and I have never heard someone say they like American Cheese.
>>
>>597178062
>toast
That's bread faggot. You need to toast the bread to make toast.

Even this brit knows what I'm talking about: https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=UUPSGvWr6xE
>>
>>597166394
su hat
>>
>>597188300
drinking..vinyls..either go to some palce to eat or use most of the day to put together a meal and drink some good wine with it.
>>
>>597165062
Dem crystal edition cookies m8. Best banananana cookies ever
>>
>>597168308
shiggy diggy dooooo
>>
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>>597164197

Great use of the word infrastructure
>>
>>597189377
nice dubs
i like this guys videos
>>
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>>597164572
bleached bread and government cheese that will leave you hungry again in 40 minutes, great idea
Thread replies: 280
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