posted this last night btw
>relay what i've come to call it as "The Jordin Method" to /b/
>enjoyed by some, doubted by others of course
>not for entertainment purposes
>stories of "The Jordin Method" for entertainment purposes (don't worry it's pretyped asshole)
Recap: I had created an online profile on the site POF, using my pictures, my personality, my interests. It was regularly ignored by mildly attractive women and of course because I'm the REAL supreme gentlemen (anguish dies with it's host), I decided to fool these women into going on dates with a lifterbro, who spoke multiple languages, had an exquisite resume, beautiful car, 11/10 alpha.
It was easy to get a 10 to talk and even agree to go out on a date with "Jordin", my original plan was to go to the restaurant and just watch this girl from the parking lot, I wanted her to experience misery and I wanted to see it. But the project evolved...
>inside enjoying the agony from 10 ft. away
>had already thought about her texting/calling, phone was on silent
>wait around, this girl isn't going anywhere, she wants this alpha D badly
>a long while passes, realize i've been waiting on someone who isn't coming too
>keep checking phone of course, looks like i'm waiting on a reply or something, igcognito
>shocked how real i'm making myself look, feel like robert deniro
>inside i'm relishing her sadness as i read her texts
>decide to drop a bomb
>Jordin: I thought about it, I don't feel like driving tonight, send me another shot of your pussy in a couple months and we'll see
>phone in pocket
>wait a couple minutes
>look back at phone, appears as though I only glance at the screen but I send the text from "Jordin"
>decide to talk to her
>not dressed for a date at all, ripped t-shirt and yankees hat, jeans and fucking skechers
>me:"hey you waiting on someone too?"
>a tear almost forming in her eye
>b:"yeah but I was stupid to think he'd really be interested in me."
>my cock jiggles
>remember betas, remember i am one
>think of the coolest guy in school that i could remember
>what would he say?
>me:"well shit if this is how it goes for you then the rest of the women in this country don't have a chance"
>shes smiling up at me maintaining eye contact
>me:"i'm anon", my fucking tooth sparkles
>me:"so did you go on one of these dating sites or somethin?"
>b:"yeah, it's turned out to be a huge mistake"
>i say nothing
>b:"are you meeting someone here?"
>me:"well I was, she's not coming i guess"
>b:"oh did you meet her on a dating site?"
>on pay dating site, pay dating site, pay
>b:"well we're both here, want to get a table?"
>no fucking way that just happened
>dinner goes well, no sign of spaghetti, i should probably mention i'm not a bad looking guy
>finish dinner, thinking- i shouldn't ruin this, best to leave now, well done anon
>do the opposite
>me:"so i know this place that has cheap drinks."
>b laughing:"oh so i'm a cheap date now?"
>i didn't pay for her shit wtf is she talking about
>she follows, sees my car, i do have a cool car at least, cause you can just buy those
>have drinks, actually buy those for her, thinking of it as an investment
>playing it cool, realize tricking a woman into thikning i was alpha was better than having to be one
>all those wasted months at the gym, Jordin you silly fuck, i love you
>b:"want to go back to my place?"
>don't mind if i do
>she lives half way across town, was funny when i set the date up, not so much now
>didn't drink much, leave her car there
>were in her place, smells like cat piss, want to vomit but taking it like a man
>for the team (my cock and i)
>making out, squeezing the shit out of her ass and tits
>think i may be god, does anything truly go at this point?
>b:"do you have a condom?"
>my pants undone at this point
>shes fucking hammered
>me:"just suck it"
>not Jordin's 14 in, 40 oz. can sized cock she was expecting
>7 in. hot dog lmao
>also orange pubes, full bush, wasn't expecting this at all
>as i utter the words, my head breaches the glorious plane of her warm wet suck hole
>about to blast 1 minute in, she stops and mumbles
>b:"gonna eat my pussy?"
>almost say fuck yes let me at it
>dick needs a break
>like eating pussy, do alphas need to eat pussy?
