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If it means anything my girlfriend hates herself in almost every way possible and she doesn't want to live. I'm the only reason she hasn't lost it all yet. She thinks I'm sick of her shit and i really am but i want her to be happy so i tell her it's fine and listen to her,
>>571907852 I've been scared one day in going to wake up and she's killed herself overnight, She talks about it sometimes but i usually calm her down. I'm not a person that's sad. But if she did i dont know what i'd do.
>never had gf before >adorable qt is into me >has explicitly told me she was into me >still too low self esteem to feel like anyone would ever want me >most likely never going to act on it even though shes asking for it >feel like shit
>>571908517 >>571908336 My ex fiance died in Iraq. It was brought up a couple of nights ago. I've been feeling like shit all week. You never get over it but you do deal with it better. Some nights though are really hard.
>>571909172 it really sucks it may not seem bad but its awful every day i feel more alone i want to talk to someone but i dont know anyone here well enough to say stuff like this my brother and sisters dont want to talk about it because it makes them sad too
my mom is also schizo and gets worse every day and now im not living with her to help her cope and be happy my dogs that live with her are in their last years too and i will miss those last moments becuase I am at school now and I hate it here I got forced to come here and I dont even know what I want to do or have the motivation to try here On top of this my dad went from separating to dating a blonde bimbo with 5 kids from 4 previous marriages immediately, and now when ever i try to visit him/my brother i have to deal with her and her 5 other kids being there when i just want to relax and talk to my dad or brother my dad doesnt care either. keeps trying to have me bond with them, and weve only been fully moved out and separated for 5 months now.
This girl I've known since preschool is bipolar and horribly depressed. She's in a relationship with an asshole that sometimes makes her happy and sometimes screams at her and calls her disgusting.
And I love the girl. Before she was dating this donut we became best friends over a summer and then dated for a week. Things went poorly and we didn't talk for a long time, but I never stopped thinking about her.
A week ago she texted me saying she had a dream about having lunch with me and I ran for an hour across town to get to her house to sit and comfort her about her shitty boyfriend.
Seeing her cry is awful. She's so small and so god damn pretty and her eyes and the tip of her nose get red when she does so she's beautiful even then.
I've talked to her for a few days inbetween now and when we stopped talking years ago.
Each time things would go well and then she'd decide she hated me again.
I'm just afraid guys. I was getting better at not dreaming about being her friend again. Not dreaming that things were as they were and I got to love her without having her hate me.
Now when I talk to her everythings wonderful. We both smile and I make her laugh, but whenever I reach out to her it puts the fucking fear in me.
Maybe she won't like me this time. Maybe she'll wake up in the morning and decide she can't stand me again. Maybe she'll decide she doesn't need me.
If she didn't need me I think I'd kill myself just to escape that feeling, but I don't know if I could out of fear of hurting her, even if she said she hated me.
We go back too far. I remember sitting in her back yard in preschool.
It hurts guys. What the hell do I do to keep myself from freaking out every time she takes an hour or four to reply to a text?
>>571909430 Lol youre so fucked up dude >im 18 >think im cool being an asshole >my attempts to be cool with people i dont know or ever meet Idgaf about being a white knight, /b/ gets lame and more lame every time i lurk out of boredom
My only socal interaction happens at work outside of that im 100% alone and all i do is smoke weed and go fishing. And im oddly comfortable with it, i just realised that ill never have a qt gf and even if i did id never make her happy now im a lone wolf for life
>>571909869 at least i can cook alone you fucking idiot. i laugh at idiots like actin all social and shit and then cries on the internet that people hurted you. fucking idiot what did you except? >>571909938 say that to yourself you fat neckbeard faggot
There are a lot of things making me sad, but the smallest thing hurts the most. It's an online friend ignoring me, after being on and off for 6 months, because I finally told him that I felt like he didn't care about me. He still frequently talks to our friends and it breaks my heart.