>decide they dont
>me:"nah i gotta fuck, hows your asshole"
>i take my time lubing it up with my spit, one finger, then two, making sure no shit is on my finger nails
>probably would have fucked it anyway
>i grab my dick at the base, it's harder than it's ever fucking been /b/
>i slowly ease it in, with every inch she moans a little louder
>eventually, balls deep in her asshole
>2 minutes of thrusting
>this can't continue
>i blast what feels like a mountian sized load into her asshole
>first time anal in my life, fucking love it
>keep thrusting, my dick knows what time it, could still cut diamonds
>5 minutes, then 10, moving her into different positions, thrusting harder, faster
>15 minutes, thrusting violently now, shes making so much goddamn noise, i could probably lift her with my dick at this point
>me:"oh shit oh shit, come down here"
>i pull her by the shoulder down to her knees
>she looks crosseyed at my dick, i know what shes thinking
>grab the back of her head and pull it towards my cock, her mouth opens and she decideds to give it her all
>space vaccums don't have this much suction power
>i force her head as far as it will go, 3/4 of my dick, and blast a 2nd even bigger load down her throat
>some jizz spills out the side of her mouth with my cock still in it
>hot as fuck but my cock is spent
>lay down together
>b:"blah blah blah you can't leave me i need a ride back to my car in the morning, promise you won't leave"
>me:"yeah no, no problem, i got you"
>have to work in the morning, used to waking up around 6
>up at 5:30, shes out cold, a hard slap wouldn't wake her
>in her bathroom, lipstick on the mirror, one of my favorite things i ever did
>"I got your # from your cell, ttyl"
i do actually talk to her again, buy a 25 dollar clamshell burner to text her, we fuck a few more times, but in the interest of entertainment- moving on to a new girl
not all girls were this easy, meet..
>spot fucking sexy 9/10
>Jordin hits her up
>shes all for it, dick pics sent, nudes recieved, lets meet, no problem
>i've done this like 6 or 7 times at this point, always pretty easy
>always survey the sadness from the parking lot, it's part of the fun and an ode to my real self
>getting harder to find places where i can run this game and still see inside the waiting area though
>head inside, wait around, the usual
>don't send the not coming text from Jordin anymore just because time spent waiting is always around 45 minutes total
>bitchs will not leave when they expect a prince to come save them
>me:"have you been waiting for someone this whole time too?"
>arms crossed, lips pursed, she looks like she'd like to stab me
>a:"he'll be here soon"
>sure he will bitch
>me:"oh that's cool, i was waiting for someone too, she's not responding to my texts"
>she doesn't say a word, shes fucking furious
>me:"what's wrong? are you gonna be this upset when he shows?"
>she looks pitiful, i'm actually feeling bad for her
>a:"the fucking asshole isn't answering his phone"
>me:"you know what would cool you down is a drink, come sit at the bar with me for a minute"
>she looks defeated, she gets up reluctantly and follows me to the bar
>shes frigid but at least shes talking
>2 drinks in she's slurring, her voice stutters and makes that sound like shes about to cry
>a:"it's just really hard to find a good guy in this city"
>me:"yeah people on dating sites are flakes, you never know what you're going to get"
>laugh inside my head, me, me is what you're going to get
>letting her guard down i can tell, staring at me more when i talk, smiling
>bartender, she'll have another
>5 drinks total the bitch has completely transformed, shes having a good time, i'm good at conversation by now
>a:"so i live like 10 minutes away?"
>i already know which town lol
>a:"can we go watch a movie or something away from all this noise"
>of course we can
>a:"ohhhh no I can drive just fine"
>we arrive at her place
>door barely shut and she aliens my face
>we're making out, stumbling through her living room
>i flatback, she falls on top of me laughing
>hurts but fuck pain, only sissies feel pain
>a:"ohhh what have we here?"