Here within my castle of wooden blocks and toys Everything is as I wish, for I am its King-boy. All my fine tin soldiers, lined up on the hill, Standing ever-vigilant, enforcing my good will. And in the city serenade my dancers on a string, Turning heads, captivating, as the music chimes and rings. The cars akin to carriages fill my cobbled streets, As vibrant towers soar above; this city’s finest feat. Though plastic people entertain, they lack a will their own, For only I exist here-in to call this place my home. No others dwell within this realm of merry make-believe, Though I’d gladly give my kingdom up for one more such as me. One might think with such realm they’d not feel all alone, and that this feeling of solitude be sated by the throne. But a kingdom without subjects is hardly fit to rule, And a King without a court just a jester, and a fool.
My best friend died 3 weeks ago after a 2 year battle with cancer. I remember lifting with him a week before his prognosis, then watched over the 2 years, while me and all his friends were off going to college while he continually got worse. I wish i didnt go to college far away from him, but im thankful for every second i got to spend with him on breaks, and how much we were able to talk and text on the phone and shit. but man, I cant think about anything but him right now. Lowering your best friend of 20's casket into his fucking grave was the hardest, most fucked up thing ive ever had to do. its still just so hard to believe. OPs pic hits home. Sam, just send me a fucking text telling me about how much dick tony romo sucks. i miss and love you so much bro...
>>571910714 Don't know what you're not sure of man. Often these people really are messed up. I think the general lot here knows when they're just getting their leg pulled by those dumb "I'M SO SAD" bitches.
>>571910594 >>571910762 Sounds like high school stuff to me. You'll get through this /b/ro. The shortest amount of time I dated a girl was for about a month. I was depressed for maybe a week after the break-up, and all good after that. The longer the relationship goes, the more the break up is gonna sting for sure. >>571911012 >still shitposting nigga's on a roll tonite
>>571909679 "If fighting is sure to result in victory then you must fight!" Sun Tzu said that. And I'd say he knows a little more about fighting than you do pal... because he invented it! And then he perfected it so that no living man could best him in the ring of honour!
>tfw best friend since 3rd grade randomly cut me off and told me he hated my guts this summer after i didnt hear from him for a bit >tfw tried my best to apologize and work shit out but his mind is set >tfw sad
Well, 3 year time span. 2 dead grandmothers, 1 dead cat, one new ex-fiance 6 year relationship, 1 miscarriage, Massive inadequacy, Transgender realization, 1 grandma the most supportive in family, 1 dog lost to inability to care for a dog it's size, 4 lost guinea pigs, one dead giving birth to twins, twins given away, as well as the father, ex's choice. 14 year old dog approaching end of it's life clearly. I'm 23 hes been with me for more than half my life. B'aww?
>>571911887 >>571911839 obvious troll is obvious. This is how he deals with his lack of real world happiness. This is the place where he can't get beat up and none of us wan his lunch money so let the little tyke tucker himself out
>>571909686 Just be great for her man, but don't let her stop you from finding your own girl. Trust me, there's other girls out there that are just as nice.
If you stick around in hopes of getting her, she'll use you to take a mental crap, leaving you with a mental boner. Move on, but be her friend, she'll probably come running harder and faster once she realizes you're not her toilet anymore.
>>571912830 oh look some neckbeard faggot thinks with his stupid anime and waifu bullshit he got something in his life also his fucking anime cosplay friends think they got something to live for. fucking die in a hole you piece of shit
>be type 1 diabetic >have thyroid issues too >complication from infusion sets, forget the name, but, there are depressions in my skin where my infusion set goes in, because the fat layer under it melts away >phimosis >4.5" dick >long, thing arms, which do not get built no matter how much work I do >probably like 99 other problems I don't know about yet
>>571913578 say that to yourself fucking gay nigger anime fucking idiot. just end your horrible miserable life fucking gay transgender vegan trigender lesbian gay faggot nigger jew. >>571913612 you deserved everything fat faggot jew >>571913912 suck my dick heaven
>>571910746 Bro I had to do it at 16, I understand what you're going through. Eventually it gets easier, but it will still hit you like a brick from time to time. I sure remember the times we had together..
>>571913612 That's pretty bad Anon. Sorry about it. I don't know too much about those issues or how to fix them, so the most I can do is offer you a silly gif of a chicken's head staying in place. Look at it... it just won't move.
>>571914029 You're rather anxious to describe me as gay. Is there a particular reason you're so transfixed on this fantasy, Anon? I won't judge you if you want to b'aww about it. This is the place for it. We'll accept you here.
>>571907430 man im only saying this to you because i was in the same scenerio as you, leave, leave right now well you have the chance i promise u wont regret it. theres no way you guys can go on like this forever and the more u wait to break it off the more attached she will come to u. then it just ends with her getting way more hurt than you ever intended and you hurting yourself as well. i know its your choice but seriously ive been theyre dude you gotta do whats best for u
>>571914572 Ah, I'm not too worried about it. He'll act that way regardless of what goes on in this thread, so the least I can do is try to show some human compassion and hope that it gets through on some level. If not, then summer is almost over, and we'll just see him in nine months and try again.
>>571914893 This man speaks truth... You can't love somebody based off them taking themselves hostage. If you haven't seen Shutter Island, watch it, and consider what your life might become if you try to stick around for it. It's not just her you have to worry about being hurt, it's everybody else she may hurt while she forces you to keep her around.
>>571915035 Even if she comes to you later, don't go for it man... Caring about somebody is fine, befriending them and such, but I was in a similar situation and she hurt me pretty badly when we got together.
>>571915456 I consider it a good thing. The only thing keeping me around is that my stepfather co-signed my car when I got it, and if I off myself it screws up his credit score... All things come to pass, and I'm okay with dying. I kind of welcome it most days. I don't like the idea that people might take it that badly, because I consider it something peaceful to look forward to. So why should my peace give them troubled sleep and bad dreams...?
>>571906591 >>571906591 Oh Fuck off, stop being a bitch, you'd rather your parents be in the same house hate each other and their living arrangement and argue all the time while resenting ever having you, the only reason they still have to see each other every day?
>>571907430 my gf was like that too, even once she almost overdose with pills... now shes ok and we have a 4 years relationship. dude if you really love her stay, things eventually get better if you dont just go
There's this girl. She's beautiful, in my eyes at least, but I don't even care about what she looks like. I spend more time with her every single day than I do with any other girl or even person. Sometimes I'm just sitting beside her and we don't do anything and I just watch her work and she makes me smile for no reason. I look at her and I just think of how beautiful she is and how gorgeous her hair is and the way her lips will quirk up when she's awkwardly smiling or the way whenever I talk to her, her lips will split slowly and her teeth will just start to show before her smile grows to this absolutely dazzling grin. And she has the best personality of any girl I've ever met. This girl is impossible to not like and she is by far the nicest and the kindest and the most gentle girl I've ever met. And maybe I don't love her but I really think I'm at the very least in love with the idea of her
>Father died when I was 9 >Only and older brother died 2 and a half years ago >Lost my mother to cancer last thanksgiving. >The only woman I ever loved can't take me back after I pushed her away cause of how fucked up I am.
>>571916412 She's honestly just too good for me. She's never been in a relationship and I know for a fact she'll never feel about me the way I feel about her so I just go on with it. Because having her as a friend is better than not having her at all
five years ago i graduate highschool and all my friends left to go to college. i stayed and tried to get a job, couldn't get one, was alone, still alone, and i can't take it anymore. i did nothing with my life, i'll be 23 in 5 days and i feel like i'm having a midlife crisis because i've done nothing and lost all my friends. i start a new job soon but i don't know if i can keep it, i don't know if i'm strong enough. i want the emptiness to end, i want the lonelyness to end. i have family that loves me and the only thing keeping me from suicide is that it would devastate them if i went through with it. knowing how hurt my parents would be is the only reason i'm still here and it's killing me. i want to go, my time is done, i'm done, i want out but i can't. so i made a promise to myself, i'll at least make it through to new years. beyond that i don't know. i feel like i'm dead inside, i don't enjoy anything, it's all a facade. i want things to change.
man the edgy kids are really out in full force tonight, I am sure he wouldn't want his parents living in the situation you described, but he is upset that his whole family is split up and are actually living in different states, and he is not going to be able to celebrate the holidays with his whole family unlike your entitled ass
>>571916519 I enjoy parts of my life, but I have no defined goal or motivation other than to survive, and I get exhausted with it. I don't know... I don't plan to kill myself, at least not until I'm like 45 and can say I gave it the ol' college try, and my affairs are in order. But nothing makes me think I'd linger to life, if I got sick, or in an accident. I mean that whole Ebola thing in Dallas is happening and I'm just not worried, in the slightest. I feel bad for those people, that's all.