>that'd be my dick sweety
>she undoes my button, and reaches in, grabs my cock
>biting her lip, she doesn't think of anything, doubt she even remembers Jordin's 14 incher
>she goes down on it fast and furious, best fucking blow job i've ever had, better than a porn star
>my tolerance has built, enjoy 15 minutes worth
>literally tear her panties off, like, two pieces
>she moans, i see her pussy visibly wetten
>a:"i'm clean, don't stop"
>i ease into her pussy, it's tight as shit, some of the best i've had yet
>shes freaking out, this bitch may actually be a porn star
>pick her up, we're standing fucking now, first time for me
>legs around my waist, fantastic
>try to do my usual
>me:"how about that fucking asshole does that wanna be FUCKED?"
>a:"no just fuck me"
>thrusting away, i reach around and play with her asshole
>shes loving every second
>a:"i've never done it"
>me:"it's all you'll ever want again"
>sure it is
>a relenting smile crosses her face
>a:"ok go slow"
>she puts her legs down and turns around, bends over 3/4 of the way and i spit directly onto her asshole
>she laughs, bitch can't wait to try this
>i push my head up against her asshole, it's fucking water tight
>must get in there
>shes moaning painfully, obviously having second thoughts
>the head penetrates and she yelps, her head to the side, i can see that pain in her face
>eyes clenched, mouth agape
>a:"ahhh it hurts ahh"
>i go deeper
>a:"ahhHHHHHH ouch, ouch"
>deeper i go, her eyes pop open, mouth fully ajar, you could park your fucking car in there
>balls deep, all the fucking way
>she screams 3 pumps in, i'm done 2 pumps in anyway
>startles me and i pull out
>shit blows out her ass
>try to side step that shit (literal shit) to no avail, all over my legs
>smells fucking god awful, she runs into another room all panic like
>i dart for my pants, pull them on over my shit covered legs, socks shoes, everything got it? check
>head for the door
>hear her whining through the wall, sounds like shes calling for me or something, not sure
>as i close the door, i take one last look at the shit puddle on her carpet
>see a mixture, looks odd, like greese and water
>realize it's my jizz
>even with shit covered legs and ruined 120 dollar jeans i laugh as i pull the door shut
those were the two most memorable girls for me, there were others, a girl named Lacy who actually came up to me and asking if i was waiting for someone, we didn't fuck that night or drink, and we actually ended up having regular sex for about 3 months. another was Jasmine, my first and only black girl, she wasn't that easy either, took a bit of effort but the goal was realized. Then there were the total failures, girls who just left, or wouldn't have sex with me.. I never did say it worked every time, I just said it worked well and worked often. As previously stated, feel free to employ The Jordin Method to your hearts content, I don't need it anymore. I have the woman I love.
>spend two years perfecting "The Jordin Method"
>random 8/10 wants a date
>well, ok i guess
>i show up as per usual
>first time whore has ever not shown up
>6/10 landwhale sitting where date should be
>confused, i go inside to take a piss
>realize this is the girl from the pictures +25 pounds
>who the fuck does this bitch think she is?
>dose tits doh
>i have nothing better to do, execute the next step of The Jordin Method
>bitch isn't really having it
>find out we have some stuff in common, she's kind of funny, we speak the same second language (not spanish you stupid fucks)
>we have dinner, enjoy each others company, she's smart as hell, actually has potential
>wonder if i'm actually in america being american
>alpha mask slips several times during the dinner
>she seems endeared when it happens
>weeks pass, really like the girl
>decide to be b/f g/f
>leave her in my bed one morning
>come home, shes still there
>sitting in living room with my 2nd cell phone
>"anon are you cheating on me?"
>i'm actually not, decide to be a decent person for the first time in my life
>explain The Jordin Method
>she wants more details
>certain things omitted of fucking course
>still, about 45 minutes of detail
>"and then i found you"
>her face is blank and she is silent for 10 of the longest seconds of my life
>she lets loose a sonic boom of laughter
>"i fucking love you anon"
>we're expecting our first child in two months