>>571916736 I take back the above then I guess... don't tie yourself down to a sinking ship, but just as bad, don't tie yourself down to a ship that won't sail. If you care about her that much, you'll have trouble feeling the same about others. Others who will care more for you.
>>571917161 23 happened a few months ago for me, and I'm working a part time job I hate until I can get back on my feet, because everything fell apart recently. If you're near Dallas I'll buy you a beer. Or we can go catch Ebola together.
>>571917560 I've never liked a girl like this or like her before. Normally the feelings I have are shallow and for equally shallow girls. Normally I like the girl for how she looks but it barely matter to me with her. here are girls who I consider to be absolutely beautiful but I'd rather spend time with her than any of them
>>571917828 >>571917739 Hate dogs on a personal level, but companionship and love are great. Sorry about your dog Anon. Good on the two year thing though, hope it works out. We'll be here to keep you company on the bad days, and make you miserable on the good days, if you need us.
>>571918168 Been there, with a friend that had only ever been hurt, so she couldn't trust somebody again. I loved her more than anything, and I don't think I've felt the same since. Now I'm sort of like her; I've only ever been hurt, and I can't trust somebody again... difference is, I don't have somebody to care for me like I did for her. But I guess I don't need it, when I've got you guys.
>tfw only have a few months left with a girl before I leave for uni >tfw we are just friends >tfw she makes no hints that she likes me as anything more >tfw watching her hug and laugh with other guys >tfw kissless handholdless virgin >tfw can't shake the feeling that I had a chance with her at some point
>>571918680 Find a hobby that interests you, and commit the sad hours you wish you didn't have to live to it, instead of spending them wishing they didn't exist. For me, it's forum roleplay. I found a cool scifi site where I made a villain character that people are actually interested in, and came up with a series of plans to actually pull off and progress a plot line, since the site lacks one. I might be made a moderator soon, and I've been supplying the site with new faction and setting data, to polish its cruder parts and make it more in depth and interesting. I also took up leather working as a hobby, and am learning to build armor and bags that way. I like anything where I can create, or build with my hands or mind, and show people what I've made. It's even better when they appreciate it... I've given a few of the satchels away to people who liked them, for free, just because I enjoyed the joy it brought them more than I felt I wanted payment for it.
So, tonight I'll throw that party and I know just what I'll do Yes, I'll meet myself at midnight and cry the whole night through Yeah, I'll meet that ghost of sadness and he'll look me in the eye And in that room there'll be that bottle And me, myself and i
>>571919084 You're silly. You're going to Uni... you've got a shot right now. Maybe for nothing long-term. Maybe you'll decide long distance is shit (it is) and nothing'll come of it. But you can try going to her now, or tomorrow, and have the courage to tell her how you feel. Worst case scenario you're the idiot that had his heart on a sleeve, and you can use that to show future girls how romantic you are when you tell them how you were rejected. Spin it a cute way... Best case scenario, it works.
and there is no way you are just some edgy kids that make up some bullshit story so you feel like you have some valid reason to make fun of him, and even if your stories are true both of the situations with your parents happened at a young age, your parents being divorced or a missing father was normal for you because that was the normal environment for you growing up , the other guy who lived with a normal family his parents just divorced and they all have moved to separate states where it will be a lot harder for him to see them, he probably had a very close-nit family so it's probably going from seeing these people everyday now to rarely seeing them at all
>gets depressed >writes music >shares Since you’ve been gone, nothings changed, except for the way the birds sing, they’re mocking my sadness, and mockin’ my pain, and the people around me are all just the same, seein’ me sad thinkin’ i’ve got a migraine, but its that feeling, that feeling making me insane, that feelin i get whenever I’m around you, and the sun doesn’t shine the same way it used to, when i felt like it was shinin’ on us two, cuz it turns out without you, eveythings changed.
>>571917520 My parents split up before I was even born because my fathers was cheating. I haven't seen him since I was 13 and my mother lives in a different country. My sister and brother in law are the only other family I have in the city and I don't spend holidays with my brother in laws family cuz that would be weird. And I don't cry about it
I can honestly say I'm the happiest I've ever been in my entire life. I just have trouble sleeping once in awhile. its not even that bad to be honest, im usually up til midnight anyways, and I used to have actual insomnia... now i just occasionally get sleepy early but can't fall asleep.
hearing someone talk just helps. I think its cuz as a kid i shared a room with brothers and just listened to them talk about whatever was up that day
>>571906591 > living with mother alone now as im 18 > whole family is polish > living in germany > family everywhere, japan poland uk like everywhere > nobody likes my mom > alone > phone rings > ah hi just wanted to tell you 6 near persons died like few years ago includeing your mums brother yadda yadda yadda > thx piece of shit family best part the most of them are fkking rich and they care a shit bout us
Memories can be made with any one, let go of her, you don't owe her anything, yeah she makes you happy one minute, but the next she is making you feel shitty, love isn't suppose to make you feel shitty, you need to move on dude, life is short, and it really is short man, I remember high school like it was literally yesterday, and i've been out for about a year and half, and so much has happened, you need to learn to let go, and move on.
My girlfriend broke up with me after moving to the other side of the country. I went through absolute hell and betrayed my best friend to be with her and she ended it. I'm so confused and lost now. I want to move on but I don't think I'm ready, I want to forget about her but I can't. This is the wrist thing I've gone through.
like i said there is a difference between someone growing up with parents that are already divorced and then someone who is grown up well lets say at least there teens and then there parents split up, you don't cry about because you were born into an environment where you didn't really have any family and your parents were split up, so growing up that was normal to you as opposed to someone who grows with the normal family of a mom and a dad
>>571906075 Shit OP, you made me cry so early, when i was 14 and my father died, i was calling his home every day and crying screaming to he answer the fucking phone, now i am 23 and feel as half of me died that day, he was the only person near to me.
Yesterday i saw my highshool sweetheart wondering around my college after 3 years of knowing nothing from each other. We bumped into each other by coincidence. She gave me a wave with some shy smile and i was shaking.Why am i not over her?
>>571921560 Yeah i get that, i used to be in a long distance relationship and me and my girlfriend would stay up at night talking on the phone. i usually had trouble sleeping but when we were on the phone it was just easier, not because she was boring or anything but theres just something comforting about having someone comfort you while you're slowly falling asleep
>>571921929 Hey, I'm still around, and plan to be. Shit'll pick up soon. Or eventually. Or at least I gave it the ol' college try. Sometimes a little hope and childish will is all it takes to save things.
My girlfriend isn't a virgin and it disgusts me to no end It wouldn't be so bad if it wasn't so depraved The first guy was a guy I knew years ago and was alright, but then she did it with two "friends" while in the same room as me (and I had to beg to sleep on the floor and not a dog bed) and then she did it with some guy she met online who payed for her to fly out to him and basically just gave it up to him Now she's with me after I gave her counsel as a Christian and I'm sure she loves me (or am willing to have faith in that until she proves otherwise) but I can't get over how used and tertiary I feel I love her so I can't just leave her, and I want to marry her, but the marks her past leave make me feel sick, furious, and wronged I want to die but suicide isn't an option God causes all things to work together for good, but for the first time in my life FULL of suffering and pain, I just feel like I'm suffering for no reason
One of my closest friends died from heart attack 2 years ago. He lingered a week in a coma before they pulled life support. Literally a day before he had his heart attack, another friend who was like a little brother to me committed suicide because he got divorced from his childhood sweetheart. I got into a fight with a girl I was madly in love with because she had been lying to me. She was my perfect counterpart in all ways and had been the first girl I loved in a long time - didn't talk to her again. 4 months later my grandmother dies. I was her favorite. 2 months after that, my cat of 12 years was poisoned by a neighbor - but I didn't have absolute proof. 1 month after that I was fired from my long time job just because of cutbacks, that same week after I lost all my insurance and everything, I ended up breaking my ankle and tearing open my knee - both of which required surgery. Lost my home 2 months after that to a fire. 2012 was, without a doubt, the worst year in a long time since I was 19 and lost my gf due to a drunk driver. I had the engagement ring and was less than a month away from asking her to marry me. For all of you whining about trivial things - grow the fuck up. You all know shit about real loss. I didn't contemplate ever eating a bullet or being a sad, mopey sonsabitches like you all are. Fucking grow a pair and deal with your shit.
and really just try to compare these different environments, you parents were already split up by the time you were born, as you grew up you were already adjusted and accepted it, and now the other environment is the person that had lived with two parents married together as one family unit, and then all of a sudden their whole reality changes , they lose contact with a lot of their family , they might have to choose between who they want to live with if they live with their parents still and just a whole bunch of things and all these things are really hard to adjust to
>2006, be me 16, sophomore >she live in my block, 2 yrs below me at some other school. >have common friends. my 1yr younger sister didn't like her much, did talk to her every once in a while though. >my best friend, wants to play a prank on me. what an idiot. >idiot thinks he'll tell HER that I like her and want to get in a relationship with her, So, she ends up raging at me or worse. wanted to have a good laugh, the idiot! >Idiot didn't know she was already flirting with me and was probably interested in me. >feb 2006: Idiot goes to HER and says what he wanted to. She ignores him by saying, can't get into a relationship right now blah blah, some reasons... >Idiot repeats the words for a week >SHE finally confronts me, asks if i really want a relationship with her. >NOTE About her: was 9/10 when she was 15, every fucking guy wanted to get into her pants. i was a nerdy albeit cute 7/10 guy. >back to story, i look at her and in an instant i think: a 9/10 chick is asking if i want a relationship with her. do i? of course i do! >tell her yes. >her expression softens and she's like, "anon i like you as well and i had just been afraid that we might end up losing our friendship. so that's why i didn't say yes for many days." >i chime in with all the cheesy shit dialogues i knew: "i'll never break your heart, i'll always be trruthful to you.. blah blah blah" >the relationship starts. >she can be really charming when she wants to... the cunning bitch! she has me rolled around her pinky! i'm in love with her. >2 months in i say "i love you, femanon" fucking ted mosby would be proud of me! all-my-jelly.jpeg when she says it back! best day ever! >but then it starts a downwards slope. she tells me what to do when to do it. i'm her shit-eating-bitch! >I'm so meta for her:
aug 2006: >she tells me how a guy in his class flirts with her. i get jealous but try to keep my cool. >sep 2006: one day she tells me she's going to meet up withe the guy so she can't come to meet me. all-my-wut.gif >feel heart-broken. next day she's back. she's all about how much she loves me and will always be with me..live with me and die with me..blah blah.. >oct 2006 starts: my sister and my friends all say she's trouble. they have pretty much pestered me all these months to get far far away fronm her... >i never listened to them. my bad! paid for it big time! >one day in oct, my friends have had enough. intervention. i give in. >20 oct: "femanon, i can't be with you, i'm sorry!" >She's like:"wtf? why? what happened?" >ME:"i don't like the way you talk about that guy from your class. how you meet up with him. i want a loyal gf. etc, etc, bye." alpha abut heart is all crushed. oh the pain guys... >friends and sister are elated. they take me out, try to cheer me up... but to no avail. my face is dark, gloomy, lifeless....
fast fwd 2008 >July: Idiot had already shifted to another part of city so we don't meet much now. we talk on phone though. >one day he calls me and says he met HER! he knows i've been moping for the past year and half. >he tells me that she asked about me... >i do the unthinkable of calling her.... >fucking fuck the feels guys! we are crying and aplogizing and wanting to get back together - forever this time. >i wish i knew better than to trust her crocodile tears! >oct: i was freshly into college and after paying tution and shit i had nothing left. fucking fuck i was so poor back then
>her b'day comes late oct: i can't meet her, can't give her a gift... poor as well as busy! she says she doesn't mind. she loves me not for my money but for my heart. >her heart is as beautiful as her face. 11/10 through and through! >my god, i couldn't be more in love. i would have eaten her shit that day if she'd just asked me once. >how stupid was i back then? >1 nov, 2008: "anon, i wanted to tell you some thing" >"yeah darling what is it?" >"my mother found out about us, she is threatening me to live you or she'll disown me!" >the fucking fuck? "honey it's okay, let me just get done with my 1st semester exams and i'll come and talk to her... i'll show her that you are my everything and i'll always love you!" >"No, anon, we can't be together. i can't be with you anymore... we should break up anon. good bye" >all-my-wut-da-fuk.mkv >"but...but...but.... honey listen to me" click. call breaks... my world crashes around me... i'm suffocating. i'm gonna die. >i call back, no answer. i try again, no answer. my class is in 10 minutes, i'll call afterwards. can't concentrate on studies after that. >i keep on calling her, sending texts for pretty much the entire remaining sem... no reply. don't study any, just cry and mope for her. >appear in the exams but don't write much... >result day: flunked in all subjects. my face is gone! life's ended. >parents think i'll bounce back... best parents ever and i ended up breaking their hearts as well. >i want to drop out, parents insist i keep on it. they have no idea about HER! >i stay at college... meanwhile every opportunity i get i'm calling her. sending her texts... no reply..ever! >3 years of this... >i never pass more than half of my subjects each semester. and i used to be honor roll student in school...
>>571917439 Creepy part, my love, Emily, knows this song too, she sings it as beautiful as an angel. She gives me hope for life. Thank you all for letting me realize what I have. Thank you all... *Crying as I'm typing this...*
>>571923950 WORST FUCKING YEARS OF MY LIFE! >i wish i had dropped out at the earliest. no point dragging the mess that my education had become... >parents hadn't lost hope yet... they kept me there. i just didn't have enough energy left to say no to them, or do anything else either.. >i slogged on.
fast fwd 2011 >nov: facebook friend request! it's HER! >3 days i contemplate whether to accept it or not. college friends say maybe she wants to get back so accept it. i do! >a week later i delete her. >last study sem. >exams in december - fail all subjects again...
>feb 2012, first week: A new friend request. it's HER again. 2 more days of yes-no.. i accept again. >i thought it was a mistake at that time.. but it was for better... >a few days later... >fb chat is on >"hi, anon! how're you?" >"hi, i'm fine, how're u?" >all the pleasantries, we are both being cautious. >well, as you'll have it, i get fooled by her voice again, think she's probably back for good, AGAIN!
>we get into regular chatting and talking on the phone... >of course we are being cautious, no one taking it any further.
> be a 14 year old me > mother is on hard drugs (heroin, cocaine, ect.) > dad is pretty neat, tries to help my mom > at school, third period > class phone rings, teacher picks up and says it's for me > dad is on the phone > his voice is shaky as fuck, sounds like he's gonna cry >dafuqisgoingon.jpf > ask what's wrong > he replies "your mother got into a car wreck, anon. she's in the hospital" > wot > he tells me he's gonna pick me up from school > walk back to my desk, not really understanding what was going on. > played it cool for the next hour until father-anon picks me up > picks me up, goes home > stay out of school the next day > dad goes to work that day > home phone rings, goes to pick it up > was father. pretty sure he was crying > ogod.jpg > mother passed away over-night > tfw when you don't know what to feel and just respond with an "okay" > dad says he's gonna stay at work > fast foward a week > dad starts drinking heavily, starts to yell at me saying it's my fault why she died > one day while he was drunk, it was 11 AM, he walks up to me and yells in my face > getthefuckoutofmyface.jpf > got really pissed at yelled at him back, calling him an alcoholic faggot > he punches me directly in the face > i immediately hit back, punching him straight in his eye socket > continues to beat down on him, being taller than him > i knock him on the ground and go to my room and lock my bedroom door > hear my dad on the phone but i don't give a fuck > hear sirens outside, pieced it together pretty quickly >ofuck.gif > i slowly open my door and go into my living room where my father is at the door and 2 cops are standing there > tfw you know you're fucked > get's taken into JAC (juvenile assessment center) > scan my fingerprints, take my photo, ect, ect > i wait at the JAC for about 3 hours > they round up about 6 other kids and put them in leg chains and handcuffs and tell us we are going to JDC (juvenile delinquent center) > gos to court and found guilty of assault
>>571924384 i want you to get in a long term relationship right? and one day have them get you something from the store one night and they never come back. ever. you get a call, saying they died. i dont think you could ever let that go.
>So, by now I've had enough with this pathetic life of mine. >I don't trust anyone, don't like anyone - ok, maybe my parents, but hey they love me more than they live each other. >anyways, i'm trying to live on a day-to-day basis. >the last 6-7 years have been really bad >really bad - the understatement of the century. >but things are getting better now, i can actually make out people's motives now. >even when she' talking to me i can actually clearly make out her cunning now.
>july 2012: >i've had enough of being nice to the bitch who has made my life hell for the past 6 years. >time to alpha it up faggots. >i have a clear mind now, i almost know what i want now. >me: "where is this going femanon?" >she: "i thought we could just be friends." >me: "no, that won't do. i expected much more than plain friendship from you. if you change your mind about me, you know where to contact me."
and that was the last sms i ever sent that bitch. >the nightmare ends.
next part: how i turned it all up. the happy ending coming up guys, so stay tuned.
>>571906075 best way to treat this is changing the subject... last night while working graveyard... we were getting pretty bad radio interference or a bad prank, 4 times through out the night carnival type music was coming through the radio. then a child's laughter was heard.. No one has fessed up yet. The carnival music was whatever, but the child's laughter got us all. I haven't heard any of them impersonate that type of laughter before, so I'm having trouble figuring out who it was, plus 3 out of the 4 other guys are also trying to figure it out. I say 3 out of 4 cuz I'm not ruling out these guys as all innocent.
>my entire village has been killed by Ebola >am Sierra Leone refugee >travel to Liberia >friend of brother invites me over to get me out >fly to Texas >feel sick >I have Ebola >placed in isolation and will spend the remainder of my days in this room Welp, got dat Dallas wifi
It all started in junior high, I couldn't say for sure, but this kid, rode my bus to school he wasn't appealing in any way, or form, not even fun to talk to, but then again I wasn't the most social kind of guy, the only guy I ever socialized with was actually my only friend, he was a great person, and I trusted him, I never trusted other people to well, didn't know them to well, but he did, he was like a beacon to me, what he did I wanted to do, he didn't seem to care about any one, fast forward to high school, this guy, my best friend ends up being friends with that one guy, who I told you about, lets call him T, my best friends, lets call him J, well T and J became friends, and in doing so I was forced around this guy, didn't really have a problem with him, just wasn't to interested in being his friend, now we all know this is teen angst, and love triangles, its high school, we get it. Fast forward a few months, J falls for a girl, a shitty girl, who just wants his dick, they're hitting it off, I don't know where it went wrong, he wouldn't ever tell me how he felt (j), I don't know why he didn't trust me, me and him were think like peas and rice, ever since grade school, he changed drastically too, he stopped caring about feelings emotions, he wanted to get what was his, and then he gets in to drugs, weed mostly, but it had an odd effect on him, I don't hate weed, but i think if you can't handle it you shouldn't smoke it, he changed, horrible, became a prick, he would make fun of T daily, I would join in, but J was my friend, I wanted to believe it was honest fun, I tell myself that, but I know it was wrong. Well, me and this T guy went back and forth, he ends up dating a few of my Ex's highschool lovers never end, I don't know what his infatuations is, but he seems incessantly stuck to me, well, fastforward, I put high school past me, me and J don't hang out, dudes to mean for my taste.
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